What The Hell Are Livestock Auctioneers Actually Saying?

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  • Опубликовано: 27 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 3,5 тыс.

  • @VICENews
    @VICENews  6 лет назад +480

    We went to the World Livestock Auctioneer Championship in Bloomington, Wisconsin to find out.
    Watch Next: This Comedy Duo Got Sued For Pranking The News - bit.ly/2GvEUUi

    • @1121494
      @1121494 6 лет назад +28

      Is this actually a World Championship, or is it an American Competition of Americans pretending to be the entire world again?

    • @tonymac1971
      @tonymac1971 6 лет назад +1

      I was just about to say that

    • @tonymac1971
      @tonymac1971 6 лет назад +2

      Where are the Australians if this is a world competition Australia has a massive livestock industry

    • @m.angelrenteria7569
      @m.angelrenteria7569 6 лет назад +2

      Canadians are awesome, only if they truly pledged loyalty to the rest of America. Instead of across the lake.

    • @cassiandramitchell4403
      @cassiandramitchell4403 6 лет назад

      VI
      CE News

  • @BeausArts
    @BeausArts 5 лет назад +8535

    Auctions like these are super stressing, cause you could scratch ur nose and then You own 100 cows

    • @truthsmiles
      @truthsmiles 5 лет назад +1399

      Nothing to worry about. If you're a complete noob (as I have been), they know it, and probably won't even pay attention to you unless you make a real effort to get noticed. In my case (I probably only buy 1-2 cows a year), if I want to bid, I shoot my hand up and hold my card up high until the auctioneer acknowledges the bid. I even sometimes have to wave to get his attention. Then, once he knows I'm 'in the running', a simple wave or nod will continue the bidding. I shake my head if I'm done.
      What you're probably thinking of is the professional buyers, who buy cattle for multiple large operators and bid on probably 80% of the cattle at a given auction (sometimes more). These guys have a special relationship with the auctioneer, who sees them every week. When such a buyer is present, the auctioneer will often 'check in' with them to see if there's interest, often registered, as you say, with a little hand flick or some hardly noticeable gesture... it's the kind of natural thing that happens when you know someone really well and can 'read their mind' just by the expression on their face.
      So, if you're ever contemplating going to an auction, don't worry - scratching your nose won't commit you to buying 100 head of cattle :-)
      And worst case, if you DO accidentally buy a cow, you can always just say "I changed my mind, run her through again", which means you want to sell her immediately and they'll just re-auction her. Sure, you might lose $100 in the transaction, but you won't have to figure out how to fit a cow in the trunk of your Honda Civic :-)

    • @tagyouritification
      @tagyouritification 5 лет назад +262

      @@truthsmiles I like your comment, truth with a tad of humor 🙂

    • @bengarbaag7114
      @bengarbaag7114 5 лет назад +160

      I once bought a truck because a fly landed on my nose. It happens.

    • @edmundprice5276
      @edmundprice5276 5 лет назад +35

      there is no cow level

    • @elmamiihen2153
      @elmamiihen2153 5 лет назад +3

      that's cheating

  • @imnotaweeb8935
    @imnotaweeb8935 6 лет назад +5055

    Top 10 rappers Eminem’s too afraid to diss

  • @cristianleija7107
    @cristianleija7107 5 лет назад +3074

    Did anybody else think that they were going to answer the questions with the auctioneer voice?!

    • @aliyare349
      @aliyare349 5 лет назад +129

      I was very disappointed when they started talking normal.

    • @pallee3971
      @pallee3971 5 лет назад +50

      I thought they were going to tell me what the auctioneer was saying !!! I still don't know what bid they are asking for.

    • @ashleyvonier1571
      @ashleyvonier1571 4 года назад +13

      @@pallee3971 they start at a base number and go up by certain dollar amounts so the number they're repeating is the current bid some will say "do I hear a 100" and go until you hear a YEP and then the raise the amounts

    • @alainportant6412
      @alainportant6412 4 года назад

      yes

    • @sakuyagiorno5843
      @sakuyagiorno5843 3 года назад +7

      Maybe the video was slowed down by 900% in post production.

  • @JagTheRipper
    @JagTheRipper 5 лет назад +4532

    "What are some of the challenges in this Industry?"
    "We need to target more vegetarians." That part was hilarious.

    • @user-sf4fy8bq1h
      @user-sf4fy8bq1h 5 лет назад +64

      Right lol? Oof, he got hit with the dumb stick

    •  5 лет назад +9

      @@user-sf4fy8bq1h
      Yeah, the guy sounded like he was suffering from veganism or another severe mental sickness.

    • @user-sf4fy8bq1h
      @user-sf4fy8bq1h 5 лет назад +57

      @ ...huh? I can tell you're trying _really_ hard to insult someone, but I genuinely can't tell who the target is. The desperation comes across loud and clear, though!

    • @user-sf4fy8bq1h
      @user-sf4fy8bq1h 5 лет назад +8

      @ You wanna offer some clarification on the intended target of that woefully miscrafted barb?

    • @user-sf4fy8bq1h
      @user-sf4fy8bq1h 5 лет назад +5

      @ That's alright! Better luck next time, hon.

  • @djclawson
    @djclawson 6 лет назад +6247

    "We need to reach the people who are eating vegetables for every meal."

    • @PenneyThoughts
      @PenneyThoughts 6 лет назад +463

      I know right! lol Notice how about 90% of the older white guys in the vid all have that big ol' beef belly, maybe they should put some more veggies on the plate.

    • @Stew_Pid
      @Stew_Pid 6 лет назад +555

      You're mistaking beef belly for carbs, mainly beer.

    • @aurijustriksys2695
      @aurijustriksys2695 6 лет назад +118

      Carbs is the best way to stay fit, it's the processed carbs like sugar you need to avoid, otherwise complex-carbohydrates (grains, legumes) and simple-carbs from fruits, veggies make you fit and energetic.

