🔴 Go to meetfabric.com/rmrs and apply today in just 10 minutes, risk free. Protect your family today with Fabric by Gerber Life. Thanks Fabric for sponsoring! ➡ruclips.net/video/Ex4uPLDzDok/видео.html - Click here to watch The Men's Mental Health Crisis (10 Brutal Truths You Can't Ignore). ➡ ruclips.net/video/ogkO3FfmD4U/видео.html - 13 Brutal Truths Men 30+ Need to Hear to Live Their Best Life.
In reference to gaming: Read the book ‘Assassination Generation’ by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman. (And if you’re wondering why I’m here, it’s because Antonio makes great videos-but also, my husband and I have a great relationship because I like to understand him and be a part of making his life better.)
Bad habit : basically the screen time. Linked with another bad habit : going to bed too late and not getting 8 hours of sleep. This resulted in me being low energy, therefore weaker against stress, feeling down and accomplishing less. I've been fixing this for 2 weeks and I am already feeling a lot happier and more energetic.
I battled with alcohol for 10+ years. I couldn’t reach my fitness goals and I finally gave it up. I never want to go back. I love what I see in the mirror now
The fact that this video doesn't have millions of views is sad. But the fact that it has any gives me hope. Thank you brother. Hearing another man say this out loud is a huge inspiration.
Relaxation : Prayer, meditation, hiking, music, gun range. Bad experiences: Too many to list. Bad habits : every bad habit, once vanquished, had the same questions/realization "Why didn't I kick this sooner? Why did I do this in the first place? " and " That was easier to get over than I thought- it just took putting one foot in front of the other, over and over again."
Many of these hot home for me... Im currently taking steps to change all of it. Removing so many bad habits is tough, and withdrawal is a bitch but i know I can achieve what I want this years Stay strong kings 👑
I see video games like alcohol. I personally don’t drink, never have in my entire life. However I really enjoy playing video games. I see it as my personal vice. A little treat to reward myself after a full week of working hard
I find the first step in beating bad habits is to do a deep dive and ask yourself why you have that habit. I found I was only drinking after 8:00 p.m. and I realized it was because I was attempting to calm down. I had no desire to drink during the daytime, but yet I drink two glasses of whiskey every night upon my realization why I was drinking, I instantly quit.
It takes a lot of courage to share your own vices and shortcomings. That is why I love this channel. Antonio is so relatable and is so down to earth. That is why I am a die hard fan of his channel.
My worst addiction was alcohol. I quit cold turkey after some very stupid mistakes. It was not the easiest thing for me to do and it was hard and took a lot of work. I have been sober now for over 8 years. It is one of the best things I have done in my life
Dear Antonio I have been able to be a subscriber to your channel since 2015 as a homeless man I have watched plenty of your videos and you really inspired me to push hard to get out of this situation and I thank you for all of your videos that don't concern fashion
Kicked the fast food crutch, got my caffeine consumption down 90%, however struggling to quit smoking. I already gave up alcohol a year ago. And my little step forward is putting myself into social situations that are intensely awkward for me. It's getting easier with practice though and I'm planning to propose an event I want to organize to a board of directors within a couple of months. I'm amazed I'm not in a constant state of panic, honestly.
My favorite outlet for controlling my emotions and mental: Martial arts. I’ve been training Muay Thai for the last 2 years, and it has shown me so much about myself. I even have one amateur fight under my belt, and I’m planning on more. Muay Thai has both humbled me and blessed me in so many ways. Muay Thai turned me into a better person in all aspects. No matter your age, try out martial arts!!
Just realized thanks to this that alot of people feel they have very little choice about some decisions in their lives but prioritizing will show just how much they can do. 👍 Thanks
What helps me from exploding in anger is considering the times I have seen my friends and family explode in anger and how silly they looked and felt after. It's not a perfect system, but it keeps me from allowing my anger to do something silly 9 times out of 10.
Hey now, if I know her, don't have a chance and she is a dime, I reserve the right... But really IG & OF simps are self sabotaging their ability to date.
Going on instagram in general has always been unexplainable. I've asked people what they learn on there and none of them can give me an answer. People are literally automatic fat zombies who don't even know why they do most of the activities they do.
This is a great video, Antonio. Some of these points hit close to home for me. I make it a point to not do any heavy gaming during the work week. It is so easy to say, "one more round," or, "I gotta know what happens next," or, "I bet I'll get it this time!" And the next thing you know, it is three in the morning and you start work in three hours. My fellow gamers know exactly where I am coming from! With the push for natural ingredients, marketing takes advantage of this by saying, "made with REAL sugar!" Too much of anything can be bad, right? The addiction to sugar and processed foods is a real thing! It is something that I have made great strides in, going from eating fast food every workday (sometimes multiple times a day) to less than five times a month! Reducing sugar intake can be a step in the right direction in improving health. Sometimes the best that any of us can do is baby steps. But baby steps still progress, so do not stop. Everyone is human. Love that reminder because putting people on pedestals makes everyone involved unequal. 🐺🔧
I dont worry about things I can't control. I just accepted them. For things I can control but something doesn’t go as planned, I forgive myself and try to do better next time. I also don't suppress my emotions- I feel and accept them, then move forward when im ready.
I live in NYC, so I usually go for a walk through Manhattan, other times when I'm stressed I have to get out of the City, I'll go hiking up state NY, lately I been going to Southern Connecticut along the shoreline. I realized I'm not a city person so planning on moving to CT.
I’m a cold turkey guy and it’s like most of the time, if it’s not in the house it’s not a problem. As for gaming, I found that the games that tend to show addictive behaviors are the ones mostly multiplayer and/or competitive. Most single player ones, offer an end like a movie or something, which helps. Whenever the content is “infinite”, like social media or multiplayer games, you always gotta pay attention to that addiction
I love how you are so straight up, honest, and open with us. Not afraid to be vulnerable. I like how you brought up your anger issues because I suffer from the same things. I appear super calm and reserved to most people but one little thing could make me snap. Always appreciate your tips and stories.
