MST3k 819 - Invasion of the Neptune Men
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- Опубликовано: 9 сен 2024
- Please...just go away...I can't think of anything marginally witty to write about this incredibly bad film...my soul...dying...moose...Indian...
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mst3konline.blo... - a list of every episode available for online streaming!
I’ve been watching this particular episode every night for a week now to fall asleep to. And tonight won’t be any different.
People are going to wonder why your laugh is changing, so just be prepared for some awkward questions.
I do suffer from Rogipanty Complex so that will explain a lot
I took watch MST3K every night to fall asleep to... I love the black and white space movies the most.. for whatever reason! I see you posted your comment 5 mo's ago... What are you watching to fall asleep to now? Happy New Year btw!
@@amandabourke796I switched ( after many weeks) to Prince of Space and the last month or so the very boring movie, but hilarious riffs MSTK3k episode of Red Zone Cuba. I think I know every line from that episode. I like the b&w films the best too and sci fi are always the best! Tonight though I’m missing Neptune men, so here I am. Happy New Year to you as well 🙂
@@amandabourke796 I do the same thing. I'm partial to "The projected man", and "Quest of the delta knights". They put me right out!
"Scientists labor to figure out what the hell is the deal with Japan..." -Mike
Rumor has it their successors are still at it today. I certainly don't know the answer and I would have assumed scientists would have let us know if they'd figured it out.
"Hey Mike, was there a Hitler building where you grew up?"
"Not um.... no"
I tested negative for COVID, but I did test positive for Pro-G Panty Complex. Pray for me.
Roji Panty Complex is a Democrat hoax. Tucker Carlson told me so. And he's a smart guy.
Oh dear Lord, you'll never get them off. Those panties will be stuck to your skin Aaaagh.
Rest In Peace, Sonny Chiba! The best Lower Atmosphere Chief we could ask for.
He got to be Hattori Hanzo before he died
@@GenY42
Are you kidding?
Hattori Hanzo, one of the most intriguing characters of all time. When you draw a Hanzo
it must taste blood.
At least his kid is kicking ass now. Mackenyu is hot!
RIP, Wispy Bachelor
It was genuinely touching seeing (Phantom of) Krankor coming back to cheer them all up.
I like to believe Bill still has the costume and puts in on to walk the dog.
@@damian6631 Many years later Bill would repurpose his Phantom of Krankor laugh to make fun of the Ice Cream Bunny
You the bird
@@GenY42 HURRR HUR HURRRRRR.....now I can't unhear it
Ya scum!
Still watching in 2018... This was the first MST3K episode I watched, back in like 97 or 98, I was in 3rd grade. And that's where it all started for me. Started recording every episode from here on. Ahhh those were the days
Same. I thought they were all as bad as this.
Still watching in 2022. My first episode was Catalina Caper and I was like 26. When people started putting these up on RUclips, I wept with joy.
Hell yes they were! Only I was a junior in high school then..... godamnit I'm getting old
@@Volyu What?
my story is very similar. except The Final Sacrifice was the first episode I saw.
55:42 "filmed in a ghetto of Kingston, Jamaica" MST3K mentioned my birthplace (not the ghetto part). I'm unashamedly excited!
“What times are it?” For some reason, never fails to make me chuckle.
"You know, Space Chief should really try going _up into space_ sometime. Yeah, he's more like 'lower atmosphere chief.'"
"Barely off the stupid ground Chief"
One of the most amazing, mind-bending aspects of comparing this film to Prince of Space is the fact that Prince of Space was 12 times more coherent - and it was sliced together episodes of a TV show. This movie - hurts. But the way they riff it is one of my favs!!!!!
that was originally a TV show?? interesting, never knew that.
Say whatever you want about Prince of Space, but Invasion of the Neptune Men makes Prince of Space look like a masterpiece. It’s at least entertaining and as you said coherent. This is boring and feels way too padded out.
The dubbed voices are even more ridiculous in this one. I think it actually helps lol.
Prince of Space at least had kooky, but interesting enemies. The Neptune Men are just kinda there.
Also, there were few movies riffed in the SciFi Channel era that gave deep hurting, but this one came close.