    • @Stew_Pid
      @Stew_Pid 6 лет назад +188

      Aurijus Trikšys carbs dont make you fit. Carbs are fuel to help you get fit. However too many carbs, of any kind, can make you fat. They dont have to be overly processed. There are plenty of fat vegans who love sweet potatoes.

    • @milamarshall9597
      @milamarshall9597 6 лет назад +20

      Alpha Centauri carbs definitely can make you fat. Eat potatoes every day and see how fat you get. Carbs are just sugar.

  • @Designed1
    @Designed1 5 лет назад +2922

    Me: What's the WiFi password?
    Friend: It's on the back of the router
    The back of the router:

    • @phillip9798
      @phillip9798 4 года назад +21

      Underrated

    • @hgfxjnn
      @hgfxjnn 4 года назад +10

      That's so me.... I have my router for 3 years now, and never changed the manufacture's Wifi password 😂

    • @Mysterio1500
      @Mysterio1500 4 года назад +7

      Jokes on you i use my neighbours wifi without them knowing

    • @oliverseoliverse
      @oliverseoliverse 3 года назад

      Lolol

    • @iqbal55
      @iqbal55 3 года назад

      Hahahahahaha

  • @makerstudios5456
    @makerstudios5456 6 лет назад +2643

    Its funny that they mostly speak slow as hell when regularly talking.

    • @valeera5415
      @valeera5415 6 лет назад +81

      we do that so dimwits like you can understand us

    • @tolazytooplay7295
      @tolazytooplay7295 6 лет назад +51

      @@valeera5415 you say "we" as if ur an auctioneer

    • @valeera5415
      @valeera5415 6 лет назад +75

      @@tolazytooplay7295 just on tuesdays at a local cattle auction , have to stay till all cows are sold , sometimes go on till midnight

    • @primodei
      @primodei 5 лет назад +4

      Love the Southerner Accent too!

    • @feraldeercolony
      @feraldeercolony 5 лет назад +21

      they gotta take a rest at some point, man.

  • @lucid_sound_design
    @lucid_sound_design 6 лет назад +1750

    "If you see a turtle on top of a fence post, it didn't get there by itself. And uh... I'm that turtle"
    This the funniest shit I've heard all day

    • @solhamer3502
      @solhamer3502 4 года назад +114

      A friend down South once told me:
      'Huhbedadad50badanow100bdbdbd50bdbdbb100now150bdnan200'

    • @jaynelson9543
      @jaynelson9543 4 года назад +3

      Besides pickle rick

    • @danadomino
      @danadomino 4 года назад +9

      IDK if you've ever seen the movie catch me if you can but I reminds me of the "two little mice fell into a bucket of cream" speech that the dad gives towards the start of the movie lol

    • @masamune3064
      @masamune3064 3 года назад +2

      @@solhamer3502 damn you for cracking me up

    • @davidjones3165
      @davidjones3165 3 года назад +2

      If you've ever owned turtles you know those suckers can climb

  • @happygrass5
    @happygrass5 3 года назад +254

    That Amish brotherhood just adds to the legitimacy of this entire world I've never ever thought existed

  • @who818
    @who818 6 лет назад +2482

    I always wondered what the male version of a beauty pageant would be like.....question answered

    • @bigmcrunfast
      @bigmcrunfast 6 лет назад +97

      I always thought it would be bodybuilding

    • @lukequinlan4523
      @lukequinlan4523 6 лет назад +22

      You don't sell beauty queens lol

    • @Manicmanuel
      @Manicmanuel 6 лет назад +22

      still none ot their suits fit....... the trousers are the worst part

    • @juliweizen1759
      @juliweizen1759 6 лет назад +3

      @@lukequinlan4523 I think jovan turner meant the auctioneer championchip and not the auctions^^

    • @lukequinlan4523
      @lukequinlan4523 6 лет назад

      @@juliweizen1759 ahhhhh

  • @JorgeGeorgeD
    @JorgeGeorgeD 6 лет назад +1307

    "I'm that turtle".
    - Jared Miller, 2018 WLAC Champion.

    • @AntonioKowatsch
      @AntonioKowatsch 6 лет назад +9

      That's what Jeb Bush said... LOL

    • @fenrirgg
      @fenrirgg 6 лет назад +3

      Aren't we all that turtle?

    • @SuzanneKowalski
      @SuzanneKowalski 6 лет назад +1

      I like turtles!

    • @n0denz
      @n0denz 6 лет назад +14

      It's actually really poetic when you think about it. The saying means that if you see someone with a great achievement, then he didn't get there by himself. Jared then juxtaposes himself, a vocal speed demon, with a turtle, obviously known for being slow. In all, it's a show of both humility and wit.

    • @jirehjirehjirehjireh
      @jirehjirehjirehjireh 6 лет назад

      TetrisClock That is indeed true...he’s also that turtle.

  • @Lomhow
    @Lomhow 3 года назад +249

    The guy who answered "disease" when it came to the threat to the live stock community was absolutely right

    • @MistressGlowWorm
      @MistressGlowWorm Год назад +7

      Disease contact tracing. That one was a brilliant response. It’s a big issue from what I understand?

  • @jhondoux84
    @jhondoux84 6 лет назад +608

    men with great hats {a short film}

  • @shortievid
    @shortievid 6 лет назад +450

    It's the hat. The power comes for the Hat. 🤠🤠

    • @alexjohnward
      @alexjohnward 5 лет назад +2

      In Australia they might have a really worn out hat, to show they don't make much commission.

    • @jpeg.600x2
      @jpeg.600x2 5 лет назад +1

      *from

    • @hardpack187
      @hardpack187 5 лет назад +1

      Eeuuh it's like a switch...like a machine

    • @ME-wu9dy
      @ME-wu9dy 5 лет назад

      Yee haw

  • @agn728
    @agn728 3 года назад +831

    I want to see a version of a prank show where these dudes go undercover in like downtown Detroit or Philly on open mic night and drop some fast bars and watch the whole hood go crazy 😂

    • @Truckerdaddy
      @Truckerdaddy 3 года назад +28

      Could you imagine Twista, Tech N9ne, or Busta Rhymes as auctioneer.

