Yeah, Chad! Bonus points for setting your audio levels perfect between music & voice. No need to turn down blaring rock music between voice segments--hooray! As always, great video with valuable info. Everybody could learn a thing or three from you ;-) Best, @HoneyOnWales
In 2013 I cut 5 slabs 5 inches thick for a friend from a freshly fallen sycamore. Sycamore is notorious for going its own way as it dries, especially if it is slabbed thin as it dries, hence the reason for the slabs being so thick. The fellow I slabbed this for used a brace and very auger long bit to auger threw from side to side then drove 1" dowels into the auger holes. After which he slathered on many coats of latex paint. In the spring of 2019 he started breaking down one of the slabs, end cracks were non existent and the slabs had not cupped, there was minimal twist. He said that is how his grandfather had done it for years.
trimming back things like that key are the perfect reason to drag out the multitool my wife bought me one year. only thing i have found it useful for lol
As useful as lovely method to stop the cracks. Sometimes, the old methods are always the better ones. Chad, I'd like to know the sizes of a dovetail key ( H, W, L ) one should use in proportion to the/a board. Thanks and all my best. Giuliano, Italy.
Just say no to crack......good vid. My noob self cut down a tree planed my wood started building...everything looked beautiful till next morning.......crack city
At least we have a fix for the cracks. It's a pain in the proverbial when you get a nice figured board and a crack develops. the Bow ties can add an attractive feature
Very impressive. I make 48cm wooden chesspieces. Out of wet logs. They dry up and crack in my apartment. I'm experimenting with not letting them dry before I apply wood glue on them. Which turns transparent. But if I forget it takes about three days before they crack. Ive herd 'beout ppl wetting minor wooden pieces made for fishing and then painting them. Then put hooks on them. I guess oil might prevent the endgrain from drying so fast. It appears to me as if the watersoluable wood glue can be applied after the oil. The wood simply consumes so much fluid.
I've been looking to buy a Kung Fu wooden dummy and cracking of the wooden post seems to be a big problem with some of them. I'm not sure what they coat that center wooden post with but could keeping that main body "oiled" reduce or eliminate that cracking. Moisture (water) evaporates quicker than a linseed oil so would that help prevent cracking?
Have you tried as an alternative to use a oscillating tool to clean up the edges? I'm seeing the introduction of an oscillating tool for assorted applications in detailed work and thought I'd ask.
Shouldn't the butterfly be a bit shorter than the mortise? If the would continues to shrink it will induce extra stress and possibly new cracks will start.
I had a piece of black walnut cut 13" x 36" x 1.25" for a counter top on a small cabinet. Within a couple of days it started splitting. if I oil it will it close up. I was going to put polyurethane on it but was afraid to after it started spliting.
Unfortunately in my experience it will not close up with oil on it. It probably wasn’t completely dry when it was cut and milled. The moisture leaving made it shrink and crack. Try to make the crack a feature and not a flaw.
I work with sections of fresh Branches, usually about 3 in' x 6 in'. (Art). They start splitting a day or two after they've been cut, how would you recommend i store them when I'm not working on them. "Please and thankyou"
Thanks for this tip! I just got some old growth 8/4 white oak boards which I’m drying (currently has 12-15% moisture). Would this be too wet to add the dove tails?
12-15% is normal in my area. I wouldn't expect too much more splitting on your board, but I put them in because a change in season will make it more. It may not get longer, but it will open and close.
Thanks Chad. Here is a question. Can we try this on a cracked bamboo pole. I know it's not straight forward, because bamboo would have a curved surface; but is it possible to cut a curved depth cut some how. If so, then a curved bamboo butterfly piece can be fitted in to it. What do you think?
I bought new lumber to make my tabletop and I don't feel comfortable to chisel and router out a butterfly hole. What are my options as a beginner and do I necessary have to do anything to my wood prior to crafting? thanks
Hey, You could use epoxy to fill out cracks as well, as it stabilizes the wood. Just make sure you don't pour the epoxy "through" the crack if it has an opening on the bottom. Make sure there are no leaks with lots of electrical tape, for example. Assuming your lumber is dry for furniture, you would need to plane your boards to the same thickness and joint the edges if you're gluing multiple boards together. Hope this helps!
