Thankful for this ministry, Mark. I’m a 33 year old man (not quite middle aged haha), super introvert, never dated, still praying for and faithfully trying to take steps to find the right beautiful godly woman (and become the right godly man!!). It’s a hard and confusing season that triggers a lot of doubt. My rallying cry and prayer for myself these days is Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 3:14-19, to know in my KNOWER, how much God loves me, and live out of that identity… that’s hard when He seems silent.
I am forming a habit of saying frequently throughout the day “God loves me and I know it” no matter what it looks like or feels like. So don’t get discouraged! God wants you to live life as a confident, rooted-in-love man, husband, and father even more than *you* do, so keep taking the steps and He will help you (Psalm 37:23) 😊
It’s encouraging seeing your comment. I am a 33 year old Christian woman. It feels like our age is that awkward not very young, not yet middle aged season. It’s nice to see that there are men out here my age waiting for the right one, while becoming a godly future spouse, focusing on God. It gives me hope that I’ll cross paths with the right handsome godly man one day 🕊
@Parker Lewallen Same here, 33y/o and introverted lady. As an introvert it's really hard to meet someone who I can relate with; I know one but he's already married to an extroverted lady😅😊 I tried online dating but still nobody has messaged or taken interest with me, maybe because I wrote "introverted" in my description haha. But I'm not counting much on it. I think everyone will go through questioning ourselves about our singleness once we hit 30 when everyone else has been engaged or married. But now I've reached 33, God is making me realize many things, and that is to enjoy life and service to Him and to His people thru ministry.
In my experience I’ve met so many Christian men who push my boundaries and do not care about purity. They will be extremely forward and say they want to have sex or I find myself trying to keep their hands off me. For now I’m just staying in submission to God and if he’s willing in his time he will make it happen.
One truth people are no longer taught in todays feminist society is on the topic of sexual market value (SMV) which is different for men and women. Women are primarily valued for their you and fertility while men are primarily valued for resource acquisition and leadership.
probably not real Christians. Premarital sex is the basics. If a man doesn't know that is a sin, it's highly likely he's not a real Christian and never reads the Bible
1 Don't try to meet people like a younger person. Be more intentional. 2 Don't use courting principles. 3 Eliminate conflicting desires. When you want everything, oftentimes you end up with nothing. 4 Learn to be more accepting of others and emotionally self-sufficient. Pray about having a healthy acceptance of others. Only Jesus is perfect. 5 Change something. Try another way. 6 Stop Yoyo-dating (being extremely active or extremely passive) 7 Don't get bitter. Keep enjoying your life.
I’m reading through these comments and it helps me feel like I am not alone. I am not the only person going through the challenges of being a single Christian and middle aged. Dating has been frustrating. Even talking to other believers about dating can be frustrating if they have been married for like 30 years and you know they cannot relate to what it’s like dating in 2022. I even get frustrated when someone says “pray about it” and I’m like duh I’m praying about it. Or when someone thinks it’s okay to ask me why I am still single. Anyways so I try to just focus on God and my own personal growth and happiness. For example picking up new hobbies that I’ve always been interested in and traveling
Thank you so much for this video, it really hit the nail on the head. im 41 and sometimes really struggle to connect with your content because it's mostly for a much younger age group. Please do more for us oldies. 🙏
Valuable advice! As a 45 year old single woman (no kids) who went through divorce 14 years ago and is open to marriage again, I know what I want and what I don’t want in a relationship/marriage. It is difficult to find Christian men who are dedicated to Jesus and want to wait until marriage to have sex. It’s important to obey God in this area (and all areas) because it causes so much heartache if/when it doesn’t work out. It’s not worth it to bring sex into the relationship if that person will not marry you. After all these years of seeking God’s will, I still believe that He knows what is best for me and will lead me on the right path, even though it is very challenging. I don’t want to lose hope in my Godly husband finding me, but I need to keep working on my emotional self sufficiency and stability. I’ve come a long way and God is still working on me. Working on improving yourself during the waiting season is key.
I must warn you that the Bible clearly states in three different places that a woman who marries is never allowed to marry another man unless her ex-husband is dead. Jesus said that any man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery and causes her to commit adultery as well. The Apostle Paul reiterates this, saying that a woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive. 1 Corinthians 6:9 guarantees that people who live in adultery WILL NOT be part of the Kingdom of Heaven, so don't do it! Don't forfeit your soul!!
Stop. You have unrightfully thrown out this scripture and you have no idea the details of this situation. It is written that divorce is allowed for sexually immorality....which makes sense because sex joins two as one. Secondly, it is written that if an unbelieving spouse leaves the left behind spouse is no longer under bondage. That makes sense because God has spoken multiple times that two must walk together in agreement. So you can't pull out a scripture out of context like that and blanketly tell a person you have never met what they should do. You've made yourself legalistic and spirit of error has come upon you....and in that you've become a tool of the enemy like the Pharisees. Please don't do that. It hurts people.
I think celibacy is for me. After going through bad sinful relationships with lost women AFTER I was saved, I'm done. I pray for the best for my Christian brothers to find a mate later in life.
I believe that people apply labels to people who are single. It is good if people are in a relationship but we should examine our hearts and be open to God's will for ourselves, and if it is not God's will, we should be content with being single. I believe if we direct our hearts to the Saviour, He knows what is best. We should not ridicule those who like being single everything we do is to please our Lord and Savior Jesus.
I’m 63 and a fantastic lady was introduced to me by mutual friends whom we had both known for decades. She could not possibly be more perfect for me, and she says the same about me. Our mutual friends have all vouched for us to each other and confirmed that we should have been together many years ago.
I'm a 38 year old woman who was briefly married and divorced long back. I kept trying and doing all the right things I thought would help me find the right partner. It was an utterly painful process. I never got close to someone who could be a potential partner. But this jan I finally clicked with someone who I met on an online site. I truly believe God blessed this for me. As it just flowed naturally and I dint have to push it or worry about it. There is a thing that God's timing is on spot. Everything I did previously dint work. The minute i prayed and said I'm not going to worry about this, I'll wait for you to tell me- everything fell into place. I know how painful waiting can be, but God does wonders and surprises us a lot.
Same here for nine years, and met someone from my past. May or not work out, but enjoyable sharing hymn videos, humor and encouragement to stay in God's word.
Thank you for this message. I needed to hear this. I'm still looking in the same ways I was when I was 20... but I'm over 50 now. I need to change methods. This has blessed me. 🙌🏽
This was a great video. You really understand the challenges us middle-aged singles experience. Great tips and really good to live by. So many people are quick to tell you pray about it or just give up marriage is not everything. I tell them if you want something pray and be intentional and put forth work. Only other tip would be don't let anyone make you feel bad about being single or wanting to have a partner.
I gave up trying to find a relationship last year. Every time I tried, I was miserable. I can't date. So I stopped trying, and I felt great. I have peace. I live by myself now and enjoy the hobbies and activities I like.
They say it happens when you stop paying attention. It's better to have a relaxed vibe and with that I lost count of how many Male acquaintances I have had along the way. I have made some friends, but in our Modern Day it is tough to admit if I am supposed to just live a Single Life that makes me available to more people with Christian love. It would be great to have a good life partner, but I wait because I can do bad all by myself.
After losing my husband more than two years ago and opening up with meeting people again I realized that dating over 40 is not the same when I was in my 20s. And the dating scene has changed as well. But because of my experience from my late husband to be loved and loved unconditionally I could incorporate that experience when I meet new men that could potentially be my future husband. Most importantly, I am putting God in control with all my decisions in my life. For now, I’m enjoying my singleness and develop great quality relationships. I don’t want to waste my time just moping around and be bitter because I’m sure my late husband in heaven would want me to be happy and follow my calling while I’m still here in this planet earth ❤😊..
I've prayed to God a lot. He's revealed so much to me over these 6 months. One thing He told me to do is to stop worrying about getting married and having children! He said I'm doing the right thing and I'm on the right path: read my Bible, keep praying, keep building a relationship with Him and His Son, keep going out dates, keep being open with your feelings. So whenever I get upset, I just think of what God told me.
Great Video Brother Mark 🥰 I’ve been a widow 4 many years & haven’t dated 4 Eons 🤦🏾♀️Smile I’ve learned many many lessons over the years & I pray 🙏🏽 that the lessons God needed me 2 learn will can one ☝🏽 day I can GLORIFY HIM‼️ I come with Love ❤️ Understanding lots of Patients & Gratitude & Will Stand Beside My Future Husband ALWAYS‼️ No fussing because life’s 2 short…kinda like me Smiles 😁 (I’m short) But Mighty ❤️💕❤️ Stay Blessed Always Everyone ❤️☮️❤️☮️ 🙏🏽🙏🏼🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️‼️
Never count God out. My friend lost her husband of 45 years about two years ago. Me and another friend used to go over their house for Bible study on Tuesday evenings. December 2021 she was still single and not doing well with online dating. She met a lot of duds. By April 2022 i'm attending her wedding with her British husband who was a reverend and, owns his own business in Britain which is where they are living now. To rewind a little on her life. She is the daughter of missionaries. and, has a cousin that already lives in Britain. Now she is in her mid 70's and her husband in his 80's.