    • @6Texasboi
      @6Texasboi 2 года назад +8

      There's a video on RUclips of auctioneers with rap beats playing and it's hilarious

    • @MistressGlowWorm
      @MistressGlowWorm Год назад +2

      @@TruckerdaddyTwista held a world record for the fastest rap so my money would be on him.

  • @MrJorge6986
    @MrJorge6986 6 лет назад +495

    Don’t worry old timer. You are world champion to me :)

  • @MisterTingles
    @MisterTingles 6 лет назад +958

    a bowlcut, a unibrow *AND* a mouthbreather?! how does that guy keep the ladies off himself without carrying a sharp stick everywhere he goes?

    • @ashscott6068
      @ashscott6068 5 лет назад +58

      This is why arranged marriages are a thing. Though, I suspect his will be one of the last to be arranged

    • @jdz9952
      @jdz9952 5 лет назад +33

      An alpha male

    • @888pil
      @888pil 5 лет назад +16

      bruh I'm crying 😂

    • @chanekawaihae7540
      @chanekawaihae7540 5 лет назад +2

      MrTingles LMFAO

    • @averagedude9378
      @averagedude9378 5 лет назад +2

      Time stamp?

  • @samisavage891
    @samisavage891 3 года назад +920

    4:05 the music as the humping cows walk past made me cry laughing

    • @theultraatomicgamer
      @theultraatomicgamer 3 года назад +5

      Me too

    • @jonathanwilliams1065
      @jonathanwilliams1065 3 года назад +45

      This bull is just casually fucking the cow

    • @cartermccauley7352
      @cartermccauley7352 3 года назад +51

      That’s actually a girl when cows are in tight spaces they will ride each other. Not gay cows but just natural

    • @cartermccauley7352
      @cartermccauley7352 3 года назад

      @Craig Boothill yeah

    • @tacomas9602
      @tacomas9602 3 года назад +3

      @Craig Boothill see it all the time here working with heifers, it's my understanding the smell of the animal being in heat will attract other animals even if they're also a female cattle species lol

  • @nessmastergengar4686
    @nessmastergengar4686 5 лет назад +884

    Who else heard "Doug Dimadome"

    • @nayelip2388
      @nayelip2388 5 лет назад +78

      Owner of the dimsdale dimadome?

    • @HEWHOTAWNS
      @HEWHOTAWNS 5 лет назад +52

      @@nayelip2388 that's right! Doug Dimmadome! Owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome!

    • @raymondboop4069
      @raymondboop4069 5 лет назад +46

      NessMasterGengar! ! The same Doug Dimmadome the owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome where they're showing Crash nebula on ice?

    • @morningowl4768
      @morningowl4768 5 лет назад +22

      On ice?

    • @Clauds1005
      @Clauds1005 5 лет назад +8

      You guys made my day. Love y’all

  • @Barrenge
    @Barrenge 6 лет назад +907

    Obviously the hat is everything...

    • @BayuAH
      @BayuAH 6 лет назад +7

      I knew it! There something with the hat.

    • @martincurtis2257
      @martincurtis2257 6 лет назад +1

      What

    • @wcaz
      @wcaz 6 лет назад +4

      It’s that hat boot combo

    • @syxx242
      @syxx242 6 лет назад +2

      gotta wear a Stetson !

    • @Johnnycdrums
      @Johnnycdrums 6 лет назад +3

      Hat's ain't cheap.

  • @Hellooo134
    @Hellooo134 5 лет назад +282

    I love the huge drop in energy in the room when they announced it because everyone collectively realized they lost

  • @fundude4566
    @fundude4566 5 лет назад +566

    Was reading recently. Did you know that 35% of Auctioneers have a net worth of a $1 million or more?

  • @kabascoolr
    @kabascoolr 6 лет назад +649

    Whoever edited this needs an award.

    • @patrickm5217
      @patrickm5217 6 лет назад +8

      The award is a sweet job at vice

    • @CountyLineCowpokes
      @CountyLineCowpokes 3 года назад

      If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly RUclips channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical RUclips channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

  • @felixm868
    @felixm868 4 года назад +387

    4:36 man was living 2 years ahead of everyone

    • @wliaputs
      @wliaputs 3 года назад +10

      He saw it

    • @Literallyryangosling777
      @Literallyryangosling777 3 года назад +23

      When the man is sus

    • @adammaulana3314
      @adammaulana3314 3 года назад +9

      No man, the place is pretty stinks u know...

    • @idkidc7513
      @idkidc7513 3 года назад +8

      Nah man, it's called basic health care knowledge. If you're sick then you have to take care of yourself and the others

    • @animaanimus8011
      @animaanimus8011 3 года назад +1

      Probably on chemo. I’ve been on chemo off and on for five years and have had to wear a mask because it ruins your immune system.

  • @keremkelleboz6959
    @keremkelleboz6959 6 лет назад +653

    *Texas intesifies*

    • @user-sf4fy8bq1h
      @user-sf4fy8bq1h 5 лет назад +2

      Wasn't this in Wisconsin, though?

    • @Kato_The_Snowman
      @Kato_The_Snowman 5 лет назад +9

      As a Texan I approve this message

    • @jdogexe
      @jdogexe 5 лет назад +3

      As a Texan too, I approve of this message

    • @maddiehall5317
      @maddiehall5317 4 года назад +1

      As a texan three, I approve this message

    • @Kentucky_Caveman
      @Kentucky_Caveman 4 года назад +3

      Not a Texan, but I approve of this message.

