The Secrets of Sherri Papini -with Dr John Matthias, Psychologist
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- DREAM, 4th of July sale: Click the link (or scan QR code) and use code TRUECRIME to get up to 35% off: shopbeam.com/h...
WE WILL BE GOING LIVE ON PATREON DIRECTLY AFTER THIS LIVE FOR A Q & A WITH OUR PATREON MEMBERS: www.patreon.co...
Become a Hidden gem: / @hiddentruecrime
Find exclusive episodes on Patreon: / hiddentruecrime
Lauren Matthias was a television reporter for a decade. She and her husband, Dr. John Matthias, a criminal psychologist, started Hidden True Crime in 2020 with their Season, 'Beyond the Veil,' a psychological deep dive into the doomsday murders of Chad Daybell and Lori Vallow.
What started as a simple conversation at their dinner table became a captivating podcast. Join the dynamic duo of Dr. John Matthias, a forensic psychologist, and Lauren Matthias, an investigative journalist, as they delve into the psychological facets of unthinkable crimes every week. Their unique perspectives and in-depth analysis offer a fresh take on true crime storytelling.
Thank you for your support through sponsorships, subscribing, listening, and becoming a Patreon member at / hiddentruecrime
Become a channel member and gem:
/ @hiddentruecrime
Join for channel emojis:
/ @hiddentruecrime
My son-in-law went to school with Sherri and was very insistent that her disappearance was not going to be a kidnapping…and that was while she was still missing! I thought my SNL was being dramatic…but, he insisted she was crazy and did very bizarre and outrageous things, when he knew her. I really dismissed what he told me…it seemed like gossip…until, she was arrested! He was right about her bizarre antics and an extreme need to be the center of attention! It’s sad she had this terrible childhood that shaped her in such a way, she didn’t deserve it. However, Sherri’s children will forever bear the scars of their mother’s damage and the damage she caused them and will need to work in therapy throughout their lives break the legacy! I hope they have the support and help they need!
I come from a highly abusive and dysfunctional family. The chaos in choosing a dysfunctional relationship is all that is familiar when starting adulthood. It feels like home until you learn after many years of hardship that you were wired to choose like that. It takes a lot of therapy and inner work to make a positive change.
She staged the whole place to make it look like she was captive. she wanted to be found. She wanted that man to be blamed.
She tells on herself when she told Keith “i have to live with the fact that you never found me”
Thanks Dr John I haven’t heard of this case because I live in New Zealand 🇳🇿
You two are so good together and so interesting! Thank you!
Wonderful discussion-the two of you are great!!❤
So, I guess we can classify her book as fiction!!
SCRIPTURE FROM HER BRANDING:
Exodus 21:16
Anyone who kidnaps someone is to be put to death, whether the victim has been sold or is still in the kidnapper’s possession.”
If we don't tell our stories consciously,
We tell our stories unconsciously..
WoW
Right. Wow!
It’s very true.♥️
Dr. John 1:36:51 you plus my therapist are a perfect combination.
Thanks so very much for your insights and quotes.
Which is worse “Taint” or Casey Anthony’s Zenaida Fernandez-Gonzalez' 😭
I would argue taint is worse because it’s not even anything near a name.
Xanaida Fernandez Gonzales aka xanny the nanny at least sounds like a real name
Although both are almost piss taking names vaguely obscuring the truth. On that front; Casey Anthony’s made up name was the most egregiously Machiavellian blatantly pisstaking choice
I thought she chose those names for her book. The therapist told her to choose 2 names since she didn't know the captors names.
Dr John hits it out of the park. I have BPD and insecure attachment. Now in my 70's I am relieved that I have close relationships only with two long suffering but delightful children. I avoid contact with people, live on my own and really love my life for the first time as a semi-recluse. I don't know how to thank Dr John for explaining my odd life long behavior to me. I am deeply grateful that I can die fully understanding myself for the first time. I have peace at last.
Wow I sound a lot like you. I am only 4 mins into the video & saw your comment. I have struggled all my life & now I need to look into this. Thank you for your comment & I need to watch this video.
Huge win for you but keep going and maybe, push yourself to connect a tiny bit , just to rejoice in the more of your expansion. Our children will always do the long -haul. The bigger test is another( not an intimate partner) but just another friend ?
Huge win for you but keep going and maybe, push yourself to connect a tiny bit , just to rejoice in the more of your expansion. Our children will always do the long -haul. The bigger test is another( not an intimate partner) but just another friend ?
Thank you. Making sure John sees your comment ❤
Having spent 40 years feeling nuts, I have educated myself thoroughly with the new research of brain plasticity ( our ability to Rewire old habits on every level and stay in growth mode) I have a license in PT/body therapy and certs in treating trauma. The one that has made more difference than anything is The work of Byron Katie, Feldenkrais’s and Eckart Tolle-just sharing what has brought me back to my heart-and it’s still a challenge . One breath at a time. I always say, The only muscle one ever needs to strengthen is awareness. Sending good juju to everyone-were all in this together
One thing that I've noticed about the various photos of Sherri Papini I've seen is that even when she's posing with her now ex-husband, the focus is on her. When couples pose together for photos, the focus is usually on both partners and not just one.
