Playing the piano was the first thing I ever put my whole heart into. When I was a teenager, being a musician was my identity. I was one of the best in my school district, and I got used to being told how amazing I was. So I went to college for music in Boston, where, suddenly, I wasn't the best anymore. Not even close. There were 13 year olds who were better than me. I got discouraged, and dropped out after two years. It was around that time I got interested in philosophy ("intellectual" often being the persona adopted by people who have failed at everything else). Though I eventually found success as a video essayist, for the last twelve years I've been haunted by that original sense of failure. The formative ego-wound. It's why I'm captivated by characters like Squidward and Salieri, "the patron saint of mediocrities." I hate the part of me that they remind me of. If you try to bury the ugly parts of your mind, they end up directing your life from beyond your awareness. So like Jung says, it's best to remain on speaking terms with your own shadow. I've been playing the piano again lately. It's one of the few things that I love so unironically I struggle to even talk about it. The word "amateur" originally meant "lover," a person who does something out of passion, not professionally. So despite its current sneering connotations, I think being an amateur is good, actually. You don't have to be "the best" at something for it to be worth doing. But I do still struggle to play in front of other people, or to record myself. I'm much better at listening to music than I am at playing it, and I always hear the defects, everything that could be improved. I try to see the upside-recognizing the possibility for improvement gives you a reason get out of bed. What if one day I sat down at the piano and played perfectly? What then? What were there be left to to do? Just die I guess, like Nina in Black Swan. Anyway here's some music by Erik Satie, a relatably drink-sodden and all-around not-perfect person, who still managed to write some languidly beautiful music.
even if this only comes of as 1 of 100,000s of self-identified "simp"s, I really hope you're also able to hear the truth in those words. Surely not every single one of us that likes you is completely delusional, that would be statistically unlikely at best.
The courage to be openly amateur is under-appreciated. Being able to feel comfortable publicly embracing and celebrating those things that fall into the “sublime” or “beyond words” realms, and resonate with us on that core (possibly embarrassing) level, would improve all of our lives so much.
as someone who had the same experience growing up being a musician and then getting to college and seeing how outclassed i was about to be, this is incredibly uplifting to take in. thank you.
Natalie, even some of the worlds top 20 concert pianists when listening back to their performances always critique what they should have done better or need to improve on. I think that that shows how much you care and it’s better to care then to feel you are already perfect and have no need for improvement. I think only a narcissistic person who’s a total douche would think that they are already perfect and need not work on their craft any longer so thanks for not being a total grandiose narcissist!!! What kinda piano do you have? If it’s not a Bosendorfer girl friend then the next time you are piano shopping you should look into a Bosendorfer. They are like the epitome of some of the best pianos in the world and yes you deserve the best!!!! Carry on Queen!!!!! Please keep playing for us mere mortals!!!! ♊️💜♾💯
I still very distinctly remember the time my piano teacher, this young Russian woman, who had always been exceedingly kind and patient with me, but of course still had me playing the classics first, handed me Satie's music for the first time. I instantly fell in love with his work, because it exemplified so much about the way I had always intuitively approached the piano: no fixed tempo, no obsession with formal patterns, just raw emotions from a deeply melancholic soul. Satie's music holds a very special place in my heart. Now I'm living a thousand miles away from my old home in my new home, a port town on Norway's west coast, studying for my master's, unable to afford my own piano, so I am very grateful for this in ways that hard to put into words. Since Satie's notation is so lose, there are a million ways to play his music, and your's speaks to very similar understanding that I've had. You don't need to be a professional to play satie well, you need to bring great emotionality into it. I love this very much and it brings me great joy to hear somebody I look up and helped me through their work realize I am non-binary, play these songs I love so dearly. Thank you, Natalie.
I got myself into a pretty weird place tonight, and a regal Lesbian playing Eric Satie on the piano turned out to be _exactly_ what I needed! Thank you!
You are right: This is perfect for an early morning after a long night of not sleeping and doing stuffstuffstuff that one could not recall the day after. Gives me a sense of ease and rest. Thank you!
Blows my mind that Natalie can play the piano so well, be relentlessly funny, be incredibly well read and understand philosophy, be breathtakingly pretty and incredibly good at makeup and fashion and yet constantly make jokes about self-loathing. I guess I can sympathize as a fellow hot person with low self esteem 😝
Im so tired of the word "simp." Now you are a simp for just appreciating someone's talent? Or is it telling them you appreciate their talent that makes you a simp? Idk, but the word has lost all meaning, along with karen, incel, chad, and dozens of other words. Ruined through over-use and mis-use
“You see? No shock. No engulfment. No tearing asunder. What you feared would come like an explosion is like a whisper. What you thought was the end is the beginning.” xx
I didn’t even know my mom could play piano until she started playing gymnopedies on our old piano one day like a few months ago. I don’t know why she waited till now to get back into it but it’s nice
Until I saw "a few months ago" I thought you were talking about Natalie, because of the type of mommy dommy comments people leave on her videos. I'm so sorry, I've been poisoned.
No one asked but the Trois Gymnipédies helped me through a lot of my grief after my dad's death early this year. Now that I'm (kinda sorta) starting to come out of that grief, it's lovely to have a pleasant context around it. It's bittersweet, but thank you, Natalie. This was wonderful.
That's something i really love about music with no words. it allows everyone to attach their own experiences and emotions to a piece every time they hear it. I'm sorry to hear about your father, and I am glad you could enjoy this.
I have a kitten. Her name is Milkyway and she's one year old now! Usually she is easily bored, yelling at me lots and zooming around when she isn't sleeping. When I put this video on, she sat down in front of the TV screen and attentivsly watched. She sat there quietly the whole video through. Now I put it on for her again and she immediately climbed to a spot on her cat tree where she can see it well while making a nappy face. Seem's like she enjoys Satie!
@@globaldigitaldirectsubsidi4493 she did play some Goldberg Variations in one of her videos. That requires some talent. And she went to music college for a while I believe.
Tbh, this is how I got through seasonal affective disorder as a teenager. Only problem is, if you're feeling bad at 3am, you get yelled at for waking everyone up.
