Listen: I dig in to make sure we get to the bottom of the “why” behind decisions and debts, and I make very clear the guest and the audience understands how bad those debts are… … that does not mean we can judge them as actual human beings and their marriage over all. Be KIND in the comments please. These people were bad a** enough to come on the show in the first place, and that deserves some love.
My jaw literally dropped when she was throwing shade at the hubby for "paying off debt and working". She had to have known that wouldn't go over well on this channel.
I think it rly showed how opposite their mindsets are. She sees as far as tomorrow and he’s looking at a few years. Neither is far enough but theyre still extremely different
I think people are being really unfair towards her. She works 80h a week. Your mental health is important, and if you keep balance by going to cinema from time to time to remind yourself there is a world outside of your screen then its your right to do so. Not to mention that they are just married and hardly see eachother. If you dont make active effort to spend nice time together then this relationship is going to end. I know one couple who did exactly that. The guy was so focused on building savings that he refused to go to dinner, vacation, anything that costs money basically, even though they were financially fine. Now they are divorced, he has all the money but no wife because he didnt nurture the mental side of relationship.
@@mald379 I'll give you that one of the main reasons relationships end is the guy stops dating the girl. That is true, but relationships also end when values are diametrically opposed. I didn't get the sense the guy is overly controlling but relationships require sacrifices from both people. If they can't make any recessions at all the relationship was likely going to fail regardless.
@@mald379I get the idea of work life balance and mental health… but it’s clear there’s an impulse control problem here and there’s no balance. Her laughing instead of taking it seriously is really telling and insanely cavalier
"You want to spend $1.7T on F-35s? You have 922 perfectly good F-16s and 127 F-22s and .... whats wrong with the literally thosands of fighter jets you already have!?!" as he crescendos into squeaky squeak
"is that more important that getting out of debt?" that was my mantra for almost 10 years. It took from 35 to 45 of years of age of bus taking and top ramen but Merry Christmas to me debt free 3 weeks ago.
Congrats session! I've finally dialed mine down to about a year to be completely debt free and have my emergency fund up to par. Keep up the awesome work! I wish you all the success!
I agree with all of that but ramen is soooooo bad for you. Like literally 2000mg of sodium in every pack. That is insane. There is healthy cheap options, Chick peas, peanut butter and jelly, rice, beans, legumes, chicken etc…. Just saying. Surviving on ramen for years will affect your health. What is the point of getting out of debt if you’re going to be too unhealthy to enjoy it?
Something to remember: those 2 years will pass by no matter what you do. EITHER you can be debt free in 2 years or you can still be stuck in this mess. That's it.
@@patricec.2957I was thinking the same thing, they might experience burnout I honestly hope they address their mental health first and foremost, remember to take those paid vacations and time off
I agree with this. I know it's kind of his shtick and there are definitely some people who deserve it, but the calmer ones are a little bit easier to watch I think?
Caleb, a thought for the editor: You speak very quickly in the payoff plan, and I think it'd be helpful to have a timeline graphic on screen, showing the progress and paying off to freedom 💜
This is an amazing suggestion. I think it would be easy for the guests to just screenshot and keep with them. I think a lot about the recent update and how the budget and timeline seemed to go through one ear and out the other-- I'm guilty of this, too! If it were me, I would add the screenshots as my lock and home screen 😅
TImelines are the best graphic for showing a plan like this, maybe even have what happens each month with the money left over after the budget, they could put a green square on the timeline that says $4000 TO SAVINGS this month.
I think she’s someone that would respond really well to thinking of purchases in terms of hours worked. It’s so eye opening to tell yourself “I’m gonna have to work for 2 hours for this bottle of puzzle glue” instead of just saying “ this puzzle glue cost $18”.
When I first started working I did that. I still do, its in the back of my mind but damn. that shit hurts when you be wanting to buy something expensive. You be like "oh shit 40 hours minimum right here"
This along with the health benefits is why I can’t go out to eat including fast food more then once a week. I think to myself “Is this meal really worth 1-2 hours worth of my time?”
It also helps with understanding what ARE more valid expenses as well. For example, if my work pay rate is X, and buying a new tool is 5X, but that tool is going to save me 6 hours of work a week, yeah it's a lot of money to pay at once, but it pays for itself in a WEEK.
The wedding advice is killer. My wife and I purchased our first house in place of paying for a big wedding. We now own two it was the smartest decision i have ever made financially.
Same here! 10 years ago, court wedding, 500$ dinner, 30%down on house, 2 week Hawaii honeymoon! And almost done paying our house down next year 🎉! I always talk down weddings!
“I wanna enjoy the money I make!” What she isn’t wrapping her head around is that debt means you are enjoying that money BEFORE you ever make it. I recently learned this of myself. If I’m forever spending money I haven’t made yet I’ll never actually have any money.
That man is auch a good husband. Im half way through and the little things like him saying "I loke puzzles too" to help support his wife is heartwarming.
That support is why they struggling but he is most definitely a good husband. He tried to lighten her accountability (straightening), and I ain't mad at him. I hope she realizes her actions and don't put them in this situation again
a good husband would not support his wife into taking so much debt. he dont even need to work a second job. she made a big mess, she should work those 2 full jobs. he's working just to pay off her fun shopping. he may love her, but he's too weak to lead her. and she acts like a child without supervision.
@@123ABC488 wrong, they are married, her finances are no longer only hers, she impacts her husband too, so he can tell her to either stop/control it or he's gone. he can choose to leave and he should leave if she dont change her behavior, that's his option and she can indeed do what she want, but know that she may end up single.
Exactly the same!! Courthouse wearing a thrifted dress, then pizza and beer with our closest friends and family after 🥰 wouldn’t have changed a thing about it!
I didn't have a ton of hope until I saw the tears, her defensive/laughing wall dropped and the reality hit hard. That NEEDED to happen, I'm rooting for these two!
I'm glad she finally started to take the problem seriously instead of giggling like an infant. Luckily Caleb didn't fall for the oh-I'm-such-an-airhead act.
You need to understand reality. At 30.. her SELF ESTEEM is tied directly to what she can buy. Budgeting will absolutely destroy their intimacy and then the crocodile tears will start. This guy is doomed
@@IAmebAdger her emotions are literally what got her into this mess. Her brain is beyond damaged. $20k on a destination wedding is the "cheap" option. All that TV and unreasonable expectations set on her by American culture. She could have walked into a courthouse and gotten it for free (it's about $150) and then had a ceremony years down the line like millions of other Americans. Or how about the fact that they had to cut out a part of the video because "she couldn't live without subscriptions?" How dumb is that. You can't give up $40 of subscriptions. Can't give up Netflix. This chick is beyond delusional. To anyone who's seeing this in the future: when paying the bills means you end up with a negative balance, _you can't afford anything_. Nothing. 0. Until you get to a place where you pay all of your bills and you have money left over, you literally cannot buy Starbucks coffee. You can't pay for Netflix. You can't pay for eggs. You have to live "horribly" for a while until your debts are paid. Downgrade your Internet to the lowest speed. Cancel all of your phone plans and go with the cheapest provider. Liquidate all of your personal belongings, like your TV and other assets. THERE IS NO CHOICE! You're going to lose it all anyways when your assets are repossessed or you have to declare bankruptcy.
Wow. Her mood totally flipped once she heard how long it would take to pay off. I think thats what she needed to hear to realize how bad this situation really is.
Yes because her laughing at everything was too much for me. Even though she has a degree she needs to mature.. She needs to watch episodes with older people without saving and struggling…
Caleb, I say this as a psychiatrist: 1) Thanks for always putting an emphasis on the value of therapy and the link between financial concerns and mental health concerns. 2) Your motivational interviewing skills are impressive when working with someone who is not yet committed to change.
I started seeing a therapist because my wife and I had problems. Realized how much impact lying to her about my debt had on our relationship. My wife and I are now in the best spot we've ever been. Our communication and partnership is strong. Communication is so vital to a healthy marriage and really healthy relationships. I'm almost debt free and I update my wife on the balance so that we're both on the same page.
@@unnamed154Man, I'm so glad to hear you and your wife are on the same page financially. Really makes the relationship that much better too. Good job!
@@TheStarForge if they’d allow me to be in that amount of debt, my life would be better. But it’s also because I’m not in that amount of debt, that the small debt I have could be paid in a few paychecks, and it’s only put off because until my current job, I was struggling to even survive. Better days come ahead, and it’s great that it comes when I have a better foundation to build up financially and do it properly. America today often relies on going to debt for life.
@@qwertpoiuy430 American banks and loan companies want you to be in debt. Minimum payment is always slightly above interest rates to keep you feeling like you are paying off your debts but infact it just balloons up. You start off with a debt of 1000$ but after paying pretty much only minimum payments you ended up paying 2-3k... its stupid. People should be forced to have a proper education and/or have to attend credit card educational classes before you are allowed to get a card.
@@sheralync5854 it was probably the quickest and easiest session of our premarital counseling. Clear mortgage ASAP, no other debt, live within means, be generous. Everything else we've been figuring out together as we go.
Kudos to him for actually being able to answer questions about some of the things. "It has the number on the second page" is way more awareness than most people here.
A few minutes in and I'm resolved more than ever that if I ever get married it's gotta be to someone who has similar goals financially. Imagine being this deep in the hole and when you are trying to climb out, your partner not only doesn't help you but just grabs a shovel.
100% correct. I married a financially illiterate woman and the hoops I have to jump through to make sure we are financially sound while making an income that puts me in the top 8% is stupid.
@@gobot4455sorry to hear that sir, but what would you say (if any) were some redflags before you got married? I know hindsight can be 20/20, so is there any advice you would give a young man who wants to avoid that situation? Would be appreciated so I and others dont fall for the same thing
I hope she realizes that a lot of this was her choice, and if she thinks life won’t be enjoyable during these two years imagine how much worse it will be when she is 65 with no retirement and still has lingering debts.
I can't even convince myself to get a phone on payments, and these people are buying dumb misc stuff they don't even need racking up crippling interest on them..
heck, it will be worse after those two years go by without progress. If they want to buy a house and "get away from all that," they might not be able to even get approved for a mortgage.
@@disguiseddv8ant486 there are plenty of women who are great with money, plenty of men who are awful with money. Just look at the many people who come on the show. You can't see past your own ego.
