How I Would Fix Apple
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- Опубликовано: 12 мар 2024
- How would you fix Apple?
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How to fix Apple: Appoint Sam as CEO
Apple would realistically collapse, but it would be the best it ever was for a few weeks
Agreed
@@Vex_736I don’t think it would collapse, but they deserve him 😂
Looking at the value of sales I think Samsung needs some Apple
louis rossman could work too
Is this still considered satire? It feels 100% accurate, and perhaps even not sufficient.
The satire is thinking anyone at apple would ever give a shit about the list, I guess
Nope, it's so accurate.
Yes, this is accurate.. all fanboys will never understand..
It's funny because it's true
You'll now be sued by apple for criticizing their products
Sued by the British Governemnt for criticising reality.
😂
No, that's Nintendo's job😂
This is Apple not Ferrari
@@ironspider6851 yes, I know what I'm talking about.
They should put aside their greed masked as "we are different"
100% true but that wouldn't be as funny as listing all minor consequences of that xD
They are different, alright. For all the wrong reasons nowadays.
@@vdochevunfortunately apple phones are still premium, I tried s23,24 and the display switches colors off axes like a knock off Chinese display, the lag in the ui is still there. I want android cause I hate ios limited os but God why is it so hard for samsung to polish their ui?
@@vdochev not mentioning the shutter lag on s23 and s24, like wtf my iphone 13 takes way better photos/videos and has no shutter lag...
@@alexandruciordas4941Mate, you're talking to the wrong guy. I simply don't care about this. I'm rocking a Motorola G6 and I won't get rid of it until it stops working :D I'm waiting for the EU to enforce the replaceable battery and 3.5mm audio jack as mandatory. Only then I might think of upgrading my phone. With the key word being "might".
"Your doing metal wrong " had me laughing on the ground 😂
YOUR DOING METAL WRONG!
The only way they could ever do metal right is to have METALLICA as board members.
*You're
How I would fix Apple: Stop buying their products.
This is the best answer! the open market, you would think would not put up with their shenanigans!
Unfortunately the last time I bought an android. The experience was so rotten that almost 10 years later I’m skeptical to leave iPhone again.
Edit: the iPhone 4s served me so well that my Samsung galaxy s6 seemed like manufactured e-waste.
@@Emoralisseriously Android has come a long way since then. And probably you mistake was buying a Samsung, you should get a Chinese one from Xiaomi, Huawei, or Oppo/OnePlus/Realme, as they're the best
@@alinaqirizvi1441
Samsung or Sony phone are better than CCP COVID-19 Phone.
"your mistake was buying a Samsung" lil bro tell me you don't know what the ever loving hell you're talking about without telling me you don't know what the ever loving hell you're talking about. Samsung blows every single one of those phones out of the water, they don't even come within a millimeter of the Samsung flagships@@alinaqirizvi1441
'make the camera not shake and the back not break'
dude is spitting straight bars
Make Siri do more things than just setting up timers
I'd settle for making Siri do fewer things I didn't even remotely ask it to
The physical SIM card robbery went unnoticed for so many people...
Not unnoticed - it is sorely missed. I refuse to buy an iPhone that does not have a SIM slot - I don't want to be a hostage to phone companies when I try to get a local SIM instead of their overpriced offerings.
That's mainly because everyone outside the USA still gets iPhones with SIM slots.
@@alternatereality7713many people already haven't noticed they're being held hostage every time they sign up for a contract, then you have to go through extra effort to unlock it even if you finish the contract.
Wait you get an iphone without a sim slot.
@@yaygya but usa is like 60-70% of their iPhone sales by volume though, isn't it?
How to fix Apple?
Me: Don't buy form apple
They should make it 5gb iCloud per new Apple device purchased. If I purchased an iPhone, iPad and Mac, I should have 15gb cloud storage
it sounds like a good idea but it has a lot of flaws.
like if you decide to throw away one of your device then you just lost 5gb.
and then you can beat the system by not disposing your old apple product or by buying a lot of old apple products or get it as a hand me down from relatives or friends. that way you can have over 10 iphones. Thats 50 gb for free.(now of course you can create 10 different apple id's to get 50 gb for free but I'm pretty sure there is some sort of limit because it asks for phone number for verification)
also if your icloud storage is based on number of apple devices, and one of the devices break(motherboard damage) you just lost 5gb.
these are a few reasons why icloud storage is determined by the apple-id and not the device.
@@ironspider6851 my proposal is that you only get extra 5gb of icloud per new serial registered
Google gave 15gb back when cloud storage wasn't even a thing and we still have it. I think it's better to install google photos and use their backup services.
Start innovating again.
Sell the iPhone in two boxes, one has the charging brick, charger and some earphones and the other has just a cable. Then again, Apple would probably charge an extra $200 for the first box
apple vision pro
Apple has never innovated. They copy other existing technologies and CLAIM that they innovated. Innovation involves coming up with original ideas that have never been thought of before.
