So she has been walking all night with a knife in her hand. They hide in the dark but not in daylight. The gunman must have gone home for breakfast. Why didn’t they take the rifle from the dead man. Why didn’t they go back to the car in the first place? What was he going to do with the can of food, just throw it on the fire?He wasn’t dressed to hike any where- he said let’s go west then he went east ….. oh so bad.
So, she's just going to blindly trust some random stranger to guide her through the woods? And then she gives some story about being hunted, and he just buys that? What? There is a lot of high suspending of disbelief here. 7:49 - How did they not see him? they had lights pointed at him, come on! This is weird. The guy hunting her tries to help her by telling her to hide? What happened to him? what is happening????? 8:54 - I guess he has no peripheral vision, doesn't see her with a knife right there? She just spews out some weird story, with odd, unnatural dialogue about her future being dead and he just goes along with it? Does he know her? I'm so confused. There is WAY WAY WAY too much story here for 12 minutes. You need to set this up, it's way too confusing. It could be interesting if I knew what it was about, I get that you might want to explain things as a reply, but this needed to be a feature or mini series, that's what I'm saying. Loads of things go by and there is no time for it to be impactful, understandable, you need more time to develop it, set it up, make it meaningful, invest in the characters etc. I would advise creating you shorts on one thing, that can be set up, build and payed off, and work on exploring your characters and working on your dialogue so that it sounds more natural. This could be a cool story, it just doesn't have the space here for it. Thanks.
So she has been walking all night with a knife in her hand. They hide in the dark but not in daylight. The gunman must have gone home for breakfast. Why didn’t they take the rifle from the dead man. Why didn’t they go back to the car in the first place? What was he going to do with the can of food, just throw it on the fire?He wasn’t dressed to hike any where- he said let’s go west then he went east ….. oh so bad.
And?????? that's ALL FOLKS!!!!!!!!!!!
Hi care to elaborate, thanks
I member THAT. Oy
So, she's just going to blindly trust some random stranger to guide her through the woods?
And then she gives some story about being hunted, and he just buys that? What? There is a lot of high suspending of disbelief here.
7:49 - How did they not see him? they had lights pointed at him, come on! This is weird.
The guy hunting her tries to help her by telling her to hide? What happened to him? what is happening?????
8:54 - I guess he has no peripheral vision, doesn't see her with a knife right there?
She just spews out some weird story, with odd, unnatural dialogue about her future being dead and he just goes along with it? Does he know her?
I'm so confused. There is WAY WAY WAY too much story here for 12 minutes. You need to set this up, it's way too confusing. It could be interesting if I knew what it was about, I get that you might want to explain things as a reply, but this needed to be a feature or mini series, that's what I'm saying. Loads of things go by and there is no time for it to be impactful, understandable, you need more time to develop it, set it up, make it meaningful, invest in the characters etc.
I would advise creating you shorts on one thing, that can be set up, build and payed off, and work on exploring your characters and working on your dialogue so that it sounds more natural. This could be a cool story, it just doesn't have the space here for it. Thanks.
THIS!!! ☝️☝️☝️☝️
Not able to suspend disbelief on this one.
What the actual HECK?
Hi what exactly?
When she stabbed those two men, there would be blood spraying and she should have a fair amount on her clothing. But, there was none.
Nice short!
Nice work dude
And she trust him smh ,,carry on
Enjoyed it
Nice 👌
Yum you dont no him why tell him your name
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐🚴