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is it true that no person in Ukraine would have been killed if their corrupt Ukrainian politicians would have allowed Russian President Putin to be the ruler of Ukraine ? The HOLY BIBLE says, "Pride goeth before destruction." ~ Proverbs 16:18
For those like me who learn / remember better with notes: 1. Life is not fair. Be prepared. 2. 52% of men will experience ED. 3. Focus on what you can control. 4. YOU are responsible for your life. 5. If you don't take charge of your life, others will. 6. You are going to DIE. 7. Fear holds us back. Don't let good be the enemy of great. 8. There are people you need to keep at an arm's length. 9. Even warriors ask for help. 10. Most people don't care about you. 11. Comparison is the death of happiness. 12. Changing your mind is not a weakness - it's the only true freedom you have. 13. No one can offend you without your permission. *Bonus. To be loved, you have to give love. The love you give is reflected back to you.
14. Be wary of charlatans selling self help books and ideology. Philosophers are not here to help you cope with life. They point out the hard truths and present to you the absurdity of it.
Everyone dies. Most everyone that you knew as a youngster; grandparents, aunt's, uncle's, neighbor's and their parents are all going to eventually die. The places that you went to visit them you will probably not enjoy again.
Success is not built on success. It's built on failure, It's built on fraustration. it's built on fear that you have to overcome. I pray that anyone who reads this will be successful in life
Lost my baby brother at 16, mother at 19 and father recently at 25. Losing my father was by far the worst because he was the one I could lean on. Now I'm the one my siblings look up to to lean on. At times I do feel sad but I always understood that death is part of life so instead of feeling like life sucks I'm just grateful for the time I had with my deceased loved ones. I focus on being a better person and only affecting what I'm able to change. I can't change the cycle of life so I won't waste time dwelling on what ifs.
Thanks for sharing Marine. My father died when I was 11 years old. I’m 54 now, and a “retired” U.S. Marine with a beautiful family. He never saw any of it. Never saw me graduate from high school, college, Officer Candidates School, going off to war…he was a disciplined man, who engrained a sense of right and wrong in me as a child. Who modeled personal responsibility. I’m gritty/resilient because of him. Life has knocked me down many many times. I always recover quickly. I find a way to move forward. I focus on my ultimate goal. To go to Heaven. Forward!
When my wife passed last Dec. I was ready to hang it up but then I remembered not only do we have daughters that need me but that woman fought all the way till her final heart beat even on life support she was fighting to live, I owe it to them and also to myself to be a better man and honor her, Don't want better but do better to get better. Thank you for your channel sir it's truly helping me improve myself.
Lost my mom at 18, my father at 21. I wish I had told them I loved them more often. Lesson learned, never forget to tell people how important they are, because someday, it will be to late.
My family is pushing me to follow my brothers footsteps career wise, and stop going to college. Everyone tells me college is a scam etc, and I get where they are coming from, but I am damn good at it. I just wrapped up my second year and one of my professors told me I had the highest quality of work that he’s ever seen at this school, and that my work would be happily accepted in a masters level program. To follow the career path of my brother when I have another path available to me, unique to my talents, feels like something I would regret not seeing through.
Of course you will be accepted in the masters program, the professor wants to fill up the empty classroom seats with paying customers. Your quality work in the classroom is meaningless out side of the college campus.
what major? i dont wanna be negative, but if your field requires you to have masters, its just college milking you for additional money. dont fall into trap. get your 4 years degree and get a job. dont stay in academia and collect 10 degrees.
Stick with it. College is the best thing you can do for yourself. I can’t even believe somebody would call it a scam, as long as it’s a real ABET accredited university.
I am 32 years old. I've been a nurse since I was 24. I was in a toxic relationship that turned into marriage. I was abused physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. I am not a victim. All of this took a long time to see. Now, my children are mostly with me and I have the best job I've ever had. I am HAPPY at work and even my worst day is better than my best. I haven't been innocent either, but I know my sins can be forgiven. I have repented and my life finally makes sense.
I'm 31 and far from the best position in life, I contemplate suicide often so I needed to hear this, life is FAR from fair or easy for anyone but we have to work through it and try to cope with potential issues ahead of time. Life is not fair but God is good. Thank you Antonio! All the best from the U.K, Sean
Thanks for sharing your story. I agree - life is never fair but we have to learn to deal with the hurdles and obstacles to be better. Wishing you the best in 2022.
I've had similar thoughts,though I just curse it n get busy,all I can say is finding stuff that I like,n sarounding ur urself with people or things that u like, does help
90's childhood in Eastern Europe( only Eastern Europeans will understand this) from 22 to 32 years I spent 10 years on the run helping my brother to escape jail( no job, no careeer) from which 2 years sleeping on the streets, while we were hiding my brother got cancer, and using my identity he underwent surgery. 4 years of peace, I go to uni, I take my degree, and take my first job at 33 years(!!!) 16 months before his jail sentence would have been canceled( prescription), he dies in a car crash. I'm 37 now, changing careers, drinking a little bit too much, and overweight, but as always, moving forward. My grandpa Survived Stalingrad, Ukrainians are surviving a war, and I will survive a basic drama.
I work as a nurse in an ICU. I have been at the bedside numerous times alongside people saying goodbye to their loved ones. I've held the hands of countless dying people. I've coached so many people through these tough situations. Everything you said really resonates and in my experience rings true. Saying goodbye is hard. A lot of difficult emotions come out based on a person's history. People grieve in different ways. Some people handle things in a really healthy way. Others... Not so much. I believe people often don't realize why they act the way they do - maybe because they feel guilty for how they've spent the last few years. The family member from another state shows up and wants EVERYTHING done, while the other family member who has been there working as the caregiver for the last few years has a much more comprehensive view of how they've reached the point of where we accept the end of life. Things can get really ugly. Truthfully, the best shifts of my career are most often the ones where I help someone die comfortably and with dignity. Ideally I help the family through this process in a meaningful way, if they're ready to accept the reality of the situation. It's a fine line between encouraging people to ignore everything else and be present with their family member in the final days and hours - while also letting them know it's okay and healthy to go home, do their laundry, make some food, etc. To control the things they can. We'll do our best to keep them in the loop so they're there when the time comes. And even if they're not there at the very end, I always like to let them know someone - often that person is myself - was there holding a hand and speaking kind words so no one dies alone in a hospital bed. Believe me and most any other nurse whose been around the block when we tell you there are many things worse than death and all too often we go far beyond what I think is right and ethical in a futile attempt to prolong the inevitable. Lots of what I do hurts, and often we torture people when I wish we could instead make them comfortable so they can finally be called home. I'm glad you spoke so passionately about being open with the ones you love and telling them how you feel. Things can change in an instant, and I've never heard anyone say they wish they worked more. This was a fantastic video with tons of real, honest, and important information. Thanks for making it.
I feel your compassion & thank you for your perspective. It was hard to lose a loved one & yet still be there for yourself & others. I had to remind myself to not drop everything, because life continues & we need to keep living. So while spending time being with my loved one during their last days, I found moments to spare where I ate a great bbq with a church men's fellowship, attended as a groomsman at a close friend's wedding, looked after other loved ones, and took walks during sunset. Yet through it all I still managed to be there at my loved one's bedside in their last moments, with both our digities intact. It was hard to shake off a feeling of guilt, even though I wasn't guilty of anything; I had to remind myself that, there's no reason to feel guilty for doing some things for ourselves, esp. when we need it. You have to keep living; And your loved ones are glad you did.
You brought up some great points. Mom was an alcoholic and when I was about 25 yrs old I had had enough told her to stay away from my family. Well the Narcissist came out and she called people, parents of my friends, and told them I don't know what. 35 years later, my "friends" who I've known since I was 5 still don't connect with me, even after reaching out several times. I spent the majority of my life making sure my wife was happy. Divorced anyway. 1 nervous breakdown later and 5 years wanted to date. That went terribly wrong. Tried again in 07. Right after Christmas got kicked to the curb. Haven't dated since. I feel a need for companionship but nothing else. My 1 son who survived is Autistic and about 10 yrs ago started having seizures. Now it's hang around the house do my work and wait for the next one. So yes Life is not fair. I can keep going but probably commented too much already
I wish I had seen this when you lost your friends. I would have told you to sue your mother for slander. Did you call your friends and tell them not to listen to your mother and why?
I was sheltered as a child by my mom, and abused by my stepfather. Fear is everywhere. Women, social interactions, workplace hierarchy. My self worth has been at low levels all my life. Now I'm 35 and reprogramming myself. Went to tech school. Graduated, while working full time. Stopped dating. Started focusing more on music, even picked up the drums. And lately.... I've wanted to work out or run more. I have let life tear me down in fear. I'm just making lists now, and checking off items just as quick.
I sincerely appreciate your honesty. I'm in my late thirties, and it has been an extremely hard time in my life. And hearing people like you helps a lot. Thanks.
In watching this channel for over 6 years, this is one of the best videos that I've seen on here. The guidance that is provided is useful to any man. It does not matter how old you are. It was a great reminder for me to keep the focus on myself and improve for the benefit of myself. I also find the Serenity Prayer great as well. I say it every day and apply it to situations as needed. There is always more than one narrative on how a story can be made!
