One of the biggest issues is probably that you need a bit of luck to meet someone that you're very compatible with, and you need to both be willing to show it, making friends doesn't need to be hard but I get that for people who have been out of social environment for a while it seems impossible
I wouldn’t recommend being friends with someone who is jealous of you. If you can make it work, you can make it work. My experience is different, when my best friend told me she was jealous of me it ruined our entire friendship. She didn’t get nicer after that she started to treat me worse and worse until i couldn’t take it anymore.
15:45 having friends is part sharing your feelings and hardships, part showing up for each others accomplishments and hardships, part having fun, part growing up, and part holding each other accountable. It’s a relationship just like family, except it’s chosen. They’re important for us to live long and healthy lives because without them, who do we have? Not many others. Don’t let anyone make you a place holder. If you’re going to give kindness to others know when to walk away when it’s not being reciprocated.
Rightt the online people i text to are like this sometimes. They dont text back or dont text me when im not reaching for them first and a possible friendship gets lost. And this sucks
I had best friend in my school day that was “ bad friend”. For 5 years I was used to hearing her saying bad things about me and most things that I did. Firstly I thought that it’s just her way of joking. But later on she was even meaner about what I wear how I look… now when I think about her she complimented me only once. At the end of our friendship I for once said ‘no’ to what she was saying about me and she stopped talking to me. Now I thank God that this friendship ended. Still the trauma was so terrible that for many years I stopped believing in friendship. Right now I have one friend and some people that I talk from time to time and it’s really hard for me to fully open to another person.
I’m always someone’s “best friend” when it comes to them venting to me. Otherwise, it’s very seldom ppl call me just to check in or to have conversations on future plans. I don’t mind the venting but if it’s ALL you do, uhn uhn. I want my friends to choose me when it’s time to have a good time (while leaving the BS at home).
i don’t totally understand the idea that a girl is living a double life because she’s more likely to talk about her feelings with someone she knows (you) vs not telling strangers she’s having a hard time?
A best friend never lasts forever Yes, they exist but every phase of your life needs a different best friend, someone with new views and opinions. That’s why you need to choose each of them wisely This doesn’t mean you don’t love them, it means they cannot be forever :(
I have ONE best friend. Her and I are very busy but when we do see each other, its always so much fun and she's always there for me when I need her. I hear my coworkers talk about their friends and it seems like they have a competition, rather than a friendship. Its a shame. Im glad I stay away from that toxic drama.
I just love you and your channel so much. I’m a year below you, first gen Nigerian, look similar to you and I also have similar personality to you like it’s so crazy because I’ve been looking for a RUclipsr I can depend on and relate to and you have been that so keep being great!
I have been dealing with a lot of the things you talked about currently with two different friends. One of them only wants to hangout if theres something to vent about yet they go ghost whenever plans or actual activities are asked about. One of my other friends has shown me just how condescending and egotistical they really are. This person belittles me if I don't agree with an opinion they have and will make frequent statements like, "I'm smarter than everyone," yet when they are called on their shit, they try to gaslight their way out of it. I thought it was uncommon to deal with people like this, but now that I've seen your video, it feels good to know im not alone.
I’m the same. I don’t like to confront ppl, ESPECIALLY if the things I want to confront them about keeps piling up. Like we’re adults, so you doing something to me that you wouldn’t like done to you, seems purposeful. I also don’t want to keep nagging at a person, making them feel bad for being who they are. Once again, we’re fully developed adults so you’re less likely to change your ways. I don’t want to parent my partner, nor my friends. Come into the relationship with the standard of mutual respect and care.
I know this maybe weird and random but I think you are very beautiful and the intelligence is like a bonus to that. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you are less because you aren’t with the weird stuff this gen is on. Sincerely A fellow introvert!
As a now 29 year old man who's friendless for the longest time, I noticed throughout the video how friendship is more problematic in the female side than there is male. Yeah, safe to say, girls and women are highly antagonistic to each other. Always have been since the beginning of time. I've been noticing, not too long, how girl's girl has been nothing more than a facade. They may act cool with one another, when in reality, they're really not. Behind every interaction is jealousy, envy, insecurity, hatred and hostility. They never really like each other from the start. They all hate each other. They can be so catty, gossipy and passive-aggressive to one another each and every time. It's downright frightening. I see this happening a lot throughout my entire life. Not to mention how there is always this one girl hanging with a group of guys. Yep, for females, there's always competition. For me, I had more acquaintances than friends. I mean, I hungout with a few in the past, but that was it. I guess it's good that I opted to no longer bother making friendships because why should I? It's honestly better to have few to no company than to have a gazillion fake people. Guess I am just too good for them.