Yes, the existence of amateurs is wonderful. The world of possible human striving belongs to us all. The only qualification you need to participate is passion!
One of the things I've always loved about Satie is that his music reveals more about the person performing it than it ever could about the person who composed it in the first place. A grand enigma, I consider his nearest parallel in modern music to be Trent Reznor. Wish I could click "love" on this video instead of just "like".
This is the first song I ever was completely transfixed by. I think I was probably 11 or 12, and my music class teacher asked us to draw what came to mind when we heard this song, I never knew the name of the song but upon hearing it over 15 years later I suddenly was able to figure out it was the same song I heard when I was young. Thanks for sharing this, Natalie.
Erik Satie is one of my favorite composers and historical figures. The fact that Contra put together a whole stream setup to play his most famous piece warms my cold, rotting, forsaken heart.
I dropped out of Berklee too when I got discouraged over not being the best anymore. thank you for making me feel like its ok to try again. this touched my heart deeply.
This just shows how much effort and hard work ContraPoints puts into her videos. Not only is she playing beautifully, the set, the lighting the costume, everything is beautiful as so well thought out. Well done!
I don't think this is a set... it's just her house. I don't think that is a costume per se, either. The lighting is just a colour changing lamp thingy, but is nice, and yes the playing is lovely, along with the rest of it. Things would have been arranged a bit though, yes.
Natalie, You have a special talent for finding and communicating beauty. Even as you speak of horrible people doing horrible things, you keep a core of beauty in your world. I’m sure you listen back to these and just hear how you would do it slightly differently next time, but honestly the gesture we see is something stunning and otherworldly. I hope you can keep doing the things that you want, the way that you want, because you’re showing thousands of people something they didn’t know they wanted to see. This is good work.
For me, Satie's Gymnopédies have such a tension of anticipation, expecting the next note or chord and having it come just the slightest hint later than would be comfortable. Your tempo and musical choices here are so expressive and expectant, beautifully done!
"At no point can you seize the musical experience and hold it. Unlike that moment in a film when a still shot suddenly immobilizes a complete scene, a single musical moment immobilized makes audible only one chord, which in itself is comparatively meaningless. This never-ending flow of music forces us to use our imaginations, for music is in a continual state of becoming." (Aaron Copeland Music and Imagination) Technical prowess is overrated. What makes a true musical talent is the ability to channel emotion into each note, sparking the imagination of the listener so both heart and mind experience the story. What makes an extraordinatry talent is the ability to write those stories yourself. I loved evey moment of this. I would love to hear what your story sounds like.
Natalie knowing someone who at the end advocates for compassion and understanding have so much success, inspires me. Thank you for always moving forward despite everything, you're an incredible human being.
I feel that so much. I was struggling bad with anxiety today as well (hell, the past month has been rough…) we’re fortunate to have moments of reprieve like this
I grew up with a piano at home because my father was an enthusiast. All these years later I took up piano (I’m 36). My father asked me why. I told him I realized recently that you don’t have to be good at something to do it, you should do it because you want to. You’re playing is as good as any I’ve heard recorded.
As a former musician with "potential", I understand this struggle. But your performance, "flaws" and all, is made more beautiful by the effort and courage it takes to face and cleanse the ego-wound. Bravo.
This is one of my favorite pieces. I love Satie so much. Him, Debussy. Okay, I might be a simp for late 19th and early 20th century French impressionist composers.
I had a few bad days, but tonight I have listened "Clair de Lune" and "Gymnopedie no. 1" and I got better, it's like I needed this... Peace, thank you Natalie❤️
As somebody who plays the piano actively for 10 years, this really is amazing. Not a single mistake and in a single take, you truly are a musician. Not making mistakes in piano takes confidence, each note absolute as soon as it is hit, it is a confidence I would like to have myself.
Natalie, I’ve known you were a fan of “classical” music for a while because of the amazing soundtracks to your video essays, but I’m so happy to hear that you decided to start playing piano again. Please keep going. I want to hear you play Mozart sonatas, Chopin nocturnes, Debussy miniatures, and whatever other music YOU want to play... as a fellow pianist/musician, it makes me so happy to know that one of my favorite thinkers/essayists shares my love and passion for music. This was so cool.
Listened to this sat on my roof, eating lunch and watching the trees sway in the breeze. Life's been so stressful lately, so it was a lovely moment. Thank you Natalie.
From the areas you’ve shown us of your new places I am in LOVE with your decor. It’s almost like a slightly 90’s inspired middle-class style of restrained opulence. I love it
I had a similar experience, but with visual arts. Even though i knew i wasn't super great I was always praised as a child and told how gifted I was, then my art school sent me to a national contest one time and i completely blew it and saw so many far younger students there outperform me like it was nothing. after that I felt these unrealistic expectations from my teachers become a crushing weight more than anything positive or flattering. It felt as if I not only couldn't be as good as the kids at these national competitions, but I didn't even feel as good as I was told I was before when i could believe that i was doing alright. Art became a chore and a race and i stopped painting as i wasn't enjoying the process anymore, because of being so fixated on needing to be better. I hear these types of experiences make a lot of people lose sight of why they even started to do that thing to begin with, or why they enjoyed it before being seen as being good at it. So being able to resume something you once loved is really lovely. I hope one day i can paint again and enjoy it as well
I mean, wow 😮 the beauty in all of the details. The piano playing, the setting, and the changing colors of the lighting. What absolutely fascinated me was that your fingers and nail polish were reflected twice, once of off the fallboard and another off of the white keys themselves. I’m amazed that you could capture it all. I enjoyed a nice warm sound on a drizzly day for me. ☺️
The beauty of music is that nothing else matters in that moment. You play for yourself and you lose sense of the world beyond you and your musical creation....the next step of sharing that moment of creation is a mighty one and we are grateful for your decision. Now we can all lose ourselves for nine minutes and gently bob atop a gentle sea together.