I've noticed that, too. It's like her husband is a photo prop. Her photos are honestly creep, especially the one where she is looking into the camera, and all you see is the back of Keith's head.
Dr John is a great professor , I never feel like sleeping during his talks!
Unlike you I fell asleep; woke up 2 hours later (time difference) and he’s still ‘analysing'. Or stating the obvious.
@@patpulfer5596you still took the time to comment so obviously something is keeping you interested.
I love it when he discusses the cases. It answers a lot of the whys.
I love that he explains things on the average person's level, without making you feel talked down to.
It is 4 am where I am, I fall asleep, but listen again later on.
Sherri said James was abusive, just like she told friends that Keith was abusive. Thats her M.O to gain sympathy.
Ya, she’s a pathological liar. It’s irks me when people believe something mean she said. Dude, she’s freaking lying all the time to manipulate and gain sympathy. You cannot believe anything she says that makes her look like a victim or someone else look bad.
@@sharonalexander8374 I feel like this is something that happens with people who have dealt with childhood neglect or abuse. I’ve seen it in my own family with my step kids. My husband’s ex-wife is a very volatile and mentally unstable person. A couple of his daughters (all the kids are grown now) are quick to accuse people of abusing them and yet they’ve normalized the abuse from their mom. It’s sad.
I like the new backgrounds! It signifies the change from Vallow/Daybell into something new. 😊
I think you missed one thing. The money. Sherri was on the verge of running out of money. Her severance was nearly gone and Keith separated their finances with a post-nup. Sherrie grew up very poor and had a nice house and life financially. What's she going to do when her severance totally ran out? She was bitter about Keith wanting her to work and be a 1950s housewife. I think her money running out was just another pressure point that caused her to finally act with her fake disappearance.
Oh yes! We should have discussed this more. John and I talked about this before the show as another motive .
Good point
Sounds legit.
Yes
She’s a liar. He didn’t want her to work and be a 50’s housewife. He wanted her to do one of the two and she didn’t want to care for her kids OR work. That’s why she faked the kidnapping. She was about to run out of money, money she used to pay for daycare.
It really annoys me how everyone called her a perfect mom. She literally took her kids to daycare every day and didn't work. Doesn't add up to me.
Lots of cute pics doing lots of fun stuff for Fakebook.
💯💯💯
Oh, it has surfaced that she was making the children sniff rubbing alcohol from a drenched cloth to keep them sick. 😈
Many people do put their children in daycare, even if they’re not working because they want them to get exposure and some social skills before they end school, so I don’t find that part very unusual
@@tcbellszI did that but I took mine to “preschool” and bc she was an only child. Before she started kindergarten. But to take multiple kids to daycare and not be working? Sounds like she just was being selfish imo. But idk all the facts of her case either.
Not to get too personal,but I would love an episode where Dr.John shares what books are on his bookcase behind him. We are book and knowledge lovers. Love you guys I always learn something new .
She was so attention-seeking and controlling and demanding after she came back. She inflicted trauma onto her kids because of a kidnapping that never happened. This lady is CRAZY. And disgusting.
This is the part that disturbs me so much. It was bad enough that she abandoned her husband and CHILDREN for three weeks, but the absolute insane abuse she put them through for YEARS due to her “PTSD” from the “incident” was so selfish and cruel. I understand Dr. John is trying to explain her behavior, but I cannot wrap my brain around someone who needs this much attention. It’s sickening.
Her behaviour could be described as disgusting . The description needs to be more accurate
She psychologically tortured her loved ones. Then turned her guilt outward and inflicted it on little ones. There was a scene where she reacts to eating hot sauce, her son breaks down crying - he’s so attuned to her and worried about her - so much trauma and emotional abuse she inflicted. 😢 Thank god they are no where near her now.
C-PTSD is something that is lifelong. Due to my childhood I met and married an abusive man even though I didn't really want to, thought all that happened to me was my fault. Staying in that abusive marriage for 25 years.
Didn't start to get treatment until I was 47.
Happy now, but I will always be a work in progress
Similar experience 21 year marriage . Freed myself at 42 went to university and have such a beautiful life!
I like to think of my therapy/counselling “Life Maintenance “. Like a hair cut for the soul. I’m grateful I survived to live a simply abundant life.
I'm glad that you've both been able to find healing and good therapists. I'm sorry for the pain and trauma that you both suffered. I wish you both the best!
Agree completely….i was born with a rare genetic disorder, was always told it was my fault, call it an in advance punishment because god knew I’d be evil-according to my BPD/NPD diagnosed “mother”. I won’t go into the beatings, missing chunks of hair, getting beaten by a Priest and a few nuns who would then lock me in a room for hours at a time, days, even once for a month after my PE teacher reported my bleeding welts and scalp. Even though I refused to answer any questions or talk to anyone, the “witch”, now 90, told my daughter last year…(after many years of not talking or seeing her, my brother shamed her into seeing her grandmother one last time…she regrets it) that I told everyone I met I was abused and am an embarrassment of a daughter and mother.