But, how do you know it fits!?! I noticed you marked the hole with a PENCIL, not a knife or chisel. I really like your video, and I need a way to stop cracks in my fresh-cut sweet gum panels. They are 1"x20"x22" and if they split, I might as well not have cut them.
Anchor seal 2 can be applied to the end grain to help seal the wood from absorbing more moisture. I've also used shellac and primer. Just depends on the project.
Walker Industries with multiple facilities in the USA and Canada have Aqua Seal at less than half the cost of Anchor Seal. 1 gallon, 5 gallon, 55 gallon, tanker car, cheaper the larger lot. I picked up 2 5 gallon buckets today. I formerly saw Associated Chemists in threads, now Walker Industries, @t .
I am very new to this fun hobby. Let's say I was making a table top out of one massive slab of wood and it had no cracks yet. What if I was to inlay some massive bowties that stretched across the width of the slab (on the underside of course) every foot or so down the length of it? Or inlay and screw steel plates in a similar manner. Or, if the table is deep enough, run a metal band around the outside edge (like a ring on a finger) if it looked cool. This obviously would do nothing for preventing cracks from forming on the top, but would it prevent future cracks from beginning anywhere on the bottom? Thanks for the great video!
The cracks form as a result of the moisture content in the wood. The moisture content will always fluctuate depending on the humidity. However, ultimately it will even out. idea moisture content is between 6-9% yet anything under 15%, in my opinion, will be adequate for a tabletop and should not crack anymore
Thank you Chad that was very informative and useful. Here is a question. How to cut holes, say2 3/8 inches, without buying the expensive Fostner bits? Thanks
If I used the butterfly technique I also would fill the cracks with fine sawdust and glue afterwards, but sometime later. The butterfly looks so unnatural with the grain of the wood.
Save your money on sealing products, they are expensive and they do not stop cracking. Sometimes they may reduce it a little bit but usually there is no noticeable difference from untreated logs/boards.
Did you test fit the butterfly at all before you glued it? I could just see myself having a non-fitting butterfly, now coated with glue... Did you not seal the end grain because you wanted to get a split so you could make this video? If you think the wood isn't dry, you should just throw something on there. Even latex paint will work.
Great question. It will cause the whole board to expand the full width of the board. If the board can’t expand a different weak spot and crack will occur.
sound advice... how would you think about making those butterflies out of metal and maybe screwing them on ? although I doubt it, it could work... whaddya say ? :-/
Dear Chad, I wonder IF I press the sides to force the crack to 'close' and just then dig the hole for the tie, will make a better looking job. Any thoughts? Many thanks.
it is worth a try but is unlikely - remember old civilizations used wood wedges like this to crack boulders thanks to the expansion and contraction being so strong
Without the butterfly you could use the wood right uo to the crack. Now you probably throw out and waste the wood with the butterfly unless your plan is to build something rustic?
I think I would have tried a little different procedure or approach. I would have drilled a hole through the board across grain from the side edges, centered, This would be to accept a threaded screw, Then counter sink a hole where I could put the nuts an washers on to tighten this piece, You might have even closed these cracks, Then one could put plugs over the remaining holes instead of having that ugly piece of butterfly wood showing on the top. This procedure would apply even pressure on the board an possibly not allowed it to warp, where I think that butterfly may allow this to happen, or even clamping it with very strong clamps, not the usual wood working clamps as mentioned below.
YOu make a good point. BUt the butterfly was going to be on the bottom side. Sometime i like to have a butterfly showing but on this piece i think it will take away from the beauty of the grain. Thanks for your comment!
1:10 It's not drying out because air is going into the end grain. It's drying out because moisture is coming out. If the moisture does not go out, air would not be able to get in.
Bowties. That's how I know them, but I guess butterfly works too. I'd rather go epoxy though, I hate the look of bowties. I'd rather just seal coat clear, then pour into it and sand it to whatever luster I want.
