The Boy Crisis Explained - Why America is Producing Weak Men

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  • Опубликовано: 26 авг 2024

Комментарии • 4,7 тыс.

  • @VALUETAINMENT
    @VALUETAINMENT  2 года назад +47

    Check out Official Valuetainment Merch here: vtmerch.com/

    • @thelastaustralian7583
      @thelastaustralian7583 2 года назад +1

      Looking at the generational social psychological conditioning of the foreign Corporatized Captivated Australian social system . Post WW2 to present Day. We are all being seriously Transhumanized into emf/emr Zombies .

    • @JamesLakeShow
      @JamesLakeShow 2 года назад +2

      @@thelastaustralian7583 Yeah check my video on weakness and why it repels women. I just uploaded it, its a real problem in todays age

    • @thelastaustralian7583
      @thelastaustralian7583 2 года назад +1

      @@JamesLakeShow thanks James, most of the time i believe i am communicating with a Ai''youtube coverttherapist....how do y counter generational hypnosis ?

    • @georgevavoulis4758
      @georgevavoulis4758 2 года назад

      Too much BS on trash talk shows ,news media ,entertainment media and brainwashing by anti male female teachers in schools

    • @nickkings7881
      @nickkings7881 Год назад +1

      Social Bribe is just like Psychological Wage that propagated racism in America

  • @hollandj15
    @hollandj15 2 года назад +2530

    "We weren't dominated by patriarchy. We were dominated by a need to survive" That's the truest statement pertaining to gender roles I've ever heard.

    • @bettermanchannel770
      @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +125

      Life requires masculinity. Stronger Sharper and solar men

    • @widen_inhorizons
      @widen_inhorizons 2 года назад +16

      Stupid because if we were dominated by the need to survive which results in patriarchy that still means we were dominated by patriarchy no matter the reason

    • @hollandj15
      @hollandj15 2 года назад +228

      @@widen_inhorizons This may be true but you’re missing the ultimate point which is that human survival is what determined gender roles, not Men’s desire to oppress women which is the way the conversation is often framed in today’s world.

    • @bettermanchannel770
      @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +47

      @@widen_inhorizons I get what your saying, but we're dominated by life, life requires the strong. To create, innovate, to dominate the environment and the enemies, this lead to the most suitable culture that of patriarchy, men being strong, logical and less emotional thus leaders of reason, man created patriarchy by aligning with life's causation of survival instincts. Maybe it would be better said that life required patriarchy not man.

    • @Je.rone_
      @Je.rone_ 2 года назад +16

      Jeremy has a good point

  • @Onepointmessage
    @Onepointmessage 2 года назад +1630

    The problem is people don’t even know what they are anymore. A boy doesn’t even know whether he is actually a boy or not. Crazy times.

    • @mkultravibes7763
      @mkultravibes7763 2 года назад +108

      That’s part of the transhuminism agenda they are implementing

    • @Macheako
      @Macheako 2 года назад +28

      We know who we are.....

    • @prolificlife1710
      @prolificlife1710 2 года назад +54

      I feel you on that one. Crazy times indeed

    • @bettermanchannel770
      @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +54

      It's truly becoming the standing for everything requires you stand for nothing, culture growth is stunted, you don't offer a kid 1,000 options because they will be unable to choose or they will choose everything, a society of boys given and even promoted to choose everything can never become anything. Rules are required because it narrows man unto a direction conducive for manhood.

    • @ccampbell7214
      @ccampbell7214 2 года назад +3

      Yeah

  • @Mary-io1mb
    @Mary-io1mb Год назад +231

    The most DAMAGING thing a MOTHER can do in front of her children especially her male children is to BAD MOUTH their father. The WORST thing a father can do to his children; especially his male children is to be a ABSENT father. This segment explains a lot. Thanks Dr. Have to get his book.

    • @durkhadurkha4666
      @durkhadurkha4666 Год назад +9

      Unfortunately, they both happened to me. If I could only quantify and express the effects it has on me to this day. I've learned you dont really get over it, you just learn how to deal with it. But I could be wrong of course....

    • @g.m.5395
      @g.m.5395 Год назад +2

      @@durkhadurkha4666
      You're not wrong my friend

    • @g.m.5395
      @g.m.5395 Год назад

      *YES* 👏👍👌

    • @Ragman312
      @Ragman312 Год назад +4

      Ya, this was my childhood, mediating arguments between a severely depressed alcoholic mother and a father who had trouble expressing emotions and was never present in my life except when punishing us or telling us to be quiet. It leaves a mark, a hole that cannot be filled and before you know it, your driving down the street thinking the only reason you don't drive off the road is b/c it's easier to keep moving forward in mediocrity

    • @maryhalverson5713
      @maryhalverson5713 Год назад +4

      Neither parent should bad mouth the other, but it happens all the time anyway, with neither side admitting to it.

  • @gabrieljordan8015
    @gabrieljordan8015 Год назад +259

    We all know what these men are saying is true. The question is when is society going to acknowledge it?

    • @Knuckledragnation
      @Knuckledragnation Год назад +4

      I agree in what this man is saying as well.
      I was curious on what you wanted society to acknowledge?

    • @ENIGMAXII2112
      @ENIGMAXII2112 Год назад

      Yes we do, we all know what these men are saying is quite very true.
      When is society going to acknowledge it, what was coverd in the talk..?
      I personally don't see it any time soon. They simply don't want to...
      But then again that is as to why movements, more like an alterntive new life styles for men. MGTOW comes quickly to mind, are getting more and more attention by men. Who know there is something very, VERY wrong with society/ the "system". In how they want to bury men alive. In how they have an, "men are disposable commodity" approach/ attitude..
      We are not buying into that Crap any longer. More and more men are rejecting that lie called marriage, rejecting society/ the system, and the corrosiveness of it all. More and more men are turning their backs and gving a def ear to the lies.
      Sooner or later, society/ the system, shall feel the change. Through those actions, alone that they shall, indeed, feel the change.
      It may take while, largely because of one factor alone, DENIAL....

    • @lickalotlickalot2210
      @lickalotlickalot2210 Год назад +1

      Society won't acknowledge it as long as women are in control of the media, the raising of kids and in the educational sector. New generations are growing up by single mothers thinking from female point of views!! Those already grown hate men through the lies told by the media...

    • @lickalotlickalot2210
      @lickalotlickalot2210 Год назад +17

      @@Knuckledragnation Read the title that would help lol

    • @geton411
      @geton411 Год назад +16

      When the mass shootings increase from angry dudes in they’re 20’s with nothing to loose

  • @DemetriPanici
    @DemetriPanici 2 года назад +1859

    *“Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.” - Marcus Aurelius*

    • @nickvledder
      @nickvledder 2 года назад +19

      Is writing books and having a youtube-channel for those so called alpha-men? Haha!

    • @ssrmy1782
      @ssrmy1782 2 года назад +25

      Fine words from a slave-owner

    • @spaceantelope1
      @spaceantelope1 2 года назад +91

      @@ssrmy1782 maybe don’t judge people from the past by the standards of today✌️

    • @ssrmy1782
      @ssrmy1782 2 года назад +48

      @@spaceantelope1 Missed my point entirely. He was saying don't bother questioning what a good man is, just be one. That's stupid because a good man in ancient Rome owned human beings. In short, we must always ask ourselves what it means to be a good man.

    • @MichaelTomlinson00
      @MichaelTomlinson00 2 года назад +48

      @@ssrmy1782 the source of the truth doesn't change the truth

  • @dashley2525
    @dashley2525 2 года назад +590

    My college advisor asked me what I wanted to be. I said employed. I worked 42 years after I fluked out of college. I am ordinary. Nothing special. Everyone disliked me. I worked at low paying jobs and survived. I was not worth suing so I did not marry till 55. We have 2 kids. I am retired in the Philippines and well off. US society did not work out but I was fine in the end. So if you are not so great, don't give up.

    • @GUITARTIME2024
      @GUITARTIME2024 2 года назад +70

      You sound like me. I've been generally disliked (or tolerated) in my life, and it's a tough thing to admit, honestly. I could feel it happening even around 8 years old. Life has a way of letting you know that you are low value and not someone who clicks with others. My wife and kid and my health are all I care about.

    • @arranpattison5809
      @arranpattison5809 2 года назад +50

      @@GUITARTIME2024
      The way I see it is if you pay your way, look after your family and don't make life hard for others then you are ' the salt of the earth'...
      If everyone does at least that then life is worth living my brother!
      Take care...
      😊👍

    • @Trump-A-Bad-MF
      @Trump-A-Bad-MF 2 года назад +8

      Are you sure those kids are yours??
      If you married at 55 did the woman have 25 or 30??

    • @iluvit365
      @iluvit365 2 года назад +4

      👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

    • @swisschalet1658
      @swisschalet1658 2 года назад +10

      "Everyone disliked me". Really? How do you know that? And if you actually believe that, can you explain why you think everyone disliked you?

  • @everchangingworld11
    @everchangingworld11 Год назад +10

    As someone practicing in the field of Psychology. I believe Dr. Farrell's ideas on communication and simply listening to solve the problem are spot on. Most often women don't have a problem that can be solved with a tangible solution. Often it is the intangible solution that is most effective. In all my past relationships that have failed, it has been miscommunication or ineffective communication that has ended things. Man or woman everyone likes to feel heard and valued.

  • @Ireneluv76
    @Ireneluv76 Год назад +56

    I'm married, hubby was the firm one but I always gave in. Our sons are in their 20s. Dude's explanation on Postponed Gratification is literally why our youngest needed more structure from me. So much potential, not enough discipline. Tough to hear. He'll be okay, but yea. Dang.

  • @113charlie7
    @113charlie7 2 года назад +1320

    Not gonna lie 20 minutes in and I realized every man has gone through all of that shit he's talking about at some point in life. Love ya bros fight that depression! 💪

    • @southie3177
      @southie3177 2 года назад +8

      👍☘️👍☘️

    • @reencollett6835
      @reencollett6835 2 года назад +11

      Great, Charlie! At 24.00 : reminds one of ROTK /LOTR, where Aragorn says "...the same weakness - the same blood flows in my veins..." and he pressed on regardless and became King!

    • @zacharyb3991
      @zacharyb3991 2 года назад +2

      HEAR HEAR

    • @Yarblocosifilitico
      @Yarblocosifilitico 2 года назад +2

      indeed

    • @113charlie7
      @113charlie7 2 года назад

      @@reencollett6835 EXACTLY

  • @nelsoncharlesif
    @nelsoncharlesif 2 года назад +670

    If you take a step back and realised that it’s a fact that the more developed the country is, the more feminine the men gets. In my 3rd world country, what we do here often called toxic masculinity by the first world countries.

    • @manvendrasingh5098
      @manvendrasingh5098 2 года назад +189

      hard times create leaders and survivors. luxuries give you nothing to fight for and strive thus weakening you.