  • @nataliyakhmil6693
    @nataliyakhmil6693 5 лет назад +646

    This is just a pageant for guys in cowboy hats

  • @redcar9949
    @redcar9949 4 года назад +89

    1:07 30 auctioneers can somehow replicate the sounds of a middle school cafeteria filled with 300-400 kids

  • @infini.tesimo
    @infini.tesimo 6 лет назад +957

    They are rappers and don't even know it

    • @JackgarPrime
      @JackgarPrime 6 лет назад +2

      I wonder if Snow (the "Informer" guy) ever did any auctioneering? Seems like he'd be a natural.

    • @welwitschia
      @welwitschia 6 лет назад +19

      No! Them rappers are black folks, and these good folks ain't like them. Or some other racist excuse like that.

    • @Alex-uy7pc
      @Alex-uy7pc 6 лет назад +43

      Wait, auctioneers predate rap. So how do we know rappers arnt really just auctioneers?

    • @londyn9314
      @londyn9314 6 лет назад

      Yes

    • @ig7002
      @ig7002 6 лет назад +7

      @@welwitschia What? You're the only person saying something racist lol.

  • @raimesey
    @raimesey 5 лет назад +1819

    I love how Americans call themselves world champions of things only Americans do!

    • @joshuachesney7552
      @joshuachesney7552 5 лет назад +487

      They're technically not wrong.

    • @deadpicklechinahboi4777
      @deadpicklechinahboi4777 5 лет назад +92

      U mad?

    • @_Gilles_
      @_Gilles_ 5 лет назад +150

      Stems from their entitlement mentality

    • @jaysekhon8014
      @jaysekhon8014 5 лет назад +141

      Open challenge to the rest of the world to come beat us at our games then ;)

    • @mmcmann9539
      @mmcmann9539 5 лет назад +8

      Well, we don't usually have American champions, we would have US or Canadian champions, etc.

  • @mariam19554
    @mariam19554 5 лет назад +186

    be rootin
    be tootin
    but most importantly
    _be kind_

    • @KingreX32
      @KingreX32 3 года назад

      ...........kootin...?!!?!

  • @ijuldzulfadli903
    @ijuldzulfadli903 6 лет назад +656

    4:05 what you guys really looking for

    • @donharrus9994
      @donharrus9994 6 лет назад +8

      Cat , meow no thats what the Amish dude's lookn for...something to bang n hang

    • @904czv4
      @904czv4 6 лет назад +1

      Lol 😆

    • @zapataboxing861
      @zapataboxing861 6 лет назад

      Hajajja

    • @tannyocean9984
      @tannyocean9984 6 лет назад +32

      the classical music is what makes it better

    • @rzkzkr20
      @rzkzkr20 6 лет назад +7

      10 seconds into video I see this comment, I click and see a majestic scene and sound.

  • @NosillaWilla
    @NosillaWilla 6 лет назад +2244

    This was way too short. Damnit Vice. I could have watched this for ages

    • @AnthonyTNT85
      @AnthonyTNT85 6 лет назад +9

      Fr lol I like wagchi g things like this, even though it isn't in our interests or everyday life or anything it's amazing/fascinating, VICE lol

    • @johnmanigold1840
      @johnmanigold1840 6 лет назад +8

      I too use my time wisely

    • @AnotherOne0322
      @AnotherOne0322 6 лет назад +2

      Not even 10 mins man

    • @bently629
      @bently629 6 лет назад

      Me too

    • @frederickballard8510
      @frederickballard8510 6 лет назад +5

      Idk how i got here but Im high and this is orgasmic

  • @carlys1391
    @carlys1391 3 года назад +169

    My family owns an auction business and we sell construction equipment. After ten years of listening to the auctioneers, I know exactly what they’re saying 😄

    • @CountyLineCowpokes
      @CountyLineCowpokes 3 года назад +1

      If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly RUclips channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical RUclips channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

    • @otaviofrnazario
      @otaviofrnazario 3 года назад +2

      Congratulations. You're fluent in auctioneering

    • @JorgeCanovas
      @JorgeCanovas 2 года назад

      You are blessed.

  • @hipsterimagestudios6349
    @hipsterimagestudios6349 6 лет назад +1325

    This would make an incredible anime

    • @Supectible
      @Supectible 6 лет назад +25

      HipsterImage Studios nani?

    • @alexcastro8425
      @alexcastro8425 6 лет назад +19

      It already is. Have you heard people in Death March to The Parallel World Rhapsody casting spells?

    • @sistermoonchildyoga9286
      @sistermoonchildyoga9286 6 лет назад +18

      thats the smartest fucking thing I've ever heard

    • @londyn9314
      @londyn9314 6 лет назад +1

      Yes

    • @0prahTV
      @0prahTV 6 лет назад +16

      I hope it has a hot springs episode

  • @val.s2866
    @val.s2866 5 лет назад +154

    I accidentally clicked on this video but i just kept watching

    • @syproful
      @syproful 3 года назад +3

      There is no accidental clicking. The great algorithm made you click it. Maybe, you now actually are a cow seller yourself. So many years later.

  • @edcrfvtgbyhnujmikolpqazwsx
    @edcrfvtgbyhnujmikolpqazwsx 3 года назад +144

    I'm not as impressed by their ability to speak like that, as I am of the people in the audience who are able to understand them.

    • @tyemaddog
      @tyemaddog 3 года назад

      I don't think anyone can understand them haha. Such a bizarre thing. Like it can't actually make any difference on people's bids can it?? 🤔

    • @lucky43113
      @lucky43113 2 года назад

      @@tyemaddog Its easy to understand and yes they make you want to bid more

    • @0554joe
      @0554joe 2 года назад

      I mean, as long as you can hear the numbers, and know what the current bid is, everything else doesn’t seem to matter

    • @canada420mma
      @canada420mma 2 года назад

      @Zero friends damn, that's crazy

    • @saltMagic
      @saltMagic 2 года назад +3

      The speed gets the buyers anxious to get more involved. It’s psychological…they aren’t actually even saying words but just the numbers

  • @pramath_bhat
    @pramath_bhat 6 лет назад +244

    To the guy on who this documentary was based on.... You are the winner for me...