Great idea! This is important as so many of us are on a roller coaster of emotions relating to trying to find our one. Learning to manage these emotions sometimes feels like a parttime job! I know when I start to become frustrated I pray and read the bible. Infact, I starting reading my bible systematically to ward off these feelings. And having a close network of Christian friends really helps and being involved in the church that’s what I’m really trying to build on! God bless us all as we search for our mate in Christ😊❤✝️🙏🏻
I want to comment but I end up writing too much. So all I can say is thank you, God bless, and praying that we all find God's will for us both in marriage and our entire lives.
I love your content, Mark. I began listening to it, because I'm 59-years old and have a friendship developing with a older gentleman. We are definitely spiritually compatible for sure. As I've listened to you, this gentleman 'is' taking all the appropriate steps that you have listed in many of your videos. However, he's just been diagnosed with prostate cancer and refuses to go any further in the relationship, until he finds out what the outcome is. It has bonded us in our friendship even more though. This has changed my whole perspective on any form of relationship in what is 'important' and what is not. Life is way too short to live arguing, being caught up in petty things, not serving God together, and loving eachother as He loves us. Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, but what I do know is that I will live each day, (as if it was my last), with my friend making memories to hold on to should he cross over.
Prayers for healing in Jesus Name. This is a good time to put faith in GOD and prayer about counting the relationship and given a chance to walk in faith and not fear. Praying 🙏✨
My ex father in law had prostate cancer. He went into remission 15 years. If this man loves you and the Lord. If you can cope with diagnosis he should propose. He sounds fearful.
I'm so happy you addressed the traditional view of courting and how that does not apply to us older folk. I think back to when we were 18 they told us to go out only in groups of friends, go have pizza together etc. Then you and the person you were sweet on would be making eyes at each other across the table. Lol.
We have different “seasons” in life. Being single for a while after divorce is one we may face. As you say, I think it’s important to learn to be self-sufficient and happy in your singleness before committing to another person. Otherwise, you’ll just end-up being codependent.
This is a good point but it is really scary. I married at age 20. I am 45 now. I never learned how to change my oil or a tire or mow the lawn or fix things around the house. Now I am in a position where I am getting a divorce due to my husband's infidelity. I am so so scared to do life on my own.
Great advice. It's tough being single, but I'll keep trusting the Lord. I agree with the part about being intentional. Otherwise, there's a good chance nothing will happen.
Thank you for this great video. The timing could not have been better given how God has been speaking to me lately. Being single and never married at 50...has been a Struggle for me. There's a decision I need to make. Either I can stay miserable (and alone) over how nothing in my life up to this point has led to marriage, or I can choose to explore and change some things while trusting God to work things out. Blessings-
Pray, and get to church where you can study the Bible in a group setting, make Christian friends, fellowship, and let God lead the way. These things will bring you joy! I'm 59, never married and there is so much I've learned from God, scripture, these videos (Mark)... But it's all for my betterment. Be faithful and trust our Father!
Thank you so much for this message. I needed this. Funny thing is everything I thought was what I should do, you said it’s not good to do. I guess I am now considered middle aged at 48🫤. I spent 20 years of my life in an abusive, sinful relationship that the Lord used to break me. After 3 years by myself I honestly don’t know if I want to be bothered anymore. It just seem as if there is no godly men out here. I know my desire is to become married before I leave this earth. Praying that the Lord gives me a husband some day soon.
Very sound biblical and reasonable advice. I was a successful movie producer and became disabled (albeit am walking again and am showing improvement over the past decade) and I have a 15 yr old son who's dad passed away and is with the Lord since my boy was 9 years old. I never dated anyone bc I did not want my son to be confused about having any male figure that he would fear is trying to replace his daddy. I chose to raise him alone with the men in his life, influencing him being his grandaddy, uncle and pastor. I own my own home pif and have no financial need nor desire to be takrn care of, however as my son gets closer to being a young man, I consider maybe dating someone to have companionship. I am not sure what my expectations should be as I never considered ever marrying or even dating, but I've considered this lately. Even if I don't move forward with that, this advice was very sound. Thank you
Very helpful video! Very respectful, non-judgmental! Is a very delicate subject for me. Being single at 40 and praying and waiting on God, I have tried online. But still haven’t met anyone that speak my interest.
Thanks Mark for this video. I am 32 and pursuing my studies in Theology I am starting to be be intentional , and let God be God. Sometimes just relaxing and waiting for something I do not know when it will come can be exhausting ... Do not lose hope fam ❤😊
Everything is in God's timing and we must learn to wait patiently on the Lord, And if marriage is your desire then pray to the Lord continuously.. But at the same time we must be aware of: *Know that the Lord has set apart his faithful servant for himself* the Lord hears when I call to him. Psalms 4:3 NIV
All I want to do is love my wife from God. My heart is torn. But God never guaranteed happiness for me in this world. God bless you all brothers and sisters. We all need to love each other. Especially many of us who have nobody
Thank you for the video I was widowed at 52 its been a gut punch and after 2 yrs tried dating its been a nightmare..Ive really been asking the lord why 3 yrs Im so lonely and depressed..Im praying for my Boaz every day Idont know why the lord is allowing this ..please pray for me
I’ve been following you for a while listening to everything, this was one that hit me because I’m 50 although I don’t look like I’m 50. I got really turned off to love recently because I just feel I’m not attracting the right people for me and I am a Christian woman. I kind of gave up on love because it just seems like I can’t find the right man for me mainly a man who loves the Lord. Divorced once and have one grown child and the other still raising. So I completely understand this video I think we need to approach it differently yet I still feel as if it’s hopeless and looking on dating sites I just get so disappointed. I’m not sure if I should Forget about love or ever finding a second chance to be married. They’re slim pickings out there….
The words ‘hopeless’, and ‘forget about love’..have strong connotations. I’m 51 been divorced for a long time. I’ve dated for years, and all that entails. Always searching for that someone to complete me. Until one day 4 years ago when the Holy Spirit told me loud and clear, enough. I stopped. It took a while to completely get off all dating sites. To let go of that urge to look for whatever we want to call it..love, happiness etc..I focused on what Jesus tells us instead. On what’s written in the Bible. On Gods honest truth. We can never escape the consequences of our actions but we can be forgiven. We can choose to take the next step in our lives, either closer to the truth or further from it. The truth, as it is said, is what sets us free. Don’t get me wrong..I still feel it would be really nice to have a partner again sometimes. But only if it were right the Lords eyes. I know I can’t afford to make any other mistakes..and if not, I am content in the love of the Father, the Son and the Spirit. They fill our lives more than any other person ever could. My life is far from perfect but I’m so grateful to be where I’m at right now. It’s not easy to write a message like this without sounding like a Bible thumping loudmouth or holier than thou person..or some other cliché.. the flesh is always going to fight against the spirit though. To want what it wants. Keep your eyes high, focus on Jesus, read the word. It’ll give you strength.
I am a Believer and a True Born again Christian Man 👨 I hear you loud and clear Been on dating sites and active in the church and business world 🌎 Very difficult to find someone who lives the Christian life and practices it Be true to God and yourself during this season of life Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
Thank you so much for this video. I’m not quite hitting 40 but I will be in a couple of years. I am grateful for this ministry. You know, there are not many churches who have a ministry for single people. Most ministries are for married couples, children, seniors, men and women which I guess maybe singles could fall under that category but you never see a ministry for singles. Thanks again, Mark. I have learned so much from you, your channel and your latest book.
I am 62, and my last two relationships ended with them cheating on me. They both claimed to be Christians, came from Christian homes, and both were sons of pastors. So I am not seeking a relationship, I am leaving it in Gods hands. I am O.K. with remaining single, and I think it is what God wants as well. I feel that if God wants me to have a Christian man, he will bring him into my life, but after those last two; I will not be easily fooled again. 😊
In about 2 weeks I will be attending a church retreat where I will get to meet new people from different levels of their faith journey. This is the most "proactive" venture that I can muster (for now) as I am very much introverted and not really putting myself "out there". Although my main reason for joining this event is to learn about the biblical perspective on work, I am secretly praying that this will be a venue for me to eventually meet my future spouse (lol). Nevertheless, please pray for and with me on this. Whatever God has planned as I join this event, may it come to pass for His glory.
A lot of people who are middle aged and single are either widowed or divorced. Very few have not been married unless they were in a long term relationship but never married. Love your videos they are always on point however divorce is not an unforgivable sin and I believe once someone gives their life to Christ even after a divorce, God can send them someone who is on the right track and like they are striving to be.