Lovely. I remember setting this to be my first ever music ringtone on my first ever cell phone way back in 2004. One of those big old Nokias. Being sixteen at the time, not having much to worry about. Lots of memories associated with this piece. Thank you for this :)
I can't explain it, but this song has always reminded me of Salieri. Like an outsider looking in on the tragedy of a musician that started out loving music, but became warped as he learned to hate himself because he sees himself as mediocre, destroying himself in the process of trying to glimpse a transcendence he knows is out of his reach. Even in his jealous rage, he can't bring himself to destroy the thing that he once loved wholeheartedly. But the real tragedy is that Salieri doesn't realize what he thinks is transcendence doesn't really exist, no one could ever reach it, not even the one he envies with all his heart. He couldn't jealously guard his transcendence against everyone else out of spite, because it was never possible for anyone else to touch it either. And they don't want his anyway, they have their own to value. And the whole time, you wish you could reach into the movie and tell Salieri that real transcendence is possible and concrete. That to be transcendent is to embrace who you are, and to define yourself by what you love, instead of what you hate or what you wish you could be. When the Heideggers of the world flippantly retort that "happiness is overrated anyway," it's because they openly acknowledge that their goal has nothing to do with happiness and could never bring them any satisfaction, because it's lofty and untouchable. I don't know about anyone else, but I don't think that's a worthy trade.
"You don't have to be "the best" at something for it to be worth doing." damn, that hit me quite hard… I've actually been interested in learning the piano, but I was always kinda discouraged because I felt like I didn't really fit into it. My family doesn't have much to do with music, I'm already 18 years old, I have quite small hands, a piano teacher is quite expensive (but I might earn enough to afford one in my social year), and I worry I might lack the discipline to learn enough and become great. Still, it really fascinates me and I would love to learn how to play all the pieces that move me so much.
I work on my task as the autumn sun pours through the window, warming the chilly air in the room. The piece you're playing is sounding through my earpieces and despite being "at work", it is a peaceful, joyful feeling, to work alone on a big project at home, surrounded by nothing but the music, the sun, and some sleepy pets. Thank you for giving me this moment.
Satie is one of my favourite composers, I could sit there at my piano and play his gymnopedies and gnossiennes for hours. They are just so cozy and are wonderful for a rainy day :)
I've come to love "imperfect" performances in the last few years. First novels, musicians' early works, impromptu live performances, etc. Of course there's always something wonderful about a transcendently amazing performance by some virtuoso genius; but I've been listening to a lot more of people's turn-on-the-camera-and-mess-around videos, personal projects, high school musicians playing covers, very young classical musicians with raw talent spilling over but not yet the experience to refine the best parts of their sound. I think passion and personality sometimes show up better in the absence of technical perfection, that sometimes the experience is better when you can see the strings, so to speak--because the strings are also beautiful. And as a fellow musician who was the big fish in a small pond in high school and got a rude awakening when I went to college (for a cello performance degree I ultimately abandoned for economics), listening to and loving beautiful performances like this is helping me figure out how to find my way back to an unashamed love of my own imperfect performance. Thank you so much for this.
I started appreciating imperfect performances when I encountered too perfect performances. In choirs, the more people you have, the more the imperfections get smoothed out, and in digital choirs this goes to an extreme. If you take multiple thousands of people and synch their performances, you end up with singing that's just excessively perfect.
This is my favorite piece by Erik. When I first heard it, it put me in a bitter sweet trance remembering the joyful moments of my first relationship. For me this song encapsulated the emotions of nostalgia, and distills them into it purest essence. Really beautiful. Thank you for this.
I love Satie, it comes from a unique time in Parisian culture. So innocent, before the horror of the First World War. My family was musical, and I tried playing the trumpet, but couldn’t remember the fingering positions for the notes. I really worked hard on it, getting good as I could by rote memorization. We then moved to a different school where music was treated competitively like football. I found how under developed I was as a musician. I got the chance to play something outside of the cheap trumpet I had, and I gravitated to the French Horn. I really worked at improving my ability. I grew and got better to the point I was no longer the last chair. I earned the right to perform in the junior varsity band and travel to out of state performances. But at the end of all this the band director singled me out. I wasn’t allowed to perform in the junior varsity band, I was only allowed to perform in remedial music classes. I was gutted. In the end we moved and I didn’t perform during the next two different schools I went to….
I ironically had the same trajectory. Spending hundreds of hours in my teenage years mastering technique after technique purely out of a sense of sensational bewilderment. About the time that I had learned Chopin's Polonaise in F-Sharp minor (op.44) I realized that I was nowhere near good enough to be a concert pianist. I joined the military out of spite and regretted the way that I just 'threw it all away for years'. Now I have a yamaha upright piano that I play for my son and daughter and the odd guest who is over at my house. Thanks for this the story combined with Satie's melancholy is heartbreaking. Such a treasure ❤
I have often used Satie's 3 Gymnopédies to help me through anxiety and panic attacks and, separately, it fills my heart to see all of the people in the comments even months later
That piece reminds me of that memory I have, walking in Paris at night with my then-lover, in the heart of winter with snow gently falling and the cold breeze that felt warm for some reason. Thank you so much for that Natalie !
I absolutely love your main channel. I've played guitar self-taught since I was about 10, got into everything from blues onwards. Got into a bit of classical as well. I bought a keyboard a while back and the only thing I can play is a butchered version of Satie's Gnossienne no. 1, love the whole impressionist thing, Monet is my favourite artist. Seeing this is just amazing. Also, loved that version you had of Lacrymosa you had in one of your videos that was also perfect ASMR for me with the whispering, was searching endlessly for a version that I could listen to until someone FINALLY uploaded it to RUclips. Again, love everything you upload. Thank you, Natalie!
“I am much better at listening to music than I am at playing it” first of all, word. I feel the exact same way. second of all, YOU PLAYING IS EVERYTHING PERIOD ❤️ send tweet
yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm so glad you're finally posting full performances, natalie! i've always hoped you would do something like this! playing the piano is similarly something that i've always wanted to do and have done out of passion. i struggle with focus and motivation, though, and seeing you play despite your insecurities really helps me feel like i should still keep picking it back up and trying anyway. thanks for doing this.
