Hearing they tried to gather change to stop an argument made me tear up. I don't know how someone could laugh about that. The other parents are absolutely horrified by what was said!
Here's a funny anecdote about my practice kid's traumatic core memory that paints me terribly. Isn't it hilarious? Veronica, you look pale. Shall I open another bottle of rose?
If they were good people I have a feeling they did. If that is also the case Im sure they were also weirded out by her serving alcohol to a four year olds birthday. Im betting OP has a lot of shirts or coasters referring herself as a wine mom
Story 1: I tell ya if I heard some woman I know call their kid the "practice kid" I'd want to distance myself from that woman because she's not a good person to put down her own child.
Jokingly calling the oldest the "practice kid" once every few years after they get into a bit of harmless trouble is okay. Repeatedly doing it while laughing at how crappy you treated them, isn't.
@@elizabethkelley2559 Sure there's the harmless joking but it can pretty obvious when it's not, especially when alcohol is involved...at a KID'S birthday party at that to boot. Drunkenness is an excuse that only goes so far because more often than not, you see the person underneath that someone is trying to hide.
Ever child is a practice kid. Damn they don't come out like paper cut our dolls. How sad to think that every child must be treated exactly like the one before.
@marypettit7278 in this case the mom was insinuating OP was the test case, the disposable 1st draft. She was also mocking the OPs childhood pain. She's a cr@p parent.
In re: allergies. My sister is deathly allergic to bee stings. In her 20's, she came close to dying after a bee stung her in the throat. The allergy gets worse with each exposure. Over the past 6 decades, her family & friends have been uber-vigilant for her safety. If stung, she must self-medicate with an epi-pen & have someone drive her to the nearest ER/Doc-in-the-Box where she will get priority treatment. It's no laughing matter.
The pregnant woman should not have called the ex to begin with. She should have known that if he would leave her when she was pregnant he would only hurt her more in the future
Story #3: I agree that you should have sat in the downstairs lobby. BUT!! Get ready for hell!! She's going to use that poor baby to make your lives miserable. Your ex husband came back because you're stable!! You shouldn't have taken him back!
They were her stories? They were OPs childhood trauma. The mother doesn't even recognise her own wrongdoing or how it has impacted OP and she carries on with gaslighting telling OP she's the problem and further abuses her.
Don’t you just love how some ppl think you should just eat the food your allergic to and not make a fuss EVEN though you tried to tell a person beforehand that you are allergic. THESE same ppl who if it’s their kid would throw a fit and scream from the roof tops…….. YOU KNOW WHO YOU GUYS ARE. Lol
Story #2 brings up a memory. My daughter is highly allergic to artificial sweeteners, all of them. When she was 4 we went to my mom's for Christmas. My daughter brought her jello, whipped cream, and her new jello mold to make when we got there for dinner the next day. My mom decided using sugar free jello would be fine and "helped" my daughter make her jello. We were at the table, Sis was so proud of her jello she made. One bite in, she looks at me, begins crying, turns her head and projectile vomited all over the window behind her, the carpet, and her new dress. After I cleaned her up, my mom confessed she swapped the jello. My dad was furious because dinner was ruined- no one had an appetite. My dad asked why and my mom said she had never heard of someone being allergic to sweeteners. My dad asked her if she got the outcome she wanted because she thought I was lying about my daughter's allergy.
Ugh! Your poor kiddo! I’m not allergic, but I react badly to quite a few artificial sweeteners and they’re in EVERYTHING! I constantly have to read labels now. It’s rough as an adult, I hate to think about how to manage a child with this.
@@MrsWheezer We found out her reaction when her school was having a party and someone gave her diet soda. She projectile hurled instantly. My Mil said all her kids reacted this way to artificial sweeteners and her dad never told me! UGH! So any festivities at school I sent her with her treats so she knew there was something safe to eat as well as a doctor's note...copied in multiples and always on hand.
@@susanharris-rohde1127 poor thing. My middle kid was anaphylactic to dairy (also in everything). We just made a hard rule that she could only eat food we provided. At daycare, she had her own snacks cupboard that she could get treats from if someone brought cupcakes for a birthday. Fortunately, she did grow out of it.
Story 2: these people want you to be nice to someone that intentionally serve you food you could not eat? She wasn't even sorry she said she thought you were faking it and thought that was an excuse to poison you, everyone saw and just told you that you should have been nicer about it. Don't go near these people again.
I have family members and my best friend who are allergic to mushrooms and whenever I make a meal for them I leave the MUSHROMS OUT I don't even bother with them usually I can find a nice substitute like cream of Celery or cream of onion when I go food shopping with my mom we never buy mushrooms PERIOD and if the food has some form of Mushroom in it we don't buy it so yeah OP'S friend is a MONSTER and OP could have died and her friend would have been at fault if she had
Did she reimburse OP for making her waste her inhaler? Did she reimburse her for the meds she had to take when she tried to poison her? Nope. She has issues she needs to face and work through.
There was another post similar to this one. The roommate cooked soy bacon when op was allergic to soy. OP had a severe reaction, and ended up in the hospital. Ok had specifically asked what kind of bacon it was and was assured it was regular bacon. OP sued and won the case for medical expenses and had a criminal case against her too.
@@lauralfreeberg2179 now you’re reminding me of a post which OP had a gf with an allergy to fish. He’s informed his parents about his gf’s allergy because they were having a fish fry when they were coming over. The mom tells OP she will fry her some chicken instead. Day of the party, gf gets a severe reaction and is taken to the hospital. Turns out the mom fried the chicken with the fish. She told OP she thought the gf was faking it. Gf broke up with OP.
That has to suck. You can't trust that "pumpkin spice" is just that anymore since they started added pumpkin to it. I don't like pumpkin and I hate that fun surprise. It has to be so much worse for you.
@@Cypresssina Yup. If I got to a drive through, “Would you like to try our pumpkin spice whatever?” 🙄 “No thank you.” 🎃🚫 And, pumpkin stuff smells “off” to me.
Last story; man don’t do it! That last commenter might be playing at your heart strings but you gotta think about it! You take her in. She hates you, your wife hates you, your entire life blows up but hey, at least you can alleviate that guilt. Except now your flooded with uncontrollable regret. It’s terrible what she’s going through but it’s no less terrible than the shit going on all over the world. Grandma just wants to make it YOUR problem because you picked up the phone. Don’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm.
Story 4: NTA. You can help, you can help by calling CPS ahead of time. Hun, this is not now nor was it every your problem. And an Human being is a big responsibility to take on. Don’t feel bad for not stepping up where her own parents won’t.
And for OPs sanity I hope they block any numbers they haven’t saved because the grandmother can tell OP has a sense of empathy so she will try to wear them down and recruit everyone possible. Curious how she got OPs number?
I like the father’s remark that he did his part for his kid because he paid child support. Good old dad is a real keeper, but by what exactly, I don’t know. That statement is equivalent to “I made eggs for you last week, so my breakfast duties are over.”
Reuniting with ex-husband NTA with supporting him at the hospital but continuing to go when the child’s mother does not want you there will make you the a-hole. You need to respect her wishes and not be there
No no no. She was a big idiot when she stepped into the hospital room of the ex. I'd even call it toxic. She wasn't there to support her husband. She was there to keep an eye on him. And honestly getting back together with him, after he showed what an irresponsible asshole he is, was the most stupid idea ever.
It does read like she went into the room where the new mum was, which is strange because in England they only allow two visitors at a time, is it different in other parts of the world? She could/should have stayed in the waiting area!
@doctordetroit1217 yeah I know in NY there can be a few but at the mother's request. And they can't be there for too long. I guess more like a revolving door situation.
Story 1 + Update: I’m so glad at least you have 1 stable parent in your life. Look, I can see making the joke your Mom made too, but not about something that tragic and not drunk. Also I like to think I built up enough of a repore of my loved ones to understand that it was always a joke. I most certainly wouldn’t respond to their concerns with “Learn to take a joke”.
'She made you a homemade meal so you should appreciate it' okay lemme make you my special homemade cyanide lasagna. Are you gonna eat that now? The crunchy bits are rat poison! People are frickin' wild when it comes to disrespecting people with allergies and their completely valid desire to not die.
Op really should have pressed charges and follow through to the fullest extend of the law about the food allergy. What her friend did was potentially deadly all because she didnt believe OP when she had no reason not to. This makes her a real danger to society that shes so quick and fine with poisening people because of her own opinions on objective matters. She needs to be behind bars for a while and let that lesson sink in nice and deep cause her actions can quite easily kill people. What if she does it to a kid whos not fully prepared to handle a severe allergic reaction? She just going to say she thought it was a lie as the kid is hauled out in a body bag?
Story 2= Yes that "friend" was a monster. She got a list of OP's allergies, she had food that at least one of them. It was NOT an accident, as seen when the monster watched OP eat. She KNEW what she was doing.
My mom use to laugh with her GF about how well I was trained. Kinda like a good dog. I wasn't trained so much as scard for my life if I didn't do a good job. These jobs were acting as her personal maid. If she was in a bad mood, or something made her mad. She'd take it out on me. Like saying the work that she showed what to yesterday was wrong. That I knew it. Then the beating would start
First story: you are soooo much better than me because I would have cracked some jokes back embarrass her with the fights she had with my father or joke about she might need an AA meeting before my sister needs a therapist like me 😂 man she would never show her face around her friends again 😂
Story 1: these other moms where absolutely horrified. I would be surprised if mommy dearest would be ever invited to a social gathering at all. Maybe for Mel's sake, but that's all.
