Actually... I'm the member of a Baptist church ( but I was baptized Catholic ) And I've had 3 funerals at my church, and first was the mass ( or sermon ) Then the psalms, hymns, and the songs ...then the eulogies And the pastor has always had control of the service. I'd like a Hawaiian themed funeral.. BUT after the Mass ( or sermon ) I want a luau, with men in canoes rowing my body into the ocean , setting me on fire, then rowing back to the party on the shore🤣
As someone who is not Catholic and has attended Catholic funerals, I can attest how disorienting the rituals can be. I have attended many and I still run into a few bumps every time so thank you for your grace and patience towards this family.
I was raised catholic and stopped practicing and going to church around the time they changed many of the things that are said during catholic mass. Like when they say "the Lord be with you" we used to say, "and also with you", but they changed it to "and with your spirit" and many other things like that. Whenever a family member dies or gets married, I attend their catholic wedding or funeral, but often say the wrong thing or just feel disoriented by these changes which most catholics are probably used to. I can imagine it's more disorienting if you dont practice the religion. I went to an Episcopal funeral for my partners mother, I was unsure if I could recieve communion since I was an athiest. I asked my partner if I should. He told me that anyone and everyone who can eat can receive communion and that offering communion to everyone who wants it without having them go through a ritual to make them worthy like the catholics do is a very important part of their faith. I thought that was kind of beautiful and even though I didnt believe in Jesus was a divine being who died for us, I ate the wafer.
@Darth Szarych well I mean to be fair to us catholics, we are a rigid faith and have changed countless times throughout history. While we're a welcoming people, it's like a club lol there's some restrictions and rules because we view certain things extremely holy. It's why you'll never hear like rock music or guitars in a catholic setting. These are hundreds of years of tradition. And lol I actually didn't know we havnt always said "with your spirit". I grew up after the change
@@bbgamegodpnw Not to mention I don’t see the difference between the two lines. Why that change would make someone leave the faith is beyond me. I’m certain it’s from already having no faith.
my father grandma's family are very Catholic. But I've noticed that when they died, never appeared a priest to provide them a mass - except my grandma. It was looked like more like a non-christian funeral. There's a problem in Catholic Church that there are priests who distance to much out their congregations... That's awful.
Yes! And it makes me want to share the video with my Liturgical Coordinator so she can cringe at all the bits that I cringed at (I'm a lector by the way so the bits at the Ambo had me laughing out loud.)
After 4 minutes of watching and listening to Fr. Casey's story, when the person who will do the 1st reading, suppose to be from Book of Wisdom then wants to read Psalms.... got that feeling of ....hmmm... stopped the video and started reading the comments... and I found this..... so YES.
Why wasn’t there a commentator to get the ppl to kneel ,sit n stand. I was stressed out jus listening to him relating his account of the service. It sounded like God wanted to play a prank on him that day 😂.I pray God bless him greatly on that day 🙏
As a former Georgia Protestant, I so get the congregation’s cluelessness. And as I current Catholic, I get why you cringed. But I think you did the right thing. And it’s a funny story. Bless you for not totally stressing out 😂.
I too am a Catholic but have had a ghreat deal of experien with Southern people. I was born in the south and a convert to Cathlicism when I agtended a Baptist college. Yo, u need to undrstand that most people in the rural south are not familiar with liturgicai practice. They are Baptisti, Methodist, Church of God, Associate Presbyterian, Snake Handlers, and many oher denominations that a yankee like you have no ideas of. It would have been better to have had a short funeral service followed by a burial and the following Sunday offer Mass for the grandmother when all the congregation could -pray their intention for the repose of the dear lady in eternal rest.
@@paulscott905 I know (sort of) what you mean. My whole family is Catholic, except for my uncle who left the faith, his wife, and their two daughters, who are all Lutheran. I actually thought about my grandma's funeral when Father Casey described the gift bearers. As a cradle Catholic, I really can see why we would think that it should be fairly obvious that the gifts are brought to the priest, but at my grandma's funeral, her five granddaughters (me and my four cousins, including aforementioned Lutheran cousins) were the gift bearers. With three gifts to bring up, and five granddaughters, obviously two of us were just honorary. I can remember my aunt saying that her daughters would be the honorary ones, because Lutherans don't have gift bearers, so neither of them actually knew what their role was. But then one of my Catholic cousins insisted that one of my Lutheran cousins should bring one of the gifts up, so I spent the entire time processing to the sanctuary whispering to her what she was supposed to do, while trying to look like I wasn't whispering... But anyway, my point is, I can definitely understand Father Casey's reaction, and honestly, I'd probably have been the same way except for this experience, but some of this stuff isn't actually intuitive.
As a former Capuchin this has to be the best told church story I have every heard. Saint Francis has a big smile on his face right now. You are a true Franciscan in the true spirit of Saint Francis. Thank you.
I am sure there were catholics among those who came, why didn’t they rise to the occasion n help Fr Casey our. What a sham! And no one thought the mass went so wrong, even the Catholics?!
How do you remain so patient in this scenario? I am, despite not being a catholic or Christian, profoundly moved by your passion, dedication and energy with which you help people in your calling.
I would say that such occasions are part of Father Casey's job. No matter what one's profession is, awkward stressful, and uncomfortable situations arise. As chef Julia Child once said, : "if you can't stand the heat stay out of the kitchen."I would hope the vet father Casey looks back on the experience as a learning experience and get on from there. It will make him a better priest I'm sure.
More like a face-palm. That was embarrassing to listen to. Parishes need to guide and lead people, especially when they are grieving or too overjoyed to think about anything else. As someone who works in a parish office, this story grates on me a lot.
I get it. There was a moment of such absurdity at my grandfather's funeral that, as terrible as it is, myself and several others started laughing hysterically. I was pallbearer, and when we brought the casket in the priest had us stop and leave it still partway in the aisle. This was a pretty small church, so there wasn't much room on either side, but it wasn't so cramped that anyone would think of the aisle as blocked. So when we went up for Communion, people walked by to the right, received the Eucharist, and then turned and walked back on the other side of the casket. It worked fine until my grandmother came up. She was in a wheelchair, and being pushed by my aunt. When she got up there, the wheelchair was too wide to pass. Now, I love my aunt. But she is maybe a little slow mentally. Very kind and loving, but just not the brightest person. So even though it is clear the wheelchair won't fit, she does not back out and go around. Instead, she starts ramming the wheelchair, and my 90 year-old-grandmother, into the side of the casket containing her husband's remains. We were so shocked everyone just stood there for a moment as my aunt rammed the chair against the casket again and again while my poor grandma tried not to fall out. Finally we pallbearers snapped out of our shock and moved in to move the casket a little to the left so the wheelchair could get by. My aunt then wheeled my shaken grandma up to the stunned priest for Communion. After receiving Communion, my aunt (again, love her, but not the sharpest person) turns the wheelchair around and instead of going the long way around, tries to follow everyone else passed the other side of the casket. Which is now even narrower than the first time she tried to get by since we had moved it to the other side. And she doesn't wait for us to move it again; she just starts ramming the wheelchair into the casket. This time even harder. Poor grandma is clinging on for dear life, and several people started cracking up. Knowing I was right behind them and in front of everyone, I tried not to start laughing, but it just kept going until the other pallbearers had received the Eucharist and were available to move the casket again, and by that time I just couldn't keep a straight face. It was like the most inappropriate physical comedy routine I could imagine, and a good number of us who had been crying before now had tears in our eyes from laughing so hard. So not the same as your story in the video, but stuff does happen at funerals.
That’s dangerous. Your aunt is extremely intellectually low on the totem pole. It is never a good idea to be rough with someone elderly, especially not in their 90s. I can’t believe that an adult would ever think that’s such a thing as a good idea or a way to fix the problem Was she like 12 when this happened? I would have been so furious that someone was being so rough with my grandmother.
@TheNotoriousCheeto Oh, your poor Grandma! Yeeps! 😲😱 But that story (minus shaking up Grandma!) HAS to have been the funniest I have ever heard -- in. my. life! I laughed so hard, I cried, then howled. My sides still ache!
I remember what one of my priest told us about his first Baptism he did. When it was time to do the blessing over the Mother he went towards her with his hand up which she thought was for a high 5.
Something very similar happened to my mom's cousin, she was telling me that when she had gone for confession she was more talking to the priest and telling her problems, then when Fr. raised his hand during absolution she without thinking gave him a high five! A few seconds later she realized what she did and was so embarrassed hahaha
Welcome to being a priest in rural Georgia. Go with the flow. As a new priest I once did a funeral and referred to the deceased by the wrong name. How embarrassing! At another funeral the father wanted to open the casket during communion to give the son communion. Quick thinking I told him the deacon would give it to him at the gravesite. After 26 years funerals have always been the highlight. Never boring. God bless. You’re doing great!