I won’t go into the whole nightmare, suffice it to say, she’s very open into she wishes I’d never been born, I destroyed her life and I’m somehow responsible for everything that’s ever gone wrong in her and my “perfect” brothers life (although I’d still love to know how I caused my brother to be on a Naval ship filled with drugs and prostitutes 🤷🏼♀️😂)
Anyways, was in therapy for MANY years…unfortunately, mental health services in my small town are practically non-existent and most doctors and therapist in the closest larger town don’t accept patients from my county unless they have a way to get there without using our horrible Medicare transportation. I’ve been on a waiting list for 2 years as my depression, negative self talk (AKA the witch’s voice telling me what a worthless, ugly, undeserving of love or happiness, hopeless person I am who will one day burden my children into taking care of me) and even my ADD has gotten worse. I talked my doctor into trying me on a different antidepressant…it made things even worse. My daughter is visiting this week, TRIED to get an appt in Scranton while they’re here…no luck. We’re TRYING to move me closer to my younger daughter, a nurse practitioner..but Senior, handicapped accessible apartments ALSO have long waiting lists, so 🤷🏼♀️. I just do the best I can. My other issue now is I’m in mid-stage kidney failure…can’t find a nephrologist who’s familiar with my genetic disorder, willing to take me. I only have 1 kidney and I’m not a transplant possibility…so, yea. Some days are pretty hard…but..with everything I’ve been through, including my 2 violent marriages..I’m a pretty tough old broad 😉
I should add…my INCREDIBLE Best friend..a retired art professor who also became certified in counseling children..and also had a mother with BPD..insists on being my personal counselor whenever it gets overwhelming. 🥰. Unfortunately, they don’t live close enough to help with appointments…and I’m adamant I don’t want to put them out, or overburden them…but heaven forbid she can’t reach me for a day 😂. She knew I was having a hard time last month..the 3rd anniversary of my precious son’s passing. She and her wonderful hubby showed up and refused to leave until they’d helped me clean, gave me a back massage..and ordered us a pizza 🥰
You should never blame yourself and say it was your fault. You only understood abuse. Self-hatred and self-blame weigh down the soul and make us feel unlovable. No one deserves this.
My brother was an investigator on this case, so it’s always been of high interest to me. Thanks for covering this! I actually haven’t seen the documentary yet.
Omg your brother is so cool! (For being an investigator- I hold them in such high regard) I hope he stays safe out there- clearly there are a lot of crazies out there (ex: Sherri). This docu-series was extremely well done, with lots of detailed information, and a real glimpse into the life & mind of a pathological liar. The documentary was put out by her ex husband Keith (poor guy) bc he wanted to set the record straight that he had absolutely nothing to do with her disappearance, or subsequent reappearance. He also wants it to known that he had nothing to do with any of it! He didn’t know initially that it was a blatant lie or that it was planned & carried out completely by Sherri. To me, even when the first happened- Keith never came off as a liar, or as like a Chris Watts- I never got a vibe that he did something to her. When she came back- I did side eye her story and I even felt guilty that I found it difficult to believe her! My heart breaks for her kids and for Keith. And I hope one day they can see the silver lining that they gained distance from her when they did, bc they deserve to find the peace and happiness. I give it to Keith for raising 2 young children by himself. God bless him & the children. Actually- God bless all of the many people involved in this situation, including your brother! ❤
@@shannonmiles4503 Thanks. It’s like my “15 minutes of fame” only vicariously, through my little bro - LOL!
After Sherri was charged and pled guilty, he (my brother) agreed to talk about the case in detail with me. He was VERY tight lipped before that. I told him when he retires I’m totally pimping him out to my true crime friends so we can all pick his brain!
p.s. I’m totally going to check out the documentary!
What about James Riera the guy that knew she was missing
Where she was at
This doc on Sherri is really good. Ive watched & listened to past info. & this doc explains the most. Well done.
can we talk about the psychology of a man who gets asked to violently beat someone and says, "sure"!
You two are such an equally matched team. Different skill sets, but both excellent in your own field and exceptional together. Thank you.
Thank you guys you are so kind. I would add that Sherri should fear Mexican Women, one of my "chanclas" has her name on it. 😂
😂
Fear the chancla!!🤣🤣
The 3 hoaxes I know of (Jussie S, Carlee R, and Sherri P) all claimed horrible things happened to them and they all described the perps as being a race other than their own. Jussie was claiming a hate crime so his motive here makes sense for that but why did the women do this? Is it racism or is it distancing yourself from the REAL perp (theirselves)? I’d love to hear a psychological take on this.
@@desert_moon 😂
I died laughing when when I was listening to Eminem’s new song Houdini and he said “I’ll disappear like Sherri Pappini!😂😂☠️🤪
I cant' stop listening to it. Shady's back! :)
@@HiddenTrueCrime Same!! He’s so hilarious! I Love him! His confused Siamese cat cracked me up too! I’m so glad he’s back! No other rapper can hold a candle to this man! ❤
Can u imagine the hit to Sherri's ego when that song came out. She's in her glory now! Loving every minute of it. I wonder if shel try to sue him for cash for profiting off her name😆
I watched the live footage of her interrogation once LE knew. My heart just broke for her husband. He was absolutely floored.