Jesus clearly said that a man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery and causes her to commit adultery. The Apostle Paul echoes this, saying that a woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. The Bible warns in 1 Corinthians 6:9 that whoever lives in adultery WILL NOT inherit the Kingdom of Heaven, so if you as a divorced woman marry someone else while your ex-husband is alive, God considers that a serious enough offense to turn you away from Heaven. Be warned! It's not worth losing your soul for this.
@@selohcinPlease read in context. If cheating or abandonment by an unbeliever happens, divorce and remarriage is allowed for the innocent. Because if that's the case of these blanket statements, no man who divorces his wife should EVER get remarried or have any nee relationship. He should stay single forever. But that rarely happens, right? God is a loving God and is aware of more than we'll ever know. In that passage, it's about a man casting his wife away and she's done nothing sexually, nor he. In that time, men were divorcing for any reason. Jesus was saying under those circumstances, EXCEPT SEXUAL IMMORALITY, the woman was still his wife. He couldn't just cast her off for gaining weight, for example. But if he did, he'd be causing her to commit adultery if she is taken up by another man because the marriage bond was not sexually violated until new man comes into play. The emphasis is still FIRST that the man caused her to sin if he divorces her for random reasons. The man is still greatly accountable for what happens to that woman, except if sexual immorality were involved. Sex outside of a marriage union makes a person unclean and God said we cannot be unclean. That's why sexual immorality is allowed. If there is none, then to break up a marriage between two "clean" people God hates. So a man causing his "clean" wife to end up in the arms of another man does make her commit a dirty act. The man she married commits it, too. But.....,there is Jesus. EVERYTHING is forgivable except blasphemy. Jesus says to go and sin no more. Do not cause another divorce, but live moving forward in Christ.
Thank you for this. I'm 37. I was saved unequally yoked unmarried at 35 so became single. I have two young children and it's really hard to meet anyone as I'm with my children and only go to my church where other Christians are. I've tried some dating apps that are Christian but I found most aren't even Christian on them. I definitely need to be more consistent. 😂😬😬
Agreed, but... let's always remember we can't do anything about height, but "waist size", as you put it, can be managed and the person's complete responsability.
This is really true. I'm single and in my early 40s and actively working on my health and appearance. I think it's wrong for women to fall into the easy trap of letting themselves get very overweight and obese. Many will claim to desire marriage but dismiss the physical element of attractiveness.
That was a great last point you know just enjoy your life don't get better or upset. I'm 33 not quite middle-aged I tried online dating through the last 4 or 5 years because I usually find myself attracted to women from other countries just hasn't worked out I figured it could because we serve a God that can do anything but my last experience God just showed me this is not the way that you're going to get this done son so I stopped. I'm open to whatever he has for me whatever his will is I still believe I'm meant to get married because when I meet someone new I'm excited to meet them especially if they're single or when I see a child it fills my heart up with an expectation of one day I might have a child of my own. So I keep going on and Hope doing my best working in teenage ministry to help other young boys and young women and just keeping a hopeful heart faithful heart. Thanks for the videos mark.
Mark, thank you for what I call "balanced wisdom." This is greatly needed because a lot of singles put themselves in a box when it comes to the issues you're describing. I commend you for your willingness to help singles. I'm in my 41st year of serving the Lord. I have grown children--but they suffered growing up because it's a rarity to find a church that has a ministry for singles, single parents, and their children. I hope you have many opportunities to encourage pastors to begin a singles ministry. You are a blessing! I'm on your email list and I'd like to know how to make a donation to your ministry. Jeremiah 32:27--I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for me?
Really great advice in this video. Starting with being intentional about meeting people. How important is it to "meet people" especially to those of us who are "middle age" or little bit past middle age 🤭. It could be the change that is needed.
Mark you are so right about people wanting the whole package , and then never meet them ,but overlook the one that is lacking a couple things, I met my 2 husband on line and he was shorter than me, but most of the 7 years I was with him(he died in 2019) was honestly the best years of my life.i kept thinking what I would of missed if I turned, him down because of his height.,and that also goes for how men want a ten of a woman,when if you made the effort to get to know a five,she's just as good or better.anyway thankyou for saying that.
@Tyler Lee I think my difficulty comes from meeting men who are not in the same season as me. They’re similar in age, but maybe not emotionally available, or think somehow I’m “ahead” of them in life. Also, God’s timing! If he wanted it to be so, he would align it. I’m also doing my part by putting myself out there to position myself for that timing ⏱😊 That’s sadly something I keep hearing abt (online Christian groups)with single Christian’s lately, that they’re not willing to wait for marriage (although I haven’t met anyone in person that thinks this way).
I'm 47, divorced twice, two kids. I gave my heart to Jesus when I as 19, but never noticed radical change in my walk (very slow and gradual changes) and made countless mistakes through the years. About three months, as if I was knocked off my horse like Paul was, my faith drastically changed with a teary eyed reflection on my past 20 plus years. I re-gave my life to Christ, all of it, full surrender. Immediately, something changed in me. My desire to follow Jesus was intense, I hated my old lifestyle (all of it), I have strived and been successful at being super obedient, denying myself, praying consistently, reading scripture, etc. It has taken a whole new level and people close to me have taken notice. I feel very completely different than before. So here in lies my dilemma. I have been dating a wonderful woman for two years, she is incredible is so many ways except that her Christian faith is on par with what mine was 2 years ago, somewhat lukewarm. I'm faced with a decision on whether to stay with her or leave her. I was planning to propose to her, but now with all my recent changes, I'm beyond stressed. I am fearful to lose her, yet fearful we are not spiritually on equal joke. Welcome any advice...
What is her reaction to these changes in you? Therein lies the answer. If she's open, responding positively, even if it's a muted response, I would say there is hope. If she's responding in an aggressive or negative manner, I would say that there is no future in the relationship. Keep praying about it. Most likely the Lord has already revealed the answer to you.
@@KB-jo8ld Thank you KB, very good advice. I would say she views me like an alien took me, so that is telling alone. I will keep praying and make a decision soon, hoping for a miracle.
@@danielrblend this might also be something to fast about. One word of warning I would say: if she will be a detriment to your walk with the Lord, it's better to gouge out your eye. Painful in the short term but the Lord would bless you for it. I say that fully admitting that there are things in my life that I have yet to surrender fully. But your partner would have an ability to damage your walk like no other thing. All the best with your decision Brother :)
@@danielrblend any wisdom I have given you is from the Lord :) but definitely pray about it because my sinful cynical heart could be in there too. God bless you :)
I firmly encourage to find someone attractive to you like you said. If people chose ppl like that there would be less husbands with impure gaze and wives that taint the reputation of these women that are'nt interested in their spouses. Thank you for these advices🙏🏼
So much good sense and wisdom in this series of videos, loving this! Am in early 40's where previous relationships have not worked and were long term but not with Christians (I didn't think it was the issue but maybe it contributed as I've never wavered in my Christian belief...but my parents were 2 different faiths one catholic one totally different and they worked out) so I appreciate the advice here because the 'rules' other people have told me haven't worked.
Honestly, i dont think being a couple is as critical to contentment as we get told it is. Im 52, divorced, no kids. Not sure i ever want to marry again but I sure would LOVE a group of fun and faithful Christian women to pal around with! Even that is tough to find after college...
I'm 59 and widowed. Been with the same man 32yrs. Talk about it being tough! Most men just want sex... even those who know the Bible and know how to worship. Very difficult dating in these times. Prayers for all of us. Thank you for the video. Great information.
I’m only 27 but that man I love is 39. He was hurt in a past relationship and is jaded. He doesn’t want marriage or commitment. The sad thing is that he’s in love with me too but we dance around our feelings for each other😞
Please pray for me. I have been far from God and backsliding. I entered a relationship with a non believer out of frustration of being single in my 30s. It ended in heartbreak today bc of infidelity. I need God’s grace and perspective and Him to bring healing so I don’t fall into despair. I appreciate any prayer 🙏🏼
Brother, have you any Biblical guidance for seniors who are single and want to find a follower of Christ for marriage? Thank you for your work and videos. May God bless your ministry and family.
Singleness as we know it can last our entire earthly lives at worst, but our earthly lives are actually relatively short. Time flies faster and faster every year. That may sound morbid to you but I hope it's a source of comfort if you really think about it. None of us knows how long will be alive on earth for and it's best to focus on enjoying every day for what it is instead of continually morning what you don't have. Time is short.
I had a man come into my office and a voice said, " This is your husband". I have not dated for years... not even thinking about a man. But, I was confused. I thought, " Is this a sign from God?" I tried to be obedient, but finding a mate right now was not on my radar. As I began to ponder if there was "something" there, I began finding faults. Maybe his eyes are too close or his ears are too big. And then I felt this immense shame come over me. Who do I think I am!!! Not in a relationship and I am already trying to sabotage it. I have to protect my heart somehow. If this is my blessing, I just threw it back at God. How do you give back a gift that God has given you? Wow. Forgive me God.
