Key & Peele - Sexy Vampires
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- Опубликовано: 30 окт 2013
- The latest initiate in a den of sexy vampires expresses some concerns about how the rest of the gang conducts itself.
About Key & Peele:
Key & Peele showcases the fearless wit of stars Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele as the duo takes on everything from "Gremlins 2" to systemic racism. With an array of sketches as wide-reaching as they are cringingly accurate, the pair has created a bevy of classic characters, including Wendell, the players of the East/West Bowl and President Obama's Anger Translator.
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#KeyandPeele 
Приколы
![[adult swim] - Smiling Friends Season 2 Episode 5 Promo](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/uStNEeR8LT4/mqdefault.jpg)
"Girl, for real, you need to get your hands up off me before I fuck you up."
Ilija Milutin No worries, bruh, I think he was just trying to build the sexual tension.
Bruh I'm done😂😂
you fucker
Lol "shit is nasty, creepy as fuck."
+TheBlessedPotato potatoes have dicks ? wtf @_@
“I only got bit so I can live forever and see future cars!” That is now the only legitimate reason to become a vampire.
you said now twice in that sentence, it looks ridiculous!
skuntt skuntt SHIT
My man Got his priorities straight
That and also so you don’t get all wrinkly and decrepit from age.
HindsightPOV Nope.
Key & Peel should appear in "What we do in the Shadows" as these characters
YES YES
Damn it i was thinking about it the whole time
Time to email bomb the creator
Word
Or a Spinoff
I like how the normal person they were gonna eat was just chilling at the house afterwards
She got turned, which is priceless
"If we gonna eat, then let's eat. Damn."
Me at a family reunion.
Amen !
Me at an abortion clinic
@@turq1824 yes, but noooo
SAAAAAAAAAME
Same bro
the fact he got bit and still kept his inner gangsta is priceless.
Holysmoke96 he’s just black. He’s not a “gangster”
i meant his inner self maintained the same....@@matttheamerican3766
A true Brujah
well of course. you dont automatically turn into a goth over sexualized person when bitten...kinda of the point of the video
@@matttheamerican3766 he's both
Jordan's gut sticking out while everyone was so sexy had me laughing so hard.
Lies again? Blood DNA USD SGD
Thanks for making me feel subconscious about my gut
The fresh Prince of Transylvania😂😂😂😂
Jeez right 🤣
I whistled for a cab and when it came near the driver couldn’t see his reflection in the mirror
"This is such bullshit you guys." -When your friends aren't into Goth anymore.
I don't know why it's only just now occurring to me that someone might outgrow Goth culture. Hmm.
Lead vampire:Bring in the newest members of our family. (Female vampire accidently brings in the Frog Brothers from The Lost Boys) Edger:Good night,bloodsuckers! Alan:First come,first staked!
Right? LOL! ". . . and are you two EVEN lesbians?" (poseurs look like kids busted doing something wrong) "Actually . . . I have a boyfriend." This sketch is underrated - K is great here.
Actually, this is more Emo than Goth. I am an Elder Goth and stayed with the subculture for years. Was NEVER like this. I am more like Neil Gaiman's Death character: upbeat and happy with a dark/sarcastic sense of humor. Those that take the subculture and themselves too seriously either don't stay or drive everyone else absolutely "batty" (and tend not to make/keep friends)...because they act so elitist.
ZombieMommy I'm goth as well. I was simply joking lol. I agree with your sentiments. :-)
"And this song has been playing for like 2 years and it SUCKS"
I died 😂😂
I'm replying so you can see your likes. Was such a bright idea to copy paste that,
Is that Milana Vayntrub?
@@GuppiAttack I thought the same thing. I think it is!
Every retail place ever. 😭
The only legitimate reaction to Justin Bieber
I actually kinda like this song... But if I heard it for two years straight, I'm sure I'd lose my ever-loving vampire mind. 😆
What is the name of this song
😂😂😂😂😂
4:07 see that? That's attention to detail, didn't off her when they feast, so she turned and is now with them. Neat
Thinking about it, if they kept doing that, wouldn't they just keep ending up with more and more mouths to feed? They'd have to kill some of them, or have the ability to bite someone and not infect.
