Does anyone ever feel really guilty about being excited to hang out with someone, and then worry about whether you would feel the same way with your partner?
Yes! You are not alone. I start “checking” and obsessing when this happens-like am I getting as excited when he walked into the room as I did when my friend walked into the room...then I go down the painful rabbit hole
Yes. Those are heavy and scary feelings and it makes sense that you want someone you trust to comfort you and help the emotions go away. I do think it could be a bit of a compulsion though. Like "if I get physical or emotional comfort, I will feel more secure in my relationship" . I feel it would be healthier, personally, to work with yourself to accept the uncertainty of the situation and come to terms with uncertainty.
I never in a million years thought that other people think "if I learn to love myself more then I might leave my partner" too. This is so validating. I'm not just a heartless psycho 😭 This channel is a big big blessing. Now that I can put a name to what I'm experiencing (ROCD) I have hope of healing from it ❤️
Does anybody else be spooked out if you find anybody else attractive at all than your partner? Constantly testing if you feel a heart palpitation etc. with your partner's image in your head or for the other person you're testing. This disorder is killing me :(
Yes! It's awful. I just try to accept that yes, I am attracted to other persons and that it is normal. When I start getting scared because of attraction towards another person I just tell myself "ok, yes, this person IS attractive. So what?" It's scary. But trying to resist attraction and feeling guilty worsens the rocd. You have to accept this, it's difficult but when you realize it is normal, you'll feel better. Stay strong ❤️
Here I am, suffering for almost 10 years with thoughts I didn't know had a name that is rocd. I frequently had obsessive thoughts about out of the blue being homosexual or, (much) worse, a pedophile. And these thoughts even accured without being in a relationship in the first place.
Biggest struggle hijack I know when I ask anyone about their relationship, how did they know - "you just know"... Thanks for nothing it doesn't help me at all, still confused and questioning non stop... I actually really like, accept and love myself and it was a journey. But still struggle with loving my partner who is so amazing.. Constant questioning since day one :(
Today i have thoughts about ”what if me and my partner are just friends? What are the difference between our relationship and the relationship i have with my friends?”
xSvenyx the thing that works the best for me is just to do something else and not analyze the thoughts. Sometimes i even say to myself ”well who cares if we are just friends? I like him more than all of my other friends and thats maybe enough”. The tricky thing about my situation is that we have a long distance relationship and its really difficult to sometimes catch the moments where it’s obvious that i like him more than a friend. But when we meet i usually can answer my questions bc i tend to sit close to him, hug him, etc. even though i don’t want to do it 24/7. But the distance makes it very difficult when we are apart...
This is one of the best videos you’ve made! I was just thinking of all that. And hearing your words gives me hope to feel love. Sooo relatable. I was afraid that if I love myself, I’ll discover that I need to leave. I totally feel that. Wow. Love makes you heal. Omg. I will ponder of all of these words. Thank you thank you!!! 😭♥️
Love you videos! Thank you. Have you ever felt like this feeling where your partner says " i love you" and you have a moment where you pause and you say I love you back but only because your partner said it and wants to hear it back. However, I know that deep down I love my partner more than anything, I cant imagine anyone else in this world. So have you ever felt that ROCD or anxiety has infiltrated your mind and makes you doubt yourself and your true feelings?
Omg I’ve been dealing with this lately! I feel like because i struggled with the thoughts so much I feel like I’m lying if I say it back but like you said.. I know i’m not.
Sydney Wieland same I have a fear of lying to my partner. For the longest time I would only say I love you when I was feeling “sure in the relationship” which obviously would be temporary and he said a few times “I love you..but you don’t love me” in this kind of sad trailing off kind of way. It wasn’t abusive the way he would say this, he just seemed very sad and confused . I never knew how to explain to him how much I was suffering because I didn’t even understand it myself and didn’t have the vocabulary for it. Now I can tell him I’m having rocd triggers and he is a lot more receptive and less confused. I’m getting better. We will all heal and rebuild our patterns!