"Space Chief failed miserably, and tried to cover up his shame!"
"Barely off the stupid ground Chief."
RIP Sonny 'Space Chief' Chiba.
I just love the opening sketch. It goes from being about a National Geographic article and then becoming a Vietnam War satire in the span of five minutes. Gotta love the writers.
Mike...
I love the Kabuki theater sketch more. Kind of an Abbott and Costello thing with the Noh Theater.
RIP Sonny Chiba. Thankfully you went on to have an amazing career after this movie, and will be fondly remembered.
I just think it's funny that the aliens actually call Neptune the same thing we call it
Yeah, that is very odd. What are the chances of that…. zero I’d say
The universe is a big place. There's bound to be _some_ coincidences.
The G is silent in their language.
Are they actually speaking English then. I guess you’re supposed to think they have their own word for it that just ”translates” as Neptune to us
Prince of Space was a goofy looking hero, but at least he was actively fighting the villain throughout the entire film unlike Space Chief.
Agreed, considering how Space Chief/Tabana spent so much of his time in the lab
That was because PoS's every-day guise was that a bootblack, while SC was a scientist.
@@alexmuenster2102 gotta admit though, space chief is cooler sounding than prince of space
@@alexmuenster2102
WE LIKE IT VERY MUCH
luv his souped up '59 Dodge.
RIP Sonny Chiba. I know you were in plenty of better movies, but this is the one I know the best.
HE's in this movie? Who is he . . . in the movie? 'Who is he' almost sounds like iT belongs in that noh theatre sketch.
@@andrewfrankovic6821 He’s Space Chief. I didn’t realize until a few years ago myself 😂.
Hatori Hanzo!
The Krankor visit is one of their very best host segments ever. Genius.
You the bird
They made the Krankor outfit, might as well get as much mileage out of it as they can.
Bill did an incredible turn, as Krankor! He had me at: "Your logic is IRREFUTABLE!". Love at first sight. He got so whipped up, towards the end of the Sci-Fi era. Intense! 🏆
You’re not wrong.
@@southfloridaarcheryguy114 I was just watching another great host segment in crash of the moons. It’s the one about an hour and a half in where Crow has written another screenplay. Absolutely hilarious.
"No matter how many he blows up there's always three! He neither adds to nor subtracts from their numbers!" That's one of my favorite riffs ever.
"Paul is a dead man, miss him, miss him."
Cracks me up every time.
The upside of this is that we aren't getting invaded by the Uranus men.
This is like a poor man's version of Prince of Space. Which is saying a lot.
A poor man couldn't AFFORD the Prince of Space. This is like the Dowager Regent Duke of Space. Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Space, Space, Space...
Those two films go together like ham and eggs.
Damn....you speak the truth
@@charlesodell804 Green Eggs and Ham . So said Sam I am .
@@charlesodell804 I got the actual movies on DVD (without MST3K) and they came on a double pack.
Just felt right having them there together like that.
Didn’t realize until this week that Space Chief was The Street Fighter/Hatori Honzo himself Sonny Chiba. Truly a loss to the world of cinema..
18;:17 I remember once at college, the clock stopped & started going backwards. One of the girls laughed & said, "soon it''l be yesterday." Then it stopped & started going forward. I said, "Maybe it'll be tomorrow today."
"thank God"
"And his son, Santa Claus"
😂 how did I never hear that one before?!
I'm 26 and yes people are still here watching these uploads and yes we all fucking love you for putting them on RUclips!
I had an uncle from Neptune. He had morbid fear of falling through the floor
I love how during the air battle scene they just start chatting about everything from Servos feelings on origami and the sticky thing under Crow's seat 😂
On a rare Godzilla-free day, the kids are trying to catch Mothra.
The "Noh" theater skit is MST3k's nod to the classic "Who's On First" sketch made famous by Abbott and Costello.
I cannot belive I didn't watch MST3K At all while it was on cable, can't watch TV anymore, I need, tha riffin'
THE GREATEST SHOW FROM AMERICA
Well you do know there are Riff tracks avail on DVD AND Mst3k DVD box sets right?
Good man. Well said, sir.
I love how they laugh nearly every single time the kids talk.
