Today Now! Interviews The 5-Year-Old Screenwriter Of "Fast Five"

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  • Опубликовано: 3 окт 2024

Комментарии • 6 тыс.

  • @nateyj11
    @nateyj11 9 лет назад +24694

    You've got to hand it to the kid, he knows how to translate his vision onto the big screen.

    • @JJtoob
      @JJtoob 9 лет назад +125

      ***** That's more than I can say for the awesome musical ideas I sometimes get, but don't know how to put down on paper or reproduce them in real life lol.

    • @Competitive_Antagonist
      @Competitive_Antagonist 5 лет назад +83

      He's only 5, but what's the excuse of the adults that go to see these movies?

    • @conansmith5164
      @conansmith5164 5 лет назад +16

      He's awesome

    • @TerraExodus
      @TerraExodus 4 года назад +3

      Better than some these days....

    • @RobGradyVO
      @RobGradyVO 4 года назад +5

      A true Auteur through and through.

  • @Howleye
    @Howleye 5 лет назад +13656

    Sadly Chris was fired by the studio before fast and furious 7 because he was getting too old

    • @jacobgoldenofficial4321
      @jacobgoldenofficial4321 4 года назад +76

      😂😂

    • @HowlingWolf518
      @HowlingWolf518 4 года назад +714

      There's a bright side though - he got a new job ghostwriting for Game of Thrones in 2016.

    • @jacobgoldenofficial4321
      @jacobgoldenofficial4321 4 года назад +34

      @@HowlingWolf518
      😂😂lol

    • @maradorgold5596
      @maradorgold5596 4 года назад +167

      And I always thought they fired him because they found some inappropriate Twitter Posts 3 years ago. LoL.

    • @nii_amart
      @nii_amart 4 года назад +5

      😂 😂 😂

  • @EMc71
    @EMc71 2 года назад +26964

    I’ve always told people when it comes to the Fast and Furious franchise the books are way better than the movies. I’m almost done with the fifth book; I’ve only got like three more pages to color.

    • @gabbyty7144
      @gabbyty7144 2 года назад +631

      lol this is an underrated comment

    • @RizandroNapone
      @RizandroNapone 2 года назад +165

      was just about to say what an underrated comment this is

    • @Suchen_Wahrheit
      @Suchen_Wahrheit 2 года назад +256

      Eric keep it between the lines

    • @MD-ve9eh
      @MD-ve9eh 2 года назад +35

      Nice 😭😭

    • @som3380
      @som3380 2 года назад +18

      Wow

  • @joshdoppelt
    @joshdoppelt Год назад +3408

    heartwarming to see how much family means to this 5 year old

    • @RyuLongRHOG
      @RyuLongRHOG Год назад +22

      underrated 😂😂

    • @pcwildcat
      @pcwildcat Год назад +10

      the perfect comment does exist... thank you for your service.

    • @Dbfjjxnd
      @Dbfjjxnd 11 месяцев назад +12

      FaMry

  • @mousermind
    @mousermind 4 года назад +12930

    I can't believe how legitimate this feels.

    • @StewHeisenberg
      @StewHeisenberg 4 года назад +164

      Corby Dorian Why exactly? It isn’t far from the truth that a kid probably directs these Fast movies lmfao

    • @MrSlanderer
      @MrSlanderer 4 года назад +16

      Corby Dorian Found the muscle car douche...

    • @raven75257
      @raven75257 4 года назад +98

      Excuse me? "kid"?! How dare you! He is very well known screenwriter and you call him just a "kid"?! smh people these days😤

    • @karltonhoward8157
      @karltonhoward8157 4 года назад +9

      I had to check the comments to make sure it was a joke haha

    • @AC-wl7ve
      @AC-wl7ve 4 года назад +18

      Corby Dorian it’s not much less legitimate than cnn. They parade a teenage girl as climate expert, a covid exper, and a racism expert.

  • @spaghettioverlord3247
    @spaghettioverlord3247 4 года назад +10284

    “Sheseesethebulletbutthebulletwentpoofpastherfaceandshedidn’tdiesheonlyhadtotakeabath” he really knows how to make a masterpiece

    • @kilgoretrout4350
      @kilgoretrout4350 4 года назад +118

      All you gave to do is put Angelina Jolie in a bath to sell tickets

    • @wandcamilo3989
      @wandcamilo3989 4 года назад +6

      No.

    • @spaghettioverlord3247
      @spaghettioverlord3247 4 года назад +21

      Salty 5000 it’s funny because there are no spaces in between the words

    • @RobGradyVO
      @RobGradyVO 4 года назад +2

      @Derka Derka all the best masterpieces are imo

    • @spencergravy7452
      @spencergravy7452 3 года назад +10

      feminist manifesto

  • @MrHeavy466
    @MrHeavy466 4 года назад +5704

    0:45 There’s a cameo by the assistant director.

  • @BirdGang6
    @BirdGang6 2 года назад +1628

    Jim’s “no spoilers” line makes me laugh every single time lol

    • @alexf9381
      @alexf9381 Год назад +8

      Same lmao..

    • @dejiabdulkareem
      @dejiabdulkareem Год назад +18

      That line was almost cruel

    • @kellysereda4961
      @kellysereda4961 Год назад +14

      Ironically, the films are filled with spoilers.

    • @plopdoo339
      @plopdoo339 Год назад

      Booom pshhh

    • @plopdoo339
      @plopdoo339 Год назад +5

      ​@@kellysereda4961 the first movie spoiled the entire franchise for me

  • @Commanderziff
    @Commanderziff 3 года назад +9514

    It's impressive how his writing has stayed so consistent through all the franchises installments. There's never a change in quality.

    • @lachlanbell8390
      @lachlanbell8390 3 года назад +221

      Even as he's gotten three times older than he was back then, he's managed to forestall any progression. Really quite remarkable.

    • @grandrapids57
      @grandrapids57 3 года назад +32

      An outstanding left handed compliment.

    • @Dominian1
      @Dominian1 3 года назад +190

      They replace the kids when they become too coherent. Wouldn't want to alienate the fanbase.

    • @edinfific2576
      @edinfific2576 2 года назад +24

      @@Dominian1 Underrated comment! 😂

    • @danitho
      @danitho Год назад +4

      @@Dominian1 🤣🤣🤣

  • @RaghunandanReddyC
    @RaghunandanReddyC 4 года назад +21458

    This aged like wine.