The range is a great way to relax. Taking the time to slow your breathing down and concentrating on placing the round wear you want it relaxes most of the muscles in your body.
You are wrong about your beautiful wife losing her beauty when she ages. Her beauty just changes. When I look at my 76 year old wife, I still think,"wow!"
For keeping myself emotionally in check, I have found that journaling is a great habit that works for me. Sometimes just writing stuff down puts it in perspective and helps me to see that it wasn't really that big of deal even if at the time it felt like a huge deal. For me I work on learning foreign languages, and yes I understand it does not sound hard, except for me mastering a language is probably the hardest 15 to 30 minutes I spend each day.
About controlling emotions, what works for me is basically breathing. A couple of years ago I suffered some anxiety crises and developing my breathing capabilities was key to solve it. Now it is a great tool to be used whenever I need control.
I suffered through poverty in the first half of my life. The winter before I graduated high school, I lived in a house without heat or insulation. I would wake up in my bed with frost on my blanket and get to take a shower and walk to my bus stop by 6:30. Talk about building character!
It's not really pain and suffering, but I always feel better after some strenuous physical labor. Mowing the grass, yard work, helping someone move, etc.
I’ve recently found your channel. I love everything about it! You’re truly an inspiration to many men all over! You mentioned delicacy of life. I have lost my entire family that I was born into. I’ve had so much hurt and trauma that I’ve inspired others to value their family.
I have always had a bad temper. It takes lots to push me there...but when I get mad I blow up. So I find that exercise really helps me. It coule be doing a workout in my home gym or a bike ride, walk or a jog...it's all a great way for me to relieve stress. I hate losing my temper because I always feel horrible after. So now I workout every morning for a half hour and try to get out in the evening for a walk. It helps keep me even tempered and calm.
Great video Antonio. This is a real crisis in our society. Without competent men who have learned how to work in the real world, we will all lose big time.
As for me, I've never had an issue with anger, and since I started working I've never had an issue with terror or panic, and thank God I've never struggled with depression; but what has got me is loneliness and procrastination, which are two sides of the same coin for me. It's a bit of a cycle for me: I don't hate myself, I think I'm alright, but I do like to have people around to have expectations of me; this lack of external accountability has made it harder for me to catch myself slipping, and when I slip it makes me less confident and less attractive, which compounds my loneliness. I will get over it but it sucks, especially when other things in life aren't going so great either, like my company running out of operating capital, a demand crunch for software engineers, etc. I am grateful that I have never been all that prone to addiction, that I was born reasonably handsome and without any clinical heritable diseases or deformities; but this also comes with a lot of self criticism, and a sense that I should be doing better. P.S. I think the ‘everybody poops’ talk on pedestalization is great.
My parents seperated when i was young avout 14. My mother lied my whole teenage years to me and my brother about our father so we wouldn't talk to him. She allowed us to do everything we wanted because she wanted to be the cool parent. She wouldn't work, many days we were hungry. In the winters cold because we didn't have the means to get the wood. I slipped into alcohol and drugs. My saviour was my daughter and my father who never gave up on me. Looking back it was pretty harsh and hard, but it made me into the man i am today. Thats why i cherish every moment today, compared to back then i live in pure luxury.
I’m at war with soda at the moment and the vending machine in my apt complex. I stopped carbs and sugar over the last 2 weeks and have switched to one large Carnivore meal a day. When that sweets dragon rears his head, I mix an ounce of Apple Cider Vinegar, 4 ounces lemon juice, and Water all in a 16 oz glass. The sour/bitter flavor gets me past the sweet urges.
Wow. My last ex boyfriend had all these issues. Especially gaming. I'm a gamer myself so I'm not knocking gaming in general, but when you use it to escape reality all the time and not take care of yourself, it exacerbates any other issues you have going on. I also agree with the comment about the line between gaming and gambling being so blurred in the last handful of years. I specifically don't play any games with loot crates or gatcha boxes or those free-to-play-pay-to-win games. I don't mind the idea of a subscription for an MMORPG or the occasional skin/outfit. However, people can potentially drop some serious coin on those games and not realize it. (Coin that could be going towards keeping the lights on and a roof over your head at the very least.)
Gaming is VERY destructive if it becomes an addiction or obsession. I fell into that in my mid-20s by becoming obsessed with World of Warcraft - I became the fabled fat slob WoW guy on that legendary South Park episode over 4-5 years. I had a great girlfriend, but she ended up kicking me to the curb. I was having a great time, completely oblivious to a badly failing relationship with a great woman. It's one of my biggest regrets and it probably always will be no matter what happens. I still game to this day, but I've learned (the hard way) to moderate it. Whatever quest your avatar is on in a game is nothing compared to the quest of your life. Great content, Antonio, men badly need to hear these things, but there is one glaring omission from the list... one of the most brutal things keeping men weak, something men (particularly young men) need to hear and understand, one of the easiest traps to fall into for a man: porn addiction/obsession. I'm not sure if you've addressed this problem, but it's truly an epidemic at this point. It'd be great to see a full video from you on the topic.
I really love this channel, I recently graduated with my bachelors and have been a farmer most of my life. I have been binging Antonio’s videos since I recently got a job at a college and need to look professional. These videos are not only informative, but I never feel like I’m being talked down to or that my upbringing and financial state makes fashion inaccessible. Thank you so much for these vids, God bless you and your family!
I cold turkey quit coffee and the benefits I've gotten especially from sleep has made me not want to even drink a cup in order to avoid the ramifications that come with withdrawal symptoms.
In relation to the pain, I was diagnosed with ostio arthritis at the age of 27. This forced me to take a deep look at myself. Do I become this diagnosis and give up on my career and life goals. Sit down and feel sorry for myself? Or do I find different ways to live life? A major part of that is mental health and resilliance. Reframe the thinking from things you can't do to what you can do. Give yourself space to allow your emotions, to be angry, happy, sad and cry. This does not make you a lesser man, it makes you a better one.
