Understanding Men and Their Trauma with Dr. Gabor Maté | The Man Enough Podcast

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

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  • @cebee4464
    @cebee4464 Год назад +1122

    I'm literally crying! I have read all of Dr. Gabor Mate's books during pregnancy and it changed my whole perspective about how to raise a child. My one year old baby is now sleeping next to me and I'm so happy because of our strong attachment relationship. So if you're wondering what you could give to parents who are expecting a child just buy them his books. A generation of deeply loving parents could change this society for the better.

    • @tamaragraham6859
      @tamaragraham6859 Год назад +14

      👏👏❤️

    • @sharonrunning9317
      @sharonrunning9317 Год назад +51

      I am going to follow your suggestion and the next baby shower I go to I will gift the mother to be with his book on this important subject. Thank you

    • @michelletruth9995
      @michelletruth9995 Год назад +25

      @@sharonrunning9317 This is so great. We so need a trauma-informed society and we are doing it from the bottom up. You might also like to look into the books of Aletha Solter :)

    • @meganbaker9116
      @meganbaker9116 Год назад +10

      Anything by Alice Miller. “The Continuum Concept” by Jean Liedloff.

    • @nexxdev3837
      @nexxdev3837 Год назад +3

      6

  • @Dalabombana
    @Dalabombana Год назад +526

    I love this man. A gift to humanity.

  • @lettyrising9130
    @lettyrising9130 Год назад +364

    “The antidote to chaos isn’t order…it’s harmony.” I love that. It reminds me of something that someone I worked with once said “From chaos comes order, but not without the cost of freedom.” Harmony would solve the problem of lack of freedom.

    • @xikano8573
      @xikano8573 Год назад +7

      Yea, that one blew my mind also.

    • @davisx2002
      @davisx2002 Год назад +10

      I dont think rules for rules sake ever solved anything...I would love to hear Jordan Peterson respond to what Gabor is saying here. That would be worth a listen.

    • @chuckpowers569
      @chuckpowers569 Год назад +14

      @@davisx2002 easy to respond. What is harmony? And, how do you do it? What are the rules to harmony, and who gets to make those rules? You want harmony? Enslave everyone and make the rules they have to follow. You can enforce your new harmony with violence and the threat of violence. This is not a Utopian world, and you can't wish one into existence. The idea of harmony, like socialism, communism, and all of the other empty words is dependent upon the goodwill of every participant. If some people (criminals, opportunists, grifters, zealots, those seeking power) refuse your rules for harmony, there will only be the illusion of harmony. People have to start thinking deeper than this man's anger the patriarchy and Jordan Peterson will allow him to go. He's selling ideology while being critical of ideology. Interesting.

    • @lenavoyles526
      @lenavoyles526 Год назад +5

      Hi Chuck - a more technical way to approach the concept of “harmony” might be to look at systems theory. That might give you something you can actually sink your teeth into.

    • @chuckpowers569
      @chuckpowers569 Год назад +2

      @@lenavoyles526 I'm familiar with systems theory. In systems theory a negative system can be reinforced just like a good one. That doesn't answer any of the questions I proposed, and it risks dying in Utopian fantasies. Of course when every member has great intentions, a lot of systems can work--even a harmonic one. But, what happens when we bring our imperfections into the equation? Stuff goes sideways fast. That's where the questions I asked really surface.

  • @shaneibbs4439
    @shaneibbs4439 Год назад +316

    As a male therapist, still healing myself, I want to say thank you so much for putting this together. I have been aware of Gabor for several years, but i have avoided reading him for fear of retraumatising myslef having worked in the caring profession for 24+ years, as well as my own traumatic childhood. I am now going to order the book, The Myth of Normal.

    • @annaprana8004
      @annaprana8004 Год назад +13

      I think it’ll make a huge difference in your healing.
      It did in mine! 😊

    • @tamaragraham6859
      @tamaragraham6859 Год назад +11

      Bravo to you for facing your own vulnerability. ❤️

    • @DS-rd9qn
      @DS-rd9qn Год назад +12

      Check out "When the Body Says No" too, its awesome

    • @thiccletics
      @thiccletics Год назад +4

      HIGHLY recommend his other books and interviews! Best wishes 🫶🏽

    • @virgee.5263
      @virgee.5263 Год назад +11

      So validating! I was avoiding Gabor Mate also! Timing is everything, thank you for your honesty.

  • @barabara2127
    @barabara2127 11 месяцев назад +39

    Love how Dr. Maté is roasting Jordan Peterson ! Priceless and so so true. JP is full of rage. GM is grounded, humble, wise and a blessing to everyone who cares enough to listen

    • @alanarturdemitrovfernandes1161
      @alanarturdemitrovfernandes1161 7 месяцев назад +2

      Well, that's very contradictory... so you are saying that as men we should supress our anger so you can get happy while a supposed humble guru passive aggressively roasts somebody that is showing rage and has every reason to while preaching that we should not supress our rage? I think you both need therapy😂😂😂

    • @barabara2127
      @barabara2127 7 месяцев назад +5

      That is not what I’m saying but if that is what you took from this then I will leave you with your opinion, no point in arguing here.
      You can watch some more of his videos to get a clearer picture of Dr Gabor’s work, e.g. Dr.Gabor Mate on how to process anger and rage | The Tim Ferris Show.

    • @AleksandarIvanov69
      @AleksandarIvanov69 6 месяцев назад +3

      @@barabara2127 of course JP is full of rage, do you think there is nothing in the world to have rage about? Anger is actually a healthy response to threat. Is that a new idea to you?
      btw Jordan is also full of love, full of sadness, full of happiness etc. but that doesn't seem to matter to you, does it? I wonder why that is...

    • @ConsciousConversations
      @ConsciousConversations 5 месяцев назад +2

      Finally too! Everytime some one reasonably points out the damaging way Peterson has positioned himself and his daughter and … he just spun out and has dug his heels blindly in. His ego took total control of his life since his pop culture bubble began,

    • @lizzyshadows7402
      @lizzyshadows7402 2 месяца назад

      can I ask why you believe JP is "full of rage"? Honestly curious, I've watched a few of his videos and he seemed to have good views regarding trauma but if he's not all he's cracked up to be I want to know.

  • @b.l70
    @b.l70 2 месяца назад +2

    Dr. Mate is our Einstein for traumas and mental health.

  • @adamgorelick3714
    @adamgorelick3714 Год назад +120

    Imagine a world in which medical doctors and mental health professionals learn these truths; in which everyone is taught this sane approach to existence.

    • @davidchandler6885
      @davidchandler6885 Год назад

      Very dangerous game with doctors being taught anything like this in already system where they apply their personal beliefs. Docs get rid tons of patients saying their psychsomatic systems already, which is one anxiety just get rid of patients n not look for real causes. This just would make things even worse

    • @adamgorelick3714
      @adamgorelick3714 Год назад +6

      @@davidchandler6885 Gabor Mate never suggests that people's symptoms are psychosomatic, quite the opposite - he's describing how unresolved emotions can lead to actual illness.

    • @createone100
      @createone100 Год назад

      And the Law also!