Nah, that's true among toxic females. Their stories are loud but in the minority. I'm 28 and would not be half of the woman i am without my female friends
No. That is TOO INACCURATE. I have female friends and we are nothing like that to each other, I would never treat someone I consider a friend in such a manner Saying that ALL female friendships are fake and that we all secretly hate each other is just very inaccurate 💀💀
A lot of times too, someone is trying to treat you well, and you just have different expectations. I've cared a lot about people who were then like wow, you're so mean. And it was confusing to me, because if *I* thought it was mean, I wouldn't have done it. I couldn't even guess. If someone is hurting your feelings they might not even realize, you've got to tell them.
Only have participated in a single friend group in my life and they shunned me after multiple faux pas and descending mental health. Just seeing the inner circle was beautiful even if I wasn’t friends with them. They found it easy to block and forget me in spite of my activity trying to connect.
No cus I have this friend rn, she makes fun of everyone for like literally everything but at the same time she seems sweet with me sometimes??? So one day, i told her an insecurity of mine and at the start, she tried to convince me that it was beautiful and stuff. THEN, one day we were with our other friend and we were roasting eachother as a JOKE... I only said somethinf about the gap in betweem her teeth (which she didnt rlly have so i js made up) AND THEN SHE GOES AND ATTACKS MY INSECURITY?? Excuse me, then, she also attacked friend 2 saying something abt her parents not loving her and that rlly fcking hurts cus friend 2 doesnt have the best relationship w her mom. BUT LIKE IM ALSO ENVIOUS OF HER LOOKS AND GRADES??? IM SO CONFLICTED WITH MYSELF. Like i cant really control how i feel about her yk? and rn my comparison w her is better, but how i coped w the comparison isn't so great, because i js think about her mean personality.
Oh yeah I totally get the conflicted feelings you have, on one side you are envious and on the other you noticed how “toxic” she behaves. Maybe you just realised how not so “perfect” she was and that it wasn’t worth feeling so envious because she didn’t “inspire” you as much because of the way she used your insecurity against you? But I know it’s pretty basic but usually people that make fun of others or gossip about others, they also probably gossip and all behind your back too, or they definitely will. (Talking from experience cuz my friends did that not long ago and I thought several months before “naaaah they wouldn’t do that.. ? OH YES THEY WILL.” ) Anyway hope this helped !
Friends that are jealous of the other are bad friends, cuz they are actual narcissists always having the "i am better than you" Or "you are better than me" Feeling like not wanting the "friend" To have something you have which is a very bad friendship overall
Just some advice. You should have an outro so people have time to click on your other videos! So often I go to click another video of yours and the video ends and RUclips starts queuing someone else’s :)
l think these toxic/jelous people are super hard to detect. When someone tells you it is quite obvious but l had friendships where although there was bullying my friend seemed to have a sassy personality. l know l should have probably pointed out if l didn't like her attitude and comments on me but l didn't wanted to seem like a sensitive person and just played along tho it drained my energy like a lot. l don't talk to her anymore tho l see her time to time in school and l still don't know if she was a bad person or not
Is it really hard for women to be friends or like each other. Dudes become friends for life over just one beer. Why do women hate each other so much? I see this shit at work too like it’s not that serious 😭😭😭
i don’t totally understand the idea that a girl is living a double life because she’s more likely to talk about her feelings with someone she knows (you) vs not telling strangers she’s having a hard time?
They are always people hating you for no reason
Bruh
Some of them are so bad that you can even agree with them on something yet they’ll still act bitter in some way.
@@ChristinaAaliyahI really really like you you’re my best friend ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@@ChristinaAaliyahyou’re very pretty
@@ChristinaAaliyahI’m 32 I’m too old for your content but I still love your videos anyway
One of the biggest issues is probably that you need a bit of luck to meet someone that you're very compatible with, and you need to both be willing to show it, making friends doesn't need to be hard but I get that for people who have been out of social environment for a while it seems impossible
I wouldn’t recommend being friends with someone who is jealous of you. If you can make it work, you can make it work. My experience is different, when my best friend told me she was jealous of me it ruined our entire friendship. She didn’t get nicer after that she started to treat me worse and worse until i couldn’t take it anymore.
