I’m still grieving the loss of my health, my job, my home, my relationships, my resources, my autonomy, my everything. I’ve tried and am still trying every possible healing protocol out there. Too many dark nights of the soul. Water damaged buildings with toxic mold and bacteria was eventually found out to be the culprit behind all my symptoms so please be careful everyone bc I don’t want anyone to go through decades of debilitating illness. If there is anyone out there looking to volunteer their time to help me with their psychic or healing gifts, please please reach out. I would do anything to heal and would be forever grateful. 🙏♥️
Having grown up in a dysfunctional household (alcoholic father, over emotional / overly compensating mother), I felt a lot of love but at the same time a lot of unsafety. I feel a lot of confusion about this dichotomy as an adult. My younger sister then took her life in her early twenties, a few years ago. I didn’t feel entitled to use the word “trauma” to describe my experience as tbh, it felt melodramatic. But I’m learning that I’ve been through some traumatic and very chaotic things in my life which I haven’t dealt with (just starting to admit I’ve avoided my feelings as a defence/ self preservation). I’ve been reading Alex’s book ‘it’s not your fault’ and I’m grateful for the ways in which it has taught me to be kinder and more accepting towards my feelings. I’m slowly giving them a safe place to go to be digested by my emotional body. I have a long road ahead of me but I’m grateful for the guidance Alex doesn’t even know he’s given me! Keep going everyone x
Hi Alex , this film that talk about the four concepts of trauma. I would like to ask which of your books mentioned about the four concepts? (Event , Context , Homeostatic Balance and Outcomes) Thanks！
Hi Andrea, just saw your comment on trauma in people on the Autistic spectrum. I am a counsellor who recently discovered I am on the spectrum. I’m fascinated by the link between trauma and autism, and how autism is an evolutionary trait designed for increasing our ability to successfully survive. If you feel like a conversation on this, please feel free to respond to this comment and we can set something up. Thanks Matthew
I’m so glad you asked this question, it would be so useful to explore the link between having autism/adhd and trauma, as I feel it’s not recognised or understood but very much present.
@@anitawatkins3082 My understanding (and I've just self-diagnosed at 73) is that us neuro-divergents live with fairly high levels of anxiety from day 1, sensing that majority neurotypicals can suss out our differences in a crowd, and can come down hard on them. Result: lasting friendships can be hard to come by, community even harder. We only get a sense of those dynamics after we've been diagnosed, and only relative to how neurotypicals present. Basically we're taking on twice the load in trying to figure out how to fit in, which is why ours is sometimes called "the other planet syndrome". I can attest to all of the above. All my elderly health issues have their beginnings in the stress of not ever quite fitting in.... being the perpetual outsider. And I've had loads of counselling in my life, most of which was aimed at trying to fix me.... make me 'normal'. Ha!!
@@mthawke I love your suggestion. I wish I could take it on right now, but I'm swamped with so many things at the moment. I can suggest this video by Paul Micallef who I follow a lot. It might offer some starting points for you. ruclips.net/video/OvZVOlVnQW0/видео.html Andrea
@@andreabuntpercy yes absolutely. Being autistic is invariably traumatic because of the difficulty of living in a society that is not built for us. And that is without even taking into account any abuse or neglect that we may have experienced as children. There are very few autistics who do not suffer with CPTSD, but some do exist and they are able to thrive because they have been raised in supportive environments where they are seen and understood and their access needs are met.
@@AlexHowardTherapy Thanks. I agree they are needs, and having them makes us feel more comfortable, just would not define them as emotional. A pizza under a blanket next to a fire feels good, but is not an emotion. Safety is not an emotion. Fear and calm are, but they come from being in a safe place. How would you explain that having boundaries is an emotion? I think we already mix things like thinking and feeling together too much and it just causes confusion to not delineate more clearly. "I feel like you don't like me", for example. I see an emotional need as an emotion we need, rather than needs that will help us emotionally, I guess.