    • @ledacedar6253
      @ledacedar6253 10 месяцев назад

      Currently, the obvious pharmaceutical mafia would advise we all fire the turds and grow healthy with these supports, counselling when needed and eating only food that heals the human body. That means getting off all junk crap never food filling your guts and ruining your body's ability to function like a Tesla! 5 yrs carnivore now & despite having Ankylosing spondylitis arthritis that was sheer 24/7 painful agonies plus, I no longer suffer any of that hell. The guts take a long time to heal so that remains the last challenge and I love my ND.
      She uses Vega testing (also called Electro Acupuncture, according to Voll or EAV testing) It uses the acupuncture points in the hands as access points to your body's sensitive electromagnetic system. From there, the machine measures electromagnetic fluctuations in your body in response to testing.
      you get Instant readings on my body's state: chakras, guts, organs & AI status; and then tests a plethora of potential products to help heal the issues,including chakras, organs, emotional turmoil and cortisol plus more. Sometimes what she thinks will help when tested shows it's not suited to my needs!
      This is the ND you know you want and you know your assured of immediate knowledge and what helps. Forget the Blood type diets, the Arthritis diet, the AS diet as none of these approaches are based in knowledge. Eat carnivore for thriving health and repairs to all body tissues from eyes, to organs, to energy fields and memory/brain triggering fear etc.

  • @Cv_224
    @Cv_224 Год назад +84

    My inner child experienced a ton of boundary violation, trauma and dysfunction at home and she is angry. My anger was suppressed for soooo long! Believe me, anger has a place in your healing. Embrace it!

    • @oneglobeoneloveofficial
      @oneglobeoneloveofficial Год назад +3

      Hiya, for what it is worth, I totally am hearing you. Although our stories are different, I too experienced a tonne of boundary violations, abuse and trauma at the hands of both parents. I was shown and told in various ways that any anger was bad and it was bad to be angry because people around me suppressed my anger. At 43 years old, I'm giving myself a space for all my anger and it's scary but right. I'm doing my best to allow the little girl in me to feel that anger and express it. People still try tell me my anger is bad and intolerable but I now know that their feelings about my anger has nothing to do with me. It's still hard and I still feel unseen. I wish you the best on your journey.

    • @gwenerwin4552
      @gwenerwin4552 Год назад +2

      Great show, great man. Having recovered from childhood trauma, I now embrace my mother's memory instead of excoriating her for being a bad mother. I am free in a way I could only imagine. Lots of AA , lots of addiction, but 40 years of joyous sobriety

  • @ecemwashere.
    @ecemwashere. Год назад +437

    I could listen Dr. Maté talk for hours, what a treasure of our time! 🙏Thank you for having him on the show 🙌

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +8

      Thank you for being here! We could have talked to him for hours as well.

    • @abundance_crystal698
      @abundance_crystal698 Год назад +2

      Yes, the way he talk sometimes could be defined as rude for normal society but I just cannot get enough of his "carelessness " talk

    • @ericmhowardii8410
      @ericmhowardii8410 Год назад +2

      Believe system Questions
      Who is asking the question ?
      Why do you ask
      the question ?
      What can you do ?

    • @SpectrumOfChange
      @SpectrumOfChange Год назад +7

      I DO listen to him for hours at a time, and gratefully.
      Dr. Maté has a book on ADHD that turns some central things on their head in the most expansive, wholesome way. HIGHLY recommend the read, Scattered Minds. It seems less known than his other works, for some reason but check it out.

    • @ecemwashere.
      @ecemwashere. Год назад +4

      @@SpectrumOfChange fellow ADHDer, hi! Im planning on reading it as an audiobook on my channel soon :)

  • @ronitgreenblum7182
    @ronitgreenblum7182 Год назад +105

    He said he is 5 foot 7 , however, he is a Giant. A giant in humility, in knowledge, in wisdom, in compassion and vulnerability. I think I am addicted to him and his wisdom but I am just fine about that.

    • @asantemungu9820
      @asantemungu9820 Год назад +2

      😇😇

    • @ledacedar6253
      @ledacedar6253 10 месяцев назад

      Short people result from under nourishment and under feeding of children from an early age, especially where Neglect exists.

    • @CR7_IS_THE_GOAT_14
      @CR7_IS_THE_GOAT_14 6 месяцев назад

      He’s wrong about Peterson, though

  • @ehlersdanlosmom6847
    @ehlersdanlosmom6847 Год назад +93

    wow. i became disabled 5 years ago, and my boyfriend of 18 years shared a text he got from a 'friend' of ours suggesting he run as 'I'm not worth the extra effort with my physical limitations.' I thought this was a friend of mine too, happens to be female. He shared it because we're no longer going to engage with this person, but the insult lingered. It swelled up inside of me and started to consume my beliefs about myself. It was so easy for me to let her infect my beliefs about myself. I'm changing this belief right now. I am enough.

    • @jackdeniston59
      @jackdeniston59 Год назад +22

      She wants him for herself. You sound surprised, in fact this female behaviour is very common. You both are right to exit her. Beware.

    • @georgegray2712
      @georgegray2712 Год назад +14

      And please tell your boyfriend how much you appreciate him. He sounds like really good man.

    • @georgegrote7836
      @georgegrote7836 Год назад +6

      In a world focused on outcomes, it’s hard to deal with the guilt of being trapped in a defective body. But, I don’t know you and I don’t blame you. Reality just feels the need to expand itself into the realm of all possibilities and we are cursed with the ability to perceive consciously. I hope you find comfort somewhere good. This is getting long, but I met a woman who, when she suffered a spinal injury jumping off a sailboat in the Mediterranean, was a VERY successful ballerina. I met her at a dinner with friends and she came in and said, “sorry I’m so late, but stairway to heaven was on and I had to sit in my car awhile and try not to kill myself.” A GREAT joke. But I couldn’t laugh because she was in a wheelchair and without knowing why, it felt wrong to make light of her situation. I didn’t know her injury history until maybe a few days later. Well, she did kill herself. 2-3 years later. It made me so sad even though I only met her that one time. Also, I lived with a bad hip for 13 years through parental neglect which devolved into self-neglect. I now have nerve damage that will need to be resolved through,probably, many surgeries. Plus, type 2 and/or(would need to consult dr notes as I basically freaked out when reading post-op notes) type 3 degeneration of my load bearing capacity of the hip. I’m 31. I was an elite athlete when I was injured at 17-18. And I mean, professional athletes were encouraging me to pursue an athletic career, post injury, which I knew I couldn’t fulfill long term as this was the phase where I did all my nerve damage trying to rehabilitate myself at any cost. Well, it cost. So, I’ve just rediscovered Gabor and I hope he brings you comfort. Be a brain or be a hand or be an understanding and honest and genuine friend. We are not static. And I hope you, stranger, will find your way because, if you do, you bring hope to the world in a million ways.

    • @daniel23554
      @daniel23554 Год назад +2

      @@georgegrote7836 Sorry to hear about those losses.
      It sounds like you needed to share it.
      There are so many different kinds of abilities that we humans have. Physical ones are just some of them, yet far from all of them.

    • @ppc5174
      @ppc5174 Год назад

      Thank you!❤

  • @ragacats
    @ragacats Год назад +99

    I love his epitaph: “It was a lot more work than I anticipated.” As one who has spent a lifetime healing my own trauma, and then becoming a professional trauma therapist, I know this to be true! And his humor about it is much appreciated.