I love that even though David was more serious about paying their debt asap, he made sure to take ownership of how he contributed and didn’t just shift the blame to Ariel. They’ve got this ❤
6 minutes in and I already feel bad for this guy. Tough to achieve a goal when your partner doesn’t seem to take it seriously. I will say mad respect to both of them for working 2 jobs but gotta keep that end goal in mind.
This is a prime example of someone looking to feed off the resources of another. NEVER get into a relationship with someone with unattended debt and a head in the sand attitude. I can guarantee if this guy doesn't drop her she will be out the door as soon as her debts have been lowered or cleared by this guy's hard work.
LOL you really think that's what's on most people's minds when they're doing the horizontal bop? I seriously doubt that them not having kids was an executive decision given how the rest of the finances look. They're childless by pure luck of birth control methods at this point and you have no evidence to prove she's not pregnant at the time this was even filmed. Don't get me wrong, I completely agree with you but my cynicism just tells me it's way too optimistic.
@@dieseldaveee3724if they will take a destination wedding on a whim without the money to pay for it, they’d have a kid without thinking about it too if this doesn’t open their eyes at all.
My wife and I had a backyard wedding in October of 2020. We made a ton of brisket/pulled pork and assorted sides, bought all drinks/plates/utensils at Costco and used handmade decorations/centerpieces. We spent about $1200 and had the best day ever. Weddings don't have to be painful.
I object to paying for destination weddings, often to places I wouldn’t choose to go to with people I wouldn’t go on vacation with. I say no to all these wedding invitations
My wife and I did this as well in April 2021. Best decision we could have made. My sister and her husband went the opposite route and spent close to $30,000 and at this point they aren’t even sure if their marriage will even work.
@@mssdn8976I object to even going to destination weddings. Unless it’s a really close friend or family I really want to spend the time with, why would I use my money and vacation time to go to someone else’s destination of choice, and spend $$$ for hotels, flights, gifts. Specially given that the chances of them getting divorced eventually is pretty damn high.
I was glad to see her shed a tear after 40 minutes of nervous laughter. I think she was trying to avoid feeling the stress of their situation and in that moment I think she finally let herself be real with herself.
@@hiteshadhikariHe's not exactly a financial guru himself, that $45k car was not a better choice than her constant Amazon purchases. Suggesting a divorce here is unhinged.
@@CSpottsGaming ome seems to be serious about paying debt, other laughs it off One gets a 45k car which they use for work and life, other chooses a destination wedding as cheap option One is tensed, other finds debt funny
Glad to finally see someone close to my age. We were in the same boat early 30s, 100G in debt worked our butts off and paid it off in 3.5 years. You guys can do it.
@@izzywoods794the OP and his spouse paid $28,571 a year for that goal. If a couple makes $80k together that's very doable. Cooking at home, free dates only, my husband and I lived on 50k for a couple years, it's possible. Also side jobs here and there help.
@izzywoods794 I had 3 jobs, (vet tech jobs were in need) and I think it helped that it was during covid so we only were spending money on groceries and not eating out. Also, easier in your 20s and early 30s. Now I'm too tired to work a full week lol
When she said she wants to enjoy some of the money she made, you should have hit her with "You already did enjoy this money. That's why you in debt.". She obviously doesn't understand that she's working to pay back money already spent.
Easily the BEST episode you’ve done. What started off as her arrogance and denial turned into regret and acceptance, and you could tell he was really just wanting her to get on board with something it seems he’s been concerned about for some time but she wouldn’t take seriously. Also A Plus to Caleb for fully hashing out the severity of their current financial and marital future and giving them something to look forward to.
It is not uncommon for some people in uncomfortable situations to laugh. That doesn't mean they find the situation funny or are not taking it seriously. Commenters are being downright cruel to this woman because they are misinterpreting her laughs. It is evident the woman knows how serious things have gotten as evidenced by her crying throughout the 2nd half of the video & by her taking on a 2nd job working 80 hours a week. I can't imagine how humbling it must be to come onto this show.
Totally. I don't think people know how tough it is to realize you have a problem and go on camera to be criticized. It's even more tough to let go of pride and admit you've been a fool on camera. Defensive laughter is understandable.
He goes hard so comments want to go harder. But absolutely she knows it's serious. It's a defensive laugh, it's the last thing you can do before and after you cry. Both of them should have pride in the fact that they are grinding so hard. If they go this hard they can put it behind them in two years and come out ahead. That's a ton of effort, likely far more than most of these commenters are willing to put in.
Last year we had a family vacation planned and booked. I ask my wife if we had money to pay for the whole vacation with cash. She said no. I told her to cancel the whole thing. We sat down together with the kids and explained the reality of saving for vacation. We went camping at a local lake instead of going on a big trip. Kids loved the beach time all week and it cost like $800.00 family of 4 for a week.
Exactly. I start each trip out of debt, pre-pay for flights, hotel/lodging, rental car, have cash on hand/in savings acct awaiting the trip, and have a timeline to pay off any unexpected spending (life does happen). My vacations actually are stress free. While its weird to not have that money stress at first, being thrifty for so long is actually still my happy place. Life is too short to be stressing over debt for material junk. I want life experiences with friends and fam.
The audacity to be the creator of the majority of debt in the relationship and still almost insult your husband for trying to pay it off as quickly as possible
I‘m German and even though I don’t understand everything in the American money system, I love this show. Makes me think twice about every purchase and keeps me shoveling hundreds of €€ into my savings each month. 😅
Ich bin vor fast 15 Jahren hierher gezogen und das Leben auf Pump ist hier leider sehr weit verbreitet. Weiss noch wie schwer ich es fand in D meine erste Kreditkarte zu kriegen und dann kam ich hier an mit 0 History und hatte innerhalb von 2 Jahren 4 Karten 😬. Spar schön weiter! So mach ich das auch und die Videos motivieren immer!
As a fellow European I just don't understand the mindset of these people. The wife's body language says "guilty and knowing" all the time but yet she spends without thinking about it. The American finance system is just a sick business of seducing you into debt fast and easy and next punish you hard if you can't pay it back. It is very tempting for those looking for instant gratification.
So many of the guests struggle to say why they’re spending money on stupid stuff…this young woman said what a lot of people are unwilling to say which is she wants to be able to enjoy her life now vs setting herself up for a more enjoyable life down the road. It’s definitely dumb and eventually has to stop but at least she recognized it and said it out loud!
Technically, if you're not to enjoy your life when you're young, then when? When you're 60-70 years old and you can barely move around, and the things you can physically and mentally do are pretty limited. If you have no one to inherit your debt, then fuck it. Save some retirement money and fuck the debt, let it pile. The easiest debt to not pay is medical.
I love when couples come on!!! It’s great to see how they actually deal with fiancés instead of one person come on where we don’t get the full picture. I’m sure Caleb appreciates that as well!!
SUCH good advice Caleb gave on weddings, unreal how many people screw the rest of their marriage going way overboard on one day as if they live in a fairy tale or their life is a movie. This is real life and in real life having a happy and comfortable life going forward is WAAAAAAY more Important than your “SpECial DaY”, screw the one day, and besides you can make it special without spending gobs of money on it!
A degree is just a piece of paper that says you showed up to class and did your homework for 2-4-6-8 yrs. Oh and you pay between 25 - 150,000 $ for it.
@DJSolistica that completely simplified what it means to go to school. many people have other obligations such as work and children outside of school. Graduate school is a whole other beast especially if you want to work in medicine and law. it shows more than just doing the bare minimum in life
She has a degree in a field that was different than she thought it was when she started studying, but then apparently she just completed the program instead of switching when she found this out, didn’t know the career required certification and failed the test… then was too lazy to take the test a second time.
@@DJSolisticathis that blue collar slave dollar mindset brother. Getting a degree can truly be a game changer. And that isn’t to say that being blue collar is bad but that little piece of paper is more than attendance lol
Just paid off my last dime of credit card debt, only have the mortgage now. Caleb's inspirational speech is spot on in the end, the feeling of freedom that my money is mine, is unspeakable. Great job with this couple!
Heck yeah! you rock! I just finished the credit card debt a bit ago & now just mortage & car. Trying to get agressive with it :) Keep on truckin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
123k of bad debt that would take them 2.5 years to pay off at their current rate of both working 80h/w. That's just insane. It's completely unsustainable. I feel bad for them.
@@Dan16673she might change. I’m hopeful. Because 123k is a lot. I guess she just needed someone like Caleb to wake her up about their (mostly her) situation. Plus she paid off some cards. Try to be optimistic.
"helping others (who watch the show) ..." is very true. I tend to go over my budgeting spreadsheets/debt repayment history while watching this show. It's like after watching "Hoarders" and then I clean my entire house.
My husband and I lived in roach infested hell to knock off student loans and save enough to move. IT SUCKS. But our lives are so amazing now. We own our home, we have a baby and we have actual money to save for retirement AND fun. It can be done, you just have to do the hard stuff.
My friend had a wedding that cost him $30k, he doesn't remember his wedding. He advised me to do something small and cheap cause it'll mean more and I'll remember the small details better. Had a perfect wedding for $3k. Don't go crazy into debt for a wedding.
I spent $40K on my wedding and yeah I would not recommend it. It didn’t ruin us financially or anything, but we could have gotten in a house a few years earlier had we used it toward that instead.
@@daveobrien2365 I spent about 5k on my wedding. We got a venue for 2.5k that usually would’ve been like 7k because we booked it when it was about 1.5 months out. They basically wouldn’t have made anything if someone like us wouldn’t have booked it last minute. The catering was the majority of the rest of the money, and then I used my moms dress. Any other money went to cheap decor and my husband’s suit. That’s it
I love how Caleb sympathized with them towards the end. It finally hit her and I really hope she gets it. Seeing her vulnerable and showing emotional gave me a sigh of relief because the constant push back and laughing was aggravating. Best of luck to them!
Good job Caleb. This is the wake up call that they needed, especially the wife. As the show progressed, she realized the gravity of the situation. Over $120,000 in debt is very serious.
Most women never grow up past 14 years old. When you hear the fraze of keeping up with the jones's. Women want to keep up with status of there friends and strangers cuz they care about more what a strange has and to make there friends feel jealous
I feel for her… Working 80hrs a week SUCKS. Thinking you’ll need to do this for TWO YEARS and enjoy NONE of it??? It’s not easy. I’m gonna have to do it for 4 months right now and that’s rough for me. I hope she powers through it. Caleb feeding into longterm goals and the future for couples is great.
