lost alone and broke in my 20s
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 14 май 2023
- This is the first time I finally made something straight from my heart. No letting fear or the algorithm get to me. People make videos about their life. And people watch. There is no reason that can't be me. Enjoy what I hope to be the first of many coming of age vlogs, alone in my 20's and navigating life.
MY SOCIALS:
IG: / cynical_duchess
Tiktok: @cynical_duchess
Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/cynical_duchess/
FOR WHEN I'M FAMOUS AND HAVE BUSINESS INQUIRIES:
thecynicalduchess@gmail.com
FEATURED:
@hannahwarling
@SteAndRach
co-edited by Paride Scanferlato
thumbnail inspired by @damondominique
DISCOUNT CODES:
for 10% off Goli Vitamins use code: cynical_duchess
go.goli.com/cynical-duchess
Ultimate Guide To College Applications: students.collegeessayguy.com/...
MY JOURNEY:
500 subs: March 20, 2021
1,000 subs: August 6, 2021
5,000 subs: December 11, 2021
10,000 subs: December 28, 2021
50,000 subs: Manifesting
FAQ:
what's your name? Batsheva!
where did you go to college? I studied film at BU
what camera do you use? Sony ZVE10 and I use premiere pro to edit
if you have any other questions lemme know down in the comments and i'll add them here!
MUSIC:
Get Head Above Water by Avril Lavigne and over 1M + mainstream tracks here go.lickd.co/Music
License ID: joZxl6N4ZwX
Get Wrecked by Imagine Dragons and over 1M + mainstream tracks here go.lickd.co/Music
License ID: LQo8W307P2w lickd.lnk.to/cyft2mfXID!Cynic...
Get Skinny Love by Birdy and over 1M + mainstream tracks here go.lickd.co/Music
License ID: 4QY964dQMPA lickd.lnk.to/pPhd6HID!Cynical...
Here Comes The Sun Beatles Guitar by Thomas75s • The Beatles - Here Com...
La La Land City Of Stars cover by Gavin James • City Of Stars - La La ...
all other music by Epidemic Sound
TAGS:
feeling lost in life, wasted 20s, things i wish i knew, feeling behind in life, living alone diaries, feeling lost in life 20s, feeling lost in life 30s, things i wish i knew in my 20s, how to get your life together, vlog, twenties, feeling behind in your 20s and in life, life in your 20s, surviving your 20s, advice for surviving your 20s, figuring out life in your 20s, for people feeling behind in life,20s advice, living alone vlog, navigating your 20s #youtubenewwave 
Хобби
Also everyone hit the LIKE button so Batsheva can get her soondubu jigae
IM STILL CRAVING IT
As someone 10 years older who’s been in your position, the fact that you have friends and family to support you means you’ll be OK. Also, you created a whole RUclips channel on your own and consistently uploaded content. You have the internal motivation to continue to succeed. You will be fine even if it doesn’t feel like it.
having friends and family to support me is a huge gift which I'm grateful for every day. it's one of the most important tools G-d has given me to help me continue, especially for these instances when I can't do it alone. I hope you as well have a support system that loves you and is there for you.
I'm a Catholic guy that went to a small Catholic school in the middle of borough park in Brooklyn and you have a gift. A gift that not allot of people have. I'll name a few. Honor, integrity, imagination, you know who you are and you are able to share your feelings. And bring broke at 27 well don't feel bad I'm broke at 55 I work full time but inflation is hurting allot of people. But I have a roof over my head, a car, my health and 2 wonderful daughters. And a dream that is similar to yours. Thank you for being real
Gregory, thank you for this message. It’s so important to look at the things we have as well. I’m grateful for my support system, the beautiful LA weather, and an unshakeable belief that G-d can help me with anything. We will reach our dreams.
In the same exact place as you and at times the shame and embarrassment is intolerable. I wish more people would talk about how it's okay to take your time pursuing dreams rather than constantly pushing the narrative that you need to be 100% successful and independent at 22 years old. This is such an important video!! So glad you have such a strong support system and that you're not giving up. We got this! Thank you!
we do got this!!! one thing people never mention is that those same 22 year olds, even if they reach success early, can still struggle later on, either to maintain that success, or to grapple with a challenge they never actually had practice overcoming. some of the most successful people who maintain their success, are those that failed so much for so many years and gained skills and persistence that when they did succeed, made them greatly stronger than any of their competitors-- an example of this is Mr. Beast.