Gun range is good to alleviate stress. Same with the archery range. It’s focus, breathing, and putting metal down range. Running also helps. I also pray a lot. That usually works best for me. Many times, I’ll run and pray to get the energy out and talk to God about what’s going on.
My nephews socialize with friends via gaming...it freaks my brother-in-law out because they don't seem to try and date girls they are interested in. I like to game, but using Oculus I roll that into a workout. Cut streaming services...they are costly and suck up time. When you are 80 you can go back and watch these shows. Sugar is poison and was borderline diabetic when I cut back and restored my health. Was drinking like a fish during lockdown, the hangovers were rough, and now Canadian guidelines are 2 per week, which makes sense.
Regarding phones, soda, coffee, fat and sugar, and alcohol, I think it’s important to realize if you have a problem or not. These can be fine in moderation, and yes, moderation isn’t exciting, but there is no need to put energy into something that isn’t a problem. The key is understanding if any of these things are standing in the way of your goals, and if they are, take care of them.
The gun range is absolutely the meditative thing for me and helps so much with my emotions. I also definitely avoid pain and suffering, gotta work on that too
I started with a simple at home workout using a app. I noticed the more disciplined I was with one routine,the more disciplined I was with more parts of my life.
I know I'm a little late to the party, but I figured I'd share a bit of my perspective here. For my emotions, I try to isolate myself in a quiet place, listen to some music that will help me understand what I am feeling and why I am feeling this way. And then as my release, I try to create something--painting, sculpting, carving, drawing. If not this, I go to the gym and work out until I collapse on the floor to get everything out. In my mornings, I wake up and force myself into the shower, which I always end with about a minute of ice-cold water (I live in the mountains of Vermont, so I mean ice-cold). This one choice I make every morning not only gives me the clarity I need to make decisions throughout the day, but it also shows me a mindset of "just start the thing you hate, and you're halfway there."
for me, ive found that the first step to healthy self control is accepting yourself and your feelings. feeling things is ok, acting on them often isnt. learning to recognize those situations. ive gotten pretty good at allowing my emotions, like anger, to have their say, but halting myself at the point of action. if you try to not listen to your emotions just makes them more insistent as time goes on. for me its better to ride it out, think about what i want to do, and usually pretty quickly ill start thinking about the consequences of those actions, and next thing you know im calm. allow yourself time to think things thru before reacting. and know yourself, know how your going to react in any given situation , and learn to identify the more negative reactions you have. be honest with yourself, you dont do yourself any favors by trying to lie to yourself.
The last 3-4 minutes of this video is GOLD. I loved how you shared that us women are just human beings. I make a lot of mistakes. And I’m not at an A+ game everyday. Great advice to not put people on pedestals. I also loved how you shared your personal experiences and mistakes.
Cold turkey, tasty on sandwiches. When I got back from Hawaii end of October 2021 I went on a strict ketogenic diet and started off with a 5-day fast. I lost 80lbs in less than a year. I recently put some weight back on from a vacation, but I'm back to working it off.
Mr. Centeno, dont know what years you were with 3/1 but I was with 2/1 in 2010 when we went to Afghan. Good ol Camp Horno and that black cloud eh lol?!?! I was a Corpsman actually and absolutely loved every minute with you devil dogs. Stay safe out there!
Great video and something everyone should be aware of. Check your screen time, even if it is on 'useful' productivity things on your phone, and realize it is changing your behavior.
For me, mastering my emotions is multifactorial. Aside from the well known- lots of quality, sleep, good nutrition and supplements, very little alcohol, and exercise, it's also about knowing that all daily stressors (social, financial, physical, and mental) drain our ability to control our emotions. So with that understanding, knowing when to relax, and do activities that replenish you is key. This could be more sleep, watching a Netflix movie, exercise, walk in the park, yoga, prayer--- whatever it is, as long as YOU feel that you're "batteries" are being charged. Also, understand that decisions I make when I'm "drained" will result in bad decisions. I forgot what book I got this from because I read lots of personal development books.
This hit for me. Screen time BIGGG TIME for me. I watch wayyy too much RUclips and I’ve never been like this. I have to find a way to put my damn phone down and do the stuff I need to do. Also I’m a cold turkey guy.
I have been in a bad relationship with a girl for a long time and that has affected me a lot. I don't know how to get away from her and every time she talks to me I lose control of my emotions. Even though I want everything to go well, I just get desperate and don't know what to do. It could be called dependency, poor control of emotions, but every time I walk away I feel like I'm making a bad decision.
There are some good tools to help with the emotion thing. There is a hack for your limbic system that can help when you're getting angered or emotion is starting to take over. Do a math problem in your head. It will turn on the rational part of your brain and immediately disconnect the angry monkey/primitive side. I do it quite often, especially in traffic.
For me, one of my main answers to dealing with emotions and to what hard things men should experience are the same. Now, my first answer to dealing with emotions is that I always look as hard as I can at why I feel that way, which sounds obvious, but when paired with opinions that you've formed over a lot of thought, you can much more easily dismiss certain emotions or know when you believe you should ignore them, and that's my answer for both questions: sometimes you have to simply endure, even when your emotions are going wild. Of course you should do this when you know you'll be able to control yourself, when it won't ultimately make the emotions worse, etc. but sometimes what you need to do when your emotions aren't obeying logic is to ignore them until they start to get better. Just let that mental pathway die so it can be replaced by a new one. This can also of course give you an opportunity to do something better than what you would've done if you let the emotion affect your behavior, whether that's getting something done or even if it's as simple as making conversation at a get-together while having a mild panic attack (that's probably the most extreme case where I've done this.) I think the most important thing is to have goals to motivate getting through an emotion, whether it's building relationships as best you can in the middle of a panic attack, treating someone with respect, love, or kindness even when you're angry or exhausted, or just getting something done no matter how you happen to feel, if it's important to you you'll be much more able to push through and improve not only your emotions, but your self-control.
My release is when I bowl. I have so much anxiety because of my Asperger's that it is hard for me to calm down. To bowl good, i must have a calm approach or I mess up my shots. As I bowl more, I get better and learn how to control my emotions. My highest average now in bowling is 217 and loving the ability to improve as I know I can. Now to just get my other five leagues up to that average as well.