  • @maijensen3317
    @maijensen3317 Год назад +147

    He is describing me. People pleaser from a young age, diagnosed with ADHD, evasive and borderline personality disorders, anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue and Hashimotos.
    All of it runs in my family and it's now my mission not to pass it on to my kids. I'm in therapy now and have just learned, at the age of 47, that it is ok for me to exist, it is ok to have my own opinions and it's ok to say NO knowing it might upset other people. I'm terrified of making other people disappointed, angry or sad. I get anxious if I don't please everybody all the time, can't eat or sleep. My body then starts to shut down and I get even more inefficient.
    Luckily I have stopped working, it is a blessing 🙏 I can now isolate my self and use all my energy on my children. Focusing on them and my therapy is the best thing ever!! They have the best dad I the world and they all seem to work well. I am so thankful!! But the thought that they still might end of like me is terrifying.
    My heart goes out to those who don't have the same privileges. Please take care of yourself ❤️

    • @SpectrumOfChange
      @SpectrumOfChange Год назад +3

      💛

    • @heynicolekunz1
      @heynicolekunz1 Год назад +2

      ❤❤❤🎉

    • @wintergirll
      @wintergirll Год назад +3

      Proud of you

    • @ratherboutside2
      @ratherboutside2 Год назад +8

      Everything you're doing now will shift your children and give them a head start in their own healing. Heal together!

    • @Pokedawn100
      @Pokedawn100 Год назад +2

      You may already know this, but all those can occur because of Hashimotos. Stay feeling well!

  • @loulh7899
    @loulh7899 9 месяцев назад +2

    Thank you for having Dr Mate on your podcast. He’s amazing and so full of wisdom and compassion.
    Please invite Dr Mate back soon. ❤

  • @lostincredulity5369
    @lostincredulity5369 Год назад +143

    Big fan of Gabor. I am a single dad with a 3 year old daughter. I have always sat and cuddled her through her feels and she is the best behaved 3 year old and is really kind and respectful to other people.
    Interestingly she has been winning awards for following all the rules at nursery but I don’t set many rules we talk and negotiate at home.
    I was/can identify with those men you talk about as I was treated very badly in two previous relationships so identified women as the problem. However, it was never women it was two abusive and one highly abusive individuals that did horrible things.
    Moving past this now as I look at all the lovely women in my life who have helped me through my trauma to help with my perspective.
    I think it’s the right time for me to be engaging with your content so I can be more how I used to be before those issues happened.

    • @meganbaker9116
      @meganbaker9116 Год назад +14

      It’s very sad but unsurprising that anyone gives children awards for following rules. This is really all society wants from children: Sit down. Shut up. Do your work. Gee, whyever are young people depressed?

    • @susanharris3552
      @susanharris3552 Год назад +5

      ​@@meganbaker9116 You're right, it is sad. Instead of society telling kids what it wants, society should listen to what the humans want.

    • @lenavoyles526
      @lenavoyles526 Год назад +2

      Beautiful. Thank you for sharing. ❤️

    • @human-ft3wk
      @human-ft3wk Год назад +4

      @@meganbaker9116 yeah. I was privileged to not have to work a job until I was 24. The first thought I had when I started working was "Oh I can do this, this is just like school". I don't think that I would've been able to go from full freedom, study whenever I want to, to: 8-9 hrs a day, 5 days a week you have to go to this place and do something you don't like consistently if I didn't go to school.
      School is designed to make humans familiar with being sucked dry for resources at a job, full stop. There is little thought put into that system to actually benefit the healthy living of our children.

    • @meganbaker9116
      @meganbaker9116 Год назад +4

      @@human-ft3wk That’s incredibly depressing. I know what school was designed for, and I hope parents continue taking their children out of that miserable warehouse. Crushing children’s spirit is bad for them and it’s bad for society.

  • @blissfulbaboon
    @blissfulbaboon Год назад +63

    Right on Gabor..Until both men and women realize their strength and personal power is being fully present in this moment , allowing themselves to feel and express their genuine feelings openly, without fear of censorship, condemnation and repression,there will be no personal empowerment, harmony or authentic connection , both interpersonally and subsequently as a community and culture at large.We are emotional beings and our emotional vulnerability is our STRENGTH. Listen to your feelings.They will take us all home.

    • @careynazyeustt5841
      @careynazyeustt5841 Год назад +3

      So true love 🖖🙏

    • @JonasAnandaKristiansson
      @JonasAnandaKristiansson Год назад +1

      YES!

    • @user-og6hl6lv7p
      @user-og6hl6lv7p Год назад +3

      I think you'll find it's majority men that are oppressed in terms of being open about their feelings, by other men...and women! Say something nice to the next young man you meet.

  • @Jennifer-bw7ku
    @Jennifer-bw7ku Год назад +11

    Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

    • @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU
      @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU Год назад

      Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!

    • @elizabethwilliams6651
      @elizabethwilliams6651 Год назад

      Yes, dr.sporesss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.

    • @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU
      @APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU Год назад

      Is he on instagram?

    • @elizabethwilliams6651
      @elizabethwilliams6651 Год назад

      Yes he is. dr.sporesss

    • @patriaciasmith3499
      @patriaciasmith3499 Год назад

      Microdosing helped me get out of the pit of my worst depressive episode, a three year long episode, enough to start working on my mental health.

  • @DocumentTheDownfall
    @DocumentTheDownfall Год назад +8

    I would absolutely LOVE to view a discussion with Gabor and Jordan Peterson

  • @shahnejad313
    @shahnejad313 Год назад +44

    You have touched a lot of stuff I am going through at age 65. I survived a heart attack in 2016 and my wife cancer in 2018. I have changed so much. I am constantly afraid about living I need more community to help me and not to be alone. I happy to hear your stories.

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +5

      Thank you for joining us. We're glad you survived and have found your way to us.

    • @mandy6860
      @mandy6860 Год назад +1

      Find what brings you peace and joy. I've had multiple health issues last 2 years stress burn out, past trauma and emotions surfacing. I'm on a restricted diet to heal my gut health issues, being doing kundalini yoga, guided meditations online, walking alone and with friends, and journaling my emotions /thoughts things I can't express. Also did some talking therapy which has helped too. I'm gradually getting better, feeling more at peace. Do more of things that bring you joy and be patient with yourself.

    • @doriannemosich232
      @doriannemosich232 9 месяцев назад

      Thank you for your comment, it's an antidote for happiness more community, since a very young age also attracted to animals wildlife nature, daily hikes in nature with 3 dogs is a lifesaver. Stay happy healthy Shane

  • @janetlivingstone63
    @janetlivingstone63 Год назад +11

    Finally, someone who makes sense of so many things! Modern medicine ignores the body-mind connection; our culture is brutal in its disregard for mother-child attachment, etc. YES! Such a monumental relief to hear these things articulated when we may subliminally feel them, but cannot put words to them. Thank you so much for this podcast!

    • @Ryan-cb1ei
      @Ryan-cb1ei Месяц назад

      I am a bit skeptical of his claims about suppressing emotions causing certain conditions however, especially causing them in women.