Yes! He seems like a good guy. I hope he finds peace and is able to rebuild his life. Maybe even find happiness with someone else.
As for Sheri, I heard she live with her new boyfriend and is writing a children's book. 🙄 Ah Dios Mio! Con esta Vieja!🤦♀️
Yes! And freaking angry-as he should have been.
Do they have kids?
@@bossypants773 Yeah, sure. He walked out of the police interview after police convinced him Sherri lied and then stayed w/her anyway when she convinced him police lied and stayed w/her for 2 more yrs. until she pleaded guilty,
He knew her history of deception & lying. He and his wife also used the nearly $40,000 in GFM donations to pay off their debts etc. and also accepted monthly payments from the state's funds to help victims of crime (which I believe she was required to pay back but not the GFM monies). He should not have enabled his wife. They had children they were suppose to prioritize.
@isabellind1292 Yes, all valid points. I also believe that the husband gained financially from her lies. I think he's benefiting financially from the documentary. I'm sure he got paid for that.
Lauren, SO amazing to see you so rested and glowing! I was worried about you, watching your Daybell trial dailies and it seemed it was taking a toll on your well-being. Tuned in just now and said, "Wow, Lauren is glowing with health again!" Brilliant x
Every day, Lauren looked lovely! I don’t know how she did it. Glad she finally got home, and was able to keep their home straight. ❤️😀❤️
She has enough filler and botox and such to keep her looking fresh
This was such a fascinating episode!!!! Came to the channel for JJ, Tylee and Tammy.... Stayed long term for the unrivaled education and insight!
Lauren and Dr John are such a fantastic team
Same. I'm not really into true crime as a whole and was only here for an explanation of the Vallow/Daybell tragedy. But every time these two pull out a new topic I find out there's more to learn about the human psyche and the behavior it inspires. I'm always riveted.
Thank you!
Taint and Smegma are the nicknames Sherri gave to the two made-up captors in a book she wrote about her kidnapping. The supposed kidnappers didn’t tell her those names.
OMG thank you for commenting! I about choked when I saw the title of the 2nd episode of the doc and have been wondering this whole time what in the world SMEGMA had to do with anything. 😂
Nasty, disgusting names. Officers were probably completely grossed out and suspicious immediately.
That just makes the choice even weirder, tbh
Well, made up people cannot tell anyone their name, right? They don’t exist.
@theferalprogressive1160 Appreciate the comment!!!!
This was EXCELLENT!! I love learning from Dr. John !😍
Coughing is all around! It’s not bothering to us at all! John’s profiling of emotionally sick people is so profound! Thank you both for all your hard work ❤
Her ex boyfriend was told that her husband was abusing her. THAT'S why he didn't tell on her. He is not violent at all.
She didn't even thank him when she left the car HE rented for her TWICE, the food and stuff HE paid for or the long drives he did for her.
I have no empathy for this woman. Most of us have trauma but do not abuse our friends and families to this horrible degree.
For those of us who were severely abused as kids but didn’t develop a personality disorder may be the result of a resource we had that someone didn’t have and our temperament and neurobiology also are a factor. For those of us who just developed PTSD and attachment wounds but escaped developing a PD, we are the lucky ones.
I agree!!
I feel for her, we all have different reactions to trauma., I would never react like she did. But, my personality is different. She is just so messed up. Doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be held responsible for the damage has caused.
@@SMALLDANE - It’s hard to have empathy for Sherri. I agree with you. She did a lot of damage. And she doesn’t seem to care.
Exactly
I totally agree it’s just gross we need to stop giving these people a pass
Thank you for the show. Lauren you look beautiful
This entire thing is bonkers!! Those poor children and poor Kieth. Sherri really should be ashamed of herself regardless of what happened to her when she was a child!!
I too have BPD. And yes, I guarantee you she feels a tremendous amount of shame..
The "supermom" label got me, since she sends her kids to daycare daily in spite of being at stay at home mom!
There “Taint” a kidnapping after all. 🤣
I could listen to Dr. Babe talk - the in depth analysis of whackadoodles all day long. It’s absolutely fascinating. 😆
Wish I could find a therapist like Dr. John
This was so incredibly interesting, honestly feels like such a privilege to just listen to Dr Johns expertise and analysis, thank you both so much for all your hard work!!! ❤
Dr. John, besides being deeply knowledgeable and objective, is also empathic when revealing previous traumas in no-heinous crimes.
I admire his analytical and emotional intelligence!
How do we know that the story Sheree tells about her family life is true. How can we believe anything she says?
Exactly! She’s like the boy who cried wolf. I feel like I can’t believe anything she has said.
I feel like I read that she lied about that too.
@@nbgilbert kids are always a reflection of their parents parental skills or lack thereof.
u. Always? Then, if there are three siblings, does that mean that that all three grow up 5o be the same type people??????? Hello!! NOT in my family! HUGE difference!
Because she had family and neighbors from her childhood that corroborate it
We need a shirt now that says
"It gets more bananas."