I love how, when the kids are blabbing to the adults, they say "Space Chief saved us!" as if anyone there should know who in the world they're talking about. XD
"Get the cane" lol
Maybe he’s like a local eccentric or something
1:23:58 - "I know a song about stock footage; it goes like this: EAT IT, MOVIE!!" I'm crying!
Invasion of the Neptune Men makes Prince of Space look like Seven Samurai.
lmao
Makes Godzilla's Revenge watchable.
Yes the only worse film I ever saw was called fearless frank starring jon vioght after that stinker I almost tore my eyes out like Oedipus rex it made this film look like henry the 5th starring laurence Olivier !!
A little harsh.
17:22 It's over 200 mAs!
That makes me chuckle every single time I think about it.
"Servo, what does the scouter say about its power level?"
"It's over 200 mAs!"
"What 200 mAs?!"
Saw a car yesterday with ,'MST3K' on the license plate. How nostalgic.
That’s nothing. Out on the road today, I saw a Deadhead sticker on a Cadillac.
@@sardonicus76out on the road today I saw a black flag sticker on a cadillac
the words "take two" were never said during the entire filming of this movie
Because they spoke Japanese.
This could easily have been a Roger Corman film
@@RatelHBadger Roger Corman has standards.
Not true. Some of the cast members had their mothers on set during particularly painful shoots. Their mom would say "take two" and hand them advil and water.
Film is expensive.
A haiku for this movie:
Six horrid children
Space Chief brings shame to us all
Hitler rides and games
Double thumbs up for you.
it's snowing on mt. fuji.
What does HAIKU means?
@@gochem3013 a Japanese poem that has 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second line, and 5 in the third line.
Little boys talk weird
Coo like fairy-tale maidens
Funny or creepy?
Of all the planets, Neptune doesn't get enough love
@rickybobby6579 Hey thanks Earthman. We Netunians really appreciate it. You know we invade we won't forget your recognition of our seclusion. Fuck Mars right?!!
These guys would have to be from Triton or something because Neptune is just gas.
22 people will not be invited to the Bullett-Head Family reunion.
Badly dubbed children
A worthless superhero
It's snowing on Mt. Fuji
Steve Smith That's 5-7-7, not 5-7-5. How about..."Snow on Mt. Fuji" as your last line...evoke an image of stillness and peace as we try to meditate away the harsh images of record-player-headed aliens blowing up Hitler buildings....
analogkid01 It's a reference to the channel Game Grumps, specifically the Sonic Boom series.
EnzianOfficial So basically it's fucking cancer.
Nice haiku
+analogkid01 Snow on Mt Fuji
Young boys for Michael Jackson
Analogkid ROCKS!
I nearly spat my water all over the place when I saw the Hitler building. What the Fuck?
Alex Greggary - Stock war footage.
1:14:29 - It's not stock footage - the building has (Japanese?) characters on the side and top of the building - as well as 'Mine (oddly not the German 'Mein" ) Kam(pf?) to the right of Hitler - my guess is it's some kind of department store promotion thing. Anyone read Japanese out there?
Strict rule, I don't eat or drink during MST
The Noh theater segment is one of my favorite segments in MST3K.
Tom looked amazing in his Kabuki outfit.
Shrill kid: "WHERE'D THEY GO?!"
Servo: "I DUNNO, ROCKY!"
That gets me every time XD XD XD
Oops, I think it was Crow, my bad X)
every episode of MST3K has at least one joke that drops me to the floor with explosive laughter... in Neptune Men Mike's riff after 30:03 is that joke... thanks for your patience...
Everytime I hear someone shout "DO NOT PANIC", I immediately think, "RELAX, AND ENJOY YOUR SHOES!"
Roji Panty Complex..... this is the episode that hooked me on mst3k!
wow this is a rough episode to start with, it is one terrible movie, but I'm just glad the show hooked you too
When Phantom of Krankor showed up, I think I felt the same amount of excitement/relief/appreciation that they did.
I wonder if the Noh theater bit was Mike "getting back" at the bots for the eyelash mites.
It just dawned on me,
Space Chief was totally useless in this, the humans were able to combat the invasion by themselves.