Lost a brother to suicide a long time ago so I feel your pain on that one and spent years trying to think of what I could have done. Trust me it will get better over time. I'm 63 now and in a great position in life and just trying to get my mind around retiring. Financially it's not an issue. I work with a great team and I don't really want to lose the engagement and intellectual challenge of solving problems. My fear in life is ending up in one of those early morning senior coffee mens gossip groups you see in every McDonalds in the morning. Yikes!
Yes, you recognized that pitfall of ending up in a "senior coffee mens gossip groups" I avoided this as well in the form of a wings night, it can come in different forms but a group with a negative vibe should be avoided for many reasons
Man i feel you. 2008 was my year. Lost a unicorn IT job because my mom died from cancer, then 2 weeks after she died my dad told me he also had cancer but waited to tell me because of my mom. Lost him 2 months later. Spiraled into a depression I never felt before. Snorted Oxycontin for 2 years after that before I got my shit together.
Thanks, Antonio! Great video and advice for us who just turned 30! I have stage 4 lung cancer, but I am not giving up my future! Even if I fear rejection, I will not let go of the life that is meant for me!
I needed this video today; life spares us nothing. Yesterday I found out a good friend of mine commited suicide the night before. I'm still in shock, but I know I can deal with it over time and process it properly.
Story time: At the end of my 20s I developed epilepsy. Did not know until it knocked me down after a 600lbs deadlift and my friends watched. Partial seizures. A blackout but you keep doing stuff not knowing you do them. Like sleepwalking. You come back confused and memory loss. From 5sec to 10mins. Got one on the motorcycle too when I did not know but suspected smth is wrong. I dragged the damn poor thing home and cried for a bit. Still continued my business despite getting seizures in Irland and just waking up in the middle of nowhere. I had to quit everything. Got 7 a day. Sports, arguing, sex, talking, the wrong breath induced one. Fought a whole year to get rid of them, gf broke up. And I did manage to get rid of the seizures, but mum got cancer. She died on new years eve after taking care of her. Once I could get up again from the loss, I bought a motorcycle and took a ride out. Bang, car blindsides me and puts me in the hospital where I just watched mum pass away. Bastards were well insured cab company owners. Said I drove into them the police report stated. I convinced them otherwise. I recovered, forgot those assholes and covid hit the stage putting my business through the wringer. I never grew so much as in the last 3 years. I am still in, still riding, still working. Everyone said I should take it easy, no riding, no risk, to take the safe path. I challenged my neurological state at a hard enduro event. I was breathing to exhaustion and got no seizures. My leg was giving in a bit due to the damn car taking me down. At the event I crashed, overturned the bike downhill and had quite a few bruises and cuts BUT rode back home with a smile and a small tear. I am alive. I am living. We can keep going. I had many late night ride outs asking the dear lord for insight, but nobody answered. Sometimes I even fancied the thought that a 45cal would be quite a cozy way out if things turn really bad. But why? I will die anyways. Until then let's kick the devil's teeth in. I wish you all grit and strenght. And just be good. Cheers. And thank you for the video!
1. You've lived to tell the tale. That speaks volumes about your resilience. 2. Build social capital. If friends and family are not available, you could join a group composed of people going through similar challenges. For example a church or AA for people suffering from alcoholism. 3. Similar to no 2 above, you can consider blogging.
Dude, as a biker I am so proud of you. So many people give up after a little slip. Your story males me want to kick the devil's teeth in. Thank you for posting your story. I have some shit to deal with lately so thank you for the boost.
What’s holding me back? Childhood trauma, neglect and abuse, mostly. I know I’m responsible for my own life and how those things effect me but, yeah. That’s a pretty rough one.
I feel you 100% growing up confiding in people you can’t really trust or count on has fucked me mentally. I’m learning that being in control of my own future is the only remedy. I’m self employed and at times it’s way more stressful than a regular 9-5 but the freedom from phony people is priceless. Build your future bro you got this!
@@searchforthetruth1998 Thank you for the kind words, I truly appreciate it. Unfortunately this video didn’t really make me feel very empowered today. My therapist often asks where I see myself in ten years and I’ve never been able to give him an answer other than I don’t. It’s just all black square and nothingness. I hope you go far, brother. I wish you all the best.
Just remember the cardinal rule. “Life is gonna kick you in the balls, then it’s gonna come back and kick you in the face.” If you have balls and or a face, watch out.
Wow, the authenticity and vulnerability you show is admirable! Thanks for this video Antonio. I took away that I need to be responsible in ALL areas of my life. Not just the convenient ones. Keep taking risks with your channel. I think this type of content will resonate with men and is what we need to positively impact the world!
I always remember the first sentence that appears on Daidoji Yuzan's "Way of the Samurai": The Samurai must remember that one day he has to die. And that's the important thing, knowing that you have to die, you won't fear death. Great video Antonio.
11:30 The biggest thing holding me back is actually just sheer ignorance of what else I could be doing with my time. I have so little experience in many things in life, that sometimes it literally doesn't even occur to me to do a new way of doing things.
The truth about "taking charge of your own life" (5) was such a hard pill to swallow until the reality of truth 6 started feeling closer in the mid 30s. When suddenly everything is on a clock, it changes your perspective on *everything*.
My fear is going back to college and wanting to study finance or something similar.. I’ve been in construction for 7 years currently 30 yrs old and my mind is telling me “just keep it simple” “you make good money” I’m definitely in the comfort zone. I don’t have debt and thats another thing I’m afraid of “what if I spend all this money& time and not be satisfied” i too read philosophy, neuroscience , psychology, and many books..im interested in so many things but society says you need to select ONE career and be happy.
Fuck society. I been broke my whole life. Living month to month. From being 25 years old athlete I become seriously ill because of autoimmune disease, to this day I live in pain. This happened just a few months after I lost my best friend. Then I worked in poor paying slave jobs. I tried to make my dreams come true (art) but failed. Then I get back to what I love when I was very young - programming. I found a job two years later. Now I am working in a fantastic company, with great people finally saving money every month effortlessly. Just be persistent my Bros - life is hard - but we will get there 💪
I don't normally venture in the the comment section, but this video deserves a response. Thank you!!! I have been watching you for a while and this is the best video I have watched. Very timely for the times we are living. Your honesty and vulnerability makes you more trustworthy. Love and prayers to your family and Slava Ukraini
I never had a dad growing up and was abused when I was young. Your bonus tip hit hard to me- on how to give love to everyone around you. You might not see my comment but I'm grateful to see your video every day.
First of all I am so sorry for your loss, I cannot even imagine how that would feel like. I just want to thank you for making content like this, alongside your other videos about fashion which made me subscribe intially. It's conversations like these I've never had the opporunity to have in the past, and I am so glad the younger generation gets to through RUclips, especially if they dont have a good parental figure or guidance otherwise. These talks are invaluable regardless of gender. You're doing good work, stay real and true!
One thing that helped me was changing my word usage. We all tend to say that we HAVE to or we NEED to do something. If you just replace words like have and need to the word choose then you understand nothing is a have or a need. It's a choice you make based off favorable consequences. Once people understand this, other things like stoicism kinda fall into place.
My fear is directly tied to the amount of rejection I've received in my life. There was a time I was ask out any woman, apply for any job. I was nervous and scared, but faced it with courage. Courage cannot exist without fear. Now, at 40, I've been rejected on an epic level and the fear of more rejection has made me stop dead in my tracks. I can't take any more. Now I live a life of poverty, soul crushing loneliness, involuntary celibacy and much more. I hate waking up to this life every day.
I have no desire for marriage, and comparing it to my life during boyhood when I wanted it, life is much better. I don't want to have the desire for a wife. Rather than preoccupying on a woman, seek God: “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33, KJV) “Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” (Revelation of John 3:20, KJV)
I'm really sorry to read what you've been through, I don't have the answer for what you need and I don't know you, but I'm sure you're a wonderfull human being and I wish you for the best. Please, don't give up.
Sorry to hear about that. I think that outcome is much more common nowadays than you think. That being said, I'd like to echo what Rudy T said above. Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousnous. You might be surprised what happens to your life as a result. God bless.
Lost & Found for Our Lord Jesus Christ ❣️🙏 Do not be afraid says the Lord your God.. My Heavenly Father has great plans for you..! Don't give up.. come back to him & to the Sacraments because the Devil is real & he wants to put you down.. Go to the Traditional Mass or Tridentine Our Lord Jesus is with us in the Bless Sacrament the Holy Communion.. He has promised to be with us Until the end of the world 🌎 million of people are lost but Our Lord Jesus Christ is with us He is my best friend I talked to him every day 🌞 Our Lady of Fatima in Portugal talked about this we're in the Last Battle for the Family and Marriage..! For that we are seeing all this Ideologies that wants to destroy God's Creation.. She is going to be the Noak Ark for this times.. but she promised at "The End My Immaculate Heart will Triumph" ❤ That's my Mother a Warrior for his children.. We need Our Man Strong enough to fight back Read the book from Saint Louis the Monfort to know your Heavenly Mother the Mother of Jesus Christ ❣️ Read the prophecy of Rome 1975 by Ralph Martin My God is preparing a powerful Army for this times.. Check Catholic Match Our Patron Saint is Saint Rafael for people who wants to marry in the future God bless you & Never Ever give up we need Strong Men's in this difficult times but you need to put the Whole Armor of God 🙏
This year has been really tough for me aswell, Im starting in my late 30's with a life Im unhappy with and feeling depressed. Then I got Covid 2nd time end of June( and this time its been long covid) and then 6 weeks ago got Eustachian Tube Dysfunction which caused middle Ear Infection. This then caused me Tinnitus for first time in my life and its been horrible and stressful last few weeks. Anybody that has suffered will undersand the fear and anxiety this condition can cause with no medical cure! Then my family boiler broke after 15 years and that meant I had too pay for the boiler upfront! This while being on Sick Pay and looking for new career change next year and 3 month intensive course next February! So its been tough and stressful last 6 months! Its defintely made me re-assess my life and the importance of my happiness, love, friendship and self growth! The wonderful self development " Little Things Matter" by Todd W Smith has some great lessons for people wanting to change themselves and stop making the same errors in life! Great advice for us Gentlemen! Cheers Antonio from UK!