Thank you! All of this what you Said was a Ocd thought.. „when i dont love myself i Need to Leave“ „what if when im happy again But realize he isnt the one“. Beautiful Soul Thank you.
You call these theorists brilliant. What I see is the brilliance in YOU. youre so smart thank you for all this. Exactly what I needed to know Not too much not too little. perfectemundo.
You are such a blessing. I can’t thank you enough for this work. Wish I had found you years ago!!! But grateful I have you and this community now. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Is it part of ROCD to also have doubts about my partner feelings towards me? Like during a couple of month I can question my own feelings towards my partner, having doubts and intrusive thoughts, wondering if I truly love him, and a couple of weeks later, I can worry that he might not be in love with me anymore... I know it makes no sens but I wonder, is this ROCD too ?
Ella Geninazzi i think this is completely fine. People with rocd (including me) probably start thinking these thoughs because we deep down might feel guilty for questioning our love for our partner. I’ve had dreams about cheating, and then weaking up all sweaty and anxious. But then i think for my self; this was only a dream, it did not happen, why should i worry about something i havent even done etc etc
I did not understand. I mean, i love my boyfriend. I know that, even though writing this sentence and rocd are making me question my love again right now. But i can not get these feelings you know. I love hugging him, i love kissing him, i love sleeping with his t-shirt (Because we are in ldr nowadays) However, i don't feel like saying "my love, my everything, ily, my babe, my man" to his face. And this makes me really anxious, i need to throw up. As Etta James says "I'd rather go blind than to see my love walking away" But i need help right now.
Hi there, please note that Kiyomi is currently on maternity leave and unable to take clients for 1:1 coaching sessions. If you wish to work with ROCD/RA, feel free to join the ROCD/RA academy. If you are not yet a course member and wish to have your questions about ROCD, Relationship Anxiety and etc. answered, we invite you to join the ROCD/RA Academy here: rocdcourse.com. By joining, you will gain access to excellent tools and resources designed to help you find freedom from ROCD, Relationship Anxiety, and obsessive thoughts. We also have a fantastic community of people from all over the world who will support you in your healing journey.
Kiyomi, please i would like to see a video about ocd/rocd and law of attraction, power of mind. Same topics of the science and spirituality tell us that our mind creates our world and our thoughts create our reality, how we can use this law and this topics in OCD? When we have OCD our problem is about it, about cant control our own thoughts, so how can we deal and not to be afraid of using these things? Thank you xx
I struggle a lot not with my own feelings because I know how strongly I feel about him but that my partner does not feel the same about me and that he is falling out of love with me? Does this class as rocd? I constantly need reassurance and sometimes I worry that I’m closing myself off from him which is the opposite of what I’m trying to do because I have been trying to work through my trust issues but I think I’m really scared to get hurt so I accidentally push him away :(
I feel like the fact that we're all here is proof enough we all love your partners deeply! We can get through this ❤
Thank you ❤
I needed tha😊
Thank you
Does anyone ever feel really guilty about being excited to hang out with someone, and then worry about whether you would feel the same way with your partner?
Dennis Nixon yes, also worrying that I will find I enjoy being with these other people more than my partner and therefore will have to leave
@@christinas.3461 yeah, definitely not nice. It was gone for a few months. now just trying to let go if the fear again.
Yes! You are not alone. I start “checking” and obsessing when this happens-like am I getting as excited when he walked into the room as I did when my friend walked into the room...then I go down the painful rabbit hole
Catherine Hart how do you get over this feeling?
Brooo yeahhhh
Does anyone ever question whether or not they have feelings for their partner? And then miss them and want them to comfort you?
Yes. Those are heavy and scary feelings and it makes sense that you want someone you trust to comfort you and help the emotions go away. I do think it could be a bit of a compulsion though. Like "if I get physical or emotional comfort, I will feel more secure in my relationship" . I feel it would be healthier, personally, to work with yourself to accept the uncertainty of the situation and come to terms with uncertainty.