I jumped through a lot of hurdles: an unwanted move of continents at 28-years-old, a few jobs, one that kinda kept me trapped in a tough schedule, and at 35 got a breast cancer diagnosis. Now at 39 almost 40, after months of chemo, years of oral meds, I could never be the same person anymore. Plus, living in an Asian busy city where singles don't just land in our house of prayer very often. So anything conventional at 25-years-old might not apply anymore, after going through so much. Circumstances have been the way they have, and it's not necessarily related to the way I relate to people. Well, if anyone would show up in my city and in our house of prayer just like that, even getting local ID docs and becoming a legal citizen would be an issue, but sure wouldn't be like 21-year-old people meeting each other. As we age, I think things change, and I get it: it's love we're talking about, and God is not a tyrant. Free will is huge here! Something that hit me recently and caused me to think is the fact that I just assumed throughout these 11 years that people don't come to a city like the one I live in looking for the kind of marriage where Christ is involved, and I'm just talking demographics, but I would be very caught by surprised if the Lord was to put someone in front of me where I am, a situation that would only show myself how my presumptions are unprepared to deal with a person who might happen to be new in church AND new in Asia and new in the city, who might even need guidance from a local. And yeah, it just happened the way I described. Lord please help me help someone now. 😅😂 Not only that, but the person whom I seem to have so much in common with, whose age is so close to mine has lost a close relative back in their home in a very far continent, a few days ago. I really do believe I'd like to help the person settle and be a good company to this person. I happen to speak his language and I taught myself his accent because of my school BFF who is from his country, and it's not like I'm one of those Asians desperate for a westerner and trying to make a local ID card offer. I happen to be half Asian, tending to the western side, so the stereotype wouldn't apply. 😂
I have been single since August of 1993. I have dated women and hit dead ends. A lot of it was my fault. I haven't even tried to date since 2011. At this stage of my life, I think it has become moot. I am 70 and retired. I don't view myself as having much of a future. I will do what I can for my children and grandchildren. I do want to build relationships but I don't see anything beyond friendships for me.
Thought i'd share a personal story. I don't know what God has planned for you or if He is leading you down another path. Never count God out. My friend lost her husband of 45 years about two years ago. Me and another friend used to go over their house for Bible study on Tuesday evenings. December 2021 she was still single and not doing well with online dating. She met a lot of duds. By April 2022 i'm attending her wedding with her British husband who was a reverend and, owns his own business in Britain which is where they are living now. To rewind a little on her life. She is the daughter of missionaries. and, has a cousin that already lives in Britain. Now she is in her mid 70's and her husband in his 80's.
You’re still alive so you definitely have much of a future! God planned and wrote all your days before you were even born (Psalm 139:16). You have a purpose-a specific reason why God needs you on this Earth. Don’t let your age hinder you in any way. Moses was 80 when he led the Israelites out of Egypt. Abraham was “well advanced in age” and still married a second time after Sarah died. If you shift your thinking to “I will get married again” then you enable God to fulfil that desire in your life! 😇
Thank You for Sharing I am 65 and circumstances have made me wonder if there is a possible future out there Still working and healthy and active Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
34, here! Only briefly dated once (not really serious), still waiting. But I think I need to put myself out there a little more. I am getting antsy and restless. I think I do need to change something and get out more.
As he stated, you can do all these things and still be single. If you're middle aged and watched every single person around you get married and you're STILL single... Its by God's doing... Not yours. God is sovereign and providential and he has the power to run you into whomever it is that he has pre-ordained for you to marry... Whether its at church, work, the grocery store or the gym 🤷🏾♀️ If it hasn't happened... Don't be hard on yourself... Its a part of God's unknown plan.
Yes. The Lord's ways are higher than ours. I feel blessed to remember that in heaven, we will all be more closely connected to each other than the best relationship on earth. So, whether we get married down here or not, in the next life, we all win.
Considering what I've done with my free will in the past, I'm content (mostly), to give God the wheel and count in Him to create my love story. So far He's working wonderful things in my life.
Lots and lots of people die unmarried. God lets a lot of Christians die unwed. He's not obligated to send everyone a spouse and the Bible never promises it. God is not just up there making matches and doing nothing else.
God in His sovereignty allows people to make mistakes and screw up their lives. Stupid passivity and refusing to take necessary action can produce horrific lifelong consequences He won't shield you from. In His sovereignty He creates ugly, repulsive awkward people because He has preordained, they spend their lives alone. My great aunt was homely and eccentric. Died unwed at 90.
Because of the destruction of family, religion, and no provided direction for either the average person or believer in the West they have been left to simply “figure things out on their own”. Feminism has conned the general populace into believing there are no differences between men and women and that males preferences for a mate simply don’t matter. In my opinion churches should be involved in vetting young people for marriage (if that’s what they wish to pursue), such as providing a true matching service rather than providing counseling after the couple has already decided to marry. This passive mentality of families and churches has led to this situation of sheer directionlessness in mate selection.
That’s the issue a lot of men attracted to me are in there early or middle 30’s or a little over 40. They are either leaving a marriage or getting out a relationship. I’m 40 and divorced for over 5 years and a certified mental health life coach
Thankful for this ministry, Mark. I’m a 33 year old man (not quite middle aged haha), super introvert, never dated, still praying for and faithfully trying to take steps to find the right beautiful godly woman (and become the right godly man!!). It’s a hard and confusing season that triggers a lot of doubt. My rallying cry and prayer for myself these days is Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 3:14-19, to know in my KNOWER, how much God loves me, and live out of that identity… that’s hard when He seems silent.
I am forming a habit of saying frequently throughout the day “God loves me and I know it” no matter what it looks like or feels like. So don’t get discouraged! God wants you to live life as a confident, rooted-in-love man, husband, and father even more than *you* do, so keep taking the steps and He will help you (Psalm 37:23) 😊
It’s encouraging seeing your comment. I am a 33 year old Christian woman. It feels like our age is that awkward not very young, not yet middle aged season. It’s nice to see that there are men out here my age waiting for the right one, while becoming a godly future spouse, focusing on God. It gives me hope that I’ll cross paths with the right handsome godly man one day 🕊
@@christinelong2407 I say that to myself and my womb. I say that my womb is blessed.
My advice is to just push yourself and try something new. It get's easier the more you do it!
@Parker Lewallen Same here, 33y/o and introverted lady. As an introvert it's really hard to meet someone who I can relate with; I know one but he's already married to an extroverted lady😅😊
I tried online dating but still nobody has messaged or taken interest with me, maybe because I wrote "introverted" in my description haha. But I'm not counting much on it.
I think everyone will go through questioning ourselves about our singleness once we hit 30 when everyone else has been engaged or married. But now I've reached 33, God is making me realize many things, and that is to enjoy life and service to Him and to His people thru ministry.
In my experience I’ve met so many Christian men who push my boundaries and do not care about purity. They will be extremely forward and say they want to have sex or I find myself trying to keep their hands off me. For now I’m just staying in submission to God and if he’s willing in his time he will make it happen.
One truth people are no longer taught in todays feminist society is on the topic of sexual market value (SMV) which is different for men and women. Women are primarily valued for their you and fertility while men are primarily valued for resource acquisition and leadership.
probably not real Christians. Premarital sex is the basics. If a man doesn't know that is a sin, it's highly likely he's not a real Christian and never reads the Bible
Church guys , some not all, are just as worst as unbelievers. No difference at all almost in this generation.
Very wise decision!
From all of my experience, I do believe there are more Christian woman than men.
1 Don't try to meet people like a younger person. Be more intentional.
2 Don't use courting principles.
3 Eliminate conflicting desires. When you want everything, oftentimes you end up with nothing.
4 Learn to be more accepting of others and emotionally self-sufficient.
Pray about having a healthy acceptance of others. Only Jesus is perfect.
5 Change something. Try another way.
6 Stop Yoyo-dating (being extremely active or extremely passive)
7 Don't get bitter. Keep enjoying your life.
I’m reading through these comments and it helps me feel like I am not alone. I am not the only person going through the challenges of being a single Christian and middle aged. Dating has been frustrating. Even talking to other believers about dating can be frustrating if they have been married for like 30 years and you know they cannot relate to what it’s like dating in 2022. I even get frustrated when someone says “pray about it” and I’m like duh I’m praying about it. Or when someone thinks it’s okay to ask me why I am still single. Anyways so I try to just focus on God and my own personal growth and happiness. For example picking up new hobbies that I’ve always been interested in and traveling
What infuriates names when other women tell me maybe God wants you to be alone but then they're going home with their husbands😡
I am 61 and single. Very difficult at this age to find a man who has worked on their issues and are willing to get married again. Very heart breaking.