I feel the same way. 27, working a crappy job that doesn't pay enough. We will make it, knowing that is what helps me get out of bed every morning.
life is filled with seasons and nothing is permanent! the best feeling when you're in your worst spot is knowing that its almost over and spring is about to come
“Jewish in her 20s, unemployed, struggling to find food that’s kosher and achieve her dreams, but never willing to give up”. Wow! That was extremely relatable. If I had to sum up my life in one sentence that would probably be it, specially the “struggling to find food that’s kosher” part.
b”h we’ll both achieve our dreams very soon :)
You're so awesome and brave! I think we can all relate to how you're feeling in our own ways. I feel like everyone goes through a time like this but some people pretend it didn't happen while others try to connect over it. Good luck girl!
So so real! Love this! Keep up the fantastic work
amen and you too!!
Perfect timing on the video! I’ve recently been feeling like this lately, so thank you!
you are so welcome
WOW so excited I've been waiting for this 🤩
ayyyyyyy
So well edited! I totally understand and relate to this! Your content is so brilliant! So much amazing effort in this video! Deserves a million views!! And it’s entertaining!! ❤
Incredible piece of storytelling
Probably one of my favourite vids of yours! Keep up the good work! We’re rooting for you!!
Faisal, thank you!! I once heard a RUclips manager mention that the algorithm is very slow to catch on to quality, but it eventually does get there, because quality always rises to the top. we're gonna keep on going!!
Bat, Thank you for making this video !! It made me feel so seen I shed a tear. Your conviction is inspiring, may hashem keep you!!
this is absolutely the motivation anyone needs to keep going!! as someone who is also contemplating whether all of this effort in trying to make it is worth it, i can absolutely relate to what you're going through 💖
dude, totally DM me if you wanna talk this through!
Don't give up, you're amazing love!!
thank you Alice
This is incredible! The getting dressed thing hit close to home. 💜
deceptively tough lol
Wow this video was a rollercoaster of emotions! You told your story so beautifuly- we felt the pain and the hope along with you. Here to cheer you on! 💪
Everything happens for a reason
Batsheva! This is beautifully made! Also you always have a job with me in nyc if you need it!!
Thank you Michelle
I’m so glad that you didn’t give up. Stay strong and Kol Hakavod for the amazing video ❤️
Thank you Laura! I'm glad I'm continuing too. really proud of this and excited for the future.
It's very motivating to see that more and more people express their realities, fears and worries. Being in my last year of high school, I think more and more about what my future will be like, it's encouraging to see how you don't give up on your dreams!
PS: I loved your outfit with the white boots
I love it when people online share a little of what they're going through. it makes them feel real. You Dafna, are going to have an amazing future. you've already written a book for goodness sake! You're amazing. I'm only excited for you.
This is what I call a work of art. ❤
Humbled by your gratitude. You're already a shining✨
thank you
I love when you make your videos about you. Your storytelling game is 👌
thank you!! and I love making them too. I love stories, and G-d willing there will be way more on here.
Honored to have made the credits but also such a great video 👏👏 so relatable to anyone doing something creative or pursuing a passion project, this one hits home
I feel like so many people feel this way, we just never talk about it
Almost forgot!
I've seen all of your videos
And this is your best yet!❤
Thank you Daisy!! I'm really excited for what's to come
In the middle of the video, I stopped only to like it and let you know: you are amazing! Twenty minutes ago, when I got the notification about your new video, I was so excited. Your videos are always my favorites. I watch yours first, before anything of the "big" RUclipsrs. I wish you finally the accommodation and the money you deserve. ❤
it takes so much courage to meet yourself where you are in reality and also put it up online i always love your work ethic and the transparency :) Loving the new chapter and them 닭발 was a very very bold choice to make ahahah i dont even know how to make it or eat it properly so proud of you for getting back up God knows the best timing for us and i 200% believe in you since you are prepared and strong!
I absolutely love your ability to tell a story through film!! Please make a video on your cinematic filmmaking tips for RUclipsrs starting out 💗
wow, thank you Asia! My biggest tip is watch a lot of movies and gain inspo from how they craft things. hope you're doing well girl!
Girl, I can’t believe I’m just finding you. You’re so relatable and real. Definitely just subscribed ❤️
I love your fashion content, but I really like this personal/introspective content, keep it up !
thank you!! and I definitely have more fashion content dw
Butsheva, thanks a lot for sharing your emotions with us! I don't know what to say, I don't know why i brust into tears watching this video i just want to give you all my love and support♥ You are so strong, unique and creative, youve been inspiring me and my friends last 6 moths a lot, i want you to know that everything you do has an impact. Though Im thousands kilometers away in Russia, and with all this shit going on here, you are the one who makes my smile shine and warms my heart even in the darkest times. All the numbers are secondary, im sure they will grow as you go on making content you like, and im so glad youre not giving up!