Last story: the mom of the half sister established child support before ditching the kid with her own mom, does that mean she's still getting the child support payments and may not actually be sending them to the potentially dying caretaker of the child?
I feel so sorry for that kid, imagine being 13 and knowing that pretty much no one in the world actually wants you; no wonder she's acting out, her boyfriend is about the only person in the world that actually seems to want her around.
Story 3: I'm in the unusual position of not giving a damn about anybody but the poor baby and OPs kids in this situation. All the adults sound like they should be in Gerry Springer's waiting room.
A practice kid! There is no such thing!! Every child has a human right to be cherished & doted on & fed & nurtured. If you have a child & think of them as an essential ‘throw away’ for your ‘real’ kids, give them up to be adopted by people who really want to be parents!!
Just another case of “ it just can’t be that bad” until it happens to them. Imagine being so full of yourself that you believe that your friends lie to you about their illnesses
Abandone step sister story: “she’s an innocent kid” - yeah but so is OP who has not an ounce of responsibility for a feral teen who’s already sleeping around and drinking. Who want to introduce that into their home?
At the very LEAST she tried to poison you. At the most, she tried to end your life. I think it’s time to distance yourself from her before she succeeds
NTA in op st hospital for supporting husband story. 1. She was doing nothing but being supportive 2. She merely existed 3. Shes the baby's stepmom, that is she is a package deal with the father. 4. If I was the father id be pissed you said shit to my wife
The dad in fact DOESN'T have an obligation... He paid for the kid and didn't have custody in the first place... Sue him over what exactly??? Oh he finished paying child support for a kid he never wanted and soon as it ends is where that connection ends 👀 Ya know... That's how child support and custody works right? Nobody is talking about the mother who had custody and ran away... The sole legally responsible person 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
Nope! Chemo isn’t usually just a month... when I went through it i was on chemo for just over a year. Don’t take the girl in. It would be different if she wasn’t drinking, sneaking out & running around.
@@Treveyon2010I’ll change it for you. Baby momma shouldn’t have been a toxic woman, broke up with the baby daddy and get made he got back with his ex wife
What’s up with people question the reality of a food allergy? That’s just dumb. The OP should tell all those people telling them they were rude that they gave the host a list of what they were allergic to and she specifically made a meal to “test” the allergy. She was malicious. That is indeed monstrous.
Story 1 nta, not all parents deserves kids, but some clearly deserves the worst things. No one is an AH for being resentful of their parents having more resources for their siblings than when they had them, it's perfectly normal to be envious and jealous that your siblings, had more or better things than what you could get because your parents were in tough financial spot when it was your turn.
1. no, nta. op sounds like a good and appreciative brother and son, not that his mom really deserves that!! it was extremely inappropriate of op’s mom to say those things, and to tell those painful stories in that way. i’m so glad that op’s stepdad was supportive and loving; he sounds like an amazing dad, and i’m glad op has him in his corner. i hope that op’s mom gets help for her drinking problem. i’m glad op will continue to see his dad and melody!!! 2. nta!!! leia is ableist. in fact, all of op’s friends sound pretty ableist, as well as quite literally dangerous to op’s health. people who refuse to accomodate your disabilities are NOT your real friends. 3. nta!!! op didn’t “steal” anything - op’s boyfriend doesn’t belong to anyone, and he can make his own fucking choices!!! op was asked to come there and did in order to support her boyfriend.
You can’t just go in another person’s hospital room where you know you aren’t wanted. That’s rude and disrespectful. Her boyfriend isn’t the patient so he didn’t need any support.
As for story 1, not only do I adore OP, I also adore his stepdad, and especially, his stepdad, he has his head on straight, and his heart in the right place.💛👍
@@madlie2452 well seeing as it was his child and it was a emergency yea he was there for the fucking baby, not his fault the mother was a little bitch and is why he broke up with her shes just sour that he didnt stay with her baby trapping ass
S1: Glad OP went NC. So the mom is toxic, a drunk, and a liar. Stepdad needs to throw her out. She won't lift a finger to get help, unless she faces real consequences for her poor choices.
In the second story, That young lady could have in up jail for attempting to kill her friend, by put something in the food she served her guests. Take from one that as asthma and suffer from allergies and have to be hospitalized more than i can count. Those two medical emergency that should never be played with, both can be life or death situation. I get very upset when people say that you faking it . OP please do eat from friends or relatives, that doesn't take your medical issues seriously. She is not your friend, she and her flying monkeys can take a hint. Please take of yourself and keep up with your doctor's appointments.
This makes me think back to Stallone demolition man where Sandra bullock said you have to have a license to get pregnant......maybe that's not such a bad idea! These people should not be allowed to reproduce if they are treating the kiddos like unwanted pets 😔
Story 3, As female contraception - which is all there is apart from condoms, and so is something that is agreed on as a couple and men just have to take on trust - is about as reliable as a vasectomy I don't actually believe that most of the 'accidents' claimed by women are actually accidental. If they were, they'd be about the same in number as the failed vasectomy stories. This sound more like yet another women removing/tampering with/lying about contraception to remove consent from a man (not like there's any legal or social repercussions when women do it) and then getting in a snit because getting rapey only got her a baby, and not the captive male she was after. She planned a kid with someone who did not want a kid with her. No need to get angry at him for going back to someone he knows he can trust, and wanting them around as support when forced to deal with her.
Story 4: NTA. After reconciling/reigniting the relationship with her ex-husband, he gets news that his most recent child is being born via distressing circumstances. He was likely in a state of shock and worry and OP went with him as support. Not only did he not know how the child was faring, he would be facing a family pissed off at him for ending the relationship while his ex-GF was pregnant. Has anyone considered he might have asked OP not to leave him alone with them? OP was only there once, the night the child was born and it doesn't sound like she had any intention of being there to begin with unless her husband asked it of her. Based on the text OP received, it sounds like ex-GF expected some level of commitment out of him for getting pregnant (baby trapping) and is largely pissed off that she's not going to get it. She isn't even going to get the chance to try to make him "come around" because he's re-entered a committed relationship.
Nothing indicated baby trapping? Did he use condoms? Most likely not. So he didn't do his part/responsibility prevent pregnancy. She could have fully be on birth control, but people LOVE to ignore the fact that even when using hormonal birth control, chance if pregnancy is 8%. Combine condom with that, it's reduced to 1%. Maybe condom waS only protection and he took it off without telling her? She didn't have to go room, she could have fully be in waiting area. Nah she wanted to show baby mama she "won"
@@duckeh1952 or maybe just maybe she actually did just went for the husband? ya know cos not everyone wants to live in a soap opera like everyone seem to think lol so many miserable and bitter people when it comes to people getting back together
@@bl4ckhearts802not to mention, OP sat silently and not interacting with anyone. Yeah, she could've sat in the waiting room for sure but baby mama sounds like drama regardless, she was talking about "my hospital" so OP would've only been in the clear if she didn't go with her ex-husband boyfriend.
I have to admit that you collecting change to get your bio parents to stop fighting is cute & sweet. BUT, since the fighting was (apparently) constant, it’s also very very sad & tragic. I hope your mom gets help.
story 1: the memory about the money absolutely broke my heart. that should have been a wakeup call to the mother, not a “dumb, funny” story. no child should have to bear the burden of adult problems
last story, crap comment "she is your blood", untrue aka half sibling and means nothing, never met the child, dad is responsible, wanted the fun but not the burden !
S2 - what an incredibly toxic “friend”. I hope OP is well rid of them and anyone, who sided with the friend. This is not a case of keeping enemies closer.
Story 2 wtf, your allergic and she is trying to kill you. Allergies are serious business, get better friends! Last story she is trying dump that kid on you. This is your fathers kid his problem. Don’t ruin your life, you don’t need this crap.
last comment: "will no one think of the girl?" OP IS thinking of the girl. OP is a stranger to the girl. they may be related by blood, but there is no relationship between them. and right now, why should she - the girl - accept his help? because the kind of help she needs only works if the person being helped is willing to be helped. what OP should do is connect the grandma to CPS, so that CPS can get the girl some stablity and the grandma can smooth the transition hopefully enough that the girl will be willing to accept the help and support CPS offers
@@lorilancaster5917 oh certainly. but if Grandma hands girl over, 1) she gets to meet girl's case officer and get reassured that things will be okay, and 2) girl gets assured that grandma trusts said case officer, which will make it easier for case officer to actually help girl
@@helenafarkas4534problem is that grandmother doesn’t want to do that. She would rather harass OP after getting no where with the kid’s actual dad. If OP gives his woman even a shred of belief that he cares for the half sister, she will likely keep pushing him to take her in instead of take any other recommendations
last commenter say " the girl is innocent, and not wrong in any way" as if the OP is the one abandoning the kid. OP also innocent and none of this is OP fault.
Last story: The dad should step up, but that doesn't mean he's capable. I don't think it's in the daughter's best interest. We don't know shit about this man, except that he knows nothing about his daughter, nothing about raising a teen, and openly hates the idea of doing so. Nothing good will come of forcing that on him, this isn't a Hollywood flick where a good man reluctantly becomes a father and they become a family. This is a situation that, at best, leads to the daughter being badly neglected when she needs guidance and support, at worst leads to other types of abuse as he takes out his anger on her.