Just an FYI for people who love puzzles and streaming and feel bereft during working on debt - like books, your local library often rents puzzles and DVDs and often has associations with streaming services like Kanopy. If you are worried about paying for a library card, they're free if you live within the city/county the library is associated with. Just sharing free fun in case someone needs it
I’m in Australia so I’m not too sure if the US is the same but here you can borrow almost anything from a library, books, DVDs, puzzles, audio books, kids toys, even tools like table saws & drills and of course they have computers, printers, laminators etc. that you can use on site. I’m always shocked how many people don’t know it exists, by far my greatest resource
@@mapleearles6051Toys and table saws & drills? That's really cool! I'm in the US and I've not seen a library rent those things, but I think that's brilliant!
This! it definitely depends on the quality of your library but many of them have so much great media for absolutely free, such an underutilized resource the library is so dope dude
I listen to 3-4 audiobooks a week with Libby/overdrive, which I can borrow for free with my library card, I can download them straight from the state library with an app.
My wife and I got married while still having debt. We cash flowed a backyard wedding (2021, so covid played a role). I smoked a bunch of meat leading up to the wedding, we got sides from the local BBQ place, we rented a tent, it was BYOB, and our friends said it was one of the most fun weddings they'd been to. The whole thing cost less than $10,000. Probably closer to $5,000.
Fellow 5k wedding here, and our friends said the same. We kept the guest list limited, the music playing and the bar open and everyone still talks about how fun it was. Smoking your own meats is genius wish we'd have thought to do that too.
I did a backyard wedding as well, 2020 so COVID helped. We ordered a bunch of Chinese food and kept it small. Probably $500 spent since parents had a bunch of party supplies already and only real expenses was the food. And my best friend married us for free.
My husband and I cash flowed our wedding and honeymoon. My hometown is cheap and we had a small wedding, like 40 people. We spent on the things we cared about, like photography and catering. It cost us about $12K, $17K including the honeymoon. And we all look back at that day fondly. We saved for about a year.
26:50 is exactly the logic that I used to have and the majority of Americans have, we are so miserable from working constantly and having no money that we spend what money we do have on little nonsense things and call that happiness. Thats why I love this show cause it paints a big picture!
Dude this whole episode is a collection of my greatest fears especially the money burning wife or partner. I’ve been blessed enough to have been married to my wife for 10 years who helps me in everything. She keeps me healthy, happy, and helps me achieve my goals ever since we met 20 years ago as kids.
you can tell Caleb is a nice person. he rips into them then immediately apologizes afterwards for doing it. He does not feel comfortable making people feel bad!
Yep, it’s “tough love”. We all need it sometimes. Too many people just validate our bad choices and say stuff like “you’re just being you” or “it’s ok to treat yourself”. No. Sometimes good friends need to tell you painful truths.
@@sarahuber8567some people are sensitive, so when he’s giving them this budget, it’s less likely they will make some bs up in their head and say “well he’s giving me this strict budget because he hates me and I can let up here and there” because he lets them know he’s not here to attack but to help.
Caleb's uplifting pep-talk at the end made me cry!! Caleb, your words are sweet, wise, and very professional. What a gift you gave to this couple, and to everyone watching who can relate!! Thank you so much for spreading the word of financial literacy!!
The common thread through a lot of these audits are people who "want the things that I want," even when they cannot afford them. Financial literacy is so important!!
She is just embarrassed for being called out on her prior decisions. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. They can definitely get through this. Thank you Caleb for your financial insight. ❤
They are very cute couple, and im glad they are together. But I feel the man needs to be more of the captain of the ship. I think they can get through it. I’ve been broke with my husband before, small studio, cards for game night together and cheap wine or crash bandicoot on my old family playstation.dollar tree shopping. It was great times actually.
Choosing the right partner with similar goals and mindset is SO important. Good for them for being on the show & trying to aim to be in a better situation.
Wow, this was probably one of my top couples episode. The way Caleb spoke to her about the students loans after being so vulnerable on this show...just amazing. It was supportive, he was able to relate and talk about it in such a positive way and encouraged them to keep going to better themselves for their future family. This couple is at least honest and have started before they came onto the show. They acknowledge it and have goals, and knew the exact figures! I wish them the best of luck.
Caleb! Don't be self conscious about the high pitch. It's a staple part of your brand at this point and it's one of those small enjoyments we get that keep us coming back. Like mawmaw always said, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
The best message Caleb offers is how draining and demoralizing it is when you are in your 60's and are struggling to live and you look back at all the money wasted 😢 on credit card spending when you were younger. If Caleb had been advising when I was in my 30's my life now would be much easier. I wish this couple the best of luck.😊
Yes this. Being mortal, frail, physically unable to do what you could before as you did before....a lot of young people naturally can't comprehend it. The expensive pleasures of youth have a direct cost on the ease of life later.
Since I've started watching Caleb, I've managed to save 60% of my monthly income. No more useless spending, no more Amazon binge, greatly reduced my takeout/ordering food rate (I've started cooking fit recipes), and only strict spending. By December I'll be able to boast a fully-funded reserve emergency fund, stock market investments and a tiny real estate investment as well. Thanks Caleb!
@@MC4TWT I only eat out what I can’t easily make myself. So my eating out literally alternates between Chinese and Chickfila. More cfa now that chinese is crazy expensive
I can't understand the logic of working 80 hour to pay for activities that is "necessary" to cope with working 2 jobs. But the IRS thank you for your contribution.
Because the therapy cost a couple hundred max, while the job earns them a lot more money. You're right, in a normal situation, it makes no sense, but if you're well over $100,000 in debt, it becomes a good trade off for a temporary solution to solve the issues
I know sad. 80 hours is a lot. 12 hours a day 7 days a week or 16 hours a day 5. Sometimes my work has these overtime requirements like this and I have no time for fun, likes it not possible. Eat, sleep, repeat
I have a lot of respect for the guests that come on and sit through these sessions. It's got to be embarrassing. The urge to defend yourself has to be nearly all consuming. Even more respect to people for fighting that urge and listen to the advice despite whether or not it is feasible/manageable for them. You're doing an important service Caleb.
I grew up with my mom always in debt, everytime I asked for something she "didn't have the money" and is "drowning in debt" so I've always thought struggling financially is normal, until I started living on my own with a student job and man it's so easy not to be in debt, just don't buy things you can't afford. My roomate needed a pc for uni/gaming, he bought a gaming laptop for 1200€, I bought a used desktop for 200€ that I can game on, saved 1000€ comparatively. He bought a new bike for 700€, I bought an old one for 40€. His parents helped him so that's not really debt, but that's still a sign for financial irresponsibility.
I wouldn't say financial irresponsibility if your room mate has the financial backing in the form of his parents. I purchased property while in university because I knew my parents were backing me in those decisions. Also can your laptop play games well? A gaming laptop is usually more expensive than just a daily driver laptop. It doesn't seem comparable? I'm of the belief that as long as you're purchasing within your means and you're using these items extensively, it is a good investment to pay for better quality for longer lasting items.
I started mine a few months ago but never cared to check until I watched his first episode a few days ago!! I ran to my account immediately. 🍻 cheers to financial freedom!
You'll be so thankful for it. I'm 41, and it's very reassuring when the only thing you have to do is a few mild tweaks here and there to make up a mild shortfall as opposed to complete overhaul of your lifestyle.
As a soon to be certified financial counselor the way you handled this couple was a Masterclass. You never shifter blame solely onto anyone, let them come to their own conclusions, and while your own counseling style is certainly more passionate than most. You still managed to stress the importance of cutting back on certain spending and while it seemed you were dragging the wife the husband realized he was also a big reason their debt was so deep. Great as always Mr. Hammer.
I cannot believe my husband and I are the same age as these people. How do people get themselves to such horrifying financial positions. This is wild. At our big age.
He made it p clear they got carried away in the wedding. I can understand it on his side and I dont think its bad to enjoy in the moment once in a while working together to pay it off latee but his wife never stopped and did not contribute to pay off until now
I really respect how Caleb handles these conversations. He knows when to dig in but also when to take his foot off the gas. It’s really compassionate and actually helps people. I hope this couple listens to him because they could be successful and have a better marriage in the long run.
Your pep talk at the end was so heartwarming. Your empathy shows so much. Im rooting for them and hope they pull through. Sending lots of kindness to them as a couple. The honeymoon phase flies quickly when youre in debt but you can do it!
This is the sweetest couple and I wish them every success. Ariel, I felt your tears! Please know that "future you" is going to be so thankful and proud of you for doing the hard thing. Both of you are there to support one another and you can do it. Please keep us updated. ❤❤❤
As someone who only recently was able to wrap their head around my own financial situation; seeing this episode makes me realize how important being on the same page with my partner is. Thank you Caleb!
A lot of the people in the comments forget that the husband actually had a ton of debt and made a lot of mistakes too. They both probably had the exact same financial state of mind, but then decided to clean up after. The husband was faster to internalize it, but its obvious shes struggling with the mindset switch, which is valid. Its hard to rewrite that sort of thing. Another thing is she makes most of the money, she works very hard too - 80 hours - so she is willing to work hard and make sacrifices, its this last step that she needs to take. People should be more sympathetic. Its very hard not to be defensive when you're attacked so directly with a camera on you. I'd like to see anyone else not feel the urge to laugh to ease the tension and try to rationalize in that moment.
Nah she's garbo. No care or desire to fix anything. This isn't something it's OK to come around on eventually. She's educated enough she knows she's fucking them both and doesn't care.
It's the mindset though "I buy things for my future" Caleb asks to see the Amazon purchases "No" She doesn't take it serious and makes bs justifications. Sure they both made bad choices but they have very different mindsets about the situation
The husband said he brought her on the show so someone else can tell her what she’s doing wrong. She probably felt ganged up on. In my opinion I think she would benefit from some therapy to work on impulse management because once she masters that she’ll be golden
This interview is an excellent demonstration on how instant gratification is addictive and such an easyhabit to slip into. It’s insidious. I hope this lovely couple manage to stick to the plan and avoid taking on new debt.
She said "ecommerce" and my mind immediately went to "dropship". I was a sucker for those kind of courses a few years back. Lesson: You have to absolutely be on top of your personal finances before becoming a CFO of your own brand. It will reflect.