I've always had a natural ability to stop things cold turkey or very little help. Stopped drinking smoking and a whole host of bad habits at an early age. The decision to do it is the most difficult part. Most if not all habits are mental. Wether you want to stop or start a new one. Most people don't have a clue what it takes to really change something. It's one thing and one day at a time. No worries. Take care ladies and gentlemen.
I go through cycles of downloading games, being addicted for weeks then cold turkey cutting them out, then a few months later it happens again. This happens with all my vices as well, how do other people break these cycles??
One mental, one physical. Reading a specific book, X pages or chapters a day, ESPECIALLY when the reading gets boring or frustrating. A morning 5K every other day, bonus pride if you do back to back days or extra loops.
It's excellent that Antionio is adding leg raises. We Want our clothes to fit and look their best. Most dudes do curls and bench but still have fat stomachs. Leg raises contribute to the V shape torso and a flat stomach. Adding ab related leg exercises besides just curling and pressing weights is crucial to the silhouette. Bicycle kicks, leg raises and crunches benifit in this way also
Antonio you are very good. I like your style first (you are very stylish and I like that). You saying great stuff. I've many videos of your stuff. You give me great guidance to fix me. Thank you very much.
I gave up gaming many years ago. Waste of time. And Violent video desensitize you to violence and that will make you ok with seeing violence and you won't care about it anymore. Your love for others starts diminishing because your so ok with being violent in video games. And some people do become violent. Out of the heart come your true desires.
I am definitely a cold turkey kind of man, as challenging and crazy that it may sounds i am. I want to just approach it and rid of it head on to get it over with. I am fortunate to have found this channel and catching up with a recent video such as this one, cause I’ve recently got rid of alcohol going on first week this Saturday, my older brother is a former Marine and I often get advice but him being a president of a corporation he’s very busy. I have learned how to breath, meditate and I’ve always worked out to keep my brain from a fog. I thank you for your content for I’m going in a new direction as far as career and i want to get back to the times when i really dressed for success, however my body transformation is becoming challenging as it’s changing rapidly.
I think I understand the level headed till your not level headed thing. Many of us, myself included stay pretty level, the daily frustrations just get put in a box, then one day something or someone rips the box open. I usually go a decade between release events but I am sure this cannot be healthy, especially for the recipient. Better to address things calmly as they arise than end up with a box full of dynamite perhaps. Dynamite is so much more fun though I have to admit.
The gaming addiction is not only weakening but it can be expensive beyond belief. For instance, a good video card to put in your computer allowing for great game playing typically costs $400 or more. That money could be more wisely spent on something which allows you achieve more and become more accomplished. Worse yet, if all you put into yourself are video games, will you ever think of yourself as more than a master gamer? While that may be important in some circles, life in general couldn't care less about how many virtual enemies you kill.
About #6 - last year a former colleague of mine took me hiking twice to Vitosha Mountain(in Bulgaria) - the first time on the way back we went through the Stone river there which is basically a path made of rocks, which separated from the mountain. I almost s**t my pants going across them because on the one side there's literally a fall down the mountain and it's really uneven when going through. The second hike was 25 000+ steps on rough terrain, which took us around 4 hours with a lunch break in the middle. As I am not too active of a person it was really challenging for me, but oh man - throwing my phone away for a whole day and the utter physical exhaustion was terrific. Definitely recommend it to anybody, but if you are scared, that you might not be able to do that - try official trails through forests or around a mountain(we call them here "eco trails"), which don't have too steep parts. Wish you all a great and exciting new year!
My dear sir, I have been watching your videos since pretty much the beginning and you’ve thought me a great deal about mens style and a few life hacks (d.e.c). I always thought that you had AAaLL together and that everything was just flowing for you. It now shows that we are much alike: I have been addicted to coke cola since 2010 and also have had anger issues. Those pretty much go hand in glove. Thank you so much for sharing this and also in your mental health video. It shows that no one is immune to the challenges of life. What changed for me with the anger is that I got a new gf and job that didn’t know that side of me and I simply didn’t want to be that person anymore. Ask: is this really something to be angry about?
🔴 Go to meetfabric.com/rmrs and apply today in just 10 minutes, risk free. Protect your family today with Fabric by Gerber Life. Thanks Fabric for sponsoring!
➡ruclips.net/video/Ex4uPLDzDok/видео.html - Click here to watch The Men's Mental Health Crisis (10 Brutal Truths You Can't Ignore).
➡ ruclips.net/video/ogkO3FfmD4U/видео.html - 13 Brutal Truths Men 30+ Need to Hear to Live Their Best Life.
Was this one long ad orrrrrrrrrrrr what?
Antonio Ur awesome 💪👏✌️
"We like it, we love it, we want some more of it. Make it hurt Drill Sgt, make it hurt"
In reference to gaming:
Read the book ‘Assassination Generation’ by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman.
(And if you’re wondering why I’m here, it’s because Antonio makes great videos-but also, my husband and I have a great relationship because I like to understand him and be a part of making his life better.)
The biggest reason I hit like is because he’s not just lecturing us but sharing his struggles too. It’s relatable and helps motivate me more.
dude totally gets it. 💪
Yeah, the dude is showing humanity.
The title gave me toxic A.T vibes at first, but I'm glad I actually watched the video
Im a female and a high school teacher and i must say: thats exactly what Young men need these days. Im going to recommend your Channel to my student.
Bad habit : basically the screen time. Linked with another bad habit : going to bed too late and not getting 8 hours of sleep. This resulted in me being low energy, therefore weaker against stress, feeling down and accomplishing less. I've been fixing this for 2 weeks and I am already feeling a lot happier and more energetic.
Serious
Yep, that's my problem. I'm going to bed earlier tonight. Thank you.
I battled with alcohol for 10+ years. I couldn’t reach my fitness goals and I finally gave it up. I never want to go back. I love what I see in the mirror now
The world has neglected men. I’m glad you took it upon yourself to address men and help rebuild men’s glory.
