Is Attachment Theory Overrated?
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- In this episode Chris discusses attachment theory vs. resiliency. Now more than ever, the critical importance of parent-child attachment is being emphasized. The fact is that there’s no strong evidence for parent-child attachment in infancy predicting anything much about children’s later development. Join Chris as he examines recent research around attachment theory and its claims, and where the focus should be directed, on resilience.
Link to mentioned article: thepsychologis...
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Attachment theory is too generalized. Avoidant attachment sounds like 95 percent of men. They don’t include societal influence etc.
Great video! Good to see a fellow GSEP alum on RUclips!
Thanks John!
Hello Chris, few things come to my mind as I watch your video: 1) you totally misrepresented Booth-LaForce et al paper on attachment, not talking about misrepresenting what this paper suggests as a result 2) you completely misrepresented concept of attachment, partly, because secure attachment promotes resiliency whereas insecure anxious attachment is much more associated with helicopter parenting 3) one article even if it was about what you are talking it was about, cant disqualify the whole body of attachment research that is scientifically very solid by a highest standards in social sciences 4) there has never been an approach in psychotherapy that would be more gentle to mothers than attachment based practice 5) and yes it has its limitations as any theory has, because it focuses on important but developmentally limited aspect of child's life, but it does not mean its not working for what it should be working.
How can there be several billion people on Earth and only like 4 'attachment styles'. It's comical. You cannot be secure in something that is fundamentally insecure. Let's start there.
Thanks for this video! It's the much needed drop of skepticism in the ocean of praise and approval of the AT. I don't have any background in psychology but I don't see how AT can be an evidence-based or scientific concept. Taking the entire human population and putting it into four narrowly defined boxes is about as accurate as trying to build a modern theory of the universe using the Bible. The attachment theory seems to be considered a silver bullet in psychology and offers an oversimplified model of human development and behavior and ignores many other influential factors like cultural and social background, relationships with other family members and peers or early romance. It's about time to leave this theory in the past, but apparently the psychology community is very conservative about it and even in this very comment section the pushback and peer pressure are remarkable.
I found Attachment Theory [AT]as a fifty something guy who has never been able to fully commit and surrender to a relationship. I noticed AT is doing a healthy business on RUclips for relationships coaching. A lot of it is gimmicky and spammy ( i.e. 10 ways to spot the 4 types of x or y and 6 things you should know, and 3 ways to respond etc...) but I figured that is how it goes ....but ultimately the whole thing makes me feel more hopeless. It makes psychology period, and self-help period seem gimmicky and suspect...in fact mental health in general ....What are the options? Find a guru? Religion? A bottle of red wine? I am damn sure something is up with me but AT may be another blind ally click bait trap.
Thank you for pointing out the “mother-shaming” in psychology. It is rampant. It takes a village. Moms have fewer and fewer support systems in our increasing disconnected world, while at the same time are bombarded with all the ad imagery and “phycological facts” that nothing they do is good enough and all of their natural instincts are wrong. Then add to that how every mother is now expected to rise to impossible standards in how they parent, what activities they do with their kids, if they breastfed, how they put together their bedrooms, the list goes on. society has become so narcissistic that people see your child’s behavior as a reflection of your worth as a mother. It’s disgusting and disgraceful that this has happened to mothers.
I had a feeling AT was basically nonsense. I've felt anxious in relationships before and thought oh is this because I have an 'anxious attachment style' but no, it's because the person i was with was not treating me right, as I've also felt completely secure in other relationships. This to me shows it's just a normal reaction to bad behaviour and pretty much anyone else would react in the same way, It completely depends on the person and how they are treating you.
feeling anxious and having anxious attachment style are two completely different things. anxiety is a normal reaction to bad behavior on a partners side. anxious attachment means being on alert for rejection and abandonment and becoming clingy and protesting even when there are no real danger signals, but perhaps some vague situation or miscommunication.
@@heavestlus8764 Ah yes, I see thank you!
Thank you for giving the locus of control back to the individual and calling out the propagation of sexism through the practice of mother blame.
Attachment is a mix of nurture and nature.
Which is why one sibling ends up avoidant and the other anxious.
How do you develop resilience in the first place? Does it just magically instilled in you when the time comes that you need it? Surprise surprise the answer is no. Secure attachment plays a big role for skills like resilience
This should be as important, trainings in schools (and to teachers) as sexual information, and before having children, in every coming family. And to every therapist, who works with some sort of coaching, at all. Both parents, are important, to learn relationships, and communication on feelings, emotions and real relating-skills.
Great video!
Hi Dr. Hoff--what book/resource/stance would you recommend for couples work? Thanks!
Well all those statements that lady made were true but they don't actually debunk attachment theory. They only debunk this poor, unexplored understanding of attachment theory. Attachment theory has developed to become quite nuanced and with all due respect, I don't think you represented it very accurately in this video.