I never in a million years thought that other people think "if I learn to love myself more then I might leave my partner" too. This is so validating. I'm not just a heartless psycho 😭 This channel is a big big blessing. Now that I can put a name to what I'm experiencing (ROCD) I have hope of healing from it ❤️
Does anybody else be spooked out if you find anybody else attractive at all than your partner? Constantly testing if you feel a heart palpitation etc. with your partner's image in your head or for the other person you're testing. This disorder is killing me :(
Yes! It's awful. I just try to accept that yes, I am attracted to other persons and that it is normal. When I start getting scared because of attraction towards another person I just tell myself "ok, yes, this person IS attractive. So what?"
It's scary. But trying to resist attraction and feeling guilty worsens the rocd. You have to accept this, it's difficult but when you realize it is normal, you'll feel better. Stay strong ❤️
Has anyone ever felt the feeling that healing is completely impossible? That you do not even want to heal? That you live in a lie?
Roberto yes
Yep
How are you now
Yes.
Yes
Here I am, suffering for almost 10 years with thoughts I didn't know had a name that is rocd. I frequently had obsessive thoughts about out of the blue being homosexual or, (much) worse, a pedophile. And these thoughts even accured without being in a relationship in the first place.
Biggest struggle hijack I know when I ask anyone about their relationship, how did they know - "you just know"... Thanks for nothing it doesn't help me at all, still confused and questioning non stop... I actually really like, accept and love myself and it was a journey. But still struggle with loving my partner who is so amazing.. Constant questioning since day one :(
Today i have thoughts about ”what if me and my partner are just friends? What are the difference between our relationship and the relationship i have with my friends?”
Because when i have anxiety i dont feel like cuddling, kissing, etc.
onlydrewz how do you deal with that?
xSvenyx the thing that works the best for me is just to do something else and not analyze the thoughts. Sometimes i even say to myself ”well who cares if we are just friends? I like him more than all of my other friends and thats maybe enough”.
The tricky thing about my situation is that we have a long distance relationship and its really difficult to sometimes catch the moments where it’s obvious that i like him more than a friend. But when we meet i usually can answer my questions bc i tend to sit close to him, hug him, etc. even though i don’t want to do it 24/7. But the distance makes it very difficult when we are apart...
How are you feeling now ?
Your life partner is your best friend!
This is one of the best videos you’ve made! I was just thinking of all that. And hearing your words gives me hope to feel love. Sooo relatable. I was afraid that if I love myself, I’ll discover that I need to leave. I totally feel that. Wow. Love makes you heal. Omg. I will ponder of all of these words. Thank you thank you!!! 😭♥️
Love you videos! Thank you. Have you ever felt like this feeling where your partner says " i love you" and you have a moment where you pause and you say I love you back but only because your partner said it and wants to hear it back. However, I know that deep down I love my partner more than anything, I cant imagine anyone else in this world. So have you ever felt that ROCD or anxiety has infiltrated your mind and makes you doubt yourself and your true feelings?
Omg I’ve been dealing with this lately! I feel like because i struggled with the thoughts so much I feel like I’m lying if I say it back but like you said.. I know i’m not.
Ive been doing the same. So sad... coz i just pause and for some reason doubt...
Sydney Wieland same I have a fear of lying to my partner. For the longest time I would only say I love you when I was feeling “sure in the relationship” which obviously would be temporary and he said a few times “I love you..but you don’t love me” in this kind of sad trailing off kind of way. It wasn’t abusive the way he would say this, he just seemed very sad and confused . I never knew how to explain to him how much I was suffering because I didn’t even understand it myself and didn’t have the vocabulary for it. Now I can tell him I’m having rocd triggers and he is a lot more receptive and less confused. I’m getting better. We will all heal and rebuild our patterns!
Absolutely. Doubt is the basis of OCD overall. Not to give you reassurance as that makes OCD stronger, but it messes with your emotions and feelings
I really needed this video right now 😭 been feeling very disconnected with myself
Thank you! All of this what you Said was a Ocd thought.. „when i dont love myself i Need to Leave“ „what if when im happy again But realize he isnt the one“. Beautiful Soul Thank you.