The fact that this video doesn't have millions of views is sad. But the fact that it has any gives me hope. Thank you brother. Hearing another man say this out loud is a huge inspiration.
Relaxation : Prayer, meditation, hiking, music, gun range. Bad experiences: Too many to list. Bad habits : every bad habit, once vanquished, had the same questions/realization "Why didn't I kick this sooner? Why did I do this in the first place? " and " That was easier to get over than I thought- it just took putting one foot in front of the other, over and over again."
Many of these hot home for me... Im currently taking steps to change all of it. Removing so many bad habits is tough, and withdrawal is a bitch but i know I can achieve what I want this years
Stay strong kings 👑
I see video games like alcohol. I personally don’t drink, never have in my entire life.
However I really enjoy playing video games. I see it as my personal vice. A little treat to reward myself after a full week of working hard
I find the first step in beating bad habits is to do a deep dive and ask yourself why you have that habit. I found I was only drinking after 8:00 p.m. and I realized it was because I was attempting to calm down. I had no desire to drink during the daytime, but yet I drink two glasses of whiskey every night upon my realization why I was drinking, I instantly quit.
2 weeks later, everyone in your class is all of sudden incredibly fashionable haha
It takes a lot of courage to share your own vices and shortcomings. That is why I love this channel. Antonio is so relatable and is so down to earth. That is why I am a die hard fan of his channel.
My worst addiction was alcohol. I quit cold turkey after some very stupid mistakes. It was not the easiest thing for me to do and it was hard and took a lot of work. I have been sober now for over 8 years. It is one of the best things I have done in my life
@@theronj man I thought I was reading my old life also! 7 years myself! May the wind always be at your back, and the sun in your face!
Dear Antonio I have been able to be a subscriber to your channel since 2015 as a homeless man I have watched plenty of your videos and you really inspired me to push hard to get out of this situation and I thank you for all of your videos that don't concern fashion
Wow, thank you
Kicked the fast food crutch, got my caffeine consumption down 90%, however struggling to quit smoking. I already gave up alcohol a year ago. And my little step forward is putting myself into social situations that are intensely awkward for me. It's getting easier with practice though and I'm planning to propose an event I want to organize to a board of directors within a couple of months. I'm amazed I'm not in a constant state of panic, honestly.
My favorite outlet for controlling my emotions and mental: Martial arts. I’ve been training Muay Thai for the last 2 years, and it has shown me so much about myself. I even have one amateur fight under my belt, and I’m planning on more. Muay Thai has both humbled me and blessed me in so many ways. Muay Thai turned me into a better person in all aspects. No matter your age, try out martial arts!!
Can Boxing do it aswell
In the year 2021 I purchased a diy guitar kit build with a Bigsby whammy bar. On St. Patrick’s Day in 2023, I finally completed building it…almost
Addiction is really hard man, it feels impossible to stop even if I knew it's messing my body up
Just realized thanks to this that alot of people feel they have very little choice about some decisions in their lives but prioritizing will show just how much they can do. 👍 Thanks
What helps me from exploding in anger is considering the times I have seen my friends and family explode in anger and how silly they looked and felt after. It's not a perfect system, but it keeps me from allowing my anger to do something silly 9 times out of 10.
I listen to music whenever I'm sad, mad, or irritated by others
Also stop subscribing to only fans.
Hey now, if I know her, don't have a chance and she is a dime, I reserve the right... But really IG & OF simps are self sabotaging their ability to date.
...but I'm sure they really like me. 🤑
Exactly
Going on instagram in general has always been unexplainable. I've asked people what they learn on there and none of them can give me an answer. People are literally automatic fat zombies who don't even know why they do most of the activities they do.
No.
This is a great video, Antonio. Some of these points hit close to home for me.
I make it a point to not do any heavy gaming during the work week. It is so easy to say, "one more round," or, "I gotta know what happens next," or, "I bet I'll get it this time!" And the next thing you know, it is three in the morning and you start work in three hours. My fellow gamers know exactly where I am coming from!
With the push for natural ingredients, marketing takes advantage of this by saying, "made with REAL sugar!" Too much of anything can be bad, right? The addiction to sugar and processed foods is a real thing! It is something that I have made great strides in, going from eating fast food every workday (sometimes multiple times a day) to less than five times a month! Reducing sugar intake can be a step in the right direction in improving health. Sometimes the best that any of us can do is baby steps. But baby steps still progress, so do not stop.
Everyone is human. Love that reminder because putting people on pedestals makes everyone involved unequal. 🐺🔧
I dont worry about things I can't control. I just accepted them. For things I can control but something doesn’t go as planned, I forgive myself and try to do better next time. I also don't suppress my emotions- I feel and accept them, then move forward when im ready.
I live in NYC, so I usually go for a walk through Manhattan, other times when I'm stressed I have to get out of the City, I'll go hiking up state NY, lately I been going to Southern Connecticut along the shoreline.
I realized I'm not a city person so planning on moving to CT.
I’m a cold turkey guy and it’s like most of the time, if it’s not in the house it’s not a problem. As for gaming, I found that the games that tend to show addictive behaviors are the ones mostly multiplayer and/or competitive. Most single player ones, offer an end like a movie or something, which helps. Whenever the content is “infinite”, like social media or multiplayer games, you always gotta pay attention to that addiction
I love how you are so straight up, honest, and open with us. Not afraid to be vulnerable. I like how you brought up your anger issues because I suffer from the same things. I appear super calm and reserved to most people but one little thing could make me snap. Always appreciate your tips and stories.
The range is a great way to relax. Taking the time to slow your breathing down and concentrating on placing the round wear you want it relaxes most of the muscles in your body.
You are wrong about your beautiful wife losing her beauty when she ages. Her beauty just changes. When I look at my 76 year old wife, I still think,"wow!"
For keeping myself emotionally in check, I have found that journaling is a great habit that works for me. Sometimes just writing stuff down puts it in perspective and helps me to see that it wasn't really that big of deal even if at the time it felt like a huge deal. For me I work on learning foreign languages, and yes I understand it does not sound hard, except for me mastering a language is probably the hardest 15 to 30 minutes I spend each day.