  • @janicecass2713
    @janicecass2713 Год назад +3

    I'm a woman from the UK, who had server early S.A. and other abuse.
    Can I say thank you, this is the best interview with Gabor Maté I've ever listened to.
    Sincerely thank you.
    Thank you
    Dr. Gabor Maté.

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  10 месяцев назад

      Thank you. Glad you're here with us. Sending love as you heal from that past.

  • @energybengt
    @energybengt Год назад +5

    Depression is hiding emotions that are not acceptable or receivable by parents, and turning these inward. I'm so grateful to have this person's studies available to reflect and consider and help to tease apart the inauthenticity that has flavored my person identity. I guess the time is right for this to inform and integrate. Thank you for all who contribute to this sea of awareness we are.

  • @daniel23554
    @daniel23554 Год назад +3

    Gabor Mate is not just intelligent and caring, he has that rare -- and much needed -- combination of compassion, practical understanding and wisdom. He is brilliant -- and well worth listening to and learning from!

  • @vickieevans9323
    @vickieevans9323 Год назад +11

    Was recently introduced by my therapist to Gabor Mate' book the Myth of Normal, as soon as I watch my first interview on line with him, My mind/body immediately recognized the deep ancient wisdom Gabor articulates for us, on one hand shatters all I thought I knew to be true(painful) and on the other hand a healing balm. Thank Gabor for bringing us this wisdom ,the more I listen and read the more I cry my heart out from the deepest center of my core being, a grief and a lovingness so profound

  • @ZsuzsaKoteles
    @ZsuzsaKoteles 11 месяцев назад +4

    a fellow Hungarian:) we all love him and always happy to see him in Budapest! Kedves Gábor, minden jót kívánok!

  • @Goodwill2010
    @Goodwill2010 Год назад +55

    Apart from loving dr. Gabor Mate, I would like to express my gratitude to the 3 interviewers: your honesty, vulnerability and curiosity made it a really creditable and fascinating conversation. I loved your questions and special thank to the lady saying "köszönöm" at the end! As a Hungarian listener this gesture warmed my heart. ❤🙏

  • @lauriewaitz601
    @lauriewaitz601 Год назад +87

    Gabor has been my hero for a very long time. He reminds me what unconditional love means. This discussion kept me in tears for its entirety

  • @Tani4eva
    @Tani4eva Год назад +5

    Gabor Maté is the Man! Lovingly Schooling them & exposes Jordan Petersen for who he truly is!

  • @sueemmel9109
    @sueemmel9109 Год назад +18

    This could well be the conversation of the century. Why do I say that? because the emphasis on the equality of women alone has left men out of the equation. Talking about the needs and rights of women without including the needs and rights of men is unequal. It takes two balanced wings to fly anywhere.
    Rarely do men open up to examine their reality, in public, for all to see and hear, with such clarity and vulnerability and fairness as this. These are the champions. This conversation is the forerunner of a new and better 9.0 society.

    • @lenavoyles526
      @lenavoyles526 Год назад +1

      If you enjoyed this inclusion of men’s vulnerabilities and needs you might also enjoy some of Warren Farrell’s work, for example, The Boy Crisis. Farrell actually started out as one of the first outspoken male feminists before turning his attention to men’s needs.

    • @Ryan-cb1ei
      @Ryan-cb1ei Месяц назад +1

      Agreed, I just wish he just didn’t cater to the women are sugar and spice and all things nice narrative at some points. Not that he directly did but he ignored the toxic sides of the sort of feminine take over of the public consciousness that we see today, that we can also tell has issues. Patriarchy isn’t bad or good, in fact it has served us well, but there are side effects we don’t like. The same would likely be true of a matriarchy, it probably wouldn’t be any better or worse and we can’t even say where we’d be with under such a system. There are most definitely toxic aspects already that we see of the feminization of the public consciousness and public domain, so I just wish he kind of addressed both sides there and came to some conclusion on how we can achieve a balance. There was not enough shooting down of the overreaction to the conventional thinking (in my opinion) surrounding some of these things that I believe is also bull.

  • @ManiMohanty
    @ManiMohanty Год назад +24

    I am crying so badly I have never thought about childhood trauma can be so scientifically proven Thankyou Dr. Gabor Mate for making me understand everything so beautifully your knowledge giving me goosebumps becoz we have never studied this in our education system ever.
    👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  • @chrissietom123
    @chrissietom123 Год назад +29

    “To be a human being, in connection with myself in the present moment” - I was overcome with emotion hearing that, took my breath and tears.

  • @janetdiaz8916
    @janetdiaz8916 Год назад +3

    I heard a Christian man say something admirable a few years back. He said that he puts his wife (stay at home) in charge of the household. She understands better the children, schedules, room layout and household needs, and so forth. He works his schedule around the family as best he can. He even puts her in charge of picking a hotel room when they travel, she has a knack for picking the best facing room and amenities. He says he does not have that skill. He still has a large list of responsibilities himself. But for those who do things differently, they should trust each other to do what they are best at in their home. But no matter what, I believe the man must love his wife. That is first on the list for a harmonious home. No matter how much a woman tries to do her part, it will be chaotic and a heavy weight without love from her husband.

  • @sunyoungpark910
    @sunyoungpark910 Год назад +51

    I didn't finish watching this yet but I want to say that it is not just Gabor who is amazing but also the whole crew...I absolutely love how Jamie didn't put a smiley face and stayed with his own feelings because he had a difficult day. It shows his strength. I love all of their insights and honesty...Their sincerity toward humanity really shows...Thank you for being who you are...I am so moved...

    • @gwenwalker6925
      @gwenwalker6925 Год назад +1

      Really feelin this too 😊

    • @chocolateradiance7216
      @chocolateradiance7216 Год назад +1

      Black ppl have a separate set of trauma especially bm..they typically are suspicious of therapy and therapist and don't like to be told if something is wrong with them. I am surprised he even showed up..bm can be very arrogant concerning their own issues but use women as a punching bag..not physically but to blame for everything. They don't usually take advice from wm and alot practice toxic masculinity. I am not surprised he struggled to show up. They aren't used to straight up talk about what's going on or what they could possibly be doing wrong..more being cuddled from the black community. They resent being told about themselves and see it as an attack which is funny based on how much they verbally attack women and sometimes physically too..

    • @startfromwithin8107
      @startfromwithin8107 Год назад +2

      ​@@chocolateradiance7216 are all bm the same? I am asking you that as a bw. Jamie was honest and nice to Gabor. We need more men like this guys.

  • @petrons5384
    @petrons5384 Год назад +26

    I started working in a Hospital and can relate to what you said about health anxiety. I get home after work and basically go to bed straight away. I am slowly learning to protect my energy and be self aware around my own trauma and what belongs to others

  • @mariaegervari6339
    @mariaegervari6339 Год назад +75

    This is amazing! 2 days ago I shared Justin's TED talk with the Compassionate Inquiry community. Compassionate Inquiry is the therapeutic approach developed by Gabor and I am one of the facilitators in the course and use this approach in my practice. I kept thinking that Justin and Gabor need to be in the same space and talk. And two days later, voila, it happened. Thank you for this great conversation.