Thank you for being vulnerable and putting your information out for us to see. It’s very inspiring and I hope you two succeed and we all get to see you back on the show to celebrate your progress!
Your videos have always been of great help. The fact that you convey these truly daunting concepts so simply has helped me improve my financial skills and I can't thank you enough.
This makes me thankful that I had the money talk with my soon to be fiancé. While she may be in debt she has a great budget and is busting her butt to pay it off and will be done in like 6 months. So proud of her and us being on the same page. Have those conversations with your partners people!
my husband and I are both lunatics with no empathy (I'm schizoid, he's got ASPD) so dating was hard already, but then dealing with morons who cannot function without shooting dollar bills out their butts drove us both up a wall. We found each other by chance and being with someone on the same page as you money wise is such a blessing lmfao. No debt here. I spanged my ass off when I was homeless to afford school and saved up 5k sewn into my gd clothes, bought a car in cash, I turned into a total miser. I got dinner out of starbucks dumpsters and I'll be happy never eating a cold panini again in this lifetime. His mom worked at a college so he got a free ride and now that degree pays for everything, I take care of our farm and every household duty, and trade labor for labor. (I just tilled someone's plot in exchange for gutter installation, as an example.) It's the LIFE. He works from home, comes to hang out with me and the chickens on his work laptop -- put a router in the barn so he can take calls in the fields. It's so comfy. Put your needs first, idc how mean you are about it, your dates aren't going to make a club around your bad attitude and even if they do WHO CARES. Find someone on your page, or else you'll be adding divorce lawyer debt on top of your load. also date for at least 5 years, we went for ten but we're not the norm idk how normie dating works but you guys get hitched way too quick. All those love chemicals blind you or something. Put infatuation out of your reasoning and look at your partner objectively as a person or business partner and make your decisions that way. THEN you can be madly in love and all that gross stuff.
Big shout out to this couple for putting selves out there. I watch so many of these videos, but this was the only one that resonated with me and actually received some takeaways. To the wife, do not beat yourself up about many of us have or are in the same boat including myself and you and your husband was brave enough to make efforts for change
can we talk about how this couple represents most of us with money, remember the loud minority of the people who are watching videos like this are probably more financially savvy or farther in their journey of being better with money - I have so much hope for this couple, I wish the best for them!!!
She knew what she was getting into. You told her the truth. She has a soft heart (which is a beautiful thing). And working 80 hours, which is rough. I would have reacted the same way. All the best to them. I hope they are able to do it and get out from under this.
Car culture in the States is crazy. Sounds like this couple could make do with 1 vehicle which would get rid of those massive car payments and the 10k loan that was budgeted for as the downgrade car purchase.
The problem is, in the US many towns and aome cities you have to use a car to get around and the uk you don't unless in the countryside. There is hardly any paths to cross roads so it hard in US not to have a car
Listen: I dig in to make sure we get to the bottom of the “why” behind decisions and debts, and I make very clear the guest and the audience understands how bad those debts are…
… that does not mean we can judge them as actual human beings and their marriage over all.
Be KIND in the comments please. These people were bad a** enough to come on the show in the first place, and that deserves some love.
Caleb I understand your need to make this disclaimer but couples like this need a REAL wake up call. This is their futures in stake.
Thank you Caleb for all you do to help people and their finances!
You are incredibly well spoken Caleb!!
YES!❤❤❤❤❤
Thanks for this!
My jaw literally dropped when she was throwing shade at the hubby for "paying off debt and working". She had to have known that wouldn't go over well on this channel.
I think it rly showed how opposite their mindsets are. She sees as far as tomorrow and he’s looking at a few years. Neither is far enough but theyre still extremely different
I think people are being really unfair towards her. She works 80h a week. Your mental health is important, and if you keep balance by going to cinema from time to time to remind yourself there is a world outside of your screen then its your right to do so. Not to mention that they are just married and hardly see eachother. If you dont make active effort to spend nice time together then this relationship is going to end. I know one couple who did exactly that. The guy was so focused on building savings that he refused to go to dinner, vacation, anything that costs money basically, even though they were financially fine. Now they are divorced, he has all the money but no wife because he didnt nurture the mental side of relationship.
@@mald379 I'll give you that one of the main reasons relationships end is the guy stops dating the girl. That is true, but relationships also end when values are diametrically opposed. I didn't get the sense the guy is overly controlling but relationships require sacrifices from both people. If they can't make any recessions at all the relationship was likely going to fail regardless.
Right??? Good for him being a mole in a hole
@@mald379I get the idea of work life balance and mental health… but it’s clear there’s an impulse control problem here and there’s no balance. Her laughing instead of taking it seriously is really telling and insanely cavalier
Daily routine:
1. Watch calebs financial audit
2. Contemplate my financial decisions for the rest of the day
My tv broke a month ago and i still cant think about getting a new one without caleb asking me why? in my head
I cut my credit cards up and deleted my doordash account cause of this channel lol
I started baking my own bread because of this channel
@@Junereth I want this so badly to not be a joke lmao
I haven't eaten in 3 months because of this channel
I want Caleb to do these audits during congressional budget meetings.
He'd have a mental breakdown. Way too much taquitos, way too much b.s. and his voice would get so high pitched it would break.
It’d be interesting to see financial audits for all the governments of the world or even just on a state level
except governments dont work the same as people, so youd be comparing apples to oranges
"You want to spend $1.7T on F-35s? You have 922 perfectly good F-16s and 127 F-22s and .... whats wrong with the literally thosands of fighter jets you already have!?!" as he crescendos into squeaky squeak
The government is not a household or a business. Stop pretending this is true. It’s factually not.
"is that more important that getting out of debt?" that was my mantra for almost 10 years. It took from 35 to 45 of years of age of bus taking and top ramen but Merry Christmas to me debt free 3 weeks ago.
Lets fucking GOOOOOOOOO!!!! Congrats man, welcome to the free life
Congrats session! I've finally dialed mine down to about a year to be completely debt free and have my emergency fund up to par.
Keep up the awesome work! I wish you all the success!
I agree with all of that but ramen is soooooo bad for you. Like literally 2000mg of sodium in every pack. That is insane.
There is healthy cheap options,
Chick peas, peanut butter and jelly, rice, beans, legumes, chicken etc…. Just saying.
Surviving on ramen for years will affect your health. What is the point of getting out of debt if you’re going to be too unhealthy to enjoy it?
Why you had debt? Debt scare the s out of. I go in sleeping paralysis if I get a loan.
Wow .... congrats! The dedication is impressive
Paying Amazon her husband's salary right back is horrifying. That man has the patience of a saint.
He needs to get a real job
@@CocoaPuff01 This is trash tier logic. If you have EVER used Amazon, then calling it or any other service that you use "not a real job" is retarded.
@@CocoaPuff01he makes good money they just can’t keep it
@@CocoaPuff01 the man works 80 hrs a week trying to work up the ranks to a CEO position. He is doing fine
@@justinwood7156 he delivers pizza for a living, causing HER to work 80 hour weeks to make up for his lack of salary. She needs a new husband
Imagine a future.. where Caleb gets that match on Hinge, and immediately financially audits her.
Yesss! Haha
Not a bad idea considering that’s his entire staple. It would be ironic if he dated a girl neck deep in debt
😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣
He'd find himself a credit card person to settle down with
Something to remember: those 2 years will pass by no matter what you do. EITHER you can be debt free in 2 years or you can still be stuck in this mess. That's it.
good mindset.
Great way to see it, freedom only costs 24 months
@@SemajRaff not that easy, we speak about 80 hours a week for 2 years, i wonder who can resist at that
@@patricec.2957 totally forget that’s what they were doing, doesn’t sound as easy now. Hoping they can lock in and clean up this mess
@@patricec.2957I was thinking the same thing, they might experience burnout I honestly hope they address their mental health first and foremost, remember to take those paid vacations and time off
I really prefer this calmer approach of the old videos more than the new one.
I agree with this. I know it's kind of his shtick and there are definitely some people who deserve it, but the calmer ones are a little bit easier to watch I think?
@@AP-qc7dy agree. i think it helps to have receptive guests, but unfortunately that isn't always the case leading to Caleb becoming too shouty.
Caleb, a thought for the editor: You speak very quickly in the payoff plan, and I think it'd be helpful to have a timeline graphic on screen, showing the progress and paying off to freedom 💜
A timeline graphic would be a great visual!
Yea this video he seemed to talk really fast, faster than normal.
@@superbigblackprobs because it’s a super long video
This is an amazing suggestion. I think it would be easy for the guests to just screenshot and keep with them. I think a lot about the recent update and how the budget and timeline seemed to go through one ear and out the other-- I'm guilty of this, too! If it were me, I would add the screenshots as my lock and home screen 😅
TImelines are the best graphic for showing a plan like this, maybe even have what happens each month with the money left over after the budget, they could put a green square on the timeline that says $4000 TO SAVINGS this month.
THE UPLOADING CONSISTENCY
Caleb’s a content beast
I know every other day I got a new audit to watch.
I love it, but I only found Caleb about a month ago, and even then, I'm struggling to binge it all 😂
So many people financially ill = content
National laboratories use Caleb’s uploads to calibrate their atomic clock.
I think she’s someone that would respond really well to thinking of purchases in terms of hours worked. It’s so eye opening to tell yourself “I’m gonna have to work for 2 hours for this bottle of puzzle glue” instead of just saying “ this puzzle glue cost $18”.
This line of thinking really helped me to reel in my spending. It's like yeah it seems cheap but is it worth me working an hour for it?
When I first started working I did that. I still do, its in the back of my mind but damn. that shit hurts when you be wanting to buy something expensive. You be like "oh shit 40 hours minimum right here"
This along with the health benefits is why I can’t go out to eat including fast food more then once a week. I think to myself “Is this meal really worth 1-2 hours worth of my time?”
When I was addicted to substances I wouldn’t think “this is $60 “ I would think “is this more valuable than 2 blues?” Often times I would say no
It also helps with understanding what ARE more valid expenses as well. For example, if my work pay rate is X, and buying a new tool is 5X, but that tool is going to save me 6 hours of work a week, yeah it's a lot of money to pay at once, but it pays for itself in a WEEK.
The wedding advice is killer. My wife and I purchased our first house in place of paying for a big wedding. We now own two it was the smartest decision i have ever made financially.