- Dr. Babe
😂
Thank you Dr John for talking about CPTSD and acknowledging it. It is so often misdiagnosed as BPD. I think the main difference is the CPTSD is easier to treat, BPD is much harder. But it's important to acknowledge that it is a real diagnosis, a real thing
Is very strange I had a friend growing up would pretend like she was pregnant and buy baby clothes , and make her parents buy baby furniture for her room even though she was never pregnant. and then she thought it was cool to look like she had a broken leg so she would walk around on crutches even though she didn't have a broken leg. and then she wanted to be a homeless person so she got a tent and ran away from home and started living out in the woods for a week until the police found her. Very strange and her parents would enable this.
QQQ?!? HTC, I don’t want you to diagnose me personally obviously but after years of doctors trying to pin down what is wrong with me, I’ve NEVER once heard of a disorganization attachment disorder but when I looked it up because it was brought up on the podcast, I just bawled and bawled.
Why has this never even been mentioned once to me?
I’m not saying I have it but the question I’m truly asking is, is it possible to end up with a disorganized attachment because one parent was incredibly narcissistic and the other vacillated between wanting to be a good parent but often neglected their intuitive ‘good parent’ instincts to keep the peace, with the idea that was in to best interest of the child. when given any second to truly be the child’s best friend (till narc comes calling). Could this dual parent relationship cause disorganized attachment?
Missing some context here. For one, Sherri didn’t say that the names “Taint” and “Smegma” were the names they had given to her. She said they never told her their names. She just used those names in her “book” to have some name to refer to them with, and used it as their “aliases.” She made up the names “Taint” and “Smegma” to clearly give them the most insulting names possible, further revealing her bigotry!
Lauren and John...you two talk so sweet to each other. It makes me happy to see!
Missed, you and Dr John, after justice was served to the chugs, I went into withdrawal, really, you two are dynamic.
Lets not forget the Latino immigrant/Latino community was hurt in all this as well.
The PTSD probably originated in her childhood. I disagree that one has to feel that they are going to die during a trauma in order to develop PTSD. The trauma has to have felt dangerous, which residing with addicts as a kid probably made her feel unsafe and feel that she was in danger.
Dr. John always gives such a clear way to understand situations. We appreciate this thanks Lauren and John.
Omg you read my mind! I was really hoping you’d cover this case. I just watched the documentary on Hulu and was left with more questions than answers. Why did she do this?! I will never understand. I mean I guess the simple answer is for attention, but that doesn’t begin to scratch the surface. I am looking forward to hearing Dr. John’s thoughts on her bizarre behavior.
they didn't get the chains until she was ready to go home. put them on in the car . so she wasn't chained up for real.
Please address this @Hidden True Crime- Some commenters are saying you have key facts wrong, e.g., she was not kept chained to James’ bed.
@Pixie2589 I'm sure they will but it's the middle of the night for them. They have a young child so I'm sure they're sleeping.
@@rebeccazeman9309
Face is toooooooo close.
Sherri is attached to trauma..its all she knows..its her comfort zone..if there is no current trauma she'll create it...poor Keith.. a no win situation
My heart breaks for Keith and his children. I cannot imagine how traumatizing that betrayal must have been for them. I hope that they have good therapists, that they heal, and find peace.
She was not chained to the bed. She made that part up. Idk where you got that from? She asked him to board up the bedroom window that’s it. She had free range of the apartment. James Reyes was at work most of the day and said she sat in the dark guest room most of the time alone. She made him buy the chains once she was already there and wanted to go back home. James Reyes picked her up because she told him she needed to escape her abusive husband. She told James that Keith was physically and SAing her. The DNA found on Sherri’s underwear was touch DNA. They did not have sex. The FBI gave James a lie detector test, asked this exact question, and he passed. He was disappointed when Sherri wanted to leave because he thought they were maybe going to get back together. James obviously isn’t working with a full deck. Sherri knew that, manipulated, and took advantage of him. Sherri also has quite the past of doing similar things. I think your assessment here is way off and factually incorrect.
thank you! they got the chains for when she showed up.
Please address this @Hidden True Crime- Some commenters are saying you have key facts wrong, e.g., she was not kept chained to James’ bed.
This!!
Interesting!
I agree..many facts are wrong.
As a clinical therapist, my thoughts about her seeming trapped in a prison of her own mind would be that everyone can walk through the gate to freedom except her. Same concept with the brand of "exodus." Exodus means "exit, " but she is always trapped and can never get out of her head. Everyone is free to exit her life except her.
Sherri referred to her captors as"Taint" and "Schmegma" . Sherri was making the whole thing up but you missed the point- Sherri said "I'll call them Taint and Schemgma" - because those are bad words to Sherri. She wasn't implying that the women were actually named that or called themselves that. Of course it' all moot because this was a fantasy story.
The symptoms of PTSD she was exhibiting -I would argue are symptoms of extreme anxiety because now she has to worry that no one ever realises that she did.
That was consciousness of guilt.
I would say she is cluster B. A form of narcissism known as covert narcissist. She has no guilt or remorse. Her anxiety may be due to her mask slipping, and being found out but not guilt.
@@kconnor2371 we pretty much agree.
Consciousness of guilt isn’t guilt as in the sense of feeling guilty. It’s more like guilty knowledge.