Congrats on the new child!!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉
About controlling emotions, what works for me is basically breathing. A couple of years ago I suffered some anxiety crises and developing my breathing capabilities was key to solve it. Now it is a great tool to be used whenever I need control.
I suffered through poverty in the first half of my life. The winter before I graduated high school, I lived in a house without heat or insulation. I would wake up in my bed with frost on my blanket and get to take a shower and walk to my bus stop by 6:30. Talk about building character!
It's not really pain and suffering, but I always feel better after some strenuous physical labor. Mowing the grass, yard work, helping someone move, etc.
I’ve recently found your channel. I love everything about it! You’re truly an inspiration to many men all over! You mentioned delicacy of life. I have lost my entire family that I was born into. I’ve had so much hurt and trauma that I’ve inspired others to value their family.
I have always had a bad temper. It takes lots to push me there...but when I get mad I blow up. So I find that exercise really helps me. It coule be doing a workout in my home gym or a bike ride, walk or a jog...it's all a great way for me to relieve stress. I hate losing my temper because I always feel horrible after. So now I workout every morning for a half hour and try to get out in the evening for a walk. It helps keep me even tempered and calm.
Great video Antonio. This is a real crisis in our society. Without competent men who have learned how to work in the real world, we will all lose big time.
As for me, I've never had an issue with anger, and since I started working I've never had an issue with terror or panic, and thank God I've never struggled with depression; but what has got me is loneliness and procrastination, which are two sides of the same coin for me. It's a bit of a cycle for me: I don't hate myself, I think I'm alright, but I do like to have people around to have expectations of me; this lack of external accountability has made it harder for me to catch myself slipping, and when I slip it makes me less confident and less attractive, which compounds my loneliness. I will get over it but it sucks, especially when other things in life aren't going so great either, like my company running out of operating capital, a demand crunch for software engineers, etc.
I am grateful that I have never been all that prone to addiction, that I was born reasonably handsome and without any clinical heritable diseases or deformities; but this also comes with a lot of self criticism, and a sense that I should be doing better.
P.S. I think the ‘everybody poops’ talk on pedestalization is great.
My parents seperated when i was young avout 14. My mother lied my whole teenage years to me and my brother about our father so we wouldn't talk to him. She allowed us to do everything we wanted because she wanted to be the cool parent. She wouldn't work, many days we were hungry. In the winters cold because we didn't have the means to get the wood.
I slipped into alcohol and drugs.
My saviour was my daughter and my father who never gave up on me.
Looking back it was pretty harsh and hard, but it made me into the man i am today. Thats why i cherish every moment today, compared to back then i live in pure luxury.
I’m at war with soda at the moment and the vending machine in my apt complex. I stopped carbs and sugar over the last 2 weeks and have switched to one large Carnivore meal a day. When that sweets dragon rears his head, I mix an ounce of Apple Cider Vinegar, 4 ounces lemon juice, and Water all in a 16 oz glass. The sour/bitter flavor gets me past the sweet urges.
Antonio is truly an internet dad for so many men. Those video was so helpful and inspirational
Wow. My last ex boyfriend had all these issues. Especially gaming. I'm a gamer myself so I'm not knocking gaming in general, but when you use it to escape reality all the time and not take care of yourself, it exacerbates any other issues you have going on. I also agree with the comment about the line between gaming and gambling being so blurred in the last handful of years. I specifically don't play any games with loot crates or gatcha boxes or those free-to-play-pay-to-win games. I don't mind the idea of a subscription for an MMORPG or the occasional skin/outfit. However, people can potentially drop some serious coin on those games and not realize it. (Coin that could be going towards keeping the lights on and a roof over your head at the very least.)
Gaming is VERY destructive if it becomes an addiction or obsession. I fell into that in my mid-20s by becoming obsessed with World of Warcraft - I became the fabled fat slob WoW guy on that legendary South Park episode over 4-5 years. I had a great girlfriend, but she ended up kicking me to the curb. I was having a great time, completely oblivious to a badly failing relationship with a great woman. It's one of my biggest regrets and it probably always will be no matter what happens.
I still game to this day, but I've learned (the hard way) to moderate it. Whatever quest your avatar is on in a game is nothing compared to the quest of your life.
Great content, Antonio, men badly need to hear these things, but there is one glaring omission from the list... one of the most brutal things keeping men weak, something men (particularly young men) need to hear and understand, one of the easiest traps to fall into for a man: porn addiction/obsession. I'm not sure if you've addressed this problem, but it's truly an epidemic at this point. It'd be great to see a full video from you on the topic.
As a woman I endorse these checklists for better health overall ✅
Damn! Antonio jumping right into video without the hook, pattern disruption or brand jingle
I actually like it. Getting to the point 📌
Great video. I'm going to uninstall those gaming apps.
I really love this channel, I recently graduated with my bachelors and have been a farmer most of my life. I have been binging Antonio’s videos since I recently got a job at a college and need to look professional. These videos are not only informative, but I never feel like I’m being talked down to or that my upbringing and financial state makes fashion inaccessible. Thank you so much for these vids, God bless you and your family!
I cold turkey quit coffee and the benefits I've gotten especially from sleep has made me not want to even drink a cup in order to avoid the ramifications that come with withdrawal symptoms.
That last one is so important and I think both men and women often make that mistake and it can be really negative in our lives as people
In relation to the pain, I was diagnosed with ostio arthritis at the age of 27. This forced me to take a deep look at myself. Do I become this diagnosis and give up on my career and life goals. Sit down and feel sorry for myself? Or do I find different ways to live life? A major part of that is mental health and resilliance. Reframe the thinking from things you can't do to what you can do.
Give yourself space to allow your emotions, to be angry, happy, sad and cry. This does not make you a lesser man, it makes you a better one.
Sugar: im a cold turkey guy, it takes 3 days to withdrawal from cravings. Less on keto. Although these days I'm substituting for sugar free options.