Placing the Eucharist in the mouth of the deceased is a superstitious act by people who attempted to imitate the pagan practice of placing a coin in the mouth of the deceased to pay the boatman to cross the River Styx. It comes from a misunderstanding of what Viaticum is, for indeed, that coin was referred to by pagans as viaticum (literally: provisions for the journey).
I have never, ever, ever heard of placing the Eucharist in the mouth of the deceased! As far as I knew, when it occurred out of confusion with Charon's obol, it was only among very early Christian communities....and Bishops were already trying to forbid the mourning from doing that as early as the 300s. Was that ever a tradition among American Catholics? Couldn't that just have been a grieving Georgian father who wasn't catechized enough to know that we don't do that?
I about died laughing at the part the guy comes up AFTER communion to give the first reading. Oh I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time but seriously! ;-)
I give thanks for your gracious presence despite the crumbling of liturgical norms in this celebration and the crumblings to come! My family recently celebrated a Catholic funeral in Salt Lake City, Utah...which was also quite an experience. Despite the lack of knowledge and proper understanding of the liturgy there was also a great amount if respect for our loved one! I thank all Priests who are assisting families who are being blessed by liturgical celebrations that we are sorely unprepared for! What a grace for the family! I hope that in the future we can strive to do much better for our Lord , the King of the Universe, and our loved ones who are making their way to meet him! May God bless your every effort, Father!
Fr. Casey, job well done. One would almost think you'd spent some time in community theatre learning improvisation. And you have the advantage of youth and enthusiasm. I was ordained in the Episcopal Church of Scotland. When officiating at a funeral, I always talk to the family to gather information about the deceased -- fond memories, amusing anecdotes, the impact of faith in their life, etc. My sixth funeral, I was met with totally blank faces, followed by a litany of why the woman was universally disliked. One family member went so far as to tell me they only showed up to confirm she was, indeed, dead. Try to put together a homily or a eulogy with that information. May God give you patience, wisdom, and strength as you travel in the direction God sets out for your ministry. Rev. Brian †
I’m not Catholic but I recognize how things are supposed to be because I sent my son to Catholic school and attended Mass many times. I think you did a wonderful job based on your story. When I find myself in situations like yours I try to remember that God is always with me and everything will work for His good. I also think I can hear Him laughing sometimes.
They weren't very organized but probably had no clue what they were doing "wrong". This helped me realize how laid back my tradition (Baptist) is, there is no "correct" order to a service. And much less of a sense of holiness about the chapel and service. We don't know these things unless we're told. They probably assumed a Catholic funeral was just like a protestant (or non-religious) one where it is basically a memorial service and acted accordingly.
the deceased is dead, That is what she wished for when she was alive. Like he said - Had he been mean to them maybe it would of made their sad day bad for them. It hurts when family die's. She got a Catholic mass. Our Lord was present. an if She was by chance looking on - She was probably laughing at the Father and her family and was quite entertained..
I don't know. I think there is something quite loving and honest about a family of Non-Catholics going "Righto. We called the Catholic Priest. How different can it be?" Incompetent as it was, I once knew a family you completely disrespected the wishes of the deceased and gave them a funeral according to their own religious beliefs. Closest time I've ever seen my Mother come to punching someone is when she learned my militantly atheistic Grandfather (her father in law) was being given an Anglican funeral. And he had been properly *rude* to her about her faith in the past. But you just don't *do* that. Its obscene. She was the one pushing for a fully secular humanist affair, because it didn't matter what she believed, or what she thought, what mattered was respecting the life and beliefs of the deceased. She was incredibly upset by the whole affair. A disorganised shambles by a bunch of incompetent, befuddled and confused Non-Catholics is more respectful than a slick Baptist service, or humanist affair arranged against their wishes by their relatives who think they know better.
Thank you for sharing , as a altar server myself in the Uk you reminded me of what I should do when a visiting priest is exactly that visiting! And to always keep my eye on the priest so that he can rely on me to be able to help, when he isn’t familiar with his surrounding, so thank you xx
I am an altar server as well and we have a visiting priest come sometimes who does things pretty differently than what we're used to (things like where to put things and stuff like that) and usually at the end of Mass he will tell everyone that he's visiting and thanks the altar servers for helping him. He's really nice!!
I’m Sacristan and Head Server at my Parish Church. I never leave an unknown visiting Priest on their own. If needs be I will stand at their side at the altar, point at what and where they need to be reading from, and have even been known to whisper the words in their ear. We had one very old and infirm priest for whom I had to do everything except say the words of institution. I had him to do a burial for us and I had to go to the graveyard with him just in case he fell in the grave he was that rickety! Alas he is now too far gone to be asked to do anything anymore except possibly concelebrate with another priest.
I'm a Catholic convert of 22 years, raised Pentecostal. It can make for some awkward moments. The most embarrassing one was when my priest greeted my sister after a wedding to welcome her and knowing she is Protestant, asked her if she had any questions. She did: "Why don't you people play music we can clap to?" *facepalm*
😂 😂 😂 😂 As one raised Baptist but with many Catholic friends, I attended the funeral of a family friend who was Catholic. My 6'4" rancher uncle & his wife, both Baptists, also attended. They had never been inside a Catholic church, let alone to a Mass. They were following a frail, short older lady down the aisle as my Uncle Ed was gawking at all the statues, etc, as he walked. The lady in front of them got to her pew &, without warning, genuflected before entering her seat. Walking behind them all, I could see what was about to happen but couldn't move fast enough to avoid it! As the lady slowly lowered herself with her old, arthritic knees, my 6ft+ uncle fell over the poor little lady and basically windmilled down the aisle for 4 or 5 pew rows! The little lady was now sitting on the floor & scared to death! I and my aunt helped her up and into her seat while someone ahead of us was holding my uncle's arm & making sure HE was also OK. I then heard my uncle assure the man that he was fine, but loudly asked if the lady had a heart attack & why she "just sat down on the floor like that"! 😂 It was a total embarrassment & my uncle apologized big time after he learned what was going on! The little lady was gracious and invited us to sit in her pew with her. All else went well and now, over 45 years later, I can look back & laugh, and wonder how many times she must've told people about being run over by a giant in church ⛪! 💖
Jesus Christ is God incarnate who came to earth to be born and live a perfect life, a sinless life. (He is one person of the Trinity, consisting of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit; one God in three persons not three Gods.) Jesus then gave Himself up to be crucified and died to pay for the sins of the whole world. My sin, your sin, the sins of everybody. 3 days later He was resurrected. He now offers salvation to all who will turn from their sin and trust Him to save them from eternity in hell. He paid our debts because we couldn't, but we have to trust Him to do it. I cannot add anything to what He has done (not even baptism). I cannot do enough good to take even a year off of my death sentence in hell. The sentence is a never ending one, because I have sinned against an eternal God. But Jesus took my punishment, He saved me, and offers that same salvation to you. I am praying for you.
Casey, this story had me laughing and tears dripping from my eyes (because my family has a mixture of Roman Catholics, Lutherans, Disciples of Christ, and Evangelical Non-Denominational individuals)! I understand how mixtures of faiths could be a challenge for a guest priest, but hey, as my buddy (Father) Patrick said to me decades ago: surprises comes with the job. Fr. Casey: Just 😊 Remember this as a story you will have to tell when you write a memoir of your ministry (which I hope will span many decades).
TheCynedd : As an old-school, educated by full-habit nuns, Roman Catholic, it’s always “Father” first, then his name.......not judging you, just respecting Father. 😇
As an altar boy back in the 1960s, we were given classes off school to attend funerals. Two boys returned looking bedraggled, and when we got the story, it went like this. It had rained heavily for a week and much of the large cemetery was under standing water. The newly dug grave was surrounded by mourners, when the earth began to move. As solemnities were being observed various people started to slide towards the gaping tomb. People clutched other people, and a human chain was the only thing stopping the congregation joining the deceased. The altar servers, being closest, were first in the mud slide. The rest of us thought this hilarious.
I'm from India New Delhi i watch each and every video though it was funeral mass your story telling was hilarious i admire your patience you handled so well i pray for you God bless you fr casey
Yours is the first "Catholic channel" that has shown me a fresher side of the Church and the Franciscan Order. You are doing a great service to your community! Take care!
Another advice: Never start earlier! You never know if somebody is missing. Happened to a friend once. He started earlier and a family member showed up on time and was furios.