It’s definitely as you said- the fear of being found out that is causing the anxiety.
Labelling it C/PTSD is actually an insult to people who actually suffer with it.
@Nous520 , moral judgements have no place in criminal psychology. Irrespective of your personal feelings, Sherri has a background of significant relational trauma throughout her formative years. So, the phenomenology points to Complex PTSD for Sherri as much as it does for anyone else. Moreover, personality disorders are attracting scepticism in contemporary neuropsychiatric research, with increasing consensus that personality disorders are often diagnosed when the presentation is more consistent with a complex trauma response. Among the many factors to support this is that women presenting with complex trauma are far more likely to be labelled as having a personality disorder than men who present with similar symptoms. Besides, the labels are far less meaningful than a thorough understanding of Sherri's background, which is rich with data about why she did what she did.
John proposes so many researched ideas….and shows a gentleness.
Something tells me she chose Thanksgiving morning to see if they were going to celebrate _without her_
*BAM* Another trick in her narc bag.
This is great! I love both your viewpoints. Thank you for sharing tonight.
I would like to hear Dr. John talk about Sebastian Rogers’ mom and especially step father. The language he uses when talking about his step son is suspiciously dehumanizing.
I did believe Keith was super controlling he called her nonstop never allowed her to go out by herself. I don’t think he was As innocent as his portrayed, maybe that’s because of how she was talking to men that’s why he was so controlling or maybe he was one of those that accused her all the time so why not if you’re getting blamed for it anyway? I’m not sure I’m just wondering if there were other reasons for this fake abduction
I am sure I am not the only one sitting here listening to Dr John thinking, me too, me too, that's me!
No your not. Although, I am not a fantasy person.
No, you are not. When the greedy advertisers of crap broke our natural birthing connection ( healthy bond), put us on schedules of sugar water ( addicted from cradle to grave) and indoctrinated us away from nature into mechanistic life-it’s proof how amazing we all are to have survived it
@@beanyboomer5391 No, I do not live in a fantasy world either. I guess I was referring more to her upbringing and how it affected her self worth.
@@mainlyfine oo I can relate to everything else.
I grew up with a dad who adopted me who was like Keith and a biological mother as dramatic as Sherri but in different ways.
30 years no contact with my mother and it's been the best 30 years of my life.
🌈 💜 🌈
She merits to be in a clinical setting
Poor husband...
And children she was abusing them!!!!!
Hi Lauren and Dr. John! Thanks and liked! Any chance that we could hear your opinions on Sarah Boone? She certainly seems to be trying the patience of the court. 🤭 God bless.... and liked!
Yes, that would be fantastic
Peter Tragos the Lawyer You Know covered Sarah Boone’s attorney issues today. The judge ordered her to represent herself so she’s attorney #9!
Oh I would really like them to cover this one. She comes across as another Lori vallo, trying to convince everybody she's batshit crazy
Retired Mental-health therapist here. Yes, I agree: repetition compulsion is an effort to gain mastery over abuse and the pattern of abuse, but so often without insight into how their own behaviors end up contributing to just more of the same.
At time stamp 25 minutes, You described ALOT about my childhood and I didn't do anything like this crap! I guess some people need more attention than others. LOL...not very funny for her husband, bless his heart
I keep thinking of that with a lot of these cases. At some point one grows up and deals with it. Maybe I'm too harsh though.
@@ChildofGod-g8fthat doesn’t work for most and for good reason. Trauma causes the brain to form improperly. Furthermore, the behaviors are a manifestation of trauma. That’s like magically expecting someone with PTSD to just stop having it. I got help but it was because I hit a deep bottom AND as a pwBPD, I have empathy, so the deep shame I felt about how I had hurt others helped me to seek recovery. The other cluster B’s don’t have empathy (or much of it). That’s HUGE because if you don’t have empathy, you are stuck in tunnel vision where you can only perceive the world through your own eyes and no one else’s. The result is you are SELFISH and entitled. You’re literally delusional. So while I agree with the sentiment, it’s just not realistic. This is why pwNPD, HPD, or ASPD aren’t capable of rehabilitation (99% anyway)
I saw myself in much of this. My mom had gone through my brother getting burned before she knew she was pregnant with me then she was sick. I don’t feel we bonded. Also I was #. 5 of 7. I remember always trying to be noticed or stand out. I had neighborhood friends when I was young but as I got older I didn’t make friends as easily. I never learned how to be in a relationship and wonder if I was ever a good partner. Retired now and I’m pretty much a hermit
My mom also had trauma in her life as both her parents had passed as she was going to Nursing School in the late 1930’s. Then she was a WWII RN stationed in England
No matter IF YOU AGREE WITH MY STATEMENT OR NOT.... I LIVED IN IT AND EVER DAY TOLD MYSELF THAT I WAS GOING TO BE BETTER THAN THAT!!!! I have a wonderful family, no drugs, no,drinking and no abuse like I grew up with. I LIVE PRETTY MUCH A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE AND BECOME A BETTER PERSON BECAUSE OF THAT.. THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS YOU
Rooted in fantasy... trying to get attention by playing the sexy victim, and falsely accusing others... psychopath!?