You call these theorists brilliant. What I see is the brilliance in YOU. youre so smart thank you for all this. Exactly what I needed to know Not too much not too little. perfectemundo.
Kiyomi, you’re God sent 💚🙌
Thank you so much for the work you do Kiyomi Fae! Your kindness, generosity and experience helps so many of us.
You are such a blessing. I can’t thank you enough for this work. Wish I had found you years ago!!! But grateful I have you and this community now. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Is it part of ROCD to also have doubts about my partner feelings towards me? Like during a couple of month I can question my own feelings towards my partner, having doubts and intrusive thoughts, wondering if I truly love him, and a couple of weeks later, I can worry that he might not be in love with me anymore... I know it makes no sens but I wonder, is this ROCD too ?
Yes that's rocd
Your channel is a blessing! 👌😍
Thanks so much I really need this right now
Love u kiyomi- amazing as always 💕
I’ve had rocd and hocd for 6 month now and I’ve been starting to have anxiety about me cheating... is it okay?
Ella Geninazzi i think this is completely fine. People with rocd (including me) probably start thinking these thoughs because we deep down might feel guilty for questioning our love for our partner. I’ve had dreams about cheating, and then weaking up all sweaty and anxious. But then i think for my self; this was only a dream, it did not happen, why should i worry about something i havent even done etc etc
And also, i dont think people who actually cheat or wants to be with someone else is worrying about it, they probably worry more afterwards
@@onlydrewz9465 that’s true
@@onlydrewz9465 I have been dealing with the same
Thing. I really don’t understand why and how this happened I’m just done with feeling like this
love your videos ❤️❤️❤️ so helpful
I did not understand. I mean, i love my boyfriend. I know that, even though writing this sentence and rocd are making me question my love again right now. But i can not get these feelings you know. I love hugging him, i love kissing him, i love sleeping with his t-shirt (Because we are in ldr nowadays) However, i don't feel like saying "my love, my everything, ily, my babe, my man" to his face. And this makes me really anxious, i need to throw up. As Etta James says "I'd rather go blind than to see my love walking away"
But i need help right now.
You are amazing!💗✨☺️
Omg! I love this video and I need subtitules 😂💗
Hey kiyomi I want to talk to you so urgently when can I contact and how I ll be paying you even plz just help me out plz
Hi there, please note that Kiyomi is currently on maternity leave and unable to take clients for 1:1 coaching sessions. If you wish to work with ROCD/RA, feel free to join the ROCD/RA academy. If you are not yet a course member and wish to have your questions about ROCD, Relationship Anxiety and etc. answered, we invite you to join the ROCD/RA Academy here: rocdcourse.com. By joining, you will gain access to excellent tools and resources designed to help you find freedom from ROCD, Relationship Anxiety, and obsessive thoughts. We also have a fantastic community of people from all over the world who will support you in your healing journey.
My cycle seems to trigger it alot of the time. Is that normal?
Thank you
Kiyomi, please i would like to see a video about ocd/rocd and law of attraction, power of mind. Same topics of the science and spirituality tell us that our mind creates our world and our thoughts create our reality, how we can use this law and this topics in OCD? When we have OCD our problem is about it, about cant control our own thoughts, so how can we deal and not to be afraid of using these things? Thank you xx
Is monogamy our destiny?? I don't believe it but I cannot let my relationship!
I couldn‘t quiet grasp it in the video so sorry that I‘m asking... but how can I love myself... What are the steps I need to take?
Will this 28 day course happen again?
I struggle a lot not with my own feelings because I know how strongly I feel about him but that my partner does not feel the same about me and that he is falling out of love with me? Does this class as rocd? I constantly need reassurance and sometimes I worry that I’m closing myself off from him which is the opposite of what I’m trying to do because I have been trying to work through my trust issues but I think I’m really scared to get hurt so I accidentally push him away :(
You might want to look into insecure attachment styles
whyjen thank you :)
We can’t sign up for this anymore ?
THANKS
Hi! How can i message you privately ?
All r true
🙏
Hoppas du ser den här videon, L