As a (Baptist to Catholic) convert I totally get how the family behaved and the frustrations of Father Casey! Oh, lord bless, lol. Glad to hear everything sort of worked out and the family was blessed. Sounds like God’s grace was shown to all and by all. Cool.
When we lived in Cali (Ga. now) we attended a funeral for the son of an old friend of my wife's family. About half in attendance, including the decedents' Mom were, or had been Catholic. The other half were Santeria. They were involved: There were stories revealing intimate details from a woman who shared an annual "date night" with the 7'2" departed. Her husband produced a guitar and gave us a rousing rendition of "I can't help falling in love with you" in full Elvis emulation. The priest soldiered on, his smile and cherub like demeanor never wavering, but I'm certain that at some point that morning he must have asked himself, "what could go wrong?"
As a priest of 41 years I wish I could say this is unusual, it's not. I've learned that as the presider , I can not assume anything. Unless I know the family and the funeral director, I go over everything with the family so there's no possibility of misunderstanding what is going to happen and when it's going to happen. My funeral planning materials review all of this point by point. I get a copy and the family keeps a copy so we are literally on the same page.....and it still goes off but not as badly as it might have. You've got many years ahead of you so you'll collect some more "battle scars" and you're going to have many , many more wonderful experiences. All to the glory of God, the service of his people, and well deserved quiet personal satisfaction. God bless you.
I have been to so many funerals where the majority of the "Catholic" congregation haven't been in a church in years and clearly had no idea how to celebrate Mass, no less the non-Catholics. Our parochial vicar has an excellent way of giving gentle catechesis and instructions through these funeral Masses.
Really appreciate God plopping you in my RUclips feed today! I recently had an event where I thought I had made everything clear and everyone was on the same page, and yet things did not unfold as they should have. In the end, all the attendees were very happy, but I was furious. And I’ve been carrying that anger around with me. Your story gave me great comfort and reminded me that we are all human. And God’s grace still appears through the chaos.
Father Casey, I laughed through your whole recitation, while acknowledging your frustration & confusion too. Chalk this one up as done! Praying for you and your ministry.
Because almost no one in my family is Catholic, I plan to have booklets available at the church door explaining, step by step, how to follow the Requiem Liturgy.
I'm from a Catholic family. Still, my great grandmother chose a sort of "different" priest...he was odd to say the least. He went "off book" and started speaking in detail about decay and worms that would eat away at my great grandfather. My great grandmother was fine with this but my family was appalled. Weve called him the Reverend Worms ever since
I'm a church singer and funerals always have that feeling of "I hope everyone goes well" because you never know what's going to happen. But they are some of the most beautiful services. The gathering of people to support family and friends is what makes churches so important, especially in times of sorrow.
You poor thing. I can't imagine how awkward this funeral must have been. Maybe you could have said (very gently) that this is a Catholic Requiem mass and there is an order that has to be followed. 😂😂😂 A comedy of errors! 🤣🤣
Lynn Cw Yes, a bit of orientation would have really helped. His first mistake was to be too willing to rush things at the beginning. He could have taken the next of kin aside and gotten agreement on the procedure.
As a minister myself, I can empathize and sympathize with you. I've done quite a number of funeral services when the church was full but it felt like there was no congregation, and I was talking to a brick wall. Your conclusion, in the end, was absolutely on the mark.
Reminds me of a comedy television series we had in Australia called "Mother and Son", cherished by many of us over 50. In full admiration I say to you, after many giggles during your story, you're a trooper!! ☺️
I am an Eastern Catholic. Once I went to a wedding just to sing in the choir. The groom's brother was supposed to read the epistle but he chickened out so the priest came to me and asked me to read it. Fortunately I had a few moments to prepare the beforethe liturgy mcgann. I started silently reading "If he has sinned let him confess his sins and the prayers of the church will heal the sick man." I said to the priest "You don't really want me to read this!" and he moved the bookmark from the Sacrament of the Sick to the correct reading for Matrimony.
I remember a strange funeral that I showed up to as a volunteer Emergency Response R.N..for a huge church which held a huge number of people. I volunteered to serve at this week day funeral, at this church, because I had the day off from working in the emergency department. They anticipated a huge turnout for this man's funeral.There were volunteer ushers handing out the funeral programs with the set readings, musical selections: everything in order. There was the musical director of the church, singers, office staff, and this man's pastor there. The funeral started on time with the deceased man's immediately family members all there, as well as many members of the the church (This man's immediate family members belonged to this church. The deceased man served on the church board and in many other volunteer functions at this church, as I was told.) Twenty minutes into the funeral service, this man's six extended family members showed up, entering the church, very loudly, announcing that they were finally here to speak at their family member's funeral. They almost fought with one another, over who was going up first, unannounced, with their sermons or readings, for their brother's, uncle's, and cousin's funeral. They all declared themselves titles, as Evangelist, Missionary, and Prophetess. They all got up, one by one, and took over the funeral completely, although it was clear that the immediate family members were all upset. I guess that the extended family members didn't care. Ushers, the musical director, the singers, and the pastor all stared at each other in disbelief. I heard two give strange sermons, a third read out of Deuteronomy, and the forth, a woman, got up and read the deceased's obituary word by word, from the local newspaper.The last two got up and sang a song together. They all left the church, as soon as they all were through speaking or singing, in front of the church. (They never bothered to give their condolences to the immediate family members.) From my viewpoint, it appeared that these six extended family members were only interested in performing before a captive audience, nothing more. As soon as these six extended family members left, the funeral service started again, where it had left off. No one mentioned what had happened. They figured that the immediate family members had been upset enough , by these extended family members.
Father, this is such a beautiful contemplation on what the Lord has shown you. I truly do think this was a great lesson learned and very important lesson to share!
Great that you flowed with the punches. As a priest I always am respectful of the grieving family and friends. NEVER SHOULD WE PUT RUBRICS OVER PASTORAL COMPASSION. It is their family member's funeral, not ours.
I am a retired Episcopal priest who is one of your subscribers; your funeral story had me practically rolling on the floor laughing and in tears because over 40 years of doing funerals, 'been there, experienced exactly that!" I've known priests who would have become crabby, autocratic and 'laid down the law' which pastorally would be insensitive but you are indeed a true son of St. Francis, Father Casey; you were a good shepherd in that situation: well done good and faithful servant and thanks for giving me a great belly laugh!
I actually spit out my food at one point in was laughing so hard. It was when you said ."Well, at least it was over ...no it wasn't " Hahaha We've all had that day .
Fr. Casey, you always bring ‘humanity’ back reflecting God’s way of reaching all of us in such a way we all can relate, with solace, understanding and yes, humor.
I found this RUclips channel just today. It made my day. Although it's a funeral story, I liked the way father narrated it. This will be a good channel for the youth. Will suggest it to my children
I can so relate. Imagine officiating at your first funeral and having someone stand up and start screaming during the homily. Then imagine the man having to be escorted out of the chapel by the police. Yep. That was my first funeral. The man was struggling with drug addiction and had to be admitted to a treatment facility. In the years since then, he's had a fairly successful recovery from his addictions, thankfully. I will, however, never forget that experience.
HAHA! My uncle used to sit in the back row of the church and if the pastor went long on his sermon, he would hold up his arm with a watch on it and silently, but very visibly, tap his watch as a reminder to the pastor that it was time to wrap up the sermon.
I'm not religious but as someone who gets anxious and frustrated easily when things aren't done "right" I can definitely see how you would have been very put out from all these hiccups!
Father Casey, thank you for sharing your story. From your experience in that day, you bring a very important message to all of us. Through all the inefficiencies of the Funeral Mass, you still did well holding it together. I know how much is needed for preparing a funeral as I've prepared one for my own Mother a few years ago. I can imagine what it must have been like during the funeral Mass you were leading. Thank you Father Casey, for reminding us that God is in control. Comforting to know in God's loving way he's got our backs. God Bless, John
When the service carries meaning and comfort for the congregation but the Liturgy goes wrong, "the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath." This isn't exactly the same context, but there's kernel of truth here. Sometimes we are taught to be patient and do the best we can.
As an adult altar server I understand how rough some funerals can be. I’ve never experienced your situation here but it can often test a priest’s patience during some funerals where he’s a stage director for the funeral. God bless you and your positive outlook Casey.
We had a Latin High Requiem Mass for my mom! People could deal with it or not. My family was tremendously happy. No speakers, just the Priest and Altar Boys, the Choir, etc.