Abso-fucking-lutely, good job to the both of you
Same here! 10 years ago, court wedding, 500$ dinner, 30%down on house, 2 week Hawaii honeymoon! And almost done paying our house down next year 🎉! I always talk down weddings!
Too**
And great job 👏🏾👏🏾
@@Digitalknifeparty no two as in 2. I dont own a house too. Learn english. Lmfao
I will never understand expensive weddings. I got married at the court house--way cheaper and no stress at all.
“I wanna enjoy the money I make!” What she isn’t wrapping her head around is that debt means you are enjoying that money BEFORE you ever make it. I recently learned this of myself. If I’m forever spending money I haven’t made yet I’ll never actually have any money.
She already enjoyed the money she is/will make.
It's a cat and mouse chase, where debt will always win if you let it be and not change expending habits
When he tried to make that clear to her you can just tell that was the moment she shut down. She just did not want to hear the truth.
Exactly 💯
The money a man makes is ‘our money” and the money she makes is for her…….crazy
That man is auch a good husband. Im half way through and the little things like him saying "I loke puzzles too" to help support his wife is heartwarming.
That support is why they struggling but he is most definitely a good husband. He tried to lighten her accountability (straightening), and I ain't mad at him. I hope she realizes her actions and don't put them in this situation again
a good husband would not support his wife into taking so much debt.
he dont even need to work a second job.
she made a big mess, she should work those 2 full jobs.
he's working just to pay off her fun shopping.
he may love her, but he's too weak to lead her.
and she acts like a child without supervision.
He’s not a good husband he’s an enabling husband.
@@robert8930 true but women do what they want!
@@123ABC488 wrong, they are married, her finances are no longer only hers, she impacts her husband too, so he can tell her to either stop/control it or he's gone.
he can choose to leave and he should leave if she dont change her behavior, that's his option and she can indeed do what she want, but know that she may end up single.
The best financial decision I ever made was to get married at the court house with a $400 dollar dinner followed after. ❤
Exactly the same!! Courthouse wearing a thrifted dress, then pizza and beer with our closest friends and family after 🥰 wouldn’t have changed a thing about it!
Yup courthouse and a bbq in my in-laws back yard that they paid for.
Same thing I did and I don’t regret not having a wedding at all!
My wife and I had waffles for Breakfast after getting married... and we're not poor by any means. Love is what truly matters.
$400 dollar dinner???
I didn't have a ton of hope until I saw the tears, her defensive/laughing wall dropped and the reality hit hard. That NEEDED to happen, I'm rooting for these two!
I'm glad she finally started to take the problem seriously instead of giggling like an infant. Luckily Caleb didn't fall for the oh-I'm-such-an-airhead act.
You need to understand reality. At 30.. her SELF ESTEEM is tied directly to what she can buy. Budgeting will absolutely destroy their intimacy and then the crocodile tears will start. This guy is doomed
Caleb, the weight loss is visible. You look GREAT!
Caleb at the end of the video: "No one is judging you for emotions"
Comments section:
@@IAmebAdger her emotions are literally what got her into this mess. Her brain is beyond damaged. $20k on a destination wedding is the "cheap" option. All that TV and unreasonable expectations set on her by American culture. She could have walked into a courthouse and gotten it for free (it's about $150) and then had a ceremony years down the line like millions of other Americans. Or how about the fact that they had to cut out a part of the video because "she couldn't live without subscriptions?" How dumb is that. You can't give up $40 of subscriptions. Can't give up Netflix. This chick is beyond delusional.
To anyone who's seeing this in the future: when paying the bills means you end up with a negative balance, _you can't afford anything_. Nothing. 0. Until you get to a place where you pay all of your bills and you have money left over, you literally cannot buy Starbucks coffee. You can't pay for Netflix. You can't pay for eggs. You have to live "horribly" for a while until your debts are paid. Downgrade your Internet to the lowest speed. Cancel all of your phone plans and go with the cheapest provider. Liquidate all of your personal belongings, like your TV and other assets. THERE IS NO CHOICE! You're going to lose it all anyways when your assets are repossessed or you have to declare bankruptcy.
Wow. Her mood totally flipped once she heard how long it would take to pay off. I think thats what she needed to hear to realize how bad this situation really is.
Yes because her laughing at everything was too much for me. Even though she has a degree she needs to mature.. She needs to watch episodes with older people without saving and struggling…
@@psr076it’s a coping mechanism even Caleb mentions it. How does the host understand this but you don’t
@@MrMikeDao I did get it but for me everything for me it was too much . I ‘m pretty it must unnerve her husband …
For those curious: 1:09:14 (plus maybe a couple minutes before)
42:05 I think her mood also shifted right before this. When she found out the student loans were more than she thought.
Caleb, I say this as a psychiatrist: 1) Thanks for always putting an emphasis on the value of therapy and the link between financial concerns and mental health concerns. 2) Your motivational interviewing skills are impressive when working with someone who is not yet committed to change.
I started seeing a therapist because my wife and I had problems. Realized how much impact lying to her about my debt had on our relationship. My wife and I are now in the best spot we've ever been. Our communication and partnership is strong. Communication is so vital to a healthy marriage and really healthy relationships. I'm almost debt free and I update my wife on the balance so that we're both on the same page.
My mental health sucks, and my Financials are great. Guess I save when I'm suicidal.
I was thinking the same thing watching other videos. Okay MI 👏
@@jupiterthree5228if your financials are great, talk to your doctor. The best thing that ever happened to me
@@unnamed154Man, I'm so glad to hear you and your wife are on the same page financially. Really makes the relationship that much better too. Good job!
10 years ago I divorced a man who almost ran me into bankruptcy. Best decision ever as I'm wealthy and completely debt free now.
Yeah dude needs to leave right away. Is your ex broke?
@@Dan16673 You bet he is lol, but he found a new woman he can drag down ;).
Sounds like you dodged a bullet. I hope this dude dodges the bullet that is his wife
@@sunnysunshine6271 no shit? Good for you! Glad my wife and I are on the same page
@@Dan16673 👍🏼
I live paycheck to paycheck but holy shit these videos make me feel way better about my financial situation.
Yeah same
Bro SAME, like what the hell haha.
@@TheStarForge if they’d allow me to be in that amount of debt, my life would be better.
But it’s also because I’m not in that amount of debt, that the small debt I have could be paid in a few paychecks, and it’s only put off because until my current job, I was struggling to even survive. Better days come ahead, and it’s great that it comes when I have a better foundation to build up financially and do it properly. America today often relies on going to debt for life.
big same
@@qwertpoiuy430 American banks and loan companies want you to be in debt. Minimum payment is always slightly above interest rates to keep you feeling like you are paying off your debts but infact it just balloons up. You start off with a debt of 1000$ but after paying pretty much only minimum payments you ended up paying 2-3k... its stupid. People should be forced to have a proper education and/or have to attend credit card educational classes before you are allowed to get a card.
Everyone needs to financially audit their dates and girl/boyfriends before marriage... this is a terrible situation.
Agree!!!
👏
It sounds like this was mostly after marriage. They both decided to have the destination wedding .
that is part of pre-marital counselling. Are they aligned on financial approach/plan.
@@sheralync5854 it was probably the quickest and easiest session of our premarital counseling. Clear mortgage ASAP, no other debt, live within means, be generous. Everything else we've been figuring out together as we go.
Kudos to him for actually being able to answer questions about some of the things. "It has the number on the second page" is way more awareness than most people here.
A few minutes in and I'm resolved more than ever that if I ever get married it's gotta be to someone who has similar goals financially. Imagine being this deep in the hole and when you are trying to climb out, your partner not only doesn't help you but just grabs a shovel.
Financial related issues is the number one reason next to infidelity for divorces in the United States.
That is a smart and wise choice sir!
100% correct. I married a financially illiterate woman and the hoops I have to jump through to make sure we are financially sound while making an income that puts me in the top 8% is stupid.
@@gobot4455sorry to hear that sir, but what would you say (if any) were some redflags before you got married? I know hindsight can be 20/20, so is there any advice you would give a young man who wants to avoid that situation? Would be appreciated so I and others dont fall for the same thing
And laughs about it
I hope she realizes that a lot of this was her choice, and if she thinks life won’t be enjoyable during these two years imagine how much worse it will be when she is 65 with no retirement and still has lingering debts.
I can't even convince myself to get a phone on payments, and these people are buying dumb misc stuff they don't even need racking up crippling interest on them..
From that look, I doubt it. There needs to be more carrots in the plan. There is no way this will go thru. Marriage counseling is the only hope.
heck, it will be worse after those two years go by without progress. If they want to buy a house and "get away from all that," they might not be able to even get approved for a mortgage.
@@disguiseddv8ant486 there are plenty of women who are great with money, plenty of men who are awful with money. Just look at the many people who come on the show. You can't see past your own ego.
@@disguiseddv8ant486”Most females” I think it’s actually most people in general.
I love that even though David was more serious about paying their debt asap, he made sure to take ownership of how he contributed and didn’t just shift the blame to Ariel. They’ve got this ❤
by the end of the session, they BOTH seemed more aligned as partners - when at the beginning Ariel was reluctant. I feel they saw the light for sure.
@@wt_9026agree. Glad they'll likely succeed financially!
Of course you loved that. Typical woman
You just want it to be the man's fault.
even though its all ariels fault
When he said “because I like puzzles too” all but broke my heart.
Yeah that's when it was clear to me that he wants to be spending a little on fun too but he's fighting to get out of this debt for them first.
6 minutes in and I already feel bad for this guy. Tough to achieve a goal when your partner doesn’t seem to take it seriously. I will say mad respect to both of them for working 2 jobs but gotta keep that end goal in mind.
YUP, feel bad for him too but he also is dealing with it. Divorce coming
Ol’ buddy gotta be regretting the marriage
Yeah, imagine getting insulted by your spouse for wanting to pay off consumer debt.
This is a prime example of someone looking to feed off the resources of another. NEVER get into a relationship with someone with unattended debt and a head in the sand attitude. I can guarantee if this guy doesn't drop her she will be out the door as soon as her debts have been lowered or cleared by this guy's hard work.
It's tragic. Makes me appreciate my wife that much more.
They better not even think about having kids until they're both on board to fix this mess.
LOL you really think that's what's on most people's minds when they're doing the horizontal bop? I seriously doubt that them not having kids was an executive decision given how the rest of the finances look. They're childless by pure luck of birth control methods at this point and you have no evidence to prove she's not pregnant at the time this was even filmed.