    • @ZLFT
      @ZLFT 4 года назад +147

      Raghunandan Reddy C soon it will be almost indistinguishable

    • @LOKITYZ
      @LOKITYZ 4 года назад +334

      And John Cena is Dom's brother, and Han is not reallt dead! And cars can swing from ropes like Tarzan! It' be awesome!

    • @ZLFT
      @ZLFT 4 года назад +183

      James D ??
      ‘Aged like wine’?
      I’m sorry do we need to be 50 years old to know wine ages and use it in an expression? Lol

    • @aniki6575
      @aniki6575 4 года назад +51

      @@ZLFT wut

    • @zarrg5611
      @zarrg5611 4 года назад +81

      @@ZLFT I don't drink an I perfectly understand that reference, Wine is put in barrel, wine is left for many years, wine becomes better as time passes.

  • @okrajoe
    @okrajoe 6 лет назад +27332

    How does the Onion get access to interview Hollywood talent of this caliber?

    • @pisse3000
      @pisse3000 6 лет назад +524

      I'd put the question in reverse. Hollywood should get in touch with the Onion.

    • @JoeLibby
      @JoeLibby 6 лет назад +439

      They contacted his parents . . . er, I mean, his representatives.

    • @Greendalewitch
      @Greendalewitch 6 лет назад +131

      Joe Libby No they kidnappe- eh I mean borrowed him, with a offer of all the candy you can eat in a black car.

    • @RainMan221
      @RainMan221 5 лет назад +13

      😂😂😂😂😂

    • @RainMan221
      @RainMan221 5 лет назад +5

      @@pisse3000 exactly!😂

  • @TheProdigalMeowMeowMeowReturns
    @TheProdigalMeowMeowMeowReturns Год назад +454

    This kid doesn’t have friends. He got family

  • @jm6691
    @jm6691 3 года назад +6224

    I love knowing this kid is now old enough to appreciate how funny this skit is thanks to his performance. Incredible

    • @ShawnJonesHellion
      @ShawnJonesHellion 2 года назад +19

      you do realize the show f&f is made for USA "adults" right? so i assume if you aren't gifted an talented at birth you are just american.

    • @jm6691
      @jm6691 2 года назад +586

      @@ShawnJonesHellion What?

    • @discordlexia2429
      @discordlexia2429 2 года назад +363

      @@ShawnJonesHellion Mate, please, don't try to speak in a language you don't understand. It's just going to be illegible.

    • @R-H-B
      @R-H-B Год назад +3

      @@ShawnJonesHellion this came out ELEVEN YEARS AGO you cantaloupe

    • @Resi1ience
      @Resi1ience Год назад +173

      This was made 11 years ago, and if he was 5, that would make him 17.
      I'm sure it's a very proud memory.

  • @callawolf531
    @callawolf531 3 года назад +3230

    "She didn't die, she just needed to take a bath!"
    I felt that. Never in my life did I think I'd find a truer statement of summer movies

  • @boardgamebrawl
    @boardgamebrawl 8 лет назад +12972

    The most chilingly accurate part of the video is that there will be 600 sequels.

    • @Toochilledtocare-_-
      @Toochilledtocare-_- 8 лет назад +19

      how are you lucky?

    • @OmegaBlackHeart
      @OmegaBlackHeart 6 лет назад +90

      And people will continue to pay to see it. We'll see cars in space soon.

    • @CWINDOWSsystem32
      @CWINDOWSsystem32 6 лет назад +56

      Board Game Brawl Only 600? There will be shitty Fast and The Furious movies every year until the human race goes extinct...

    • @MaartenvanRossemLezingen
      @MaartenvanRossemLezingen 6 лет назад +24

      And they'll be screen-written by a 5 year old.

    • @Gabriel-rh1bi
      @Gabriel-rh1bi 6 лет назад +18

      OmegaBlackHeart
      There are cars in space

  • @Ozcogger
    @Ozcogger Год назад +4992

    They literally nailed it. These people went from street racing thief's to international spec ops. Only a Child could have been writing this with their Hot wheels.

    • @EmperorsNewWardrobe
      @EmperorsNewWardrobe Год назад +93

      To do so literally would involve nails. I see no nails

    • @kurtsudheim825
      @kurtsudheim825 Год назад +15

      I think there was even a reference to that in one of the films

    • @kurtsudheim825
      @kurtsudheim825 Год назад +6

      ​@@EmperorsNewWardrobe the expression of nailed it, not actuality nailing it, so whilst I agree with your sentiment most times l, he is correct here, just needed the inverted commas, or even all caps

    • @drafezard7315
      @drafezard7315 Год назад +46

      @@kurtsudheim825 The expression is a metaphor, saying they "literally" nailed it is clarifying that they're not speaking metaphorically. So no, they are not correct in any sense, also using all caps does not equate to the correct use of grammar, ever!

    • @OGillan
      @OGillan Год назад +18

      More than spec ops, they're basically superheroes now

  • @jaschr2233
    @jaschr2233 10 лет назад +18885

    The joke is that you think it is a joke.

  • @aaronsound
    @aaronsound 4 года назад +10295

    "The car goes ZOOM and the goes Phruara!"
    "OH NO SPOILERS NO SPOILERS"
    man why is this SO GOOOOOD

    • @mandreadfg
      @mandreadfg 4 года назад +79

      I'm crying at this

    • @dAvrilthebear
      @dAvrilthebear 3 года назад +191

      He completely spoiled the plot for me! I watched the film anyway - not for the story, but for the acting.

    • @aaronsound
      @aaronsound 3 года назад +42

      @CJ2 ? no one said anything about white people

    • @Liverpool5095
      @Liverpool5095 3 года назад +24

      @CJ2 You're not that smart, are you?

    • @smoothred9453
      @smoothred9453 3 года назад +24

      @CJ2 ur lost troll

  • @16ltb
    @16ltb 5 лет назад +7318

    is this the same kid who writes
    the tranformers movies?

    • @wyprman
      @wyprman 5 лет назад +480

      Dysfunctional Patterns No, this is his big brother.

    • @aproapri13
      @aproapri13 4 года назад +5

      Mister Morgen you mean you?