@@aamyushhSword of Damocles - first ever VR/AR headset. 1968. Apple was just a touch too late to the game on that tech too, just like everything they make.
@@AzumiRMdo you use that headset from 1968? Is it better?
@@retrocomputing if I had one I'm sure it would be. There are still a few around though but the collectors will never sell them.
Apple should also stop disabling comments section on their RUclips channel
Nah, that’d require them to use “courage.”
@@doctorcookie5362 Also, think of all the PC and Android fanboys that would spam the comments with pointless arguments for fight that started because some random people on the US couldn't accept that the answer to "Windows vs Mac", "Android vs iPhone" was "The one you like the most and suits you better"
@@VoidPaul97 amen.
@@VoidPaul97The iSheep are the ones who comes into android companies official channels and videos, and in reviewers' channels and vídeos to whine all the time because the iSheep can't help themselves to stop defending their pet mega corporation. WorSHEEPers (or even better: WH0RESHEEPers)...
I thought I was the only person who thought that
Change their philosophy:
Functionality > appearance
Letting users make choices > letting UX "experts" enforce choices
Serviceability > appearance
Cross-compatibility > isolation
Low prices > high prices
The irony is that many Linux projects just copy MacOS ui 1:1 (and the users don't even know about it). As if letting users choice doesn't always work and people mostly stick to thought out solutions
@@retrocomputing I'm a regular huge Linux and Mac user, and I can tell you for certain that they don't copy macOS 1:1. Each open source DE (and distro like in Ubuntu's case) has its own design goals for what it wishes to achieve. Saying that they're trying to copy the Mac is an insult to their efforts. GNOME takes more inspiration from webOS than anything else. Windows copies Plasma these days. elementary has a modern UI, but it's just trying to be its own thing.
That isn't to say there aren't open source projects that do try to replicate parts of macOS though. There's CutefishOS, whose user interface looks a lot like macOS Big Sur. There's GNUstep, which isn't an OS, but an application framework that's a reimplementation of AppKit.
Then there's two projects that try to actually recreate the Mac experience: helloSystem, which mainly replicates the Mac design principles, and ravynOS (formerly airyxOS), which aims to recreate everything about macOS. Both are BSDs, and as a fan of macOS, I'd love to see them mature (or even contribute to them).
@ProductBasement I would partially disagree on some of these software-wise, but otherwise I do agree. The Mac used to be about a combination of functionality and good design, and compatibility with Unix tools, but these days it's just scaled-up iOS with even more proprietary things, and as we know from GNOME, scaled-up mobile UIs on desktop leave much to be desired
@@retrocomputingYou say that clearly as someone who doesn't use Linux. MacOS is like most Linux desktop environments from 10-15 years ago. The bleeding edge of GUI is in Linux. Windows is far behind that. MacOS is essentially a time capsule from the dinosaur days.
@@LawlessNate can you compare gnome from 10-15 years ago and now versus MacOS?
My fixes to apple or iPhones are
1) Get rid of Dynamic Island
2) Bring back Touch ID
3) Do faster charging (preferably 80% in half an hour)
4) updating their software so that it can block withheld numbers
Great, as an Apple user, I agree
Stop buying Apple because Apple will not change anything until it feels the pinch
"You're doing metal wrong" was hilarious lmao
Big kudo for including JRE 🙂 And... last I heard, Apple was just rebranding Google's storage as iCloud. 😛
0:47 I agree with this SO MUCH
I can count the number of times I've used the ultra wide on my iPhone 13 on my hands, but I couldn't possibly count the times I've zoomed into something (only to get a horrible quality picture because it doesn't have a zoom lens)
Let’s make Sam the new apple CEO 😂
How to fix Apple: Only allow Tim Cook to say "That's just incredible!" over and over until we all just *get* it.
I thought you were also going for the under-display camera, remove the notch. That would be a correction for a 7-year-old design problem.
Their CEO and their ego will never lead to any change
"If your plastic can dent metal, you're doing metal wrong!"
😂😂😂
I'd love to see you fix Linux, um, I mean sudo fix Linux!
What do you mean sam is not in sudoers list?
*2 eternities later*
Where was I?
This should be required watching at Apple! And there I was thinking I was the only person that remembers the split keyboard!
It wouldn't surprise me if they had to remove it for patent reasons.
Oh Sam, Sam, Sam. Have you seen the $300 accessory needed to develop software on the Vision Pro? They aren’t going to use your list to wipe their asses. They are using their developers to do that. Brings new meaning to the phrase “strapped for cash.”
Apple advertising Apple Music to me when ever I just want to hear something in my music library drives me insane.