    • @RenegadeRanga
      @RenegadeRanga 2 года назад +61

      Socialist subversion

    • @nelsoncharlesif
      @nelsoncharlesif 2 года назад +30

      @@manvendrasingh5098 absolutely brother

    • @nelsoncharlesif
      @nelsoncharlesif 2 года назад +12

      @@RenegadeRangayes bruv

    • @bettermanchannel770
      @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +90

      Very accurate, developed countries are usually at peace, this peace allows for more intellectual growth, the mental over physical, we enjoy luxuries and become soft. When a cultures basic need is to survive, get food, protect themselves from the enemy, then there head is always up and prepared and this requires the animal instinct of masculinity and strength.

  • @jonathanameyo3608
    @jonathanameyo3608 Год назад +4

    "We've gone from fathers knows best, to fathers knows less."
    That hit hard.

  • @lorenzocardenas5071
    @lorenzocardenas5071 2 года назад +38

    This is actually legitimately scary and what’s scarier is that almost “adults” see it the only people that see it are our gfs… but it’s rare for our fathers and men in authority positions to see this and actually try to help. We seriously need a lot of support because this is a silent situation and it’s hard to articulate what’s going on and get proper help.

    • @erinh9267
      @erinh9267 Год назад

      Poor men. Not necessarily weak men. And, the billionaires are causing that. Unions and worker and civil rights protect the poor from the billionaires parasitically leeching off the poor.

  • @heyyoungmantv
    @heyyoungmantv 2 года назад +785

    STAND UP YOUNG MEN AND TAKE YOUR PLACE IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT SOCIETY SAYS! YOU ARE LEADERS!

    • @Je.rone_
      @Je.rone_ 2 года назад +6

      😃

    • @YoungJon
      @YoungJon 2 года назад +6

      America will produce stronger men when y’all RELEASE THE M.S.O.A!

    • @saud7209
      @saud7209 2 года назад +7

      @@YoungJon what’s MSOA??

    • @discernment8963
      @discernment8963 2 года назад +7

      @@saud7209 I'd be interested in the answer to that myself also.

    • @discernment8963
      @discernment8963 2 года назад +11

      100% true. The upside down ridiculous anti Nature movement encouraged by the Leftism calling so many of the shots today is crippling.
      If your opinion's opposite mine, and what the Dr's siting isn't enough for you, I encourage you to look at unbiased statistics on pretty much anything and everything with an open mind. Work smarter instead of harder.

  • @sme-talks
    @sme-talks 2 года назад +254

    Men issues are not taken seriously and ruled out almost immediately when spoken of. Hence you see high levels of depression amongst men, as they keep it all in and when they speak out they get shut down or cancelled.

    • @healthyhim
      @healthyhim 2 года назад +19

      We gotta help each other now more as a brotherhood less of a fatherhood

    • @ccampbell7214
      @ccampbell7214 2 года назад +3

      That is valid assessment at this point.

    • @omgeoh
      @omgeoh 2 года назад +12

      Highly doubt a therapist or a friend will “cancel” you for expressing your feelings. Cancel culture is annoying as hell but the word “cancelled” is thrown around more than a baseball.

    • @fatmunch6318
      @fatmunch6318 2 года назад +15

      @@omgeoh your therapist will damn near bankrupt you and give you value advice such as head nod and head shake and let’s not forget the all important chin scratch

    • @fatmunch6318
      @fatmunch6318 2 года назад

      @@healthyhim do what you gotta just don’t get suicided

  • @fitlife1205
    @fitlife1205 Год назад +223

    Every single word he said in this interview made sense even though I was raised by my single dad…. Eye opening stuff

    • @chriscooper4317
      @chriscooper4317 Год назад

      Coolnifhet

    • @jessedevilbiss8436
      @jessedevilbiss8436 Год назад +12

      Being raised by your father is much better than by just your mother.

    • @kevin.afton_
      @kevin.afton_ Год назад

      He talked in general, there are always exceptions.

    • @brianmeen2158
      @brianmeen2158 Год назад +1

      You were better off being raised by a single father than single mother. Only men can raise boys to be men. I think the opposite is true with women - only a woman can raise a girl to be a real feminine woman .

    • @sambistabeauty
      @sambistabeauty Год назад +4

      Actually, you can complain with zero discrimination. It's women who get discriminated for complaining. Karen is an example of women's discrimination

  • @lucindalaree9265
    @lucindalaree9265 Год назад +127

    I remember the heartbreaking scene In Walk The Line when the Johnny Cash character is sharing a story about his band mates and fans and his wife freaks out and tells him she never wants him to speak about his work or tour when he is home. He says I work so much to provide you this beautiful home and all your pretty little things…..it’s was so disheartening

    • @liammhodonohue
      @liammhodonohue Год назад +3

      @lucinda LaRee I'm reminded of the story of the old man and the goldfish.
      The old woman is never happy. After their hovel is upgraded to a house, to a mansion, to a palace to a bigger palace...

    • @artkitectbeats1622
      @artkitectbeats1622 Год назад +12

      Powerful scene, and great movie. Sadly the lack of appreciation depicted in that scene is far too common in relationships from both parties.
      Although it's easy to view his wife as the villain in that scene, I remind myself that we were only seeing it from Johnny's perspective. Its easy for us to ignore the fact that his wife probably felt very unappreciated as well and very scared that there wouldn't be a place for herself in Johnny's new-found success.
      Sure, he gave her the nice house and all those pretty little things but what she really wanted was her husband.

    • @andrewdominowski4631
      @andrewdominowski4631 Год назад +7

      I believe You missed the point. He did that for him. The love they had, all she wanted was him. He convinced himself what he was doing for him was actually for them. That’s literally what makes his version of hurt so powerful

    • @bdmenne
      @bdmenne Год назад +1

      Being away from family has them wilt on the vine. The Amish understand this so they work close to home away from Worldly temptations, their efforts both apart and together are tangible.
      A man having a road family makes any money he makes worthless.

    • @ddollarz567
      @ddollarz567 Год назад +2

      But we have to listen to our girls when they come from work talking about everything that stresses her my god this being goin on forever 🤦🏻‍♂️

  • @tmrpeace807
    @tmrpeace807 2 года назад +52

    I have boys and a stronge personality husband in the house. Our boys were not raised with T.V. or going to traditional school. My youngest at 14, works as much as he can for a fast food place, gets up every morning and rides his bike to the gym for 1-2 hours, he goes to school a couple of days a week, buys his own supplements and specialty foods from the health food store, is in charge of his own bank accounts and has chores around the house. He almost bought his 1st car the other day but he decided to wait for another car. This son is very persistent and driven. My other young boys have jobs, save their money in investments, have chores around the house, and manage their bank accounts very well. All my boys pay for their own car insurance and personal expenses. One thing I can say, both parents have to invest the time into their children, so they can be productive people. It's not an easy job for a parent but we do it out of love. I want all my boys to be stronge successful grown men.

    • @marcoi7035
      @marcoi7035 Год назад +8

      Doing a good job 👍

    • @danieldesjardins4074
      @danieldesjardins4074 Год назад

      Are they happy?

    • @tmrpeace807
      @tmrpeace807 Год назад +5

      @@danieldesjardins4074 yes, they are happy. 2 of them are very social and have a lot of friends. They are always doing something. The youngest is 16 and prefers to make money than be with friends. He just started day trading a few weeks ago and loves it. This son also has his own business and is in the process of selling his business for a profit. They are all generous with their money too.

    • @darrenmurray861
      @darrenmurray861 Год назад +2

      Likewise. I wouldn’t personally say that I am a strong man and certainly haven’t gone through life without my own issues, but confidence in myself and in the support for my children (2 boys) is very important to me and my wife.
      For us, our marriage is about working as a team to support and guide our children; to ensure they have the best education we can provide.
      I want my boys to grow up and live as strong independent and confident individuals. As soon as they begin to work, they will be paying a fair rent towards the upkeep of the home and assuming we do not need this money, it will be saved away for them toasts their first home. Regardless, boys and girls for that, need to learn to stand on their own two feet as individuals.

    • @erinh9267
      @erinh9267 Год назад

      Poor men. Not necessarily weak men. And, the billionaires are causing that. Unions and worker and civil rights protect the poor from the billionaires parasitically leeching off the poor.

  • @egobaby4246
    @egobaby4246 2 года назад +236

    "Weaken the men for the fight, for the women and children shall be our prey"---the purple king

    • @blaga19
      @blaga19 2 года назад +10

      what is this from

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +19

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

    • @morefreedomplease
      @morefreedomplease 2 года назад +21

      @@joedonzi9552 The lavender mafia that infiltrated the Boy Scouts bankrupted that organization.

    • @tonyrichengod9280
      @tonyrichengod9280 2 года назад +1

      WORD

    • @satoshinakamoto7253
      @satoshinakamoto7253 2 года назад

      @@blaga19 ancient civiliaations

  • @brigittebeltran6701
    @brigittebeltran6701 Год назад +61

    Excellent commentary! As a teacher I see this clearly...Sadly, most of my male students live with their mothers and the results are beyond devastating. I have little boys coming to school wearing fingernail polish and bracelets! My heart breaks daily. 💔

    • @shaynia-shai
      @shaynia-shai Год назад +5

      You do know boys in early times wore fingernail polish- it was fine. Men/boys wore dresses/robes, skirts or kilts, high heels, bracelets, etc. I think you don't understand what is considered men- it's not by their attire, etc.

    • @princessmari5063
      @princessmari5063 Год назад +14

      @@shaynia-shai 🙄🙄🙄🙄

    • @brigittebeltran6701
      @brigittebeltran6701 Год назад +9

      @@shaynia-shai It's FEMININE!!!!!

    • @shaynia-shai
      @shaynia-shai Год назад +1

      @Brigitte Beltran: So what? if it is, it's now considered féminine before it wasn't- remembered rock star men paint their nails, and wore makeup- so that different? There are féminine men and masculine men - just as féminine women and masculine women. If that's how they want to live their lives.. who are you to tell some1 not to? I find people that are focused on people's choice of living have no life on their own and too much time on their hands. Focus on you. You're worried about boys with fingernails? There is homelessness, hungry people, and so many things to help fix in the world but you're worried about a boy that chooses to be a féminine boy. You are a joke, go volunteer and try making your neighborhood better stop enforcing your views on others.

    • @markmanzo2488
      @markmanzo2488 Год назад +7

      @@shaynia-shai Yes but they don't any more, and we don't want to.

  • @johnkalafatidis4054
    @johnkalafatidis4054 Год назад +6

    Love and respect the way you conduct an interview very professional and very well done with the questions you ask and the flow of the content

  • @goban2
    @goban2 2 года назад +278

    I read his famous book "The Myth of Male Power" over 30 years ago. His insights on how power is conceived radically different by both sexes was worth the price of the book.