+GlassPinata Sanchez Space Chief is actually that assistant scientist at the beginning that showed the video to the kid. Yes, the movie is that much of a ripoff of Prince of Space.
+Eric McNaughton Yes, but both were made by Toei, so does that count?
Did Neptune come out before or after Prince of Space?
+Eric McNaughton Prince of Space 1959 Neptune 1961
@@mcnaughe I figured that but the movie does a really garbage job of telling us.
So they invade Earth with one ship and a half dozen guys?
With guys like these as their opposition, can you blame them for not thinking they needed to commit more?
While the Japanese Army plays freeze tag!
The Hitler building shot is easily the most WTF moment in MST3K - or just plain movie history.
I loved the Hitler Building. Poor Bunker Restaurant.
And the Hard Reich Cafe
@@primepm8861 Sounds great..I'm Goering..
How many sets a day do you folks do ? How long will you be at hilarities lol
It's a candy mint AND a breath mint. It's the U,S. MINT.
"Space Chief failed miserably, and tried to cover up his shame!" Such an underrated song.
I love some of their in-the-middle-of-the movie lyrics "There's a girl on the roof and she thinks she's a cat" and "chord chord chord chord chord chord other chord" and "It's the 80's, do a lot of coke and vote for Ronald Reagan."
One of my all time favorite MST3K. All the Japanese films they did are great. Thanks for posting, been watching and re-watching for years! BTW, @1:14:28, the Hitler building may be a museum advertisement or an advance ad for the 1962 Hollywood film, "Hitler", starring Richard Basehart! That's Gypsy's favorite actor!
@11:10
Me: this scene gives off Lord of the Flies vibes
Mike Nelson: He must be the Piggy of the group.
Great minds lol.
“Major Glenn and I are to be married.”
I was looking through the MST3K line-up for something to help me sleep when I saw your comment. Coincidentally, (and very sadly), I just read that John Glenn's wife recently died from Covid-19. She was 100 years old! OMG!
This is absolutely fascinating.
@@terrytobias7572
God Bless her & all her who Love her.
"... Space Chief, failed miserably... and tried to cover up his shame...."
"Thank God they carry Clinique at the PX, eh?" I still have no idea why that's the funniest damn thing I've ever heard, but it is.
"Sergeants Gladys and Peggy."
Ughhh....that...was...excruciating. Thanks goodness for Mike & the Bots. Deep hurting....
I know right? I also wanted to tell you I liked your profile picture thingie. Hufflepuff for the win!
It wasn’t quite THAT bad.
That Noh Theater sketch and the Hitler Building bit make this one of the best episodes
The part with the nanite vs eyelash mite war on Mikes face was hilarious
What are eyelash mites?
and so my binge-a-thon oif MST3K japanese movies continues! with one of my all time fav episodes *tears of joy *
I was disappointed that the end credits did not include "Krankor: himself."
The heartwarming return of Ambassador Phantom of the planet Krankor. What a guy! 😁
This movie is 45% shrill, obnoxious kids; 50% dudes looking at monitors; 5% actual World War II bombing footage used in a kids movie (a fucking kids movie, for Christ's sake!) and 100% pain.
"Are you Luxembourg!?"
"No..."
"Then *_SHUT UP!!!!_*"
The Neptune Men look like rejected Doctor Who monsters
That's... that's really bad.
Exterminate! Exterminate!
Well we all love Doctor Who but Doctor Who is a slow moving show slow
They never even made it to the drawing board
Doctor Who _rejected_ monsters? You definitely couldn't prove that from what made it on the screen.
"Suppository Man!"
Andrea EssEmm They look like Tottemo Luckyman rejects.
I think that’s my favorite joke.
The part where Tom starts pretending it is the Magnificent Ambersons is great!
"Sir, can the security guard be dismissed?"
Yes, I'd say his opinion doesn't matter. Dismiss him completely!
i like when old movies zoom in on speakers
"That's Space Chief! He's real! It's Space Chief, guys! He's real! YAAAYY!!! *spaceship flies off as music swells to a crescendo*" Crow: Well, you know that really wasn't that bad.