Lydia your comment brought tears to my eyes and I read it to my mother. everything does have an impact, G-d bless you
omg this video is speaking directly to my soul. I'm also 27, jobless, constantly compare myself to more successful peers and feel deep shame afterwards.
Batsheva, thank you for making this video. sometimes it feels as if I'm the only one who's going through something like this. the video was a great reminder that my brain is a liar sometimes. and that I shouldn't give up too fast.
I think so many of us go through this season but we just never speak about it. I'm sick of all these highlight reel vlogs on RUclips all set in Paris or NYC where they never show their struggles. it creates this lie that those of us struggling are alone. but we're not. we all go through it, and we all thrive after.
Best of luck on your journey! I completely resonate with your feelings and have a similar story. ❤😊
This was beautiful. Thank you. I look forward to more videos :)
Thank you, and there will be more like these
Love this!! What a great video!! :)
TACO
I relate to this so much. Last year I worked on a project that I adore, it was one of my goals in life and I was so happy to achieve it. But since the end, I feel lost. I miss those times so much it hurts, I have tried to move on and do other things, with bad results. I talked about having a block on therapy, but it hasen't been helpful. I'm 22 and although I know I'm young and I don't have to have my life figure out yet, seeing my friends graduating from college and getting jobs makes me feel in a rush and terrible.
Well we also live in a time when houses cost a minimum of half a million dollars whereas our parents purchased those same houses for the 10th of the prices. It is impossible to succeed for 2 people let alone for one. The system sucks!
its definitely possible to succeed!!!! Don't ever ever ever ever give up hope. it just takes different methods than our parents took.
Batsheva,
Thank you for sharing about being in a rut. It is definitely not easy to reveal your vulnerability with anyone. But a perk of sharing your feelings is finding those who could relate. I myself, being one of those people. I am also a twenty-something who lives with her mom, goes to bookstores for comfort and buys books that she doesn't need, and having the thought of quitting loom over her daily. And making comparisons and living in this economy does not make it any better.
However, I am here to say that you and your content has helped me take risks with my fashion. You, and the individuals you include in your videos, encouraged me to be experimental with my clothes, no matter the occasion, and have the most fun while doing so! Overall, you have helped me embrace my misfit, and I am sure that there are plenty of others who would say the same. So keep going! I have to tell myself that, too! :)
thank you for this amazing message Presley. Can definitely relate to buying books I don't need hahahah. something I'm realizing more and more is that when there is a spark to what we are doing, when we know deep inside that we have something special, we really can't give up, because it's still cultivating and growing. this channel and the message I'm trying to impact is definitely one of those things, and if there's something that you too are working on that hasn't happened yet, just hold on to that feeling. when your gut knows that it'll work, then it'll work.
This is so good
this was truly inspiring! i’m glad you have people to help you during the darkest times, we all need a little help sometimes. i’m glad you spoke instead of keeping it all in one journal. by the way, 5:02 was super cinematic. so props to you on that, i have a feeling that you may enjoy working apart of a film crew or something in the entertainment industry! :)
Im also truly thankful for the people around me. I spent so many years feeling so alone and not feeling like I had anyone to reach out to, so cultivating this support system is something I'm grateful for everyday. hehe I went to film school! so I took a lot of cine classes and I have a deep love of photography. my favorite bits of the entertainment industry are producing and writing, but we shall see...
@@CynicalDuchess im glad you had the opportunity to reach out! i recently started watching your channel, you’re truly talented. i’m also interested in the entertainment industry, specifically editing or directing. i come from a hard working family, so i hope i have that hard working mind set like they do. i’m really into fashion as well, that’s how i found your channel. your taste in clothing is fascinating, i love it!
This was an INCREDIBLE VIDEO ❤
Thank you Harriett!!
Such a great video Batsheva!! The intro got us super hooked And glad to know you are not quitting!! Also, it was an absolute pleasure to meet you
next time in Europe!
I just want to say you’re a really big inspiration to me. I started watching you after my father passed away last year. You just gave me hope that as an Orthodox person that you can do your dreams no Matter what people say .I even started a RUclips channel and I’m not the greatest and I still need a lot of work. But Thank you for giving me inspiration.
Amen sister
ur amazing
tank u
Wow! Editing skills are awesome 👏 I need to step it up 😂
I'm comforted knowing that I'm not the only one going through a confusing time. I had to leave my job and move back to my home country. I hope to be able to travel for a while (this itself is a privilege) but I'm not sure what I want to do after that. Most of my friends have stable, well-paying jobs and are busy starting families. I joke I'm semi-retired but I will eventually have to find a job.