Unfortunately, it is a very hard lesson that I took a very long time to learn, but You can't save everyone. Is make sure trying to save someone isn't going to make you drown
With the first story I heard this before on Mark narrations and even with the update I can tell that the mom is one of those women is like hey I get it we had you young but you were basically the preparation for how I want be a better parent to the children I have after you. You going low contact with her right now is only going to make things difficult later on down the road this is one of those situations where your stepfather in my arms believe he's going to get her to ease back on her drinking but not necessarily face the fact that there's still a lot of unresolved issues from your childhood that she's not ready to face yet. You're not in the wrong here we get ready she will seek her flying monkeys on to you ASAP. Even if her friends are absolutely horrified by what she said. There are still going to be a very very very very very very small number of them that will be on her side. And I guarantee that your mother had you probably when she was still in high school or 18 or 19 and the moment she got with your fathernot your bile there but the one that raised you and loved you as his own and knew that this was serious he gave you enough stability to realize there's more to life than this. You're not in the wrong here but get ready if I were you I would start telling your stepdad that as much as you love my mom you know that you need to leave her for the sake of Melody because if you don't she will go through someone of the exact same things that I went through at least in the physical sense if her drink and get their hand in the future. And by the way even if she does get her drinking under control she will forever blame you for everything and more because you're easier instead of just saying you're right.
The other woman story: had it been me I would taken this moment to present him with divorce papers and her with a lawsuit. Then wished them well and left.
S2: Why the friends use the "homemade meal" card like it actually means something here? She made a meal that would purposefully put Op at risk. That just makes her look even worse, lmao. She is a monster.
If I had of been her kid hearing this at then party i would have walked in while she's laughing about fuking up you're life and sadly asked is that all I am to you is a practice kid? Does my childhood traumas you and dad created for me mean so little to you? Then just turn around while crying and leave. Don't shout just talk normal but shame her in front of her friends.
Story 3: NTA. Her being delusional is not an excuse to keep her away. Look, if you’re worried about stressing her out too much then go to the lobby or something. But you were there to support your partner, hard stop.
her partner was not the one giving birth. She should have stayed in the lobby point blank. just because the poor girl decided to have a baby with some man that's in some weird relationship where they go back and forth every few years isn't her fault. OP was playing dumb, or she is just dumb. I wouldn't think that's a reach considering her choice of a forever partner.
@@cynicalnina OP and her bf broke up after over 10 years of marriage and only after seeing each other after 4 years did they reconcile. This can not be called and ON/OFF relationship.I also think that when her bf got the call from the hospital, he was in a state of shock and she was there for him. They both could have waited in the lobby. However the ex saying OP stole her baby daddy when they where not together anymore and she was his wife and has his kids already, that just screams "delusional" in my opinion. I would not be surprised if she where to try to get back together with him for the baby
I think Americans have a Hard Time understanding the concept/ issues of allergies. That's something you hardly see in Europe and the rest of the whole world...
Story about the poisoner: everyone that gives OP any grief should have it laid out explicitly that the poisoner was given a list of allergies along with an offer to bring your own food, she said the food would be fine, but had deliberately put things she was told OP was allergic to in them. So, just how grateful should OP when someone deliberately did something that could potentially kill her? Then offer to make them some rat poison cookies so they can be just as grateful.
Good lord, these commenters are overreacting in the third story. I mean seriously what’s wrong with showing support for your husband? And these people are confusing it for starting drama? Jesus Christ, what a bunch of triggered owls? That new girlfriend does not have the emotional maturity to have a baby if she’s over reacting like this
I’m going to have to disagree with you. If OP was truly there to support her husband, she would’ve stayed in the lobby with the rest of the relatives. Or she could’ve went to the cafeteria while he visited. OP said she has three kids so she knows what a woman goes through and the vulnerabilities of childbirth. Yet she chose to invite herself in the room while another woman was in a bad state. A moment meant for the mother, father, and baby. Not the father’s gf/ex wife. I agree with the commenter who said OP kicked a woman while she was down in order to flex that she got the man.
My big issue is that the OP claims to not be there to cause drama, but to support her husband. My question is: WHO IS WATCHING YOUR THREE KIDS? They left the house in a hurry. Did they have time to get someone to stay with the kids? If she really didn't want to cause drama, she would have stayed home where she belonged. I think she only went to keep her husband from changing his mind about recommitting to the ex-girlfriend.
@@lorilancaster5917there is a massive difference between not reading the room that you should leave and being told to leave. Should she have left when the mother and baby came into the room, yeah, but that's different from being told to leave the room and refusing. One is being oblivious and a bit of an idiot, and the other is behaving like an AH. She's had three kids yes but she's not had, that we know of, any kids with a partner who broke up with her and reconciled with their previous partner. Yes it's a moment for the mother father and baby but the mother should have realised that even before OP and the father got back together that they were going to be connected by having children with the same man. Currently OP is actually Stepmom as well since she's the one in a relationship with the dad. So the ex is just going to make everyone's life harder including, and most importantly, her own child's life if she doesn't accept that.
@@blandoatmeal1273 so by your logic, just because a woman hooked up with a divorced man and got pregnant became upset with him when he decided to ditch her to be with ex, her feelings during a vulnerable state should he invalidated? And why assume she’ll make things difficult just because OP was an AH? She had every right to say how she felt and I feel bad that she didn’t have someone to advocate for her.
@@lorilancaster5917He broke up with the baby mama because of other reasons that had nothing to do with op. The baby mama is trying to claim the victim of op taking away her happy family with op's bf.
Baby mama/wife story- NTA. Baby mama hooked up with a married man and said man stuck with his wife. Somehow side chick is pissed? That’s her stepchild now. Women really need to take accountability for the men they have kids with. Lol no wonder sexism exists
What? They were not married when he and the ex got together. They had been divorced for over 4 years and got back together after he broke up with the ex because she was pregnant. Literary and comprehension skills are important skills to learn.
Damn this take screams "pick me". While the ex girlfriend is off her rocker you got the facts wrong. Also sexism exists because people with small minds like you. Go touch grass my guy.
Story 1 and update. OP NTA. Even though I am not a parent, drinking alcohol at a child's bday is very dangerous and not normal. Also i dont see how any of those stories Op's shared were funny they sounded more heartbroken and her being insensitive for what she was calling OP. OP you handled the situation maturally. I am do glad you talked with your Stepdad and that he took this seriously. i am glad he gives you love and affirmation. As you saw, it was very important that you told him your side of the story since all he had was your mom's. I also think it was important that you had told him about the drinking. I know people won't stop drinking without wanting to stop themselves But your mom is putting you and your half sibling in danger. Your step dad has a responsibility to protect both you and the youngest no matter how much he might love your mom. Glad he is supporting you going NC with your mom. I hope your able to still have good relationship with half sister and step dad and be there for each other. Hope your therapy will help. But also remember, you and half sister are the children. mom, bio dad and stepdad are the adults., They shouldnt be forcing their problems onto you.. i hope the nc will help you heal.
Story 3-YTA. There was no need for you to be in there while the baby momma was drugged up. Sounds like Op wanted to make a point that she was back with the husband
Story 2. OP NTA. But the host 😅is a massive YTA and I wouldn't be friends with her or feel it a big loss. She knows you have medical conditions, asthma and allergies but thinks you are faking it. Doesn't sound like a safe person to be around or someone who cares about your health. BUT it isn't her responsibility to carry your inhaler. Now you did the right thing by telling her your list of allergies ahead of time so plans could be made. It was her job to tell you whether she preferred you to bring your own food or if she would exclude those things that you were allergic too. Yeah it does add extra time to the meal prep but it is better to have that than causing someone to have an allergic reaction and make them go to the hospital. OP should have asked if any of her allergies were in the food before eating. But i can't blame op for being mad at the friend and calling her a monster. I would be even madder at her for thinking allergies are something to joke about and not take seriously. The friend could have just told OP to bring some safe food to the party. It wasn't like she wasn't told about the allergies. OP dump that gal and all who are giving you crap.if they can't. See what she did was wrong on so many levels, then their not safe people to be around. But please remember to ask about the food before ever eating anything..
Story 1 - haha because childhood neglect is so super funny. Telling people you didn't try hard for your first child with your child in the room listening to these stories is hilarious. 🤦 And it's super classy to get drunk at a child's birthday party. I'd pray for op's younger sibling at this point. Story 2 - Press charges or block them all and get new friends. I can't believe people are more upset at op vs the idiot that tried to test her allergies. Story 3 - I'd only feel sympathy if this woman was led on. If he told her he wasn't looking for anything serious that's on her. This drama flabbergasted me. It's not op's fault she got dumped as soon as she got knocked up. She's directing all of her anger at the wrong person here. Story 4 - poor girl. She's clearly acting up in response to the fact that nobody wants her and she's been clearly abandoned by everyone in the family. It sounds like a lose lose situation but it's not a situation that op created. NTA.
With the story about trying to get the parents to stop fighting, id probably call that a bitter sweet memory. Your child cares that much…but he also absolutely SHOULD NOT. Id be both happy and sad about it. Mom still sucks though for making light of it
They are people, like any others. They are just as likely to be good, bad, or neutral. Just as likely to be corrupt, to be manipulative, to be biased or prejudiced or even bigoted (e.g. might be more likely to take kids away from a stable gay relationship 'cuz oh no the gays, we can't let gays have the kids), and so forth. So while some of them are good people, some of them are monsters, and you can't tell ahead of time which ones will be involved with your situation. On top of that, CPS is under-funded and under-staffed, and they need to follow certain regulations that might or might not be good. They're dealing with too many cases with not enough people or time. They're placing kids with foster parents who might be good people or might be monsters and, again, you can't tell which you're dealing with until it's too late -- the monsters are good at hiding within the system. So I understand why some people are leery of getting CPS involved. But in some cases it's honestly the best choice, or the only option, and a lot of kids have gone through foster care and come out the other side with a positive experience (though of course there's always trauma from any situation where you're removed from your parents).