    • @CountyLineCowpokes
      @CountyLineCowpokes 3 года назад

      If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly RUclips channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical RUclips channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

  • @alienfire223
    @alienfire223 6 лет назад +255

    I don't know if Vice was intending to make this a parody or it was all just lighthearted editing. I actually thought this story was insightful and interesting.

    • @JackgarPrime
      @JackgarPrime 6 лет назад +22

      I think it was just a lighthearted thing. The guys themselves didn't take it overly serious so I guess they figured it was fine to have some fun with it. Like the humping shot.

    • @seventeen9718
      @seventeen9718 6 лет назад +8

      It's really well done. Like you said, some light-hearted fun that doesn't at all detract from the entertainment value. Not too much judgement, just a well made, interesting, short doc.
      Good job, Vice.

  • @PlatinumEagleStudios
    @PlatinumEagleStudios 3 года назад +141

    Dude someone get this guy a record deal. He spits MAD bars at 6:06

    • @JorgeCanovas
      @JorgeCanovas 2 года назад +6

      All you need to do is get him to literally SPEAK rap lyrics at that speed. He’d literally whoop Busta Rhymes ass. Automatic GRAMMY nomination.

    • @morgana8037
      @morgana8037 Год назад +2

      Busta rhymes? man, that's nothin. I'm afraid he'd beat Eminem's ass in a rap battle...

  • @Metonymy1979
    @Metonymy1979 6 лет назад +362

    "Turtle on top of a fence post" best quote ever

    • @zoki.to974
      @zoki.to974 6 лет назад +3

      there is a video of turtle (or tortoise) climbing over chicken fence at least 6ft tall....

    • @kingwalton9598
      @kingwalton9598 6 лет назад

      Metonymy1979 FC dugongs I am

    • @omw2fyb363
      @omw2fyb363 6 лет назад +1

      the person down south who told him that must've​ been high asf

    • @412hwc
      @412hwc 6 лет назад +1

      Metonymy1979 beat quote ever is what my boss told me once, me and his son were getting our ass whooped with a frame for tha scaffold and he said damn yall look like two turtles fuccin a football 😂

  • @johnsajeth1018
    @johnsajeth1018 6 лет назад +290

    That glorious music while the bull was trying to smash... I wished I had that instrumental when smashing lol.

    • @m.t-thoughts8919
      @m.t-thoughts8919 6 лет назад +2

      Lol

    • @ja_se
      @ja_se 6 лет назад +1

      😂

    • @TheRsktek
      @TheRsktek 6 лет назад +5

      That was not a bull...

    • @Smoobloob
      @Smoobloob 6 лет назад +1

      Hey man people been playing Brown Sugar and such when they smash since the 90s no reason you can't do that with this tune.

    • @Jimmy2toes4u
      @Jimmy2toes4u 6 лет назад +3

      Literally came across this comment and looked up just in time to see it go down

  • @theskeletonappearsinthisco5896
    @theskeletonappearsinthisco5896 3 года назад +26

    ''when a girl talks slowly to you its a sign she likes you'' girls talking to me: 0:10

    • @RebelGaming4U
      @RebelGaming4U 3 года назад

      You a CPP fan? Just asking bc I noticed the profile pic.

  • @jason4275
    @jason4275 6 лет назад +237

    *Someone need to make a mumble rap album with these guys, I bet these guys could spit BARS, without any profanity.*

    • @orphfinthewizard1774
      @orphfinthewizard1774 6 лет назад +4

      Why it got to be rapping, stick too country, leave that garbage over there. Stay out of our culture vultures.

    • @nggaknormal
      @nggaknormal 6 лет назад +2

      @@orphfinthewizard1774 PFFFFFFFFFFTTTT

    • @leonardomateos5572
      @leonardomateos5572 6 лет назад

      Ooofff

    • @Pfromm007
      @Pfromm007 6 лет назад +2

      @@leonardomateos5572 *leans in* - He's 'that' kind of wizard...

  • @n0denz
    @n0denz 6 лет назад +37

    You're a champ to me, Jay. Screw the interviews. You've got the industry in your heart, and I hear it in your voice.

  • @vdd4399
    @vdd4399 4 года назад +70

    His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy. There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti · He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready

    • @adventureguy4119
      @adventureguy4119 3 года назад +6

      To sell cows

    • @bibianaguadalupeislasherre9880
      @bibianaguadalupeislasherre9880 3 года назад +1

      *Starts singing* 🎶🎤

    • @louistracy6964
      @louistracy6964 3 года назад +1

      @@glooze I'll buy that.

    • @CountyLineCowpokes
      @CountyLineCowpokes 3 года назад

      If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly RUclips channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical RUclips channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

  • @highflop3464
    @highflop3464 6 лет назад +855

    Did any one see what happens at 4:05 ?

    • @mayhemcry
      @mayhemcry 6 лет назад +136

      I did. Lol together with that gregorian chant music hahaha

    • @KayColeLynn
      @KayColeLynn 5 лет назад +43

      Okay city boy not only do animals do that as a dominance thing but considering that cow was at auction it was most definitely a steer (castrated cow) not bull or at least a female in heat causing the Male or other female to get raled up and mount that specific cow

    • @MJ-me5zd
      @MJ-me5zd 5 лет назад +139

      @@KayColeLynn is it just me or do you have an attitude for no reason or is that just me? The comment didnt say anything you needed to explain."city boy" as an insult because someone may not be educated about an issue makes you look like youre trying to divide people. For what? Im sure city people know more than you assume. My sister is a city girl and goes to farms to help out and has saved animals that the owners were neglecting. Where someone is from has nothing to do with what they "know"

    • @favrerules04
      @favrerules04 5 лет назад +18

      That heifer was getting her some BBC!