I hope you are able to find happiness and fulfillment, I'm hoping to find the same as well.
I’m 41 and just starting to do the things I always wanted to do, it can take more time and sacrifice but often what works is accidental and the lessons you learn are the foundation to be capable when the time does come
exactly what you said. I've been realizing more and more that all these failures are the building blocks that will eventually give us that competitive edge when it's time for us to succeed. Hollywood sells this idea that we need to be successful by 22 or we're done for. But those 22 year olds, often had 15 years of failure as child slaves before they popped off. and 41 is so young. you have at least another 50 years to change the world. age is garbage. looking forward to what you'll do.
@@CynicalDuchess you just have to enjoy each day as much as possible cause that’s all it is, a series of days strung together
Thank you for sharing this video! I was going through cloudy days and your videos always helped me see the bright days that seemed gloomy without you. You're awesome!
By the way I love Harry Potter books and I thought you were a kosher fashion model for income lol
I'm so happy! Only blue skies ahead
Don’t give up!!!! ❤
I won't!!
I feel you
I got u
We work to live, not live to work. As long as you are able to feed yourself and have a roof over your head, you're doing fine. I think the problem comes into play if you are feeling you want more and more. Comparing ourselves to others is the deadliest form of poison and the media has us trained to never be satisfied. I'm someone who likes excess, and it's as bad as being someone with nothing. The good thing about your YT is that the income becomes passive over time and can bring in some money, even if just a little, so all your work will not have been for nothing. I can say that you've experienced a lot more travel than most people will in their lifetime so along with your friends and family, at least you have that to be thankful for ❤
sometimes i honestly think we’re the same person or living the same life, batsheva 😭 i lost my job in march, i’ve applied to over 150 job positions in a month with no luck, i have £50 left to my name, and i have until june to move out of where i’m currently living. i keep telling/asking myself ‘i did everything right: i did well at school, never misbehaved or went off the rails despite all the trauma i went through growing up, and barely complained when life was tough - so why have i failed? why am i in such a crap situation? why haven’t i found success and stability? do i just not deserve it? am i just meant to spend the rest of my life suffering?’ idk what the answer or outcome to my or your situation is but hope and faith (and a little bit of delusion) has kinda helped 😕 sorry for the essay but anyways i absolutely loved this video, it resonated with me so much and you inspire me so much ❤❤
You’re going through one of the toughest moments of your life, which means that some of the best moments are right around the corner. Sending strength.
That's my friends Candyshop Edelweiss. Anyway, thank you for sharing your story. Don't give up! Living a creative life is challenging but worth it. You will get there!
please tell them thank you for making some of their stuff kosher so I can eat there!!
Youre still a winner in my book 😊
I am the same age as you. My 20s haven't been good so far but I am looking forward to my future. I'm still young, I want to be able to accomplish so much and still have fun.
Yeah, I'm 29 and I can relate. I'm finishing graduate school and I'm just now committing to a field of study and work.
normalize figuring ourselves out in our late 20's
❤
off topic but i love your mom's kitchen!
my moms kitchen is actually kinda cute hehe
I'm stuck exactly like this and fixing to turn 25 :/ Just don't have friends for support or really anybody. Its gets really lonely dealing with this and struggling everyday just not knowing what to do and how to start.. I'm glad to see your channel though and wish I had the strength like you've had to get through this. You're really an inspiration
I promise it will get better. You may feel like you’re in your winter season, but before you know it, it will be spring. From pain always comes growth. You got this ❤️🩹
@@CynicalDuchess Thank you
Don't ever give up.
never.
I remember being alone and broke in LA in my 20s in the 80s and here in the 20s and in my 60s and comfortably retired.
You must have so many stories
This is beautiful, when we feeling small God's closer us 💕
i feel so lost too
is tough out there
This was really good and you have such talent and great way of story telling. Keep pushing!
Batsheva, you're a queen. Don't you ever forget that.
And even queens need help getting up sometimes.
absolutely correct
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
I like the Thief Lord; maybe you should try getting a library job to share your love of books with others. I worked a library job for a few years, it was a good for a time
That actually sounds like SUCH a fun job!!
Target has a great kosher (ksa certified) kimchi. It’s called Seoul Kimchi by Lucky foods.
❤❤❤
Raw. Powerful. Real.
thank you
🥺❣️
Hi! I have been subscribed to you for a good while now, I am significantly younger but I have some advice that may help. Even when your at your darkest hour, when your unsure where life is going to take you next, remember that life has chapters. Each chapter is different. Like any book, there are good and bad chapters. However, do you notice that the protagonist learns to rise above their hardships? It may take one, maybe even 3 chapters. There will be many chapters where you struggle and wonder if anything is worth it. But, remember. Life is like a book. Sometimes you just need to wait for those bad chapters to flip good-bye.