    • @bobmar9239
      @bobmar9239 4 года назад +138

      No, no the Transformer movies are far more nuanced. They were written by a 7 year old.

    • @RoskinGreenrake
      @RoskinGreenrake 4 года назад +2

      No, she's ethnic..

    • @roryross3878
      @roryross3878 4 года назад +15

      @Toori Baba Tom Cruise

  • @PhilMoskowitz
    @PhilMoskowitz Год назад +2993

    He was a better writer at four and five years old. Once he reached first grade the fame, money, girls and drugs went to his head.

    • @yogeshwarnirmaan1368
      @yogeshwarnirmaan1368 Год назад +26

      🤣🤣👌

    • @AyeGameBae
      @AyeGameBae Год назад +48

      Too much cerelac. Smh

    • @angrysquirrel187
      @angrysquirrel187 Год назад +28

      Is this the same kid that wound up being a drinking prodigy for Ohio State?😜

    • @Where_is_Waldo
      @Where_is_Waldo Год назад +12

      Well, they're not trying to appeal to such a mature audience.

    • @kurtsudheim825
      @kurtsudheim825 Год назад +4

      Ya, it's l, he's lost his edge (wait, he must be the next ex wrestler turned actor to feature

  • @Theystolemyhandle
    @Theystolemyhandle 5 лет назад +3287

    “Then is goes PFFTSWAHHH!”
    “No spoilers, no spoilers!”
    XD

  • @alexmathis4736
    @alexmathis4736 4 года назад +1826

    He's over-qualified for that franchise.

    • @matthewgasparin7000
      @matthewgasparin7000 3 года назад +43

      Yeah Fast and Furious 1-4 was written by 3 year olds. He should move to the Transformers where his abilities will be greatly appreciated.

    • @ervandrafadhlil403
      @ervandrafadhlil403 3 года назад +14

      @@matthewgasparin7000 nah thats too small for someone his caliber he should be directing the next avenger movie

    • @haydenhouser
      @haydenhouser 3 года назад +2

      💀

    • @3baxcb
      @3baxcb 3 года назад +2

      Young screenwriters sometimes have to start with franchises. It wasn't like he was being asked to do a video game adaptation.

  • @LAdamJ1
    @LAdamJ1 10 лет назад +4105

    Only 593 more to go.....

  • @Alley00Cat
    @Alley00Cat 4 месяца назад +171

    Why is the RUclips algo suggesting this to me today? Where have you been for the past 13 years? This is gold.

    • @heavenly2k
      @heavenly2k 4 месяца назад +2

      Same

    • @shinyagami8843
      @shinyagami8843 4 месяца назад +1

      Ikr?! 😅

    • @imnotgivingmynametoamachine683
      @imnotgivingmynametoamachine683 3 месяца назад +3

      You are in for a treat then because there is a ton of great onion videos to binge! It's sad they stopped making them but they were fantastic

    • @Alley00Cat
      @Alley00Cat 3 месяца назад

      @@imnotgivingmynametoamachine683 I’ve been watching a few, it’s really funny. I remember looking at their website a decade ago, hilarious. Never realized they made videos. Where have I been!!!?

    • @daviddee9336
      @daviddee9336 День назад

      Only got suggested this today and it feels like I was missing a limb and only just realised

  • @mymicks21
    @mymicks21 4 года назад +9479

    Probably the greatest child actor I've ever seen not gonna lie.

    • @mymicks21
      @mymicks21 4 года назад +260

      @@smittywerbenjaegermanjense6486 I've seen that one too and really liked it. I like this one because the kid so young and reads the script like a rambling child perfectly

    • @dougchampion8084
      @dougchampion8084 4 года назад +420

      Guys, this isn't acting. You don't see a wide shot of their interaction because in reality they're just showing him clips of these movies and then they ask him what he thought or what just happened. They then form the adult dialog around his responses and film those scenes and then the kid in as if he's replying right then and there. Movie magic.

    • @roryross3878
      @roryross3878 4 года назад +47

      @@dougchampion8084
      So super method huh?

    • @dougchampion8084
      @dougchampion8084 4 года назад +222

      @Yer Nan They're in the room with the kid, it's just not going down how you think it is. They're feeding him clips and getting him to react and describe what he's seeing. Later they record the tighter two-shot you see of the hosts by themselves where the writers have written "questions" to ask him based off the "answers" he's already given to the reaction. They're talking to him in the scenes you see his hands, but they're not saying what you're hearing. The questions are just overdubbed on those parts to make it look like a real back and forth. It's surprisingly easy to get this to work. In fact this is ALL over modern TV and now movies, you'll see an over the shoulder shot where you don't see the actors lips, they frame the shot like this so they can change the line later if they want to, which they always do. This lets them re-record the dialog. It all cuts together nicely because your mind is wired to believe what it's presented and it fills in the gaps to support this belief. It's a common tactic and it's for sure what's happening here, it's just way more entertaining. This is how you get great "performances" out of little kids, and the reason "kids say the darndest things" was a TV show. All you have to do is get them talking on their own, you'd never get him to deliver lines like this, or be able to write it. That's why the "take a bath line" is so gold, it's something only a kid would say.

    • @roryross3878
      @roryross3878 4 года назад +12

      @@dougchampion8084
      Only a child?!!! I resemble that remark!!!

  • @inspectorjavert8443
    @inspectorjavert8443 7 лет назад +5897

    The kid's a good actor you gotta admit.

    • @MrLethalShots
      @MrLethalShots 6 лет назад +1152

      Inspector Javert I honestly have no idea what you’re talking about. He’s a writer, not an actor.

    • @MrLethalShots
      @MrLethalShots 5 лет назад +88

      @@Jay-is5ef Back at you dumbass.

    • @namanor
      @namanor 5 лет назад +63

      J Dizzle that r/whoooosh is actually for yourself

    • @whyamiwastingmytimeonthis
      @whyamiwastingmytimeonthis 5 лет назад +114

      @@MrLethalShots ⬆⬇r/MurderedByWords
      ⬆⬇ username checks out
      ⬆⬇ r/ihavereddit
      ⬆⬇ put me in the screenshot Edit: wow this blew up! thanks for the gold kind stranger!