These are applicable at any age from 14 onwards. But what changes for a lot of 30+ men is now they have people looking to them for direction (wether children or employees or younger colleagues or just the younger generation starting their adult lives in general). Wether you want it or not, chances are you will be a mentor (dare I say leader) to some people at some point in some place (if you aren't already). So own your actions, keep yourself together mentally physically etc. be the best version of yourself because you are not an island. You influence other people's lives wether you want to or not.
The thing about comparisons, the principle I try to follow is that I don't have to be better than anyone, except my previous self. If you want to make the world a better place, start with the person in the mirror.
I've been seeing you videos since my earlier 20s and subscribed to your channel in my mid 20s. I'm now in my early 30s and your videos always make me think and evaluate myself, to move from a young idealist to a mature realist. And fortunately, this video really hits me in the right moment. If God permits, would love to meet you someday and personally thank you for your videos that have brought me to where I am now.
I'm sorry about your sister and brother in law. Well said. Completely agree. One foot in front of the other and move forward through life whatever happens. Life can beat you or you can beat life. Prepare as much as is practical but whatever happens, have resilience. I've had so many things happen over my 53 year lifetime, from serious illnesses to losing family, and kept walking forward that I'm starting to think I'm Captain Scarlet. Take control and set a direction. Love the jacket.
My mom passed after a 10 yr battle with altzhiemers. 15 months later my dad passed suddenly. I went through both extremes to see a parent linger so long and not being able to do anything, then one day talking and visiting with my dad to finding him unresponsive. Either way, I learned your never prepared.
Really needed to hear all of these, Antonio. You're like the big brother I never had. Yep, I'm really struggling still. Last time I commented I think was in the lessons you learned from the marines vid. Was struggling then, too, lol. Gonna keep the faith, gonna find a way. A step at a time. Just wanna say thanks for these kinds of vids, you're really helping someone out.
I’m 37, not happy where I am at. Dad left my mom, sister and I when we were 19. But left everything in the red, rent was past due by six months, utilities were about be cut off. My sister and I handled it but it hasn’t been easy. Now I wish to move out but I don’t know how. I feel like I am stuck. We (sister and I) are taking care of two elderly family members, who did nothing to prepare for tomorrow. We’re constantly worried about our future, to which our elderly family doesn’t care since they’re so close to death anyway. I am so at a lost I don’t know what to do.
Take strength from your sister mate. At least you have a companion and partner through your bad circumstances. Invest in her and love her because she is the only person that’s as invested as you are! Life is most rewarding when there is love and at least you have that.
I appreciate the new direction you’re taking with the channel! It’s nice to know we’re all human and that we all have a story to share. Learned a lot about fashion from you in the past and stepped up my wardrobe. Looking forward to hearing you share more about being a well rounded man! Keep it up my friend, you matter!
I was doing good in my early thirties. In the best shape of my life, had a partner and a great job making good money. Had a panic attack at the gym and developed a panic disorder....lost everything. But it's made me realize I had a lot of inside work to do 5 years later still struggling but doing better now.
As a drug and alcohol counselor, I am constantly reminding my clients that they can only control their actions and reactions. If your peace of mind, success, ability to live a happy, fulfilled life is dependent on the actions of others, you are doomed to failure. Phenomenal video!!! And I’m glad to hear you’re a Star Wars/Star Trek fan!!! Wife and I are huge fans as well!!!
Good words. But new star wars are decedent trash “super hero” movies. They’re the cultural equivalent of being a grown man dressing like a teenager. Star Wars is space opera not sci-fi.
It's pretty sad that both Star Wars and Star Trek are being destroyed by corrupt corporations that want an excuse to push for their radically insane agendas.
“It doesn’t mater if you’re a 45-year old man, or if you are a 15-year old young man.” I haven’t heard such great respectful thing to younger generation in a while! :)
Truth to all word in this video. I learned almost all points through trial and error. I am glad that there is someone using their platform to share their knowledge of life with the masses. Thank you for this and may you always have much success.
I had no idea about your sister, Antonio. That's gut wrenching. So happy to see how successful you've become and have truly appreciated all your content these last several years.
Tony, thank you for this video. As a guy who grew up fatherless, I really appreciate these kind of life lesson videos. Grateful for what people like you set out in life to do.
Western civilization is in desperate need of tons of tough love. We've been conditioned to think that we are owed everything and we don't hold any responsibilities whatsoever. Guess what? We are all in for a reckoning, very soon. Thanks for your video, Antonio. I appreciate you getting more into these topics. 👍
About a month ago, i was going through some things. I had to have an honest conversation with myself. My life is pretty good, but sometimes when things get squirly i had some self destructive behavior, one being compulsive eating. I always felt that i can fix it myself, but i came to realize that i needed to get help and i did. Three weeks working on my recovery. It has also gotten me more focused on finding faith, because i finally realize that i need a higher power to help guide me. I can't do it alone and thats a tough pill to swallow for me.
Antonio, thank you for this video - it pierced me through the heart in the way I appreciate it. As a copywriter, please make these life videos as I find them humanizing your brand. I love it when I see a man embody being comprehensive in being authentic while providing value with their niche. I've been watching your channel since 2013 or 2014 when I was 15 years old - you're the virtual father figure I admire alongside Jason Wilson and Kobe Bryant. This year was 1 year of building my copywriting business, then life kicked me in the balls with steel toe boots. Ouch! 😭 I broke up with two mentors (one of them helped me get out of living the THUG life in my youth) and felt lost of what I was going to do with my life. Then those emotions put me in a spiraled out depression where I wasn't doing my best in my business... These days, I'm very proud I went through that experience as it helped me grow in different levels. I wouldn't have my new men's style, the entrepreneurial men's community I'm in, and a deeper relationship with my copywriting coaches. ❤🔥 Thank you for being the lighthouse in my life and business brother - cheering you on the other side. P.S I had a blast at your Thanksgiving stream - do more like them as I've learned so much from them. 😊
In a society where it is increasingly commont to see a growing sense entitlement and whining to have the rest of the world adapt rather than working to improve, this kind of hard reality-check talk is much needed content.
I like how men are more sincere when it comes to advice. If you see most women giving advice is always blaming someone and victimizing women. You are really honest and actually want to help others.
I hope any other women listening take these to heart too. It applies not to just men but to women too! Love your channel and thank you for your videos! ❤
I've been friends with people that utter the words"things aren't fair" and they've sat and are sitting on their hands and not doing anything about it, Antonio sorry for your family's loss
Love this video. I make it an effort to live by these values, and often I can forget or steer away from them. Videos like these really help remind me of the truths about life and knowing there are others that understand and give some sort of, for lack of a better word, guidance as to getting back on track. Thank you !
Excellent talk. Thank you for sharing. I can definitely relate to the mortality topic. The older I get the more important my use of time becomes or at least my realization that things need to be prioritized.
Just watched this straight after the "Does your clothing disgust women react" video. And what's amazing, is the start of that video you have a plain white background, no intro on yourself, and yet point out that she does these things perfectly (good background, quick intro, tells you who she is incase your a new watcher). And then in less than a year after that video, you've got ones like this where (whether you took the lessons from that or not) you've implemented each and every one of those improvements. Really exemplifies that taking responsibility/constant improvement mindset, and it's motivational to me - makes me want to take steps, to get better, and do similar things to my work in my life. Nice one!
Thank you so much Antonio for sharing. Great point. Everyone is responsible for his/her own life no matter what, we just have to accept what we cannot change, and change what we can.
Your words must be inspiring for many. Yes, we should take our life in our hand, otherwise someone will do it for us. Here is my life story how I discovered meaning of being yourself. When I was 10 my dad used to drive me to a music school which was about 8 km far from our house in the city, we lived in a village close to the city. Once he took me to his work place, which was en-route to the music school , and asked one of his co-workers (well, one of his assistants) to drive me to the music school. So, we came out of my dad's office and entered to that co-worker's office room, where four or five people were sitting on their desks. I remember, then I proudly compared by myself my dad's office with 20-person meeting long table and his gorgeous armed chair with this bunch of people who were crowded in a small office. Suddenly, someone from inside my head interrupted my proud thoughts about my dad's office and asked me: "Well, boy. Are you sure you can better than these people, have a separate large working office with leather armchairs and command others when you become at these people age?!" That voice was so strong, I felt like I was dumped a bucket of ice water. I am sure that was a moment I got the meaning of being yourself. That was, I guess, my inner voice who always comes to my help when I need it. Now, I am writing these strokes from a warm office, sitting in a leather chair alone in a room with a meeting table, TV set, and sofas for receiving guests and thanking that voice who awakened my mind so early.