Story 1 - OP NTA - Here is a funny story for you to share at the next family event... "Isn't it funny how some parents think that they are "better" parents once they have a second child, right mom?, Isn't it hilarious?" It is disgusting that your so-called mother thinks that is funny to make fun of your firstborn painful and sad childhood memories and experiences. As a mother, if I were in that group listening to your so-called mother, I would ask her... hey, what is so funny about that story, can you explain so I can get the "joke"? OP, good on you for putting your SF on notice and for putting some distance between you and your toxic so-called mother.
Story 3: The "baby mama" did nothing wrong-- she dated OP's husband years after he and Op's marriage dissolved; and expected to stay with him during her pregnancy. If she's toxic, not cool; but OP never gave reasons on how-- and, regardless, her behavior in this situation is completely justified. No one would want the woman who replaced their place in their baby daddy's life to show up at the hospital especially post a traumatic medical situation, doped up. Maybe NAH; but OP brushing her concerns aside the entire story makes me think she left out crucial dynamics to paint the situation in her favor.
Replaced her where? The OP came first for 10 years and is the mother of his three kids that came before this baby. Even if they never got back together she was always going to be apart of his life. I had to add that no one was replaced in this situation relationships end every day. She has every right to not want the OP there and to set reasonable boundaries. But she’s going to have to suck it up buttercup for her child or else her life will be nothing but drama, chaos, and toxicity.
@@TheMelodicDreams Except they were separated without meaning to reconcile for three-four years. In that time, OP's ex dated and eventually/accidentally impregnated this new woman: hence, not a mistress. She then has to juggle that hurt (which is unfair of her to take out on OP, true); but it has nothing to do with THIS particular event. In this case, It's her choice who sees her after a medical procedure, just as everyone on Reddit would agree if OP were the one who had given birth and the ex and his wife dropped in and saw her drugged up.
Last time I had a baby there was no waiting room on the maternity floor, 'baby daddy' wanted OP there for support as it was a emegency birth. "Dad' was a wreck not knowing if the baby momma was going to live or die, or what was happening with the kid THAT was why OP was there. OP didn't say anything, simply sat there offering physical, and emotional support for her BF. It was going to be akward no matter what. Should she have left the minute they knew everything was ok? And waited in the lobby or in her car to give the soon to be hubby a ride home? Probably, maybe, but I don't think OP was the AH for being there for the BF who was having to deal with the family of the 'toxic ex', and an emotional wreck after that scary text "medical complications / emergency c-section" He needed some one there on HIS side holding HIS hand and helping him through it, and he was NOT going to get it from "baby momma's" family. OP didn't make it WORSE by being all up in their business, or being a 'Karen' demanding this or that. She sat there quitely, simply to support HIM. Baby momma is toxic for thinking OP "stole" the baby daddy from her.... They broke up at LEAST a month or better before OP and he got back together. And we don't know how far along the preg was, or how long OP and BF/ soon to be hubby have been dating when baby momma had the kid. He was never HERS to steal... OP is going to have to completely stay away from pick up and drop off's with this woman, and block the baby momma on her phone and all social accounts. They are going to need to do everything through the courts and a mediator or app. It's going to be messy, and I hope OP is up for it.
story 1: that "mother" is an absolute terrible Charlie Ultra November Tango of a human, she isnt even worthy of the moniker of "mother", im betting you she'll try and do something to the stepdad because he supported op
IDK how commenters think CPS works, but that girl will NOT be getting the help she needs in 90% of foster situations. She'll be labeled as a "problem child", not get taken in by any good homes, and possibly end up in juvie, on the streets, or dead before she's 18. I'm not saying OP has to take her in, but being involved in some way helps her actually get help and may even protect her from abuse. Even just emails or phone calls so people know someone will notice her missing. Foster children are preyed on because they are isolated and vulnerable. Again, don't take her in if you can't, just...maybe recognize the truth of the situation.
Story 1 I was also the practice child. First of 6. I survived 😂 but then of course parentfies. No wonser didn't want chuldren had the exp. No regrets am old bow but like these stories as see others' similar things Ah well that's life.
I make fun of my friends allergies, but the thing is I also make fun of my diabetes. No, I dont think my friend is faking it and I think he would die if he got exposed to some of the stuff he is allergic to, Like, some stuff might just rash him, other stuff is like instant death. He can even feel that someone ate some types of fruit in the same room from how he is sensitive to it. Had he been like this to mushrooms and actually ate it, he would die. Allergies are no joke. Its literal poison. personally, few people in mu life told me I should exercise and mediatate my diabetes away (usually due to lack of understanding), but people with allergies literally cant catch a break. Now I know why he has ocd like behavior as who knows who will one day decide to "test" your allergy. Thee was even a post about MIL killing her own granddaughter. Diabetes feels like nothing compared to that.
Story 1: NTA, OP, times 100000(100000000). Your Mom is a drunk and probably has been for a while. Drunks don't have a filter between their brain and their mouth so I'm sure that she's been saying hurtful things to and about you for a long time. It sounds like calling you her "practice kid" was the straw that broke the camel's back and things that you are only "practicing" aren't for any other use, and she was trying to USE you for babysitting which is a too RESPONSIBLE duty for a person/thing that is only meant to be for practice. SHE CAN'T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS. If she had been only "PRACTICING" when she made you, then she should have used protection OR ABSTINANCE. People who actually get born are not "PRACTICE PEOPLE" or "Ooops babies". They're PEOPLE and they have all the rights to life, liberty, work, travel AND DIGNITY, that are granted to EVERYONE in the Constitution and Declaration of Independence. Those documents apply to EVERYONE EQUALLY and not just some old, drunk bags that set up children's parties as a cover for moaning about the kids that they didn't want or no longer want because that kid is inconvenient or not the latest model.
Unpopular opinion on the story about the wife showing up at the hospital but nta. The only reason the new baby mama cares is because she still wants him. I'd tell her to grow up. She's the actual idiot for dating a man still semi involved with his ex and being surprised when they get back together. Never date a man who's just separated or keeps fluttering around an ex wife like Pepe le pew around that black cat with a painted stripe.
How do you know that? Are you a mind reader! OP was only there to support her husband and didn't interact with anyone else. She probably did the driving as the husband wasn't in the right mind to drive himself
Story 2 has a part cut out and you can tell just by listening to it and if you watch it you can see that it jumps to a different part of the story wtf how did you fuck it up
Hearing they tried to gather change to stop an argument made me tear up. I don't know how someone could laugh about that.
The other parents are absolutely horrified by what was said!
Story one: Years later, when mother goes to OP with her hand out for ANYTHING, OP can tell her "Sorry. You were just the practice parent."
Sounds like he can say the same if bio dad tries to make a guest appearance in his life
@@lorilancaster5917 Maybe.
Story 1: I bet my bottom dollar the other moms at that party we’re secretly horrified
yeah ... like her story didnt show op in bad light but her ...
I think they were I heard from another reddit reader OP said it in the comments
Hopefully, or maybe it’s a birds-of-a-feather situation, and they’re all shitty people.
Here's a funny anecdote about my practice kid's traumatic core memory that paints me terribly. Isn't it hilarious? Veronica, you look pale. Shall I open another bottle of rose?
If they were good people I have a feeling they did. If that is also the case Im sure they were also weirded out by her serving alcohol to a four year olds birthday. Im betting OP has a lot of shirts or coasters referring herself as a wine mom
Story 1: I tell ya if I heard some woman I know call their kid the "practice kid" I'd want to distance myself from that woman because she's not a good person to put down her own child.
Jokingly calling the oldest the "practice kid" once every few years after they get into a bit of harmless trouble is okay. Repeatedly doing it while laughing at how crappy you treated them, isn't.
@@elizabethkelley2559 Sure there's the harmless joking but it can pretty obvious when it's not, especially when alcohol is involved...at a KID'S birthday party at that to boot. Drunkenness is an excuse that only goes so far because more often than not, you see the person underneath that someone is trying to hide.
Ever child is a practice kid. Damn they don't come out like paper cut our dolls.
How sad to think that every child must be treated exactly like the one before.
@@marypettit7278expecting not to be treated like shit is reasonable. Are you the mother or projecting how you are as a person?
@marypettit7278 in this case the mom was insinuating OP was the test case, the disposable 1st draft. She was also mocking the OPs childhood pain. She's a cr@p parent.
In re: allergies. My sister is deathly allergic to bee stings. In her 20's, she came close to dying after a bee stung her in the throat. The allergy gets worse with each exposure. Over the past 6 decades, her family & friends have been uber-vigilant for her safety. If stung, she must self-medicate with an epi-pen & have someone drive her to the nearest ER/Doc-in-the-Box where she will get priority treatment. It's no laughing matter.
Oh, she made a homemade meal? Well, then that TOTALLY makes up for the possible death then. 🙄
Love defeats all allergens 🙄
@lorilancaster5917 Were we working with Anime rules?! Damnit that changes EVERYTHING! Love and friendship are a fix-all cure! Lol 😋
Just be glad OP didn't tell her 'friend' that it was bad for her if she was stabbed.