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +11

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

    • @dkroen17
      @dkroen17 2 года назад +3

      @@joedonzi9552 Actually, the Boy Scouts had a hand in that, due to a lot of lawsuits.

    • @dkroen17
      @dkroen17 2 года назад +4

      Thanks for the book recommendation!

    • @eddenoy321
      @eddenoy321 2 года назад +31

      Zane Murphy Yes I read it too. After reading it in my late twenties, I resolved never to get married or have any children. Much later on, I worked in Japan and, in my early 40's I finally married a Japanese woman. She did quit her corporate job she had in Japan and I was a bit leery about that at first. But she boosted our collective assets together and this fact gave me great confidence in her. We have been together for 26 yrs. We moved backed to the USA. She has always accepted living below our means and saving money. We have grown old now and have no children. Today we have more assets than I ever thought we would have (not from inheritances). When I die , I will pass on my estate to her and eventually to her nieces and nephews in Japan. I could have never done that with a Western woman. I consider myself to be one of the lucky ones.

    • @goban2
      @goban2 2 года назад +2

      @@eddenoy321 You made the right choice. Congrats On a successful marriage.

  • @Appathetic_Substance_Abuse
    @Appathetic_Substance_Abuse 2 года назад +242

    I like practicing being stoic. I filter the negative feelings through comedy and music. Stick together men, dont put eachother down, lift eachother up. If somebody is struggling, emotionally or otherwise, dont dismiss it as weakness. Help them become a stronger person.

    • @Yarblocosifilitico
      @Yarblocosifilitico 2 года назад +10

      wise words

    • @technikal270
      @technikal270 2 года назад +9

      Agreed, but there's times to rise above feelings and emotions and still think logically.

    • @chrishouston1708
      @chrishouston1708 2 года назад +5

      Well said!

    • @herokillerinc
      @herokillerinc 2 года назад +7

      This is a great comment! Great sentiment. I am attempting to reconnect with the world but also to do so in a more stoic and affirming manner, understand my weaknesses and move Beyond them and place the Adaptive mechanisms see what I can truly be. I bet you'd be a cool friend to have.

    • @heismightytosave527
      @heismightytosave527 2 года назад +3

      Amen!

  • @justmyopinion9883
    @justmyopinion9883 Год назад +10

    Thank you for sharing this very informative video. What he says about boys growing up without their fathers is very sad, but true.

  • @lisap4251
    @lisap4251 2 года назад +3

    People especially women are starting to question all of this. Men are tired of women disrespecting them. Today’s modern feminist are alone with their careers and a pet. So woman need to submit and start respecting men or they die alone

    • @misstdivinechannel
      @misstdivinechannel 2 года назад

      I'm not sure what you mean by "respecting them." I don't think any woman should lower her standards for a man.

    • @stuartcampbell5275
      @stuartcampbell5275 Год назад

      really?

  • @williamwimbourne856
    @williamwimbourne856 2 года назад +68

    Try parenting when you have to work 12hr a day 7 days a week to keep up with the cost of living. Both parents are absent. Children are not allowed out as it's too dangerous.

    • @sandiadamson1754
      @sandiadamson1754 2 года назад +10

      Maybe try and arrange where one of you are home more often and take it in turns. I was a single mum and I regret not being home more often to help my kids through everyday life. I was however a stay home mum in their very early years, only went back to work when we split. I would go back and work half the time and go without some things to do it again. Child raising is THE MOST important job. Not done properly it damages your kids and future citizens.

    • @williamwimbourne856
      @williamwimbourne856 2 года назад

      @@sandiadamson1754 Thank you for your concern and advice. You're spot on.

    • @freemanfreeman5493
      @freemanfreeman5493 2 года назад +13

      I would like to see the numbers of broken families in countries like France, Italy, and some other EU countries. I have worked with people from these countries and their cultural system allows for family time so the corporations cannot infringe on it thereby creating a stronger bond in the family and most of all reduced stress. In the US, you have way more stress, corporations would work you to the bone if they could, and for most companies, zero empathy for you family time. It is all about the worship of money over life whether it be quality of life or stress to death. This is where corporatism, unlimited consumption, worship of money over other attributes of life, and the financialization of the entire economy where everyone is on credit endorsing unlimited consumption beyond your means to pay for it fueled by the banking industry. Hence, the RAT RACE. I used to think that French were lazy but now I see the light as they are trying to keep their culture strong and you do that at the ground level, the family.

    • @aoeu256
      @aoeu256 2 года назад +1

      I heard that outside isn't dangerous compared to say the 1950s and 60s, but everyone thinks its dangerous so even police won't allow it. Its the click-bait media that makes it seem that crime is high.
      Also Steven Pinker has research (twin-studies) that parenting doesn't work long term, two years after children leave home all effect of good or bad parenting goes to zero. From twin-studies he sees that long-term behavior is determined by peers, genes, and self-choices.
      ruclips.net/video/ekI31kzb6iU/видео.html
      ruclips.net/video/6A_6yR00pHA/видео.html

    • @scottwatson4584
      @scottwatson4584 2 года назад +3

      @@aoeu256 Of course parenting works long term. You don’t need false studies to show you that. Who do you go to for advice? What experiences do you look back to? Sure peers and other things can affect decisions but to say parenting does nothing once one has left the nest is pure BS.
      I myself have 4 children and I’ve instituted many of the same rules my parents instilled in me as well as look to see how others are handing things.

  • @truthhurts748
    @truthhurts748 2 года назад +186

    I personally think the “weak” man era started once a lot of the manufacturing jobs were sent overseas. A lot of men never anticipated that the factories that some of their fathers, brothers and uncles worked for and that paid them well and gave them retirement would no longer exist in America. They anticipated their sons having these jobs and the same security. Once the jobs went overseas and the pensions froze many of these men became drug users and alcoholics due to despair and thus becoming abusive or abandoned fathers. The sons of these fathers were left in a hopeless traumatic situation and not sure which path to go which has led to a myriad of problems thus rendering them “weak”.

    • @freemanfreeman5493
      @freemanfreeman5493 2 года назад +22

      Not just weak, angry, resentful of society, and they don’t even know what the politicians and big corporations motivations was… purely a profit motive with no thought about society or the next generation. If they knew that this is what went down, they would be twice as angry. Also, the student loan 3rd party payer system only caused the universities to make up lame degrees and even provide weak STEM degree efforts leaving even the ones who managed to go to college jobless or with financially irrelevant paying jobs. The status quo was “everyone can and should go to college” but now they have lame or not job and a massive student load bill while the banks and universities made out like bandits. We should have pumped student loans equally into vocational schools and propped them up with a massive marketing scheme.

    • @aoeu256
      @aoeu256 2 года назад +3

      A lot of other things happened in the same time though...

    • @JTA1997_
      @JTA1997_ 2 года назад +3

      The "jobs overseas" is caused by a country becoming so economically advanced that it becomes "post industrial". It's just social progress which is unavoidable. Would you rather that we reversed all this, went back in time so people could do mindless labor again? People can either adapt to societal change (which is completely unavoidable) or else.

    • @truthhurts748
      @truthhurts748 2 года назад +14

      @@JTA1997_ The idea that outsourcing jobs overseas for cheap labor as an indicaton of a society becoming economically advanced vs individual gain is a bit questionable . I personally don’t know of any country on planet Earth in this modern age that won’t benefit from human physical labor in any form specifically manufacturing in this case regardless of the high levels of education of the society or Artificial Intelligence. If you or any others do, please let me know. And while I do agree with you that people should adapt to societal change, I prefer to have just a little bit more sympathy considering this nation went from a highly physical to technological society within a decade. And while you may or may not believe in ancient technological societies, modern science has yet to show us the history of humans going through such a change. These humans were also hardworking humans with families and hardly little to no accessibility or capacity of an internet we have today. Those who did adapt put on the suit and tie ventured into sales, IT, corporate management and so forth. But I don’t think it’s fair to expect that kind of adaptation from most human beings so quickly at that time. Yet I don’t blame those who did adapt or the profit makers. It’s kind of an “it is what it is” situation.

    • @JTA1997_
      @JTA1997_ 2 года назад +8

      @@truthhurts748 Capitalism is based on an infinite growth model. This inevitably leads to expansion across borders where labor is less expensive and the countries are less developed. It’s social progress and has to do with market competition

  • @vaquera9368
    @vaquera9368 Год назад +5

    He’s speaking about my life with my children. I filed for the divorce because he was on a dating site and meeting other women. He didn’t want to file for the divorce and told our counselor he didn’t want the kids to blame him for it in the future. But, he surely dated and slept with other women forcing me to file. He is a “Christian” and his parents are Pastors. I had to be the scapegoat. Even with all of that I refused to divorce him and he filed a bifurcation to marry a “Christian” woman he met on a dating site. He was granted the bifurcation the second time around and ended our twenty six year marriage. He hardly saw our youngest son. One year he saw him FOUR times and only for lunch. I would call him to see his son and he would say, “He doesn’t want to see me.” I would tell him to show up and he’ll be ready. He was ready and happy to see his father. I was homeschooling our son so he was available anytime to see his father. I homeschooled all our children. The other three were out of the house by then. It’s been a nightmare since all of it back in 2015 and his divorce to remarry on 2016. Three months after he divorced me he married her. Left the youngest son out of his wedding! Our son didn’t even know he was married until he saw it on Fb. Men met other women and could care less about their kids. That’s been my experience. I took our son to counseling for two years and would drive one way almost one hour for the counselor. I didn’t care. It was about my son. The father never ever helped.

    • @Blackobra614
      @Blackobra614 Год назад

      So because it happened to you, it happens all the time?

  • @artkitectbeats1622
    @artkitectbeats1622 Год назад +31

    Damn dude, you nailed it with this interview. Imagine our society if everyone, not only heard this but put it into practice as well. So many gems in here. I need to rewatch a few more times with a pen and a pad.
    Thank you for this, really.

    • @erinh9267
      @erinh9267 Год назад

      Poor men. Not necessarily weak men. And, the billionaires are causing that. Unions and worker and civil rights protect the poor from the billionaires parasitically leeching off the poor.

  • @ultraautosound905
    @ultraautosound905 2 года назад +476

    Explains why so many horrible laws and legislations are being passed while everyone just goes along with it! Society has lost the warriors that’s protect us.

    • @Dad-979
      @Dad-979 2 года назад +8

      You’re absolutely correct!

    • @kennethflores93
      @kennethflores93 2 года назад +38

      Not really, many are disinvested. This new society is one devoid of the values that made it great and worth sacrificing for.

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 2 года назад +22

      imagine being in your 20s right now. Older generations think your weak and feminine, others calling you stupid for political views, being blamed for spreading virus. On and on. Beating the shit out of men

    • @JakeWitmer
      @JakeWitmer 2 года назад +17

      @@sadhu7191 They can't beat the shit out of a strong, thinking man. ...The truth is that there are no strong, thinking men. If there were, that would be a solution.