"To be or not to be" There is no security in life or any comfort zone.Keep being alive and creative is one of the main solution.All the Best to everyone.Salutations from France
My fear of opening up again is holding me back. I’m 26 and have had 2 girlfriends. Both left me cuz i was too clingy, which I luckily realized instead of blaming all women. But instead of trying to not be that way i feel like I’m giving up actually. It was already so hard for me to meet girls and now i feel even worse knowing that the ones i get with don’t even want me. The worst part is now that I’ve stopped trying i get more attention from girls, but i know how i am now and i know they’ll eventually dislike me if it did end up going somewhere. Most of my guy friends have had many girlfriends and my dad was a ladykiller but I’ve been the only one to never really figure it out and the older i get the more I think about my track record and compare it to them and I’m starting to realize maybe they just never were my thing and i should just stop.
Dude, that's BS. Don't let those thoughts conquer your mind. Nothing worthwile is easy. When I fail at something or afraid of something I remind myself that there is a better life behind that fear and there won't be any success without failures. So don't be afraid of trying and failing, It's ok to fail, but it's not ok to let those fails stop you. You got this, man
Bro! At 26 you are just about to be at the stage in life where the power dynamic between men and women inverts. It’s hard to be 18-26 year old man to find love, gets a lot easier after 28 or so. Just be patient brother, they will soon be wanting you and making you feel worthy! Being “clingy” is the same as being invested, and if you have the strength to keep trying you will find a girl as invested as you, I promise.
"While I was still searching but not finding - I found one upright man among a thousand, but not one upright woman among them all." - Ecclesiastes 7:28
I had an instance where I didn't make a rep team despite me feeling like I trialed well and better than some kids who did make teams. It was hard to accept but my dad and I kept practising and I ended up getting called up to a team to play for. I guess it was a good lesson of resilience and persistence
just went through the roughest part of my life for the past three years. Just got my first real life changing news yesterday. nothing is going to stop me now.
I love your vids, 31 I'm all good, changed my life after reading 12 rules for life by Peterson. Bought a cleaning business and shit are just better when you embrace the responsability for your life. But I'm very lucky so I stay humble because I know how stupid I can be.
Antonio when you hit the topic of "brutal truths men need to hear" I was like wow you where talking to me like a father! Well spoken when you said "you have made a number of choices that led you down a certain path" its true because of me not taken care of myself I landed in dialysis i have FSG it sucks but now I have to face my consequences Your like a friend here to all man who wants to improve their lives
Hey Antonio, You really inspired and motivated today brother . Marine-to-Marine here. (O311). I just got kicked in the balls myself and I'm licking my wounds like a wounded dog , and trying to figure out what my next course of action will be. Thank you!!! Semper Fi
Rule #7: I am 37 and still have overwhelming fear of rejection in such an extent that it makes me impossible to approach women (if there is no sign or gesture from their side). I had many encounters, when a little bit of boldness from my side (verbally in form of compliments, or in form of gestures like taking hands) could have opened a door for a romantic encounter. Busted. Many. Painfully regretting them. After a while started to use "cheatcode": sugardating and it worked out very well. Basically, all my experience and little self-esteem comes from such encounters - until I undermined my financial foundations. Next thing I am thinking about is some sort of medical help in forms of anti-stress pills so that I can kill off the paralyzing fear. The basic advice: "just go for it" is useless. The fear is so strong I cannot hide it, and it overtakes me so much that it makes me objectively undesired, unwanted, unattractive. Any other field, eg work or in friendships, I have no issue whatsoever, on the contrary...
I understand what your going through. The way I overcome the initial awkward fear of approaching a woman first is to breathe then remind yourself if you can go sell those accounts and talk to REAL sharks at work then talking to a woman who could potentially make your life better is worth the risk. You got this bro!
😊 Hello you don't need to be scared of us..! Just relax & be yourself and learn what Antonio is teaching you.. women like man with manners and polite.. You can meet maybe your future wife at Catholic Match & pray to Saint Rafael he's the Patron Saint for the Catholic Church 🙏
I've accepted that life isn't fair, that you need to work hard and be persistent. But lately I've lost every motivation to live. I'm 30, never had a girlfriend, never been close to having one. I don't see a point in living life alone without a family. I'm very asocial, I don't know how to act with people so I don't see a way out of this situation. Hard work isn't bad, but it's bad when you have no idea how to do that work.
Learning how to act with people is similar to learning everything else. You find someone who can teach you (even if it's just the "Charisma on Command" RUclips channel), and then you put in the effort and practice what you've learned. Just from my experience, I didn't get good at chatting with attractive women until I became good at conversing with people in general. Attractive women are people too, so the same skillset applies. However, this means that you can practice being social with everyone you meet. Last week I attended a professional party where I knew 2 people, and I wasn't going to spend the party monopolizing their time. I was trying to network with people I *didn't* know. So I followed a piece of advice that I learned from a marketer at my company: I looked for the people who didn't have anyone to talk to (at least at that moment), then struck up a conversation.
So refreshing to hear life advice from a self-made guy. There are too many "psychologists" who blame your parents or a bully at school for your current state 20 years later :)
As in you'd take the opinion of someone who tells you "Hey, I've never seen the alleged curvature of the Earth" over someone who has measured the planet with a host of different methods and has had their conclusions validated by others in the field.
@@ohauss You ironically proved the opposite of the point you were trying to make. You can't see the curvature of the planet with the naked eye, so the person saying they can't see it is technically being truthful. Someone who's honest enough to admit that is grounded in their own consciousness and direct experience of life, whereas the scientist has to take a dry, detached, lifeless approach to the question and probably would have a borderline autistic/robotic way of looking at the world that wouldn't be helpful or relatable. The first person is talking about their direct experience whereas the scientist is substituting their direct experience for a model based on a mathematical abstraction; in other words one deals with actual reality and one deals with mental abstractions that merely describe a model of reality. Which is exactly why the scientist isn't going to be able to give the best life advice, because they're stuck in their own heads and confuse their mental abstractions and mathematical models for reality itself.
You're so charismatic and well spoken. I really enjoy watching your videos even when some of them don't necessarily pertain to me. You're a pleasure to listen to.
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What brutal truths do men need to hear now? Comment below!
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Sorry about your sister. When I was too young to remember I had a brother who was stabbed but I remember the impact it had on my family.
Damn.... you do alot for family
is it true that no person in Ukraine would have been killed if their corrupt Ukrainian politicians would have allowed Russian President Putin to be the ruler of Ukraine ?
The HOLY BIBLE says, "Pride goeth before destruction." ~ Proverbs 16:18
For those like me who learn / remember better with notes:
1. Life is not fair. Be prepared.
2. 52% of men will experience ED.
3. Focus on what you can control.
4. YOU are responsible for your life.
5. If you don't take charge of your life, others will.
6. You are going to DIE.
7. Fear holds us back. Don't let good be the enemy of great.
8. There are people you need to keep at an arm's length.
9. Even warriors ask for help.
10. Most people don't care about you.
11. Comparison is the death of happiness.
12. Changing your mind is not a weakness - it's the only true freedom you have.
13. No one can offend you without your permission.
*Bonus. To be loved, you have to give love. The love you give is reflected back to you.
Pure gold
14. Be wary of charlatans selling self help books and ideology. Philosophers are not here to help you cope with life. They point out the hard truths and present to you the absurdity of it.
Everyone dies. Most everyone that you knew as a youngster; grandparents, aunt's, uncle's, neighbor's and their parents are all going to eventually die. The places that you went to visit them you will probably not enjoy again.
About 6,it's worth mentioning that people around you will die too
@@williamkazak469 Sounds like you have a rather "unhappy" outlook towards Death.
The Beauty of Life is Death!
Success is not built on success. It's built on failure, It's built on fraustration. it's built on fear that you have to overcome. I pray that anyone who reads this will be successful in life
It's not about watching videos and wasting your time and strategy
Victoria Alejandro has really made name for herself
I'm not here to converse for her but to testify just for what I'm sure of
A friend that I referred to her just received €61,050 profit after 6days of investing..... I became jealous.. Lol.
My first experience with her gave me the assurance that has made me to invest without fear of loosing.
Lost my baby brother at 16, mother at 19 and father recently at 25. Losing my father was by far the worst because he was the one I could lean on. Now I'm the one my siblings look up to to lean on. At times I do feel sad but I always understood that death is part of life so instead of feeling like life sucks I'm just grateful for the time I had with my deceased loved ones. I focus on being a better person and only affecting what I'm able to change. I can't change the cycle of life so I won't waste time dwelling on what ifs.
Thanks for sharing - wishing you strength and good fortune.
my strentgh is with u brother
You will be on my mind forever Angel. You taught me something today and I appreciate it.
@@RealMenRealStyle Thank you! I appreciate the kind words.