I understand your point. In traditional furniture the butterfly was put on the bottom to be out of sight. Unfortunately epoxy will fill the crack but it will not stop it from cracking more. The butterfly will.
One trick I have seen for a tight looking dovetail key is to mushroom it with a hammer before planing it all the way down. This fills in the tiny gaps left by slightly less than perfect chiseling.
The board cracks from the ends because of cellular orientation of the wood, and water evaporates from open cell pores faster than across cell walls; NOT because the end of the board is coarse.
I can agree with some of what you say, I placed my butterfly keys on the bottom so it doesn't take away from the beauty of the wood. What is the solution then for stopping the cracks form getting bigger is that is not the fix?
Two and a half minutes to get to the point! Prep a script, edit in half and get to the point of your vid. Drop the goofy stuff (not that cute) use some more screen graphics to move through the supporting observations. With "Wood$Crap" as your sponsor, I won't be subscribing, either! I know you gotta eat, but pointing your viewers to that franchise rip-off should embarrass you.
S2: Perhaps Chad's area of expertise is more oriented towards sharing woodworking knowledge than it is identifying or alleviating whatever seems to be stressing you out.
s2s: Leaving comments that identify you as a died-in-the-wool rectum should embarrass *you*. If you're so wise, make a better video as an example to others.
It’s always very impressive to see the amount of patience it takes to do this kind of work with hand tools
thank you for speaking slowly and clearly so I can understand English.
That is so funny, I played it at 2x speed and would have liked 2.5x
Yeah, Chad! Bonus points for setting your audio levels perfect between music & voice. No need to turn down blaring rock music between voice segments--hooray! As always, great video with valuable info. Everybody could learn a thing or three from you ;-) Best, @HoneyOnWales
A year after you posted this and it was a fix I was looking for.
Thank you
In 2013 I cut 5 slabs 5 inches thick for a friend from a freshly fallen sycamore. Sycamore is notorious for going its own way as it dries, especially if it is slabbed thin as it dries, hence the reason for the slabs being so thick. The fellow I slabbed this for used a brace and very auger long bit to auger threw from side to side then drove 1" dowels into the auger holes. After which he slathered on many coats of latex paint. In the spring of 2019 he started breaking down one of the slabs, end cracks were non existent and the slabs had not cupped, there was minimal twist. He said that is how his grandfather had done it for years.
So basically the dowel is across the grain (radial would be a better term I guess; not sure) and then you seal only the ends ?
trimming back things like that key are the perfect reason to drag out the multitool my wife bought me one year. only thing i have found it useful for lol
What would be the minimum thickness you would use this on? Thanks in advance.
As useful as lovely method to stop the cracks. Sometimes, the old methods are always the better ones. Chad, I'd like to know the sizes of a dovetail key ( H, W, L ) one should use in proportion to the/a board. Thanks and all my best. Giuliano, Italy.
Just say no to crack......good vid. My noob self cut down a tree planed my wood started building...everything looked beautiful till next morning.......crack city
Hi Chad....what would the dimensions of the dovetail key be for a piece of 2X? Say a 2 x 10. thanks!
At least we have a fix for the cracks. It's a pain in the proverbial when you get a nice figured board and a crack develops. the Bow ties can add an attractive feature
Very impressive. I make 48cm wooden chesspieces. Out of wet logs. They dry up and crack in my apartment. I'm experimenting with not letting them dry before I apply wood glue on them. Which turns transparent. But if I forget it takes about three days before they crack. Ive herd 'beout ppl wetting minor wooden pieces made for fishing and then painting them. Then put hooks on them. I guess oil might prevent the endgrain from drying so fast. It appears to me as if the watersoluable wood glue can be applied after the oil. The wood simply consumes so much fluid.
Thanks. I learned something new today. What would you use to fill in the cracks?
What about a 1 inch thick board with a crack?
I use dovetail keys on any size board
I've been looking to buy a Kung Fu wooden dummy and cracking of the wooden post seems to be a big problem with some of them. I'm not sure what they coat that center wooden post with but could keeping that main body "oiled" reduce or eliminate that cracking. Moisture (water) evaporates quicker than a linseed oil so would that help prevent cracking?