Prince of Space had Phantom of Krankor and little baby sunhats.
This has Sonny Chiba and Hitler.
It's a tie as far as I'm concerned.
Yes, it's a horrid film, but they squeeze some great riffs out of it. Lines like, "Tojo's death car,"; "Shoot at us all you want, just get Bill Mahr,"; "But we're Japanes children, we can go anywhere we want,"; "Great stock footage - I'd rather see VEGETABLE stock!";"Ru-Paul?!"; "He's more like Lower Atmosphere Chief,"; "They're being defeated by a wispy bachelor," and "They're making the Chicken Men of Krankor look super confident and dignified," as well as the Hitler building (because Germany and Japan were part of the Axis), Rogie Panty Complex, annoying and terribly-dubbed Japanese children, the Eyelash Sketch and Krankor's visit make it a decent experience.
Most MST3K episodes have a lot of moments where you can at least chuckle, but you could tell they were even having a hard time coming up for stuff with this one. This one is always the hardest one to get through, but the Hitler building makes it worth it. One of the few lol moments on this one and one of the best ones of all time. Too bad it was in one of the worst episodes.
sprybug I don't agree that this was a "worst" episode. Just look at what Greg said above...
“Suppository man!”
“Children of the pot.”
"Chief Chef?"
55:35 "Where'd they go?" "I dunno, Rocky!"
"Don't worry kids, it's a commercial gimmick for sushi cereal!"
Did the alien ever find his record?
Just before they explode at the end, he finds his record. Crow says so.
Fun fact: Krankor and the Satellite of Love remain friends to this day.
The "have you seen my record" bit always, always cracks me up. This is definitely one of my favorites.
R.I.P. Sonny Chiba.
"The clocks are running backwards!" That means lunch wont be until yesterday!
I remember watching this episode on the Sci-Fi Channel in the early 2000s and thought that was the best line in the entire episode.
what happened to the eye?
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That's funny yesterday....but it was funny 😄
Check out the wikipedia page for "Invasion of the Neptune Men" (for what wikipedia is worth anyway). The original movie absolutely used stock war footage, but Mike and the other staff writers thought that was in especially terrible taste (especially considering it's a childrens movie), and omitted that scene from the MST3K version.
Although, even with that in mind... I don't think the Hitler scene was a part of the actual war footage (which I haven't seen).
"A tiny stick! No!! Cancel the invasion!"
I never get tired of watching this one.
RIP Sonny "Space Chief" Chiba
I can't stop saying "I must look into it all properly, first." It's satisfying.
Holy shit, the "Triumph of the Will" and Pinochet references!
Well no one ever said the SOL crew were stupid. So... That Hitler Monument is almost beyond belief...
This and Prince of Space have a weird thing going on where there are no individual characters, there are just blobs of people who always stand close together.
RIP Sonny Chiba
1:23:55 I literally burst out laughing at Tom's stock footage song every time!
That's how I feel like reacting whenever I see an insultingly bad movie
I've watched a few of these classics and for the second time, Tom Servo experienced a nervous break down.
that description of eyelash creatures gets me every time
"Being defeated by a whispy bachelor" Sooo funny!
You're very welcome. Some Japanese movie aficionados gave me more details. They shot the actual building and made a montage with explosion footages (so it's not a miniature.) The reason why they picked that one specific building was pure convenience: it was the New Toei's headquarters who produced the flick (which also accommodated a cinema complex that happened to be playing the Hitler documentary.) BTW the building's still there to this date.
*beep, beep, beep, beep*
Servo: "Set me free why don't ya babe!"
Holy shit I can't believe I found mystery science theater 3000. The original love it
The eyelash mites and the Nana it’s just so funny I love when he says we’re not talking about a fracas....Are we?
you can laugh but my neighbor died of Roji Panty Complex
+thick MclargeHuge That's medically inaccurate - no one dies *of* Roji Panty Complex. They die of *complications associated with* Roji Panty Complex. Victoria's Secret has published a mountain of research on the subject. I've read them all. Twice.
+analogkid01 HAHAHA!!!
And you got the pages stuck together!
It's a silent killer.
+analogkid01 So,..you have been de-briefed on that research.