@@irtezanidalkhan76 thank you! It takes strenght to get up some days. But knowing I have a promise to keep gives me strength 💪.
This is probably the single most important few minutes EVERYONE can spend and take as the best advice you'll ever get.
Thanks for sharing Marine. My father died when I was 11 years old. I’m 54 now, and a “retired” U.S. Marine with a beautiful family. He never saw any of it. Never saw me graduate from high school, college, Officer Candidates School, going off to war…he was a disciplined man, who engrained a sense of right and wrong in me as a child. Who modeled personal responsibility. I’m gritty/resilient because of him. Life has knocked me down many many times. I always recover quickly. I find a way to move forward. I focus on my ultimate goal. To go to Heaven. Forward!
When my wife passed last Dec. I was ready to hang it up but then I remembered not only do we have daughters that need me but that woman fought all the way till her final heart beat even on life support she was fighting to live, I owe it to them and also to myself to be a better man and honor her, Don't want better but do better to get better. Thank you for your channel sir it's truly helping me improve myself.
Lost my mom at 18, my father at 21. I wish I had told them I loved them more often. Lesson learned, never forget to tell people how important they are, because someday, it will be to late.
My family is pushing me to follow my brothers footsteps career wise, and stop going to college. Everyone tells me college is a scam etc, and I get where they are coming from, but I am damn good at it. I just wrapped up my second year and one of my professors told me I had the highest quality of work that he’s ever seen at this school, and that my work would be happily accepted in a masters level program. To follow the career path of my brother when I have another path available to me, unique to my talents, feels like something I would regret not seeing through.
Of course you will be accepted in the masters program, the professor wants to fill up the empty classroom seats with paying customers. Your quality work in the classroom is meaningless out side of the college campus.
what major? i dont wanna be negative, but if your field requires you to have masters, its just college milking you for additional money. dont fall into trap. get your 4 years degree and get a job. dont stay in academia and collect 10 degrees.
College is not bad by itself, but actual colleges want students to succeed in the real world.
Stick with it. College is the best thing you can do for yourself. I can’t even believe somebody would call it a scam, as long as it’s a real ABET accredited university.
I am 32 years old. I've been a nurse since I was 24. I was in a toxic relationship that turned into marriage. I was abused physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. I am not a victim. All of this took a long time to see. Now, my children are mostly with me and I have the best job I've ever had. I am HAPPY at work and even my worst day is better than my best. I haven't been innocent either, but I know my sins can be forgiven. I have repented and my life finally makes sense.
I'm 31 and far from the best position in life, I contemplate suicide often so I needed to hear this, life is FAR from fair or easy for anyone but we have to work through it and try to cope with potential issues ahead of time. Life is not fair but God is good. Thank you Antonio! All the best from the U.K,
Sean
Thanks for sharing your story. I agree - life is never fair but we have to learn to deal with the hurdles and obstacles to be better. Wishing you the best in 2022.
Man, when you become 45 like me, you will understand that 31 was your perfect age. Just move on. Don't waste your time.
I've had similar thoughts,though I just curse it n get busy,all I can say is finding stuff that I like,n sarounding ur urself with people or things that u like, does help
Come on Sean ! Keep your chin up and enjoy yopur life as a great gift ! All the Best !
@@Jepousseuncri I appreciate the advice and the kind words. Thank you. All the best!
90's childhood in Eastern Europe( only Eastern Europeans will understand this) from 22 to 32 years I spent 10 years on the run helping my brother to escape jail( no job, no careeer) from which 2 years sleeping on the streets, while we were hiding my brother got cancer, and using my identity he underwent surgery. 4 years of peace, I go to uni, I take my degree, and take my first job at 33 years(!!!)
16 months before his jail sentence would have been canceled( prescription), he dies in a car crash.
I'm 37 now, changing careers, drinking a little bit too much, and overweight, but as always, moving forward. My grandpa Survived Stalingrad, Ukrainians are surviving a war, and I will survive a basic drama.
Your life is for a movie.
That's quite a story...
You're gonna make it. Keep going, bro. Strength and honor!
I work as a nurse in an ICU. I have been at the bedside numerous times alongside people saying goodbye to their loved ones. I've held the hands of countless dying people. I've coached so many people through these tough situations. Everything you said really resonates and in my experience rings true.
Saying goodbye is hard. A lot of difficult emotions come out based on a person's history. People grieve in different ways. Some people handle things in a really healthy way. Others... Not so much. I believe people often don't realize why they act the way they do - maybe because they feel guilty for how they've spent the last few years. The family member from another state shows up and wants EVERYTHING done, while the other family member who has been there working as the caregiver for the last few years has a much more comprehensive view of how they've reached the point of where we accept the end of life. Things can get really ugly.
Truthfully, the best shifts of my career are most often the ones where I help someone die comfortably and with dignity. Ideally I help the family through this process in a meaningful way, if they're ready to accept the reality of the situation. It's a fine line between encouraging people to ignore everything else and be present with their family member in the final days and hours - while also letting them know it's okay and healthy to go home, do their laundry, make some food, etc. To control the things they can. We'll do our best to keep them in the loop so they're there when the time comes. And even if they're not there at the very end, I always like to let them know someone - often that person is myself - was there holding a hand and speaking kind words so no one dies alone in a hospital bed.
Believe me and most any other nurse whose been around the block when we tell you there are many things worse than death and all too often we go far beyond what I think is right and ethical in a futile attempt to prolong the inevitable. Lots of what I do hurts, and often we torture people when I wish we could instead make them comfortable so they can finally be called home.
I'm glad you spoke so passionately about being open with the ones you love and telling them how you feel. Things can change in an instant, and I've never heard anyone say they wish they worked more.
This was a fantastic video with tons of real, honest, and important information. Thanks for making it.
Thank you for sharing and for your kind and dedicated work. ❤
I feel your compassion & thank you for your perspective. It was hard to lose a loved one & yet still be there for yourself & others.
I had to remind myself to not drop everything, because life continues & we need to keep living.
So while spending time being with my loved one during their last days, I found moments to spare where I ate a great bbq with a church men's fellowship, attended as a groomsman at a close friend's wedding, looked after other loved ones, and took walks during sunset.
Yet through it all I still managed to be there at my loved one's bedside in their last moments, with both our digities intact.
It was hard to shake off a feeling of guilt, even though I wasn't guilty of anything; I had to remind myself that, there's no reason to feel guilty for doing some things for ourselves, esp. when we need it.
You have to keep living; And your loved ones are glad you did.
You brought up some great points. Mom was an alcoholic and when I was about 25 yrs old I had had enough told her to stay away from my family. Well the Narcissist came out and she called people, parents of my friends, and told them I don't know what. 35 years later, my "friends" who I've known since I was 5 still don't connect with me, even after reaching out several times. I spent the majority of my life making sure my wife was happy. Divorced anyway. 1 nervous breakdown later and 5 years wanted to date. That went terribly wrong. Tried again in 07. Right after Christmas got kicked to the curb. Haven't dated since. I feel a need for companionship but nothing else. My 1 son who survived is Autistic and about 10 yrs ago started having seizures. Now it's hang around the house do my work and wait for the next one. So yes Life is not fair. I can keep going but probably commented too much already
Thank you for sharing from Germany
Stay strong brother we with you.
I wish I had seen this when you lost your friends. I would have told you to sue your mother for slander. Did you call your friends and tell them not to listen to your mother and why?
I was sheltered as a child by my mom, and abused by my stepfather.
Fear is everywhere. Women, social interactions, workplace hierarchy. My self worth has been at low levels all my life.
Now I'm 35 and reprogramming myself.
Went to tech school. Graduated, while working full time. Stopped dating. Started focusing more on music, even picked up the drums. And lately.... I've wanted to work out or run more. I have let life tear me down in fear.
I'm just making lists now, and checking off items just as quick.
I sincerely appreciate your honesty. I'm in my late thirties, and it has been an extremely hard time in my life. And hearing people like you helps a lot. Thanks.
Prayers for you and your family
And many prārthanā for you and yours :)
In watching this channel for over 6 years, this is one of the best videos that I've seen on here. The guidance that is provided is useful to any man. It does not matter how old you are. It was a great reminder for me to keep the focus on myself and improve for the benefit of myself. I also find the Serenity Prayer great as well. I say it every day and apply it to situations as needed. There is always more than one narrative on how a story can be made!
Lost a brother to suicide a long time ago so I feel your pain on that one and spent years trying to think of what I could have done. Trust me it will get better over time. I'm 63 now and in a great position in life and just trying to get my mind around retiring. Financially it's not an issue. I work with a great team and I don't really want to lose the engagement and intellectual challenge of solving problems. My fear in life is ending up in one of those early morning senior coffee mens gossip groups you see in every McDonalds in the morning. Yikes!
Thanks for sharing Mike - wishing you great success and the strength to avoid McDs at 7AM :)
Yes, you recognized that pitfall of ending up in a "senior coffee mens gossip groups" I avoided this as well in the form of a wings night, it can come in different forms but a group with a negative vibe should be avoided for many reasons
You can always join a pickle ball league...that seems to be the rage around me these days.
Why not keep working if you want to stay with your co-workers?