    • @asantemungu9820
      @asantemungu9820 Год назад

      Wow! How awesome that Your thoughts "attracted" the idea and it turned out as a reality for Justine and Dr Gabor in the same space and talk. I love this.

    • @dilufapy
      @dilufapy Год назад +2

      Googling now compassionate inquiry therapeutic approach! Thank you!

  • @keithwilliams7722
    @keithwilliams7722 10 месяцев назад +3

    This literally has been an answered prayer. I have been watching several Gabor Mate videos lately and have been uncovering my own extensive trauma because of it. As a Baha'i I was questioning how much to dig versus just living the life. I so appreciate the last words. Songs that magically came over the gym speakers over the last few days have been Refugee by Tom Petty and Don't Stop by Fleetwood Mac which kind of sums up Gabor's last words in this interview.

  • @stephaniejones1316
    @stephaniejones1316 Год назад +14

    Having a child with ADHD helped me become a more balanced person. I experienced trauma when I was young but was not able to process it. I was very angry as a young mother. I have had to apologize to my children now that they are older. The damage is done. They carry trauma now too. I try to help them as best I can to share my conscious awareness journey. I pay for their counselling and any other thing they need. If I could go back I would not make them pay. I used my anger on them in a negative way. I work with people who seek to have emotional mastery. I loving helping people now. I thank my family for helping me to get to where I am today. I owe them my life. Love all.

    • @chocolateradiance7216
      @chocolateradiance7216 Год назад +4

      Same...I was a very angry young mother. My kid's paid the price and my son was very petrified of me. I wish ppl wouldn't have kid's until they are healed and happy..

  • @create2liberate
    @create2liberate Год назад +7

    This is everything. Dr. Mate is one of the most important voices of our time.

  • @bluesaildoc
    @bluesaildoc Год назад +3

    I just finished your book Dr. Mate, as a Pediatric Trauma Physician with over 35 years of experience working in the trenches caring for children with physical, sexual or emotional abuse AND now a Conscious Parenting Coach I have to say I agree with 95% of what you teach. Super glad you are calling Jordan Peterson out. Would love to discuss what I don’t agree with you about but I think the woman in this interview hit upon it. 🙏 for your work

  • @lizobasuke8765
    @lizobasuke8765 Год назад +2

    That is one conversation that I have wanted to hear for years, Gabor Mate and Jordon Peterson, I think its very interesting that it still hasn't happened?

  • @hopenkwelle8874
    @hopenkwelle8874 Год назад +18

    Never have I listened to GM, MD and not learned something new new. You are one of the reasons I still hold my dream to be an MD regardless of where I am right now. Thanks again! With your tools, I hope I make a good father of May to make this world a better place fr fr. Arigato!

  • @arturohull14161
    @arturohull14161 Год назад +2

    I’m gonna buy all of Dr. Maté’s books. I’m starting on my healing journey. I grew up in a dysfunctional family. I survived a hazing incident, multiple assaults, psychological abuse, and brown bear attacks among other things. I’m starting my healing journey and I’m ready to heal.

  • @jolene8497
    @jolene8497 Год назад +6

    I would love to see a debate between Gabor Maté and Jordan Peterson!

  • @joesyogafitness6085
    @joesyogafitness6085 Год назад +4

    Every effort is gold. Without new thoughts no growth. Being listened to is the beginning of healing, taking turns is priceless. Everyone needs to be heard in order to heal. No feelings no healing, it’s as simple as that.

  • @sunnylove3521
    @sunnylove3521 Год назад +4

    Thank you sooo much. Love Dr Gabor and love you 3 for inviting him. I am a 70 yrs old female and I am so pleased with this knowledge🙏🏽👋🏾❤

  • @Georgiana400k
    @Georgiana400k Год назад +8

    This man is such a kind soul, Im so happy I dont have words

  • @anya.alexandra
    @anya.alexandra Год назад +7

    I’m thrilled to see Dr. Gabor Maté here! Thank you for inviting him!

  • @NiKi-ij2ln
    @NiKi-ij2ln Год назад +9

    I would say the answer to chaos is awareness, and only through awareness we can have harmony.

  • @prairiecherie5743
    @prairiecherie5743 Год назад +5

    I am so relieved someone has finally described Peterson accurately. I’ve been saying he’s an angry man wanting revenge on liberals. He’s cultivating thousands of men.

    • @dalialovesdoggies4361
      @dalialovesdoggies4361 Год назад

      And very sore

    • @Ryan-cb1ei
      @Ryan-cb1ei Месяц назад

      And those liberals he seems to want revenge on, want revenge as well. Both sheep who don’t actually understand why things are the way they are.

  • @aspasiagabriel4477
    @aspasiagabriel4477 Месяц назад

    Beautiful meeting! Thanks for sharing your presence here! It really shows how awareness is growing. Thank you. 🙏

  • @ennybm
    @ennybm Год назад +5

    Maté preaches harmony. Peterson actualises harmony. Both have their purpose. Standing on the sideline and judging, will grant a 'I didn't do anything shield'. But at the same time you just stood at the sideline..
    Many people who gather behind Peterson, would not ever consider Gabor Maté's words 10years ago. Esp so if you have experienced a cold and hard 'manly' world all your life. Eg Go talk to some workers in the metal industry.
    Thankfully, Peterson is closing that bridge and allowing those men to get a glimpse of vulnerability and to allow their emotions. Gabor preaches the end goal, Peterson is working his way towards it.
    Seeing such a great voice oppose another, with the same goal, is disheartening.
    But if the internet needs a dichotomy, it shall be so. Great talk by Gabor regardless.

  • @magiao880
    @magiao880 Год назад +1

    Thank God he exists and talks!

  • @guilhermegalante2869
    @guilhermegalante2869 Год назад +15

    Loved the part he says the opposite of chaos is harmony..

  • @johnlester4987
    @johnlester4987 Год назад +30

    I'm subscribing. I found you all via Dr. Mate. You all give a great gift to the world and thank you. I'm feeling slightly anxious right now because of discovering Dr. Mate and your podcast relatively late in life (52) and feel that I have so much work to do to become a healthy functioning human and dad. Still. Thank you so much for being you, and for creating this podcast.

    • @krispate1558
      @krispate1558 Год назад +8

      It is usually in midlife that you wake up to this inner work. Some call it a midlife crisis. You are right on track. Your life experiences for 52 years is the only way you can now relate to these idea here. You are right where you are supposed to be. You are not behind schedule. Healing love to you!

    • @johnlester4987
      @johnlester4987 Год назад +4

      @@krispate1558 Thank you for the insight and encouragement, Kris. Yes, I've thought a lot about the term "mid-life crisis" and what it means for people.

  • @MarkShepherd1
    @MarkShepherd1 Год назад +35

    The antidote to chaos in not order - but HARMONY!

    • @jamesgrey13
      @jamesgrey13 Год назад +1

      It takes both!

    • @NicholasPR
      @NicholasPR Год назад +3

      When I heard that, I felt something important was missed: harmony is the end result that we shoot for, but order is the mechanism that bridges the gap between chaos and harmony - and harmony itself is order. A balanced order. Order is the scaffolding that builds the framework for the building of harmony

    • @jamesgrey13
      @jamesgrey13 Год назад +3

      @@NicholasPR There can be harmony without order, but it's aimless! There can be order without harmony, but its tyrannical and unstable! By themselves they just breed different forms of chaos!