❤
🙏🤍
Truth
🙏🤍
Most men will never remarry if divorced. It is very difficult. Prayers for us 🙏
Thank you so much for this video, it really hit the nail on the head. im 41 and sometimes really struggle to connect with your content because it's mostly for a much younger age group. Please do more for us oldies. 🙏
So glad you found this helpful :)
Am also 34 single mother of one boy buh believing God for a Godly loving respectful man
I find that I can see hope from those videos but you’re right on this also
I'm 41 too and need more content for people our age.
Thank you for this much needed message. It's tough being single and hoping for marriage when you're over 40! Amen
You are so welcome, so glad it was helpful!
P4:8 your not alone. I'm 62 never been married. Yet I have that burning desire for that Proverbs 31 wife.
Ditto!!! Tho I must admit I'm not keen on the term middle-aged!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHH!!!!!!
@@vincentortega4284 hmuuu have u found one now
still praying for that blessed wife.
Valuable advice! As a 45 year old single woman (no kids) who went through divorce 14 years ago and is open to marriage again, I know what I want and what I don’t want in a relationship/marriage. It is difficult to find Christian men who are dedicated to Jesus and want to wait until marriage to have sex. It’s important to obey God in this area (and all areas) because it causes so much heartache if/when it doesn’t work out. It’s not worth it to bring sex into the relationship if that person will not marry you. After all these years of seeking God’s will, I still believe that He knows what is best for me and will lead me on the right path, even though it is very challenging. I don’t want to lose hope in my Godly husband finding me, but I need to keep working on my emotional self sufficiency and stability. I’ve come a long way and God is still working on me. Working on improving yourself during the waiting season is key.
I must warn you that the Bible clearly states in three different places that a woman who marries is never allowed to marry another man unless her ex-husband is dead. Jesus said that any man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery and causes her to commit adultery as well. The Apostle Paul reiterates this, saying that a woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive. 1 Corinthians 6:9 guarantees that people who live in adultery WILL NOT be part of the Kingdom of Heaven, so don't do it! Don't forfeit your soul!!
Stop. You have unrightfully thrown out this scripture and you have no idea the details of this situation. It is written that divorce is allowed for sexually immorality....which makes sense because sex joins two as one. Secondly, it is written that if an unbelieving spouse leaves the left behind spouse is no longer under bondage. That makes sense because God has spoken multiple times that two must walk together in agreement. So you can't pull out a scripture out of context like that and blanketly tell a person you have never met what they should do. You've made yourself legalistic and spirit of error has come upon you....and in that you've become a tool of the enemy like the Pharisees. Please don't do that. It hurts people.
I think celibacy is for me. After going through bad sinful relationships with lost women AFTER I was saved, I'm done. I pray for the best for my Christian brothers to find a mate later in life.
Singleness is a high calling too :)
I've gone years without being in romance with someone.
I believe that people apply labels to people who are single. It is good if people are in a relationship but we should examine our hearts and be open to God's will for ourselves, and if it is not God's will, we should be content with being single. I believe if we direct our hearts to the Saviour, He knows what is best. We should not ridicule those who like being single everything we do is to please our Lord and Savior Jesus.
Middle Age is the ages of 45 to 65. Love can be found in Any stage!!⭐❤️⭐👑🎉✌️❤️⭐
aww, maybe God change your desire.
I’m 63 and a fantastic lady was introduced to me by mutual friends whom we had both known for decades. She could not possibly be more perfect for me, and she says the same about me. Our mutual friends have all vouched for us to each other and confirmed that we should have been together many years ago.
In many years of being single going through several Churches this has NEVER happened to me...congrats
Best best wishes!!!
Did you propose?
I'm a 38 year old woman who was briefly married and divorced long back. I kept trying and doing all the right things I thought would help me find the right partner. It was an utterly painful process. I never got close to someone who could be a potential partner. But this jan I finally clicked with someone who I met on an online site. I truly believe God blessed this for me. As it just flowed naturally and I dint have to push it or worry about it. There is a thing that God's timing is on spot. Everything I did previously dint work. The minute i prayed and said I'm not going to worry about this, I'll wait for you to tell me- everything fell into place. I know how painful waiting can be, but God does wonders and surprises us a lot.
God bless!
Same here for nine years, and met someone from my past. May or not work out, but enjoyable sharing hymn videos, humor and encouragement to stay in God's word.
Thank you for this message. I needed to hear this. I'm still looking in the same ways I was when I was 20... but I'm over 50 now. I need to change methods. This has blessed me. 🙌🏽
So glad this was helpful! All glory to God!
Hi there I know how you feel it's been a struggle for me since my husband passed away I'm In my fifties and it's been my struggle
This was a great video. You really understand the challenges us middle-aged singles experience. Great tips and really good to live by. So many people are quick to tell you pray about it or just give up marriage is not everything. I tell them if you want something pray and be intentional and put forth work. Only other tip would be don't let anyone make you feel bad about being single or wanting to have a partner.
I gave up trying to find a relationship last year. Every time I tried, I was miserable. I can't date. So I stopped trying, and I felt great. I have peace. I live by myself now and enjoy the hobbies and activities I like.
Wow, good for you! I wish that worked for me! haha I could never have genuine peace just deciding to not try.
@@selohcin We all have different personalities and interests. My personality is one that prefers solo living.
They say it happens when you stop paying attention. It's better to have a relaxed vibe and with that I lost count of how many Male acquaintances I have had along the way. I have made some friends, but in our Modern Day it is tough to admit if I am supposed to just live a Single Life that makes me available to more people with Christian love. It would be great to have a good life partner, but I wait because I can do bad all by myself.
@@cathymartel9397 That's a great strategy if you're a woman, but it's completely ineffective as a man.
@@selohcin There's no strategy here. I plan on remaining single permanently. Dating is not for me.
Thanks for looking out for Gen Xers
Isn't it crazy how we got skipped over in the world? People talk about boomers and zelennials, but never GenX
@@P4Eight Absolutely! So true...
I got you :)
@@P4Eight yes, it’s a shame. We’re a happy, prosperous, dependent and reasonable bunch. We’re the diamonds in the rough
Hi! Thanks for thinking of us. We are an amazing, resourceful bunch!
After losing my husband more than two years ago and opening up with meeting people again I realized that dating over 40 is not the same when I was in my 20s. And the dating scene has changed as well. But because of my experience from my late husband to be loved and loved unconditionally I could incorporate that experience when I meet new men that could potentially be my future husband. Most importantly, I am putting God in control with all my decisions in my life. For now, I’m enjoying my singleness and develop great quality relationships. I don’t want to waste my time just moping around and be bitter because I’m sure my late husband in heaven would want me to be happy and follow my calling while I’m still here in this planet earth ❤😊..
I've prayed to God a lot. He's revealed so much to me over these 6 months. One thing He told me to do is to stop worrying about getting married and having children! He said I'm doing the right thing and I'm on the right path: read my Bible, keep praying, keep building a relationship with Him and His Son, keep going out dates, keep being open with your feelings. So whenever I get upset, I just think of what God told me.
Ditto❤
Great Video Brother
Mark 🥰
I’ve been a widow 4
many years & haven’t
dated 4 Eons 🤦🏾♀️Smile
I’ve learned many many lessons over the years & I pray 🙏🏽 that the lessons God
needed me 2 learn will can one ☝🏽 day I can GLORIFY HIM‼️
I come with Love ❤️
Understanding lots of
Patients & Gratitude &
Will Stand Beside My
Future Husband ALWAYS‼️ No fussing because life’s
2 short…kinda like me
Smiles 😁 (I’m short)
But Mighty ❤️💕❤️
Stay Blessed Always
Everyone ❤️☮️❤️☮️
🙏🏽🙏🏼🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️‼️
God bless you too Diana and thank you for sharing this
Never count God out. My friend lost her husband of 45 years about two years ago. Me and another friend used to go over their house for Bible study on Tuesday evenings. December 2021 she was still single and not doing well with online dating. She met a lot of duds. By April 2022 i'm attending her wedding with her British husband who was a reverend and, owns his own business in Britain which is where they are living now. To rewind a little on her life. She is the daughter of missionaries. and, has a cousin that already lives in Britain. Now she is in her mid 70's and her husband in his 80's.
@@BossSpringsteen69 this is very encouraging
Mark, can you please make a video about dealing with our emotions as singles while we are waiting?
Great idea! This is important as so many of us are on a roller coaster of emotions relating to trying to find our one.
Learning to manage these emotions sometimes feels like a parttime job! I know when I start to become frustrated I pray and read the bible. Infact, I starting reading my bible systematically to ward off these feelings. And having a close network of Christian friends really helps and being involved in the church that’s what I’m really trying to build on! God bless us all as we search for our mate in Christ😊❤✝️🙏🏻
I want to comment but I end up writing too much. So all I can say is thank you, God bless, and praying that we all find God's will for us both in marriage and our entire lives.