    • @MrLethalShots
      @MrLethalShots 5 лет назад +1

      @@whyamiwastingmytimeonthis Are you saying this ended up on those subs?

  • @christopherambrosio8147
    @christopherambrosio8147 4 года назад +4928

    "Is there a chance we'll see a sequel?"
    "YES, 600 😂"
    Checks out

    • @dannyU2g
      @dannyU2g 3 года назад +111

      I know where i'll be every summer lmao

    • @kip258
      @kip258 3 года назад +55

      You laugh now, but they've got the whole franchise planned out. It'll be bigger than the avengers saga, then you won't be laughing! :p

    • @user-ze6yk4sd5g
      @user-ze6yk4sd5g 3 года назад +24

      @@kip258 I'll be crying for it to end.😅

    • @ComDenox
      @ComDenox 3 года назад +13

      We're only at 9, but it's been accurate for now

    • @benthesodaman6582
      @benthesodaman6582 3 года назад +13

      I wonder if he meant he's going to produce another 300 sequel.

  • @bostria
    @bostria Год назад +207

    The ending of the interview with the child falling asleep is both hilarious and adorable.

  • @XabioArts
    @XabioArts 5 лет назад +12950

    But I thought the onion did fake stuff...

    • @Tuckwolf000
      @Tuckwolf000 4 года назад +20

      Hello xabio

    • @brunther
      @brunther 3 года назад +11

      @@Tuckwolf000 Hello lucas

    • @Tuckwolf000
      @Tuckwolf000 3 года назад +1

      @@brunther do I know you?

    • @Tuckwolf000
      @Tuckwolf000 3 года назад +15

      Oh I get it 🤦🏼‍♂️

    • @alexanderphilip1809
      @alexanderphilip1809 3 года назад +9

      Yeah, we all did. But ofcourse we were wrong.

  • @Thrifty032781
    @Thrifty032781 6 лет назад +14554

    "She's a girl so she likes to kiss so she doesn't play with the cars but sometimes she does but mostly just the boys!"

  • @clarke4222
    @clarke4222 3 года назад +5674

    A real guy named Chris Morgan wrote Fast 5 and Wanted. Imagine getting your career ripped to shreds by the Onion, that would be awesome.

    • @timthorson52
      @timthorson52 3 года назад +288

      Well, as shitty as his movies are they somehow keep making money.

    • @neuvocastezero1838
      @neuvocastezero1838 3 года назад +418

      He would probably take it OK, it's not like he set out to write the next Citizen Kane, and he's probably living quite comfortably from the proceeds.

    • @mariolisa2832
      @mariolisa2832 3 года назад +77

      @@neuvocastezero1838 well said. Plus I now know his name and I wouldn’t have learnt it with out Onion

    • @dogkaisher8841
      @dogkaisher8841 3 года назад +53

      I mean Fast Five has become a fan favourite and was the last semi-realistic FF movie.

    • @lundylow
      @lundylow 3 года назад +129

      Someone included this sketch on his freakin' Wikipedia page.

  • @overvieweffect9034
    @overvieweffect9034 Год назад +93

    this aged EXTREMELY well

  • @fp5495
    @fp5495 3 года назад +3297

    "Yea, she's the girl and she likes to kiss so she doesn't play with the cars, but sometimes she does, but mostly with the boys."

    • @shaybae95
      @shaybae95 3 года назад +117

      Ctfu did he just call her a harlot 🤣

    • @HadassaMoon144
      @HadassaMoon144 3 года назад +200

      Most "just" the boys...(play with the cars). Really changes the meaning

    • @andrewmuse2756
      @andrewmuse2756 3 года назад +14

      isnt that Dominic Torreto's sister??
      she sometimes plays with the cars, but most of the time just boys do it. da fuq is this for real.
      have they gone mad

    • @drabnail777
      @drabnail777 3 года назад +16

      straight up 4th wall breaking facts

    • @Bleh67420
      @Bleh67420 3 года назад +9

      No words…a poet. They should’ve sent a poet.

  • @MegaCityPatrol
    @MegaCityPatrol 3 года назад +334

    That kid would be 15 now. They fired him when he was 11 and got his 3 year old cousin to write the last two movies

    • @everythingbox
      @everythingbox 3 года назад +18

      3 seems a little old. Think it was written by a new born that shits himself then takes a nap. Then they slapped some stamps on the full diaper and mailed it into the studio.

    • @betun130
      @betun130 Год назад +3

      @@everythingbox This is truly an underrated comment.

  • @schwartzhoffsteven
    @schwartzhoffsteven 10 лет назад +1665

    He should act in the movies, it would add depth.

    • @JJtoob
      @JJtoob 9 лет назад +46

      steven schwartzhoff He was the pizza delivery guy in the first movie, just with a lot of make up to make him look older.

    • @megugu2155
      @megugu2155 6 лет назад +7

      steven schwartzhoff everyone in the onion should be hired as movie actors

    • @BurgertubeFounder
      @BurgertubeFounder 6 лет назад +4

      Rumor has it he likes to slip in as a cameo every film.

  • @imjustsomeguy72
    @imjustsomeguy72 5 месяцев назад +18

    I think his early work was really the best. Once he got into his teens, I think he lost sight of just the cars going vroom.

    • @colinr0380
      @colinr0380 4 месяца назад

      Too much kissing with girls got in the way.

  • @gregorymyers3886
    @gregorymyers3886 3 года назад +1072

    I love how timeless this is. You can apply this forever to any Fast and Furious movie and it still works perfectly.

    • @jeremysolomon7791
      @jeremysolomon7791 Год назад +8

      Yep there is another one 😅

    • @kurtsudheim825
      @kurtsudheim825 Год назад +20

      Ya, 10 has just come out, se nonsense. Even well after the protagonist about died irl, thought they would end it there but nope..studio likes money

    • @Wailwulf
      @Wailwulf Год назад +23

      Everytime F&F posts a film, The Onion should pull out this clip, redub the title and replace clips with clips from the latest installment.

    • @vitor_kelps1548
      @vitor_kelps1548 Год назад +3

      And yet, they are really trying to reach the 600Th movie... Written by 5y.o. kids... Lol

    • @PolishBehemoth
      @PolishBehemoth Год назад

      ​@@vitor_kelps1548lol seriously

  • @SomeBlackGuy
    @SomeBlackGuy 3 года назад +4492

    Kid knocked it out of the park with 9

    • @None-Trick_Pony
      @None-Trick_Pony 3 года назад +81

      How are there fucking nine of them?