The thing that makes Satie one of my favorite composers is how his peices often convey an emotion that is just indescribable. Not super melancholy, but not joyful, not depressed, but not manic either. You just know it, it's familiar, but what is it?
It feels to me like a house that is empty because you are either just moving in or just moving out. You're alone in a bittersweet moment between phases of your life, reflecting on what it all means.
@@appletree6898 Agree with appletree. To me, Satie is best described as reflective. It's like a neutral longing for peace, not out of sadness or looking for something better, but just appreciating the way things have existed, the way they exist now, and how they may exist in the future.
One of my favorite compositions of all time played by one of my favorite people. Thanks for posting a visual/auditory happy place, Natalie 🥲 You play absolutely beautifully by the way. Genuinely.
Jung also said "if possible never be afraid of going back to your first love" Natalie c'est magnifique merci!
2 года назад+13
I can relate to the sense of mediocrity... Being a musician myself I've also struggled with doubts about my abilities, everywhere I go I question my career choice and if I'm even worth anything. Is my music even something to be valued? I only know that without composing, I just wouldn't be able to live properly. I'd feel even more lost and depressed. Music gives me meaning and It's a way to put out all my inner thoughts and emotions, even though that is sometimes frowned upon in the contemporary scene. I'm glad you're putting yourself out there, although I'm sorry how you felt about your piano skills in college. We've all been there. I'm just glad you got to where you are now, providing the online community with such amazing and thoughtful content in a time where it's most needed. Thank you and keep up the good work, comrade
@@darlalathan6143 i sincerely hope you never give up on your art! Even if we find different jobs we should never feel that we have to quit making music, art, poetry etc! Neoliberalism is constantly deminishing our career choices and what we create is always put to question by those who do not think that art and music is important or worth anything... It's a grim and hollow reality we live in, where cynical and materialistic individualists control the discourse... Anyway, take care and good luck!! Do you post your art somewhere?
Playing the piano was the first thing I ever put my whole heart into. When I was a teenager, being a musician was my identity. I was one of the best in my school district, and I got used to being told how amazing I was. So I went to college for music in Boston, where, suddenly, I wasn't the best anymore. Not even close. There were 13 year olds who were better than me. I got discouraged, and dropped out after two years.
It was around that time I got interested in philosophy ("intellectual" often being the persona adopted by people who have failed at everything else). Though I eventually found success as a video essayist, for the last twelve years I've been haunted by that original sense of failure. The formative ego-wound. It's why I'm captivated by characters like Squidward and Salieri, "the patron saint of mediocrities." I hate the part of me that they remind me of.
If you try to bury the ugly parts of your mind, they end up directing your life from beyond your awareness. So like Jung says, it's best to remain on speaking terms with your own shadow.
I've been playing the piano again lately. It's one of the few things that I love so unironically I struggle to even talk about it. The word "amateur" originally meant "lover," a person who does something out of passion, not professionally. So despite its current sneering connotations, I think being an amateur is good, actually. You don't have to be "the best" at something for it to be worth doing.
But I do still struggle to play in front of other people, or to record myself. I'm much better at listening to music than I am at playing it, and I always hear the defects, everything that could be improved. I try to see the upside-recognizing the possibility for improvement gives you a reason get out of bed. What if one day I sat down at the piano and played perfectly? What then? What were there be left to to do? Just die I guess, like Nina in Black Swan.
Anyway here's some music by Erik Satie, a relatably drink-sodden and all-around not-perfect person, who still managed to write some languidly beautiful music.
oh wow I loved it and thank you for sharing this story aswell
I love your work, thank you for choosing to be vulnerable with your audience like this
That was beautiful, thank you for everything that you do
even if this only comes of as 1 of 100,000s of self-identified "simp"s, I really hope you're also able to hear the truth in those words. Surely not every single one of us that likes you is completely delusional, that would be statistically unlikely at best.
The courage to be openly amateur is under-appreciated. Being able to feel comfortable publicly embracing and celebrating those things that fall into the “sublime” or “beyond words” realms, and resonate with us on that core (possibly embarrassing) level, would improve all of our lives so much.
Satieposting
debussy-stuntin.
That's what we're gonna call any piano vid.
beautiful ; u ;
Translate to English
@@unknown6390 It's a play-on-words, referring to the musician "DeBussy" and when Natalie said she was "pussy-stuntin' on the gram'.
Translate to English: satieposting
as someone who had the same experience growing up being a musician and then getting to college and seeing how outclassed i was about to be, this is incredibly uplifting to take in. thank you.
Natalie, even some of the worlds top 20 concert pianists when listening back to their performances always critique what they should have done better or need to improve on. I think that that shows how much you care and it’s better to care then to feel you are already perfect and have no need for improvement. I think only a narcissistic person who’s a total douche would think that they are already perfect and need not work on their craft any longer so thanks for not being a total grandiose narcissist!!! What kinda piano do you have? If it’s not a Bosendorfer girl friend then the next time you are piano shopping you should look into a Bosendorfer. They are like the epitome of some of the best pianos in the world and yes you deserve the best!!!! Carry on Queen!!!!! Please keep playing for us mere mortals!!!! ♊️💜♾💯
♥️
I still very distinctly remember the time my piano teacher, this young Russian woman, who had always been exceedingly kind and patient with me, but of course still had me playing the classics first, handed me Satie's music for the first time. I instantly fell in love with his work, because it exemplified so much about the way I had always intuitively approached the piano: no fixed tempo, no obsession with formal patterns, just raw emotions from a deeply melancholic soul. Satie's music holds a very special place in my heart. Now I'm living a thousand miles away from my old home in my new home, a port town on Norway's west coast, studying for my master's, unable to afford my own piano, so I am very grateful for this in ways that hard to put into words. Since Satie's notation is so lose, there are a million ways to play his music, and your's speaks to very similar understanding that I've had. You don't need to be a professional to play satie well, you need to bring great emotionality into it. I love this very much and it brings me great joy to hear somebody I look up and helped me through their work realize I am non-binary, play these songs I love so dearly. Thank you, Natalie.