I love your content, Mark. I began listening to it, because I'm 59-years old and have a friendship developing with a older gentleman. We are definitely spiritually compatible for sure.
As I've listened to you, this gentleman 'is' taking all the appropriate steps that you have listed in many of your videos.
However, he's just been diagnosed with prostate cancer and refuses to go any further in the relationship, until he finds out what the outcome is. It has bonded us in our friendship even more though.
This has changed my whole perspective on any form of relationship in what is 'important' and what is not. Life is way too short to live arguing, being caught up in petty things, not serving God together, and loving eachother as He loves us.
Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, but what I do know is that I will live each day, (as if it was my last), with my friend making memories to hold on to should he cross over.
Prayers for healing of his prostrate in Jesus name amen.
Prayers for healing in Jesus Name. This is a good time to put faith in GOD and prayer about counting the relationship and given a chance to walk in faith and not fear. Praying 🙏✨
My ex father in law had prostate cancer. He went into remission 15 years. If this man loves you and the Lord. If you can cope with diagnosis he should propose. He sounds fearful.
I'm so happy you addressed the traditional view of courting and how that does not apply to us older folk. I think back to when we were 18 they told us to go out only in groups of friends, go have pizza together etc. Then you and the person you were sweet on would be making eyes at each other across the table. Lol.
God bless!
We have different “seasons” in life. Being single for a while after divorce is one we may face. As you say, I think it’s important to learn to be self-sufficient and happy in your singleness before committing to another person. Otherwise, you’ll just end-up being codependent.
YES!
In most cases, divorced people are not supposed to remarry, as it is immoral. The church doesn’t usually talk about this though…
This is a good point but it is really scary. I married at age 20. I am 45 now. I never learned how to change my oil or a tire or mow the lawn or fix things around the house. Now I am in a position where I am getting a divorce due to my husband's infidelity. I am so so scared to do life on my own.
Great advice. It's tough being single, but I'll keep trusting the Lord. I agree with the part about being intentional. Otherwise, there's a good chance nothing will happen.
amen
Thank you for this great video. The timing could not have been better given how God has been speaking to me lately. Being single and never married at 50...has been a Struggle for me. There's a decision I need to make. Either I can stay miserable (and alone) over how nothing in my life up to this point has led to marriage, or I can choose to explore and change some things while trusting God to work things out. Blessings-
So glad you found this helpful!
Pray, and get to church where you can study the Bible in a group setting, make Christian friends, fellowship, and let God lead the way. These things will bring you joy! I'm 59, never married and there is so much I've learned from God, scripture, these videos (Mark)... But it's all for my betterment. Be faithful and trust our Father!
As a 48 yr old, We needed this.
Thank you so much for this message. I needed this. Funny thing is everything I thought was what I should do, you said it’s not good to do. I guess I am now considered middle aged at 48🫤. I spent 20 years of my life in an abusive, sinful relationship that the Lord used to break me. After 3 years by myself I honestly don’t know if I want to be bothered anymore. It just seem as if there is no godly men out here. I know my desire is to become married before I leave this earth. Praying that the Lord gives me a husband some day soon.
Singleness is a high calling too :) You don't have to pursue marriage if you aren't happy to :)
Don’t give up ok? Kind of in the same boat and that life was before Christ was in my heart.
Big hugs
Very sound biblical and reasonable advice. I was a successful movie producer and became disabled (albeit am walking again and am showing improvement over the past decade) and I have a 15 yr old son who's dad passed away and is with the Lord since my boy was 9 years old. I never dated anyone bc I did not want my son to be confused about having any male figure that he would fear is trying to replace his daddy. I chose to raise him alone with the men in his life, influencing him being his grandaddy, uncle and pastor. I own my own home pif and have no financial need nor desire to be takrn care of, however as my son gets closer to being a young man, I consider maybe dating someone to have companionship. I am not sure what my expectations should be as I never considered ever marrying or even dating, but I've considered this lately. Even if I don't move forward with that, this advice was very sound. Thank you
Help us older adults we are sort of lost!
God bless!
Very helpful video! Very respectful, non-judgmental! Is a very delicate subject for me. Being single at 40 and praying and waiting on God, I have tried online. But still haven’t met anyone that speak my interest.
Thank you Mark! Every rule in this presentation is worth their weight in gold 🙏❤️ God bless you!
So glad you think so Luba!
Thanks Mark for this video. I am 32 and pursuing my studies in Theology
I am starting to be be intentional , and let God be God. Sometimes just relaxing and waiting for something I do not know when it will come can be exhausting ...
Do not lose hope fam ❤😊
god is mean he only Care's about himself😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢🎉😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢🎉😢😢🎉
@@Lisa-sz8ms He is not mean. He's a good Father! He loves you so much He sent Jesus to die for you!
Everything is in God's timing and we must learn to wait patiently on the Lord, And if marriage is your desire then pray to the Lord continuously.. But at the same time we must be aware of: *Know that the Lord has set apart his faithful servant for himself* the Lord hears when I call to him.
Psalms 4:3 NIV
God bless Victoria!
All I want to do is love my wife from God. My heart is torn. But God never guaranteed happiness for me in this world. God bless you all brothers and sisters. We all need to love each other. Especially many of us who have nobody
Thank you for the video I was widowed at 52 its been a gut punch and after 2 yrs tried dating its been a nightmare..Ive really been asking the lord why 3 yrs Im so lonely and depressed..Im praying for my Boaz every day Idont know why the lord is allowing this ..please pray for me
✡️🕎🛐♂️♀️🛐🕎✡️
Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
I’ve been following you for a while listening to everything, this was one that hit me because I’m 50 although I don’t look like I’m 50. I got really turned off to love recently because I just feel I’m not attracting the right people for me and I am a Christian woman. I kind of gave up on love because it just seems like I can’t find the right man for me mainly a man who loves the Lord. Divorced once and have one grown child and the other still raising. So I completely understand this video I think we need to approach it differently yet I still feel as if it’s hopeless and looking on dating sites I just get so disappointed. I’m not sure if I should Forget about love or ever finding a second chance to be married. They’re slim pickings out there….
So glad this video was helpful for you! Point 7 relates to what you said :)
The words ‘hopeless’, and ‘forget about love’..have strong connotations. I’m 51 been divorced for a long time. I’ve dated for years, and all that entails. Always searching for that someone to complete me. Until one day 4 years ago when the Holy Spirit told me loud and clear, enough. I stopped. It took a while to completely get off all dating sites. To let go of that urge to look for whatever we want to call it..love, happiness etc..I focused on what Jesus tells us instead. On what’s written in the Bible. On Gods honest truth. We can never escape the consequences of our actions but we can be forgiven. We can choose to take the next step in our lives, either closer to the truth or further from it. The truth, as it is said, is what sets us free.
Don’t get me wrong..I still feel it would be really nice to have a partner again sometimes. But only if it were right the Lords eyes. I know I can’t afford to make any other mistakes..and if not, I am content in the love of the Father, the Son and the Spirit. They fill our lives more than any other person ever could. My life is far from perfect but I’m so grateful to be where I’m at right now. It’s not easy to write a message like this without sounding like a Bible thumping loudmouth or holier than thou person..or some other cliché.. the flesh is always going to fight against the spirit though. To want what it wants. Keep your eyes high, focus on Jesus, read the word. It’ll give you strength.
Go to church! I met a wonderful man at church. And he's definitely a Christian!
I am a Believer and a True Born again Christian Man 👨
I hear you loud and clear
Been on dating sites and active in the church and business world 🌎
Very difficult to find someone who lives the Christian life and practices it
Be true to God and yourself during this season of life
Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
I just turned 66 and I'm disabled. I've been told a few times no one will want me. I'm not able to get out because I don't drive. Still praying 🙏
Thank you so much for this video. I’m not quite hitting 40 but I will be in a couple of years. I am grateful for this ministry. You know, there are not many churches who have a ministry for single people. Most ministries are for married couples, children, seniors, men and women which I guess maybe singles could fall under that category but you never see a ministry for singles. Thanks again, Mark. I have learned so much from you, your channel and your latest book.
I am 62, and my last two relationships ended with them cheating on me. They both claimed to be Christians, came from Christian homes, and both were sons of pastors.
So I am not seeking a relationship, I am leaving it in Gods hands. I am O.K. with remaining single, and I think it is what God wants as well. I feel that if God wants me to have a Christian man, he will bring him into my life, but after those last two; I will not be easily fooled again. 😊
In about 2 weeks I will be attending a church retreat where I will get to meet new people from different levels of their faith journey. This is the most "proactive" venture that I can muster (for now) as I am very much introverted and not really putting myself "out there". Although my main reason for joining this event is to learn about the biblical perspective on work, I am secretly praying that this will be a venue for me to eventually meet my future spouse (lol). Nevertheless, please pray for and with me on this. Whatever God has planned as I join this event, may it come to pass for His glory.