    • @zanedavis7378
      @zanedavis7378 3 года назад +214

      @@None-Trick_Pony I don’t know how they are going to top 9. In 8 they take down a submarine, so to top that they launch a fucking Pontiac fiero into space in 9. What is there left to do? Have Vin Diesel colonize Mars with the power of family?

    • @fnordisix7254
      @fnordisix7254 3 года назад +3

      🖤

    • @Iyadkay
      @Iyadkay 3 года назад +5

      What a prodigy!

    • @owenb8636
      @owenb8636 3 года назад +36

      @@zanedavis7378 I bet they storyboarded him going back in time using a car somehow but realised it had already been done

  • @flyrehash5124
    @flyrehash5124 4 года назад +4907

    I absolutely love that they made this without exploiting the kid's innocence by making lowbrow, explicit jokes. Super well done

    • @estheay3611
      @estheay3611 3 года назад +91

      I can only imagine how the real Chris Morgan would feel if he were to watch this..

    • @rodrigobraz2
      @rodrigobraz2 3 года назад +52

      There was a joke in there about the girl "doing the boys"

    • @user-sx4yu3nw4j
      @user-sx4yu3nw4j 3 года назад +213

      @@rodrigobraz2 clearly you weren’t listening

    • @rodrigobraz2
      @rodrigobraz2 3 года назад +8

      @@user-sx4yu3nw4j huh?

    • @mccperin
      @mccperin 3 года назад +339

      @@rodrigobraz2 he actually said "yeah she is a girl and she likes to kiss, and she lets the boys play w/ the cars, but sometimes she does, but mostly just the boys"

  • @joaolucasfraga9147
    @joaolucasfraga9147 Год назад +476

    They didn't exploit or mock the kid (the humor was literally about it being precisely what a kid would write), which is both basic decency and rare in some sketches involving children. It was adorable and funny. :)

    • @turdle69420
      @turdle69420 8 месяцев назад +31

      No shit. That's the joke. They are pretending the director is an actual 5 year old.

    • @mikkellarsen3643
      @mikkellarsen3643 6 месяцев назад +54

      ​@turdle2767 yeah, he was talking about how refreshing it is to see a sketch of this style where a kid isn't made fun of. Your comment feels unwarranted, especially with the tone.

    • @jeremytitus9519
      @jeremytitus9519 5 месяцев назад

      @@mikkellarsen3643don’t be too hard on Turdle, he’s a reptile and doesn’t understand the nuances of human communication

    • @stellviahohenheim
      @stellviahohenheim 5 месяцев назад +3

      ​@@mikkellarsen3643It's funny because it subverted your expectation

    • @CollinGerberding
      @CollinGerberding 5 месяцев назад +2

      Yep, let the material do the work instead. It lets the adults engage in the child's earestness without distracting from the actual joke.

  • @mrhappyheadmrhappyhead4966
    @mrhappyheadmrhappyhead4966 8 лет назад +3798

    surely a 5 year old could have come up with a better script.

    • @2lobo777
      @2lobo777 6 лет назад +44

      he did

    • @faithismine128
      @faithismine128 6 лет назад +192

      Creative differences with the director required extensive re-writing.

    • @rageagainstthehygiene2357
      @rageagainstthehygiene2357 5 лет назад +123

      He came up with it while he was three. Film production isn't instant, get with the program!

    • @meredithr9824
      @meredithr9824 5 лет назад +5

      What are our schools coming to, right??

    • @gogogogogirl
      @gogogogogirl 5 лет назад +2

      HAAAAA!!!!

  • @LaGuerre19
    @LaGuerre19 5 лет назад +2487

    *_I WANT THE CAWS TO DWIVE FAST AND SOMETIMES EXPWODE_*
    the math checks out, this is the average fast n furious franchise fan

    • @Johnny-rx4hs
      @Johnny-rx4hs 4 года назад +85

      This kid is probably wrote the Transformers movies too

    • @AdversaryOne
      @AdversaryOne 4 года назад +24

      ​@@Johnny-rx4hs You may be on to something. Only someone born five years prior would disregard the source material the way the writer of that film did.

    • @Trishkaz
      @Trishkaz 4 года назад +3

      OwO

    • @mccosmicdj5066
      @mccosmicdj5066 4 года назад +2

      😆 fuckin A....

    • @philithegamer8265
      @philithegamer8265 3 года назад

      @@Johnny-rx4hs And COD fans too...

  • @LesMiserables999
    @LesMiserables999 6 лет назад +5727

    I thought the Onion was satire?? I'm very confused

  • @CHRB-nn6qp
    @CHRB-nn6qp 2 месяца назад +4

    I think this might actually be my favourite video on the onion. There are funnier videos but something about this is so perfect

  • @internetklutterz5307
    @internetklutterz5307 4 года назад +658

    Chris no longer writes for the franchise. He quit in middle school realizing he was too old to write stories about cars.

    • @alphaduck2926
      @alphaduck2926 3 года назад +10

      Now he’s the CEO of a boring company and Tesla as well as SpaceX. Elon Musk sure is great.

    • @Ben-rz9cf
      @Ben-rz9cf 2 года назад +3

      I hear his son is writing them now

    • @vitor_kelps1548
      @vitor_kelps1548 Год назад +1

      Gladly they found another 5yo kid to write the movies and keep the quality...

  • @sebastianrodriguez8692
    @sebastianrodriguez8692 4 года назад +1528

    I don't know how this didn't blow up, because this is the sickest burn I've ever seen.

    • @RemixedVoice
      @RemixedVoice 4 года назад +37

      The Onion has always been well known fam

    • @raftlack4326
      @raftlack4326 4 года назад +6

      Only if youre in the known.

    • @AlexMafija
      @AlexMafija 3 года назад +10

      @@RemixedVoice not well enough to maintain the production cost it seems

    • @YoureNotAlexander
      @YoureNotAlexander 3 года назад +12

      Probably didn't blow up as a "burn" so to speak because most F&F fans who saw this didn't see any reason to feel insulted.