    • @ricky4673
      @ricky4673 2 года назад +15

      @@sadhu7191 After your the king of the mountain, you have to push everyone else down. Some of us get up and push back. Sadly, the lesson is hard to learn on our own. We need guidance from our fathers. The top 10 percent don't want new competition so a good father is not needed in their society. (Yes, they think that far ahead)

  • @mensroompodcast
    @mensroompodcast 2 года назад +369

    I love that you brought this man on. He is the most knowledgeable man in his field and has been unjustly shut out by the elites because he dared to question the radical feminist orthodoxy.

    • @jorgeg-moneyrendon1335
      @jorgeg-moneyrendon1335 Год назад +2

      sounds more to me like hes feeding it and promoting it

    • @MyDadCanFixAnything
      @MyDadCanFixAnything Год назад +1

      @@jorgeg-moneyrendon1335 How so?

    • @LotsOfSoap
      @LotsOfSoap Год назад +8

      @@MyDadCanFixAnything2 weeks no response…smh. Great interview nonetheless, the guest is very well educated and made a lot of sense to me

    • @Juide80
      @Juide80 Год назад +3

      I agree with everything here except the claim that he's promoting the radical feminist orthodoxy 👍🙂

    • @wattlebough
      @wattlebough Год назад

      Guy here. Who’s read Jocko Willink’s book Extreme Ownership, or at least knows what it’s main point is? Here’s something I’m not hearing from men anywhere. I’ve worked in heavy industrial workplaces and security for over 20 years with guys from all walks of life, and let me tell you something, there’s a lot of guys out there, a LOT, that are just out to get as many lays as they can, to get as sh!tfaced or wasted as they can and spending their earnings on junk lifestyles, their exhaust system, their subwoofer and the like. This is all a loser mentality from guys of all ages that are completely clueless and have no direction in their lives. You think these kind of guys are going to be good fathers to their kids and good husbands to their girls? Men have the chance to lead the way. The only way they can do that is to become better men. Here’s a hard truth I’ve been seeing for years that you can suck up princesses. The women I’ve known who became blue haired radical feminists were all primed to become that way because all the the significant men in their lives WERE ASSHOLES. The jerk off men in these girls lives treated their daughters and wives like rubbish and then when someone in an educational institution tells these girls that they’re victims of an oppressive patriarchy it’s an easy sale. The men in these girls lives who were dirt bags to them literally drove their daughters in to the arms of the radical feminists. You want to talk about extreme ownership Jocko Willink style, we need to own this. If we want to rescue our sons and daughters we can whine about the injustice of the system towards fathers (it is brutally unjust and evil a lot of the time)? You chose this woman. You chose to sleep with her and ten other easy young skanks who had no self respect to begin with. You think that a girl that’s an easy lay is going to be a decent and faithful partner and mother? You made a bad choice. Maybe it might be a good idea to actually exercise some wisdom and careful judgement before getting your rocks off with the first or tenth girl who says yes on the first or second date. You are responsible for vetting your partner and learning how to vet for a wife. You are responsible for who you get pregnant.
      Then after that when your children are born, YOU are responsible for teaching your sons and daughters how to be decent human beings BY YOUR EXAMPLE. What you do speaks louder to your children than what you say. You treat your partner badly, you neglect her to play video games, you leave her to do all the work, your kids are watching and will either copy you and become a loser or side with their mother and think you’re a loser. Or you can work constantly to improve yourself and become a better man, better husband and better father. Which will it be? Own it gents.

  • @stevenbaumann5911
    @stevenbaumann5911 2 года назад +2

    I really can't buy that argument that a woman who makes more money would love a man that is a stay-at-home husband/father. I heard too many stories of these women cheating on their husbands because they lost respect for him. In cases where it actually does happen that is not the norm. But in some ways I think feminism has done great things for men. One of the things that did is liberated us from expectations. Those expectations are still somewhat there but they are quickly disappearing. I would rather work at a job making less but is more fulfilling then be a corporate slave.

  • @chriswatts2096
    @chriswatts2096 2 года назад +12

    Women leave a man that’s a decent provider and father because family courts make it so easy.
    Thank you for making me pay 13 years child support and 4 years spousal support being unable to afford the house any longer.
    20% of gross income before taxes for 13 years.
    Not being with my son has haunted me.

  • @Bm23CC
    @Bm23CC 2 года назад +42

    "The fixing of the problem is listening to the problem". That is powerful advice there.

  • @judah6152
    @judah6152 2 года назад +469

    This has been done purposely for destabilizing.

    • @africkinamerican
      @africkinamerican 2 года назад +4

      @@marymckinney4472 that would be even better with paragraph spacing!

    • @marymckinney4472
      @marymckinney4472 2 года назад +7

      @@africkinamerican Sweetheart be thankful it's readable at all. I had to bypass the algorithm to get it to stay up.

    • @Dsworddance22
      @Dsworddance22 2 года назад

      @@marymckinney4472 You're delusional. The vaccines are safe and effective.

    • @SkyraXD
      @SkyraXD 2 года назад +2

      Yup in real time you see it

    • @bettermanchannel770
      @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +17

      Yes sir. The communism agenda, among others. Cannot defeat us through war, so they deconstruct identity, Family units and create chaos

  • @abdulhalimalhiraki4735
    @abdulhalimalhiraki4735 Год назад +1

    Thank you very much for hosting Dr. Farell...lots of wisdom right here 🙏🏼

  • @leafy877
    @leafy877 Год назад +6

    Great video ! I am raising three boys without their dad around. They need the discipline that I trying to figure out how to provide that since he cannot be around, he made terrible choices and is in jail. He never thought of the consequences to his family. It hurts my heart that we have to deal with the outcome.

  • @investornabil8825
    @investornabil8825 2 года назад +413

    First time I hear someone talk about gender issues who actually understands whats going on. Accurate understanding of both sides.

    • @pastexpiry2013B
      @pastexpiry2013B 2 года назад +5

      That's what happens when you are inundated by feminist rhetoric.

    • @antalpoti
      @antalpoti 2 года назад +3

      Listen to this guy. He is approaching the issue from multiple. It's incredible how many ways there exist in which men have it harder.

    • @Gaonaism
      @Gaonaism 2 года назад +8

      Dr. Jordan Peterson speaks about gender issues extensively.

    • @standinginthegap7118
      @standinginthegap7118 2 года назад

      I agree

    • @stunna1050
      @stunna1050 2 года назад +1

      The Fresh & Fit podcast often repeat these exact sentiments that Dr. Warren is speaking about. A lot of the supportive male related shows and podcasts are. Donovan Sharpe, Kevin Samuels, The Roommates, Fresh and Fit etc.

  • @busterhoodstar4447
    @busterhoodstar4447 2 года назад +174

    Boys and Girls need their Fathers and Mothers in their lives. Boys and Girls don't just need any Father. They both need a GOOD man as a Father. They both need a GOOD woman as a Mother. They both need to play traditional roles in the family.

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +5

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

    • @EveningTV
      @EveningTV 2 года назад +8

      yes, and a bad role model is worse than not having a father at all (or mother). My sons would have been infinitely better off if their dad just abandoned us rather than spending their entire childhoods causing chaos and conflict and complex trauma. One of my sons has low self esteem and is often in imbalanced and abusive relationships. My other son died at 20 from an accidental overdose. Both of them were diagnosed with "relatively severe Complex PTSD" due to the abuse they endured with a father diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder and a vey self absorbed and dysfunctional extended family. I'm sure that I made some mistakes in how to deal with all of the problems, but it was real and I couldn't change that or protect them or myself. No one is having an amicable divorce with a sociopath.

    • @akyna369
      @akyna369 2 года назад +1

      And Faith

    • @ggrthemostgodless8713
      @ggrthemostgodless8713 2 года назад

      @@akyna369
      ??

    • @francobola9920
      @francobola9920 2 года назад +4

      To piggy back , don't have children just to have a trophy you give part of your life,

  • @andyjm7122
    @andyjm7122 Год назад +3

    Thank you Patrick for bringing this huge issue to light and having this author on. I can relate to so much of it as the son of a father who was barely involved and taught me nothing.

  • @marcusavila2961
    @marcusavila2961 2 года назад +10

    This man has a LOT of real knowledge. Great interviewee!

  • @landofthefree2023
    @landofthefree2023 2 года назад +84

    This man really knows his business.
    A well crafted commentary, shooting straight from direct thought. Very impressive skill set.

  • @bettermanchannel770
    @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +270

    We need strong masculine men with identity to raise boys so that those boys in return become strong sharp men. Life requires masculinity. Strong cultures will fail without strong solid identities

    • @giannagiavelli5098
      @giannagiavelli5098 2 года назад +12

      except you are living in a gynocracy where women divorce rape men and family formation is impossible. wake up.

    • @bettermanchannel770
      @bettermanchannel770 2 года назад +13

      @@giannagiavelli5098 men don't reject life, they dominate, to make excuses is a feminine quality, I woke up and choose to dominate life not pity it, best wishes

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 2 года назад +8

      We have world population of 8 billion. Whats the end goal? 3 colonized planets? Are we playing a numbers game like rats? What is this animal instinct in us to reproduce mindlessly

    • @truthsocialmedia
      @truthsocialmedia 2 года назад

      ​@@sadhu7191 5-10 million years with known laws of physics to populate the galaxy. once the goal is accomplished, squid games.

    • @giannagiavelli5098
      @giannagiavelli5098 2 года назад +4

      @@sadhu7191 whites do not reproduce in captivity

  • @loisdanes176
    @loisdanes176 Год назад +26

    After having a couple of teenagers that I made too many deals with when they were little I'm so thankful for my husband and his consistency and strength.

    • @steveunderhill5935
      @steveunderhill5935 Год назад +1

      Good cop/bad cop. Make some rules you can all live with and stick too them. Switch roles regularly to keep the kids guessing. Lol Jeckyl and Hyde.