Man i feel you. 2008 was my year. Lost a unicorn IT job because my mom died from cancer, then 2 weeks after she died my dad told me he also had cancer but waited to tell me because of my mom. Lost him 2 months later. Spiraled into a depression I never felt before. Snorted Oxycontin for 2 years after that before I got my shit together.
Thanks, Antonio! Great video and advice for us who just turned 30!
I have stage 4 lung cancer, but I am not giving up my future! Even if I fear rejection, I will not let go of the life that is meant for me!
How are you now brother ?
@@mrunknown452 Median survival rate for stage 4 lung cancer is 4 months, so 50/50 he's gone already. Hopefully they found what they were looking for
I needed this video today; life spares us nothing. Yesterday I found out a good friend of mine commited suicide the night before. I'm still in shock, but I know I can deal with it over time and process it properly.
Sorry for your loss friend
Oh my god. I'm so sorry. Please stay strong in this moment. I appreciate that you talk about this.
🥺
I'm 27 & I agree with this, I felt when I prepared and it wasn't enough & I had times when I prepared & thanked younger self that I did.
Story time: At the end of my 20s I developed epilepsy. Did not know until it knocked me down after a 600lbs deadlift and my friends watched. Partial seizures. A blackout but you keep doing stuff not knowing you do them. Like sleepwalking. You come back confused and memory loss. From 5sec to 10mins. Got one on the motorcycle too when I did not know but suspected smth is wrong. I dragged the damn poor thing home and cried for a bit. Still continued my business despite getting seizures in Irland and just waking up in the middle of nowhere. I had to quit everything. Got 7 a day. Sports, arguing, sex, talking, the wrong breath induced one. Fought a whole year to get rid of them, gf broke up. And I did manage to get rid of the seizures, but mum got cancer. She died on new years eve after taking care of her. Once I could get up again from the loss, I bought a motorcycle and took a ride out. Bang, car blindsides me and puts me in the hospital where I just watched mum pass away. Bastards were well insured cab company owners. Said I drove into them the police report stated. I convinced them otherwise. I recovered, forgot those assholes and covid hit the stage putting my business through the wringer. I never grew so much as in the last 3 years. I am still in, still riding, still working. Everyone said I should take it easy, no riding, no risk, to take the safe path. I challenged my neurological state at a hard enduro event. I was breathing to exhaustion and got no seizures. My leg was giving in a bit due to the damn car taking me down. At the event I crashed, overturned the bike downhill and had quite a few bruises and cuts BUT rode back home with a smile and a small tear. I am alive. I am living. We can keep going. I had many late night ride outs asking the dear lord for insight, but nobody answered. Sometimes I even fancied the thought that a 45cal would be quite a cozy way out if things turn really bad. But why? I will die anyways. Until then let's kick the devil's teeth in. I wish you all grit and strenght. And just be good. Cheers. And thank you for the video!
1. You've lived to tell the tale. That speaks volumes about your resilience.
2. Build social capital. If friends and family are not available, you could join a group composed of people going through similar challenges. For example a church or AA for people suffering from alcoholism.
3. Similar to no 2 above, you can consider blogging.
Inspiring, I only hope I can be as resilient as you.
Dude, as a biker I am so proud of you.
So many people give up after a little slip.
Your story males me want to kick the devil's teeth in.
Thank you for posting your story.
I have some shit to deal with lately so thank you for the boost.
What’s holding me back? Childhood trauma, neglect and abuse, mostly. I know I’m responsible for my own life and how those things effect me but, yeah. That’s a pretty rough one.
I feel you 100% growing up confiding in people you can’t really trust or count on has fucked me mentally. I’m learning that being in control of my own future is the only remedy. I’m self employed and at times it’s way more stressful than a regular 9-5 but the freedom from phony people is priceless. Build your future bro you got this!
@@searchforthetruth1998 Thank you for the kind words, I truly appreciate it. Unfortunately this video didn’t really make me feel very empowered today. My therapist often asks where I see myself in ten years and I’ve never been able to give him an answer other than I don’t. It’s just all black square and nothingness.
I hope you go far, brother. I wish you all the best.
One quote that's struck with me in my mid 30 years of living: The problem might have someone else's name on it, but the solution to it has yours.
Ah, man, I just lost my younger brother this year to self harm. My condolences, she lives on through you.
"If life is unfair for everyone, does that mean life is actual fair?"
It's not equally unfair for everyone. It's more unfair for some than others, so no. It's not fair.
Just remember the cardinal rule. “Life is gonna kick you in the balls, then it’s gonna come back and kick you in the face.” If you have balls and or a face, watch out.
@@bioboi808 your right. Some men don’t have balls, and so the kick there isn’t equal to other men. But most every man identifies with having a face.
Yes! The sun rises and sets on everyone, both rich and poor, good and bad. Life is absolutely fair!
i loved the way you looked at the life it’s wise
I lost my son to Suicide, Bro. I can relate. It sucks and you never get over it. You move on, but never over.
Wow, the authenticity and vulnerability you show is admirable! Thanks for this video Antonio. I took away that I need to be responsible in ALL areas of my life. Not just the convenient ones.
Keep taking risks with your channel. I think this type of content will resonate with men and is what we need to positively impact the world!
I always remember the first sentence that appears on Daidoji Yuzan's "Way of the Samurai": The Samurai must remember that one day he has to die. And that's the important thing, knowing that you have to die, you won't fear death.
Great video Antonio.
11:30 The biggest thing holding me back is actually just sheer ignorance of what else I could be doing with my time. I have so little experience in many things in life, that sometimes it literally doesn't even occur to me to do a new way of doing things.
The truth about "taking charge of your own life" (5) was such a hard pill to swallow until the reality of truth 6 started feeling closer in the mid 30s. When suddenly everything is on a clock, it changes your perspective on *everything*.
It's not easy to open up like that. Well done, beautiful mindset. It's not how many times you get knocked down, it's how many times you get back up.
My fear is going back to college and wanting to study finance or something similar.. I’ve been in construction for 7 years currently 30 yrs old and my mind is telling me “just keep it simple” “you make good money” I’m definitely in the comfort zone. I don’t have debt and thats another thing I’m afraid of “what if I spend all this money& time and not be satisfied” i too read philosophy, neuroscience , psychology, and many books..im interested in so many things but society says you need to select ONE career and be happy.
Fuck society. I been broke my whole life. Living month to month. From being 25 years old athlete I become seriously ill because of autoimmune disease, to this day I live in pain. This happened just a few months after I lost my best friend. Then I worked in poor paying slave jobs. I tried to make my dreams come true (art) but failed. Then I get back to what I love when I was very young - programming. I found a job two years later. Now I am working in a fantastic company, with great people finally saving money every month effortlessly. Just be persistent my Bros - life is hard - but we will get there 💪
I don't normally venture in the the comment section, but this video deserves a response. Thank you!!! I have been watching you for a while and this is the best video I have watched. Very timely for the times we are living. Your honesty and vulnerability makes you more trustworthy. Love and prayers to your family and Slava Ukraini
5:17 When i got married the mayor told me a similar saying: you can not change somebody, you can only change yourself. i think thats a good one
I never had a dad growing up and was abused when I was young. Your bonus tip hit hard to me- on how to give love to everyone around you.
You might not see my comment but I'm grateful to see your video every day.
Good stuff Antonio. One of the big ones is that when you stop caring about what others think about you, that's when you are a grownup.
First of all I am so sorry for your loss, I cannot even imagine how that would feel like. I just want to thank you for making content like this, alongside your other videos about fashion which made me subscribe intially. It's conversations like these I've never had the opporunity to have in the past, and I am so glad the younger generation gets to through RUclips, especially if they dont have a good parental figure or guidance otherwise.
These talks are invaluable regardless of gender. You're doing good work, stay real and true!
Being in my 30's this is really valuable info that I'll try to remember so thanks for the video Antonio.
This world offers a lot of intelligence, but precious little wisdom. Thanks for this, Antonio.
One thing that helped me was changing my word usage. We all tend to say that we HAVE to or we NEED to do something. If you just replace words like have and need to the word choose then you understand nothing is a have or a need. It's a choice you make based off favorable consequences. Once people understand this, other things like stoicism kinda fall into place.
My fear is directly tied to the amount of rejection I've received in my life. There was a time I was ask out any woman, apply for any job. I was nervous and scared, but faced it with courage. Courage cannot exist without fear. Now, at 40, I've been rejected on an epic level and the fear of more rejection has made me stop dead in my tracks. I can't take any more. Now I live a life of poverty, soul crushing loneliness, involuntary celibacy and much more. I hate waking up to this life every day.
I have no desire for marriage, and comparing it to my life during boyhood when I wanted it, life is much better. I don't want to have the desire for a wife.
Rather than preoccupying on
a woman, seek God:
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33, KJV)
“Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” (Revelation of John 3:20, KJV)
You gotta have courage. Dating is never easy, and expect to be shot down. Their loss not yours.
I'm really sorry to read what you've been through, I don't have the answer for what you need and I don't know you, but I'm sure you're a wonderfull human being and I wish you for the best. Please, don't give up.
Sorry to hear about that. I think that outcome is much more common nowadays than you think. That being said, I'd like to echo what Rudy T said above. Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousnous. You might be surprised what happens to your life as a result. God bless.