A lot of people who are middle aged and single are either widowed or divorced. Very few have not been married unless they were in a long term relationship but never married. Love your videos they are always on point however divorce is not an unforgivable sin and I believe once someone gives their life to Christ even after a divorce, God can send them someone who is on the right track and like they are striving to be.
Marriage after a divorce is adultery. Romans 7 2-3
Marriage is for those who are widow widower o4 never married.
Jesus clearly said that a man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery and causes her to commit adultery. The Apostle Paul echoes this, saying that a woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. The Bible warns in 1 Corinthians 6:9 that whoever lives in adultery WILL NOT inherit the Kingdom of Heaven, so if you as a divorced woman marry someone else while your ex-husband is alive, God considers that a serious enough offense to turn you away from Heaven. Be warned! It's not worth losing your soul for this.
@@selohcinPlease read in context. If cheating or abandonment by an unbeliever happens, divorce and remarriage is allowed for the innocent. Because if that's the case of these blanket statements, no man who divorces his wife should EVER get remarried or have any nee relationship. He should stay single forever. But that rarely happens, right? God is a loving God and is aware of more than we'll ever know. In that passage, it's about a man casting his wife away and she's done nothing sexually, nor he. In that time, men were divorcing for any reason. Jesus was saying under those circumstances, EXCEPT SEXUAL IMMORALITY, the woman was still his wife. He couldn't just cast her off for gaining weight, for example. But if he did, he'd be causing her to commit adultery if she is taken up by another man because the marriage bond was not sexually violated until new man comes into play. The emphasis is still FIRST that the man caused her to sin if he divorces her for random reasons. The man is still greatly accountable for what happens to that woman, except if sexual immorality were involved. Sex outside of a marriage union makes a person unclean and God said we cannot be unclean. That's why sexual immorality is allowed. If there is none, then to break up a marriage between two "clean" people God hates. So a man causing his "clean" wife to end up in the arms of another man does make her commit a dirty act. The man she married commits it, too. But.....,there is Jesus. EVERYTHING is forgivable except blasphemy. Jesus says to go and sin no more. Do not cause another divorce, but live moving forward in Christ.
Thank you for this. I'm 37. I was saved unequally yoked unmarried at 35 so became single. I have two young children and it's really hard to meet anyone as I'm with my children and only go to my church where other Christians are. I've tried some dating apps that are Christian but I found most aren't even Christian on them. I definitely need to be more consistent. 😂😬😬
Agreed, but... let's always remember we can't do anything about height, but "waist size", as you put it, can be managed and the person's complete responsability.
This is really true. I'm single and in my early 40s and actively working on my health and appearance. I think it's wrong for women to fall into the easy trap of letting themselves get very overweight and obese. Many will claim to desire marriage but dismiss the physical element of attractiveness.
That was a great last point you know just enjoy your life don't get better or upset. I'm 33 not quite middle-aged I tried online dating through the last 4 or 5 years because I usually find myself attracted to women from other countries just hasn't worked out I figured it could because we serve a God that can do anything but my last experience God just showed me this is not the way that you're going to get this done son so I stopped. I'm open to whatever he has for me whatever his will is I still believe I'm meant to get married because when I meet someone new I'm excited to meet them especially if they're single or when I see a child it fills my heart up with an expectation of one day I might have a child of my own. So I keep going on and Hope doing my best working in teenage ministry to help other young boys and young women and just keeping a hopeful heart faithful heart. Thanks for the videos mark.
So glad this was useful!
Thank you for this message, God bless you.
Mark, thank you for what I call "balanced wisdom." This is greatly needed because a lot of singles put themselves in a box when it comes to the issues you're describing. I commend you for your willingness to help singles. I'm in my 41st year of serving the Lord. I have grown children--but they suffered growing up because it's a rarity to find a church that has a ministry for singles, single parents, and their children. I hope you have many opportunities to encourage pastors to begin a singles ministry. You are a blessing! I'm on your email list and I'd like to know how to make a donation to your ministry. Jeremiah 32:27--I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for me?
Really great advice in this video. Starting with being intentional about meeting people. How important is it to "meet people" especially to those of us who are "middle age" or little bit past middle age 🤭. It could be the change that is needed.
Mark you are so right about people wanting the whole package , and then never meet them ,but overlook the one that is lacking a couple things, I met my 2 husband on line and he was shorter than me, but most of the 7 years I was with him(he died in 2019) was honestly the best years of my life.i kept thinking what I would of missed if I turned, him down because of his height.,and that also goes for how men want a ten of a woman,when if you made the effort to get to know a five,she's just as good or better.anyway thankyou for saying that.
That's me, constantly deleting and re-downloading dating apps 😬 Good point to not do that!
Same here 🫤
Me too loll
God bless!
@Tyler Lee I agree, in person is ideal, but even hard for someone like me who does live in a big city. You should totally make that shirt 🤪
@Tyler Lee I think my difficulty comes from meeting men who are not in the same season as me. They’re similar in age, but maybe not emotionally available, or think somehow I’m “ahead” of them in life. Also, God’s timing! If he wanted it to be so, he would align it. I’m also doing my part by putting myself out there to position myself for that timing ⏱😊
That’s sadly something I keep hearing abt (online Christian groups)with single Christian’s lately, that they’re not willing to wait for marriage (although I haven’t met anyone in person that thinks this way).
Thank you for this video! I really like how you come off. Very humble. God bless you!
So glad you enjoyed the video!
I'm 47, divorced twice, two kids. I gave my heart to Jesus when I as 19, but never noticed radical change in my walk (very slow and gradual changes) and made countless mistakes through the years. About three months, as if I was knocked off my horse like Paul was, my faith drastically changed with a teary eyed reflection on my past 20 plus years. I re-gave my life to Christ, all of it, full surrender. Immediately, something changed in me. My desire to follow Jesus was intense, I hated my old lifestyle (all of it), I have strived and been successful at being super obedient, denying myself, praying consistently, reading scripture, etc. It has taken a whole new level and people close to me have taken notice. I feel very completely different than before. So here in lies my dilemma. I have been dating a wonderful woman for two years, she is incredible is so many ways except that her Christian faith is on par with what mine was 2 years ago, somewhat lukewarm. I'm faced with a decision on whether to stay with her or leave her. I was planning to propose to her, but now with all my recent changes, I'm beyond stressed. I am fearful to lose her, yet fearful we are not spiritually on equal joke. Welcome any advice...
What is her reaction to these changes in you? Therein lies the answer. If she's open, responding positively, even if it's a muted response, I would say there is hope. If she's responding in an aggressive or negative manner, I would say that there is no future in the relationship. Keep praying about it. Most likely the Lord has already revealed the answer to you.
@@KB-jo8ld Thank you KB, very good advice. I would say she views me like an alien took me, so that is telling alone. I will keep praying and make a decision soon, hoping for a miracle.
@@danielrblend this might also be something to fast about. One word of warning I would say: if she will be a detriment to your walk with the Lord, it's better to gouge out your eye. Painful in the short term but the Lord would bless you for it. I say that fully admitting that there are things in my life that I have yet to surrender fully. But your partner would have an ability to damage your walk like no other thing. All the best with your decision Brother :)
@KB Thank you so much, appreciate your wisdom and insight!
@@danielrblend any wisdom I have given you is from the Lord :) but definitely pray about it because my sinful cynical heart could be in there too. God bless you :)
Thank you, Mark! Right on time to hear this message. ❤️
God bless!
I firmly encourage to find someone attractive to you like you said. If people chose ppl like that there would be less husbands with impure gaze and wives that taint the reputation of these women that are'nt interested in their spouses.
Thank you for these advices🙏🏼
God bless! So glad you found this useful!
reality check from Holy Spirit, im stuck on #6 lol great video brother Godbless🙏✝️
God bless!
A very nice message. I am 45 years old. I never been married and also I'm an introvert. And a single mom. So it is difficult.
So much good sense and wisdom in this series of videos, loving this! Am in early 40's where previous relationships have not worked and were long term but not with Christians (I didn't think it was the issue but maybe it contributed as I've never wavered in my Christian belief...but my parents were 2 different faiths one catholic one totally different and they worked out) so I appreciate the advice here because the 'rules' other people have told me haven't worked.
Honestly, i dont think being a couple is as critical to contentment as we get told it is. Im 52, divorced, no kids. Not sure i ever want to marry again but I sure would LOVE a group of fun and faithful Christian women to pal around with! Even that is tough to find after college...
I'm 59 and widowed. Been with the same man 32yrs. Talk about it being tough! Most men just want sex... even those who know the Bible and know how to worship. Very difficult dating in these times. Prayers for all of us. Thank you for the video. Great information.
This blessed me greatly! Thank you for taking the time to create this video AGW!
hi, this was so very much helpful. thank you for this video.