This is why im 28 and past 10 years I've had zero friends. ... happy in my own company i care about money & other things as i get older
Liking your own company is such an important skill ❤
15:45 having friends is part sharing your feelings and hardships, part showing up for each others accomplishments and hardships, part having fun, part growing up, and part holding each other accountable. It’s a relationship just like family, except it’s chosen. They’re important for us to live long and healthy lives because without them, who do we have? Not many others. Don’t let anyone make you a place holder. If you’re going to give kindness to others know when to walk away when it’s not being reciprocated.
slaying so hard congrats on 100 k : )
THANK YOU
Sometimes after a very intense communication you stop writing or initiating things with them and… they just disappear 😶🌫️
Rightt the online people i text to are like this sometimes. They dont text back or dont text me when im not reaching for them first and a possible friendship gets lost. And this sucks
I had best friend in my school day that was “ bad friend”. For 5 years I was used to hearing her saying bad things about me and most things that I did. Firstly I thought that it’s just her way of joking. But later on she was even meaner about what I wear how I look… now when I think about her she complimented me only once. At the end of our friendship I for once said ‘no’ to what she was saying about me and she stopped talking to me. Now I thank God that this friendship ended. Still the trauma was so terrible that for many years I stopped believing in friendship. Right now I have one friend and some people that I talk from time to time and it’s really hard for me to fully open to another person.
I’m always someone’s “best friend” when it comes to them venting to me. Otherwise, it’s very seldom ppl call me just to check in or to have conversations on future plans. I don’t mind the venting but if it’s ALL you do, uhn uhn. I want my friends to choose me when it’s time to have a good time (while leaving the BS at home).
Im so happy for your achievement!!
Thank you I’m getting emosh 🥹
i don’t totally understand the idea that a girl is living a double life because she’s more likely to talk about her feelings with someone she knows (you) vs not telling strangers she’s having a hard time?
A best friend never lasts forever
Yes, they exist but every phase of your life needs a different best friend, someone with new views and opinions. That’s why you need to choose each of them wisely
This doesn’t mean you don’t love them, it means they cannot be forever :(
Heartbreaking realisation. I hope my next best friend will be for a long time but after just losing my first proper one, I realise this well.
I have ONE best friend. Her and I are very busy but when we do see each other, its always so much fun and she's always there for me when I need her. I hear my coworkers talk about their friends and it seems like they have a competition, rather than a friendship. Its a shame. Im glad I stay away from that toxic drama.
That why I go by, “make money, not friends”! 💵🤑💵
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 100,000 SUBS ❤️❤️❤️❤️😭😭 What the heck!!
Congratulations on that many subs! You deserve it. Thank you for making such relatable content.
You deserve it 😊. Personally I have ADHD and u have helped me a lot
🎉🎉🎉🎉
This is another really good video, thank you so much
You’re so welcome
@@ChristinaAaliyah 😭you always make my day posting a video
I just love you and your channel so much. I’m a year below you, first gen Nigerian, look similar to you and I also have similar personality to you like it’s so crazy because I’ve been looking for a RUclipsr I can depend on and relate to and you have been that so keep being great!
congrats on 100K Christina!! well-deserved!! can't wait to see more of your future content!
I have been dealing with a lot of the things you talked about currently with two different friends. One of them only wants to hangout if theres something to vent about yet they go ghost whenever plans or actual activities are asked about.
One of my other friends has shown me just how condescending and egotistical they really are. This person belittles me if I don't agree with an opinion they have and will make frequent statements like, "I'm smarter than everyone," yet when they are called on their shit, they try to gaslight their way out of it.
I thought it was uncommon to deal with people like this, but now that I've seen your video, it feels good to know im not alone.
The timing of this video-
Ik out of context BUT YOU'RE SO GORGEOUS omgg 🫶🏻🫶🏻
I’m the same. I don’t like to confront ppl, ESPECIALLY if the things I want to confront them about keeps piling up. Like we’re adults, so you doing something to me that you wouldn’t like done to you, seems purposeful. I also don’t want to keep nagging at a person, making them feel bad for being who they are. Once again, we’re fully developed adults so you’re less likely to change your ways. I don’t want to parent my partner, nor my friends. Come into the relationship with the standard of mutual respect and care.
I know this maybe weird and random but I think you are very beautiful and the intelligence is like a bonus to that. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you are less because you aren’t with the weird stuff this gen is on.
Sincerely
A fellow introvert!
Girl you talk about everything I had a breakdown about in the last month lol love you
let it out girl, i hope you feel better
@ChristinaAaliyah Haha thank you, makes me feel weird less tbh ☺️❤️
Guys lets get her to 200k subscribers
As a now 29 year old man who's friendless for the longest time, I noticed throughout the video how friendship is more problematic in the female side than there is male. Yeah, safe to say, girls and women are highly antagonistic to each other. Always have been since the beginning of time. I've been noticing, not too long, how girl's girl has been nothing more than a facade. They may act cool with one another, when in reality, they're really not. Behind every interaction is jealousy, envy, insecurity, hatred and hostility. They never really like each other from the start. They all hate each other. They can be so catty, gossipy and passive-aggressive to one another each and every time. It's downright frightening. I see this happening a lot throughout my entire life. Not to mention how there is always this one girl hanging with a group of guys. Yep, for females, there's always competition.