    • @ObscuredByTime
      @ObscuredByTime 3 года назад +11

      I know. I actually feel bad for any Fast and Furious fan over the age of 16 who watches this, because it's spot on accurate. How embarrassing.

  • @CU.SpaceCowboy
    @CU.SpaceCowboy 5 месяцев назад +18

    the “may i take off my shoes now” made this come across so genuine.

  • @ethangilchrist3534
    @ethangilchrist3534 5 лет назад +382

    Just noticed the scrolling words on the bottom of these videos
    "Advertisers rush to exploit newly discovered flaw in human psychology"
    Pure gold

  • @TheA8lee
    @TheA8lee 5 лет назад +1855

    That is a smart kid to play those lines out with anything other than pure, innocent sincerity.
    They either duped him brilliantly or he is just a excessively smart, young man. At his age I communicated using a sophisticated code of grunts and caveman expressions.

    • @prchristle
      @prchristle 4 года назад +84

      I still do lol

    • @Storm_x
      @Storm_x 4 года назад +41

      5 year olds are getting more clever as generations pass

    • @maelstrom2313
      @maelstrom2313 4 года назад +134

      Pretty sure they just asked him to describe the shots they played with a few scripted lines thown in.. Lol. You can only expect so much from a five year old

    • @deckie_
      @deckie_ 4 года назад +22

      Tbf, the actor's probably a bit older than 5

    • @hectichive889
      @hectichive889 4 года назад +12

      @Cole444Train, No it was actually completely necessary. He said “...smart, young man.” Two adjectives next to each other need a comma. Your example is nothing the same: “The red, car.” Red is an adjective and car is a noun. So no comma needed there. They’re two completely different situations

  • @Xiams
    @Xiams 3 года назад +1019

    Today I read the 9-year old son of the Fast 9 director was the one who dreamed up the magnetic plane scene. Once again the Onion was prophetic!

    • @prestonphillips473
      @prestonphillips473 3 года назад +63

      I read that today too. I instantly thought about this video and had to watch it again. SO good. I hope Jim Pig Haggerty is doing okay out there on his farm.

    • @Xiams
      @Xiams 3 года назад +7

      @@prestonphillips473 I thought of this video too! Great minds!!

    • @babywolf4238
      @babywolf4238 3 года назад +32

      The Onion's not prophetic, reality just keeps playing itself.

    • @lobitome
      @lobitome 3 года назад +10

      To be fair, it obviously doesn't take much imagination to write/produce these movies.

    • @theglitchcounter264
      @theglitchcounter264 3 года назад +32

      @@lobitome I don’t know, it takes a ridiculous amount of mental gymnastics to use a fundamental understanding of something and use “logic” to butcher it so far beyond logic that even in universe it makes no sense.

  • @MVIVN
    @MVIVN Год назад +56

    Amazing that this is a video from 12 years ago and not only is the franchise still going, it’s even MORE ridiculous and over-the-top than it was then 😂

  • @austincde
    @austincde 4 года назад +1470

    The fact that fast five was 8 years ago makes me weep, this kids in high school now lol

    • @roddydykes7053
      @roddydykes7053 4 года назад +160

      Pretty crazy, before you know it this comment will have a “10 years ago” tag beside it

    • @volzman2172
      @volzman2172 4 года назад +62

      The sad thing is he is too old for the franchise.

    • @shnouth5391
      @shnouth5391 4 года назад +8

      Wouldnt he be going into 8th grade just now?

    • @petergray2712
      @petergray2712 4 года назад +22

      @Oliva Gina Don't worry, his six year old baby brother Tristan had a co-writing credit in the last movie, and he's ready to take the reins.

    • @FirstnameLastname-zc6ym
      @FirstnameLastname-zc6ym 4 года назад +2

      this kids 1 year younger than i am

  • @YowLife
    @YowLife 3 года назад +1677

    This child is now a teenager.

    • @atticus4112
      @atticus4112 3 года назад +93

      Wow you know math

    • @Vichedges
      @Vichedges 3 года назад +66

      Maybe he’s dead?

    • @willwesten3749
      @willwesten3749 3 года назад +25

      And im officially old

    • @willwesten3749
      @willwesten3749 3 года назад +24

      @@Vichedges its a possibility

    • @rutwikpatel6659
      @rutwikpatel6659 3 года назад +9

      He is the chosen one. He would stop the eternal suffering caused by the infinite sequels of Fast and Furious.

  • @Knight69.
    @Knight69. 3 года назад +200

    "California wildfire engulfs previous wildfire in flames" THIS IS TOO GOOD I CANT

    • @alexander-mauricemillamlae4567
      @alexander-mauricemillamlae4567 2 года назад +2

      Outrageous what wildfires do to other wildfires, somebody should do something about that. Maybe drain more areas of groundwater so wildfires have more space to roam on their own. Oh and we should feed them too with oil, hay and some such. A content wildfire is a strong wildfire.

  • @ilikethiskindatube
    @ilikethiskindatube Год назад +42

    That's what I love about fast and furious screenwriters. I get older and they stay the same age

  • @coldnhot369
    @coldnhot369 7 лет назад +275

    This kid is a true genius. I enjoyed his latest movie, "Fate of the Furious". Can't wait to see the next bazillion movies. Keep up the work kiddo.

  • @nii_amart
    @nii_amart 4 года назад +5308

    "...is there a chance we're gonna see more Fast & Furious sequels?"
    "Yeah"
    "How many"
    "600"
    Lmao 😂

    • @lowtherlars
      @lowtherlars 4 года назад +30

      This was prescient

    • @akashmann2971
      @akashmann2971 4 года назад +61

      He wasn't lying bro. I think that's gonna happen.

    • @cool_scorpio2588
      @cool_scorpio2588 4 года назад +5

      More or less.

    • @nii_amart
      @nii_amart 4 года назад +10

      @@adamlevine6700 yep. more like saw the clip and quoted it as my funniest part of the clip.

    • @rasheeqahmed1208
      @rasheeqahmed1208 4 года назад +3

      As Onion's prophetic words and visions coming into fruition, this would probably turn out to be true too.

  • @dakotafre1913
    @dakotafre1913 4 года назад +4498

    Sadly Chris was fired by the studio five years later for past racial jokes on twitter

    • @Lu4455
      @Lu4455 4 года назад +443

      And then he was replaced by a guy who posted a racial joke yesterday.