Glad it was helpful!
I’m only 27 but that man I love is 39. He was hurt in a past relationship and is jaded. He doesn’t want marriage or commitment. The sad thing is that he’s in love with me too but we dance around our feelings for each other😞
I'd move on. You want a jaded man?He's not grounded in Christ.
One of the best videos on this topic
Please pray that I find a good Christian man to spend my life with
✡️🕎🛐♂️♀️🛐🕎✡️
Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
Please pray for me. I have been far from God and backsliding. I entered a relationship with a non believer out of frustration of being single in my 30s. It ended in heartbreak today bc of infidelity. I need God’s grace and perspective and Him to bring healing so I don’t fall into despair. I appreciate any prayer 🙏🏼
✡️🕎🛐🛐🕎✡️
Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
Brother, have you any Biblical guidance for seniors who are single and want to find a follower of Christ for marriage? Thank you for your work and videos. May God bless your ministry and family.
Online dating is probably your best option
Having a Healthy Acceptance of Others
Good Point
Please pray for me. I'm a 42 year old single fèmale. I became disabled at age 30 and I am just now healing. I am worried that I'll be single forever.
Singleness as we know it can last our entire earthly lives at worst, but our earthly lives are actually relatively short. Time flies faster and faster every year. That may sound morbid to you but I hope it's a source of comfort if you really think about it. None of us knows how long will be alive on earth for and it's best to focus on enjoying every day for what it is instead of continually morning what you don't have. Time is short.
This video was very useful. Thank you very much for it.
So glad to hear that!
I Am 65 years Young And I Want To Get Married , I Haven't Given Up Hope . I Trust GOD . Thank You For Your Videos. GOD BLESS 🙏😊
Thank you Mark for doing.....I asked you to do this a while back.......I hope it's God's will to be married.....if it's not i hope lurn to accept it
God bless!
I had a man come into my office and a voice said, " This is your husband". I have not dated for years... not even thinking about a man. But, I was confused. I thought, " Is this a sign from God?" I tried to be obedient, but finding a mate right now was not on my radar. As I began to ponder if there was "something" there, I began finding faults. Maybe his eyes are too close or his ears are too big. And then I felt this immense shame come over me. Who do I think I am!!! Not in a relationship and I am already trying to sabotage it. I have to protect my heart somehow. If this is my blessing, I just threw it back at God. How do you give back a gift that God has given you? Wow. Forgive me God.
I jumped through a lot of hurdles: an unwanted move of continents at 28-years-old, a few jobs, one that kinda kept me trapped in a tough schedule, and at 35 got a breast cancer diagnosis. Now at 39 almost 40, after months of chemo, years of oral meds, I could never be the same person anymore. Plus, living in an Asian busy city where singles don't just land in our house of prayer very often.
So anything conventional at 25-years-old might not apply anymore, after going through so much. Circumstances have been the way they have, and it's not necessarily related to the way I relate to people.
Well, if anyone would show up in my city and in our house of prayer just like that, even getting local ID docs and becoming a legal citizen would be an issue, but sure wouldn't be like 21-year-old people meeting each other. As we age, I think things change, and I get it: it's love we're talking about, and God is not a tyrant. Free will is huge here!
Something that hit me recently and caused me to think is the fact that I just assumed throughout these 11 years that people don't come to a city like the one I live in looking for the kind of marriage where Christ is involved, and I'm just talking demographics, but I would be very caught by surprised if the Lord was to put someone in front of me where I am, a situation that would only show myself how my presumptions are unprepared to deal with a person who might happen to be new in church AND new in Asia and new in the city, who might even need guidance from a local. And yeah, it just happened the way I described. Lord please help me help someone now. 😅😂
Not only that, but the person whom I seem to have so much in common with, whose age is so close to mine has lost a close relative back in their home in a very far continent, a few days ago. I really do believe I'd like to help the person settle and be a good company to this person.
I happen to speak his language and I taught myself his accent because of my school BFF who is from his country, and it's not like I'm one of those Asians desperate for a westerner and trying to make a local ID card offer. I happen to be half Asian, tending to the western side, so the stereotype wouldn't apply. 😂
I have been single since August of 1993. I have dated women and hit dead ends. A lot of it was my fault. I haven't even tried to date since 2011. At this stage of my life, I think it has become moot. I am 70 and retired. I don't view myself as having much of a future. I will do what I can for my children and grandchildren. I do want to build relationships but I don't see anything beyond friendships for me.
You can stay busy for God until your last day on this earth. I think we find our mate while we’re on our path and while keeping our eyes on Jesus
Thought i'd share a personal story. I don't know what God has planned for you or if He is leading you down another path. Never count God out. My friend lost her husband of 45 years about two years ago. Me and another friend used to go over their house for Bible study on Tuesday evenings. December 2021 she was still single and not doing well with online dating. She met a lot of duds. By April 2022 i'm attending her wedding with her British husband who was a reverend and, owns his own business in Britain which is where they are living now. To rewind a little on her life. She is the daughter of missionaries. and, has a cousin that already lives in Britain. Now she is in her mid 70's and her husband in his 80's.
You’re still alive so you definitely have much of a future! God planned and wrote all your days before you were even born (Psalm 139:16). You have a purpose-a specific reason why God needs you on this Earth. Don’t let your age hinder you in any way. Moses was 80 when he led the Israelites out of Egypt. Abraham was “well advanced in age” and still married a second time after Sarah died. If you shift your thinking to “I will get married again” then you enable God to fulfil that desire in your life! 😇
God bless Jesse as you follow the Lord, whatever his will is :)
Hello jesse can we be friends
This is very great and I need to know more about it
Wonderful advice !! As always
So glad it was useful!
Wow, this was a great video with some great wisdom. Thank you.
this is your best video so far.
How timely 🙌🏼🙏🏼
God bless!
This is good advice. Thank you.
I am 70, widowed and would love to be married again.
Thank You for Sharing
I am 65 and circumstances have made me wonder if there is a possible future out there
Still working and healthy and active
Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
I can tell you are walking with the Lord. Thank you for this.
Thanks for these insights. Great stuff 👏🏽
My pleasure!
I thought this was going to be bullsh*t, but this was actually good advice. Good job!
34, here! Only briefly dated once (not really serious), still waiting. But I think I need to put myself out there a little more. I am getting antsy and restless. I think I do need to change something and get out more.
Middle age and divorced. I can't see me getting married again. I waited my turn and never got a chance.
As he stated, you can do all these things and still be single. If you're middle aged and watched every single person around you get married and you're STILL single... Its by God's doing... Not yours.
God is sovereign and providential and he has the power to run you into whomever it is that he has pre-ordained for you to marry... Whether its at church, work, the grocery store or the gym 🤷🏾♀️
If it hasn't happened... Don't be hard on yourself... Its a part of God's unknown plan.
Yes. The Lord's ways are higher than ours. I feel blessed to remember that in heaven, we will all be more closely connected to each other than the best relationship on earth. So, whether we get married down here or not, in the next life, we all win.
Philippians 1:6!
Considering what I've done with my free will in the past, I'm content (mostly), to give God the wheel and count in Him to create my love story. So far He's working wonderful things in my life.
Lots and lots of people die unmarried. God lets a lot of Christians die unwed. He's not obligated to send everyone a spouse and the Bible never promises it. God is not just up there making matches and doing nothing else.
God in His sovereignty allows people to make mistakes and screw up their lives. Stupid passivity and refusing to take necessary action can produce horrific lifelong consequences He won't shield you from. In His sovereignty He creates ugly, repulsive awkward people because He has preordained, they spend their lives alone. My great aunt was homely and eccentric. Died unwed at 90.
Thanks for the great info😊
Thank you for this video
Great advice, to take advice with a pinch of salt & let God be God.
Because of the destruction of family, religion, and no provided direction for either the average person or believer in the West they have been left to simply “figure things out on their own”. Feminism has conned the general populace into believing there are no differences between men and women and that males preferences for a mate simply don’t matter. In my opinion churches should be involved in vetting young people for marriage (if that’s what they wish to pursue), such as providing a true matching service rather than providing counseling after the couple has already decided to marry. This passive mentality of families and churches has led to this situation of sheer directionlessness in mate selection.
Thank You Mark!
My pleasure!
I believe God is preparing me for marriage.
God bless!
Great video. I was molested at thirteen years old; I probably have trust issues.
Great vid, thanks.
Glad you liked it!
It's important to BECOME the type of person you want to be married to/ marry.
That’s the issue a lot of men attracted to me are in there early or middle 30’s or a little over 40. They are either leaving a marriage or getting out a relationship. I’m 40 and divorced for over 5 years and a certified mental health life coach
Isn’t that a good thing , a guy in his 30s?
Praise the Lord! 🌷🌷🌷
Amen!
Thank you so much!
thank you!!!
God bless!
Love this