@@PrutteHans In most vampire stories, a vampire has to drain a victim to death and then feed the victim some of the vampire's blood. The 'one bite and you turn' method is usually reserved for werewolves and zombies
Kinda looks more like a thrall.
But I don’t know enough about vampire logic to be certain
@@Linosek279 what's a thrall..?
@ozlemashi Miamoto
Someone enslaved to a vampire via some sort of magic/ mindfuckery.
That blonde girl is either a damn good actress, or they pulled some random girl of the street and put her with these people, cos she looks genuinely scared.
I honestly felt uncomfortable for her.
Right, it was too real for a comedy.
It's their hot ass stinky breath is why she looks genuinely mortified
Yesss! Lmao
Easy. My husband would pretend hes a vampire and I get scared shit less and start kicking him away from me. Just imagination guys not acting.
"I got bit on purpose so I can live foreverandseefuture cars" -genius
shit if your gonna live forever might as well for a good reason
I lived forever to get rid of the Joestar bloodline but I'm glad I at least get all the blood I need - Dio
You won’t see many future cars when you are a vampire because you can’t go outside when the sun is up
@@jobrotelis6664 Depends on what myth or franchise you base the vampire on ;)
@@jobrotelis6664 First off what that other guy said, depends on what vampire lore you're going with. And last I checked cars still work at night.
"These O negatives taste like pennies" seems pretty accurate for being an O- type.
I would assume O- would taste the best as its the best blood type anyway. Not only does it make you more resilient to heart attacks it also the only blood you can donate to anyone.
I understand why you'd think that but in reality you'd be better off with a Diabetic type B . It's more commonly available and it's much sweeter. Unless your looking for more nutrients and less metallic tasting, in that case go with a type A fresh from the sweatest blood drive you can find.
I'm 0 positive and mine is like gold 😂😂
The fact that Jordan became a successful horror director it's crazy, he's so versatile
this must have been really awkward to film
Skel etor --Piff :D who dont like dress-up and being silly
+DJDeezy ThaTruth And licking each other.
Ikr
+Zaphod “Memelord” Beeblebrox the kinda sketch that ends with the director saying "Uh, cut, I guess" and then the filming crew goes home and just feels weird and they spend the rest of the day sitting at a table and staring off into the middle distance.
+Zaphod “Memelord” Beeblebrox I believe you have forgot your towel, you're screwed now
They look like rebellious teens who just watched the vampire diaries
No that's just my mom
Dead ☠️
I mean yeah, that's what its parodying...
Chickenstrips Goop lmao
I just love how they're not even biting her, just breathing heavily and sticking their tongues out!! LOL!!!
This was hands down my favorite Key & Peele skit 😂😂😂 "Opheliaaaa, bring the new blood" that line had me in a chokehold back in the day 😂
I know. And then Tyrell walks in 😂😂😂
I just love the idea of someone very practical becoming a vampire and not giving into hedonism. Just carrying on as normal without dying
so Keanu Reeves
Hard to live a normal life when you can't see sunlight
@@Dremons7 Pretty sure many peopel wouldn't have that much of a problem with that part.
@Dremons no one banned the nightlife tho
You’re describing the vampire dad from twilight
"I got bit up so I can see future cars" XD
I got bit up so i could watch ALL the Marvel movies!!!
I would get bit so I could play future games
+Kijuan Johnson I would get bit just to listen to future.
I got bit up so that I can see sunrise and sunset a million times!!!!
Noah Vining )272$$2
Part of me feels like Peele makes up these characters and sketches just to be able to flaunt a fabulous-looking manicure.
"Seriously, you got to get your hands off me before I f*&k you up!" Lmfao. Boi, if I saw some shit like this in the movies, I would've died lol.
"No wonder y'all hungry all the time" hahaha its ridiculous how they waste so much blood on the chin
"Its not even that funny"... hahahahah
Yea. I honestly don’t think one human could feed 9 vampires since they usually drain their victims to death
deez nuts were wasting so much blood on your chin.