There’s many issues with Apple, but not charging $400 for 16gb of extra ram would be a nice start.
@@Visual_CirKus Which rounds up to 400
@@Visual_CirKus but rounding to the nearest 10 or 100 is common. Rounding to the nearest 401 (I don't think it's divisible by anything) is not.
My gender? I'm a mechanic.
How would I fix apple: shut it down
You forgot to add an SD card slot on their phones and tablet.
Bring back modulable ram on Macs and MagSafe.
No one uses that anymore
@@DavidRamirez-vc8dr use what ?
@@downtownraw2676 SD cards. Unless you’re an octogenarian. It’s such a rare use case, most people would rather not have another useless point of entry
Ah so you enjoy paying a phone or tablet model 200+ dollars for storage space when you could buy a 5TB SD card for 50 bucks ?
Also some people use them to transfer heavy files. Not everyone uses a computer a tablet or a phone just to play Candy Crush
Instructions unclear, the next Apple Mouse will have a headphone jack
I agree I miss the way events use to be live and everything was a live demo
How to fix an apple:
Nope, sorry, I can't think of anything. They're too far gone.
Last one: steve jobs died so you can have your liver so please dont change steve jobs`s design
APPLE: We're all about transparency. That's why we look through your data...
🍎: What you want to look at our build guide and user manual? We'll that's against the law I just made.
Fix apple by: stop making the products value be 1000% less than their price. That's it. It'll fix everything.
The US Department of Justice: "Fine, I'll do it myself"
Fix McDonald's next. When your Big Mac costs more than an actual Mac, you're doing it wrong!
How to fix (big evil company name): Remove greed
Conclusion: Impossible
The split keyboard never left, hold down the hide keyboard button
By not buying there products 😊
How I would fix apple: Include everything in the box for free................AHM* $5000 for the box! *
Amazing as always. Spot on
How to fix Apple: Let Steve Jobs resurrect.
Here are the two things Apple must do before I buy any other products from them.
1) stop ripping people off with RAM and SSD pricing £200 for a meagre 8GB and £200 for a meagre 512gb SSD is an insult ! It should be half that !
2) RIGHT TO REPAIR No more soldering on RAM and SSD's and No more locking down components, so only Apple can repair said device at extortionate prices !
Thank you. You just let me notice my pencil scratched the iPad.
The sheer audacity to put a stupidly giant hole in your screen and call it "dynamic island"
Quickest way is consumer choice. So many of the mentions simply involve not choosing to give Apple money. If people stop buying then they'll have to start actually competing on feature, options, abilities, interoperability and so forth. Currently their users continue to incentivise Apples behaviour, it's taking the EU to force them to offer a few basics
Okay, in Apple’s defense, the base model iPhone 15 is using an A16 chip (last years pro model chip) which was built around lightning and its 2.0 speeds and this years pro model is using the A17 which was designed for 3.0 speeds that USBC supports.
You’ll have at least 3.0 speeds on every iPhone later in September. It’ll just take a year because of how they are doing chip upgrades now.
Who knows, maybe someday it’ll be thunderbolt 4 capable this year too. It would be a cool pro feature
Clone Steve Jobs and ask him to enter his cloned youthful body to run Apple
Hey Apple, stop making flickering screens with PWM!!!
You're doing metal wrong😭😂
After a lifetime android user I thought it may be time to move to the dark side. Thanks Sam for convincing me to never ever ever haha 😂
this list is amazingly accurate, and this is coming from an Apple customer
1:30 that still exists...
Can confirm :)
This video is : SAMBERRY CEO's Guide on How to Bankrupt A Company !!
Meanwhile @🍎: These "flaws" are just the "features" that add character to our products
Fix Apple by not buying their products. I know it's hard, but my patience lasted till last year.
i guarantee that if he was actually being honest this video would be more than a week long and not 3 minutes
its like a soulless dead innovative company trying to innovate again
I wouldn’t fix Apple…its perfect….wait…not the fruit?
I would also add these to Apple: stop requiring iTunes to properly manage your iPhone. Put a freaking microSD slot on the phone. And make them smaller.
Next: Fix Samsung Mobile.
- Put back the headphone jack
- Put back the microSD slot
- Put back the notification LED
- Put Sony sensors back on your cameras instead of your crappy ISOCELL ones.
- Make one of your phones smaller
- STOP COPYING APPLE.
He’s totally right!! Apple you are bastards!! 😂
How to improve Apple... toilet paper? 😂
Fix apple: don't buy it
16GB/512GB is the minimum spec. As a consumer, I could buy these components at retail for around $70. HOW IS THAT A $400 UPGRADE?
How to fix your apple product? Buy a similiar product from any other company. ;) Then have a nice vacation from the money saved, too.
I want DJ Koh to be Apple CEO. I''d say Buckle your seat-belts, The FU***
fix apple? -don´t wirte an Book now.......