Nice tip. You forgot to mention that grain direction of the key is across the grain of the board.
Excellent point. Thank you
Have you tried as an alternative to use a oscillating tool to clean up the edges? I'm seeing the introduction of an oscillating tool for assorted applications in detailed work and thought I'd ask.
I'm thinkin' this may help my brother...he's a plumber..
underrated comment
That’s gold, Jerry! GOLD!
Terrific, but what if the cracking runs on the horizontal and not the vertical?
I've seen this before but I didnt understand why til now, thanks lol
What an amazing video to watch. I am só envious of your skills!
Shouldn't the butterfly be a bit shorter than the mortise? If the would continues to shrink it will induce extra stress and possibly new cracks will start.
I wanted the key below the crack the crack was deepest on the end. Where i routed at i was down to solid wood again.
Would you tighten down some clamps across the piece to keep it from being able to spread and crack?
Aren't they called shakes? The finished key looks very rustic and appealing too. iGreat vid.
Hi Chad
If I have a piece of wood which isn't cracked yet and I put some varnish on it. That will protect my product from cracking?
It will help. Depending on the moisture in the wood is what will cause it to crack as it dries. If you are under 14% I believe you will be safe.
@@ChadStanton Thanks a lot. You're great ☺
Nice video. Always appreciate the bowtie inlays!
Thank you Bennett for taking the time to watch and to comment
I had a piece of black walnut cut 13" x 36" x 1.25" for a counter top on a small cabinet. Within a couple of days it started splitting. if I oil it will it close up. I was going to put polyurethane on it but was afraid to after it started spliting.
Unfortunately in my experience it will not close up with oil on it. It probably wasn’t completely dry when it was cut and milled. The moisture leaving made it shrink and crack.
Try to make the crack a feature and not a flaw.
I work with sections of fresh Branches, usually about 3 in' x 6 in'. (Art).
They start splitting a day or two after they've been cut, how would you recommend i store them when I'm not working on them.
"Please and thankyou"
is this tie on the to-be-top side or is it ok to keep that underneath? good info though, cheers!
Good question. Historically it was hidden underneath. But today many people will show it as a feature. So whichever you prefer. Thanks for watching
Superb mate, thank you. 😎🇬🇧💪
Thanks for this tip! I just got some old growth 8/4 white oak boards which I’m drying (currently has 12-15% moisture). Would this be too wet to add the dove tails?
12-15% is normal in my area. I wouldn't expect too much more splitting on your board, but I put them in because a change in season will make it more. It may not get longer, but it will open and close.
Thanks Chad. Here is a question. Can we try this on a cracked bamboo pole. I know it's not straight forward, because bamboo would have a curved surface; but is it possible to cut a curved depth cut some how. If so, then a curved bamboo butterfly piece can be fitted in to it. What do you think?
Okey simple and nice
I bought new lumber to make my tabletop and I don't feel comfortable to chisel and router out a butterfly hole. What are my options as a beginner and do I necessary have to do anything to my wood prior to crafting? thanks
Hey,
You could use epoxy to fill out cracks as well, as it stabilizes the wood. Just make sure you don't pour the epoxy "through" the crack if it has an opening on the bottom. Make sure there are no leaks with lots of electrical tape, for example.
Assuming your lumber is dry for furniture, you would need to plane your boards to the same thickness and joint the edges if you're gluing multiple boards together.
Hope this helps!
HI I like the video and details for repair break wood best regards
Thank you very much!
But, how do you know it fits!?! I noticed you marked the hole with a PENCIL, not a knife or chisel. I really like your video, and I need a way to stop cracks in my fresh-cut sweet gum panels. They are 1"x20"x22" and if they split, I might as well not have cut them.
thnx, well done. I'm gonna try it.
May IO ask what do you use to protect a finished wood carving, so it will not get cracks?