I would watch a full series based on this
The chill vampire diaries
What we do in the shadows
@@mariagherman5421 thats not hip hop vampires though
Me too
@@mariagherman5421 yup, basically if what we do in the shadows was about black americans
Moral of the Story:
If you're in a vampire coven that's belong to a straight-to-video Queen of the Damned sequel,
*never invite a hypebeast guest.*
I don't get the "Hypebeast" things that pertains to this video. He's actually going against the trend. Do you even know what the definition of "Hypebeast" is???
I can't get enough of that OphEliAaaA bring the new blood and that vampire acting part.. so ON POINT
"I got bit so I could live forever and see future cars."
That is the exact reason I want to be immortal lmfao. That and so I can witness the cyberpunk future.
***** Wasn't the cyberpunk future back in the early 2000's? I mean the people who though that up in the 80's, that would be the future for them. But it already happened in Japan and Europe back in the early 2000's. hmm.
Will Homan
Nah, everyone is just a bunch of tools.
That's a bit rich
Will Homan Wait i thought cyberpunk future was during the industrial revolution
Uncrowned No that is wrong.
If the fresh prince of bel air was a vampire.
Exactly!
I was thinking the same thing
it T.I. was a vampire
Qwerty Bastard In a casket is where I spent most of my days
Ha! Right? I was thinking the same thing . . . "K is workin' some early Will Smith HARD! . . . "
Literally the vampires in the Blade movies😭😭
That girl acted her heart out lol. She looked like she was thinking of dead puppies to get those results LOL.
The victim girl is an amazing actress! So pitiable
Lol pitiful
@Valerie W Pitiable is correct as well.😊
That's just a random college student after they look at their debt.
@@Alovatololo I'm feeli.. Feeling woozy 😨
666 likes wahhahahahaha
73 year old lady here, laying in bed squealing with laughter at 7:00 am.
Toni Bauer 😂😂
Spending your time wisely, no denying that haha.
You my friend,are living the good life.
Good morning 😊
never too old to enjoy Key and Peele
😄😄😄😄
That blonde girl looked genuinely terrified to be there
I extremely love how they both match in every-single costume, wig, makeup, whatever, totally a new character and a new person lol
His name ain't even Tristan 😂😂😂
@@CRACKBONE7317 bruh 🤣
has the same energy as “they don’t even have dental” from shrek
"I got bit on purpose so I could live forever and see future cars!"
Bill Volk super flying dope lamborghinis
Bill Volk we all watched it...
And now we're bonding over it.
Bill Volk Don't you have people in real life to bond with?
I do that too, but according to your logic you don't have people in real life to bond with, so you have my condolences.
The blonde girl didn’t even have to act, people hissing around you would be genuinely terrifying
"I got bit on purpose so I can live forever see future cars" is the best reason I've heard to become immortal
I'm just wearing what I got bit in - hahahahahahahahaha!
🤣🤣🤣🤣
You're welcome for making it 666 likes
@RANDI BRADLEY I'm also trying to figure that out, like that's the only part I didn't think was a joke
@@SirHanzVon tone & delivery. Don't over think it
😂😂😂
This is so accurate! lol I always wonder why everything sexual with vampires lol
It's because the original Dracula novel by Bram stoker had themes of sexuality where the female vampires were seductive and sexual while the untouched female characters were pure and maternal.
The M7 Omega m
I thought twiglight started it
Lots of Freudian stuff about puncturing a sensitive part of the human body and sharing fluids
I wish we just got a historically accurate movie about Vlad Dracul the defender of Walliachia knight of the order of the dragon scourge of the Ottoman Empire impaler of khabab
Finally, someone had the (immortal) guts to address the fact that most vampires and their feedings are being portrayed as sexual, and it’s totally ridiculous and desperate and corny
This show never ceases to amaze me with just how brilliant it is
The CREATIVITY is so high
Definitely one of my favorite skits of their's
I love how the guy's "normalness" kept breaking up the fantasy.
And I love that line 'This song has been playing for 2 yrs and it sucks!'
Nipple play for private time, we talked about this like 20 minutes ago girl 😂
I was wondering if anyone else caught that lmaoooo
Bruh when
Disregard that i was only halfway through
This is how I imagine originals, vampire diaries and twilight is like.