The pregnant woman should not have called the ex to begin with. She should have known that if he would leave her when she was pregnant he would only hurt her more in the future
Story 2: NTA. She was poisoning you. That’s pretty rude in itself.
2nd time she showed signs of disregarding OPs allergies. 'Friend' is a prisoners. She should face charges.
Story #3: I agree that you should have sat in the downstairs lobby. BUT!! Get ready for hell!! She's going to use that poor baby to make your lives miserable. Your ex husband came back because you're stable!! You shouldn't have taken him back!
I dont think she planned on having a kid to spite anyone. Also, op using the term baby momma is so freaking wrong.
They were her stories? They were OPs childhood trauma. The mother doesn't even recognise her own wrongdoing or how it has impacted OP and she carries on with gaslighting telling OP she's the problem and further abuses her.
Don’t you just love how some ppl think you should just eat the food your allergic to and not make a fuss EVEN though you tried to tell a person beforehand that you are allergic. THESE same ppl who if it’s their kid would throw a fit and scream from the roof tops…….. YOU KNOW WHO YOU GUYS ARE. Lol
Story #2 brings up a memory. My daughter is highly allergic to artificial sweeteners, all of them. When she was 4 we went to my mom's for Christmas. My daughter brought her jello, whipped cream, and her new jello mold to make when we got there for dinner the next day. My mom decided using sugar free jello would be fine and "helped" my daughter make her jello. We were at the table, Sis was so proud of her jello she made. One bite in, she looks at me, begins crying, turns her head and projectile vomited all over the window behind her, the carpet, and her new dress. After I cleaned her up, my mom confessed she swapped the jello. My dad was furious because dinner was ruined- no one had an appetite. My dad asked why and my mom said she had never heard of someone being allergic to sweeteners. My dad asked her if she got the outcome she wanted because she thought I was lying about my daughter's allergy.
@@Katherinedawn25 too true
Ugh! Your poor kiddo!
I’m not allergic, but I react badly to quite a few artificial sweeteners and they’re in EVERYTHING! I constantly have to read labels now. It’s rough as an adult, I hate to think about how to manage a child with this.
@@MrsWheezer We found out her reaction when her school was having a party and someone gave her diet soda. She projectile hurled instantly. My Mil said all her kids reacted this way to artificial sweeteners and her dad never told me! UGH! So any festivities at school I sent her with her treats so she knew there was something safe to eat as well as a doctor's note...copied in multiples and always on hand.
@@susanharris-rohde1127 poor thing.
My middle kid was anaphylactic to dairy (also in everything). We just made a hard rule that she could only eat food we provided. At daycare, she had her own snacks cupboard that she could get treats from if someone brought cupcakes for a birthday. Fortunately, she did grow out of it.
@@MrsWheezer Poor Baby. Glad she grew out of that one. My daughter (30) and now my granddaughter (6) react the same way.
Story 2: these people want you to be nice to someone that intentionally serve you food you could not eat? She wasn't even sorry she said she thought you were faking it and thought that was an excuse to poison you, everyone saw and just told you that you should have been nicer about it. Don't go near these people again.
I have family members and my best friend who are allergic to mushrooms and whenever I make a meal for them I leave the MUSHROMS OUT I don't even bother with them usually I can find a nice substitute like cream of Celery or cream of onion when I go food shopping with my mom we never buy mushrooms PERIOD and if the food has some form of Mushroom in it we don't buy it so yeah OP'S friend is a MONSTER and OP could have died and her friend would have been at fault if she had
Did she reimburse OP for making her waste her inhaler? Did she reimburse her for the meds she had to take when she tried to poison her? Nope. She has issues she needs to face and work through.
There was another post similar to this one. The roommate cooked soy bacon when op was allergic to soy. OP had a severe reaction, and ended up in the hospital. Ok had specifically asked what kind of bacon it was and was assured it was regular bacon. OP sued and won the case for medical expenses and had a criminal case against her too.
@@lauralfreeberg2179 now you’re reminding me of a post which OP had a gf with an allergy to fish. He’s informed his parents about his gf’s allergy because they were having a fish fry when they were coming over. The mom tells OP she will fry her some chicken instead. Day of the party, gf gets a severe reaction and is taken to the hospital. Turns out the mom fried the chicken with the fish. She told OP she thought the gf was faking it. Gf broke up with OP.
if people defend someone who think your faking it then they probably think your faking it too and you should find other friends
I’m allergic to pumpkin, and it’s about pumpkin season. No one that knows me offers me ANYTHING pumpkin!!
That has to suck. You can't trust that "pumpkin spice" is just that anymore since they started added pumpkin to it. I don't like pumpkin and I hate that fun surprise. It has to be so much worse for you.
@@Cypresssina Yup. If I got to a drive through, “Would you like to try our pumpkin spice whatever?” 🙄 “No thank you.” 🎃🚫 And, pumpkin stuff smells “off” to me.
That OP looked for change all through the house to make their parents stop arguing is absolutely heartbreaking! How can a mother be so heartless?
Last story; man don’t do it! That last commenter might be playing at your heart strings but you gotta think about it! You take her in. She hates you, your wife hates you, your entire life blows up but hey, at least you can alleviate that guilt. Except now your flooded with uncontrollable regret. It’s terrible what she’s going through but it’s no less terrible than the shit going on all over the world. Grandma just wants to make it YOUR problem because you picked up the phone.
Don’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm.
Story 4: NTA. You can help, you can help by calling CPS ahead of time. Hun, this is not now nor was it every your problem. And an Human being is a big responsibility to take on. Don’t feel bad for not stepping up where her own parents won’t.
And for OPs sanity I hope they block any numbers they haven’t saved because the grandmother can tell OP has a sense of empathy so she will try to wear them down and recruit everyone possible. Curious how she got OPs number?
I like the father’s remark that he did his part for his kid because he paid child support. Good old dad is a real keeper, but by what exactly, I don’t know. That statement is equivalent to “I made eggs for you last week, so my breakfast duties are over.”
I think op should ask the adres of the commenter who thinks they should consider it and tell grandma 'this person is willing to help'
Reuniting with ex-husband NTA with supporting him at the hospital but continuing to go when the child’s mother does not want you there will make you the a-hole. You need to respect her wishes and not be there
everyone sucks here. trailer park blues?
No no no. She was a big idiot when she stepped into the hospital room of the ex. I'd even call it toxic. She wasn't there to support her husband. She was there to keep an eye on him. And honestly getting back together with him, after he showed what an irresponsible asshole he is, was the most stupid idea ever.
@@Shimonotokiyeah she is but you ain’t smart
It does read like she went into the room where the new mum was, which is strange because in England they only allow two visitors at a time, is it different in other parts of the world? She could/should have stayed in the waiting area!
@doctordetroit1217 yeah I know in NY there can be a few but at the mother's request. And they can't be there for too long. I guess more like a revolving door situation.
Home made poison has me boiling...
Monster gets no apology
Story 1 + Update: I’m so glad at least you have 1 stable parent in your life. Look, I can see making the joke your Mom made too, but not about something that tragic and not drunk. Also I like to think I built up enough of a repore of my loved ones to understand that it was always a joke. I most certainly wouldn’t respond to their concerns with “Learn to take a joke”.
repore => rapport
'She made you a homemade meal so you should appreciate it' okay lemme make you my special homemade cyanide lasagna. Are you gonna eat that now? The crunchy bits are rat poison! People are frickin' wild when it comes to disrespecting people with allergies and their completely valid desire to not die.
Op really should have pressed charges and follow through to the fullest extend of the law about the food allergy. What her friend did was potentially deadly all because she didnt believe OP when she had no reason not to. This makes her a real danger to society that shes so quick and fine with poisening people because of her own opinions on objective matters. She needs to be behind bars for a while and let that lesson sink in nice and deep cause her actions can quite easily kill people. What if she does it to a kid whos not fully prepared to handle a severe allergic reaction? She just going to say she thought it was a lie as the kid is hauled out in a body bag?
Story 2= Yes that "friend" was a monster. She got a list of OP's allergies, she had food that at least one of them. It was NOT an accident, as seen when the monster watched OP eat. She KNEW what she was doing.
My mom use to laugh with her GF about how well I was trained. Kinda like a good dog. I wasn't trained so much as scard for my life if I didn't do a good job. These jobs were acting as her personal maid. If she was in a bad mood, or something made her mad. She'd take it out on me. Like saying the work that she showed what to yesterday was wrong. That I knew it. Then the beating would start
First story: you are soooo much better than me because I would have cracked some jokes back embarrass her with the fights she had with my father or joke about she might need an AA meeting before my sister needs a therapist like me 😂 man she would never show her face around her friends again 😂
Story 1: these other moms where absolutely horrified. I would be surprised if mommy dearest would be ever invited to a social gathering at all. Maybe for Mel's sake, but that's all.
Last story: the mom of the half sister established child support before ditching the kid with her own mom, does that mean she's still getting the child support payments and may not actually be sending them to the potentially dying caretaker of the child?
I feel so sorry for that kid, imagine being 13 and knowing that pretty much no one in the world actually wants you; no wonder she's acting out, her boyfriend is about the only person in the world that actually seems to want her around.
Story 3: I'm in the unusual position of not giving a damn about anybody but the poor baby and OPs kids in this situation. All the adults sound like they should be in Gerry Springer's waiting room.
A practice kid! There is no such thing!! Every child has a human right to be cherished & doted on & fed & nurtured. If you have a child & think of them as an essential ‘throw away’ for your ‘real’ kids, give them up to be adopted by people who really want to be parents!!