Making apple disappear would be the best way to fix apple!
Issues I have with iOS having bought an iPhone 15 Plus coming from Android:
- There is no "close all" button when swiping up on the phone to close ALL open apps
- In the App library you cannot create your own folder nor can you move apps around
- I cannot turn off the widget page (swipe left from home) even if you remove all the widgets
- The keyboard needs an extra row at top that includes numbers
- You cannot adjust the volume separately for Media, Call, Ring, Notification, Alarm, and System
- You cannot toggle between Silent, Vibrate, and On for ring volume
- There is a maximum of 4 columns on the home screen
- You have to slide down from settings to show search
- Search isn't accessible from the quick menu, you need to go find the settings "app"
- Notifications are not robust enough. On Android I can change the notification for each app on what I want to come through and how much information. For instance on Android I can set it to notify me I have a discord notification without showing any information. Doesn't seem to be an option on iOS.
Here are my 2 cents, me being an "Androider" since forever and now using a second hand iPhone 11 as second phone:
- Did u know that you´re NOT supposed to "close all" on iOS? Meaning it´s designed so you don´t need (nor want) to do that! There´s a good short video on Apple Explained channel explaining why!
- FULLY agree with you on the numbers row on iOS default keyboard, but there´s a solution: use Microsoft Swiftkey keyboard, AFAIK it´s the only one that allows you to add a dedicated numbers row at the top (oddly enough, not even Google´s GBoard allows it on iOS, in stark contrast to Android´s version)
- I won´t disagree with most of your other complaints (specially about the notification system limitations), but then I´m pretty much getting accostumed to it and trying to enjoy the differences!
As a last question: why did you moved from Android? Your list makes it appear you didn´t like what you´ve got....
Get rid of Dynamic Island! Just sacrifice top 2mm of the entire screen for essential components and give me a clean screen without this huge black birthmark in the middle!
I fixed apple by switching to PC running Linux and an Android phone and BAM! My life got magically better.
Can’t they just do a pop out front facing camera rather than force us to have a notch or ‘Dynamic Island’?
Apple cannot be fixed and Apple knows it, so they doubled down and made all their products unfix-able 😁
As an Apple user, I can confirm this isn’t even satire anymore. It’s 100% accurate and real
This wasn’t intended to be satire
You forgot the most important thing : make apple products cheaper and price them as much as their counterparts.
Sam, you are a treasure!! This list is a great start, to which I'd add a system-wide back gesture in iOS and and more flexible keyboard options (also in iOS). Keep the pressure on!
correction: split keynoard still exsists, you just have to access it slightly differntly
Thats what happens when tech visionary is replaced by a good warehouse manager. Not much but regularly and in enough quantities.
I'm still salty over the SIM card removal, sticking with my 13 PM
They should learn math at least at the primary school level so that they know that 8 is not greater than 16
How to fix Apple: make them stop being Apple.
please continue the list, i am sure its enough for a whole book.
Have Both Lightning and USB-C at the same time.
I still have lightning accessories, I think it would be great to have both USB-C and Lightning, and a headphone jack.
Instead of having an edge to edge screen, a small bezel area on the top and bottom could both hold upgraded speakers for stereo in landscape, host the front facing cameras and sensors, and accommodate those 3 ports.
Most of my lightning accessories are attachments like microphones and specialized cameras, so they could be mounted on the top.
People have long complained about not being able to charge an iphone while using wired headphones, having lightning and USB-C allows for this functionality, especially if a headphone jack is also included.
How to fix Apple: *let it rot in the extreme lonelyness*
Best way to fix it is to stop buying their stuff. But people will never do that cuz that's what it means to be brain washed.
True. Marketologists are gods nowadays
You forgot the brilliant two-factor authentication on the “objective’ Apple discussions board…
Make hotspot accept connections for as long as it's on.
Google gives you 10GB of cloud ☁️ storage for free 😂😂
I think its 15. At least I have 15 for free.
The toilet paper 😂😂😂
❤I would fix Apple by carving up a potato shaped like an apple...5 out of 5 hats 🎩🎩🎩🎩🎩
i lost my mind " You re doing metal wrong 😂😂😂😂😂
How I fixed my iPhones since 2010: I switched to Samsung.
1:25 This also counts for the titanium iPhone because it breaks easier than the normal one.
apple? ooh you mean that company from another planet... they visited earth? oh.. didn't think so.
Fixing Linux: also known as "using Linux".
Linux is tricky since... Nobody stops you from actually doing that! X)
How to fix Apple? I'd go with assassins I think.
2:20 fuck it, we're doing it live! :)
What the hell is an Apple? is that like a PC except...
- you can't open the back
- you can't modify it
- you can't choose the components
- you can't use many 3rd party apps
- you pay double or triple for comparable PCs?