Gun range is good to alleviate stress. Same with the archery range. It’s focus, breathing, and putting metal down range. Running also helps.
I also pray a lot. That usually works best for me. Many times, I’ll run and pray to get the energy out and talk to God about what’s going on.
My nephews socialize with friends via gaming...it freaks my brother-in-law out because they don't seem to try and date girls they are interested in. I like to game, but using Oculus I roll that into a workout. Cut streaming services...they are costly and suck up time. When you are 80 you can go back and watch these shows. Sugar is poison and was borderline diabetic when I cut back and restored my health. Was drinking like a fish during lockdown, the hangovers were rough, and now Canadian guidelines are 2 per week, which makes sense.
Regarding phones, soda, coffee, fat and sugar, and alcohol, I think it’s important to realize if you have a problem or not. These can be fine in moderation, and yes, moderation isn’t exciting, but there is no need to put energy into something that isn’t a problem. The key is understanding if any of these things are standing in the way of your goals, and if they are, take care of them.
An easy way to test this is try to leave them for a week or even a month. If you feel bad while doing this it means addiction.
Antonio, I have watched your videos for years, and because of the shift in tone and focus I have finally subscribed to your channel. Keep going!
The gun range is absolutely the meditative thing for me and helps so much with my emotions. I also definitely avoid pain and suffering, gotta work on that too
I started with a simple at home workout using a app. I noticed the more disciplined I was with one routine,the more disciplined I was with more parts of my life.
I know I'm a little late to the party, but I figured I'd share a bit of my perspective here. For my emotions, I try to isolate myself in a quiet place, listen to some music that will help me understand what I am feeling and why I am feeling this way. And then as my release, I try to create something--painting, sculpting, carving, drawing. If not this, I go to the gym and work out until I collapse on the floor to get everything out.
In my mornings, I wake up and force myself into the shower, which I always end with about a minute of ice-cold water (I live in the mountains of Vermont, so I mean ice-cold). This one choice I make every morning not only gives me the clarity I need to make decisions throughout the day, but it also shows me a mindset of "just start the thing you hate, and you're halfway there."
for me, ive found that the first step to healthy self control is accepting yourself and your feelings. feeling things is ok, acting on them often isnt. learning to recognize those situations. ive gotten pretty good at allowing my emotions, like anger, to have their say, but halting myself at the point of action. if you try to not listen to your emotions just makes them more insistent as time goes on. for me its better to ride it out, think about what i want to do, and usually pretty quickly ill start thinking about the consequences of those actions, and next thing you know im calm. allow yourself time to think things thru before reacting. and know yourself, know how your going to react in any given situation , and learn to identify the more negative reactions you have. be honest with yourself, you dont do yourself any favors by trying to lie to yourself.
Great stuff to reflect upon....Especially that last point about putting people on a pedestal.
The last 3-4 minutes of this video is GOLD. I loved how you shared that us women are just human beings. I make a lot of mistakes. And I’m not at an A+ game everyday. Great advice to not put people on pedestals. I also loved how you shared your personal experiences and mistakes.
When I get angry, like mad angry, I tend to lie down, helps to cool down.
It is a teaching of the last Prophet (peace be upon him).
You hit the nail on the head with this Antonio. We must unlearn some of those things we have learned
Cold turkey, tasty on sandwiches.
When I got back from Hawaii end of October 2021 I went on a strict ketogenic diet and started off with a 5-day fast. I lost 80lbs in less than a year. I recently put some weight back on from a vacation, but I'm back to working it off.
Truly a beautiful video with the most genuine advice ❤
Mr. Centeno, dont know what years you were with 3/1 but I was with 2/1 in 2010 when we went to Afghan. Good ol Camp Horno and that black cloud eh lol?!?! I was a Corpsman actually and absolutely loved every minute with you devil dogs. Stay safe out there!
Great video and something everyone should be aware of.
Check your screen time, even if it is on 'useful' productivity things on your phone, and realize it is changing your behavior.
For me, mastering my emotions is multifactorial. Aside from the well known- lots of quality, sleep, good nutrition and supplements, very little alcohol, and exercise, it's also about knowing that all daily stressors (social, financial, physical, and mental) drain our ability to control our emotions. So with that understanding, knowing when to relax, and do activities that replenish you is key. This could be more sleep, watching a Netflix movie, exercise, walk in the park, yoga, prayer--- whatever it is, as long as YOU feel that you're "batteries" are being charged. Also, understand that decisions I make when I'm "drained" will result in bad decisions. I forgot what book I got this from because I read lots of personal development books.
This hit for me. Screen time BIGGG TIME for me. I watch wayyy too much RUclips and I’ve never been like this. I have to find a way to put my damn phone down and do the stuff I need to do. Also I’m a cold turkey guy.
I have all these vices. I know it, I try to get out but immediately fall back in.
This is why I bought a Wisephone - I don't have to fight the daily drip of addiction in my pocket. It changed my life.
The road to success, is paved in many failures.
I have been in a bad relationship with a girl for a long time and that has affected me a lot. I don't know how to get away from her and every time she talks to me I lose control of my emotions. Even though I want everything to go well, I just get desperate and don't know what to do. It could be called dependency, poor control of emotions, but every time I walk away I feel like I'm making a bad decision.
There are some good tools to help with the emotion thing. There is a hack for your limbic system that can help when you're getting angered or emotion is starting to take over.
Do a math problem in your head. It will turn on the rational part of your brain and immediately disconnect the angry monkey/primitive side. I do it quite often, especially in traffic.
@@jblackacre2325 Thanks man, I’ll give it a try
Great teachable moment Antonio! Appreciate the knowledge and insight.