    • @MarkShepherd1
      @MarkShepherd1 Год назад +1

      @@NicholasPR yes, I believe many of our human instincts or impulse is to apply order without much consideration to harmony.

  • @alexannahope7707
    @alexannahope7707 Год назад +1

    Yesyesyes please return to respect our natural efforts to cooperate with our instincts. A national campaign for healthy touch and supporting women will change us all for the better

  • @tamaragraham6859
    @tamaragraham6859 Год назад +8

    I'm listening through this podcast a second time. And I'm getting more out of it than I did the first. My son turns 18 tomorrow and I want to say that raising him to be a man in touch with his vulnerability and his emotions and not being afraid of them, Is changing the entire dynamic within my family. I love the part where Dr Mate talks about talking to veterans. My dad was a Vietnam vetl and was raised to be a very toxic male to begin with, going to war and suffering from PTSD and not healing from it was incredibly traumatizing for my entire family. The toxic traits of what your value as a human is was instilled In myself and my siblings. I've spent my entire adulthood, I am now 52, working to overcome this because I know it is not the way that I am supposed to naturally be. And even trying to have the conversations with my brother who is 47 regarding his own toxic masculinity has been a challenge. He tries to treat my son the way that society treats men and I don't have it and neither does my son. And it's a source of contention for us. And I point out to my brother that the loving nurturing parts of him were given to him by the females in the family - his mother and sisters - and that's who he naturally is as a person. You can't control. You have to let people make their decisions for themselves and you have to raise children to be in touch with who they are as humans and not try to suppress any of it. It has been life-changing for myself and it is giving my son a true chance at being an incredible human being. His empathy and compassion for others is amazing and it is evidence for me that though this was difficult work to raise him this way in the society that we have, it was all worth it. ❤️

  • @angiekitson-harris4257
    @angiekitson-harris4257 Год назад

    I could.listen to Gabor all.day long, so full of wisdom and common sense. Brilliant human being. ❤

  • @108things8
    @108things8 Год назад +11

    I wrote in my thesis a small piece about our history so we can remember that we are afraid of the feminine- terrified- 1 million and more burned for claiming their autonomy. Thank you Gabor, blessings.

    • @Skeptimystic
      @Skeptimystic Год назад +1

      You may be interested in the book by the late Leonard Shlain, titled “The Alphabet Versus The Goddess.” In it, he discusses the left and right brain values, just as Dr Maté describes, and how over-emphasized the left brain’s qualities have been for centuries, and the damage that has been done as a result.

    • @onlycorner5565
      @onlycorner5565 Год назад

      ruclips.net/video/ah-ldSwF5hg/видео.html

  • @iincredibledible
    @iincredibledible Год назад +2

    I was so proud to be a mother who didnt work. I did work, I worked with my children on a farm. I also brought my child up in the traveller community, where the whole community would look after the children. There was a massive amount of trauma because of how the system fought to dismantle our culture, and we were all traumatised from our own childhood, so our children didnt grew up perfect. But we fought for their rights to a happy childhood.

  • @thecatsbackyard4833
    @thecatsbackyard4833 Год назад +15

    I wish I woulda found this guy sooner. I wish more people could benefit from him and a psychotherapist assisted psychedelic experience.

    • @savvybytes3748
      @savvybytes3748 Год назад +5

      Old saying… When the student is ready the teacher will appear. 🙏

  • @trishwilliams3153
    @trishwilliams3153 Год назад +2

    I want to thank you all, for your vulnerability, honesty, compassion and effort in our busy, imperfect life, to come together and express publicly the wanderings of our minds, the feelings of our hearts and completing the circular journey through addressing the path of healing each other 🙏❤️

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +1

      Thank you for the kind words. Glad you're here.

  • @sherieharkins2460
    @sherieharkins2460 Год назад +4

    Have appreciated GM’s wisdom often. It is important to understand how toxic rage is not only for the traumatized person but for those around them. I believe self control is as important as healthy anger.
    I have actually found Peterson more open and attentive in listening to people he is speaking with (acknowledging, as he does, that he gets excited and often talks too much). I was disappointed to hear colleague disparaging, there is space for multiple insights.
    Thank you all for sharing.

    • @xatheus
      @xatheus Год назад

      100%

    • @depressedessendonfan5702
      @depressedessendonfan5702 Год назад

      I think Peterson would actually listen to this guy

    • @kennethoneal7026
      @kennethoneal7026 Год назад

      @@depressedessendonfan5702 I agree. also with OP. It was the only negative thing ive heard in relation to Mate. He also misquoted mr peterson in relation to how to deal with children, at least i feel

  • @frankbreuer8849
    @frankbreuer8849 Год назад

    Look at them faces. They soak up every single word. Same here. Gabor has the incredible gift to explain the big picture in simple words and to provide specific details that have the quality to prove the points he's making. Hands down one of best in mental health.

  • @irenewallis5805
    @irenewallis5805 Год назад +37

    So unbelievably on point...I listen, I absorb and I cry...Thank you Gabor! An incredibly authentic depiction on not only our culture, behaviour, disease and addiction. Thank you!

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +5

      Thanks for sharing. He is quite incredible, isn't he?

    • @saa9099
      @saa9099 Год назад +3

      @@WeAreManEnough thanks for having Gabor on. I wish I had heard him speak a decade ago. He is on point. Maybe it's not too late to know his wisdom.

    • @dalialovesdoggies4361
      @dalialovesdoggies4361 Год назад +2

      @@WeAreManEnough normal human being. LOVE

  • @karenlindley9265
    @karenlindley9265 11 месяцев назад +2

    I went across your podcast for first time! I am extremely grateful for your self awareness and spiritual journey! Also for including a female energy in your group,a perfect harmony, balance with both energies female and male! From a metaphysical point of view and a holistic point of view respectfully we need to return to "divine feminine energy" for few reasons..
    * To return through love vibration..
    * To regain our power that was taking away through the patriarchy system..
    * To create an inclusive healing journey for humanity..
    * To empower OTHERS..
    * To find ourselves..
    * To eradicate WARS..
    * To shift the energy..
    * To lift our vibration consciously & collectively..
    * To provide "sacred spaces"..
    * To embrace the good,the bad & the ugly as part of spiritual teachings..
    * To raise healthy humans..
    * To protect mother Earth..
    * To open our hearts with zero hidden agenda..
    And many more reasons..
    Men versus women energy are completely opposite,they are different vibrations..! I write my own self reflections about spiritual things and as a Reiki master, ignore the word master ( energy healing ) plus as a woman & indigenous from Costa Rica,living in USA for more than half my life,I learned a lot through pain, suffering, depression & isolation..! Pain is a blessing in disguise to be honest..
    Also we all have "hidden gifts", even the Bible mentions it "9 Spiritual Gifts"..As a pisces & psychic I tapping into the Spiritual World,to be able to help others to find healing through that dimension..
    I hope one day Dr Gabor Maté can visit AK,when we can facilitate a deeply conversation and a sacred space for healing to take place..I have no doubt it will happen,when divine assistance & perfect synchronicity is part of that spiritual journey..
    In the meantime I am absorbing his topics to provide a more deeply & understanding process into healing,for the homeless community and others vulnerable communities in need of compassion and understanding for their pain, trauma and addictions..
    Including myself too,I have more self healing to do & extra classes to take,such hypnotherapy classes in particular "past lives",to combine with Reiki and other holistic approaches to embrace broken hearts and split lights, waiting to be WHOLE AGAIN..
    Blessings and best wishes for all of you..! 💠💕🙏🥺💚🌺😔

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  10 месяцев назад +1

      Thank you! Appreciate your thoughtful response and glad you're here with us.