    • @unlimitedperseverance1706
      @unlimitedperseverance1706 5 лет назад +32

      @@KayColeLynn okay country hick

  • @alfred3299
    @alfred3299 6 лет назад +492

    0:38 Damn that unibrow game strong af

    • @pseudonymousbeing987
      @pseudonymousbeing987 6 лет назад +13

      Jealous?

    • @lopan776
      @lopan776 6 лет назад +38

      No joke man that brow thicker than the great wall of china

    • @sebg6865
      @sebg6865 6 лет назад +10

      I had to rewind cause he was so ugly

    • @lopan776
      @lopan776 6 лет назад +19

      In his world tho that brow be pulling all the hoes

    • @TheBaldOne
      @TheBaldOne 6 лет назад +12

      I wish my mustache was that thicc

  • @marinewauquier8630
    @marinewauquier8630 5 лет назад +146

    Vice news answering questions my French highschool student ass never knew could be asked

  • @peterw.1997
    @peterw.1997 5 лет назад +128

    $5 bdddddddddddd
    $10 bddddddddd
    $15 bdddddddddd
    That's all they are saying.
    I am a world champion.

  • @em4957
    @em4957 5 лет назад +92

    my grandpa was an auctioneer. top of his graduating class at auctioneer school. i was always mesmerized by the talent and skill it takes to be able to do this

    • @livewellwitheds6885
      @livewellwitheds6885 3 года назад +17

      there are... schools? damn

    • @DementedLycan
      @DementedLycan 2 года назад +1

      @@livewellwitheds6885 yep. I was just as shocked as you were when I found out lol.

  • @ButchBirdie
    @ButchBirdie 4 года назад +214

    Awww I wanted the main guy to win, he seems so nice. Also LMAOOO 4:06 WITH THE CHOIR IN THE BACKGROUND AND EVERYTHING

    • @buchanfoulsham6314
      @buchanfoulsham6314 3 года назад +7

      He went on to become champion the next year mate, I git a bit emotionally invested myself and googled him to check!

  • @miskolinaccc
    @miskolinaccc 6 лет назад +595

    This is one of the best videos you have put on the RUclips lately, surely, it's not really as thought-provoking as some other pieces, but it's still extremely enjoyable, especially the music background, well done!

    • @TotalRookie_LV
      @TotalRookie_LV 6 лет назад +12

      Absolutely agree. There is something enCHANTING about the sound composition of this piece.

    • @ThatLoudCockatoo
      @ThatLoudCockatoo 6 лет назад +18

      I know right? Everyone was out covering politics and social issues and one guy was just like I WANT TO TALK ABOUT LIVESTOCK AUCTIONEERS.

    • @actuasco
      @actuasco 6 лет назад +7

      no, i want stories on trans babies

    • @colonelcorazonsantiago7335
      @colonelcorazonsantiago7335 6 лет назад +8

      The documenting of unique traditions, customs, lifestyles of people is important from a historical perspective. 100 years from now, people will look on this video with even more curiosity than we do today.

    • @emill232
      @emill232 6 лет назад +1

      The piece they where playing in the beginning was Dvorak's 9th symphony. The famous "new world symphony." The first movement I believe, but the last movement is the more well known.

  • @jmgmarcus808
    @jmgmarcus808 6 лет назад +187

    In thought they were going to answer the questions with their auction voice, that would have been awesome.

  • @timothyberry9084
    @timothyberry9084 3 года назад +74

    My friend that does auctioneering will throw in buy me a beer and stuff like that and it's halarious when you actually catch him saying it

  • @ibetrollintheybehatin6857
    @ibetrollintheybehatin6857 6 лет назад +174

    I raised my hand like 40 times and nothing happened

  • @galnamedtal
    @galnamedtal 6 лет назад +104

    Why isn’t there a swim suit competition?

  • @mrjazz2570
    @mrjazz2570 3 года назад +22

    The guy at 5:47 has the nicest sounding voice in the world

  • @champspg
    @champspg 6 лет назад +154

    My guy Jay was getting a little choked up at the end there. Keep up the good work, Jay! You'll get 'em next year.

  • @GundamFlexing
    @GundamFlexing 5 лет назад +52

    *Top 10 mumble rappers you've never heard of*

    • @alejandrozuniga4426
      @alejandrozuniga4426 4 года назад +1

      i understand more these guys than many mumble rappers

    • @Luxstar13
      @Luxstar13 4 года назад

      bloody hell they are more clear than mumble rappers you just need to focus and keep up.

  • @LETOreptiles
    @LETOreptiles 6 лет назад +551

    Lol those Amish guys in the crowd

  • @ianb8885
    @ianb8885 6 лет назад +117

    What am i doing? I have an 8 am class tomorrow.

  • @nitroromero7172
    @nitroromero7172 3 года назад +38

    This is some hypnosis right here. Went into an auction just to watch, walked out owning 60 cows. 🤣

  • @Ell355ar
    @Ell355ar 6 лет назад +44

    Came here to see a breakdown of an auctioneers speech with some useless fillers to get close to 10 mins.
    Got a great insight in a subculture I'd never though about.
    Perfect score 5/7

  • @tawnystill8341
    @tawnystill8341 6 лет назад +64

    It's like a male country pageant show

    • @CountyLineCowpokes
      @CountyLineCowpokes 3 года назад

      Ha! If you enjoy farming, I think you'd enjoy our family friendly RUclips channel, County Line Cowpokes. It's not your typical RUclips channel.....it integrates beautiful rural scenery including drone footage, some agricultural education and lots of laughs to make it fun to watch!!

  • @MrCrashsystem
    @MrCrashsystem 3 года назад +8

    2 questions. 1: have you ever thought about an alternative career as a rapper? 2: is the hat mandatory?

