What's The Weirdest Story You've Heard From A Tourist Guide? | Mock The Week

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  • Опубликовано: 17 сен 2020
  • We're sure most of you have heard "unlikely stories" from your tourist guide while travelling, but our comedians will bring you the BEST ones so far!
    #MockTheWeek #TouristGuide #StewardFrancis #HollyWalsh
    Series 07, Episode 9.
    Watch the funniest Mock The Week moments here! We're uploading your favourite Mock The Week clips featuring Milton Jones, Romesh Ranganathan, Stewart Francis, Hugh Dennis and more every week, hosted by Dara O'Briain.
    Mock the Week is a British topical, satirical celebrity panel show, that was created by Dan Patterson and Mark Leveson.
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Комментарии • 116

  • @Kikiclark42
    @Kikiclark42 3 года назад +74

    Hugh Dennis is so funny to me.
    The thought of the day caught me off guard, very good.

  • @markorollo.
    @markorollo. 3 года назад +10

    speaking as a wheelchair user, Hughs disabled access joke is still pretty accurate more often than it should be in the 21st century, i thought we were supposed to have things that could hover us up steps by now.....

  • @Jedi_Spartan_38
    @Jedi_Spartan_38 3 года назад +171

    1:08 "Gun beats spear" that pretty much sums up the history of the British Empire.

    • @chrishicks7946
      @chrishicks7946 3 года назад +4

      Shame we just bend over n take it now..

    • @alexanderbrown8921
      @alexanderbrown8921 3 года назад +4

      @@chrishicks7946 You lost your only advantage. Everyone else has guns now too. It's a bit hard for you to take the Empire high ground these days when the rest of us can shoot you down from below.

    • @lavrentivs9891
      @lavrentivs9891 3 года назад +5

      @@chrishicks7946 That's what you get for screwing up the Middle East with the Sykes-Picot treaty.

    • @weswheel4834
      @weswheel4834 3 года назад +13

      @@chrishicks7946 I love that. "Yes, we do have a massive room filled with expensive stuff based on gun-beats-spear. But we're still going to play the victim."?

    • @TheScruph
      @TheScruph 3 года назад

      And?

  • @michaelscott6022
    @michaelscott6022 3 года назад +82

    "...I kicked an armadillo."
    (This is from a bit Dara did as a standup routine about the weirdest things people have done while on holiday.)

    • @chrishicks7946
      @chrishicks7946 3 года назад

      Did he break his toe?

    • @michaelscott6022
      @michaelscott6022 3 года назад +2

      @@chrishicks7946 Dunno. He was talking about a guy who went on holiday and got startled when an armadillo walked out of the bushes in front of him. He panicked and hoofed it like a football clear over a tree.

    • @cameronbooth2176
      @cameronbooth2176 3 года назад

      thanks for letting us know

    • @decodolly1535
      @decodolly1535 3 года назад

      @@michaelscott6022 Dara tells it better.

    • @jamesl8640
      @jamesl8640 3 года назад +1

      @@michaelscott6022 "this is a bad day for me"

  • @jamesl8640
    @jamesl8640 3 года назад +32

    Isn't that the same jacket Ed was wearing where he worried he'd turned invisible?

    • @jamesl8640
      @jamesl8640 3 года назад

      @Tee Carrat just a question
      Wasn't making a groundbreaking point

    • @jamesl8640
      @jamesl8640 3 года назад +1

      @Tee Carrat it was a question sir, why get so irate about it?

    • @masterdon187
      @masterdon187 2 года назад

      @Tee Carrat someone had dog piss for their breakfast that day

  • @Loosehead
    @Loosehead 3 года назад +15

    No Jack, he doesn't want to shake your hand.

  • @exessex3522
    @exessex3522 3 года назад +32

    2:29 We were in a cave on a field trip once when our instructor/guide did exactly this for a laugh*. He was taunting us from somewhere up above in the dark. Me and my phlegmatic mate Chris plonked ourselves down on a rock to wait. We'd worked out that he probably wasn't going to leave us there to die. Some of the group really freaked out though. *He demanded no money, I should add.

  • @serpenthydra
    @serpenthydra 3 года назад +133

    Frankie needs to come back for a one-off, 'I survived the pandemic' special!

    • @FleX_94
      @FleX_94 3 года назад +3

      Won't happen, he's banned from live TV 😂

    • @Loosehead
      @Loosehead 3 года назад +4

      The marxist bastard has his own show now.

    • @FleX_94
      @FleX_94 3 года назад +1

      @The Goblin Queen Elizabeth he's banned from TV.

    • @EjvindGEMDark
      @EjvindGEMDark 3 года назад +3

      @@Loosehead You mean "center left" hardly a fuckin Marxist.
      He's a legend though.

    • @fingersTitan
      @fingersTitan 3 года назад +1

      Only Huge left now with the unfunny barrel scraped dregs...