    • @steveunderhill5935
      @steveunderhill5935 Год назад

      Any other strategies? I won’t have teenagers for a few years…

  • @rubyb7252
    @rubyb7252 Год назад +73

    this is fascinating to me. As a Mexican American, although I'm born and raised in the US, I thought I knew the American culture... until I started dating my now American husband. And I started to really see the cultural attitudes and differences. I started seeing the effects of different relationship dynamics. The differences between going from divorced parents, being raised by a single mother for a time and I've actually heard my husband state the fear of becoming that father that was spoken negatively of by his mother, being parentified by his mother, to parents who stayed together for the security of the family, to a traditional, gender roles, and slight misogyny that's quite present in the Hispanic world, to the more "yielding" type of American men because of the assertiveness of American women because of different movements that have occurred... and finding that as a woman you do have a voice compared to the submission that's expected in Hispanic households.
    I've been fortunate that my father, although outdated in some views, he raised me to be independent, to provide for myself, to have a work ethic that has been vocally appreciated in my places of work, yet from his own struggles with depression could recognize such behaviors and have a bit more empathy than might be typically expressed and therefore can be more understanding toward my husband and the male experience (which I'm barely scratching the surface of)...
    not really going anywhere with this haha 😅 the deranged musings of a Mexican American in her 20s😅
    all and all great video

    • @luisvillarreal4743
      @luisvillarreal4743 Год назад +10

      Naw no derangement, your brainstorming, I do the same. I'm also a mexican American and it's a ever evolving complicated world for our generation in general. Peace ✌️

    • @juniorsanchez7441
      @juniorsanchez7441 Год назад

      Are u fat yet? Cuz im Mexican-American as well n damn finding one thats skinny is like a needle in a haystack lol

    • @rubyb7252
      @rubyb7252 Год назад +1

      @@juniorsanchez7441 my metabolism is still on my side lol yeah 😆😝

    • @juniorsanchez7441
      @juniorsanchez7441 Год назад +3

      @@rubyb7252 Lol good cuz these damn Christmas tamales be killing me. Came back to work my uniforms tight asf🤣. Fr tho abt ur comment, it really is a culture shock to see how different relationships are here and also how corrupted couples get that come from Mexico together how living here they both change for what seems for the worst in many instances

    • @lickalotlickalot2210
      @lickalotlickalot2210 Год назад +4

      Saying you did not have a voice in your own original country is a fallacy! In Latin countries women have voices just the role is different! Men work under the sun and rain all day and don't want to come home to you talking over them! When life is harder at Latin countries women care about more basic things like the health and well being of the kids and husbands. What you call having a voice is having entitlement! But I don't doubt that when you start living in America you would change into that!

  • @divineimagedance
    @divineimagedance 2 года назад +261

    Very well done video. The video is so well done that I am calling my son's dad right now to tell him what a good job he's doing.

    • @freshness_ah7534
      @freshness_ah7534 2 года назад +10

      And go back to him if he takes you back feminist!

    • @ATD909
      @ATD909 2 года назад +4

      Bless your heart 👍🏾

    • @errickmcadams7931
      @errickmcadams7931 2 года назад +12

      That call meant everything to that dad.

    • @vonlivebillionaire8674
      @vonlivebillionaire8674 2 года назад +2

      It took this video to make that call 📞

    • @BlackberryTitties
      @BlackberryTitties 2 года назад +17

      @@freshness_ah7534 Being called a Feminist is not an insult you know! Being a feminist means putting your needs as a woman FIRST before a crusty mans feelings!! There is more to life than a man! 😭😭
      Y'alls big egos get the best of you!

  • @davidedgerly
    @davidedgerly 2 года назад +163

    I worked in the childcare industry here in Ma. And he's spot on when he's speaking to the state has become the substitute husband... A better part of 90% of all kids in my care came from single mother family...

    • @katashi222
      @katashi222 2 года назад +9

      Sad fact!!!!

    • @narcslayer425
      @narcslayer425 2 года назад +33

      Fatherless homes tend to produce weak men. Sad.

    • @sobc2737
      @sobc2737 2 года назад +17

      Single mother family...what a contradiction.

    • @em4227
      @em4227 2 года назад +3

      Sad

    • @em4227
      @em4227 2 года назад +20

      @@narcslayer425 well said only a man can really teach a boy how to be a man

  • @siddharthkrishna7249
    @siddharthkrishna7249 10 дней назад

    The older generations make fun of us for not having backbone and not being able to stand up for ourselves but that is because we were not allowed to stand up for ourselves. When we stand up to the bully, we get punished.

  • @KerryFairbanks
    @KerryFairbanks Год назад +1

    Last night a little girl came up to me while I was tossing out trash in my apartment area. I know she lives in a unit near there. Anyway she starts talking and asks my name and says "I'm waiting for one of my papa's friends and it's boring. Would you hang out with me?" I told her yes and asked where is her papa? She said he is inside. So she keeps talking but I look over to see the front door open to their apartment. She starts saying things like "Papa told me if I'm in trouble and I can't use a phone to yell as loud as I can." This caught me of guard, then she says would you mind waiting 10-15 minutes incase I have to yell? I said yes of course but at this same time her father stepped out the door and called her name. She ran over to him and I just gave him a big friendly wave since I'm a strange man talking to his 8yo daughter essentially. I walked back to my place but I can't stop thinking about this girl. Why is she waiting for her dad's friend? Why did she start talking about what to do if she's in danger? I've seen them around and he seems like a normal guy. I don't have any kids and this situation made me understand how parents feel toward their children. I want to make sure this girl is ok but maybe I'm thinking too much about it. Glad to be a man in the world. The world needs men.

    • @kovarcoley8418
      @kovarcoley8418 7 месяцев назад

      This sounds weird maybe you should talk to the dad and if anything is off talk to the police.

  • @DemetriPanici
    @DemetriPanici 2 года назад +102

    *“Everything that happens is either endurable or not. If it’s endurable, then endure it. Stop complaining." - Marcus Aurelius*

    • @ChristaFree
      @ChristaFree 2 года назад +9

      No. If it's stupid, don't endure anything.

    • @ghostingwhileblack
      @ghostingwhileblack 2 года назад +3

      @Andres Emilio DiStefano He's just another spammer promoting his channel by commenting as soon as a video is uploaded. I hope the majority of those 23 thumbs up were bots and not real people because these quotes are just dumb.

    • @janiterinadrum1627
      @janiterinadrum1627 2 года назад +1

      Isn't the cancelculture totalitarianism?
      By definition

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +1

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

  • @carriesilvinaespinozavilla5177
    @carriesilvinaespinozavilla5177 2 года назад +102

    I am 64. I absolutely agree with everything in this video. Welfare USED to be called AID TO FAMILIES WITH DEPENDENT CHILDREN. When I was in my teens the law changed where underage WOMEN could get welfare if they had no spouse. Suddenly young unprepared pregnant women had the government as their spouse. The young underage women were then given a tool to enable them to avoid any input from the family, additionally many families were relieved to have the underage pregnant female have an income. Previous to this change in welfare the pregnant girls family would have been in contact with the FATHERS family and there would have been a push for the pregnant woman and soon-to-be-father to form a family in the benefit of the CHILDREN. NO ONE benefits when they are not required to be accountable. Then in this situation the woman raises children WITHOUT A FATHER. Fathers are ESSENTIAL. How do I know this? I WAS THE FIRST GENERATION IN MY FAMILY TO BE ON WELFARE. I raised my kids without a father. Then my daughter went down the same route. Then my ONLY GRANDDAUGHTER bore the unhealthy damage of no fathers for two generations. My granddaughter was outrageously beautiful, had a voice like an angel, loved GOD, and carried a SOUL PAIN that made her vulnerable. Did a predator find her? Yes. She was killed in her bedroom last weekend because it just so happened for the first time in months the house was entirely empty of family. She was my ONLY GRANDCHILD, my bloodline ends with her. I have been studying my family and the generations. I am an ethicist, statician, and I am willing to lay down my life for my family. But the single mistake of my family , which is packed with engineers, artists, and passionate people; is the fact that society had put too much of focus on money as a solution. The solution is NOT to throw money at situations, the solution for the family is to form a united front requiring responsibility, accountability, through a commitment to honest sincere communication. The skill of CLEAR OPEN HONEST RESPECTFULL COMMUNICATION is NOT a priority in families, schools or colleges. How do I know this? I have worked in the Counseling Department of a California College for 20 years. I have worked with thousands of families. I have observed the terrible destruction of family structures leading to complete dysfunction. The dysfunction of young men has been heartbreaking. Males are suffering far more than females. It is absolutely true that the percentage of adult male faculty is much lower than female faculty. Females dominate the Educational fields. I believe without a doubt one of the largest influences that has led to so many MALES wanting to be transgendered to FEMALES is because they RECOGNIZE the power dominance of women. I see an entire generation of young men taking on traditional female attributes exhibited through a range of behaviors. Some males become submissive, may drift into wearing makeup, hang around females to emulate them. Some go all the way to have extensive plastic surgery and hormone replacement. Yes there are females who do not want to be females, why? Look at the family. If the lack of communication causes strife and the power lands with the male examples then the young female children will emulate the powerful adult males. Males and females alike who are so dissatisfied with their own gender that they reject their gender ALWAYS have influential family members they have been imprinted by. How do I know this? Again experience. My mother was an example of a beautiful disturbed person who was very self centered. I decided at a very young age the last thing I wanted to be was a woman. Thank God I wasnt a young teen in todays society or I would have been pushed into being transgendered. I matured and am very happy being a woman. I eventually married a highly educated man who was a Biologist PhD from England. Martin Bernard Halliday, he taught me how to COMMUNICATE. Unfortunately he died after 13 years of marriage and this loss crippled our family. My husband was the Man's Man. Not perfect but a true leader. As for me? Martin would tell me , " You have more balls than most guys" . Our marriage was studied by Carol Kruger, a writer for So. Ca. Newspapers on families. She said our marriage was one of the few she had ever seen that were equally power balanced. We had the best possible marriage because we worked hard at honest communication. We put commitment first, integrity, honor, respect.

    • @jsenyomo
      @jsenyomo 2 года назад +6

      Quite a gripping story!

    • @guitar12ish
      @guitar12ish 2 года назад +14

      So sorry for your loss. Appreciate your insight and take on this subject .

    • @candymuncher8155
      @candymuncher8155 2 года назад +18

      Wow...you should write a book. You have the experience and some solid observations and opinions that need to be fleshed out.

    • @litaknowes7294
      @litaknowes7294 2 года назад +4

      Excellent ..TY

    • @litaknowes7294
      @litaknowes7294 2 года назад +3

      @@candymuncher8155 excellent TY

  • @minaso81307
    @minaso81307 Год назад

    This must not apply to everyone. My father is Mexican and my mother is Guatemalan. They fought for my custody when I was in high school. IN NEW JERSEY. At the time, he was in the country illegally while my mother was an American citizen. He had no money while my mother had a paid attorney to represent her. But she was a HORRIBLE mother and thus the judge left it up to ME to decide who I would live with. My father got custody of me. No one spent a quarter of a million dollars either. I'm 32 years old BTW.

  • @lennyclark1998
    @lennyclark1998 10 месяцев назад

    This guy is explaining so much. Everyone needs to hear him. I’m going to save this and listen to it often.

  • @tikiron4807
    @tikiron4807 2 года назад +81

    excellent interview. the author nailed it. i especially liked, "the Achilles heel...is the inability to handle criticism without becoming defensive"-wow. powerful stuff. so true too.

    • @joblakelisbon
      @joblakelisbon 2 года назад +8

      I've always had trouble handling criticism. It's not that I don't want to improve - it's that I'm already at maximum most of the time. I literally give 100% in everything I do. If I get criticised, I feel like I don't have anything else to give so I basically hear that 'your best isn't good enough.'