Lost & Found for Our Lord Jesus Christ ❣️🙏 Do not be afraid says the Lord your God..
My Heavenly Father has great plans for you..! Don't give up.. come back to him & to the Sacraments because the Devil is real & he wants to put you down..
Go to the Traditional Mass or Tridentine Our Lord Jesus is with us in the Bless Sacrament the Holy Communion.. He has promised to be with us Until the end of the world 🌎 million of people are lost but Our Lord Jesus Christ is with us He is my best friend I talked to him every day 🌞
Our Lady of Fatima in Portugal talked about this we're in the Last Battle for the Family and Marriage..! For that we are seeing all this Ideologies that wants to destroy God's Creation.. She is going to be the Noak Ark for this times.. but she promised at "The End My Immaculate Heart will Triumph" ❤ That's my Mother a Warrior for his children..
We need Our Man Strong enough to fight back
Read the book from Saint Louis the Monfort to know your Heavenly Mother the Mother of Jesus Christ ❣️
Read the prophecy of Rome 1975 by Ralph Martin My God is preparing a powerful Army for this times..
Check Catholic Match Our Patron Saint is Saint Rafael for people who wants to marry in the future
God bless you & Never Ever give up we need Strong Men's in this difficult times but you need to put the Whole Armor of God 🙏
This year has been really tough for me aswell, Im starting in my late 30's with a life Im unhappy with and feeling depressed. Then I got Covid 2nd time end of June( and this time its been long covid) and then 6 weeks ago got Eustachian Tube Dysfunction which caused middle Ear Infection. This then caused me Tinnitus for first time in my life and its been horrible and stressful last few weeks. Anybody that has suffered will undersand the fear and anxiety this condition can cause with no medical cure! Then my family boiler broke after 15 years and that meant I had too pay for the boiler upfront! This while being on Sick Pay and looking for new career change next year and 3 month intensive course next February! So its been tough and stressful last 6 months! Its defintely made me re-assess my life and the importance of my happiness, love, friendship and self growth! The wonderful self development " Little Things Matter" by Todd W Smith has some great lessons for people wanting to change themselves and stop making the same errors in life!
Great advice for us Gentlemen! Cheers Antonio from UK!
These are applicable at any age from 14 onwards. But what changes for a lot of 30+ men is now they have people looking to them for direction (wether children or employees or younger colleagues or just the younger generation starting their adult lives in general). Wether you want it or not, chances are you will be a mentor (dare I say leader) to some people at some point in some place (if you aren't already). So own your actions, keep yourself together mentally physically etc. be the best version of yourself because you are not an island. You influence other people's lives wether you want to or not.
The thing about comparisons, the principle I try to follow is that I don't have to be better than anyone, except my previous self. If you want to make the world a better place, start with the person in the mirror.
I've been seeing you videos since my earlier 20s and subscribed to your channel in my mid 20s. I'm now in my early 30s and your videos always make me think and evaluate myself, to move from a young idealist to a mature realist.
And fortunately, this video really hits me in the right moment. If God permits, would love to meet you someday and personally thank you for your videos that have brought me to where I am now.
I'm sorry about your sister and brother in law.
Well said. Completely agree. One foot in front of the other and move forward through life whatever happens. Life can beat you or you can beat life. Prepare as much as is practical but whatever happens, have resilience. I've had so many things happen over my 53 year lifetime, from serious illnesses to losing family, and kept walking forward that I'm starting to think I'm Captain Scarlet.
Take control and set a direction.
Love the jacket.
My mom passed after a 10 yr battle with altzhiemers. 15 months later my dad passed suddenly. I went through both extremes to see a parent linger so long and not being able to do anything, then one day talking and visiting with my dad to finding him unresponsive. Either way, I learned your never prepared.
Thank you Antonio, for posting this video at this time where I need it most. God bless you and your family!
Really needed to hear all of these, Antonio. You're like the big brother I never had. Yep, I'm really struggling still. Last time I commented I think was in the lessons you learned from the marines vid. Was struggling then, too, lol. Gonna keep the faith, gonna find a way. A step at a time. Just wanna say thanks for these kinds of vids, you're really helping someone out.
I’m 37, not happy where I am at. Dad left my mom, sister and I when we were 19. But left everything in the red, rent was past due by six months, utilities were about be cut off. My sister and I handled it but it hasn’t been easy. Now I wish to move out but I don’t know how. I feel like I am stuck. We (sister and I) are taking care of two elderly family members, who did nothing to prepare for tomorrow. We’re constantly worried about our future, to which our elderly family doesn’t care since they’re so close to death anyway. I am so at a lost I don’t know what to do.
Take strength from your sister mate. At least you have a companion and partner through your bad circumstances. Invest in her and love her because she is the only person that’s as invested as you are! Life is most rewarding when there is love and at least you have that.
I appreciate the new direction you’re taking with the channel! It’s nice to know we’re all human and that we all have a story to share. Learned a lot about fashion from you in the past and stepped up my wardrobe. Looking forward to hearing you share more about being a well rounded man! Keep it up my friend, you matter!
I was doing good in my early thirties. In the best shape of my life, had a partner and a great job making good money. Had a panic attack at the gym and developed a panic disorder....lost everything. But it's made me realize I had a lot of inside work to do 5 years later still struggling but doing better now.
As a drug and alcohol counselor, I am constantly reminding my clients that they can only control their actions and reactions. If your peace of mind, success, ability to live a happy, fulfilled life is dependent on the actions of others, you are doomed to failure. Phenomenal video!!! And I’m glad to hear you’re a Star Wars/Star Trek fan!!! Wife and I are huge fans as well!!!
Good words. But new star wars are decedent trash “super hero” movies. They’re the cultural equivalent of being a grown man dressing like a teenager. Star Wars is space opera not sci-fi.
It's pretty sad that both Star Wars and Star Trek are being destroyed by corrupt corporations that want an excuse to push for their radically insane agendas.
“It doesn’t mater if you’re a 45-year old man, or if you are a 15-year old young man.” I haven’t heard such great respectful thing to younger generation in a while! :)
Truth to all word in this video. I learned almost all points through trial and error. I am glad that there is someone using their platform to share their knowledge of life with the masses. Thank you for this and may you always have much success.
I had no idea about your sister, Antonio. That's gut wrenching. So happy to see how successful you've become and have truly appreciated all your content these last several years.
Tony, thank you for this video. As a guy who grew up fatherless, I really appreciate these kind of life lesson videos. Grateful for what people like you set out in life to do.
Excellent video. It should be viewed more than once.- months later etc., because life changes quickly, and the advice will always be valuable
Western civilization is in desperate need of tons of tough love. We've been conditioned to think that we are owed everything and we don't hold any responsibilities whatsoever.
Guess what? We are all in for a reckoning, very soon.
Thanks for your video, Antonio. I appreciate you getting more into these topics. 👍
About a month ago, i was going through some things. I had to have an honest conversation with myself. My life is pretty good, but sometimes when things get squirly i had some self destructive behavior, one being compulsive eating. I always felt that i can fix it myself, but i came to realize that i needed to get help and i did. Three weeks working on my recovery. It has also gotten me more focused on finding faith, because i finally realize that i need a higher power to help guide me. I can't do it alone and thats a tough pill to swallow for me.
Antonio, thank you for this video - it pierced me through the heart in the way I appreciate it.
As a copywriter, please make these life videos as I find them humanizing your brand. I love it when I see a man embody being comprehensive in being authentic while providing value with their niche. I've been watching your channel since 2013 or 2014 when I was 15 years old - you're the virtual father figure I admire alongside Jason Wilson and Kobe Bryant.
This year was 1 year of building my copywriting business, then life kicked me in the balls with steel toe boots. Ouch! 😭
I broke up with two mentors (one of them helped me get out of living the THUG life in my youth) and felt lost of what I was going to do with my life. Then those emotions put me in a spiraled out depression where I wasn't doing my best in my business...
These days, I'm very proud I went through that experience as it helped me grow in different levels. I wouldn't have my new men's style, the entrepreneurial men's community I'm in, and a deeper relationship with my copywriting coaches. ❤🔥
Thank you for being the lighthouse in my life and business brother - cheering you on the other side.
P.S I had a blast at your Thanksgiving stream - do more like them as I've learned so much from them. 😊
In a society where it is increasingly commont to see a growing sense entitlement and whining to have the rest of the world adapt rather than working to improve, this kind of hard reality-check talk is much needed content.
The correlation of controlling what you can and dressing well is something I wish I appreciated earlier in life.
Thank you for sharing the Serenity Prayer. I never heard that before.
You encouraged me through this testimony. God bless you Antonio. From Tanzania 🇹🇿
I like how men are more sincere when it comes to advice. If you see most women giving advice is always blaming someone and victimizing women. You are really honest and actually want to help others.
I hope any other women listening take these to heart too. It applies not to just men but to women too! Love your channel and thank you for your videos! ❤
Respect to this man and his family.
Helpful video.
I've been friends with people that utter the words"things aren't fair" and they've sat and are sitting on their hands and not doing anything about it, Antonio sorry for your family's loss
Great life advice for everyone! I love this video!