Lily (AT&T girl) is in this skit. 🔥🔥
That feeding scene must have been so awkward to film, especially so for the blonde girl.
the ever dumb derp. it is called Acting! They were all hired...to act. Dumb Derp.
Omg I'm dying from the stupidity of the top comment I wish I was in that"awkward" situation lolol
taylor0000027 amen. XD
Kudos to her for acting the part well, actually. :)
***** No kidding it's acting dipshit. Doesn't mean it's not awkward for them. Like where the fuck did you find that logic?
"touchin my nipple for 15 minutes"
I fuckin died xD
+The Ultra-Gamer "Nipple play is for private time. We talked about it."
ULTRA STOP FOLLOWING ME!!!!!
Same brony!
***** If you are trying to imply that I should die, I can only assume it's because you are butthurt over my profile picture.
And if it isn't I'm sorry, but I always assume it is.
rainbow fairy
Kudos on the "feast" girl she kept it together actually seemed scared
He's just staying gangsta in the midst of vampires...respect.
"girl you better get your hands up off me before I **** you up"
...that shit is nasty .creepy as fuck
YOU’VE BEEN TOUCHING MY NIPPLE FOR 15 MINUTES
"All the [bleep] y'all is doin up in here. This is straight-up gratuitous."
"This a mansion there's gotta be other rooms for you to do that shit"😂
*YOU. ARE. EVERYWHERE.*
“Are you even lesbians??” *girl shakes her head*
my god
yeah, we saw the video. You don't have to write it.
+Miguel Reyes then scroll past then dumbass nobody has a gun to your head making you read this shit and why even comment on it are you really that sad and lonely
3:07 my favoritest part!
"His name ain't even Tristan" hit so hard for no reason.
'His name ain't even Tristan' LMAO
Mine is lel
.
***** Hiya!
scaperty65 :o
The ending is priceless
"I got bit on purpose so i could live forever and see future cars" that is Genius XD
0:27 His hair is luxurious
the ending made this wrap up together so perfectly, these guys are geniuses
"His name ain't even Tristin". LOL
Christopher Quinn Tristan
Lot of people seem to have missed this awesome pun. ...his name isn't even interesting!
cyberguroo nah there’s no pun and if there was it would be shit
My wife and I say “ Opheliaaaaa” constantly for no reason and it confuses people
This is love.
@@Mona-uc4lf damn that was brutal son :')
That’s cute.
😂
Confucion
This is my fave skit of them.
These two need a cameo in “What we do in the shadows”.
Love that part when he said " I will fuck you up, you've been touching my nipples for 15 minutes..." true black vampires.
🤣🤣
"I got bit on purpose so I can live forever and see future cars"
Thanks. I heard him say that too.
"Did any of that actually get in your mouth?"
I'm dead😂
This sketch was the one that made me discover Key & Peele here in Spain. They absolutely rock!
The blonde was a good actress.
I think she's Olivia Snow Norman? I'm not sure though. But this girl *really* looks like her.
Edit: This is definitely Olivia Norman. She's credited for this on IMDB.
R S I don't usually say this but she's cute though 😅
spacetownjams where'd you get that pfp of Melanie?
She's cute as hell too.
2:35 “Did any of that, actually get in yo mouf.” 💀
Tell me why i reached this comment as soon as he said this lmfao
But like, seriously tho, why they so messy?👀
“What are we wearing here”? 💀😂
I agree with Key. I wanna see future cars too.
"If we gone eat, then let's eat", that's what I say when the prayer before the meal taking too long.
😂😂
Amen to that
No we must honor the lord
Not when your starving.
Fuck the lord, he ain't pay for my Jumbo Jack combo meal.
"I just got bit on purpose so I could live forever and see future cars." I fucking lost it.
hissing the equivalent of family praying at dinner time.
"I mean are you two even lesbians?" 🤣🤣#Dead
"Seriously girl you gota get your hands off me before i f#cks you up" literally had be on the floor lol
xD that was so f*ckin hillarious!