I do, however think that you accurately represented the way attachment theory is presented and posed onto new parents, and I thank you for bringing it up. We put a ridiculous pressure on new parents these days, and personally I think parents would do well to understand the nuances of attachment theory and not believe the idea that it all develops in the first 2 years of your life. Your attachment style changes throughout the course of your life and there are many many different causes and ways it can present. The categories are just to organize the information. If people hear 2 sentences and reject the information, refusing to look into it further, thats not very helpful.
Such a powerful video! Bringing up some dynamic ideas!
Thanks for the support Beth!
@@TheRadicalTherapist are there any critiques of Bowlby? Or any theorists?
I’m new to this - I can’t seem to find the article you are referring to - please help
thank you
Hi Jennifer! Here's the link: thepsychologist.bps.org.uk/volume-30/january-2017/overrated-predictive-power-attachment
Interesting but I find it disturbing to dismiss attachment theory as there is also evidence for that. For example-it's so common that a child who was abandoned by a parent becomes anxiously attached - just in life with people that I know. It's also basic logic. I will check out the link below but I'm shocked by the dismissal of this useful theory. On a personal level, learning about attachment theory was life-changing for me , reduced shame, and ultimately led me to have healthier relationships. So I strongly disagree that attachment theory is anything but helpful.
nadialees I am glad you have found the ideas around attachment theory helpful and I am not dismissing it. Just looking at it, and the surrounding therapeutic marketplace, with a critical eye. I would however be careful about your assumptions. You might find this worthwhile: podcasts.google.com/?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vc2NpZW5jZXZz&episode=ZDZkY2RkMTQtNGRjYS0xMWU2LTgxZWItNGJkMDYwNjBkYmM1&hl=en&ved=2ahUKEwiY_ceN9dvnAhVdJjQIHelbBHcQjrkEegQIBBAE&ep=6
The Radical Therapist attachment parenting is a total misunderstanding of attachment theory. greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/why_attachment_parenting_is_not_the_same_as_secure_attachment
You seem to be misunderstanding the current understanding of attachment theory and adult attachment. It’s not all about the mother/child dyad, and attachment styles can change through time, and are dynamic among relationships. Seems like you are criticizing an outdated thinking about attachment theory.
I love the rest of your content, so this video is disappointing.
The Radical Therapist I just want to add that if people are thinking that the mother/child dyad is the beginning and the end of attachment, that should be criticized for it’s western centric and patriarchal implications, but also because it doesn’t fit into the modern thinking and research about attachment.
Can you spell Dr. Elizabeth’s last name?
Seriously, your opening reveals your orientation...extremism...reactionary...and then to completely disregard and discard the science of Attachment Theory in favor of Resiliency reveals another character flaw...Either/Or thinking...anyone can see both are critical components of parenting at different stages...Your politics are driving your public persona instead of your science.
Hi Kean- Thanks for watching and the comment. You are correct. This is RUclips so there is certainly some "Persona" involved. In this video I'm not "completely disregarding" the science of attachment theory. I am actually doing the scientific thing and challenging that science by presenting other science. And making the case for resiliency, via science. You are also correct, politics are involved. As they are for you as well, judging by your attack of me rather than the science.. And finally I would like to think that I am trying to make the case for a both/and rather than an either/or, where we seem to be currently. I encourage you to explore the science I referenced. I would also encourage you to explore the science of Dr. Deena Weisberg from Yale/UPenn and her work around explanations with logically irrelevant neuroscience information were found to be more satisfying than explanations without. Again thanks for watching.
I am a survivor of attachment therapy. I was a ward of the state of Washington for 16 years. I was diagnosed RAD at 6 and was in therapy until I finally escaped by running away at the age of 14. They used forced restraint, food control, physical and verbal abuse, sleep deprivation, forced indoctrination, confusion, isolation along with many other barbaric techniques. When I turned 17 I had a child and they took her even against psychiatrist recommendation. They also took the child I had a year and a half later. I did have another child many years later and was able to fight them and won when they tried to take her too. I was also deprived of an education or any future planning and removed at 18 from my ward status with nothing. While I had mental issues the way to help me form attachment or to teach me how to trust was not to spend the whole of my childhood terrorizing me on every level they could think possible. This diagnosis is an excuse for sadistic therapist to torture/break children and traffic them . It has taken me most of my natural life to try heal what they did to me in the name of mental health. I found out recently that this method is still wildly practiced and I want to find a way to stop it. There have been deaths from this practice as recently as 2020. Today I am 42 and I still struggle but I am a survivor. I would be happy to talk to someone about my story as I have a pretty extensive case history and was one of the first on my state. My case set presidence for how these cases are delt with in Washington state today.