I love this comment, thank you for sharing
What a great tender soul You are. I had smiled fir all my 32 during reading your comment. Thank You so much for sharing.
Living in a Norwegian port town sounds like a dream. I hope you found a piano though 💛
The Marie Antoinette costume is just standing there, menancingly
I love how Natalies whole home reflects the rococo style of Marie Antoinette. It’s so beautiful
On the headless mannequin lmao
I just said out loud “aw, she’s got her little blood dress up in the background, that’s cute”, who else could trigger such a response, seriously??
It's the #colortheory , sweaty.
Poor rookie.
I got myself into a pretty weird place tonight, and a regal Lesbian playing Eric Satie on the piano turned out to be _exactly_ what I needed! Thank you!
You are right: This is perfect for an early morning after a long night of not sleeping and doing stuffstuffstuff that one could not recall the day after. Gives me a sense of ease and rest. Thank you!
We are all simps for Natalie here!
^
I thought she was American 👁👄👁
How can you tell she’s a lesbian. Lol
I love it when music puts you in a sort of trance and it feels like nothing else matters for a while
Blows my mind that Natalie can play the piano so well, be relentlessly funny, be incredibly well read and understand philosophy, be breathtakingly pretty and incredibly good at makeup and fashion and yet constantly make jokes about self-loathing.
I guess I can sympathize as a fellow hot person with low self esteem 😝
Maybe trying to discourage “ envy”,,,
“Envy, a case study”
What about rich and famous
Wow, aren't you just amazing.....
That's a libra for you ✨
Natalie, this is so dang awesome.
this guy gets it
this guy gets it
This guy gets it
this guy gets it
This gus gets it
I don't mean to sound like a simp, but I really appreciate everything Natalie does. I don't think she realizes how talented and smart she is.
there is no shame in simping or being a simp, you must embrace who you truly are
i agree. i love natalie
Im so tired of the word "simp." Now you are a simp for just appreciating someone's talent? Or is it telling them you appreciate their talent that makes you a simp? Idk, but the word has lost all meaning, along with karen, incel, chad, and dozens of other words. Ruined through over-use and mis-use
@@fullcourseyellow5940 hahaha In that case, I declare myself her simp
@@NickJorgenson-zp4oh I know, she's really funny, smart, gorgeous and talented. Wish I was like her
“You see? No shock. No engulfment. No tearing asunder. What you feared would come like an explosion is like a whisper. What you thought was the end is the beginning.” xx
I did not expect anyone in these comments to quote the Twilight Zone
@@Doktorlady girl, to be fair - we're all there.
I didn’t even know my mom could play piano until she started playing gymnopedies on our old piano one day like a few months ago. I don’t know why she waited till now to get back into it but it’s nice
Until I saw "a few months ago" I thought you were talking about Natalie, because of the type of mommy dommy comments people leave on her videos. I'm so sorry, I've been poisoned.
@@fruitygarlic3601 lmaooooo
@@fruitygarlic3601 Omgggg I can see how that would happen
@@fruitygarlic3601 haha wouldn't blame you
Wonderfully melancholy song to listen to on the toilet or while thinking about an ex. Thank you, Natalie
Bruh if the toilet makes you feel the same as breaking up with someone, you really need some fiber or to cut down on red meat or something
@@skeetsmcgrew3282 I mean they are breaking up with their poop
@@ahzayoc1207 Too bad you can't flush your exes
@@TheGIGACapitalist Sometimes, it hurts because your exes are not the ones that deserves to be flushed. 🥲
I guess you're feeling down... in the dumps!
she's beauty, she's grace, she's ContraPlays
No one asked but the Trois Gymnipédies helped me through a lot of my grief after my dad's death early this year. Now that I'm (kinda sorta) starting to come out of that grief, it's lovely to have a pleasant context around it.
It's bittersweet, but thank you, Natalie. This was wonderful.
💕
That's something i really love about music with no words. it allows everyone to attach their own experiences and emotions to a piece every time they hear it. I'm sorry to hear about your father, and I am glad you could enjoy this.
I have a kitten. Her name is Milkyway and she's one year old now! Usually she is easily bored, yelling at me lots and zooming around when she isn't sleeping.
When I put this video on, she sat down in front of the TV screen and attentivsly watched. She sat there quietly the whole video through.
Now I put it on for her again and she immediately climbed to a spot on her cat tree where she can see it well while making a nappy face.
Seem's like she enjoys Satie!
Satie for Kitty
Simping is a valid response to the enormity of Natalie's talent.
Is it really simping if she’s anything but mediocre?
Every Child can learn this quickly
I love Natalie and enjoyed this performance a lot, but surely this is not a piece that requires that much talent to play well?
@@globaldigitaldirectsubsidi4493 she did play some Goldberg Variations in one of her videos. That requires some talent. And she went to music college for a while I believe.
If its wrong I don't wanna be right
Reminding me that I'd really like to learn how to play the piano so *I* can sit in a dramatically lit room and play out my feelings.
Tbh, this is how I got through seasonal affective disorder as a teenager. Only problem is, if you're feeling bad at 3am, you get yelled at for waking everyone up.
@@AviatorLily lol now that you mention it, I do remember doing that and waking family members up
Yes, the existence of amateurs is wonderful. The world of possible human striving belongs to us all. The only qualification you need to participate is passion!
One of the things I've always loved about Satie is that his music reveals more about the person performing it than it ever could about the person who composed it in the first place. A grand enigma, I consider his nearest parallel in modern music to be Trent Reznor.
Wish I could click "love" on this video instead of just "like".
This is the first song I ever was completely transfixed by. I think I was probably 11 or 12, and my music class teacher asked us to draw what came to mind when we heard this song, I never knew the name of the song but upon hearing it over 15 years later I suddenly was able to figure out it was the same song I heard when I was young.
Thanks for sharing this, Natalie.
What did you draw back then ?
@@Kidomaru222 a man in a pink Lycra suit. His expression: pure pain.