    • @karenlindley9265
      @karenlindley9265 10 месяцев назад

      @@WeAreManEnough I am glad you are providing a platform to embrace broken hearts & support men in a more healthy & holistic approach,for them to be whole! Emotional intelligence is fundamental for men,to open their hearts chakras,to tap into love & embrace vulnerability as a strength not a weakness..
      You can be very strong & soft at the same time..
      I am proud of yourselves doing it " intuitively"..Keep going we have much more healing to do,to create more healthy humans for a better World..🙏🙏🙏🥺💕🌺💠

  • @carlsonnen4167
    @carlsonnen4167 Год назад +3

    The essence of what it takes to be a mature man or a mature woman is exactly the same. It lies in empathy and the heart and has little to nothing to do with curves, muscles or appearance in general, for all human beings are innately and equally beautiful, just like all living creatures are beautiful, although we all think and act ugly sometimes.

  • @tashinga.munjanga
    @tashinga.munjanga Год назад +1

    Dr. Gabor Mate is phenomenal.

  • @simonwatmough8305
    @simonwatmough8305 Год назад +3

    Obviously I have known about you guys before today but this is the first episode of your podcast I have ever come across. This podcast is amazing and Gabor's wisdom is incredible. Thank you so much

  • @MerryMaryH
    @MerryMaryH Год назад

    We come here to experience growth and expansion. There will be obstacles to overcome. The deepest satisfaction comes from overcoming the odds and working hard to obtain our goals. No one gets through life unscathed. Been there, done that. How many people have said they would not make the cancer not happen, the childhood not happen, etc. Because the experience made them who they are now. I absolutely do not believe in traumatizing children. I do not believe in corporal punishment. But I do believe we choose our parents and our circumstances pre-birth to have the growth and expansion we are looking for this time around. I admire Gabor Mate' very much, and following him has given me insight into the actions of people in my life. Myself included.

  • @omittapir5986
    @omittapir5986 Год назад +3

    So humble , down to earth, witty and a soft charmer. We need more doctors like him. Brilliant podcast as ever.

  • @JRacevedo81
    @JRacevedo81 Год назад +1

    This was the first time I heard of your Podcast/listened to this episode at 5:30 am with tears dampening my pillow…
    Im 41 & I’ve been working on my own traumas in talk therapy for 7 years now, after hearing this episode I really feel Affirmed in the work I have been doing yet also feel determined to enter into a deeper level of healing work for myself because alooooot of stuff is coming to the surface these days and it gets really overwhelming at times.
    God Bless you all and thank you for sharing your lives!

  • @sunnygirl9691
    @sunnygirl9691 Год назад +12

    One problem with opening up everyone to vulnerability with emotions/feelings as an operating system for society is the majority of people don't have a good "healthy" internal structure in place due to growing up IN the toxic families/culture/world. Their structure is defective. Immaturity, violence, and predatory behaviors all evolve out of "feelings" just like compassion, kindness, and harmony. We have to be careful of how we educate people about "feelings" and how to uncover a deeper truth of self.

  • @CdnGrady
    @CdnGrady Год назад +1

    First off, this podcast series is beyond brilliant, it's so needed in this day and age. I have enjoyed catching up on previous episodes and recommending it to everyone I know (no matter gender). I have been a fan of Dr. Mate since 2001 when I read Scattered Minds. I always get something from his talks, presentations, writings, etc but I really loved it (as did Dr. Mate) in your format with Justin, Jamey, and Liz. As a late-diagnosed Autistic ADHD'er (54) I have been dealing with trauma, depression, anxiety, etc all my life and it's through his work that I have really made the most significant breakthroughs as he removes the shame that affects so many of us struggling with mental health challenges. Thank you to all four of you for the work you are doing; it's inspired me to continue my path to service to those in need, my community, and the global community as a whole.

  • @Louismangion
    @Louismangion Год назад +3

    A - Mazing ... Literally BLOW MY MIND This Guy. I am SO Grateful to have stumbled onto this Podcast 🙏 THANKYOU

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад

      We're so grateful you stumbled on us too! Welcome.

  • @Grandpa_Boxer
    @Grandpa_Boxer Год назад +2

    Dr. Mate is a "gift" to humanity!!!

  • @christiorca4432
    @christiorca4432 Год назад +3

    Thank ypu Gabor, we all are so blessed to hear your healing words.

  • @_brandonarcher
    @_brandonarcher Год назад +1

    This is the real medicine men need to hear. The journey to masculinty goes through trauma, and embraces all ascpects of being a human.

  • @lisamarron7590
    @lisamarron7590 Год назад +3

    I’m so grateful that you had him on your show! For me, “When the body says No” has been one of the most influential books in my life and I couldn’t wait for his new book to come out. I’ve listened to this episode over a couple of lunch breaks now, because I had to stop it so many times to take notes. Every line he says is just so impactful. I got even more excited when he started talking about Bessel van der Kolk and Bruce Perry, my other two favourite authors and psychiatrists! I can’t say how much it meant to me that he was promoting their work as well. I wish I could meet all of them. Maybe they could be on the show too? 😊

  • @nathananderson8720
    @nathananderson8720 Год назад +1

    This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my RUclips channel 6 months ago about self development. Now I have 464 subs and > 100 hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I could haven’t learned without getting started in the 1st place.

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +2

      That's incredible, congratulations!

    • @nathananderson8720
      @nathananderson8720 Год назад +2

      @@WeAreManEnough I genuinely appreciate such kind words!
      Lots of grinding and dirty work that have been happening behind the scenes to finally upload my next one this month, which is more than about 2 hr lng and tackles one of the most common but subtle problems in our society that people might be able to solve if they fully grasp the message I’m trying to portray.
      Trust me, even when it’s slow, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t been moving forward. Speed is not the greatest determinant of progress and no matter how exhausting it is at times to create videos, I do enjoy the process and this gives me a meaningful existence. I hope that you’ll get value from it.

  • @ellarach
    @ellarach Год назад +6

    You are a blessing to all human kind. I’m absolutely inspired by your beautiful humility. Thank you.