Don't get me wrong, I completely agree with you but my cynicism just tells me it's way too optimistic.
@@dieseldaveee3724if they will take a destination wedding on a whim without the money to pay for it, they’d have a kid without thinking about it too if this doesn’t open their eyes at all.
The don’t need children or a house until they get their finances in order.
Aren’t kids the fix? Im pretty sure studies show that popping out a couple of kids is the quickest way to fix marital problems
@@TonyCox1351😂😂😂😂
My wife and I had a backyard wedding in October of 2020. We made a ton of brisket/pulled pork and assorted sides, bought all drinks/plates/utensils at Costco and used handmade decorations/centerpieces. We spent about $1200 and had the best day ever. Weddings don't have to be painful.
I object to paying for destination weddings, often to places I wouldn’t choose to go to with people I wouldn’t go on vacation with. I say no to all these wedding invitations
Yeah the crazy part is she probably could've fed most if not everyone she wanted to invite for the same price if not less
That’s awesome! The best things and memories are DIY, not a catered experience
My wife and I did this as well in April 2021. Best decision we could have made. My sister and her husband went the opposite route and spent close to $30,000 and at this point they aren’t even sure if their marriage will even work.
@@mssdn8976I object to even going to destination weddings. Unless it’s a really close friend or family I really want to spend the time with, why would I use my money and vacation time to go to someone else’s destination of choice, and spend $$$ for hotels, flights, gifts. Specially given that the chances of them getting divorced eventually is pretty damn high.
I was glad to see her shed a tear after 40 minutes of nervous laughter. I think she was trying to avoid feeling the stress of their situation and in that moment I think she finally let herself be real with herself.
A hour and 20 min episode? I know this will be an all timer. Caleb’s consistency is unreal
Thank you for your support!
Slow clap for Caleb on this episode, what incredible navigation with this couple and the respect given to their debt and plan.
@@CalebHammerthis is legitimately one of my fave episodes. Great work Caleb
You know, consistency is a foundational pillar of good budgeting and good finances, so it makes sense
Please follow up with this couple in six months. Petal to the metal on their debt. Rooting for you both.
pedal lol. i just imagine holding a flower petal to a piece of metal while shouting encouragment!
@@alephnaught8343😂😂
If he is any smart, he would divorce her
@@hiteshadhikariHe's not exactly a financial guru himself, that $45k car was not a better choice than her constant Amazon purchases.
Suggesting a divorce here is unhinged.
@@CSpottsGaming ome seems to be serious about paying debt, other laughs it off
One gets a 45k car which they use for work and life, other chooses a destination wedding as cheap option
One is tensed, other finds debt funny
Glad to finally see someone close to my age. We were in the same boat early 30s, 100G in debt worked our butts off and paid it off in 3.5 years. You guys can do it.
This is so inspiring. I love to see it and it makes me hopeful!!
Can i ask how? Did you have a high paying couple jobs? Or budget super intensely?
@@izzywoods794the OP and his spouse paid $28,571 a year for that goal. If a couple makes $80k together that's very doable. Cooking at home, free dates only, my husband and I lived on 50k for a couple years, it's possible.
Also side jobs here and there help.
@izzywoods794 I had 3 jobs, (vet tech jobs were in need) and I think it helped that it was during covid so we only were spending money on groceries and not eating out. Also, easier in your 20s and early 30s. Now I'm too tired to work a full week lol
@CalebHammer we need some of these success stories? New series idea?
That girl found herself one GREAT man.
When she said she wants to enjoy some of the money she made, you should have hit her with "You already did enjoy this money. That's why you in debt.". She obviously doesn't understand that she's working to pay back money already spent.
i said that in my head lol
I feel like people think of debt as free money
Thought the exact same thing.
"You enjoyed money you didn't make!!"
Great point.
I can't think of any stuff they sell on Amazon that would be worth working 80 hours a week for the rest of my life for...
Easily the BEST episode you’ve done. What started off as her arrogance and denial turned into regret and acceptance, and you could tell he was really just wanting her to get on board with something it seems he’s been concerned about for some time but she wouldn’t take seriously. Also A Plus to Caleb for fully hashing out the severity of their current financial and marital future and giving them something to look forward to.
Idk if thats arrogance but denial for sure
If me and my ex husband had Caleb’s advice when we were married, we may have stayed together.
It is not uncommon for some people in uncomfortable situations to laugh. That doesn't mean they find the situation funny or are not taking it seriously. Commenters are being downright cruel to this woman because they are misinterpreting her laughs. It is evident the woman knows how serious things have gotten as evidenced by her crying throughout the 2nd half of the video & by her taking on a 2nd job working 80 hours a week. I can't imagine how humbling it must be to come onto this show.
100%. The comment sections is downright toxic right now.
Totally. I don't think people know how tough it is to realize you have a problem and go on camera to be criticized. It's even more tough to let go of pride and admit you've been a fool on camera. Defensive laughter is understandable.
Indeed! I would not have the bravery to do this. I hope they achieve all the dreams they share.
He goes hard so comments want to go harder.
But absolutely she knows it's serious. It's a defensive laugh, it's the last thing you can do before and after you cry.
Both of them should have pride in the fact that they are grinding so hard. If they go this hard they can put it behind them in two years and come out ahead. That's a ton of effort, likely far more than most of these commenters are willing to put in.
Agreed, she's just trying to cope she was crying intermittently throughout the whole video.
Last year we had a family vacation planned and booked. I ask my wife if we had money to pay for the whole vacation with cash. She said no. I told her to cancel the whole thing. We sat down together with the kids and explained the reality of saving for vacation. We went camping at a local lake instead of going on a big trip. Kids loved the beach time all week and it cost like $800.00 family of 4 for a week.
Exactly. I start each trip out of debt, pre-pay for flights, hotel/lodging, rental car, have cash on hand/in savings acct awaiting the trip, and have a timeline to pay off any unexpected spending (life does happen). My vacations actually are stress free.
While its weird to not have that money stress at first, being thrifty for so long is actually still my happy place. Life is too short to be stressing over debt for material junk. I want life experiences with friends and fam.
The audacity to be the creator of the majority of debt in the relationship and still almost insult your husband for trying to pay it off as quickly as possible
The audacity ticks me off too.
I‘m German and even though I don’t understand everything in the American money system, I love this show. Makes me think twice about every purchase and keeps me shoveling hundreds of €€ into my savings each month. 😅
Ich bin vor fast 15 Jahren hierher gezogen und das Leben auf Pump ist hier leider sehr weit verbreitet. Weiss noch wie schwer ich es fand in D meine erste Kreditkarte zu kriegen und dann kam ich hier an mit 0 History und hatte innerhalb von 2 Jahren 4 Karten 😬. Spar schön weiter! So mach ich das auch und die Videos motivieren immer!
The scary thing is the credit score. Sounds like something coming out of communist china
Hat auf mich denselben Effekt 😂 Lieb diese Videos
I'll catch you up to speed. Everything is run on debt, healthcare costs a lot, the wealthy carry the country on their taxes.
As a fellow European I just don't understand the mindset of these people. The wife's body language says "guilty and knowing" all the time but yet she spends without thinking about it. The American finance system is just a sick business of seducing you into debt fast and easy and next punish you hard if you can't pay it back. It is very tempting for those looking for instant gratification.
So many of the guests struggle to say why they’re spending money on stupid stuff…this young woman said what a lot of people are unwilling to say which is she wants to be able to enjoy her life now vs setting herself up for a more enjoyable life down the road. It’s definitely dumb and eventually has to stop but at least she recognized it and said it out loud!
Technically, if you're not to enjoy your life when you're young, then when? When you're 60-70 years old and you can barely move around, and the things you can physically and mentally do are pretty limited. If you have no one to inherit your debt, then fuck it. Save some retirement money and fuck the debt, let it pile. The easiest debt to not pay is medical.
I love when couples come on!!! It’s great to see how they actually deal with fiancés instead of one person come on where we don’t get the full picture.
I’m sure Caleb appreciates that as well!!
Absolutely!
Although I definitely like the couple ones I do feel bad when the debt is almost 100% one person's because the focus is clearly on one person
@@Sadreath agreed.
@@Sadreath Especially since the meeting must have lasted more than 1.5h xD
@@jonathonvoegtli4699 I felt bad for the husband since his wife was running them into the poor house and he's working all the time!
SUCH good advice Caleb gave on weddings, unreal how many people screw the rest of their marriage going way overboard on one day as if they live in a fairy tale or their life is a movie. This is real life and in real life having a happy and comfortable life going forward is WAAAAAAY more Important than your “SpECial DaY”, screw the one day, and besides you can make it special without spending gobs of money on it!
She has a degree, he’s a pizza boy. He’s more sensible.
Never mistake intelligence with education.
A degree is just a piece of paper that says you showed up to class and did your homework for 2-4-6-8 yrs.
Oh and you pay between 25 - 150,000 $ for it.
@DJSolistica that completely simplified what it means to go to school. many people have other obligations such as work and children outside of school. Graduate school is a whole other beast especially if you want to work in medicine and law. it shows more than just doing the bare minimum in life
She has a degree in a field that was different than she thought it was when she started studying, but then apparently she just completed the program instead of switching when she found this out, didn’t know the career required certification and failed the test… then was too lazy to take the test a second time.
@@DJSolisticathis that blue collar slave dollar mindset brother. Getting a degree can truly be a game changer. And that isn’t to say that being blue collar is bad but that little piece of paper is more than attendance lol
Yea she should be the pizza girl.
Just paid off my last dime of credit card debt, only have the mortgage now. Caleb's inspirational speech is spot on in the end, the feeling of freedom that my money is mine, is unspeakable. Great job with this couple!
Good for you!😊
Congratulations! I'm so happy for you 😁
Y’all sound like bots. Not sure why we should congratulate you for finally having common sense
@@danielredziniak2996 zzzzzz
Heck yeah! you rock!
I just finished the credit card debt a bit ago & now just mortage & car. Trying to get agressive with it :)
Keep on truckin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
123k of bad debt that would take them 2.5 years to pay off at their current rate of both working 80h/w. That's just insane. It's completely unsustainable. I feel bad for them.
Wont able. She will not change
I feel worse for him than her
It doesn’t have to be sustainable, it’s for 2.5 years.