Robert W thank ~you~ for sharing this adorable anecdote 🥺
It’s not a song, it’s a music piece. A song requiers vocal melody and lyrics
@@Kidomaru222 probably a Lesbian Marie Antoinette
Erik Satie is one of my favorite composers and historical figures. The fact that Contra put together a whole stream setup to play his most famous piece warms my cold, rotting, forsaken heart.
All our gods have abandoned us, but at least we have Natalie the demigothess.
My music history course is just going over him, he’s seriously awesome.
I dropped out of Berklee too when I got discouraged over not being the best anymore. thank you for making me feel like its ok to try again. this touched my heart deeply.
I grew up to the sound of my mother playing Satie on the piano. Hearing this brings me back and makes me miss the simpler times of childhood
This just shows how much effort and hard work ContraPoints puts into her videos. Not only is she playing beautifully, the set, the lighting the costume, everything is beautiful as so well thought out. Well done!
Also, this has the same feel as the lofi/hip-hop streams.
I don't think this is a set... it's just her house. I don't think that is a costume per se, either. The lighting is just a colour changing lamp thingy, but is nice, and yes the playing is lovely, along with the rest of it.
Things would have been arranged a bit though, yes.
@@henryanderson6752 that's not surprising; this collection of songs is often regarded as the ancestor to modern ambient music!
@@Siberius- The fact that it's someone's house just makes it even more awesome.
Natalie, You have a special talent for finding and communicating beauty. Even as you speak of horrible people doing horrible things, you keep a core of beauty in your world. I’m sure you listen back to these and just hear how you would do it slightly differently next time, but honestly the gesture we see is something stunning and otherworldly. I hope you can keep doing the things that you want, the way that you want, because you’re showing thousands of people something they didn’t know they wanted to see. This is good work.
Wow this is so true! Beauty transcends in all things but it takes someone like Natalie to really show it to its full potential.
Wow you really said it. You put the unidentified feeling I have into words!
For me, Satie's Gymnopédies have such a tension of anticipation, expecting the next note or chord and having it come just the slightest hint later than would be comfortable. Your tempo and musical choices here are so expressive and expectant, beautifully done!
I love hearing the slightly different times the notes come in on the chords every measure. You never know which one is going to land first.
"At no point can you seize the musical experience and hold it. Unlike that moment in a film when a still shot suddenly immobilizes a complete scene, a single musical moment immobilized makes audible only one chord, which in itself is comparatively meaningless. This never-ending flow of music forces us to use our imaginations, for music is in a continual state of becoming." (Aaron Copeland Music and Imagination) Technical prowess is overrated. What makes a true musical talent is the ability to channel emotion into each note, sparking the imagination of the listener so both heart and mind experience the story. What makes an extraordinatry talent is the ability to write those stories yourself. I loved evey moment of this. I would love to hear what your story sounds like.
My 8 month old woke up screaming. Took a while to calm her down and go back to bed. This music helped me unwind afterwards. Thank you.
totally on board with contraplays. this was beautiful.
Natalie knowing someone who at the end advocates for compassion and understanding have so much success, inspires me.
Thank you for always moving forward despite everything, you're an incredible human being.
🥺 agreed
Literally one thing in the world could stop me from seeing this live and it was a wedding. This is a beautiful way to end such a beautiful day
I'm so destroyed by anxiety, i needed this.
i feel u
I feel that so much. I was struggling bad with anxiety today as well (hell, the past month has been rough…) we’re fortunate to have moments of reprieve like this
I'm sorry you're going through this. Hope you feel better soon.
good vibes to you, friend 💞
if anyone else would like ‘em, come get your free good vibes here: 💖💞💗💖💞💗💖
Currently in the midst of a panic attack and while this isn't a cure or anything, it sure does help. Thank god for Natalie
Contra Plays: Beats to study/vibe to
I grew up with a piano at home because my father was an enthusiast. All these years later I took up piano (I’m 36). My father asked me why. I told him I realized recently that you don’t have to be good at something to do it, you should do it because you want to. You’re playing is as good as any I’ve heard recorded.
As a former musician with "potential", I understand this struggle. But your performance, "flaws" and all, is made more beautiful by the effort and courage it takes to face and cleanse the ego-wound. Bravo.
I’ve missed the music playing. Thanks for sharing this 🙏
I am so glad she's playing again! 🥰
The blood soaked gown from Envy in the background!!
I'm kinda sad right now, going through some stuff. So I fixed myself a cup of tea while listening to this and I feel understood.
Thanks, Natalie!
You are understood, friend.
I have felt this way for so long after finishing my music degree but it felt terrible voicing it to anyone, even non-musicians. Thank you.
more like ContraKeyzzz! amazing playing. satie's never been this sapphic
no it’s not more like that
This is one of my favorite pieces. I love Satie so much. Him, Debussy. Okay, I might be a simp for late 19th and early 20th century French impressionist composers.
I mean at this point who isn't
Then you must be in love with Ravel!
impressionism slaps
Yea bitch same
I had a few bad days, but tonight I have listened "Clair de Lune" and "Gymnopedie no. 1" and I got better, it's like I needed this... Peace, thank you Natalie❤️
As somebody who plays the piano actively for 10 years, this really is amazing. Not a single mistake and in a single take, you truly are a musician. Not making mistakes in piano takes confidence, each note absolute as soon as it is hit, it is a confidence I would like to have myself.
This was... Saties-factory 😎
I was sketching and got this pleasant, soothing, motivating surprise as a notification.
You’re awesome, Nat.
Natalie, I’ve known you were a fan of “classical” music for a while because of the amazing soundtracks to your video essays, but I’m so happy to hear that you decided to start playing piano again. Please keep going. I want to hear you play Mozart sonatas, Chopin nocturnes, Debussy miniatures, and whatever other music YOU want to play... as a fellow pianist/musician, it makes me so happy to know that one of my favorite thinkers/essayists shares my love and passion for music. This was so cool.
Listened to this sat on my roof, eating lunch and watching the trees sway in the breeze. Life's been so stressful lately, so it was a lovely moment. Thank you Natalie.