For me, one of my main answers to dealing with emotions and to what hard things men should experience are the same. Now, my first answer to dealing with emotions is that I always look as hard as I can at why I feel that way, which sounds obvious, but when paired with opinions that you've formed over a lot of thought, you can much more easily dismiss certain emotions or know when you believe you should ignore them, and that's my answer for both questions: sometimes you have to simply endure, even when your emotions are going wild. Of course you should do this when you know you'll be able to control yourself, when it won't ultimately make the emotions worse, etc. but sometimes what you need to do when your emotions aren't obeying logic is to ignore them until they start to get better. Just let that mental pathway die so it can be replaced by a new one. This can also of course give you an opportunity to do something better than what you would've done if you let the emotion affect your behavior, whether that's getting something done or even if it's as simple as making conversation at a get-together while having a mild panic attack (that's probably the most extreme case where I've done this.) I think the most important thing is to have goals to motivate getting through an emotion, whether it's building relationships as best you can in the middle of a panic attack, treating someone with respect, love, or kindness even when you're angry or exhausted, or just getting something done no matter how you happen to feel, if it's important to you you'll be much more able to push through and improve not only your emotions, but your self-control.
Decency should be given and expected, respect is earned.
Damn Antonino. I agree there’s a rise in weak men in this world but disagree with these points. Thanks for the video! Love your content!
I'm a cold turkey guy, because I've found that if I try to make a gradual reduction, it's too easy to just slip back into it all the way.
My release is when I bowl. I have so much anxiety because of my Asperger's that it is hard for me to calm down. To bowl good, i must have a calm approach or I mess up my shots. As I bowl more, I get better and learn how to control my emotions. My highest average now in bowling is 217 and loving the ability to improve as I know I can. Now to just get my other five leagues up to that average as well.
Great video, this is exacly the problem keep Men weak, nothing to add.
I've always had a natural ability to stop things cold turkey or very little help. Stopped drinking smoking and a whole host of bad habits at an early age. The decision to do it is the most difficult part. Most if not all habits are mental. Wether you want to stop or start a new one. Most people don't have a clue what it takes to really change something. It's one thing and one day at a time. No worries. Take care ladies and gentlemen.
I go through cycles of downloading games, being addicted for weeks then cold turkey cutting them out, then a few months later it happens again. This happens with all my vices as well, how do other people break these cycles??
Love the honesty, makes me appreciate what you’re saying even more 💯
One mental, one physical.
Reading a specific book, X pages or chapters a day, ESPECIALLY when the reading gets boring or frustrating.
A morning 5K every other day, bonus pride if you do back to back days or extra loops.
I appreciate you sharing your struggles. It makes you more relatable. We all have struggles. :)
There’s nothing better than putting lead down range
It's excellent that Antionio is adding leg raises. We Want our clothes to fit and look their best. Most dudes do curls and bench but still have fat stomachs. Leg raises contribute to the V shape torso and a flat stomach. Adding ab related leg exercises besides just curling and pressing weights is crucial to the silhouette. Bicycle kicks, leg raises and crunches benifit in this way also
Antonio you are very good. I like your style first (you are very stylish and I like that). You saying great stuff. I've many videos of your stuff. You give me great guidance to fix me. Thank you very much.
😂 Thank you for this video and thank you for this channel Antonio. Man’ you said a lot of hilarious things is this one.
Need more on journaling. Guys are alexithymic so anything around feelings or taking mental stock has to be relearned.
Be disciplined, workout, and pursue your goal
Habit 5 is so true. Improving the approach to release stress is definitely a hallmark of becoming a man
I really like your new focus on self improvement advice.
I gave up gaming many years ago. Waste of time. And Violent video desensitize you to violence and that will make you ok with seeing violence and you won't care about it anymore. Your love for others starts diminishing because your so ok with being violent in video games. And some people do become violent. Out of the heart come your true desires.
I am definitely a cold turkey kind of man, as challenging and crazy that it may sounds i am. I want to just approach it and rid of it head on to get it over with. I am fortunate to have found this channel and catching up with a recent video such as this one, cause I’ve recently got rid of alcohol going on first week this Saturday, my older brother is a former Marine and I often get advice but him being a president of a corporation he’s very busy. I have learned how to breath, meditate and I’ve always worked out to keep my brain from a fog. I thank you for your content for I’m going in a new direction as far as career and i want to get back to the times when i really dressed for success, however my body transformation is becoming challenging as it’s changing rapidly.
Excellent video Brother
I think I understand the level headed till your not level headed thing. Many of us, myself included stay pretty level, the daily frustrations just get put in a box, then one day something or someone rips the box open. I usually go a decade between release events but I am sure this cannot be healthy, especially for the recipient. Better to address things calmly as they arise than end up with a box full of dynamite perhaps. Dynamite is so much more fun though I have to admit.
The gaming addiction is not only weakening but it can be expensive beyond belief. For instance, a good video card to put in your computer allowing for great game playing typically costs $400 or more. That money could be more wisely spent on something which allows you achieve more and become more accomplished. Worse yet, if all you put into yourself are video games, will you ever think of yourself as more than a master gamer? While that may be important in some circles, life in general couldn't care less about how many virtual enemies you kill.
About #6 - last year a former colleague of mine took me hiking twice to Vitosha Mountain(in Bulgaria) - the first time on the way back we went through the Stone river there which is basically a path made of rocks, which separated from the mountain. I almost s**t my pants going across them because on the one side there's literally a fall down the mountain and it's really uneven when going through. The second hike was 25 000+ steps on rough terrain, which took us around 4 hours with a lunch break in the middle. As I am not too active of a person it was really challenging for me, but oh man - throwing my phone away for a whole day and the utter physical exhaustion was terrific. Definitely recommend it to anybody, but if you are scared, that you might not be able to do that - try official trails through forests or around a mountain(we call them here "eco trails"), which don't have too steep parts. Wish you all a great and exciting new year!
My dear sir,
I have been watching your videos since pretty much the beginning and you’ve thought me a great deal about mens style and a few life hacks (d.e.c). I always thought that you had AAaLL together and that everything was just flowing for you. It now shows that we are much alike: I have been addicted to coke cola since 2010 and also have had anger issues. Those pretty much go hand in glove. Thank you so much for sharing this and also in your mental health video. It shows that no one is immune to the challenges of life.
What changed for me with the anger is that I got a new gf and job that didn’t know that side of me and I simply didn’t want to be that person anymore. Ask: is this really something to be angry about?