    • @malhar__8932
      @malhar__8932 4 года назад +208

      Now he writes Sherlock Holmes fanfics with homorotic subtext !

    • @techbuilder1147
      @techbuilder1147 3 года назад +16

      What a comment

    • @burdenernie6050
      @burdenernie6050 3 года назад +108

      He didn't know what he was saying they were his first words

    • @megan92585
      @megan92585 3 года назад +6

      Like count at 666, pausing for conspiracy theorists to weigh in. LoL

  • @J-RAD_notAnNpc
    @J-RAD_notAnNpc 4 месяца назад +4

    "And then the car brought the box!" 😂🤣 This is legit exactly what i always thought when this movie changed the Fast and furious series into over the top childrens movies 😂

  • @yoadrie
    @yoadrie 10 лет назад +1689

    It's all about the demographics -- in this case, five-year-old male adults.

    • @euphoricatheist6694
      @euphoricatheist6694 6 лет назад +52

      The face of white supremacy. Look at him, exercising his white privilege...

    • @AddBowIfGirl
      @AddBowIfGirl 5 лет назад +17

      Brie Larson Haters: Movies should only have white males in them and the occasional girl for fucking.

    • @ToBeSchooled
      @ToBeSchooled 4 года назад +1

      @@AddBowIfGirl what other movies are there?

    • @AddBowIfGirl
      @AddBowIfGirl 4 года назад +4

      Gaiden Shinji
      I know it sounds good to most white males. That’s why I said it. Your kind tend to be extremely selfish and self-centered and unable to see humanity and relatability in those who are a different sex or color from you. You’re a very flawed and broken group.

    • @AddBowIfGirl
      @AddBowIfGirl 4 года назад

      BanthemOnCraftcadia
      Bad ones apparently.

  • @shokvalu8819
    @shokvalu8819 2 года назад +284

    This kid is genuinely so damn sweet, I love him so much lol. I hope he's doing well for himself nowadays.

    • @NickHunter
      @NickHunter 4 месяца назад +4

      I hear he's working as script director on Guy Ritchie's next movie

    • @tinbanger66
      @tinbanger66 3 месяца назад +3

      Hopefully they didn't replace him while he was napping!

  • @euphoricatheist6694
    @euphoricatheist6694 6 лет назад +709

    Fake. No way the screenwriter is older than 4.

    • @sudocatsda1guy390
      @sudocatsda1guy390 4 года назад +2

      Fast And Furios wasn't the low grade amateur shitshow it became after the 7th film

    • @heqrusteoffde739
      @heqrusteoffde739 2 года назад

      @@sudocatsda1guy390 it always was

  • @twally87
    @twally87 Год назад +24

    nice touch that Chris Morgan is actually the name of Fast Five's screenwriter

  • @Tesla_Death_Ray
    @Tesla_Death_Ray 7 лет назад +249

    i prefer his early work

    • @precogtyrant
      @precogtyrant 4 года назад +12

      His early work was a little too new wave for my taste.

    • @hamzasaid3368
      @hamzasaid3368 4 года назад +16

      @@precogtyrant but when fast 2 came out in 09, I think he really grew into his own

    • @ai8817
      @ai8817 4 года назад +9

      yeah, i feel like his work has dropped in quality after he came out of the womb

    • @Tesla_Death_Ray
      @Tesla_Death_Ray 3 года назад

      @@hamzasaid3368 both commercially and artistically

  • @nomadben
    @nomadben 7 лет назад +354

    1:32 "California wildfire engulfs previous wildfire in flames"

  • @pengwin9210
    @pengwin9210 3 года назад +102

    Geez, no wonder they're always talking about "family" in the Fast and Furious movies... the writer just wants his mommy. It makes so much sense.

    • @mark9294
      @mark9294 5 месяцев назад

      Or daddy

  • @FifthConcerto
    @FifthConcerto 3 месяца назад +3

    Every time my six year old describes an adventure sequence, it will now have Vin Diesel in it when I picture it in my head.

  • @alexparadise91
    @alexparadise91 2 года назад +107

    This is genuinely funny and adorable at the same time. “Can I take my shoes off now?”

  • @ken_caminiti
    @ken_caminiti 5 лет назад +296

    Brilliant satire. 'Then there's a hole in train and the car goes out of the hole.' Christ that's hilarious.

    • @christianeriksen7907
      @christianeriksen7907 4 года назад

      He's describing the infantile plot.

    • @dougchampion8084
      @dougchampion8084 4 года назад +1

      It's not satire in the way it seems you're implying though. They didn't write that line for the kid, they showed the kid the scene and asked him what happened.

  • @elmSTREETnasty
    @elmSTREETnasty 7 лет назад +480

    Just when you thought The Onion was satire, they slip in some truth.

  • @ChrisMorganComedy
    @ChrisMorganComedy Год назад +23

    I was happy to do the interview guys

  • @lachlanbell8390
    @lachlanbell8390 3 года назад +117

    After ten years, the only change is that this is even MORE accurate today than it was in 2011.

  • @zamhar
    @zamhar 3 года назад +42

    just watched Fast and Furious 9's trailer... this kid is still at it.

  • @austinwilwayco
    @austinwilwayco 3 года назад +44

    “How many more are you going to make?”
    *“600”*
    Sounds about right

  • @thegoodthebadtheoffended6548
    @thegoodthebadtheoffended6548 Год назад +88

    He actually comes from a very talented family... his younger brother wrote the Transformers sequels, (but not the first one.) And his baby sister wrote all three Jurassic World movies that followed the original 3 Jurassic Park movies.

    • @vitor_kelps1548
      @vitor_kelps1548 Год назад +10

      And he's younger cousin wrote the rest of F&F cause this kid was way to older to write F&F movies when he became a 8yo kid...

    • @me-myself-i787
      @me-myself-i787 Год назад +4

      And his other sister wrote every Illumination film except Despicable Me.

    • @Peter-oy6nz
      @Peter-oy6nz 5 месяцев назад +1

      Jurassic park 3 was written by the his uncle who still lives in Nana's basement and always smells funny. Alan!