Ah yes the perfect soundtrack to the end of a 10 hour shift. Honestly keep posting these kinds of videos, love this.
Lovely. Just want you to know you're awesome Nyatalie. Thanks for existing at this time and age.
Amazing how the most intelligent, beautiful and accomplished people fixate on their “failures.”
From the areas you’ve shown us of your new places I am in LOVE with your decor. It’s almost like a slightly 90’s inspired middle-class style of restrained opulence. I love it
I've been waiting for ContraPlays 😍
Es tan relajante verla tocar.
Amo todo lo que hace, sinceramente.
I had a similar experience, but with visual arts.
Even though i knew i wasn't super great I was always praised as a child and told how gifted I was, then my art school sent me to a national contest one time and i completely blew it and saw so many far younger students there outperform me like it was nothing. after that I felt these unrealistic expectations from my teachers become a crushing weight more than anything positive or flattering. It felt as if I not only couldn't be as good as the kids at these national competitions, but I didn't even feel as good as I was told I was before when i could believe that i was doing alright.
Art became a chore and a race and i stopped painting as i wasn't enjoying the process anymore, because of being so fixated on needing to be better. I hear these types of experiences make a lot of people lose sight of why they even started to do that thing to begin with, or why they enjoyed it before being seen as being good at it.
So being able to resume something you once loved is really lovely.
I hope one day i can paint again and enjoy it as well
Sitting on a stoop in SF waiting for a ride. This is soothing and perfectly fits the mood. Thank you!
One of my favorite classical songs!
I mean, wow 😮 the beauty in all of the details. The piano playing, the setting, and the changing colors of the lighting. What absolutely fascinated me was that your fingers and nail polish were reflected twice, once of off the fallboard and another off of the white keys themselves. I’m amazed that you could capture it all. I enjoyed a nice warm sound on a drizzly day for me. ☺️
Came for the piano years ago, stayed for it. All things return, and nature heals. Thanks, Natalie.
The beauty of music is that nothing else matters in that moment. You play for yourself and you lose sense of the world beyond you and your musical creation....the next step of sharing that moment of creation is a mighty one and we are grateful for your decision. Now we can all lose ourselves for nine minutes and gently bob atop a gentle sea together.
Hey Natalie, the way you express yourself means a lot to me, it helped me get through my PhD, thanks ❤️
Lovely. I remember setting this to be my first ever music ringtone on my first ever cell phone way back in 2004. One of those big old Nokias. Being sixteen at the time, not having much to worry about. Lots of memories associated with this piece. Thank you for this :)
I can't explain it, but this song has always reminded me of Salieri.
Like an outsider looking in on the tragedy of a musician that started out loving music, but became warped as he learned to hate himself because he sees himself as mediocre, destroying himself in the process of trying to glimpse a transcendence he knows is out of his reach. Even in his jealous rage, he can't bring himself to destroy the thing that he once loved wholeheartedly. But the real tragedy is that Salieri doesn't realize what he thinks is transcendence doesn't really exist, no one could ever reach it, not even the one he envies with all his heart. He couldn't jealously guard his transcendence against everyone else out of spite, because it was never possible for anyone else to touch it either. And they don't want his anyway, they have their own to value.
And the whole time, you wish you could reach into the movie and tell Salieri that real transcendence is possible and concrete. That to be transcendent is to embrace who you are, and to define yourself by what you love, instead of what you hate or what you wish you could be. When the Heideggers of the world flippantly retort that "happiness is overrated anyway," it's because they openly acknowledge that their goal has nothing to do with happiness and could never bring them any satisfaction, because it's lofty and untouchable.
I don't know about anyone else, but I don't think that's a worthy trade.
This is beautiful, Natalie
Thank you
oh my god, Natalie. this is one of my favorite piano pieces ever. you have no idea how happy this makes me.
Just played this in my dorm room and felt the most blissful since I started college
"You don't have to be "the best" at something for it to be worth doing." damn, that hit me quite hard… I've actually been interested in learning the piano, but I was always kinda discouraged because I felt like I didn't really fit into it. My family doesn't have much to do with music, I'm already 18 years old, I have quite small hands, a piano teacher is quite expensive (but I might earn enough to afford one in my social year), and I worry I might lack the discipline to learn enough and become great. Still, it really fascinates me and I would love to learn how to play all the pieces that move me so much.
I work on my task as the autumn sun pours through the window, warming the chilly air in the room. The piece you're playing is sounding through my earpieces and despite being "at work", it is a peaceful, joyful feeling, to work alone on a big project at home, surrounded by nothing but the music, the sun, and some sleepy pets. Thank you for giving me this moment.
I'd love to see more music. I really liked your cover of Gold Dust Woman too.
You should see her belt out "The Time Warp". Riff Raff (a handyman) would be proud!
Satie is one of my favourite composers, I could sit there at my piano and play his gymnopedies and gnossiennes for hours. They are just so cozy and are wonderful for a rainy day :)
This has unexpectedly improved my night. Thank you.
I've come to love "imperfect" performances in the last few years. First novels, musicians' early works, impromptu live performances, etc. Of course there's always something wonderful about a transcendently amazing performance by some virtuoso genius; but I've been listening to a lot more of people's turn-on-the-camera-and-mess-around videos, personal projects, high school musicians playing covers, very young classical musicians with raw talent spilling over but not yet the experience to refine the best parts of their sound. I think passion and personality sometimes show up better in the absence of technical perfection, that sometimes the experience is better when you can see the strings, so to speak--because the strings are also beautiful. And as a fellow musician who was the big fish in a small pond in high school and got a rude awakening when I went to college (for a cello performance degree I ultimately abandoned for economics), listening to and loving beautiful performances like this is helping me figure out how to find my way back to an unashamed love of my own imperfect performance. Thank you so much for this.
I started appreciating imperfect performances when I encountered too perfect performances. In choirs, the more people you have, the more the imperfections get smoothed out, and in digital choirs this goes to an extreme. If you take multiple thousands of people and synch their performances, you end up with singing that's just excessively perfect.
