How Do We Deal With the Years Lost to Bipolar Disorder? (Lived Experience w/ Louise Dwerryhouse) ⌛
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- Опубликовано: 16 апр 2023
- Mental health writer Louise Dwerryhouse offers a heartfelt reflection on her years lost to bipolar disorder, and how she managed to push through challenges and losses in her 31-year journey living with bipolar disorder.
Watch the full podcast episode on Louise's journey with bipolar disorder - #talkBD EP. 30 "My Bipolar Story": • My Bipolar Disorder St...
All talkBD episodes are available on all podcast platforms: talkBD.live
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Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/podcast/16...
There is no such thing as lost years. First of all I noticed, I needed natural sun light, low stimulus- minimum tv/movies, interactions with others, social gathering, quiet time.
I tend to feel the in the park around nature, on nice days with my bare feet touch the grass. Just relaxing, in a calm place.
I love being barefoot in the grass or dirt. I heard that having contact with the earth in barefoot actually has a positive effect on mood. Not sure where I heard it or read it because I am always listening and reading info on whatever. I have a garden and working it gives me tremendous better mood as it is one thing I can do that when doing it, my mind does not race. I feel energized yet at peace at the same time.
@@lesliedavison1725 yes, I'm exactly the same!!! Loved your reply
I have 13 lost years, prior to that I was a high functioning person with bipolar. I was only diagnosed in 2019, and we, my psych and myself, have only just got the meds right. I'm now unemployable due to my age and gaps in my resume, but I still contribute through volunteer work and keep myself stimulated through creativity; art and playing music. Never dwell on the lost years, you're still here and doing the very best you can. I wish you all well.
What do you mean you lost 13 years ?
@@finity9316the years of being sick, unstable, out of control, non functional. So you’re not working or building life skills and problem solving. In fact it’s the opposite where your life is collapsing and often relationships as well. So when you recover you often start over and need to repair damage and heal from trauma and shame of illness. Lost wages, lost career, lost relationships. It’s an immense amount of loss. Does that make sense?
As long term bipolar I can attest to the fact that this is a profound and very deep issue. Sometimes when I look back, from a mature and experienced POV, I realize that I made some truly awful, self destructive choices at different points in my life...but whoever made them wasn't the me I identify myself as being at my core.
Me too.
I’m seconds into this video and already have tears from just hearing first question asked.
It’s hard to live a life that’s so different than others’.
I wish I could heart this over and over. And over. I really need to find fb group with others. I have learned from the ADHD group I’m in - how comforting it is to find that we are not alone in what we feel and experience.
My parents were the greatest parents ever
Mine too
Re: You mourn what was lost. Do not use your depression to trigger your depression. This is a psychoanalytically informed recommendation. I had a lost life -- due to periodic and long bouts of depression. These depressions are a thing of the past -- knock on wood -- but I'm now collecting the peices and regaining a life. Mourning what I lost has helped greatly. Mourning feels psychically real; depression of that sort is life's adversary, something that makes oneself and the world irreal.
How do know if someone you love is being over medicating themselves for their BP 1 sleeping constantly versus really trying to manage the BP1 to live something of a life? Sometimes I feel I'm enabling a wonderful person and giving of myself for their benefit. I myself might be following my own codependent model of a relationship that I've learned.
Wow that sounds tough. These things are always complicated. Some can function treating their bipolar disorder, sone ppl can’t. Sometimes treatment doesn’t work and we fight to recover. That’s where I’m at now and I am non functional at this point.
Codependency is a serious thing I love your candidness. I would need to know more details to comment but if you could find a competent therapist to tease out the details, that would be worth it. If they don’t have the skill set it could be unproductive.
I was stable for 10 years with a full time job for perspective.
@Jo The person I'm with can't do a full-time job and has a doctor she has had for many years. It just seems to me that 12 to 18 hrs sleeping is not living. Of course she does not want me to speak with her doctor. And that is her absolute right being medical.
@@zachmcgrain7815I can’t speak for your person, but I will say that for me - I go between cycles. I’m either unable to sleep for close to 48hrs - or - I will sleep 10-12. It depends on which part of cycling I’m in though. It’s not a situation where the 10-12h is my body catching up for the 48h awake. But it’s days or week of the 48awake or 10h asleep. It’s the worst feeling in the world bc even medicated, I don’t feel that I can change it.
I’ve tried sleeping pills and it was even worse. I decided going without sleep was even better than those damn pills, and this is coming from someone who would love to just be able to sleep like a normal human being. My script was for a 1mg dose…. It made me sleep for 18h!!!! WTH, I’m a mom..:: I can’t sleep 18hrs even on a weekend. Sooo, I tried to cut it in half so that it was 0.50mg….. still slept 14-16h.
The hardest part of all of the chaos bipolar seems to bring is that we appear normal and happy on the outside a great deal of the time. But meanwhile, on the inside, we are screaming and pleading for things to change.
@@Jo-lp1pxMe as well, and am also now in this nonfunctional world. I hate it!!! Not sure how old you are but I’m 44, and the nonfunctional part started about 2yrs ago. Prior to that, I was running a business, teaching special Ed middle sch, and in grad school… without any problems. Now I’m lucky if I remember my name it seems. I’ve given up on thinking I can follow any task from start to completion…. It just doesn’t happen now and it just disgusts me internally to know how capable I am, but that it all seems to feel chained up in a box.