    • @eddenoy321
      @eddenoy321 2 года назад +5

      @@joblakelisbon That's corporate leaders squeezing you for the shareholders. Be strong , work steady and pace yourself. Health is always #1.

    • @mikecastelluccio7072
      @mikecastelluccio7072 Год назад +3

      @@joblakelisbon think of criticism as a means of better utilizing that effort that you are expending. Or more succinctly…without that criticism, you may be stagnant thus inhibiting your growth. Make sense?

    • @WhiteWolfos
      @WhiteWolfos Год назад

      @@joblakelisbon even if you give it 110% criticism is for your advantage and future growth. There's also good and bad criticism. A person I knew kept telling me to stop criticizing him to do this or that, but from my window it's because I see more potential that he can one day reach and I know he can, even if now it seems like he can't.

    • @hallowakers3d2y
      @hallowakers3d2y Год назад

      @@WhiteWolfosmen dont need anymore criticism they have haad that long enough. They need encouragement

  • @gardnert1
    @gardnert1 2 года назад +136

    My dad destroyed our family by being a workaholic and alcoholic. My childhood was a nightmare and I feel completely disconnected with them. My greatest desire is to give my kids a positive family life, and I'm more than willing to sacrifice financial success or even stability to get it. I'd rather be poor together than rich and disconnected.

    • @billyaiello9022
      @billyaiello9022 2 года назад +48

      Do not be poor “for your kids.” They would rather have you around less than struggle their entire adolescence. Everything in moderation is my thought.

    • @renebleu8711
      @renebleu8711 2 года назад +6

      @@billyaiello9022 agreed

    • @Yomi4D
      @Yomi4D 2 года назад +16

      Don't be poor. That might push them to the streets.

    • @conversationleadership
      @conversationleadership 2 года назад +27

      Don’t be poor man. My Dad was always present… but could never hold on to a job. To this day, I lack proper respect for him and have struggled my entire life trying to figure out what it means to be a man. A present Dad does not necessarily make a good Dad. I would have preferred he provided well for the family and modeled manhood properly.
      Some food for thought.

    • @Nick_Taylor.
      @Nick_Taylor. 2 года назад +11

      The fact that you're interested in doing a complete 180 from what happened to you says that you have a lot of trauma with this. Best to get that cleared up asap so it doesn't negatively imprint the kids and ruin the marriage.

  • @tamasajtony9855
    @tamasajtony9855 Год назад +1

    Good life creates soft people. Soft people create difficult life. Difficult life creates strong people. Strong people create good life...

  • @katlehokomeke
    @katlehokomeke Год назад +2

    One of the best interviews I have ever heard.

  • @chelstonthomas1127
    @chelstonthomas1127 2 года назад +180

    A gigantic social experiment, these people will never stop.

    • @mmr6825
      @mmr6825 2 года назад +18

      Totally on point and I am a woman that sees that

    • @girumzemichael704
      @girumzemichael704 2 года назад +7

      Nor will we, fighting back. A mother.

    • @jsedge2473
      @jsedge2473 2 года назад +6

      Yep. And I can't see the experiment ending well if continually pushed in this direction.

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +3

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

  • @Astrocade1981
    @Astrocade1981 2 года назад +91

    This is the exact situation my brother's and I grew up in.
    My parents split back in 85.
    I've struggled exactly the way this man describes.

  • @andrewahall
    @andrewahall Год назад +2

    This should’ve been 2 hrs long. SO good and SO much more this guy can share. But great interview Pat

  • @user-lb7bs1xh6i
    @user-lb7bs1xh6i Год назад +1

    If man show any sign of strengh and fight for appropriate place in society, he will be thrown to jail or killed.
    Society needs obedient men. Who will work to death, pay taxes and child care.

  • @mmr6825
    @mmr6825 2 года назад +115

    I am a woman and if you see even in "Game of thrones" the man died and woman take the power. It's an universal message that is present in every aspect of daily life. At home, at work, in the movies. It's outrageous.

    • @markheselden438
      @markheselden438 2 года назад +7

      excellent observaton..its alos true in every sitcom and commercial. Men are weak, like Republicans...I don't have any answers.

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +7

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

    • @alexandrafreed4172
      @alexandrafreed4172 2 года назад +13

      I hate it, i want a man and family ☹

    • @Yumicpcake
      @Yumicpcake 2 года назад +3

      I don't watch that garbage. You like 50 shades too?

    • @wyleecoyotee4252
      @wyleecoyotee4252 2 года назад +3

      @@alexandrafreed4172
      Get an education and a career

  • @JohnSmith-fx4se
    @JohnSmith-fx4se 2 года назад +88

    This man has amazing eye contact.

    • @zackscott8636
      @zackscott8636 2 года назад +9

      he looks miserable and monotonous like he’s a puppet on a leash

    • @roddydykes7053
      @roddydykes7053 2 года назад +19

      @@zackscott8636 like anyone who’s spent a great deal of their life in the feminist movement would. However his message is still very important, in case you didn’t notice

    • @michaelweber5702
      @michaelweber5702 2 года назад +2

      @@zackscott8636 , he doesn't look that way to me ...

    • @kubasniak
      @kubasniak 2 года назад +2

      @@zackscott8636 and you're pessimistic, unessesarily quarrelsome and critical. Probably a narcissist who can't understand the points he spoke of and invalidating male issues. You don't add anything productive nor positive to the discussion. Begone.

    • @donaldbush1182
      @donaldbush1182 2 года назад +3

      He looks insane!

  • @SeraphimDragon
    @SeraphimDragon Год назад

    "Fix the problem by not fixing the problem."
    Part of the reason men want to fix a problem is because we don't have the time, patience, or energy, to keep hearing or dealing about the same problem. If doing nothing but keeping your mouth shut is the best "solution" then I am flat out telling the women AND this guy, you're dead wrong and the relationship will be dead before too long because when a tire is flat, it needs to be fixed. When our kid is being bullied, the bully needs to be corrected. Inaction is the WORST advice anyone could possibly give, period.

  • @azucenabech9250
    @azucenabech9250 2 года назад +117

    I had my daughter and I thought how could a boy top this off. I had my boy 17 months later and at around 4 years old when I was napping and exhausted he comes in with a little plastic box that I got him for insects w at least 3 bees. And I was in awe how he had safely at that age accomplished a task w out fear or instruction. He later showed me that he had used a flower to lure the bees in. That boy awesomeness is still there but now twice as much. And my daughter of course doesn't skip a beat but in her own awesome feminine self!

    • @maplesyrup1805
      @maplesyrup1805 2 года назад +11

      Yep I’ve seen the magic of children as well. Both daughter and son.

    • @KateBates22zabu
      @KateBates22zabu 2 года назад +11

      I have two adult daughters and always yearned for a boy baby. Widowed at 27yo and never wanted to remarry bc I felt I'd be giving control away & didn't want my girls to deal with a stepfather.

    • @KD400_
      @KD400_ Год назад +1

      My bro idk if ur a guy or not they need more masculinity from u

    • @577jrock
      @577jrock Год назад

      God blessed you!

  • @garysuarez9614
    @garysuarez9614 2 года назад +69

    "Tell a boy enough times in his formative years that he is unwanted and he will prove you right as a man."
    - me

    • @MM-fb9fi
      @MM-fb9fi Год назад +9

      Those poor little boys will never amount to a thing because they don't have a father. People stood around my brother and I and spoke as if we were furniture and could hear nothing. Even at a young age I knew they could not predict our future and it only strengthened our resolve. We did succeed and have lived well. I often wonder how well their children fared.

    • @Kay.in.FL.HI.SA.JP.OZ.NZ.RIO..
      @Kay.in.FL.HI.SA.JP.OZ.NZ.RIO.. Год назад

      We were shown that daily and told that often... and we all proved them wrong!

    • @nervamerc
      @nervamerc Год назад +3

      Good quote Gary Suarez. We can be, by our parents, straightforwardly told that. Also, we can be shown that through their disgusting actions. I am TOTALLY estranged from my dad

    • @teresitaramirez9628
      @teresitaramirez9628 Год назад +2

      May you find peace and erase those words from your being. Replace them with beautiful words like “you are a child of God and you are loved by everyone” ❤

    • @wallybingbang4350
      @wallybingbang4350 Год назад

      ADHD
      Absent Dad Hyperactivity Disorder

  • @lyledavis7175
    @lyledavis7175 Год назад +2

    The last five minutes are golden and explains so much of the relationship issues today.

  • @Cantbuyathrill
    @Cantbuyathrill 2 года назад +1

    And that is the crux and pit of the matter,:
    A WOMAN WHO DOESN'T RESPECT HER MAN CANNOT POSSIBLE LOVE THAT MAN.

  • @TruthSeeker_7
    @TruthSeeker_7 2 года назад +79

    This is one of the most important interviews for parents with boys that I have seen. Excellent!

    • @TruthSeeker_7
      @TruthSeeker_7 2 года назад

      @Neal DoubleAA
      And what is your explanation of the current state of boys?

    • @MarcoMayorgaRacing
      @MarcoMayorgaRacing 2 года назад +1

      Yes agreed fantastic book has helped me alot to understand life

    • @candymuncher8155
      @candymuncher8155 2 года назад +1

      You should read the book.

  • @libertysprings2244
    @libertysprings2244 2 года назад +20

    There is no way to have this conversation without accidentally offending someone, but it is a conversation I am so glad is being had and that you are both willing to take those risks to bring them to more widespread attention like the subject deserves.

    • @alicia_nicole
      @alicia_nicole Год назад

      True. As a single mother, i am slightly offended. Still trying to find all these financial resources available to us.

  • @michaeld42
    @michaeld42 Год назад +1

    The most important thing missed is the absence of a relationship with their Heavenly Father.

  • @thefraug3827
    @thefraug3827 2 года назад +136

    It seems Jordan Peterson has been able to help a lot of young men. He may be worth a listen to anyone, young or old, struggling or not, man or woman. Just I have seen men seriously humbled by him in a good way that they could come into their own and soar. The best man I know introduced me to him.

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +5

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

    • @marylarneyrn1854
      @marylarneyrn1854 2 года назад +3

      Love Jordan Pederson. He’s amazing. He’s taught me a lot too.

    • @j.d.youtube6557
      @j.d.youtube6557 Год назад +1

      Jordan is overly emotional camera junkie and cries all the time. Hard to take him seriously

  • @davidpriddy20
    @davidpriddy20 2 года назад +154

    This is by far one of the best videos you’ve ever posted on this platform. If we want to see this world change we have to raise children better. Quit having kids out of wedlock.

    • @freemanfreeman5493
      @freemanfreeman5493 2 года назад +24

      Or better, be a man and take care of that kid. Learn what it is to COACH a child into success.

    • @Navs126
      @Navs126 2 года назад +11

      Plenty people married raising crappy people.