  • @MrFreedomforyou
    @MrFreedomforyou 5 лет назад +190

    The funny thing is 8 years later they are still coming out with these movies and they even have spin offs now

  • @PHOBlIA
    @PHOBlIA 4 года назад +44

    9 years later, we're at fast and furious 9 and this video is still relevant

  • @5gonza541
    @5gonza541 5 лет назад +15

    2:07 “And when we come back we will talk to an old women who thinks it’s 1958 and I’m her dead husband” Wtf lmao

    • @TheSadCatt
      @TheSadCatt 5 лет назад +1

      I do that every Tuesday

  • @PayterX
    @PayterX Месяц назад +18

    At the beginning around 0:10 - “Report: Donald Trump has no true friends”. This video was uploaded in 2011 lol

  • @LostCause-69
    @LostCause-69 7 лет назад +247

    Where is the interview with the old woman who thinks it is 1958 and thinks Jim is her dead husband? I was really wanted to see that one.

  • @avacharlotte4580
    @avacharlotte4580 3 года назад +29

    0:16 my heart melted

  • @Ghostofenzo
    @Ghostofenzo 6 лет назад +477

    “Can I take off my shoes now?” Haha

  • @welcomestranger
    @welcomestranger Год назад +18

    I can't believe this clip is 12 years old. It feels as relevant as ever.

  • @ezragreiner5773
    @ezragreiner5773 5 лет назад +69

    "can i take my shoes off now?" LOL

  • @LuisCalderon_HN
    @LuisCalderon_HN 4 года назад +75

    Glad to see that Chris is still active and is one of F9's screenwriters

    • @GregoryTheGr8ster
      @GregoryTheGr8ster 4 года назад +11

      Won't he be too old now? He won't have that child-like imagination any more at his age now.

    • @estheay3611
      @estheay3611 3 года назад

      @@GregoryTheGr8ster His imagination can't be child-like if it's actually from the mind of a child

    • @MachoMan_Vert
      @MachoMan_Vert 2 года назад +1

      @@GregoryTheGr8ster nah, he still pretty much got it. Tyrese and Ludicrous going to space on a Pontiac fiero to ram a death satellite?
      Now that's classic Chris right there.

  • @Kindafu
    @Kindafu 9 лет назад +117

    OMG I almost laughed my kidneys out of back

  • @danielcervantes5294
    @danielcervantes5294 Год назад +30

    How is this skit 12 years old and still as relevant as ever lmao

  • @shandhi5391
    @shandhi5391 5 лет назад +34

    Next up: Onion interviews 6 year old screenwriter of Game of Thrones season 8

  • @iGoSaiko
    @iGoSaiko 2 года назад +14

    1:26 “California wildfire engulfs previous wildfire in flames” the one time the Onion wasn’t joking lol

  • @allenm4947
    @allenm4947 9 лет назад +81

    God this couldn't be more accurate

  • @MikeyChalupa47
    @MikeyChalupa47 Год назад +16

    One of the greatest Onion videos ever.

  • @dranflame_1236
    @dranflame_1236 3 года назад +34

    "We'll talk to an old woman who think it's 1958 and I'm her dead husband" lol

  • @hannesjakobsson765
    @hannesjakobsson765 4 года назад +57

    The "600" joke gets funnier every time a new Fast and the Furios film comes out

  • @thomasspengler9044
    @thomasspengler9044 3 года назад +25

    This is how I imagine Michael bay would respond during an interview about his transformers movies

  • @condemnedpotbelly8491
    @condemnedpotbelly8491 6 месяцев назад +8

    Wow...he described the movie perfectly
    That's exactly how I remember it

  • @cutecommie
    @cutecommie 6 лет назад +292

    I really want to know what the actor thinks about this, now that he's a teenager.

    • @watermelonhead8054
      @watermelonhead8054 5 лет назад +84

      oh my fucking god dont do that to me

    • @myawsomebox
      @myawsomebox 5 лет назад +162

      He’s probably too busy writing the next Fast and Furious to pour over old interviews.

    • @randgrithr7387
      @randgrithr7387 5 лет назад +50

      Actor? You mean director.

    • @rohanofelvenpower5566
      @rohanofelvenpower5566 5 лет назад +2

      Socialism or Barbarygmos hes 13 now? not a teenager haha

    • @MiniM69
      @MiniM69 5 лет назад +24

      No, he’s changed his name to distance himself from, in his own words, his infantile earliest attempts at capturing true human emotion and more than grunts from Vin Diesel”.

  • @mikvance
    @mikvance 9 лет назад +373

    Hello NASA? Can you find my sides?

    • @Cjnw
      @Cjnw 4 года назад +2

      **ArIaNa GrAnDe HaS eNtErEd ThE cHaT**

  • @jljl7225
    @jljl7225 3 года назад +80

    Actually it is very rare that a kid can "act" like a kid perfectly. Either this is not acting at all or one of the best performances in history

    • @TheBestAsbestos13
      @TheBestAsbestos13 Год назад +34

      I think some was improv (Can I take my shoes off now?) and some was clever editing. For the descriptions of the scenes I bet the crew showed him the scenes, then asked him about what he saw, and cut in the footage of his answer. It was way too authentic to be scripted on the kiddo's part.

  • @PowerGlove79
    @PowerGlove79 Год назад +6

    Today he lives alone in his L.A. condo. Sitting in the light of another sunset with a pouch of Capri Sun his only friend now . While he wonders, “When did I lose the magic touch?” .

  • @virtuousvillainy4248
    @virtuousvillainy4248 10 лет назад +548

    I usually don't like children, but this one is really adorable and knows how to make movies too!

    • @atlasmonkeyleon
      @atlasmonkeyleon 6 лет назад +45

      Virtuous Villainy Well, I usually don‘t like black people, but Samuel L. Jackson is pretty cool.

    • @ltkirov
      @ltkirov 6 лет назад +23

      well I usually dont like people who dont like kids but adam sandler is pretty cool

    • @mcmoistyboi4662
      @mcmoistyboi4662 5 лет назад +11

      I usually don't like woman, but Jennifer Lawrence is pretty cool

    • @theswamps6589
      @theswamps6589 5 лет назад +35

      I hate all of you.

    • @jackpeterson305
      @jackpeterson305 5 лет назад +8

      @@theswamps6589 i hate you more