At her current rate of spending, she’ll need to work 80 hours a week just to survive forever.
@@adamseidel9780 this gal is out of control and will be poor forever
@@Dan16673she might change. I’m hopeful. Because 123k is a lot. I guess she just needed someone like Caleb to wake her up about their (mostly her) situation. Plus she paid off some cards. Try to be optimistic.
"helping others (who watch the show) ..." is very true. I tend to go over my budgeting spreadsheets/debt repayment history while watching this show. It's like after watching "Hoarders" and then I clean my entire house.
My husband and I lived in roach infested hell to knock off student loans and save enough to move. IT SUCKS. But our lives are so amazing now. We own our home, we have a baby and we have actual money to save for retirement AND fun. It can be done, you just have to do the hard stuff.
Not roaches😭😭😭
@@izzywoods794yes , roaches💁
oh my god the roaches.....that's actually really commendable (you deserve all the good)
Awesome
Hats off to you two! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
My friend had a wedding that cost him $30k, he doesn't remember his wedding. He advised me to do something small and cheap cause it'll mean more and I'll remember the small details better. Had a perfect wedding for $3k. Don't go crazy into debt for a wedding.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🥂🍾
THIS.
Same we had 80 people, Italian catered food for like $750 and a $600 venue.
I think our wedding totaled at $2500
I spent $40K on my wedding and yeah I would not recommend it. It didn’t ruin us financially or anything, but we could have gotten in a house a few years earlier had we used it toward that instead.
@@daveobrien2365 I spent about 5k on my wedding. We got a venue for 2.5k that usually would’ve been like 7k because we booked it when it was about 1.5 months out. They basically wouldn’t have made anything if someone like us wouldn’t have booked it last minute. The catering was the majority of the rest of the money, and then I used my moms dress. Any other money went to cheap decor and my husband’s suit. That’s it
I love how Caleb sympathized with them towards the end. It finally hit her and I really hope she gets it. Seeing her vulnerable and showing emotional gave me a sigh of relief because the constant push back and laughing was aggravating. Best of luck to them!
She only appeared vulnerable and emotional so Caleb would lay off her, it will not change her behavior.
Her laughing seemed like a defence mechanism to me but yes, I agree
@@CairynJayi was thinking nervous laughter
She had the face of I'm just going to sit through the rest of this but I ain't doing none of that.
I wouldn’t get offended by the laughter, she’s probably nervous knowing she’s on RUclips for all of the criticism and negative comments
Literally didn’t buy ice cream cause I heard Caleb screaming you can’t afford it 😭😂
Good job Caleb. This is the wake up call that they needed, especially the wife. As the show progressed, she realized the gravity of the situation. Over $120,000 in debt is very serious.
Petition to get this man 1 million subscribers by the end of the year!
That would be amazing; you’ve all already done so much- I couldn’t ask for more ❤️
Aleph naught should be going for infinite subscribers.
@@joekerr3638 ha, countably infinite tho.
I've told everyone I know, especially kids under 25, to watch him.
Man, I feel bad for this guy. She's dragging both of them down. She's 30 and has the mentality of a teenager.
Most women never grow up past 14 years old. When you hear the fraze of keeping up with the jones's. Women want to keep up with status of there friends and strangers cuz they care about more what a strange has and to make there friends feel jealous
She is definitely going to spend them into oblivion. I cannot imagine this type of mindset.
“I work two jobs so I can enjoy my life now” spends her money hanging a puzzle on the wall
I feel for her… Working 80hrs a week SUCKS. Thinking you’ll need to do this for TWO YEARS and enjoy NONE of it??? It’s not easy. I’m gonna have to do it for 4 months right now and that’s rough for me.
I hope she powers through it. Caleb feeding into longterm goals and the future for couples is great.
Just an FYI for people who love puzzles and streaming and feel bereft during working on debt - like books, your local library often rents puzzles and DVDs and often has associations with streaming services like Kanopy. If you are worried about paying for a library card, they're free if you live within the city/county the library is associated with. Just sharing free fun in case someone needs it
I’m in Australia so I’m not too sure if the US is the same but here you can borrow almost anything from a library, books, DVDs, puzzles, audio books, kids toys, even tools like table saws & drills and of course they have computers, printers, laminators etc. that you can use on site. I’m always shocked how many people don’t know it exists, by far my greatest resource
@@mapleearles6051Toys and table saws & drills? That's really cool! I'm in the US and I've not seen a library rent those things, but I think that's brilliant!
Goodwill /charity shops/marketplace etc for puzzles, jigsaws etc. Saves a fortune
This! it definitely depends on the quality of your library but many of them have so much great media for absolutely free, such an underutilized resource the library is so dope dude
I listen to 3-4 audiobooks a week with Libby/overdrive, which I can borrow for free with my library card, I can download them straight from the state library with an app.
My wife and I got married while still having debt. We cash flowed a backyard wedding (2021, so covid played a role). I smoked a bunch of meat leading up to the wedding, we got sides from the local BBQ place, we rented a tent, it was BYOB, and our friends said it was one of the most fun weddings they'd been to. The whole thing cost less than $10,000. Probably closer to $5,000.
Fellow 5k wedding here, and our friends said the same. We kept the guest list limited, the music playing and the bar open and everyone still talks about how fun it was. Smoking your own meats is genius wish we'd have thought to do that too.
@@VegasMilgausswhy did you answer yourself?
I did a backyard wedding as well, 2020 so COVID helped. We ordered a bunch of Chinese food and kept it small. Probably $500 spent since parents had a bunch of party supplies already and only real expenses was the food. And my best friend married us for free.
Good for you, smart move. 😊
My husband and I cash flowed our wedding and honeymoon. My hometown is cheap and we had a small wedding, like 40 people. We spent on the things we cared about, like photography and catering. It cost us about $12K, $17K including the honeymoon. And we all look back at that day fondly. We saved for about a year.
26:50 is exactly the logic that I used to have and the majority of Americans have, we are so miserable from working constantly and having no money that we spend what money we do have on little nonsense things and call that happiness. Thats why I love this show cause it paints a big picture!
YESYESANDYES
@@leroyj62 OK boomer
Dude this whole episode is a collection of my greatest fears especially the money burning wife or partner. I’ve been blessed enough to have been married to my wife for 10 years who helps me in everything. She keeps me healthy, happy, and helps me achieve my goals ever since we met 20 years ago as kids.
I'm glad for you man hope you guys go all the way happy
you can tell Caleb is a nice person. he rips into them then immediately apologizes afterwards for doing it. He does not feel comfortable making people feel bad!
Yep, it’s “tough love”. We all need it sometimes. Too many people just validate our bad choices and say stuff like “you’re just being you” or “it’s ok to treat yourself”. No. Sometimes good friends need to tell you painful truths.
I disagree. Lol. He pokes holes in people’s self-deception.
@@sarahuber8567some people are sensitive, so when he’s giving them this budget, it’s less likely they will make some bs up in their head and say “well he’s giving me this strict budget because he hates me and I can let up here and there” because he lets them know he’s not here to attack but to help.
Depends some deserve it and he doesn't apologize. These two are good people with her being childish but getting across
I'm 100% sure she's the one who pressured and convinced him to have a destination wedding & start this whole debt mess in the first place
For sure.
Caleb's uplifting pep-talk at the end made me cry!! Caleb, your words are sweet, wise, and very professional. What a gift you gave to this couple, and to everyone watching who can relate!! Thank you so much for spreading the word of financial literacy!!
Thank you so much!!
The common thread through a lot of these audits are people who "want the things that I want," even when they cannot afford them. Financial literacy is so important!!
Oh, to learn the difference between “want” and “need” is what is imperative for financial freedom. Learn the difference early folks.
She is just embarrassed for being called out on her prior decisions. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. They can definitely get through this. Thank you Caleb for your financial insight. ❤
Yes, positivity
It’s called being a man
@@dashawnrobinson1802yes positivity. That will help... Not.
There is EVERYTHING to be embarrassed about.
They are very cute couple, and im glad they are together. But I feel the man needs to be more of the captain of the ship. I think they can get through it. I’ve been broke with my husband before, small studio, cards for game night together and cheap wine or crash bandicoot on my old family playstation.dollar tree shopping. It was great times actually.
Choosing the right partner with similar goals and mindset is SO important.
Good for them for being on the show & trying to aim to be in a better situation.
They are definitely not on the same page, she keeps spending!
@@lindajohnson.😂😂😂
Exactly. First thing for me, you have student loans over 20K, undatable.
Idk why this episode made me cry, but i really felt for them. They both seem like sweet people. I really hope they are successful at this!
I wish this couple nothing but the best!!! ❤❤❤❤ you guys can do it!!!
He’s a D-head for not thanking you.
Wow, this was probably one of my top couples episode. The way Caleb spoke to her about the students loans after being so vulnerable on this show...just amazing. It was supportive, he was able to relate and talk about it in such a positive way and encouraged them to keep going to better themselves for their future family. This couple is at least honest and have started before they came onto the show. They acknowledge it and have goals, and knew the exact figures! I wish them the best of luck.
Caleb! Don't be self conscious about the high pitch. It's a staple part of your brand at this point and it's one of those small enjoyments we get that keep us coming back. Like mawmaw always said, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
💯
Yes, I love his high pitch lol
The best message Caleb offers is how draining and demoralizing it is when you are in your 60's and are struggling to live and you look back at all the money wasted 😢 on credit card spending when you were younger. If Caleb had been advising when I was in my 30's my life now would be much easier. I wish this couple the best of luck.😊
Yes this. Being mortal, frail, physically unable to do what you could before as you did before....a lot of young people naturally can't comprehend it. The expensive pleasures of youth have a direct cost on the ease of life later.
The fact that she's so comfortable saying all this is insane
Since I've started watching Caleb, I've managed to save 60% of my monthly income. No more useless spending, no more Amazon binge, greatly reduced my takeout/ordering food rate (I've started cooking fit recipes), and only strict spending.
By December I'll be able to boast a fully-funded reserve emergency fund, stock market investments and a tiny real estate investment as well. Thanks Caleb!
Growing savings gets addictive after you get a good amount. For me it did anyways.
Keep goin' 👊
Good shit dude,stay on it👍💯
I can't eat out anymore after cooking at home for years. The food sucks compared to what I can make for a fraction of the cost.