    • @joedonzi9552
      @joedonzi9552 2 года назад +2

      I joined the Boy Scouts in1962 and learned how to become a MAN - then the ACLU and the ADL sued the Boy Scouts and Bankrupted them. A severe loss for American Youth !

    • @bobbyosborne2375
      @bobbyosborne2375 2 года назад +6

      Women are not marriage material at all in the west.

    • @hkkraus1644
      @hkkraus1644 2 года назад +4

      No, marriage has nothing to do with it. Just 2 parents abusing you instead of 1.

  • @erenjeager9442
    @erenjeager9442 Год назад +2

    I quit playing videogames at age of 25, still struggling with porn, and i did have a father, but he's wasn't strong male role, only acted like a bets male.
    My father acted like he's in high schooler, left me, my brother and me, to another woman, after the women daughter false accused my dad for a crime he didn't committed, and went to prison.
    I was weak, but still learn of how to become Masculine.

  • @MyDadCanFixAnything
    @MyDadCanFixAnything Год назад +3

    I believe he's 100% correct in his statement that men shouldn't strive to solve their women's problems. Just let them be heard. Really heard (which involves asking questions afterwards) so they know you've really been listening. Well done sir. I've been married for 15 years and this has always been the case for me. I know it's tough. As men, we want to solve the problem. We NEED to, but women don't operate the same as us. Good advice from Dr. Farrell.

    • @africkinamerican
      @africkinamerican Год назад +2

      1) It's a complete fallacy that solving problems somehow equals lacking compassion. That's absurd, when you think about it. You want to solve the problem because you have compassion.
      Also, if he understands that we *need* to solve it, then we *should* solve it. Shouldn't be incumbent upon women to understand that and shouldn't psychologist be explaining that to them, rather than constantly telling men to shut up and not offer help?
      If I can help, then I will help. If you don't want help, don't cry about it to me.

  • @cobrathecobra3398
    @cobrathecobra3398 2 года назад +27

    "I've been wronged." -The phrase everybody seems to focusing on, trying to figure out how they've been mistreated.

    • @Hoops590
      @Hoops590 2 года назад +3

      That sounds exhausting

  • @UsernamerAlreadyTakn
    @UsernamerAlreadyTakn 2 года назад +61

    As an adult I wish I was raised by my dad instead of my mom for all the reasons this man spoke of.
    A woman can not raise a man.

    • @juliachildress2943
      @juliachildress2943 2 года назад +24

      Who do you think raised all of the boys whose fathers were lost in 2 world wars and Vietnam? Children generally do best with two parents, but widowed mothers have always had to step up. If such sons have grandfathers, uncles, teachers, scout leaders, and coaches in their lives in addition to their mothers, they can thrive.

    • @Mk-il3zq
      @Mk-il3zq 2 года назад +13

      And yet I'm doing it.
      My son is an excellent marksman because of ME!
      My son is respectful to all because of ME!
      My son has food on the table because of ME!
      My son has clothes on his back because of ME!
      My son can throw a football, read, do his laundry, balance a checkbook......hell I can go on.
      Because of ME. A mere female. If you see his dad....tell him his son is doing just fine.

    • @pm8401
      @pm8401 2 года назад +4

      So why didn't your father step up?

    • @Chef.91
      @Chef.91 2 года назад +3

      @@pm8401 😂 he wasn’t man enough

    • @donnathedead7554
      @donnathedead7554 2 года назад +4

      ...if she keeps him isolated from all positive male role models rather than seek them out like any decent single mother of a male would do. There, I finished it for you so it makes sense now. I'm sorry your mother was some kind of idiot. You're going to have to grow yourself up now and develop the maturity to realize that one person, no matter how pivotal to you personally, does not represent all other members of a group they belong to.

  • @builderpj
    @builderpj Год назад +2

    I'm 41. Getting ready to live in my truck. Love this life!

  • @LVL50DarkElf
    @LVL50DarkElf Год назад

    I think what defines a man. Is someone who defends those who can’t defend themself. Someone who takes care of the ones who can’t speak for themself. Not a beard. How many women you get or how much money you have. It’s about
    morality.

  • @thankful5832
    @thankful5832 2 года назад +14

    As the head of the house and a male, I feel it is my responsibility to be flexible to my wife’s adjusting desires. I sacrifice my budding business career so that my wife can also work in the field she loves. I honestly didn’t love my career but enjoyed the fruits of it. One fruit was it allowed my wife to stay home, gain education, while being the prominent caregiver to our children - we are now taking steps to start our own clinic where I will be able to utilize my business skills and she her unique caregiving skills together. Thank God He opened my eyes and appreciate our complete differences so that we may serve our community in a way we couldn’t otherwise.

    • @thankful5832
      @thankful5832 2 года назад +4

      Btw when I say, head of house - I look at it more like leading a dance not leading a country via dictatorship lol

    • @thankful5832
      @thankful5832 2 года назад

      Haha at the gym currently. Well done 👍

  • @dianejackson2736
    @dianejackson2736 2 года назад +25

    I was concerned at first how this interview would go, but this was terrific!! PBD asked all the right questions. Thanks, as always, for providing great content that makes a difference!

  • @tchristopoulos518
    @tchristopoulos518 Год назад +2

    Interesting. Initially, my wife did not want a child. Then, one day, out of the blue, she wanted to have a child. 9 months later, Angela was born. At the same time, I left corporate America and started our sub-S corporation. It seems that when you run your own business, roles are more clearly defined. One can argue that the corporation forces couples to own these definitions My role was to steer the company. I ran the day-to-day operations and my wife's role was to support that endeavor. She took care of our little miracle, home-cooked meals (she has 2 degrees, 1 Nutrition and 2 Nursing), washed clothes, cleaned the house...pretty much ran the "household". She also was the bookkeeper of our corporation. Again, it seems that owning/running your own business demands roles to be more clearly defined, which makes life "easier". After Angela got a bit older, my wife got a job as an RN at a hospital almost walking distance from our home. Then, we sold the business and I took a job in China (long commute...lol). Those once clearly defined roles stopped and 3 years later, we divorced. My role, as the main source of income for the family, did not stop. Alimony / Child Support was the best money I spent every month. It seems to me that when the role of the Female and Male are more clearly defined, life is simplified and there is more harmony. Cheers 🍻 btw Valuetainment (not sure if I spelled that right) is a top-notched POD. Congrats on a job well done.

    • @XavierHernan712
      @XavierHernan712 Год назад

      Do you think this might just be in America or the West, because usually third world countries are more based off survival rather cooperate.

  • @aaronhartwig1984
    @aaronhartwig1984 Год назад +1

    Not “social bribes”, necessary roles for the good of humanity. Not a lot of men giving birth to the next generation.

  • @juanitamora4857
    @juanitamora4857 2 года назад +19

    Teach the young people to get to know their partner before marriage , make sure thats the person is what you want as a partner. The big amount of depression and suicide in the country is a sign of weakness and the early home environment, lack of emotional support because of the broken family structure etc. When you're brought up with strong character, moral, ethics, emotional support and love and faith youxan withstand the bad periods of life.

  • @bluesun2001
    @bluesun2001 2 года назад +9

    This is brilliant! Thank you for not interrupting the guest, Pat!

  • @NikiLivi5
    @NikiLivi5 Год назад +8

    This does effect some of the girls too. I was a tomboy and wanted so bad to be a daddy’s girl. I did everything I could to make him love me. When he & my mom divorced and he traded me off for my psycho stepmom, my same age stepsister who was the perfect straight A cheerleader and my stepbrother I knew he didn’t love me even though I’d tried so hard to make him happy. I hated hanging out with the girls and doing girl stuff until around age 15. But I still mostly had guy friends. I hated staying inside baking etc. Guys stayed outside more and were just way more fun! Plus guys didn’t get into all the girl drama or gossiping. But I felt so betrayed by my dad. Until my stepdad showed me what a real dad was like. The way he looked at his girls I knew he would do anything to make sure they were happy and safe. Because they were older than me they didn’t visit a whole lot which gave me a lot of time with him. He loved me for me. He never tried to change me and wasn’t embarrassed by my accent like my sperm donor was. I have a thick southern accent that some of us on my moms moms side seem to have. There are a few of us that sound just alike. Being raised a in another state and an hour and a half away from them idk how I ended up talking just like them. Neither of my parents or my real sister talk that way. I guess I was just lucky. Anyway, he never tried to change me. Since he was a veterinarian he took off at 12pm every Wednesday and Saturday. Wednesdays were our fishing days. We lived on a lake so he & I fished every Wednesday from around 1 till dark. We would sit and talk about anything and everything. He listened a lot. I had so much going on since my parents divorced when I was 14 and my sperm donor was remarried in 6 months. He & my mom were just dating at that time but it wasn’t long till he asked for my approval on wether or not he could live with us. My mom had asked him but he wanted my approval first. And of course I said yes. He also had a little MG convertible that was a 4 speed. We spent countless hours riding while he taught me to drive a straight stick. As long as I did good in school he’d let me take the MG out on the weekends. I loved that little car. That man was there for me when my real dad wasn’t anywhere to be found. Because my stepsister graduated the same date as I did and both were in the evening my sperm donor didn’t come to my high school graduation but went to hers. He told me he didn’t come to mine because on the invitation I only put his name and didn’t invite my stepmom. What BS! I guess it was a good thing because when they announced my parents it was Dr. & Mrs. Kirk. No mention of my real dad. I even filled out all of my school paperwork with his name under dad. My principal came to me because we don’t have the same last names and nicely and gently asked for school records and in case we get audited who is your dad? I stated my stepdads name. He smiled and said yeah but your real dad? Again, I said my stepdads name. He grinned and said you know what I’m getting at. Just in case who is your dad? I grinned really big also and told him the only dad I have is my stepdads name. He closed my file and said ok then. Then that’s who it is! He never asked me again. My stepdad was there for everything! He even walked me down the aisle when I got married and my donor never showed up. He did come around for the first 3 years of my oldest child’s life and the first 10 months of my second child’s life. But after a little incident concerning my sister that ended our relationship. But my girls only ever knew my stepdad as pappaw. They didn’t see my donor enough to know who he was and that was on him. When my oldest son was born 9 weeks premature my stepdad was there for us. My donor never called, visited or even sent an email! My grandparents were so mad at him and my grandma said he was raised better than that! And he was! My grandparents were amazing loving wonderful grandparents and even better great grands. They did not approve of the way their son acted. And his not showing up for major life events. As hard as I tried and no matter how much I said he didn’t matter to me some part of me just couldn’t understand especially after I became a parent how he could just throw me away. What was so wrong with me? And try as I may every Father’s Day no matter how much I made it about my stepdad and my husband something would trigger a memory of my real dad like a Facebook post my sister made about what a wonderful daddy she has or most of my friends about how great their dads were. Then I’d just lose it and cry like a baby for about an hour. I just couldn’t understand how he could love one of his kids but not the other. How he could love my stepsister but not me. What did I do? Anytime we ever disagreed I’d always been the one to apologize but he never apologized and he verbally, emotionally, and mentally abused me. And so did his wife twice as much as he did. Father’s Day I HATED!!! Why couldn’t I have just been born to my stepdad. He & my mom ended up getting divorced because of his oldest who moved in with them and her 3 kids. She stole from my mom and my mom who almost died in a car wreck was doing everything for her kids. We adored her kids! But my mom wasn’t able. And she was telling all of us my mom was losing her mind. Funny thing was my stepsister was on drugs. But my stepdad believed everything she said. Until my mom left and he had her all to himself. She’s broken into his clinic multiple times looking for any drugs but after the first time he quit keeping anything there she could get. But for about 12 years it was easier on him and myself if we just kept our distance. He had his hands full and so did I with 5 kids and caring for my disabled mom. Unfortunately, his daughter passed from a drug overdose about 5 years after their divorce. But up until I was 40 years old was I able to come to terms with my donors betrayal and just total lack of any connection emotionally to me. For the first time since I was 15 was I able to get thru Father’s Day without crying or even giving it a thought. I still avoid any social media at all cost. If I see my sisters post it just makes me infuriated. And it’s still hurts seeing all of my friends posting about their amazing dads. I understand how much this can effect boys because they need that male role model to show them how a man should act and to instill good male values and morals in them. But it does effect some of us girls more than others in very tremendous ways also. Not having a good female and male role model definitely has major effects on both girls and boys.