I'm in the Diocese of Tokyo, and local custom here, when getting ready for a ceremony people aren't used to, is to literally WALK the people through the movements and timing of it (in abbreviated form), commenting and explaining all the while using the implements. It is totally strange from an American perspective, but once you've gone through it on several occasions (it doesn't matter whether it's presenting flowers to the mayor after a speech or holding a funeral that is Buddhist or Christian, it's done ALL the time) it makes sense and heads off problems. If things don't go as planned, people generally honor the person more than the plan, but each sticks as best they can to their module. Next time, perhaps..? You did a good job, and served the Lord and the people well that day.
@@kyotoai The problems that can arise are multitudinous. Anybody can come to a funeral, they don't have to be the same denomination much less religion, and they may have been named for a role in the ceremony (that they don't understand), for social reasons outside of the church ceremony. Who stands where, holding what in which hand, what constitutes respectful behavior, what will the ushers give the attendees for the service, what will happen next.. what do they hand to whom, at what timing, when will who speak, who will say what and when, who sits where so that they can come forward as pall bearers, who is on which side of the coffin, will there be any problem with the dry ice in the coffin, how exactly will the coffin be loaded into the hearse, who will go in what order to the crematorium (how many by hired mini-bus, how many by private car), what to do with funeral donations, and thank-yous and therefore should be given the sign-in books when and in what type of container, will copies of it be taken in case of misplacement, etc., etc. Been there, done that a few times.
Reminds me of a time we attended a family friend's funeral and at the mass they had no music prepared. Since my husband and I are always prepared in case we may need to jump in to help, I ran to our car and pulled out my guitar and funeral himnals. Being in the music ministry, this is something we have always vowed to always be prepared for.
"Jesus, I Trust In You"...and in the end, He did NOT let you, or the family down! Father, you are SUCH a breath of fresh air!! Great to see so many young Priests on RUclips sharing their stories and messages! God Bless you!
Hahahahaha! I’m laughing out loud. The receiving of the gifts.... a reading from the book of Wisdom! You poor thing. That must have been awful. I have been at funerals with very few Catholics. I have been in the back of a church where I am the only one standing at the appropriate times and I have been in the front of the church where people stare at me as I am the only one standing. But to have all of those things go wrong, I can’t even imagine! And those 10 Catholics who came up for communion, well I hope that they were regulars and knew how the mass works. Or maybe they were C&E’s who thought wow, things have changed since the last time we were here! 🤣😂 God bless you.
I could listen to you all day long because learning from you is so very loving what you teach in your talk. We are the winners and so appreciate every word.and....try to live it... Thank you Father Casey.
This is so great! Really good story telling! And such a great (and tragic story) ahaha! And I really liked your positive view on it! It would have been so frustrating! But nice and refreshing end! Thankyou! Love your channel!
Father, I’m so touched of how compassionate and understanding you are. The mourned family didn’t understand all that went wrong at the funeral Mass but I’m sure they’ll remember what a wonderful Priest that you are, who celebrated their mom or grandmother’s last Mass on earth. Thanh you Father for being such a wonderful representative of the Catholic faith. May God gives you good health and continues to guide you and walk with you in your journey of Priesthood and thank you for answering your call to serve God and HIS people. My humble respects to you dear Father.🙏🙏🙏😇
Also, Father, you are a gem. Thank you for putting this on the web while we are all in quarantine. Your smile and humor are part of your gift to the people. I’ll be praying for you to continue to serve and take care of yourself.
Wow. Just, wow. I'm not Catholic but spent 10 years going to Mass with my husband. This is, I would not have been able to keep from laughing! You did so good for holding it together!
There’s 2 Catholic Churches in my town and 1 Anglo-Catholic, but I live in a fairly urban area. If you go out to the country, you’ll be lucky to find anything more than Baptist, Methodist, or some other Protestant or cultish group
Oh my God. Thank for giving us such a fresh dedicated young Priest like You . I love to listen to this story and how grãce and patience you display in such situation keep it up good job . Good job 🙏🙏
Great story Father Casey chuckled all the way through not had a lot to laugh about lately as my husband was diagnosed with cancer thank you for sharing and making me smile God works in mysterious ways wonders to perform God bless you and the whole world prayers and greetings from the United Kingdom 🙏🇬🇧❤️🇺🇸
This sounds like my wedding lol. My wife and her family are deep seated Catholics while my family and I are long time baptist from Georgia. It was kinda fun to watch
I listen to this video every couple of months and laugh with my full heart like the first time. I am a full fledged Catholic from a Catholic country in Southeast Europe - Croatia. Many people go to church for weddings and funerals only. People do not know when to sit and stand. The recitals are especially hard at funerals because they are completely different ("may angels bring you to heaven"). Thumbs up for the lesson on grace of God. He is above all our plans and preparations. May God bless you abundandtly in your ministry as a friar and a priest!
You look so young to be a priest, Father! That’s what I like being in Catholic Mass because it is organized, uniformity and in unison. Because I’m disorganized myself.
Fr. Casey, this video is a solid confirmation to me that it's a good thing I never became a priest. I admire your fortitude. And your patience, of which I have little.
As the only Catholic in my largely Southern Baptist family, I imagine this will be my funeral.
😂
You better start inviting them to Mass or get extra friemdly in the Parish
God Bless you!!
Actually...
I'm the member of a Baptist church ( but I was baptized Catholic )
And I've had 3 funerals at my church, and first was the mass ( or sermon )
Then the psalms, hymns, and the songs ...then the eulogies
And the pastor has always had control of the service.
I'd like a Hawaiian themed funeral..
BUT after the Mass ( or sermon )
I want a luau, with men in canoes rowing my body into the ocean , setting me on fire, then rowing back to the party on the shore🤣
I'm considering converting to Catholicism
As someone who is not Catholic and has attended Catholic funerals, I can attest how disorienting the rituals can be. I have attended many and I still run into a few bumps every time so thank you for your grace and patience towards this family.
I was raised catholic and stopped practicing and going to church around the time they changed many of the things that are said during catholic mass. Like when they say "the Lord be with you" we used to say, "and also with you", but they changed it to "and with your spirit" and many other things like that.
Whenever a family member dies or gets married, I attend their catholic wedding or funeral, but often say the wrong thing or just feel disoriented by these changes which most catholics are probably used to.
I can imagine it's more disorienting if you dont practice the religion.
I went to an Episcopal funeral for my partners mother, I was unsure if I could recieve communion since I was an athiest. I asked my partner if I should. He told me that anyone and everyone who can eat can receive communion and that offering communion to everyone who wants it without having them go through a ritual to make them worthy like the catholics do is a very important part of their faith. I thought that was kind of beautiful and even though I didnt believe in Jesus was a divine being who died for us, I ate the wafer.
@@darthszarych5588 , ..
@Darth Szarych well I mean to be fair to us catholics, we are a rigid faith and have changed countless times throughout history. While we're a welcoming people, it's like a club lol there's some restrictions and rules because we view certain things extremely holy. It's why you'll never hear like rock music or guitars in a catholic setting. These are hundreds of years of tradition. And lol I actually didn't know we havnt always said "with your spirit". I grew up after the change
@@bbgamegodpnw Not to mention I don’t see the difference between the two lines. Why that change would make someone leave the faith is beyond me. I’m certain it’s from already having no faith.
They didn't leave because of those changes, that person didn't say that. @@Duckcalculator
The pastor wasn't gone...
He knew what was coming and was hiding in the rectory.
Hahahahahahahaa
I bet he was...
😂😂😂😂😂
my father grandma's family are very Catholic. But I've noticed that when they died, never appeared a priest to provide them a mass - except my grandma. It was looked like more like a non-christian funeral. There's a problem in Catholic Church that there are priests who distance to much out their congregations... That's awful.
isn't that the truth!!
did anyone else have anxiety listening to this?? i was on the edge of my seat thinking of what could go wrong next
Personally I appreciate that he tried so hard to get things on track. But failed to do so.
Yes! And it makes me want to share the video with my Liturgical Coordinator so she can cringe at all the bits that I cringed at (I'm a lector by the way so the bits at the Ambo had me laughing out loud.)
After 4 minutes of watching and listening to Fr. Casey's story, when the person who will do the 1st reading, suppose to be from Book of Wisdom then wants to read Psalms.... got that feeling of ....hmmm... stopped the video and started reading the comments... and I found this..... so YES.
Totally
Why wasn’t there a commentator to get the ppl to kneel ,sit n stand. I was stressed out jus listening to him relating his account of the service. It sounded like God wanted to play a prank on him that day 😂.I pray God bless him greatly on that day 🙏
As a former Georgia Protestant, I so get the congregation’s cluelessness. And as I current Catholic, I get why you cringed. But I think you did the right thing. And it’s a funny story. Bless you for not totally stressing out 😂.