  • @nadiaakbarali7632
    @nadiaakbarali7632 Год назад

    This whole convo. So grateful for all of you holding space and allowing ❤

  • @efortune357
    @efortune357 Год назад +32

    Some Quotes:
    40:07 Gabor: “When you say to a child ‘When you’re angry you can’t be around me.’ What message does the child get? …”
    44:00 Gabor: “There’s a British psychologist, Richard Bentall, who’s a member of the British Academy who summed up the literature very beautifully, the scientific literature. He said that the link between childhood adversity and adult mental health illness is as strong, as well documented as the link between cigarette smoking and lung cancer. And the average physician never hears that. Never hears it. It’s not part of their education.”
    48:38 Liz Plank, author, journalist: “I totally agree with your points about the patriarchy and how it is based on a society of doing, and pushes men into certain roles. But almost, feminism, the latest version of it, if you take the last ten years, it’s been about a very masculine take on feminism, and a very masculine take on how women should succeed, and how they should perform. And in many ways, again, made women more stressed.
    And it’s not bad that women are working. Obviously. But how can we have a healthier approach to female empowerment? To creating a more supportive society for everybody?”
    Gabor: “First of all, I’d like to rephrase the last question not to female empowerment but human empowerment. Because in this culture both men and women lack genuine power.”

    ***55:08 Gabor: “A Canadian study. Men who were sexually abused have triple the rate of heart attacks as adults. Because trauma causes inflammation in the body. And trauma also makes you behave in ways, you know a child who is sexually abused, they should be very angry. But can they afford to be angry? What would happen during the sexual abuse if a little boy got angry? They’d be even more hurt. So they repress their rage. Then that rage may come out of them later on in the form of these rage attacks.
    So, I talked about healthy, ‘You’re in my space. Get out.’ But that’s gone as soon as it’s done it’s job. The rage that’s repressed keeps breaking out of you like a volcanic eruption. And as you said earlier Liz, in the aftermath of a rage episode a person has double the risk of a heart attack or a stroke. Cause in the aftermath of a rage episode, which men are prone to, the blood pressure goes up, the blood vessels narrow, clotting factors go up, and so on. So we pay a heavy emotional price for the childhood traumas. Heavy emotional price and heavy physiological price. And the average physician never gets a single lecture about anything I’ve said today.”

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +4

      Powerful.

    • @meineinnereWelt
      @meineinnereWelt Год назад +4

      Thank You for the Quotes ❤

    • @bellakrinkle9381
      @bellakrinkle9381 Год назад +3

      Psychology and Psychiatry in the US are considered lowest on the status rung
      amongst all the other medical practices. This attitude colors attitudes of acceptance, I believe, in USA.

    • @meineinnereWelt
      @meineinnereWelt Год назад +5

      I think it's similar everywhere, who wants to see a psychiatrist.
      In the past, the men in white coats came to pick you up, and there was something wrong with you. Pull yourself together .....
      I was born in 1963
      That's why Gabor's new book title is so appropriate.
      We need a trauma-informed society

    • @laurelgardner
      @laurelgardner Год назад +2

      Reminds me of what bell hooks said about men being disempowered because without being able to understand their emotional selves, they don't have access to any genuine self-esteem.

  • @sherryfracheymusic
    @sherryfracheymusic Год назад +1

    This supports the best practice of restorative justice..

  • @Still-We-Rise
    @Still-We-Rise Год назад +3

    Thank God for Gabor. A wisdom and compassion so needed.🥲

  • @AntoinetteMPetty
    @AntoinetteMPetty Год назад +1

    Thank you, Man Enough Podcast, for having Mr. Mate's on the show. Amazing 👏🏿 ❤💐💐💐💐

  • @MarkShepherd1
    @MarkShepherd1 Год назад +9

    Amazing opening about understanding WHO is asking "Am I enough" and how this so called feeling is actually just another evaluation.

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +2

      Yeah, that was a really interesting angle. Love how the conversation keeps expanding.

    • @MarkShepherd1
      @MarkShepherd1 Год назад +1

      This guy is such a good listener.

  • @brentmacklem1872
    @brentmacklem1872 Год назад +1

    This is incredibly real and powerful. Read Gabor's latest book. I have worked for decades to become my real authentic self by stopping people pleasing and trying to be someone else. Who are you? I bet you are more special than you will ever know. Big thanks to @We Are man Enough. I raised four children to adulthood. AM I MAN ENOUGH? Is Gabor man enough? We are all human enough to want to grow and be better.

  • @user-rb5vo7vn6y
    @user-rb5vo7vn6y Год назад +9

    This is the 3rd man enough podcast I’ve watched/listened to and I am so so so so grateful for the work you guys are doing and the amazing guests you speak with and what they are doing. It just makes me want to cry and jump for joy all at the same time because we need this healing so much 😭❤️ Thank you.

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад +2

      Thank you! We're so glad you're here with us. So much more for your to dive into here and coming soon.

  • @annereingold9803
    @annereingold9803 9 месяцев назад

    How better a parent I would have been had I heard of Dr. Mate when I was pregnant with my first child in 2001. But it's not too late!

  • @alixptn
    @alixptn Год назад +3

    Totally. You can hear the hurt little boy in Petterson’s voice every time he speaks.

  • @nancyadams4358
    @nancyadams4358 Год назад +1

    Thank you all for being vulnerable really touched my soul. Real Folks💕

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  10 месяцев назад +1

      Thank you. Glad you're here with us.

  • @captkimmy
    @captkimmy Год назад +5

    Thank u guys! This is so sad how our society is hurting! Love me some Gabor

  • @voteutah
    @voteutah Год назад +1

    25 years in elementary education here. Bio major, lifelong science geek, 75 yo.. Gabor for Secretory of education! Now! Globally! A+, as much as I hate grades.

  • @temitopeoluwadunsin2019
    @temitopeoluwadunsin2019 Год назад +3

    Humanity needs more of this

  • @tonirowland4593
    @tonirowland4593 Год назад +1

    Omg I love this man so much a true angel and wish there were more authentic speakers like him x

  • @michaelclark2357
    @michaelclark2357 Год назад +3

    according to the economics I was raised with many uncles and aunts and cousins as a medical chemist and laboratory technician and later a doctoral student of Physics and my last employment was as an Optical Engineer for Perkin-Elmer a defense contractor until it was outsourced to India and Malasia so I do not know how men have any opportunity for work today in this toxic culture great title as Plato says is it truthful and useful thanks for the work on addiction used hallucinogenic, cannabis-c.b.d, opium no ethanol

  • @MonkeyDIvan
    @MonkeyDIvan Год назад

    Dr. Maté is a treasure.

  • @sharonblair907
    @sharonblair907 Год назад +3

    You all did a great job. Gabor is brilliant and you all are very brave.

  • @healingwisdomarts
    @healingwisdomarts Год назад +2

    Harmony 🙏 wen I was lil my moms moms died so I absorbed her sadness my dad gave up music to load trains with news paper with a bad back I absorbed his resentful energy then went to school at 5 was abused by the nuns , at 65 my parents died 2 days apart then my 3 aunts while going thru a horrible divorce , was moved from my home town to live in an apt knowing no one , alone then covid started ,, I felt like I was living in a nkightmear ,,, MY HEART WAS SO BROKEN I COULD NOT TEACH ANYMORE , it was a good day if I got dressed . , I never feel like life is the way God made it to be ,,, so what I do is tell myself this " im alive today make it a wonder filled day " or " im safe right now so relax " im learning to take care of myself at 67 . im still doing the inner work and watching Dr Gabor has helped me begin to understand human nature & myself, he's my north STAR ,, . vids like this one help me not feel like im all alone in this world , So thank you all 🙏

    • @WeAreManEnough
      @WeAreManEnough  Год назад

      Thank you for sharing your experience. Sending you love.