Just another case of “ it just can’t be that bad” until it happens to them. Imagine being so full of yourself that you believe that your friends lie to you about their illnesses
Abandone step sister story: “she’s an innocent kid” - yeah but so is OP who has not an ounce of responsibility for a feral teen who’s already sleeping around and drinking. Who want to introduce that into their home?
Story 3, holy crap there’s a lot of conclusion jumping going on here.
The allergy story...my mil keeps doing shit like this with me and my son. The last time was the last straw for me. It's wrong
At the very LEAST she tried to poison you. At the most, she tried to end your life.
I think it’s time to distance yourself from her before she succeeds
NTA in op st hospital for supporting husband story. 1. She was doing nothing but being supportive 2. She merely existed 3. Shes the baby's stepmom, that is she is a package deal with the father. 4. If I was the father id be pissed you said shit to my wife
1: "Ur a stupid c-word" is a complete sentence!!
The dad in fact DOESN'T have an obligation... He paid for the kid and didn't have custody in the first place... Sue him over what exactly??? Oh he finished paying child support for a kid he never wanted and soon as it ends is where that connection ends 👀 Ya know... That's how child support and custody works right? Nobody is talking about the mother who had custody and ran away... The sole legally responsible person 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
a 7yo trying to gather change, just to try helping, and stop their parents from arguing about money is fucking heartbreaking
Nope! Chemo isn’t usually just a month... when I went through it i was on chemo for just over a year.
Don’t take the girl in. It would be different if she wasn’t drinking, sneaking out & running around.
"She tried to hurt you but it was HOMEMADE, you are ungratefull!" WTF?
Story 4: NTA. Baby momma shojldnt have opened her legs for a married man
He wasn't married when they were together
@@Treveyon2010He wasn’t divorced either. He was still very much OP’s husband. So yes he was married when they were together.
@TheMelodicDreams op clearly stated they were divorced. They got back together after he broke up with his baby momma.
@@Treveyon2010I’ll change it for you. Baby momma shouldn’t have been a toxic woman, broke up with the baby daddy and get made he got back with his ex wife
@@ghostdragon5735*mad
What’s up with people question the reality of a food allergy? That’s just dumb. The OP should tell all those people telling them they were rude that they gave the host a list of what they were allergic to and she specifically made a meal to “test” the allergy. She was malicious. That is indeed monstrous.
Story 1 nta, not all parents deserves kids, but some clearly deserves the worst things.
No one is an AH for being resentful of their parents having more resources for their siblings than when they had them, it's perfectly normal to be envious and jealous that your siblings, had more or better things than what you could get because your parents were in tough financial spot when it was your turn.
1. no, nta. op sounds like a good and appreciative brother and son, not that his mom really deserves that!! it was extremely inappropriate of op’s mom to say those things, and to tell those painful stories in that way. i’m so glad that op’s stepdad was supportive and loving; he sounds like an amazing dad, and i’m glad op has him in his corner. i hope that op’s mom gets help for her drinking problem. i’m glad op will continue to see his dad and melody!!!
2. nta!!! leia is ableist. in fact, all of op’s friends sound pretty ableist, as well as quite literally dangerous to op’s health. people who refuse to accomodate your disabilities are NOT your real friends.
3. nta!!! op didn’t “steal” anything - op’s boyfriend doesn’t belong to anyone, and he can make his own fucking choices!!! op was asked to come there and did in order to support her boyfriend.
You can’t just go in another person’s hospital room where you know you aren’t wanted. That’s rude and disrespectful. Her boyfriend isn’t the patient so he didn’t need any support.
As for story 1, not only do I adore OP, I also adore his stepdad, and especially, his stepdad, he has his head on straight, and his heart in the right place.💛👍
@@madlie2452 well seeing as it was his child and it was a emergency yea he was there for the fucking baby, not his fault the mother was a little bitch and is why he broke up with her shes just sour that he didnt stay with her baby trapping ass
S1: Glad OP went NC. So the mom is toxic, a drunk, and a liar. Stepdad needs to throw her out. She won't lift a finger to get help, unless she faces real consequences for her poor choices.
Agreed.
Last Story:
NTA.
Last Commenter: Then you fork out the hundreds of thusands they don't have, stupid!
In the second story, That young lady could have in up jail for attempting to kill her friend, by put something in the food she served her guests. Take from one that as asthma and suffer from allergies and have to be hospitalized more than i can count. Those two medical emergency that should never be played with, both can be life or death situation. I get very upset when people say that you faking it . OP please do eat from friends or relatives, that doesn't take your medical issues seriously.
She is not your friend, she and her flying monkeys can take a hint.
Please take of yourself and keep up with your doctor's appointments.
This makes me think back to Stallone demolition man where Sandra bullock said you have to have a license to get pregnant......maybe that's not such a bad idea! These people should not be allowed to reproduce if they are treating the kiddos like unwanted pets 😔
I wouldn’t call the first born a practice child but a learning experience sounds like the mom has a favorite
Story 3, As female contraception - which is all there is apart from condoms, and so is something that is agreed on as a couple and men just have to take on trust - is about as reliable as a vasectomy I don't actually believe that most of the 'accidents' claimed by women are actually accidental. If they were, they'd be about the same in number as the failed vasectomy stories. This sound more like yet another women removing/tampering with/lying about contraception to remove consent from a man (not like there's any legal or social repercussions when women do it) and then getting in a snit because getting rapey only got her a baby, and not the captive male she was after.
She planned a kid with someone who did not want a kid with her. No need to get angry at him for going back to someone he knows he can trust, and wanting them around as support when forced to deal with her.
Story 4: NTA. After reconciling/reigniting the relationship with her ex-husband, he gets news that his most recent child is being born via distressing circumstances. He was likely in a state of shock and worry and OP went with him as support. Not only did he not know how the child was faring, he would be facing a family pissed off at him for ending the relationship while his ex-GF was pregnant. Has anyone considered he might have asked OP not to leave him alone with them? OP was only there once, the night the child was born and it doesn't sound like she had any intention of being there to begin with unless her husband asked it of her. Based on the text OP received, it sounds like ex-GF expected some level of commitment out of him for getting pregnant (baby trapping) and is largely pissed off that she's not going to get it. She isn't even going to get the chance to try to make him "come around" because he's re-entered a committed relationship.
Nothing indicated baby trapping? Did he use condoms? Most likely not. So he didn't do his part/responsibility prevent pregnancy. She could have fully be on birth control, but people LOVE to ignore the fact that even when using hormonal birth control, chance if pregnancy is 8%. Combine condom with that, it's reduced to 1%.
Maybe condom waS only protection and he took it off without telling her?
She didn't have to go room, she could have fully be in waiting area. Nah she wanted to show baby mama she "won"
@@duckeh1952 or maybe just maybe she actually did just went for the husband? ya know cos not everyone wants to live in a soap opera like everyone seem to think lol so many miserable and bitter people when it comes to people getting back together
@@bl4ckhearts802not to mention, OP sat silently and not interacting with anyone. Yeah, she could've sat in the waiting room for sure but baby mama sounds like drama regardless, she was talking about "my hospital" so OP would've only been in the clear if she didn't go with her ex-husband boyfriend.
Yeah I don't get the comments
I have to admit that you collecting change to get your bio parents to stop fighting is cute & sweet. BUT, since the fighting was (apparently) constant, it’s also very very sad & tragic.
I hope your mom gets help.
story 1: the memory about the money absolutely broke my heart. that should have been a wakeup call to the mother, not a “dumb, funny” story. no child should have to bear the burden of adult problems
Step dad is a better mom than his mom. He's a better step brother to his little step sister that some brothers.
last story, crap comment "she is your blood", untrue aka half sibling and means nothing, never met the child, dad is responsible, wanted the fun but not the burden !
S2 - what an incredibly toxic “friend”. I hope OP is well rid of them and anyone, who sided with the friend. This is not a case of keeping enemies closer.
Story 2 wtf, your allergic and she is trying to kill you. Allergies are serious business, get better friends!
Last story she is trying dump that kid on you. This is your fathers kid his problem. Don’t ruin your life, you don’t need this crap.
This honestly sickens me how she treated him
last comment: "will no one think of the girl?" OP IS thinking of the girl. OP is a stranger to the girl. they may be related by blood, but there is no relationship between them. and right now, why should she - the girl - accept his help? because the kind of help she needs only works if the person being helped is willing to be helped. what OP should do is connect the grandma to CPS, so that CPS can get the girl some stablity and the grandma can smooth the transition hopefully enough that the girl will be willing to accept the help and support CPS offers
I think CPS will intervene if grandmother’s health deteriorates and no one will take the kid. I don’t think OP should get involved in any way
@@lorilancaster5917 oh certainly. but if Grandma hands girl over, 1) she gets to meet girl's case officer and get reassured that things will be okay, and 2) girl gets assured that grandma trusts said case officer, which will make it easier for case officer to actually help girl
@@helenafarkas4534problem is that grandmother doesn’t want to do that. She would rather harass OP after getting no where with the kid’s actual dad. If OP gives his woman even a shred of belief that he cares for the half sister, she will likely keep pushing him to take her in instead of take any other recommendations
last commenter say " the girl is innocent, and not wrong in any way" as if the OP is the one abandoning the kid. OP also innocent and none of this is OP fault.
People like you are why there are so many homeless people... "Not my problem" even when it's your own family...