I too am a Catholic but have had a ghreat deal of experien with Southern people. I was born in the south and a convert to Cathlicism when I agtended a Baptist college. Yo, u need to undrstand that most people in the rural south are not familiar with liturgicai practice. They are Baptisti, Methodist, Church of God, Associate Presbyterian, Snake Handlers, and many oher denominations that a yankee like you have no ideas of. It would have been better to have had a short funeral service followed by a burial and the following Sunday offer Mass for the grandmother when all the congregation could -pray their intention for the repose of the dear lady in eternal rest.
@@paulscott905 That's not what the family wanted.
@@paulscott905 funniest commentary ever. "Snake Handlers" hahaha
Welcome Home! :)
@@paulscott905 I know (sort of) what you mean. My whole family is Catholic, except for my uncle who left the faith, his wife, and their two daughters, who are all Lutheran. I actually thought about my grandma's funeral when Father Casey described the gift bearers. As a cradle Catholic, I really can see why we would think that it should be fairly obvious that the gifts are brought to the priest, but at my grandma's funeral, her five granddaughters (me and my four cousins, including aforementioned Lutheran cousins) were the gift bearers. With three gifts to bring up, and five granddaughters, obviously two of us were just honorary. I can remember my aunt saying that her daughters would be the honorary ones, because Lutherans don't have gift bearers, so neither of them actually knew what their role was.
But then one of my Catholic cousins insisted that one of my Lutheran cousins should bring one of the gifts up, so I spent the entire time processing to the sanctuary whispering to her what she was supposed to do, while trying to look like I wasn't whispering...
But anyway, my point is, I can definitely understand Father Casey's reaction, and honestly, I'd probably have been the same way except for this experience, but some of this stuff isn't actually intuitive.
As a former Capuchin this has to be the best told church story I have every heard. Saint Francis has a big smile on his face right now. You are a true Franciscan in the true spirit of Saint Francis. Thank you.
“Funerals are super easy!” Famous last words 😂
especially if its your own
😂
From this point on the first question, before mass, “Are there any Catholics here today.”
hahaha
Lmao
a very good question.
😂
If no one knew what they were doing, no one knew what went wrong.
True but also no one knew what a Catholic Mass was either following that circus. If anything goes, then anything goes.
True LOL 😂
👍🏻😁
Exactly how very sad not to know Christ
I am sure there were catholics among those who came, why didn’t they rise to the occasion n help Fr Casey our. What a sham! And no one thought the mass went so wrong, even the Catholics?!
How do you remain so patient in this scenario? I am, despite not being a catholic or Christian, profoundly moved by your passion, dedication and energy with which you help people in your calling.
I would say that such occasions are part of Father Casey's job. No matter what one's profession is, awkward stressful, and uncomfortable situations arise. As chef Julia Child once said, : "if you can't stand the heat stay out of the kitchen."I would hope the vet father Casey looks back on the experience as a learning experience and get on from there. It will make him a better priest I'm sure.
Because he has the Holy Spirit with him, that's how.
Fr. Casey, in such situations I imagine God chuckling to himself as He blesses the whole thing.👍👍👍
More like a face-palm. That was embarrassing to listen to. Parishes need to guide and lead people, especially when they are grieving or too overjoyed to think about anything else. As someone who works in a parish office, this story grates on me a lot.
@@holytrinitycatholicyouthof7543 Why do you feel that way? Could you have done it any better if you were in his shoes?
Yeah, I believe He did...
God has the greatest sense of humour.
Omg LOL 😂
I get it. There was a moment of such absurdity at my grandfather's funeral that, as terrible as it is, myself and several others started laughing hysterically.
I was pallbearer, and when we brought the casket in the priest had us stop and leave it still partway in the aisle. This was a pretty small church, so there wasn't much room on either side, but it wasn't so cramped that anyone would think of the aisle as blocked. So when we went up for Communion, people walked by to the right, received the Eucharist, and then turned and walked back on the other side of the casket.
It worked fine until my grandmother came up. She was in a wheelchair, and being pushed by my aunt. When she got up there, the wheelchair was too wide to pass.
Now, I love my aunt. But she is maybe a little slow mentally. Very kind and loving, but just not the brightest person. So even though it is clear the wheelchair won't fit, she does not back out and go around. Instead, she starts ramming the wheelchair, and my 90 year-old-grandmother, into the side of the casket containing her husband's remains. We were so shocked everyone just stood there for a moment as my aunt rammed the chair against the casket again and again while my poor grandma tried not to fall out. Finally we pallbearers snapped out of our shock and moved in to move the casket a little to the left so the wheelchair could get by. My aunt then wheeled my shaken grandma up to the stunned priest for Communion.
After receiving Communion, my aunt (again, love her, but not the sharpest person) turns the wheelchair around and instead of going the long way around, tries to follow everyone else passed the other side of the casket. Which is now even narrower than the first time she tried to get by since we had moved it to the other side. And she doesn't wait for us to move it again; she just starts ramming the wheelchair into the casket. This time even harder. Poor grandma is clinging on for dear life, and several people started cracking up. Knowing I was right behind them and in front of everyone, I tried not to start laughing, but it just kept going until the other pallbearers had received the Eucharist and were available to move the casket again, and by that time I just couldn't keep a straight face. It was like the most inappropriate physical comedy routine I could imagine, and a good number of us who had been crying before now had tears in our eyes from laughing so hard.
So not the same as your story in the video, but stuff does happen at funerals.
That’s dangerous. Your aunt is extremely intellectually low on the totem pole.
It is never a good idea to be rough with someone elderly, especially not in their 90s.
I can’t believe that an adult would ever think that’s such a thing as a good idea or a way to fix the problem
Was she like 12 when this happened? I would have been so furious that someone was being so rough with my grandmother.
@TheNotoriousCheeto
Oh, your poor Grandma! Yeeps! 😲😱
But that story (minus shaking up Grandma!) HAS to have been the funniest I have ever heard -- in. my. life! I laughed so hard, I cried, then howled. My sides still ache!
This reads like something out of a 90s comedy movie
I remember what one of my priest told us about his first Baptism he did. When it was time to do the blessing over the Mother he went towards her with his hand up which she thought was for a high 5.
That's hilarious!
Something very similar happened to my mom's cousin, she was telling me that when she had gone for confession she was more talking to the priest and telling her problems, then when Fr. raised his hand during absolution she without thinking gave him a high five! A few seconds later she realized what she did and was so embarrassed hahaha
🤣🤣🤣
🤣
😂
Welcome to being a priest in rural Georgia. Go with the flow. As a new priest I once did a funeral and referred to the deceased by the wrong name. How embarrassing! At another funeral the father wanted to open the casket during communion to give the son communion. Quick thinking I told him the deacon would give it to him at the gravesite. After 26 years funerals have always been the highlight. Never boring. God bless. You’re doing great!
Placing the Eucharist in the mouth of the deceased is a superstitious act by people who attempted to imitate the pagan practice of placing a coin in the mouth of the deceased to pay the boatman to cross the River Styx. It comes from a misunderstanding of what Viaticum is, for indeed, that coin was referred to by pagans as viaticum (literally: provisions for the journey).
Thanks for the insight. I can only say at the moment it certainly threw me off. Expect the unexpected.
😀😀
I have never, ever, ever heard of placing the Eucharist in the mouth of the deceased! As far as I knew, when it occurred out of confusion with Charon's obol, it was only among very early Christian communities....and Bishops were already trying to forbid the mourning from doing that as early as the 300s.
Was that ever a tradition among American Catholics?
Couldn't that just have been a grieving Georgian father who wasn't catechized enough to know that we don't do that?
@@melissasaint3283 That's what I thought. A sad story. His son.
Now you know why the other preist wasn't available lol
😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣
No kidding. That priest owes Fr. Casey a massive favor.
If I were FR. Casey, that would be the first priest I would call for a last minute favor.
My thought exactly xD
I about died laughing at the part the guy comes up AFTER communion to give the first reading. Oh I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time but seriously! ;-)
Putting the "Fun" back into "Funerals"!
Hahaha
Love it! 😂
😂😂😂 I remember the above line from an episode of Night Court. 😂
Oh My Lord....
I give thanks for your gracious presence despite the crumbling of liturgical norms in this celebration and the crumblings to come! My family recently celebrated a Catholic funeral in Salt Lake City, Utah...which was also quite an experience. Despite the lack of knowledge and proper understanding of the liturgy there was also a great amount if respect for our loved one! I thank all Priests who are assisting families who are being blessed by liturgical celebrations that we are sorely unprepared for! What a grace for the family!