Love this video. I make it an effort to live by these values, and often I can forget or steer away from them. Videos like these really help remind me of the truths about life and knowing there are others that understand and give some sort of, for lack of a better word, guidance as to getting back on track. Thank you !
Excellent talk. Thank you for sharing. I can definitely relate to the mortality topic. The older I get the more important my use of time becomes or at least my realization that things need to be prioritized.
Just watched this straight after the "Does your clothing disgust women react" video. And what's amazing, is the start of that video you have a plain white background, no intro on yourself, and yet point out that she does these things perfectly (good background, quick intro, tells you who she is incase your a new watcher).
And then in less than a year after that video, you've got ones like this where (whether you took the lessons from that or not) you've implemented each and every one of those improvements.
Really exemplifies that taking responsibility/constant improvement mindset, and it's motivational to me - makes me want to take steps, to get better, and do similar things to my work in my life.
Nice one!
Thank you so much Antonio for sharing. Great point. Everyone is responsible for his/her own life no matter what, we just have to accept what we cannot change, and change what we can.
Your words must be inspiring for many. Yes, we should take our life in our hand, otherwise someone will do it for us. Here is my life story how I discovered meaning of being yourself.
When I was 10 my dad used to drive me to a music school which was about 8 km far from our house in the city, we lived in a village close to the city. Once he took me to his work place, which was en-route to the music school , and asked one of his co-workers (well, one of his assistants) to drive me to the music school. So, we came out of my dad's office and entered to that co-worker's office room, where four or five people were sitting on their desks. I remember, then I proudly compared by myself my dad's office with 20-person meeting long table and his gorgeous armed chair with this bunch of people who were crowded in a small office.
Suddenly, someone from inside my head interrupted my proud thoughts about my dad's office and asked me: "Well, boy. Are you sure you can better than these people, have a separate large working office with leather armchairs and command others when you become at these people age?!"
That voice was so strong, I felt like I was dumped a bucket of ice water. I am sure that was a moment I got the meaning of being yourself. That was, I guess, my inner voice who always comes to my help when I need it.
Now, I am writing these strokes from a warm office, sitting in a leather chair alone in a room with a meeting table, TV set, and sofas for receiving guests and thanking that voice who awakened my mind so early.
Brilliant video, Antonio. Great life lessons that keep us grounded and impact our style in the most profound ways.
"To be or not to be" There is no security in life or any comfort zone.Keep being alive and creative is one of the main solution.All the Best to everyone.Salutations from France
My fear of opening up again is holding me back.
I’m 26 and have had 2 girlfriends. Both left me cuz i was too clingy, which I luckily realized instead of blaming all women. But instead of trying to not be that way i feel like I’m giving up actually. It was already so hard for me to meet girls and now i feel even worse knowing that the ones i get with don’t even want me.
The worst part is now that I’ve stopped trying i get more attention from girls, but i know how i am now and i know they’ll eventually dislike me if it did end up going somewhere. Most of my guy friends have had many girlfriends and my dad was a ladykiller but I’ve been the only one to never really figure it out and the older i get the more I think about my track record and compare it to them and I’m starting to realize maybe they just never were my thing and i should just stop.
Dude, that's BS. Don't let those thoughts conquer your mind. Nothing worthwile is easy. When I fail at something or afraid of something I remind myself that there is a better life behind that fear and there won't be any success without failures. So don't be afraid of trying and failing, It's ok to fail, but it's not ok to let those fails stop you. You got this, man
Bro! At 26 you are just about to be at the stage in life where the power dynamic between men and women inverts. It’s hard to be 18-26 year old man to find love, gets a lot easier after 28 or so. Just be patient brother, they will soon be wanting you and making you feel worthy! Being “clingy” is the same as being invested, and if you have the strength to keep trying you will find a girl as invested as you, I promise.
"While I was still searching but not finding - I found one upright man among a thousand, but not one upright woman among them all." - Ecclesiastes 7:28
Thank you for being so vulnerable with us.
I had an instance where I didn't make a rep team despite me feeling like I trialed well and better than some kids who did make teams. It was hard to accept but my dad and I kept practising and I ended up getting called up to a team to play for. I guess it was a good lesson of resilience and persistence
just went through the roughest part of my life for the past three years. Just got my first real life changing news yesterday. nothing is going to stop me now.
I love your vids, 31 I'm all good, changed my life after reading 12 rules for life by Peterson. Bought a cleaning business and shit are just better when you embrace the responsability for your life. But I'm very lucky so I stay humble because I know how stupid I can be.
Antonio when you hit the topic of "brutal truths men need to hear" I was like wow you where talking to me like a father! Well spoken when you said "you have made a number of choices that led you down a certain path" its true because of me not taken care of myself I landed in dialysis i have FSG it sucks but now I have to face my consequences
Your like a friend here to all man who wants to improve their lives
Toxic relationship are very dangerous for you, your friends and family.
Well said.. just get rid of them.. please..
I naturally never compare myself to others. Only did it a little bit in my later teens. It's a happy thing to not care or compete.
Antonio, you are on 🔥in this video!
Hey Antonio,
You really inspired and motivated today brother .
Marine-to-Marine here. (O311).
I just got kicked in the balls myself and I'm licking my wounds like a wounded dog , and trying to figure out what my next course of action will be.
Thank you!!!
Semper Fi
Rule #7: I am 37 and still have overwhelming fear of rejection in such an extent that it makes me impossible to approach women (if there is no sign or gesture from their side).
I had many encounters, when a little bit of boldness from my side (verbally in form of compliments, or in form of gestures like taking hands) could have opened a door for a romantic encounter. Busted. Many. Painfully regretting them.
After a while started to use "cheatcode": sugardating and it worked out very well. Basically, all my experience and little self-esteem comes from such encounters - until I undermined my financial foundations.
Next thing I am thinking about is some sort of medical help in forms of anti-stress pills so that I can kill off the paralyzing fear.
The basic advice: "just go for it" is useless. The fear is so strong I cannot hide it, and it overtakes me so much that it makes me objectively undesired, unwanted, unattractive.
Any other field, eg work or in friendships, I have no issue whatsoever, on the contrary...
I understand what your going through. The way I overcome the initial awkward fear of approaching a woman first is to breathe then remind yourself if you can go sell those accounts and talk to REAL sharks at work then talking to a woman who could potentially make your life better is worth the risk. You got this bro!
😊 Hello you don't need to be scared of us..! Just relax & be yourself and learn what Antonio is teaching you.. women like man with manners and polite..
You can meet maybe your future wife at
Catholic Match & pray to Saint Rafael he's the Patron Saint for the Catholic Church 🙏
Congrats Antonio, you are one of the absolute best in what you do and help a lot of guys out here!!
I've accepted that life isn't fair, that you need to work hard and be persistent. But lately I've lost every motivation to live. I'm 30, never had a girlfriend, never been close to having one. I don't see a point in living life alone without a family. I'm very asocial, I don't know how to act with people so I don't see a way out of this situation. Hard work isn't bad, but it's bad when you have no idea how to do that work.
Learning how to act with people is similar to learning everything else. You find someone who can teach you (even if it's just the "Charisma on Command" RUclips channel), and then you put in the effort and practice what you've learned.
Just from my experience, I didn't get good at chatting with attractive women until I became good at conversing with people in general. Attractive women are people too, so the same skillset applies. However, this means that you can practice being social with everyone you meet.
Last week I attended a professional party where I knew 2 people, and I wasn't going to spend the party monopolizing their time. I was trying to network with people I *didn't* know. So I followed a piece of advice that I learned from a marketer at my company: I looked for the people who didn't have anyone to talk to (at least at that moment), then struck up a conversation.
Start to behave as real man if you want a family
@@mauriciolguin and how does a real men behave?
Awesome video! Love the quote “Comparison is the death of happiness “
So refreshing to hear life advice from a self-made guy.
There are too many "psychologists" who blame your parents or a bully at school for your current state 20 years later :)
As in you'd take the opinion of someone who tells you "Hey, I've never seen the alleged curvature of the Earth" over someone who has measured the planet with a host of different methods and has had their conclusions validated by others in the field.
@@ohauss You ironically proved the opposite of the point you were trying to make. You can't see the curvature of the planet with the naked eye, so the person saying they can't see it is technically being truthful. Someone who's honest enough to admit that is grounded in their own consciousness and direct experience of life, whereas the scientist has to take a dry, detached, lifeless approach to the question and probably would have a borderline autistic/robotic way of looking at the world that wouldn't be helpful or relatable.
The first person is talking about their direct experience whereas the scientist is substituting their direct experience for a model based on a mathematical abstraction; in other words one deals with actual reality and one deals with mental abstractions that merely describe a model of reality. Which is exactly why the scientist isn't going to be able to give the best life advice, because they're stuck in their own heads and confuse their mental abstractions and mathematical models for reality itself.
Best video of the year Antonio. Thank you for putting out this content along with the style side.
Cool Jacket 🙂
You're so charismatic and well spoken. I really enjoy watching your videos even when some of them don't necessarily pertain to me. You're a pleasure to listen to.
Never, ever say "things are great." People would ask "How's your business going?" I would respond ask me in January.
That's wild about your family
You absolutely nailed this video (sorry, this is an understatement). Great job!