This is my favorite piece by Erik. When I first heard it, it put me in a bitter sweet trance remembering the joyful moments of my first relationship. For me this song encapsulated the emotions of nostalgia, and distills them into it purest essence.
Really beautiful. Thank you for this.
I love the French modernists
We stan a sight reading goddess
I love Satie, it comes from a unique time in Parisian culture. So innocent, before the horror of the First World War. My family was musical, and I tried playing the trumpet, but couldn’t remember the fingering positions for the notes. I really worked hard on it, getting good as I could by rote memorization. We then moved to a different school where music was treated competitively like football. I found how under developed I was as a musician. I got the chance to play something outside of the cheap trumpet I had, and I gravitated to the French Horn. I really worked at improving my ability. I grew and got better to the point I was no longer the last chair. I earned the right to perform in the junior varsity band and travel to out of state performances. But at the end of all this the band director singled me out. I wasn’t allowed to perform in the junior varsity band, I was only allowed to perform in remedial music classes. I was gutted. In the end we moved and I didn’t perform during the next two different schools I went to….
I ironically had the same trajectory. Spending hundreds of hours in my teenage years mastering technique after technique purely out of a sense of sensational bewilderment. About the time that I had learned Chopin's Polonaise in F-Sharp minor (op.44) I realized that I was nowhere near good enough to be a concert pianist. I joined the military out of spite and regretted the way that I just 'threw it all away for years'.
Now I have a yamaha upright piano that I play for my son and daughter and the odd guest who is over at my house. Thanks for this the story combined with Satie's melancholy is heartbreaking. Such a treasure ❤
Natalie just posts this as if I needed YET ANOTHER reason for simping her. Really beautiful music❤
That was beautiful, Natalie. My cat enjoyed it, too. We had a chill time listening to you play. 😸 💖
I have often used Satie's 3 Gymnopédies to help me through anxiety and panic attacks and, separately, it fills my heart to see all of the people in the comments even months later
Young lady; that version was uniquely you, and one only you could bring to this world. Sublime!
-Thanks.
One of my favorite pieces! And she plays Morrowind? I’m so happy I discovered her!
Please make more classical videos in the future! Love love love!!!
Hauntingly beautiful.
Thank you.
It made me cry and I don't even know why.
That piece reminds me of that memory I have, walking in Paris at night with my then-lover, in the heart of winter with snow gently falling and the cold breeze that felt warm for some reason. Thank you so much for that Natalie !
This is healing in a way I cannot articulate. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your considerable talents.
I absolutely love your main channel. I've played guitar self-taught since I was about 10, got into everything from blues onwards. Got into a bit of classical as well. I bought a keyboard a while back and the only thing I can play is a butchered version of Satie's Gnossienne no. 1, love the whole impressionist thing, Monet is my favourite artist. Seeing this is just amazing.
Also, loved that version you had of Lacrymosa you had in one of your videos that was also perfect ASMR for me with the whispering, was searching endlessly for a version that I could listen to until someone FINALLY uploaded it to RUclips. Again, love everything you upload. Thank you, Natalie!
“I am much better at listening to music than I am at playing it” first of all, word. I feel the exact same way. second of all, YOU PLAYING IS EVERYTHING PERIOD ❤️ send tweet
3rd movement is my favourite of this piece, the slight dissonance reminds me of the more strange tones in saties work, like in the gnosienes
yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm so glad you're finally posting full performances, natalie! i've always hoped you would do something like this! playing the piano is similarly something that i've always wanted to do and have done out of passion. i struggle with focus and motivation, though, and seeing you play despite your insecurities really helps me feel like i should still keep picking it back up and trying anyway. thanks for doing this.
The thing that makes Satie one of my favorite composers is how his peices often convey an emotion that is just indescribable. Not super melancholy, but not joyful, not depressed, but not manic either. You just know it, it's familiar, but what is it?
Nostalgia
It feels to me like a house that is empty because you are either just moving in or just moving out. You're alone in a bittersweet moment between phases of your life, reflecting on what it all means.
@@appletree6898 Agree with appletree. To me, Satie is best described as reflective. It's like a neutral longing for peace, not out of sadness or looking for something better, but just appreciating the way things have existed, the way they exist now, and how they may exist in the future.
@@professionallabelmaker744 Yes!!
Liminal?
One of my favorite compositions of all time played by one of my favorite people. Thanks for posting a visual/auditory happy place, Natalie 🥲
You play absolutely beautifully by the way. Genuinely.
just checked this channel after seeing your twitter thread. that was fast
Would give my life for a piano practice stream
Contrapoints chose to post this masterpiece on the same day as my birthday. I consider this a gift from the queen herself. ♥️♥️♥️
Happy belated birthday 🎂
Thanks 😊
Jung also said "if possible never be afraid of going back to your first love" Natalie c'est magnifique merci!
I can relate to the sense of mediocrity... Being a musician myself I've also struggled with doubts about my abilities, everywhere I go I question my career choice and if I'm even worth anything. Is my music even something to be valued?
I only know that without composing, I just wouldn't be able to live properly. I'd feel even more lost and depressed. Music gives me meaning and It's a way to put out all my inner thoughts and emotions, even though that is sometimes frowned upon in the contemporary scene.
I'm glad you're putting yourself out there, although I'm sorry how you felt about your piano skills in college. We've all been there. I'm just glad you got to where you are now, providing the online community with such amazing and thoughtful content in a time where it's most needed. Thank you and keep up the good work, comrade
I feel the same way about art!
@@darlalathan6143 i sincerely hope you never give up on your art! Even if we find different jobs we should never feel that we have to quit making music, art, poetry etc!
Neoliberalism is constantly deminishing our career choices and what we create is always put to question by those who do not think that art and music is important or worth anything...
It's a grim and hollow reality we live in, where cynical and materialistic individualists control the discourse...
Anyway, take care and good luck!! Do you post your art somewhere?
The first Gymnopedie was always a favorite of mine to play. It sounds even more romantic with you and your gorgeous set enhancing the vibe. Dreamlike.
What a lovely thing to wake up to. Thank you for sharing!
Natalie & Satie...