I hope that in the future we can strive to do much better for our Lord , the King of the Universe, and our loved ones who are making their way to meet him! May God bless your every effort, Father!
Fr. Casey, job well done. One would almost think you'd spent some time in community theatre learning improvisation. And you have the advantage of youth and enthusiasm. I was ordained in the Episcopal Church of Scotland. When officiating at a funeral, I always talk to the family to gather information about the deceased -- fond memories, amusing anecdotes, the impact of faith in their life, etc. My sixth funeral, I was met with totally blank faces, followed by a litany of why the woman was universally disliked. One family member went so far as to tell me they only showed up to confirm she was, indeed, dead. Try to put together a homily or a eulogy with that information. May God give you patience, wisdom, and strength as you travel in the direction God sets out for your ministry.
Rev. Brian †
Hearing a terrible mass from a priests perspective is so funny
he never said a terrible mass ... kindly speak with facts ...
@@eliasreddykasu9389 my apologies but you know my comment was made in good faith
Elias, read the title “Worst”....
Only in novus ordo
@@yvona7645 judge much?
I’m not Catholic but I recognize how things are supposed to be because I sent my son to Catholic school and attended Mass many times. I think you did a wonderful job based on your story. When I find myself in situations like yours I try to remember that God is always with me and everything will work for His good. I also think I can hear Him laughing sometimes.
You certainly evoke "suffering servant". God bless you for your kindnesses!
Kinda rude to the deceased. Not you, but the people attending. The deceased wanted a Catholic funeral and should have gotten a proper one.
They weren't very organized but probably had no clue what they were doing "wrong". This helped me realize how laid back my tradition (Baptist) is, there is no "correct" order to a service. And much less of a sense of holiness about the chapel and service. We don't know these things unless we're told. They probably assumed a Catholic funeral was just like a protestant (or non-religious) one where it is basically a memorial service and acted accordingly.
the deceased is dead, That is what she wished for when she was alive. Like he said - Had he been mean to them maybe it would of made their sad day bad for them. It hurts when family die's. She got a Catholic mass. Our Lord was present. an if She was by chance looking on - She was probably laughing at the Father and her family and was quite entertained..
@@WandaCasamento59 I'd be laughing, for sure! 😂
I'd come back to haunt them. 🙂
I don't know. I think there is something quite loving and honest about a family of Non-Catholics going "Righto. We called the Catholic Priest. How different can it be?"
Incompetent as it was, I once knew a family you completely disrespected the wishes of the deceased and gave them a funeral according to their own religious beliefs.
Closest time I've ever seen my Mother come to punching someone is when she learned my militantly atheistic Grandfather (her father in law) was being given an Anglican funeral. And he had been properly *rude* to her about her faith in the past. But you just don't *do* that. Its obscene. She was the one pushing for a fully secular humanist affair, because it didn't matter what she believed, or what she thought, what mattered was respecting the life and beliefs of the deceased. She was incredibly upset by the whole affair.
A disorganised shambles by a bunch of incompetent, befuddled and confused Non-Catholics is more respectful than a slick Baptist service, or humanist affair arranged against their wishes by their relatives who think they know better.
Thank you for sharing , as a altar server myself in the Uk you reminded me of what I should do when a visiting priest is exactly that visiting! And to always keep my eye on the priest so that he can rely on me to be able to help, when he isn’t familiar with his surrounding, so thank you xx
Altar Server Gang
Im an altar server too and i agree that we always keep an eye for the priest if he needs something or tells something.
I am an altar server as well and we have a visiting priest come sometimes who does things pretty differently than what we're used to (things like where to put things and stuff like that) and usually at the end of Mass he will tell everyone that he's visiting and thanks the altar servers for helping him. He's really nice!!
So thoughtful
I’m Sacristan and Head Server at my Parish Church. I never leave an unknown visiting Priest on their own. If needs be I will stand at their side at the altar, point at what and where they need to be reading from, and have even been known to whisper the words in their ear. We had one very old and infirm priest for whom I had to do everything except say the words of institution. I had him to do a burial for us and I had to go to the graveyard with him just in case he fell in the grave he was that rickety! Alas he is now too far gone to be asked to do anything anymore except possibly concelebrate with another priest.
I'm a Catholic convert of 22 years, raised Pentecostal. It can make for some awkward moments. The most embarrassing one was when my priest greeted my sister after a wedding to welcome her and knowing she is Protestant, asked her if she had any questions. She did: "Why don't you people play music we can clap to?" *facepalm*
😂 😂 😂 😂 As one raised Baptist but with many Catholic friends, I attended the funeral of a family friend who was Catholic. My 6'4" rancher uncle & his wife, both Baptists, also attended. They had never been inside a Catholic church, let alone to a Mass. They were following a frail, short older lady down the aisle as my Uncle Ed was gawking at all the statues, etc, as he walked. The lady in front of them got to her pew &, without warning, genuflected before entering her seat. Walking behind them all, I could see what was about to happen but couldn't move fast enough to avoid it! As the lady slowly lowered herself with her old, arthritic knees, my 6ft+ uncle fell over the poor little lady and basically windmilled down the aisle for 4 or 5 pew rows! The little lady was now sitting on the floor & scared to death! I and my aunt helped her up and into her seat while someone ahead of us was holding my uncle's arm & making sure HE was also OK. I then heard my uncle assure the man that he was fine, but loudly asked if the lady had a heart attack & why she "just sat down on the floor like that"! 😂 It was a total embarrassment & my uncle apologized big time after he learned what was going on! The little lady was gracious and invited us to sit in her pew with her. All else went well and now, over 45 years later, I can look back & laugh, and wonder how many times she must've told people about being run over by a giant in church ⛪! 💖
@@shilohauraable hahahahahaha - What a fantastic story
Oh that is too funny. hahahahhaha Great story
Jesus Christ is God incarnate who came to earth to be born and live a perfect life, a sinless life. (He is one person of the Trinity, consisting of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit; one God in three persons not three Gods.) Jesus then gave Himself up to be crucified and died to pay for the sins of the whole world. My sin, your sin, the sins of everybody. 3 days later He was resurrected. He now offers salvation to all who will turn from their sin and trust Him to save them from eternity in hell. He paid our debts because we couldn't, but we have to trust Him to do it. I cannot add anything to what He has done (not even baptism). I cannot do enough good to take even a year off of my death sentence in hell. The sentence is a never ending one, because I have sinned against an eternal God. But Jesus took my punishment, He saved me, and offers that same salvation to you. I am praying for you.
@@shilohauraable I was laughing so hard my mom kept getting spooked 🤣🤣🤣
Casey, this story had me laughing and tears dripping from my eyes (because my family has a mixture of Roman Catholics, Lutherans, Disciples of Christ, and Evangelical Non-Denominational individuals)! I understand how mixtures of faiths could be a challenge for a guest priest, but hey, as my buddy (Father) Patrick said to me decades ago: surprises comes with the job.
Fr. Casey: Just 😊 Remember this as a story you will have to tell when you write a memoir of your ministry (which I hope will span many decades).
TheCynedd : As an old-school, educated by full-habit nuns, Roman Catholic, it’s always “Father” first, then his name.......not judging you, just respecting Father. 😇
As an altar boy back in the 1960s, we were given classes off school to attend funerals. Two boys returned looking bedraggled, and when we got the story, it went like this. It had rained heavily for a week and much of the large cemetery was under standing water. The newly dug grave was surrounded by mourners, when the earth began to move. As solemnities were being observed various people started to slide towards the gaping tomb. People clutched other people, and a human chain was the only thing stopping the congregation joining the deceased. The altar servers, being closest, were first in the mud slide. The rest of us thought this hilarious.
Well that would certainly make for an interesting short horror story
I'm from India New Delhi i watch each and every video though it was funeral mass your story telling was hilarious i admire your patience you handled so well i pray for you God bless you fr casey
I will pray for you 😇😇😇
Yours is the first "Catholic channel" that has shown me a fresher side of the Church and the Franciscan Order. You are doing a great service to your community! Take care!
Another advice: Never start earlier!
You never know if somebody is missing. Happened to a friend once. He started earlier and a family member showed up on time and was furios.
I have a cousin whose a funeral director. He learned quickly to always have a program for all funerals, regardless of religion.
As a (Baptist to Catholic) convert I totally get how the family behaved and the frustrations of Father Casey! Oh, lord bless, lol. Glad to hear everything sort of worked out and the family was blessed. Sounds like God’s grace was shown to all and by all. Cool.