Good afternoon XOS. Thanks for the stories
Last story: The dad should step up, but that doesn't mean he's capable. I don't think it's in the daughter's best interest. We don't know shit about this man, except that he knows nothing about his daughter, nothing about raising a teen, and openly hates the idea of doing so. Nothing good will come of forcing that on him, this isn't a Hollywood flick where a good man reluctantly becomes a father and they become a family. This is a situation that, at best, leads to the daughter being badly neglected when she needs guidance and support, at worst leads to other types of abuse as he takes out his anger on her.
Unfortunately, it is a very hard lesson that I took a very long time to learn, but You can't save everyone. Is make sure trying to save someone isn't going to make you drown
With the first story I heard this before on Mark narrations and even with the update I can tell that the mom is one of those women is like hey I get it we had you young but you were basically the preparation for how I want be a better parent to the children I have after you. You going low contact with her right now is only going to make things difficult later on down the road this is one of those situations where your stepfather in my arms believe he's going to get her to ease back on her drinking but not necessarily face the fact that there's still a lot of unresolved issues from your childhood that she's not ready to face yet. You're not in the wrong here we get ready she will seek her flying monkeys on to you ASAP. Even if her friends are absolutely horrified by what she said. There are still going to be a very very very very very very small number of them that will be on her side. And I guarantee that your mother had you probably when she was still in high school or 18 or 19 and the moment she got with your fathernot your bile there but the one that raised you and loved you as his own and knew that this was serious he gave you enough stability to realize there's more to life than this. You're not in the wrong here but get ready if I were you I would start telling your stepdad that as much as you love my mom you know that you need to leave her for the sake of Melody because if you don't she will go through someone of the exact same things that I went through at least in the physical sense if her drink and get their hand in the future. And by the way even if she does get her drinking under control she will forever blame you for everything and more because you're easier instead of just saying you're right.
Sadly there is only one side to the I'm treated badly.
The other woman story: had it been me I would taken this moment to present him with divorce papers and her with a lawsuit. Then wished them well and left.
S2: Why the friends use the "homemade meal" card like it actually means something here? She made a meal that would purposefully put Op at risk. That just makes her look even worse, lmao. She is a monster.
If I had of been her kid hearing this at then party i would have walked in while she's laughing about fuking up you're life and sadly asked is that all I am to you is a practice kid? Does my childhood traumas you and dad created for me mean so little to you? Then just turn around while crying and leave. Don't shout just talk normal but shame her in front of her friends.
Story 3: NTA. Her being delusional is not an excuse to keep her away. Look, if you’re worried about stressing her out too much then go to the lobby or something. But you were there to support your partner, hard stop.
her partner was not the one giving birth. She should have stayed in the lobby point blank. just because the poor girl decided to have a baby with some man that's in some weird relationship where they go back and forth every few years isn't her fault. OP was playing dumb, or she is just dumb. I wouldn't think that's a reach considering her choice of a forever partner.
No, her partner is having to meet his new baby for the first time while navigating talking with the EX Mother whom he broke up with for a reason.
@@cynicalnina OP and her bf broke up after over 10 years of marriage and only after seeing each other after 4 years did they reconcile. This can not be called and ON/OFF relationship.I also think that when her bf got the call from the hospital, he was in a state of shock and she was there for him. They both could have waited in the lobby. However the ex saying OP stole her baby daddy when they where not together anymore and she was his wife and has his kids already, that just screams "delusional" in my opinion. I would not be surprised if she where to try to get back together with him for the baby
@@cynicalninashut up
Ah, yes, poor clueless supporting wife. Did she need to support him and hold his hand when he was putting his pee pee into baby mama? No? Strange.
S2: Why do people think other people lie about food allergies? WHY?
Allergy Story:
OP..YTA!
TO YOURSELF!
Stop being such a goddamned doormat and SUE HER!
I think Americans have a Hard Time understanding the concept/ issues of allergies. That's something you hardly see in Europe and the rest of the whole world...
Story about the poisoner: everyone that gives OP any grief should have it laid out explicitly that the poisoner was given a list of allergies along with an offer to bring your own food, she said the food would be fine, but had deliberately put things she was told OP was allergic to in them.
So, just how grateful should OP when someone deliberately did something that could potentially kill her?
Then offer to make them some rat poison cookies so they can be just as grateful.
Good lord, these commenters are overreacting in the third story. I mean seriously what’s wrong with showing support for your husband? And these people are confusing it for starting drama? Jesus Christ, what a bunch of triggered owls?
That new girlfriend does not have the emotional maturity to have a baby if she’s over reacting like this
I’m going to have to disagree with you. If OP was truly there to support her husband, she would’ve stayed in the lobby with the rest of the relatives. Or she could’ve went to the cafeteria while he visited. OP said she has three kids so she knows what a woman goes through and the vulnerabilities of childbirth. Yet she chose to invite herself in the room while another woman was in a bad state. A moment meant for the mother, father, and baby. Not the father’s gf/ex wife. I agree with the commenter who said OP kicked a woman while she was down in order to flex that she got the man.
My big issue is that the OP claims to not be there to cause drama, but to support her husband. My question is: WHO IS WATCHING YOUR THREE KIDS? They left the house in a hurry. Did they have time to get someone to stay with the kids? If she really didn't want to cause drama, she would have stayed home where she belonged. I think she only went to keep her husband from changing his mind about recommitting to the ex-girlfriend.
@@lorilancaster5917there is a massive difference between not reading the room that you should leave and being told to leave. Should she have left when the mother and baby came into the room, yeah, but that's different from being told to leave the room and refusing. One is being oblivious and a bit of an idiot, and the other is behaving like an AH.
She's had three kids yes but she's not had, that we know of, any kids with a partner who broke up with her and reconciled with their previous partner.
Yes it's a moment for the mother father and baby but the mother should have realised that even before OP and the father got back together that they were going to be connected by having children with the same man. Currently OP is actually Stepmom as well since she's the one in a relationship with the dad. So the ex is just going to make everyone's life harder including, and most importantly, her own child's life if she doesn't accept that.
@@blandoatmeal1273 so by your logic, just because a woman hooked up with a divorced man and got pregnant became upset with him when he decided to ditch her to be with ex, her feelings during a vulnerable state should he invalidated?
And why assume she’ll make things difficult just because OP was an AH? She had every right to say how she felt and I feel bad that she didn’t have someone to advocate for her.
@@lorilancaster5917He broke up with the baby mama because of other reasons that had nothing to do with op. The baby mama is trying to claim the victim of op taking away her happy family with op's bf.
Excellent stories! The background music is a bit too loud though imo.
Baby mama/wife story- NTA. Baby mama hooked up with a married man and said man stuck with his wife. Somehow side chick is pissed? That’s her stepchild now. Women really need to take accountability for the men they have kids with. Lol no wonder sexism exists
Yuuup, this.
Uhhh no they were divorced 4 years
What? They were not married when he and the ex got together. They had been divorced for over 4 years and got back together after he broke up with the ex because she was pregnant. Literary and comprehension skills are important skills to learn.
Damn this take screams "pick me". While the ex girlfriend is off her rocker you got the facts wrong. Also sexism exists because people with small minds like you. Go touch grass my guy.
@@madlie2452 He broke up with her because she was apparently toxic to him, not because she got pregnant.
Im allergic to mushroom and banana my mom made me a hummingbird cake for my birthday. It's a banana cake she knew I was allergic thanks mom 😒
11:38 ah yes, mother should totally be deprived of her kid because her ex and his partner are assholes...thats so very logical....wow....
Ask your friends how they would have felt if they watched you Being wheeled out by an ambulance?
Story 1 and update. OP NTA. Even though I am not a parent, drinking alcohol at a child's bday is very dangerous and not normal. Also i dont see how any of those stories Op's shared were funny they sounded more heartbroken and her being insensitive for what she was calling OP. OP you handled the situation maturally. I am do glad you talked with your Stepdad and that he took this seriously. i am glad he gives you love and affirmation. As you saw, it was very important that you told him your side of the story since all he had was your mom's. I also think it was important that you had told him about the drinking. I know people won't stop drinking without wanting to stop themselves But your mom is putting you and your half sibling in danger. Your step dad has a responsibility to protect both you and the youngest no matter how much he might love your mom.
Glad he is supporting you going NC with your mom. I hope your able to still have good relationship with half sister and step dad and be there for each other. Hope your therapy will help. But also remember, you and half sister are the children. mom, bio dad and stepdad are the adults., They shouldnt be forcing their problems onto you.. i hope the nc will help you heal.
Story 1: sounds like your Bio dad leave wasnt because he was a POS, looks like Mom was
Story 3-YTA. There was no need for you to be in there while the baby momma was drugged up. Sounds like Op wanted to make a point that she was back with the husband
But how if she didn’t insist on being there ?
Story 2. OP NTA. But the host 😅is a massive YTA and I wouldn't be friends with her or feel it a big loss. She knows you have medical conditions, asthma and allergies but thinks you are faking it. Doesn't sound like a safe person to be around or someone who cares about your health. BUT it isn't her responsibility to carry your inhaler. Now you did the right thing by telling her your list of allergies ahead of time so plans could be made. It was her job to tell you whether she preferred you to bring your own food or if she would exclude those things that you were allergic too. Yeah it does add extra time to the meal prep but it is better to have that than causing someone to have an allergic reaction and make them go to the hospital. OP should have asked if any of her allergies were in the food before eating. But i can't blame op for being mad at the friend and calling her a monster. I would be even madder at her for thinking allergies are something to joke about and not take seriously. The friend could have just told OP to bring some safe food to the party. It wasn't like she wasn't told about the allergies. OP dump that gal and all who are giving you crap.if they can't. See what she did was wrong on so many levels, then their not safe people to be around. But please remember to ask about the food before ever eating anything..