For me, I had more acquaintances than friends. I mean, I hungout with a few in the past, but that was it. I guess it's good that I opted to no longer bother making friendships because why should I? It's honestly better to have few to no company than to have a gazillion fake people. Guess I am just too good for them.
Nah, that's true among toxic females. Their stories are loud but in the minority. I'm 28 and would not be half of the woman i am without my female friends
No. That is TOO INACCURATE. I have female friends and we are nothing like that to each other, I would never treat someone I consider a friend in such a manner Saying that ALL female friendships are fake and that we all secretly hate each other is just very inaccurate 💀💀
The generalization is too loud and too wrong...ALL catty, ALL secretly hate each other💀💀what?💀😭
A lot of times too, someone is trying to treat you well, and you just have different expectations. I've cared a lot about people who were then like wow, you're so mean. And it was confusing to me, because if *I* thought it was mean, I wouldn't have done it. I couldn't even guess. If someone is hurting your feelings they might not even realize, you've got to tell them.
Congrats on 100k Christina
I love you sooo much, and I see you going places ❤️❤️. Just thought to drop this over here.
Only have participated in a single friend group in my life and they shunned me after multiple faux pas and descending mental health.
Just seeing the inner circle was beautiful even if I wasn’t friends with them. They found it easy to block and forget me in spite of my activity trying to connect.
Girls be hating me for NO reason lol😅
2:14 yes me I let it slide. What can I possibly do?
8:00 I’ve never been jealous :)
please make a video on how to get over situationships pls pls really need that
Focus on yourself.
Hmmm this is a good idea
Hmmm this is a good idea
No cus I have this friend rn, she makes fun of everyone for like literally everything but at the same time she seems sweet with me sometimes??? So one day, i told her an insecurity of mine and at the start, she tried to convince me that it was beautiful and stuff. THEN, one day we were with our other friend and we were roasting eachother as a JOKE... I only said somethinf about the gap in betweem her teeth (which she didnt rlly have so i js made up) AND THEN SHE GOES AND ATTACKS MY INSECURITY?? Excuse me, then, she also attacked friend 2 saying something abt her parents not loving her and that rlly fcking hurts cus friend 2 doesnt have the best relationship w her mom.
BUT LIKE IM ALSO ENVIOUS OF HER LOOKS AND GRADES??? IM SO CONFLICTED WITH MYSELF. Like i cant really control how i feel about her yk? and rn my comparison w her is better, but how i coped w the comparison isn't so great, because i js think about her mean personality.
Oh yeah I totally get the conflicted feelings you have, on one side you are envious and on the other you noticed how “toxic” she behaves. Maybe you just realised how not so “perfect” she was and that it wasn’t worth feeling so envious because she didn’t “inspire” you as much because of the way she used your insecurity against you?
But I know it’s pretty basic but usually people that make fun of others or gossip about others, they also probably gossip and all behind your back too, or they definitely will. (Talking from experience cuz my friends did that not long ago and I thought several months before “naaaah they wouldn’t do that.. ? OH YES THEY WILL.” )
Anyway hope this helped !
@@KooklilacLIN YES TYSM! You're helping me understand how i feel better :)
@Harryismysavior glad I could help
I have a video idea that might be of interest; Whats your opinion on dating in the past in comparison to dating now?
Friends that are jealous of the other are bad friends, cuz they are actual narcissists always having the "i am better than you" Or "you are better than me" Feeling like not wanting the "friend" To have something you have which is a very bad friendship overall
Just some advice. You should have an outro so people have time to click on your other videos! So often I go to click another video of yours and the video ends and RUclips starts queuing someone else’s :)
l think these toxic/jelous people are super hard to detect. When someone tells you it is quite obvious but l had friendships where although there was bullying my friend seemed to have a sassy personality. l know l should have probably pointed out if l didn't like her attitude and comments on me but l didn't wanted to seem like a sensitive person and just played along tho it drained my energy like a lot. l don't talk to her anymore tho l see her time to time in school and l still don't know if she was a bad person or not
heyyy first one
What do you use for your thumbnails? CapCut?? They’re awesome
Thank you! Photoshop :)
@ thanks! 🙏
can you tone down the retention editing please? i liked some of your older videos but the sweeps and hooks are doing too much
Is it really hard for women to be friends or like each other. Dudes become friends for life over just one beer. Why do women hate each other so much? I see this shit at work too like it’s not that serious 😭😭😭
Lol girls always get jelly
i would give YOU the male attention (pls don't cancel me)
Fml
i don’t totally understand the idea that a girl is living a double life because she’s more likely to talk about her feelings with someone she knows (you) vs not telling strangers she’s having a hard time?
thats what i was thinking