@Melissa I'm a former Baptist who entered the Roman Catholic Church named Melissa too! ❤🙏🏾
When we lived in Cali (Ga. now) we attended a funeral for the son of an old friend of my wife's family. About half in attendance, including the decedents' Mom were, or had been Catholic. The other half were Santeria.
They were involved:
There were stories revealing intimate details from a woman who shared an annual "date night" with the 7'2" departed. Her husband produced a guitar and gave us a rousing rendition of "I can't help falling in love with you" in full Elvis emulation. The priest soldiered on, his smile and cherub like demeanor never wavering, but I'm certain that at some point that morning he must have asked himself, "what could go wrong?"
Somebody once said to me, "if God exists he must have a weird sense of humour." This story has prompted my understanding of that statement.
"It's not up to me how His grace is given" LOVE!!
As a priest of 41 years I wish I could say this is unusual, it's not. I've learned that as the presider , I can not assume anything. Unless I know the family and the funeral director, I go over everything with the family so there's no possibility of misunderstanding what is going to happen and when it's going to happen. My funeral planning materials review all of this point by point. I get a copy and the family keeps a copy so we are literally on the same page.....and it still goes off but not as badly as it might have. You've got many years ahead of you so you'll collect some more "battle scars" and you're going to have many , many more wonderful experiences. All to the glory of God, the service of his people, and well deserved quiet personal satisfaction. God bless you.
I'm 41 now
@@MeadeSkeltonMusic if you were baptized in Pittsburgh, I could have baptized you.....now I feel old 🥺😂
I have been to so many funerals where the majority of the "Catholic" congregation haven't been in a church in years and clearly had no idea how to celebrate Mass, no less the non-Catholics. Our parochial vicar has an excellent way of giving gentle catechesis and instructions through these funeral Masses.
What is it ?
I'm thinking a man of the cloth _has to_ develop such a technique, after one or two experiences like this.
Really appreciate God plopping you in my RUclips feed today! I recently had an event where I thought I had made everything clear and everyone was on the same page, and yet things did not unfold as they should have. In the end, all the attendees were very happy, but I was furious. And I’ve been carrying that anger around with me. Your story gave me great comfort and reminded me that we are all human. And God’s grace still appears through the chaos.
Father Casey, I laughed through your whole recitation, while acknowledging your frustration & confusion too. Chalk this one up as done! Praying for you and your ministry.
Because almost no one in my family is Catholic, I plan to have booklets available at the church door explaining, step by step, how to follow the Requiem Liturgy.
Also start making buddies in Church
Why force the non-Catholics to attend a mass at all?
@@robertawalsh2995 dont force em mate, invite em.
@@robertawalsh2995 he’s not forcing them to attend mass, he wants them to know the protocol in case he dies so the funeral is good
Great idea
I'm from a Catholic family. Still, my great grandmother chose a sort of "different" priest...he was odd to say the least. He went "off book" and started speaking in detail about decay and worms that would eat away at my great grandfather. My great grandmother was fine with this but my family was appalled. Weve called him the Reverend Worms ever since
☠️☠️☠️
Oh well red flag was he was a reverend 😆 the weirdest things I've seen are from them lol haha
I'm a church singer and funerals always have that feeling of "I hope everyone goes well" because you never know what's going to happen. But they are some of the most beautiful services. The gathering of people to support family and friends is what makes churches so important, especially in times of sorrow.
You poor thing. I can't imagine how awkward this funeral must have been. Maybe you could have said (very gently) that this is a Catholic Requiem mass and there is an order that has to be followed. 😂😂😂 A comedy of errors! 🤣🤣
Lynn Cw Yes, a bit of orientation would have really helped. His first mistake was to be too willing to rush things at the beginning. He could have taken the next of kin aside and gotten agreement on the procedure.
See? This is why I’m NOT having a funeral! God can do whatever He wants with no funeral!
As a minister myself, I can empathize and sympathize with you. I've done quite a number of funeral services when the church was full but it felt like there was no congregation, and I was talking to a brick wall. Your conclusion, in the end, was absolutely on the mark.
Reminds me of a comedy television series we had in Australia called "Mother and Son", cherished by many of us over 50. In full admiration I say to you, after many giggles during your story, you're a trooper!! ☺️
I am an Eastern Catholic. Once I went to a wedding just to sing in the choir. The groom's brother was supposed to read the epistle but he chickened out so the priest came to me and asked me to read it. Fortunately I had a few moments to prepare the beforethe liturgy mcgann. I started silently reading "If he has sinned let him confess his sins and the prayers of the church will heal the sick man." I said to the priest "You don't really want me to read this!" and he moved the bookmark from the Sacrament of the Sick to the correct reading for Matrimony.
Oh man I can almost hear the internal screaming! XD Good job holding yourself together!
I was so stressed just listening to this. Happy it all worked out. God is always in control and with us.
I remember a strange funeral that I showed up to as a volunteer Emergency Response R.N..for a huge church which held a huge number of people. I volunteered to serve at this week day funeral, at this church, because I had the day off from working in the emergency department. They anticipated a huge turnout for this man's funeral.There were volunteer ushers handing out the funeral programs with the set readings, musical selections: everything in order. There was the musical director of the church, singers, office staff, and this man's pastor there. The funeral started on time with the deceased man's immediately family members all there, as well as many members of the the church (This man's immediate family members belonged to this church. The deceased man served on the church board and in many other volunteer functions at this church, as I was told.)
Twenty minutes into the funeral service, this man's six extended family members showed up, entering the church, very loudly, announcing that they were finally here to speak at their family member's funeral. They almost fought with one another, over who was going up first, unannounced, with their sermons or readings, for their brother's, uncle's, and cousin's funeral. They all declared themselves titles, as Evangelist, Missionary, and Prophetess. They all got up, one by one, and took over the funeral completely, although it was clear that the immediate family members were all upset. I guess that the extended family members didn't care. Ushers, the musical director, the singers, and the pastor all stared at each other in disbelief. I heard two give strange sermons, a third read out of Deuteronomy, and the forth, a woman, got up and read the deceased's obituary word by word, from the local newspaper.The last two got up and sang a song together. They all left the church, as soon as they all were through speaking or singing, in front of the church. (They never bothered to give their condolences to the immediate family members.) From my viewpoint, it appeared that these six extended family members were only interested in performing before a captive audience, nothing more. As soon as these six extended family members left, the funeral service started again, where it had left off. No one mentioned what had happened. They figured that the immediate family members had been upset enough , by these extended family members.
What is funny is that as you're telling the story you actually shows us how you reacted when things were getting out of control 😂😂
Father, this is such a beautiful contemplation on what the Lord has shown you. I truly do think this was a great lesson learned and very important lesson to share!
Great that you flowed with the punches. As a priest I always am respectful of the grieving family and friends. NEVER SHOULD WE PUT RUBRICS OVER PASTORAL COMPASSION. It is their family member's funeral, not ours.
NO MATHER HOW AWKWARD IT IS I COULD SAY THAT YOU REALLY DID A GOOD JOB.
I am a retired Episcopal priest who is one of your subscribers; your funeral story had me practically rolling on the floor laughing and in tears because over 40 years of doing funerals, 'been there, experienced exactly that!" I've known priests who would have become crabby, autocratic and 'laid down the law' which pastorally would be insensitive but you are indeed a true son of St. Francis, Father Casey; you were a good shepherd in that situation: well done good and faithful servant and thanks for giving me a great belly laugh!
I actually spit out my food at one point in was laughing so hard. It was when you said ."Well, at least it was over ...no it wasn't " Hahaha
We've all had that day .
Fr. I LOVE YOU! KNOW THAT WE UNDERSTAND. I am a nurse seeing families AT THEIR WORST. God makes me humble. Your the best!
Great story! So "funerals are super easy" was your "it's smoooooth sailing from here".
"Funerals are so easy" is a very odd and trivializing thing for this priest to say! Not so "easy" for the family!
@@jm08050 The liturgy is easy, with a few extra prayers, as he said.
Fr. Casey, you always bring ‘humanity’ back reflecting God’s way of reaching all of us in such a way we all can relate, with solace, understanding and yes, humor.
Haha! I love how you thought you were "sort of in control".
I call this “Adventures in Liturgy”.
Thank you Father for being an inspiration in my vocation. Patience is really a virtue in your pastoral ministry. Its such a religious experience.