@@MC4TWT I only eat out what I can’t easily make myself. So my eating out literally alternates between Chinese and Chickfila. More cfa now that chinese is crazy expensive
40:11 "cause I like puzzles, too" awww. IDK but this was one of the sweetest things he could've said to show his support for his wife ❤
I can't understand the logic of working 80 hour to pay for activities that is "necessary" to cope with working 2 jobs.
But the IRS thank you for your contribution.
😂irs 😂😂😂😂
Because the therapy cost a couple hundred max, while the job earns them a lot more money. You're right, in a normal situation, it makes no sense, but if you're well over $100,000 in debt, it becomes a good trade off for a temporary solution to solve the issues
I know sad. 80 hours is a lot. 12 hours a day 7 days a week or 16 hours a day 5. Sometimes my work has these overtime requirements like this and I have no time for fun, likes it not possible. Eat, sleep, repeat
I have a lot of respect for the guests that come on and sit through these sessions. It's got to be embarrassing. The urge to defend yourself has to be nearly all consuming. Even more respect to people for fighting that urge and listen to the advice despite whether or not it is feasible/manageable for them.
You're doing an important service Caleb.
I grew up with my mom always in debt, everytime I asked for something she "didn't have the money" and is "drowning in debt" so I've always thought struggling financially is normal, until I started living on my own with a student job and man it's so easy not to be in debt, just don't buy things you can't afford. My roomate needed a pc for uni/gaming, he bought a gaming laptop for 1200€, I bought a used desktop for 200€ that I can game on, saved 1000€ comparatively. He bought a new bike for 700€, I bought an old one for 40€. His parents helped him so that's not really debt, but that's still a sign for financial irresponsibility.
Well done for not repeating the cycle. More power to you!
@iamspencerx. Congratulations for breaking the debt cycle. You are making good choices & building a great future for yourself & your future family👏
I wouldn't say financial irresponsibility if your room mate has the financial backing in the form of his parents. I purchased property while in university because I knew my parents were backing me in those decisions. Also can your laptop play games well? A gaming laptop is usually more expensive than just a daily driver laptop. It doesn't seem comparable?
I'm of the belief that as long as you're purchasing within your means and you're using these items extensively, it is a good investment to pay for better quality for longer lasting items.
@@persimmons5390 I got a desktop, not a laptop, and my desktop could run games better than his gaming laptop
Your roommate was purchasing within his means. It’s not financial irresponsibility
I'm 23...I just started my 401k! Thanks to Caleb for scaring me straight. I wish I knew about all this sooner. I'm learning a lot from these videos.
I started mine a few months ago but never cared to check until I watched his first episode a few days ago!! I ran to my account immediately. 🍻 cheers to financial freedom!
I'm glad you learned at 23 I learned at 30, but I'm more than happy you will start at a better advantage than me.
😮😮😮 at 23. Max it out every year. You'll be set before you retire.
I'm 45 and no 401k I do have to I. R. A account.
You'll be so thankful for it. I'm 41, and it's very reassuring when the only thing you have to do is a few mild tweaks here and there to make up a mild shortfall as opposed to complete overhaul of your lifestyle.
As a soon to be certified financial counselor the way you handled this couple was a Masterclass. You never shifter blame solely onto anyone, let them come to their own conclusions, and while your own counseling style is certainly more passionate than most. You still managed to stress the importance of cutting back on certain spending and while it seemed you were dragging the wife the husband realized he was also a big reason their debt was so deep. Great as always Mr. Hammer.
I cannot believe my husband and I are the same age as these people. How do people get themselves to such horrifying financial positions. This is wild. At our big age.
He made it p clear they got carried away in the wedding. I can understand it on his side and I dont think its bad to enjoy in the moment once in a while working together to pay it off latee but his wife never stopped and did not contribute to pay off until now
I really respect how Caleb handles these conversations. He knows when to dig in but also when to take his foot off the gas. It’s really compassionate and actually helps people. I hope this couple listens to him because they could be successful and have a better marriage in the long run.
Your pep talk at the end was so heartwarming. Your empathy shows so much. Im rooting for them and hope they pull through. Sending lots of kindness to them as a couple. The honeymoon phase flies quickly when youre in debt but you can do it!
That was a pretty good speech. . . .
This is the sweetest couple and I wish them every success. Ariel, I felt your tears! Please know that "future you" is going to be so thankful and proud of you for doing the hard thing. Both of you are there to support one another and you can do it. Please keep us updated. ❤❤❤
I agree. You can feel the love between them. I hope they're able to make the hard habit-changes in order to fix their spending/retirement.
I skipped starbucks today thank u caleb
As someone who only recently was able to wrap their head around my own financial situation; seeing this episode makes me realize how important being on the same page with my partner is.
Thank you Caleb!
More couple audits please! Fiancés, spouses, dating..
A lot of the people in the comments forget that the husband actually had a ton of debt and made a lot of mistakes too. They both probably had the exact same financial state of mind, but then decided to clean up after. The husband was faster to internalize it, but its obvious shes struggling with the mindset switch, which is valid. Its hard to rewrite that sort of thing.
Another thing is she makes most of the money, she works very hard too - 80 hours - so she is willing to work hard and make sacrifices, its this last step that she needs to take.
People should be more sympathetic. Its very hard not to be defensive when you're attacked so directly with a camera on you. I'd like to see anyone else not feel the urge to laugh to ease the tension and try to rationalize in that moment.
Nah she's garbo. No care or desire to fix anything. This isn't something it's OK to come around on eventually. She's educated enough she knows she's fucking them both and doesn't care.
It's the mindset though
"I buy things for my future"
Caleb asks to see the Amazon purchases
"No"
She doesn't take it serious and makes bs justifications. Sure they both made bad choices but they have very different mindsets about the situation
Excuses she's an adult not a child act like one it's called discipline find some.
The husband said he brought her on the show so someone else can tell her what she’s doing wrong. She probably felt ganged up on. In my opinion I think she would benefit from some therapy to work on impulse management because once she masters that she’ll be golden
This one little talk will not help her. She's addicted to spending the money and does not care about her future.
47:40 she’s thinking x-Ray techs don’t deal with vomit, but that would be a huge mistake to assume that…
This interview is an excellent demonstration on how instant gratification is addictive and such an easyhabit to slip into. It’s insidious. I hope this lovely couple manage to stick to the plan and avoid taking on new debt.
She said "ecommerce" and my mind immediately went to "dropship". I was a sucker for those kind of courses a few years back. Lesson: You have to absolutely be on top of your personal finances before becoming a CFO of your own brand. It will reflect.
I can't believe she paid 10k for 2 dropshipping courses. You can learn everything you need on YT for free
She doesn't sound like she thinks ANYTHING through. Instant gratification and no critical thinking skills, never mind financial skills.
Thank you for being vulnerable and putting your information out for us to see. It’s very inspiring and I hope you two succeed and we all get to see you back on the show to celebrate your progress!
"I want to enjoy the money I make".... ah, you already enjoyed the money before you even made it, that's why you are in debt.
Your videos have always been of great help. The fact that you convey these truly daunting concepts so simply has helped me improve my financial skills and I can't thank you enough.
The thought of retirement has given me the opportunity to sort out another source of earning
I started paying more attention to stock and learning more about online trades
It all became interesting when I met Shanita online and she gradually exposed me to the whole trading market and how to earn massively from it
I was introduced to forex with the guidance of Mrs Creswell and there isn’t a single trade I have loosed
That is why I had to start forex trading 2months ago and I now am making benefits from it..
This makes me thankful that I had the money talk with my soon to be fiancé. While she may be in debt she has a great budget and is busting her butt to pay it off and will be done in like 6 months. So proud of her and us being on the same page. Have those conversations with your partners people!
How tf did you find a wifey these days my guy
@@joshdh46yes it’s possible! 😂😂 gotta have these conversations FIRST in order to be able to determine that.
@@joshdh46I wanna know how u find a hubby these days 😂😂😂2023 dating is ROUGH hahahaha
Open yourself up to finding someone via yt comments ....
😉
my husband and I are both lunatics with no empathy (I'm schizoid, he's got ASPD) so dating was hard already, but then dealing with morons who cannot function without shooting dollar bills out their butts drove us both up a wall. We found each other by chance and being with someone on the same page as you money wise is such a blessing lmfao. No debt here. I spanged my ass off when I was homeless to afford school and saved up 5k sewn into my gd clothes, bought a car in cash, I turned into a total miser. I got dinner out of starbucks dumpsters and I'll be happy never eating a cold panini again in this lifetime. His mom worked at a college so he got a free ride and now that degree pays for everything, I take care of our farm and every household duty, and trade labor for labor. (I just tilled someone's plot in exchange for gutter installation, as an example.) It's the LIFE. He works from home, comes to hang out with me and the chickens on his work laptop -- put a router in the barn so he can take calls in the fields. It's so comfy. Put your needs first, idc how mean you are about it, your dates aren't going to make a club around your bad attitude and even if they do WHO CARES. Find someone on your page, or else you'll be adding divorce lawyer debt on top of your load.
also date for at least 5 years, we went for ten but we're not the norm idk how normie dating works but you guys get hitched way too quick. All those love chemicals blind you or something. Put infatuation out of your reasoning and look at your partner objectively as a person or business partner and make your decisions that way. THEN you can be madly in love and all that gross stuff.
It’s fascinating how people making that much money, and working that hard, can spend their money that easily.
rooting for you, Ariel and David! yall got this!!
Big shout out to this couple for putting selves out there. I watch so many of these videos, but this was the only one that resonated with me and actually received some takeaways. To the wife, do not beat yourself up about many of us have or are in the same boat including myself and you and your husband was brave enough to make efforts for change
Fully agreed 😊😊😊
can we talk about how this couple represents most of us with money, remember the loud minority of the people who are watching videos like this are probably more financially savvy or farther in their journey of being better with money - I have so much hope for this couple, I wish the best for them!!!
She knew what she was getting into. You told her the truth. She has a soft heart (which is a beautiful thing). And working 80 hours, which is rough. I would have reacted the same way. All the best to them. I hope they are able to do it and get out from under this.
Car culture in the States is crazy. Sounds like this couple could make do with 1 vehicle which would get rid of those massive car payments and the 10k loan that was budgeted for as the downgrade car purchase.
The problem is, in the US many towns and aome cities you have to use a car to get around and the uk you don't unless in the countryside. There is hardly any paths to cross roads so it hard in US not to have a car