  • @ezio_auditore5425
    @ezio_auditore5425 6 лет назад +396

    The dudes at 4:34 look like members of Dwight Schrutes family from The Office lol

    • @carloscarias6276
      @carloscarias6276 6 лет назад +3

      I was gonna comment that 😂

    • @Big_Doink
      @Big_Doink 6 лет назад +5

      this made my night

    • @ezio_auditore5425
      @ezio_auditore5425 6 лет назад +1

      @@Big_Doink you saying that made MY night

    • @hindugoat2302
      @hindugoat2302 6 лет назад +13

      0:38 check out that mono brow !

    • @eryes2000
      @eryes2000 6 лет назад

      Dude no kidding, I thought the same thing when I saw those dudes.

  • @DJAUDIO1
    @DJAUDIO1 6 лет назад +42

    See. Why did you have to do the viewers like that? We were all riding for Jay to win. I hope he comes back in 2019.

  • @TacoStacks
    @TacoStacks 2 года назад +1

    Most auctioneers aren't like this, these guys are the elite of the elite in Auctioneers.

  • @TheresaR
    @TheresaR 6 лет назад +134

    Hard choice...they were all really good.

  • @garrysekelli6776
    @garrysekelli6776 6 лет назад +310

    ı'm pretty sure it's just to confuse people so they accidentally bid even though they have no idea what price they are actually bidding for.

    • @em4957
      @em4957 5 лет назад +21

      Garry Sekelli nah, once you get used to it you can easily tell what price they’re on

    • @jpjpjp453
      @jpjpjp453 5 лет назад +3

      I used to work at an auction company. After a while it's a snap to follow the calls and prices.

    • @stevethecountrycook1227
      @stevethecountrycook1227 5 лет назад +7

      Example! EHHH iddy botty bitty bop- You just bought the neibors dog, and his sister!

    • @stevethecountrycook1227
      @stevethecountrycook1227 5 лет назад +2

      $22.50

    • @nate_kang
      @nate_kang 5 лет назад +2

      lmao fax

  • @TimBryan
    @TimBryan 4 года назад +73

    My man at 4:37 was ahead of his time.

    • @jokerraton8183
      @jokerraton8183 4 года назад +8

      So used to seeing them now that I didnt even notice

    • @Mustacheman17
      @Mustacheman17 3 года назад

      mans really was

  • @illlli7469
    @illlli7469 6 лет назад +92

    I hope he wins next year

    • @Kyle-21-
      @Kyle-21- 6 лет назад +19

      your name is what the auctioneers are saying

  • @Dead_Last
    @Dead_Last 6 лет назад +186

    4:04 rofl The music and that Humping Bull

    • @anu.
      @anu. 6 лет назад +8

      Haha I thought i was the only one who noticed that!

    • @TheElloatmatt
      @TheElloatmatt 6 лет назад

      LMFAOOOOOO

    • @stifflers69mom1
      @stifflers69mom1 6 лет назад +1

      DeadLast he’s all up in those sugar walls

    • @londyn9314
      @londyn9314 6 лет назад

      Yes same here

    • @HairyBalls2896
      @HairyBalls2896 6 лет назад

      I think they did that on purpose lol

  • @fakrul7004
    @fakrul7004 3 года назад +8

    Eminem: The fastest rapper
    Livestock Auctioneers: Hold my cow

  • @varuniiij9628
    @varuniiij9628 6 лет назад +76

    I thought my Indian accent was hard for some people

  • @motoquasi
    @motoquasi 6 лет назад +68

    RUclips automatic captions fails this one.

    • @lietsiyon3464
      @lietsiyon3464 6 лет назад +1

      It just says music

    • @haanpham4667
      @haanpham4667 6 лет назад

      And 99% of non-native english speaker I guess.

  • @marleyboy7732
    @marleyboy7732 3 года назад +19

    My daddy never told me the story about the turtle on a fence post. He told me if I could piss on the hotwire and walk away standing. I would be a real man....That was a bad day. But dad never stopped laughing again.

    • @LaurieAnnCurry
      @LaurieAnnCurry 3 года назад +2

      We might have said this to my nephew one day; might have……………. We’re still laughing

    • @marleyboy7732
      @marleyboy7732 3 года назад +2

      @@LaurieAnnCurry 🤣🤣🤣

  • @shongsie
    @shongsie 5 лет назад +147

    4:06 so we’re just going to ignore that ?? aight

    • @farisarrazi1200
      @farisarrazi1200 4 года назад +6

      Lmao

    • @KKISCRAZYFUL
      @KKISCRAZYFUL 3 года назад +9

      Someone's getting two for the price of one

    • @HalfGuard994
      @HalfGuard994 3 года назад +1

      I’m fuuuucking screaming lmfaooo!!!

    • @Girrrrrrrr
      @Girrrrrrrr 3 года назад +1

      Came lookin fer this comment cant stop laughing

  • @outdoorsy01
    @outdoorsy01 5 лет назад +56

    Its a accentual lingo to create a barrier between ordinary folk and the long term customer to ensure its their long term customer gets the deal

  • @rookincharge2780
    @rookincharge2780 3 года назад +8

    Oh hey, my sister went to college there. And when we landed in that tiny town, where only one plane can land at a time, a cow was chilling in a cornfield across the street from the front doors of the airport. Good times.
    Even left my Kindle and ipod on the plane. We turned around, and it was at the front desk. Thankfully the plane wouldn't leave until the next morning.

  • @thestudentofficial5483
    @thestudentofficial5483 6 лет назад +195

    Some auctioneers should make Country Rap Album lol

    • @OttoMatieque
      @OttoMatieque 5 лет назад +4

      No / we do not need those two kinds of music in the same paragraph

    • @theshamelesskid2950
      @theshamelesskid2950 5 лет назад +1

      Than Old Time Road happened

    • @tziporah9788
      @tziporah9788 5 лет назад +1

      Four years ago when Vine was in its prime someone put popular hip hop tracks under auctioneers talking. I’m not sure what you search to find them, maybe auctioneer rap vine or something but I remember then actually going hard.