I hope at some point you talk about how to handle this type of a child and correct these symptoms
I appreciate Dr. John's input. BPD isn't any easier to deal with for those who unconditionally love people laden with BPD traits (developed around age two) than for the afflicted.
One of the hardest parts for me is how easily people throw around the term narcissist without any understanding of Cluster B Disorders.
Especially knowing that, unlike most levels of natcissism, almost all levels of BPD are now VERY treatable.
Unfortunately, BPD is often misdiagnosed and an "unacceptable" consideration to a few people I knew, and one i still know, well.
I appreciate John and Lauren's no-nonsense and sometimes comical approach to all of these whacked-out crimes.
✌️💜❤️💚💡
She was so lucky I would’ve given anything to have had a normal family life or a normal marriage situation. I was unable to have that because I am everything he’s describing in here and all the family trauma. Complex PTSD however it’s been a lifetime working through it and became very successfulanyway, but there’s still empty patches in my life due to it. Would have loved to have had that stability so sad she threw it away.
Thank You Dr. John. I can find my own empathy for her now...excellent job
Thanks for a great episode. Lots of psychology, whichishow I like it. It’s what separates you from the other true crime channels . Great content with complex ideas and issues but Dr John makes it understandable. Thanks.
I think the desire to be pitied is what drives the compulsion to harm oneself. The want for a parent to care and to protect.
Yes! I've struggled with this compulsion for years (starvation, sleep deprivation, cutting) and didn't know why until I spent some time in therapy. Having my family cover up (and do nothing to stop) childhood SA against me and then punish me for my emotional pain seems to be the crux of it - I just wanted someone to see me hurting, take pity on me and fucking help me!!! It's like I've been screaming for help for almost 40 years. Trying to learn to resolve that pain in healthier ways, now that I understand.
@MoreWordsPlease 🫂 I see you. You are so strong. I'm proud of you. You didn't deserve what you went thru. Stay safe. You are precious.
Hi i'm new here
As someone with CPTSD and ADHD and 60 years old I'll say it's a lifetime of worthwhile work.
Seeing our stuff is incredibly difficult until we actually see se of it clearly and understand it's power was all in the darkness.
Once we look at our stuff without shame, it's just experiences we lived thru.
Such strength helps us to keep revealing our truths to ourselves little by little.
🌈 💜 🌈
I love this!! So insightful!
Exodus 21:16 Anyone who kidnaps someone is to be put to death, whether the victim has been sold or is still in the kidnapper’s possession. (NIV)
The crazy part of this: what "kidnapper" in his right mind would brand a victim with an indictment of himself? Makes me think Sherri did a word search in the Bible and this was the only verse that contained the word "kidnap".
Shape of numbers in the brand do not fit this reference
Sherri learned in childhood that to have care and concern paid to a person, that person would have had physical harm and have been a victim. And I would bet she could recall an event from childhood that is the nexus of this behavior. That is the payoff she is looking for. To feel that feeling of “love” or caring.
Thank you so much for sharing this. Very easy for me to understand Sherri - even if I never acted in that kind of way. I want to ask if John can look into how Borderline diagnosis/name has changed in many countries in Europe. No diagnosis is the same, & especially BL. In Sweden it's called EIPS = Emotional Instability Personal Syndrome Someone with EIPS cant stand being alone, some need their space sometimes. Some doesn't begin with abusing drugs when some do. Impulsiveness is very common though. I'm a former psychiatrist in Sweden, we learned that the first 6 years of a child's life is the most important consider everything. I have the diagnosis EIPS, with a mother who was an alcoholic & very abusive, mentally as physiological. Always screaming in my home. Moved out as 16 years old & started to study & learned many things I never learned as younger. Working with myself, acknowledge what I didn't like about myself, takes a lifetime, but taking accountability & trying to be the best I can be. No one is perfect, but many things we can change, or make a lot better within ourselves. I forgave my mother several years ago, forgiveness is important to me, if possible. I do have a question though, what is John's experience, why some people with this diagnosis who has been hurt as a child do turn their aggressions to hurt others, especially those who are smaller/younger & some turns it inside & begins hurting themselves (I do know/understand why they do it, the pain inside is to much, to put it simply). But what makes someone do one thing or the other? Is it both genetic & social or What? Would appreciate John's perspective on that.
She's is a manipulator. She says, "He loves me," because she had hoped that after this, he would love her. Maybe he always did, But maybe he was verbally abusive in her mind. This would not qualify as abusive if it had been her norm. That could be why she created the stories of physical abuse. Only severe physical abuse qualifies. It's sad that she's still sick. She had extended family who did not rescue her from a loveless childhood. She went through school in poverty and what must have been apparent deprivation, None of that was worthy of attention. She probably interacted with LE when she was on the street. I'm guessing that didn't result in anything she perceived as care. We now know that there is nothing that adequately meets her need. I've yet to meet anyone who embraces "love your neighbor as 'yourself.'" I read that as love your neighbor as your OWN, meaning love THEIR CHILDREN as your own. If we would accept that as part 2 of our singular rule, the world would be a better place. Rescue your neighbor's children in whatever small way possible. That's love. The highest love is loving someone with prepared forgiveness for any and every offense before it happens. Of course, that forgiveness must be accepted in faith. That kind of love relationship is as rare as the perfect father and a good son.