This killed me.
that part always gets me
dx Wolf "Been touching my nipples for 15 minutes, just nasty!"
dx Wolf Been touching my nipple for 15 god damn minutes xD
"I got bit on purpose so I could live forever and see Future Cars."
*THE TRUTH ABOUT LIFE AND DEATH... YOU CAN KNOW IT*
Read the first 3 pages of 'The Present' @ TruthContest(^)Com
_This will change your life..._
Xavier Moutoux Seems legit.
This sketch always makes me wanna launch VTMB.
This o negative tastes like pennies
I thought she said "panties" (you know like, menstruation and shit)
Peter Steele would laugh at that
*Feet smack the ground
*I SMEEEEEL OH NEGATVE!!!*
*Distant screaming
Blood has iron in it.
No sugar protein on the surface of O- so it should be bland like pennies
That's what I imagined modern vampires would be like. Living with modern comfort, none of that hissing, goth and stuff
I admit i would do both. Have a big screen tv and play depeche mode while wearing victorian men's suits and drinking people at metalconcerts
It depends on how "modern" the vampires actually are. You can expect ancient vampires to have equally ancient tastes.
this is one of my favourite Key n peele hahahahhaa
lol the gangsta dude sounding like fresh prince of bel air and that girl playing as a victim, WOW! Amazing reaction and performance...someone, please put this one on a next vampire movie or any movie with horror. Shhiii...intense yet arousing with Key and Peele on the show
"And this song has been playing for like two years and it sucks"
Oh hey, Key and Peele predicted despacito
Aurel Matthews lmao
Noooooooooo lmaooo😭😭😭😂😂😂😂
Ay fuck u despacito is treason bitch
What is the song
Bruhh nice one
"Spread the meat" Lmaoooo! I'm so done.
😂😂😂😂
Pun intended
I so love that part"Olivia spread the meat"😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
666 likes
Like... my 20th time watchimg this... a masterpiece!!! I miss key and peele.
This was the very first skit I ever saw...I have now practically watched every one😂
Seriously one girl for a feast? they are like 9 people in the room, that's like like trying to make a buffett out of one plate.
Haha, yeah I think they tried to incorporate that fact as part of the parody
*****
It's because they don't believe in it. Que Reservoir Dogs "I don't believe in tips" scene.
@C caymer
Vampires aren't eating the meat though, they're drinking the blood.
Well, guess they are broke vampires.
The human body has about 9-12 pints blood. That’s about 4,500-5700 mL. Usually the average woman have about 9 pints.
But yea...that would be exactly that-given most vampires drink their victims blood until they die from hypovolemia. No wonder they’re hungry
"Yall all licking touching and hissing damn if we gone eat than lets eats" 😂😂😂😂
I need more of this
0:41 imagine if one of them didn’t brush their teeth.
"The first night of your new....what are wearing here??" Lmao🤣🤣🤣
We
"Are you two even leuhsbians?"
Lesbians *
@@Str6y he wrote it that way because the way he said it if you keep on acting like that you finna get r/wooosh
@@user-ru5fw4ht1r thanks for the clarafacation dawg
@@Str6y you're welcome
Stray r/wooosh
Definitely one of my favorite sketches :D
1:22 when he says " still see the skin ,aahhhaahh..( with head movement is so funny to me)
"Did any of that actually get in your mouth. No wonder ya all hungry all da time." 😀😂
"I got bit so I can live forever and see future cars."
Bro is super nonchalant😆...he just came to feast. .just wearing what I got bit in🤣🤣🤣
Here for the ever lovely 'Lily' (AT&T). The comedy did not disappoint.
"I wanna live forever and see future cars." lmao
I know, rite?!..dumb ass reason to want to become a vampire,
very funny shit
Kevin Willis
You kidding me? Who the fuck wouldn't wanna be a vampire AND see kickass future cars?
Kevin Willis Not really seeing why it's a dumb reason. I mean, other than sparing yourself from a slow, painful demise from a untreatable disease, what falls into the category of a SMART reason to become one?
cisco path, banging hot vampire chicks and also non-vampire chicks for all eternity. There. Smartest reason ever.
Tived Nagol That's assuming any of them want anything to do with you, which they probably wouldn't, considering you put that as a reason.