    • @stevethecountrycook1227
      @stevethecountrycook1227 5 лет назад

      That would be CRAP!

    • @OttoMatieque
      @OttoMatieque 5 лет назад

      @@mountainsky4279 correct - I was just going bigger

  • @farmerd6
    @farmerd6 6 лет назад +16

    I have been a farmer all my life. going to auctions have always been part of farming,. not only for business but also socially. if you haven't seen a good auctioneer at work you have truly missed a life experience.

  • @TripleIProductions
    @TripleIProductions 5 лет назад +13

    2:23 - Took me a while to realize he wasn't speaking about fake beef between the auctioneers but ACTUAL fake beef. RUclips has ruined me.

  • @andif.izdiharuddien9372
    @andif.izdiharuddien9372 6 лет назад +34

    "Bid 20, bid 20, bid 20 dollar bidder, now 30, now 30 dollar money"
    Now its playin' in my head over and over.

  • @nicolasgarcia7467
    @nicolasgarcia7467 6 лет назад +40

    4:06 that boy getting it in

  • @gil9905
    @gil9905 3 года назад +11

    I didn't know a competition like this existed... But this is so freaking cool!!!

  • @Jonathan-bu7iv
    @Jonathan-bu7iv 5 лет назад +138

    0:38
    Bowl cut + unibrow. That is amazing.
    Also. I still don't understand what they're saying haha.

    • @jetfire1099
      @jetfire1099 5 лет назад +12

      Tiep He’s Amish, it’s part of their culture

    • @rm9308
      @rm9308 5 лет назад

      It's also cheap.

    • @nate_kang
      @nate_kang 5 лет назад +5

      AND he's a mouthbreather.
      Bet he's a chick magnet.

    • @CathyGoes
      @CathyGoes 3 года назад +5

      ​@@nate_kang Apparently not a chick magnet. LOL He's completely clean shaven but looks to be of marriageable age. Clean shaven is unmarried for the Amish.

    • @jerrycan5145
      @jerrycan5145 3 года назад +1

      @@CathyGoes r/woosh

  • @johnc8327
    @johnc8327 5 лет назад +44

    2:39 "We need to reach the people that are eating vegetables everyday for every meal".... lmfao!!!!

  • @cmiller9800
    @cmiller9800 4 года назад +4

    the sound director for this video did an amazing job!

  • @mirceagogoncea
    @mirceagogoncea 6 лет назад +8

    This is absolutely mental! xD
    Also, +100 points for whoever did the editing.
    Seriously, this was such a work of art I seriously feel like just rewatching the whole video!

  • @Sobriety5424
    @Sobriety5424 5 лет назад +28

    “If it were deeper it would be better” I feel you bud. Nothing feels worse than bottoming out with another three inches to spare

  • @ReallyTY4Real
    @ReallyTY4Real 3 года назад +8

    Imagine if EVERYONE spoke in this tone, how awfull would lunch meetings be...

  • @noval0gic
    @noval0gic 6 лет назад +40

    Eminem has some competition

  • @MrScratchykatz
    @MrScratchykatz 6 лет назад +44

    LMFAO MY SON JAY GOT STR8 BARS

  • @Antipodean33
    @Antipodean33 2 года назад +5

    Gotta admit when I was a young fella and started going to auctions I got caught up in the whole atmosphere and till I learnt, I paid dearly for that enthusiasm. I remember heaps of people bidding and it was all going so fast, to be honest I didn't even know where the bid was, then all of a sudden it came to a screeching halt and the auctioneer looked me dead in the eye and said "you bought it son"

    • @nicolaslanzoni9385
      @nicolaslanzoni9385 Год назад +1

      Well , auctions must have changed a lot since then , because the atmosphere of the auctions shown in the video are just depressing. Every bidder shown in the video appears to be a empty husk of a person, completely devoid of any joy , they barely move their arms to signal for a bid, is like they are trying to do the least amount of movement necessary to be noticeable by the auctioneer, as if they are ashamed of doing so . The regret in the air is palpable, and I don't understand why... They stay like this all the time, even before placing a bid , what are they regretting???
      You should consider yourself lucky , if you got caught up in the atmosphere shown in the video, buying an overpriced bovine would be the least of your problems lol

  • @iwatchvideos1
    @iwatchvideos1 6 лет назад +30

    0:03 oh my god, the hair. ON ALL OF THEM

    • @TheHomelander1234
      @TheHomelander1234 3 года назад

      Their all amish

    • @jessicas7482
      @jessicas7482 3 года назад +4

      @@TheHomelander1234 honestly the haircuts and their faces scream inbred to me. I don't want to offend anyone but it is a known fact that within the Amish community there is a genetic bottleneck.

  • @DiscoCatsMeow
    @DiscoCatsMeow 5 лет назад +83

    5:48 I will buy whatever he is selling.

    • @ninenko809
      @ninenko809 5 лет назад +6

      I agree.

    • @judequalls8197
      @judequalls8197 4 года назад +7

      That man could sell me my own right boot

    • @schnozz87
      @schnozz87 4 года назад +9

      Best hat: check. Deepest voice: check. Yeah he could sell me a left handed screwdriver.

  • @Alex-px9oy
    @Alex-px9oy 5 лет назад +30

    3:32 That *IS* Bill Gates, is it not?

    • @jibrankhantareen7300
      @jibrankhantareen7300 5 лет назад +3

      No bruh the computer industry pays more than the farming business

    • @Topic_____542
      @Topic_____542 3 года назад

      Everybody has to have a hobbby

    • @herisuryadi6885
      @herisuryadi6885 5 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@jibrankhantareen7300although iirc Bill Gates do own some farmland

  • @lunhing5308
    @lunhing5308 6 лет назад +87

    Damn real interesting make more stuff like this vice

    • @VR-fd8qs
      @VR-fd8qs 6 лет назад +7

      Lun Hing naahh we gonna make some gay shit cuz we think that's what people want