I found this RUclips channel just today. It made my day. Although it's a funeral story, I liked the way father narrated it. This will be a good channel for the youth. Will suggest it to my children
I can so relate. Imagine officiating at your first funeral and having someone stand up and start screaming during the homily. Then imagine the man having to be escorted out of the chapel by the police. Yep. That was my first funeral. The man was struggling with drug addiction and had to be admitted to a treatment facility. In the years since then, he's had a fairly successful recovery from his addictions, thankfully. I will, however, never forget that experience.
HAHA! My uncle used to sit in the back row of the church and if the pastor went long on his sermon, he would hold up his arm with a watch on it and silently, but very visibly, tap his watch as a reminder to the pastor that it was time to wrap up the sermon.
As a traditionalist Catholic, this was painful to watch. But St. Francis is looking down kindly at your humbleness
...and chuckling.
I'm not religious but as someone who gets anxious and frustrated easily when things aren't done "right" I can definitely see how you would have been very put out from all these hiccups!
Father Casey, thank you for sharing your story. From your experience in that day, you bring a very important message to all of us. Through all the inefficiencies of the Funeral Mass, you still did well holding it together. I know how much is needed for preparing a funeral as I've prepared one for my own Mother a few years ago. I can imagine what it must have been like during the funeral Mass you were leading.
Thank you Father Casey, for reminding us that God is in control. Comforting to know in God's loving way he's got our backs.
God Bless,
John
When the service carries meaning and comfort for the congregation but the Liturgy goes wrong, "the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath." This isn't exactly the same context, but there's kernel of truth here. Sometimes we are taught to be patient and do the best we can.
As an adult altar server I understand how rough some funerals can be. I’ve never experienced your situation here but it can often test a priest’s patience during some funerals where he’s a stage director for the funeral. God bless you and your positive outlook Casey.
Half Way Through My Mom Goes: "Oh, That Poor Man!"
We had a Latin High Requiem Mass for my mom! People could deal with it or not. My family was tremendously happy. No speakers, just the Priest and Altar Boys, the Choir, etc.
The final message was really beautiful. God bless you Fr. Casey!
I'm in the Diocese of Tokyo, and local custom here, when getting ready for a ceremony people aren't used to, is to literally WALK the people through the movements and timing of it (in abbreviated form), commenting and explaining all the while using the implements. It is totally strange from an American perspective, but once you've gone through it on several occasions (it doesn't matter whether it's presenting flowers to the mayor after a speech or holding a funeral that is Buddhist or Christian, it's done ALL the time) it makes sense and heads off problems. If things don't go as planned, people generally honor the person more than the plan, but each sticks as best they can to their module. Next time, perhaps..? You did a good job, and served the Lord and the people well that day.
Meg Nakano j
Although if they couldn't handle a simple instruction like "we will do the eulogies after communion", how much could you really walk them through?
@@kyotoai The problems that can arise are multitudinous. Anybody can come to a funeral, they don't have to be the same denomination much less religion, and they may have been named for a role in the ceremony (that they don't understand), for social reasons outside of the church ceremony. Who stands where, holding what in which hand, what constitutes respectful behavior, what will the ushers give the attendees for the service, what will happen next.. what do they hand to whom, at what timing, when will who speak, who will say what and when, who sits where so that they can come forward as pall bearers, who is on which side of the coffin, will there be any problem with the dry ice in the coffin, how exactly will the coffin be loaded into the hearse, who will go in what order to the crematorium (how many by hired mini-bus, how many by private car), what to do with funeral donations, and thank-yous and therefore should be given the sign-in books when and in what type of container, will copies of it be taken in case of misplacement, etc., etc. Been there, done that a few times.
I laughed so much! 😂 beautiful insights at the end as always though.
Reminds me of a time we attended a family friend's funeral and at the mass they had no music prepared. Since my husband and I are always prepared in case we may need to jump in to help, I ran to our car and pulled out my guitar and funeral himnals. Being in the music ministry, this is something we have always vowed to always be prepared for.
I have laughed out my ribs watching this.. I can imagine how you felt while on the altar
I live in Georgia, so I know exactly what you went through! 😂 I'm a Cantor and have sung hundreds of funerals, and seen some funny and crazy things!
"I was good on penance for awhile" 😭😂
"Jesus, I Trust In You"...and in the end, He did NOT let you, or the family down! Father, you are SUCH a breath of fresh air!! Great to see so many young Priests on RUclips sharing their stories and messages! God Bless you!
Hahahahaha! I’m laughing out loud. The receiving of the gifts.... a reading from the book of Wisdom! You poor thing. That must have been awful. I have been at funerals with very few Catholics. I have been in the back of a church where I am the only one standing at the appropriate times and I have been in the front of the church where people stare at me as I am the only one standing. But to have all of those things go wrong, I can’t even imagine! And those 10 Catholics who came up for communion, well I hope that they were regulars and knew how the mass works. Or maybe they were C&E’s who thought wow, things have changed since the last time we were here! 🤣😂 God bless you.
I could listen to you all day long because learning from you is so very loving what you teach in your talk.
We are the winners and so appreciate every word.and....try to live it...
Thank you Father Casey.
"our prayer and worship serves our need, and not the other way around"
amen
Worship is for God, you us.
That is so funny! I'll bet the deceased lady was watching and laughing from heaven at it all. I love It that you are so open-minded.
This is so great! Really good story telling! And such a great (and tragic story) ahaha! And I really liked your positive view on it! It would have been so frustrating! But nice and refreshing end! Thankyou! Love your channel!
Father, I’m so touched of how compassionate and understanding you are. The mourned family didn’t understand all that went wrong at the funeral Mass but I’m sure they’ll remember what a wonderful Priest that you are, who celebrated their mom or grandmother’s last Mass on earth. Thanh you Father for being such a wonderful representative of the Catholic faith. May God gives you good health and continues to guide you and walk with you in your journey of Priesthood and thank you for answering your call to serve God and HIS people. My humble respects to you dear Father.🙏🙏🙏😇
You had narrated it very well, I can see your situation my head, in detail. Haha.
Also, Father, you are a gem. Thank you for putting this on the web while we are all in quarantine. Your smile and humor are part of your gift to the people. I’ll be praying for you to continue to serve and take care of yourself.
I was half expecting Fr. Casey to say; ''...and then the Bishop walked to see how well the funerals were going...''
This is absolutely hysterical !!! Thank you so very much for sharing.
Father, seriously... you have motivated me to start reading the good book. I decided to start New Testament and made a good start in Matthew.
Wow. Just, wow. I'm not Catholic but spent 10 years going to Mass with my husband. This is, I would not have been able to keep from laughing! You did so good for holding it together!
Georgia summers are highly punishing. You don’t find many Catholics in the rural areas, or really liturgical churches.
Hmm... Are there anymore catholics?
There’s 2 Catholic Churches in my town and 1 Anglo-Catholic, but I live in a fairly urban area. If you go out to the country, you’ll be lucky to find anything more than Baptist, Methodist, or some other Protestant or cultish group
Oh my God. Thank for giving us such a fresh dedicated young Priest like You . I love to listen to this story and how grãce and patience you display in such situation keep it up good job . Good job 🙏🙏
"What could go wrong?" .... Ha! All of this sounds like it belongs in a movie, not in real life. At least you can laugh about it now that it's over!
Great story Father Casey chuckled all the way through not had a lot to laugh about lately as my husband was diagnosed with cancer thank you for sharing and making me smile God works in mysterious ways wonders to perform God bless you and the whole world prayers and greetings from the United Kingdom 🙏🇬🇧❤️🇺🇸
This sounds like my wedding lol. My wife and her family are deep seated Catholics while my family and I are long time baptist from Georgia. It was kinda fun to watch
I listen to this video every couple of months and laugh with my full heart like the first time. I am a full fledged Catholic from a Catholic country in Southeast Europe - Croatia. Many people go to church for weddings and funerals only. People do not know when to sit and stand. The recitals are especially hard at funerals because they are completely different ("may angels bring you to heaven"). Thumbs up for the lesson on grace of God. He is above all our plans and preparations. May God bless you abundandtly in your ministry as a friar and a priest!
Best laid plans of men, mice, and friars!😂🤣
Fr Casey, thank you for sharing this story of perseverance and patience.
You look so young to be a priest, Father! That’s what I like being in Catholic Mass because it is organized, uniformity and in unison. Because I’m disorganized myself.
Fr. Casey, this video is a solid confirmation to me that it's a good thing I never became a priest. I admire your fortitude. And your patience, of which I have little.
i never laugh so much Father! may God Always gives you wisdom, joy and peace, and may he continue to bless you in your Journey.
omg! great hilarious story followed by wonderful mini- homily. God bless you, Fr. Casey!