@hiddentruecrime Hi I am a viewver from Sweden, been listening to you guys since the very start . This new format that you have is very good. But sometimes Lauren is in second thoughts, when Dr. John talks, Lauren looks absent and barely responds when he tells something which is a bit of a shame. In addition, the picture is larger of Lauren than of Dr. John, which means that he appears as someone in the background. It gets wrong when it is he who is supposed to talk and analyze people etc. in the program. Thanks for a great true crime channel.
I always learn so much from Dr. John. I haven't been interested in the Sherri Papini case, but I love hidden true crime, so I chose to watch. I'm now taking notes, and googling repetition compulsion. If I'm not learning from Dr. John, I'm getting GREAT movie and book ideas! Thank you Lauren, and Dr Mathias. You guys always do a great job. (I usually get upset with myself if I can't catch your Saturday live) Again, thank you
I never knew this story thank you for covering. Following from Cornwall UK
Australia here. Brilliant
As always I learned a lot from you. Also aspects from my own life became clearer to me.
A huge thank you to the both of you for a brilliant video with love from Denmark 🇩🇰 ❤
WOW!! Dr. John you were on fire here! How FACINATING!
Her trauma comes from her losing control of the facade she created. The more doubt the more harm she is willing to cause to maintain her control of the fantasy. You all love her and miss her and feel so bad for her… that’s the fantasy she is creating. She even set up a meeting to talk about how her people felt when they found out she was found alive… she wanted them to tell her all about it…. So it must be real… but how far are people willing to take their fantasies… to smash their own nose and brand themselves, to take the lives of their own “zombie” children as in the Daybell case. There is a point of no return, dealing with the truth is too hard and they may never want to come back to reality to deal with what they have done. They defend their own reality they have created until they die. Their own personal Hell. I fear this from my own mother. How far is she willing to go to defend her fantasy? That IS the scariest thing in the world! You have to get the hell away from them in order to protect yourself but also to stop allowing them to use you in their future fantasies or to try to make you believe more of their stories… just run!!
Fascinating. As opposed to the rats, we choose familiarity because even in harmful situations it is what we know and feels “safer” than change. That is how scary change can be. I’ve seen this scenario play out in fiction many times. It’s heartbreaking to see it unfold in real life.
❓❓❓can the return to trauma, which you identify, be correllated to addictions ( not compulsions) the extreme attachment to a “self” inflicted masochistic mind-set ?
After going back and looking at several photos of the brand, I think it is Exodus 8:12. That verse is where Moses is told to tell Pharaoh to, “Let my people go”. Which I find an interesting choice, if I am right.
I think I agree with posting on a Reddit forum, the constant push towards patron to get subscribers is annoying. RUclips and sponsorships should be providing your channel a generous amount of money. True Crime is popular on RUclips so your in a good space
A little grace for your channels growth , would go a long way.
We don't constantly push. We do let people know we are doing a private Q & A, and if they personally want that more intimate discussion than YT can offer, they can find us on Patreon. That's relevant. It's also a relevant reason to have a Patreon account. RUclips is public and there are many listeners here. I'm personally unaware of what other channels use their Patreon accounts for, but for us and our more intimate convos, we are grateful Patreon exists and offers us a place to connect on a more personal level for those who are interested.
As far as getting "Paid" more ... We have a family to support, and would like to be paid for our years of education, expertise and mostly--our hard work. Having a Patreon account means more work for us, and additional hours. We'd save so much time not managing a Patreon account. A monthly membership on Patreon, opposed to the volatile up and down nature of YT, and relying on the unpredictable "algorithms" means more stability for our family, and reassurance we can continue without looking for others jobs.
@@HiddenTrueCrime 'The lady doth protest too much, methinks.
Dr. John! Looking sharp with the new background. Nice job you two. 🌷 Lauren, it looks great, seems to really suit his personality & shows off Dr. John's love of books 📚👨🏻⚕️
This was one of my all time favorites. Dr. John is brilliant!
Thank you Dr John and Lauren for this wonderful commentary on what may have (most definitely) gone on in her brain. I’ve been following this story for years, watched the Dateline with our favorite Keith Morrison, and all the other episodes on this case. You have NOT misrepresented this case at all. Facts or not, the way SHERRI portrayed them was what you were basing this off of and I appreciate that!! Side note, my mom used to wrap a washcloth around our necks with cotton balls soaked in alcohol to soothe our sore throats. (Me and my siblings). I looked it up, it’s an old wives tale, and I KNOW my mom wasn’t trying to poison me! Haha. That was in the 80’s though- so by this time she should have known (and mostly did) better. ❤❤
This is truly amazing analysis.. thank you
Does Dr John have any books? I can’t thank you enough for your description of possible outcomes from childhood trauma. Your description of how my mother in law treated her children when young and throughout their lives painted a clear picture of helping me to understand the personalities of all the children,now adults in the family.
Im baffled by the venomous need on the part of some viewers to be 'the most correct'. Is a minor disputed fact on Sherri Papini really the hill on which you want to die?