  • @EuanFoulis
    @EuanFoulis 3 года назад +27

    That Dundee joke is so accurate

  • @a7xdude87
    @a7xdude87 3 года назад +11

    Last one caught me off guard and I burst out laughing. Forget how much better it was with Frankie on the show

  • @stestewart1119
    @stestewart1119 3 года назад +6

    Did anyone tell Jack Whitehall the M11 doesn't go anywhere near Middlesbrough 😂 😂 😂

    • @biggusdickkus2956
      @biggusdickkus2956 2 года назад

      Yeah but better off not taking any road near the Boro, l live 12 miles away and it's been twinned with Hades

  • @jenniferjones3273
    @jenniferjones3273 3 года назад +2

    My dream! Ed Byrne AND Russell Howard! Laughing and drooling here.

  • @beeble2003
    @beeble2003 3 года назад +103

    "If you're on the M11 heading towards Middlesbrough, you should turn around because..." you're completely lost. No part of the M11 is within 200 miles of Middlesbrough.

    • @DavidOakesMusic
      @DavidOakesMusic 3 года назад +13

      Also i can't bear the tired " lol - literally any town I mention = shit hole " and everyone in the audience laughs. I can do that now... LOL don't ever go to Tilehurst LOL AMIRITEEEE

    • @OpreRoma
      @OpreRoma 3 года назад +12

      @@DavidOakesMusic HEY! I've bought some *very* good drugs in Tilehurst!

    • @DavidOakesMusic
      @DavidOakesMusic 3 года назад +4

      @@OpreRoma They have a WAITROSE.

    • @andrewhoneywell5244
      @andrewhoneywell5244 3 года назад +1

      Not quite as funny if you say A19.

    • @northernninjarunner5506
      @northernninjarunner5506 3 года назад +1

      Up The Boro

  • @SidneyBroadshead
    @SidneyBroadshead 3 года назад +12

    *Mock the Week* (S7, Ep10; September 10, 2009)
    *_Scenes We'd Like to See_*
    Presenter: Dara O'Briain
    Team 1: Andy Parsons (captain), Ed Byrne, Russell Howard
    Team 2: Frankie Boyle, Hugh Dennis (captain), Jack Whitehall

  • @alexbenavidez4500
    @alexbenavidez4500 3 года назад +4

    1:57 I was trying to eat and I choked on my fucking chicken.

  • @dj_james170
    @dj_james170 3 года назад +6

    Franckie’s morning after pill joke is one of my favourite

  • @DemxnTheyThem
    @DemxnTheyThem 2 года назад +1

    I be concerned just by a tour guide telling me we're getting to Venic by BUS, Ed.

    • @VinnySlouth
      @VinnySlouth Год назад

      I believe it is possible to drive from Scotland to Cape Town SA, might need to use a ferry at some point but Venice is also a possibility.

  • @VinnySlouth
    @VinnySlouth Год назад

    0:42 I had freshman orientation the day after a major car accident, stiff sore and with a c-collar I went on a campus TOUR with THAT tour guide.

  • @professorbaxtercarelessdre1075
    @professorbaxtercarelessdre1075 3 года назад +10

    Frankie and Hugh really steamroll through their own jokes without much allowance for the others to have a go :(

    • @fingersTitan
      @fingersTitan 3 года назад +3

      We only tuned in for Frankie and Huge.
      Only Huge left now with the unfunny barrel scraped dregs...

    • @professorbaxtercarelessdre1075
      @professorbaxtercarelessdre1075 3 года назад +1

      @@fingersTitan yeah, its why i stopped watching it. i've always preferred Q.I. and WILTY?! anyway :D

  • @ckyisyourfuture
    @ckyisyourfuture 3 года назад +7

    the amount of times jack tried to walk up before he did was hard to watch

  • @ThisIsAitch
    @ThisIsAitch 3 года назад +82

    Those were the days, with good old couldn't-give-a-shit Frankie

    • @sheilaghbrosky
      @sheilaghbrosky 3 года назад +5

      Thank goodness he's gone! Not even close to funny!

    • @DomWeasel
      @DomWeasel 3 года назад +10

      This is before he got fed up and stuck to three punchlines; HIV/Aids, bestiality and paedophilia. When you watch episodes back to back, each comedian's shtick becomes painfully repetitive.

    • @DavidOakesMusic
      @DavidOakesMusic 3 года назад +12

      @@sheilaghbrosky He very occasionally had an absolute belter - but most of the time he was too predictable with his paedophile jokes.

    • @guyincognito5663
      @guyincognito5663 3 года назад +6

      Frankie never gets old.

    • @pjmbidge632000
      @pjmbidge632000 3 года назад +8

      The poor deluded fools who just don't get Frankie!

  • @rnalonto
    @rnalonto 3 года назад +5

    GOOOOOD MORNING, MILLWALL!!!!!

  • @DavidOakesMusic
    @DavidOakesMusic 3 года назад +10

    Seriously Jack ? A [insert literally any town] is a shithole joke ?