    • @carmenperalta7207
      @carmenperalta7207 Год назад +2

      You. Have issues that you don't know what cause the separations, often our emotions are not clear..what happens with parents are not children to judge..your father is not a sperm donor, and when, we want to be adults ae, need to seek adult understanding and not childish behaviours...my father, remarried and I, could never have the nerve to disrespect him, by saying " sperm donor ", that's a person WHO your mother doesn't know, can be called that, but like I. Said mothers can often too drive the marriage sorrow by thier own actions too and given toxic behaviors to her children against the father..is, allot of factors in a relationship that goes both ways..but overall I, WOULDN'T be here in this world if. It wasn't for my father..and I, dont disrespect my parents ! Rather who's right or wrong..am neutral both are loved by me..and both are died..and you , need to realize one thing in life, if your father would DIE, would you still call him " sperm donor ", or missing him for the life. You have TODAY !! GOOD DAY

    • @nancywhite3501
      @nancywhite3501 Год назад +1

      @@carmenperalta7207 Sometimes people who are in extreme pain find it necessary to reframe a situation with a different name. I often suggest that an abusive parent could be mentally relabeled "Uncle" or "patient" etc. Whatever helps the person in pain to get some emotional distance from the trauma. " Sperm donor" is a marvelous way to get some emotional distance. It is actually a positive thing, since he willingly "donated" his DNA. I try not to shame someone who experienced trauma. NikiLivi5 was innocent. She was the abandoned child. On the other side, Carmen, it sounds like you have dealt with your dad's remarriage with compassion and objectivity. That is the other recommendation I have for people in emotional pain: objectivity and compassion. It sounds like both you and Nikilivi5 have created good lives for yourselves. Peace.

    • @birdscds47
      @birdscds47 Год назад +1

      Full marks for effort.

  • @MHiggins
    @MHiggins Год назад

    These women don’t understand the dangers of disenfranchising men to such a degree that it leaves millions of men with no hope.

  • @nicolaskutch2889
    @nicolaskutch2889 2 года назад +63

    This discussion is so needed these days. Society has become weak because we've lost sight of what's important. It's important to be reminded of that

    • @erinh9267
      @erinh9267 Год назад

      Poor men. Not necessarily weak men. And, the billionaires are causing that. Unions and worker and civil rights protect the poor from the billionaires parasitically leeching off the poor.

    • @nicolaskutch2889
      @nicolaskutch2889 Год назад +3

      @@erinh9267 Poor men for sure, but I would say that is partially due to weakness. The current environment is difficult to succeed in, but less men seem to care than ever before. Also wouldn't say billionaires are "parasitically leeching" on the poor. That's a belief that will keep you poor imo

    • @Rage_Harder_Then_Relax
      @Rage_Harder_Then_Relax Год назад

      @@nicolaskutch2889 No you're just weak.

    • @phillyfan-182
      @phillyfan-182 Год назад

      Just what I needed to hear!!!!

  • @tekannon7803
    @tekannon7803 2 года назад +63

    This is one of the most interesting, most informative and most revealing interviews with one of the most well-reasearched and intelligent guest speakers Patrick has ever interviewed. Every single sentence that Dr Farrell has said comes from solid research. And what he says about American society is frightening, because we can see how boys need a father-figure more than anything to guide them. As parents we have one of the most difficult jobs in the world. One day I subconsciously said to a friend of mine after he had an argument with his son that everything he said was being recorded by the kids. He said, "don't say that." It was hard growing up, but I had two parents all the way through. They didn't get on well, but they stuck it out for the kids and I'm grateful to have had a dad. My own father lost his dad when he was 7 so he sort of raised me giving me all the slack I needed to make practically every mistake in the world one could make. I've gone bankrupt several times and took about every wrong turn in the road you can imagine. One time I called him up in my mid-twenties and asked him, "hey, where were you when I was going through hell?" Something like that. He said, "When I saw you were not going to listen, I let you grow like a wild seed." I was furious, but now I see that he did me a great favor, because I've followed my own instincts through bad decisions and good ones. A guiding hand would have helped me stay clear of early failures perhaps, but losing on things you think you can do and can't is one of life's most precious lessons. Whatever has happened, I've made a life that I can really call my own. But I had a dad there, and I know that he and a mother helped me make it this far.

  • @drestat9253
    @drestat9253 2 года назад +1

    Great great convo! Thanks

  • @Valueandtime
    @Valueandtime 2 года назад +347

    Meanwhile russian kids are casually wrestling bears

    • @TheArtofKAS
      @TheArtofKAS 2 года назад +13

      You mean "Casually Tossing Bears"

    • @Valueandtime
      @Valueandtime 2 года назад +3

      @@TheArtofKAS that too 😂

    • @keeleenunknownlegend2943
      @keeleenunknownlegend2943 2 года назад +28

      Western countries and some other developed countries are only producing weak men. Others are making masculine men for future

    • @kittens_N_puppers
      @kittens_N_puppers 2 года назад +3

      @@TheArtofKAS gummy bears

    • @TheArtofKAS
      @TheArtofKAS 2 года назад +2

      @@kittens_N_puppers 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
      .
      wellll..... 🥸

  • @aldrigforsent8862
    @aldrigforsent8862 2 года назад +143

    The fact that most people don’t understand just how much infrastructure is needed, and how many institutions are required to create even the ability for us to walk down the street with some semblance of safety is simply astounding to me.

    • @Pernection
      @Pernection 2 года назад +2

      Women don't

    • @aldrigforsent8862
      @aldrigforsent8862 2 года назад +8

      I would submit that most people don't.
      Certain politically active groups have a vested interest in not understanding, or even obfuscating.

    • @hamzamalik9705
      @hamzamalik9705 2 года назад +2

      No I disagree, defund the police 👮‍♀️ 🤪😂😂

    • @zackodom8765
      @zackodom8765 2 года назад +13

      You're doing yourself a disservice if you consider how all of the infrastructure and institutions help you feel safe, and not how many of them actually perpetuate the things that keep you unsafe.

    • @RickOShay4u
      @RickOShay4u 2 года назад +1

      I once read that a judge ruled that police are NOT obligated to protect people!

  • @donnazukadley7300
    @donnazukadley7300 2 года назад +1

    The feminine movement benefited men more than women. Women were out in the workforce and then coming home and MOST STILL DOING ALL THE COOKING AND HOUSEWORK. Women were baking the bread AND making the bread. Cooking the bacon AND bringing home the bacon. And men didn't have to work two jobs, and just sit back while his wife was rushing home to work yet ANOTHER SHIFT, cooking and cleaning. And DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WOMEN BURNING THEIR BRAS!

  • @Juide80
    @Juide80 Год назад +3

    I think society acknowledges this crisis in some level but it needs to be acknowledged as a simple truth and as a huge problem that needs to be taken extremely seriously and to be worked on in every level of society for the decades to come with clear priority and clear objectives.
    This is a health crisis about to be a health disaster.

  • @oscarcarlos9384
    @oscarcarlos9384 2 года назад +213

    Having 3 young boys myself, this was priceless to me! Thank you Patrick for providing real value once again!

  • @christinstorm2526
    @christinstorm2526 2 года назад +17

    This is true in Scandinavia too.
    Thank you, both of you, there is so little truth to be heard these days, this was refreshing.

    • @solo-us4is
      @solo-us4is 2 года назад

      Check out gino jennings he speak the truth about lgbt and everything under the sun

    • @d.bcooper2271
      @d.bcooper2271 Год назад

      What's happening in Scandinavia?

  • @tommore3263
    @tommore3263 Год назад

    Certainly one of the most important people of our day. Excellent interview. We should all be listening to Warren Farrell.

  • @catholicfemininity2126
    @catholicfemininity2126 2 года назад

    There once was a guy that liked me, I was interested, but when he mentioned that someday he wants his wife to provide while he stays home and watches the kids, that turned me off REAL quick and I noped outta that.

  • @saashamoniquew1
    @saashamoniquew1 2 года назад +32

    I am currently reading Male versus Man, and they have similar points. A women can not raise a man, she can create a grown boy. Women do not want to hear, because they make the decisions they made out of love, but discipline is love too.

    • @erinh9267
      @erinh9267 Год назад +4

      That's not realistic. Women consistently discipline people. Theyre military officers, government, managers, sports coaches, and police officers. Look at the data from specialists: parents of both sexes discipline

    • @keenansmith7176
      @keenansmith7176 Год назад +5

      @Erin H You conflated women being in those positions with them being a disciplinarian. Just because they are there doesn't equate to being effective at disciplining people. Heck, most of those positions you named doesn't even have the responsibility of disciplining anyone.

    • @victorylapp
      @victorylapp Год назад +1

      Even the Bible says discipline is love . Hebrews 12:7 “Endure discipline, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten?”

    • @bustavonnutz
      @bustavonnutz Год назад

      @@erinh9267 All those positions you mentioned have only suffered with female participation; you're not making the point you're trying to make.

    • @Cbd_7ohm
      @Cbd_7ohm Год назад

      @@erinh9267 The military is getting worse. Bad argument.

  • @alanaadams7440
    @alanaadams7440 2 года назад +18

    When you have children your goals have to change. Your goal has to be the safety love values morals of the children. Children come FIRST. YOU GIVE UP YOURSELFISH IDEALS TO BE A GOOD PARENT