Story 1 - haha because childhood neglect is so super funny. Telling people you didn't try hard for your first child with your child in the room listening to these stories is hilarious. 🤦 And it's super classy to get drunk at a child's birthday party. I'd pray for op's younger sibling at this point.
Story 2 - Press charges or block them all and get new friends. I can't believe people are more upset at op vs the idiot that tried to test her allergies.
Story 3 - I'd only feel sympathy if this woman was led on. If he told her he wasn't looking for anything serious that's on her. This drama flabbergasted me. It's not op's fault she got dumped as soon as she got knocked up. She's directing all of her anger at the wrong person here.
Story 4 - poor girl. She's clearly acting up in response to the fact that nobody wants her and she's been clearly abandoned by everyone in the family. It sounds like a lose lose situation but it's not a situation that op created. NTA.
With the story about trying to get the parents to stop fighting, id probably call that a bitter sweet memory. Your child cares that much…but he also absolutely SHOULD NOT. Id be both happy and sad about it.
Mom still sucks though for making light of it
Story 1 is alarming 😢.
Story 3- 'But it was for support' ...😅😅😅
And?
CPS is not the devil's helpers. They are good people.
They are people, like any others. They are just as likely to be good, bad, or neutral. Just as likely to be corrupt, to be manipulative, to be biased or prejudiced or even bigoted (e.g. might be more likely to take kids away from a stable gay relationship 'cuz oh no the gays, we can't let gays have the kids), and so forth. So while some of them are good people, some of them are monsters, and you can't tell ahead of time which ones will be involved with your situation.
On top of that, CPS is under-funded and under-staffed, and they need to follow certain regulations that might or might not be good. They're dealing with too many cases with not enough people or time. They're placing kids with foster parents who might be good people or might be monsters and, again, you can't tell which you're dealing with until it's too late -- the monsters are good at hiding within the system.
So I understand why some people are leery of getting CPS involved. But in some cases it's honestly the best choice, or the only option, and a lot of kids have gone through foster care and come out the other side with a positive experience (though of course there's always trauma from any situation where you're removed from your parents).
No they really aren't
Story 1 - OP NTA - Here is a funny story for you to share at the next family event... "Isn't it funny how some parents think that they are "better" parents once they have a second child, right mom?, Isn't it hilarious?" It is disgusting that your so-called mother thinks that is funny to make fun of your firstborn painful and sad childhood memories and experiences. As a mother, if I were in that group listening to your so-called mother, I would ask her... hey, what is so funny about that story, can you explain so I can get the "joke"? OP, good on you for putting your SF on notice and for putting some distance between you and your toxic so-called mother.
Story 3: The "baby mama" did nothing wrong-- she dated OP's husband years after he and Op's marriage dissolved; and expected to stay with him during her pregnancy. If she's toxic, not cool; but OP never gave reasons on how-- and, regardless, her behavior in this situation is completely justified. No one would want the woman who replaced their place in their baby daddy's life to show up at the hospital especially post a traumatic medical situation, doped up. Maybe NAH; but OP brushing her concerns aside the entire story makes me think she left out crucial dynamics to paint the situation in her favor.
Replaced her where? The OP came first for 10 years and is the mother of his three kids that came before this baby. Even if they never got back together she was always going to be apart of his life. I had to add that no one was replaced in this situation relationships end every day. She has every right to not want the OP there and to set reasonable boundaries. But she’s going to have to suck it up buttercup for her child or else her life will be nothing but drama, chaos, and toxicity.
@@TheMelodicDreams Except they were separated without meaning to reconcile for three-four years. In that time, OP's ex dated and eventually/accidentally impregnated this new woman: hence, not a mistress. She then has to juggle that hurt (which is unfair of her to take out on OP, true); but it has nothing to do with THIS particular event. In this case, It's her choice who sees her after a medical procedure, just as everyone on Reddit would agree if OP were the one who had given birth and the ex and his wife dropped in and saw her drugged up.
Last time I had a baby there was no waiting room on the maternity floor, 'baby daddy' wanted OP there for support as it was a emegency birth. "Dad' was a wreck not knowing if the baby momma was going to live or die, or what was happening with the kid THAT was why OP was there. OP didn't say anything, simply sat there offering physical, and emotional support for her BF. It was going to be akward no matter what.
Should she have left the minute they knew everything was ok? And waited in the lobby or in her car to give the soon to be hubby a ride home? Probably, maybe, but I don't think OP was the AH for being there for the BF who was having to deal with the family of the 'toxic ex', and an emotional wreck after that scary text "medical complications / emergency c-section" He needed some one there on HIS side holding HIS hand and helping him through it, and he was NOT going to get it from "baby momma's" family.
OP didn't make it WORSE by being all up in their business, or being a 'Karen' demanding this or that. She sat there quitely, simply to support HIM.
Baby momma is toxic for thinking OP "stole" the baby daddy from her.... They broke up at LEAST a month or better before OP and he got back together. And we don't know how far along the preg was, or how long OP and BF/ soon to be hubby have been dating when baby momma had the kid.
He was never HERS to steal... OP is going to have to completely stay away from pick up and drop off's with this woman, and block the baby momma on her phone and all social accounts. They are going to need to do everything through the courts and a mediator or app. It's going to be messy, and I hope OP is up for it.
@@Cynthea_Leeas someone who was abused for merely sitting quietly existing, this Story is just whoa.
story 1: that "mother" is an absolute terrible Charlie Ultra November Tango of a human, she isnt even worthy of the moniker of "mother", im betting you she'll try and do something to the stepdad because he supported op
Story 3: OP is the 🍑🕳️. U can come but should of stayed in the loby
Ummm...Didn't you already cover that first story, in a previous video?
IDK how commenters think CPS works, but that girl will NOT be getting the help she needs in 90% of foster situations. She'll be labeled as a "problem child", not get taken in by any good homes, and possibly end up in juvie, on the streets, or dead before she's 18. I'm not saying OP has to take her in, but being involved in some way helps her actually get help and may even protect her from abuse. Even just emails or phone calls so people know someone will notice her missing. Foster children are preyed on because they are isolated and vulnerable. Again, don't take her in if you can't, just...maybe recognize the truth of the situation.
Story 1 I was also the practice child. First of 6. I survived 😂 but then of course parentfies. No wonser didn't want chuldren had the exp. No regrets am old bow but like these stories as see others' similar things Ah well that's life.
I make fun of my friends allergies, but the thing is I also make fun of my diabetes. No, I dont think my friend is faking it and I think he would die if he got exposed to some of the stuff he is allergic to, Like, some stuff might just rash him, other stuff is like instant death. He can even feel that someone ate some types of fruit in the same room from how he is sensitive to it. Had he been like this to mushrooms and actually ate it, he would die. Allergies are no joke. Its literal poison. personally, few people in mu life told me I should exercise and mediatate my diabetes away (usually due to lack of understanding), but people with allergies literally cant catch a break. Now I know why he has ocd like behavior as who knows who will one day decide to "test" your allergy. Thee was even a post about MIL killing her own granddaughter. Diabetes feels like nothing compared to that.
In the 2nd story, if the OP could "sense" there were mushrooms in the food, why didn't they ask the other guests if they could taste mushrooms?
Or say to Leia, “ these look like mushrooms. Are you sure they aren’t mushrooms? Okay if they aren’t mushrooms then what are they?”
Maybe because she trusted her friend to not poison her.
The friends would have lied to OP!
Story 1: NTA, OP, times 100000(100000000). Your Mom is a drunk and probably has been for a while. Drunks don't have a filter between their brain and their mouth so I'm sure that she's been saying hurtful things to and about you for a long time. It sounds like calling you her "practice kid" was the straw that broke the camel's back and things that you are only "practicing" aren't for any other use, and she was trying to USE you for babysitting which is a too RESPONSIBLE duty for a person/thing that is only meant to be for practice. SHE CAN'T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS.
If she had been only "PRACTICING" when she made you, then she should have used protection OR ABSTINANCE.
People who actually get born are not "PRACTICE PEOPLE" or "Ooops babies". They're PEOPLE and they have all the rights to life, liberty, work, travel AND DIGNITY, that are granted to EVERYONE in the Constitution and Declaration of Independence. Those documents apply to EVERYONE EQUALLY and not just some old, drunk bags that set up children's parties as a cover for moaning about the kids that they didn't want or no longer want because that kid is inconvenient or not the latest model.
Unpopular opinion on the story about the wife showing up at the hospital but nta. The only reason the new baby mama cares is because she still wants him. I'd tell her to grow up. She's the actual idiot for dating a man still semi involved with his ex and being surprised when they get back together. Never date a man who's just separated or keeps fluttering around an ex wife like Pepe le pew around that black cat with a painted stripe.
Baby momma. OP, you weren't concerned about the baby. You just wanted to make sure you didn't lose your SO to her again
How do you know that? Are you a mind reader! OP was only there to support her husband and didn't interact with anyone else. She probably did the driving as the husband wasn't in the right mind to drive himself
Story 2 has a part cut out and you can tell just by listening to it and if you watch it you can see that it jumps to a different part of the story wtf how did you fuck it up