  • @wigglemd
    @wigglemd 10 месяцев назад

    5.22 Agree

  • @DavidOakesMusic
    @DavidOakesMusic 3 года назад +3

    WTF is Jack Whitehalls hair

  • @Jedi_Spartan_38
    @Jedi_Spartan_38 3 года назад +11

    Finally some Russell Howard clips!

  • @AuntieWelly
    @AuntieWelly 3 года назад +5

    Radio Tourettes - yes!

  • @trapbandicoot7877
    @trapbandicoot7877 3 года назад +1

    The fucking Vanessa phelps had me finished. The red bull one too 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @aneesarehman611
    @aneesarehman611 3 года назад +6

    I ate weetabix this morning

    • @andrewcarson5850
      @andrewcarson5850 3 года назад

      How many?

    • @aneesarehman611
      @aneesarehman611 3 года назад +1

      @@andrewcarson5850 2 👀

    • @andrewcarson5850
      @andrewcarson5850 3 года назад

      @@aneesarehman611 with milk and sugar?

    • @aneesarehman611
      @aneesarehman611 3 года назад

      @@andrewcarson5850 milk and one teaspoon of sugar. Did I pass the test?

    • @andrewcarson5850
      @andrewcarson5850 3 года назад +1

      @@aneesarehman611 Yup, full marks. In my heathen youth I would pile the sugar high, nowadays just a single-spoon-sprinkling suffices.

  • @timwhite9255
    @timwhite9255 3 года назад +3

    Any word on a new series in 2020?

  • @thor654
    @thor654 3 года назад +5

    Did anyone else get an advert for de-funding the BBC before the video

    • @AuntieWelly
      @AuntieWelly 3 года назад +3

      No, because I use an adblocker

    • @andrewhoneywell5244
      @andrewhoneywell5244 3 года назад

      Maybe that's the answer the BBC funding problem, they need to remove their ad blocker.

  • @Katharsis540
    @Katharsis540 3 года назад +1

    Frankie very hardcore aggressive.

  • @MostCommentsAreFake-ud8by
    @MostCommentsAreFake-ud8by 3 года назад +1

    Superb. Women do add a different perspective so different jokes.

  • @jordanferrazza8700
    @jordanferrazza8700 3 года назад +3

    I wish Foxtel had this show.

    • @zomfies
      @zomfies 3 года назад +2

      It's on the ABC, isn't it? Maybe not now, given how long it's been since it last aired.

  • @kinsmed
    @kinsmed 3 года назад +14

    My favorite was by the white guy.

    • @OP-1000
      @OP-1000 3 года назад +8

      The British one?

    • @loz5190
      @loz5190 3 года назад +2

      The one that was funny?

    • @silvasilvasilva
      @silvasilvasilva 3 года назад +3

      I agree, best of all.

  • @williamcrowe2576
    @williamcrowe2576 2 года назад +1

    "For the next few days, we suggest you turn off all mobile devices as the locals refuse to believe they exist. Otherwise, enjoy your vacation in Amish Country".

  • @davewall4356
    @davewall4356 3 года назад

    *u

  • @just-tess
    @just-tess 2 месяца назад

    oh I get it, the people who moan about missing Frankie think nothing's funny unless it's racist or sexist or both

  • @kevied88
    @kevied88 3 года назад +3

    another 1 with frankie. 2 in the same week. oyf. running out of material. r we mtw.

  •  3 года назад +1

    3:15 I guess this is very much out-of-date these days. Sorry pal, you just lost it.

  •  3 года назад +2

    Overall good jokes but some guys should reconsider their place in the current world. Do their jokes pass even the most relaxed political corridor of thoughts? (Which is the best I could come up with as a non-English native tongue.)

    • @johnnychin
      @johnnychin 3 года назад +2

      I think you don't realise that this is recorded and aired ages ago. It's from Mock The Week Series 7 which was aired in 2009. Despite that, I do find most of their jokes still fine. Comedians that play too safe are usually the ones that are boring to watch.

    • @daftirishmarej1827
      @daftirishmarej1827 3 года назад

      The answer to your query can basically be summed up by any episode of Mock The Week. Ever...

    • @davesmith9325
      @davesmith9325 3 года назад +3

      One thing about being politically correct is that .. It simply isn't funny. Indeed recently it seems the joke has become that political correctness has lost touch with reality.

    • @teemusid
      @teemusid 3 года назад +1

      @@davesmith9325 Well, the funniest set I've ever seen at a live comedy show was also the cleanest and least offensive. Funnier than either time I saw Robin Williams.

    • @ianghose1
      @ianghose1 3 года назад +3

      And I thought we were all grown up adults and could use our judgement to decide what to watch and what not to, realizing that no one is forcing us to watch or hear any of this.
      How wrong was I!

  • @fingersTitan
    @fingersTitan 3 года назад

    We only tuned in for Frankie and Huge.
    Only Huge left now with the unfunny barrel scraped dregs...