I’m still grieving the loss of my health, my job, my home, my relationships, my resources, my autonomy, my everything. I’ve tried and am still trying every possible healing protocol out there. Too many dark nights of the soul. Water damaged buildings with toxic mold and bacteria was eventually found out to be the culprit behind all my symptoms so please be careful everyone bc I don’t want anyone to go through decades of debilitating illness. If there is anyone out there looking to volunteer their time to help me with their psychic or healing gifts, please please reach out. I would do anything to heal and would be forever grateful. 🙏♥️
Having grown up in a dysfunctional household (alcoholic father, over emotional / overly compensating mother), I felt a lot of love but at the same time a lot of unsafety. I feel a lot of confusion about this dichotomy as an adult. My younger sister then took her life in her early twenties, a few years ago. I didn’t feel entitled to use the word “trauma” to describe my experience as tbh, it felt melodramatic. But I’m learning that I’ve been through some traumatic and very chaotic things in my life which I haven’t dealt with (just starting to admit I’ve avoided my feelings as a defence/ self preservation). I’ve been reading Alex’s book ‘it’s not your fault’ and I’m grateful for the ways in which it has taught me to be kinder and more accepting towards my feelings. I’m slowly giving them a safe place to go to be digested by my emotional body. I have a long road ahead of me but I’m grateful for the guidance Alex doesn’t even know he’s given me! Keep going everyone x
Thank you Alex, great intro to your video class and to your Approach on Trauma. Will participate.
Excellent
Thanks!
Hi Alex , this film that talk about the four concepts of trauma. I would like to ask which of your books mentioned about the four concepts? (Event , Context , Homeostatic Balance and Outcomes) Thanks！
Did you read "Trauma and the Soul" by Kalshed, Alex? It is a remarkable read on the topic.
Will take a look...
I've signed up! Will we still get access to the videos after the 5 days?
Alex, have you ever spoken about trauma inherent in people who are on the autism spectrum?
Hi Andrea, just saw your comment on trauma in people on the Autistic spectrum. I am a counsellor who recently discovered I am on the spectrum. I’m fascinated by the link between trauma and autism, and how autism is an evolutionary trait designed for increasing our ability to successfully survive. If you feel like a conversation on this, please feel free to respond to this comment and we can set something up. Thanks Matthew
I’m so glad you asked this question, it would be so useful to explore the link between having autism/adhd and trauma, as I feel it’s not recognised or understood but very much present.
@@anitawatkins3082 My understanding (and I've just self-diagnosed at 73) is that us neuro-divergents live with fairly high levels of anxiety from day 1, sensing that majority neurotypicals can suss out our differences in a crowd, and can come down hard on them. Result: lasting friendships can be hard to come by, community even harder. We only get a sense of those dynamics after we've been diagnosed, and only relative to how neurotypicals present. Basically we're taking on twice the load in trying to figure out how to fit in, which is why ours is sometimes called "the other planet syndrome". I can attest to all of the above. All my elderly health issues have their beginnings in the stress of not ever quite fitting in.... being the perpetual outsider. And I've had loads of counselling in my life, most of which was aimed at trying to fix me.... make me 'normal'. Ha!!
@@mthawke I love your suggestion. I wish I could take it on right now, but I'm swamped with so many things at the moment. I can suggest this video by Paul Micallef who I follow a lot. It might offer some starting points for you. ruclips.net/video/OvZVOlVnQW0/видео.html Andrea
@@andreabuntpercy yes absolutely. Being autistic is invariably traumatic because of the difficulty of living in a society that is not built for us. And that is without even taking into account any abuse or neglect that we may have experienced as children. There are very few autistics who do not suffer with CPTSD, but some do exist and they are able to thrive because they have been raised in supportive environments where they are seen and understood and their access needs are met.
Website is not working.
You need to add www. so www.decodeyourtrauma.com 🙂
@@AlexHowardTherapy Thank you! Done and done :)
Good, but safety and boundaries are not emotions.
No, they are emotional needs - ie key ingredients for healthy functioning of our emotional body 🙂
@@AlexHowardTherapy Thanks. I agree they are needs, and having them makes us feel more comfortable, just would not define them as emotional. A pizza under a blanket next to a fire feels good, but is not an emotion. Safety is not an emotion. Fear and calm are, but they come from being in a safe place. How would you explain that having boundaries is an emotion? I think we already mix things like thinking and feeling together too much and it just causes confusion to not delineate more clearly. "I feel like you don't like me", for example. I see an emotional need as an emotion we need, rather than needs that will help us emotionally, I guess.
I might have trauma but it's more like a social disease.