I love this analogy!! Totally takes being the main character to a really deep level. Because we are the main characters, and all main characters go through seasons. After winter, there’s always spring, and that’s a really comforting thought.
@@CynicalDuchess EXACTLY!! i loved how to tied in winter and spring!! (im a massive book nerd so that makes me so happy!!)
My voice..
voice of generation
One day soon in the future you'll get a million subscribers and a handbag which matches your shoes...Great entertaining channel your onto a winner sister keep going !!!
Los Angeles is not a happy place to be
But I'm betting on your creativity!
Hang in there!💯
AGREED. hate LA.
👑👑👑
Batsheva you are awesome! :) I'm a newtuber (less than 100 subscribers so far) and I have read that it's good to reach out to businesses you would like sponsorships with and also to make use of affiliate links (in this video it could be amazon links to the products you used in it such as the books and food items perhaps). I know you have what it takes to succeed! Excited to see you get "there" and then beyond!
amen sister. and you as well. we all gotta start somewhere, and then we gotta keep pushing after that. we got this
I spotted me hehehe!!!
only cool girlies
🙏🙏🙏🙏
If I could make you a suggestion, perhaps working in a library as a librarian surrounded by great fun books might be something that can help you and help with the loneliness void that you have. The work in there might be tedious but never difficult.
Also you aren't alone, many people in their 20s and even 30s feel lost and lonely but always remember that you have friends and family there for ya.
❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
✨️✨️✨️
I know how it feels, I'm 26 still living with my parents and never been on a date. Sometimes i just wanna laugh at myself for real and i do question: I'm i failure? I see my ex colleagues with jobs, kids etc and here I am same position that i been my whole mediocre life. But you know I'm not stressing about it, one thing I've learned is we all times different times, don't compare yourself to anyone else because nobody knows your struggles. Hopefully through what I'm doing right I'm probably leaving my parents house real soon, i mean I'm 26 i got a whole life to live and explore. It might not interest you or whatever but why don't you try forex trading...
Hey Botsheva hang in there you will be okay. I know you will.
not gonna lie the part about not being able to pay for your groceries falls a little flat when you follow it up with ordering from instacart
My mother paid for those :)
💝💝💝💝💝💝
Make more videos!
On chicken feet: they need to be cooked longer, for like an hour.
I definitely realize that now hahahahah
Btw, I’m serious about making more videos. Some of your videos are so good, they are addictive. I’m literally rewatching this one second time.
What matters most is to be independent from your mother. That is why they are do unbearable: to convince you to leave home after 18.
I left home at 19 and lived away for 7 years :)
💟💟💟💟💟💟
Job wise: ever thought of wanting to be part of kiruv work?
Could be fun :)
Kiruvs a lot of fun!
🙈heh hope u don't mind me having fun posting emojis
nope! don't mind at all!
You're very pretty the reason you are sad is because you don't have a man. I'm not trying to be rude, I used to be depressed until I was 18, I thought something wrong with me but then I got a boyfriend and realized the true happiness can only be this way, you're social and beautiful my advice to you is to find a man that you like that is good looking to you not just anyone
My sweet friend, true happiness is being content with who you are, and once you’re able to be happy on your own, a partner will make that experience sweeter.
{{{hugs so tight with love}}} Please know that you are a treasure. I VALUE you. Your videos are a simple joy in my life. You help inspire my creativity. THANK YOU. (And, I'm old enough to be your mother!)
Do more comments help the algorithm more?
Yessss!!! And liking the vid! And Sharing it with anyone you feel may like it! (But no pressure) ❤
Maybe you could try setting up a patreon page for subscribers to support your channel and the making of your videos.
Ive been thinking about it actually...
Listen. I literally go search up your name and look forward to your videos. Especially when i want to watch Jewish content or just content made by someone Jewish not on tiktok. I hope you don't give up on your dreams.
c'mon chicken feet haul
You need a good Gentile fella!
you say that you never had a boyfriend before and you are in your later 20s? if so, i'm sorry, but at the same time, your case is another reminder, how i have always found it more shocking to hear of a woman still single by a certain age compared to a guy, since women don't have to do the pursuing and be the ones to approach a guy or ask a guy out, never expected to be the initiators like men always have, thats why i find it more shocking for a woman who has never dated by a certain age compared to a guy.
literally what are you talking about it is 2023
I’m Inspired