Anchor seal 2 can be applied to the end grain to help seal the wood from absorbing more moisture. I've also used shellac and primer. Just depends on the project.
Pretty cool. Nice job.
Very good Chad! Thank you.
Thank you Robert. I appreciate you watching and taking the time to comment
Walker Industries with multiple facilities in the USA and Canada have Aqua Seal at less than half the cost of Anchor Seal. 1 gallon, 5 gallon, 55 gallon, tanker car, cheaper the larger lot. I picked up 2 5 gallon buckets today. I formerly saw Associated Chemists in threads, now Walker Industries, @t .
I am very new to this fun hobby. Let's say I was making a table top out of one massive slab of wood and it had no cracks yet. What if I was to inlay some massive bowties that stretched across the width of the slab (on the underside of course) every foot or so down the length of it? Or inlay and screw steel plates in a similar manner. Or, if the table is deep enough, run a metal band around the outside edge (like a ring on a finger) if it looked cool. This obviously would do nothing for preventing cracks from forming on the top, but would it prevent future cracks from beginning anywhere on the bottom? Thanks for the great video!
The cracks form as a result of the moisture content in the wood. The moisture content will always fluctuate depending on the humidity. However, ultimately it will even out. idea moisture content is between 6-9% yet anything under 15%, in my opinion, will be adequate for a tabletop and should not crack anymore
Thank you Chad that was very informative and useful. Here is a question. How to cut holes, say2 3/8 inches, without buying the expensive Fostner bits? Thanks
A hole saw bit can do that. And it's rather inexpensive
If I used the butterfly technique I also would fill the cracks with fine sawdust and glue afterwards, but sometime later. The butterfly looks so unnatural with the grain of the wood.
Save your money on sealing products, they are expensive and they do not stop cracking. Sometimes they may reduce it a little bit but usually there is no noticeable difference from untreated logs/boards.
THANKS CHAD!
Thank you Mike!
Excellent demonstration video Chad. Thanks.
Don my friend, as always thank you for your support. Hope you are doing well
Chad Stanton I’m doing well. Thanks for your comment. Hope all is well with you and your family.
Why didn't you place the dove tail key a bit closer to the edge?
I typically try to put the dovetail key in the middle of the crack
Did you test fit the butterfly at all before you glued it? I could just see myself having a non-fitting butterfly, now coated with glue... Did you not seal the end grain because you wanted to get a split so you could make this video? If you think the wood isn't dry, you should just throw something on there. Even latex paint will work.
Thanks chad that helps
Glad to do my part.
will the stress move to expansion outside of bowtie?
Great question. It will cause the whole board to expand the full width of the board. If the board can’t expand a different weak spot and crack will occur.
Always interesting!!
Thank's!!!
Thank you for taking the time to watch and to comment. It means a lot to me
Looked like a perfect fit.
Honestly it was a good fit, but the second one came out better. All in all, it will stop the checking
So all cracks have to have this or they may crack with time?
If the wood has a high moisture content, as it dries it will crack. Once the majority of the moisture is gone, it will not split anymore.
Nice thanks Chad
Thanks for watching Ken
sound advice... how would you think about making those butterflies out of metal and maybe screwing them on ? although I doubt it, it could work... whaddya say ? :-/
And how do you work on the piece afterwards?
@@MarcosElMalo2 change the cutting edge of of the planer from 25 to 70 degrees, lol
just put a nice coat of linseed oil on the outer 5 inches of that plank.
Mineral oil will close cracks.
Dear Chad, I wonder IF I press the sides to force the crack to 'close' and just then dig the hole for the tie, will make a better looking job. Any thoughts?
Many thanks.
I think you are correct i do believe it would help make the crack disappear
If you are lucky enough to get enough force to close it and put a key in that is best. But in my case, that wasn't going to happen
it is worth a try but is unlikely - remember old civilizations used wood wedges like this to crack boulders thanks to the expansion and contraction being so strong
Without the butterfly you could use the wood right uo to the crack. Now you probably throw out and waste the wood with the butterfly unless your plan is to build something rustic?
Screw them up together with bolts.
I think I would have tried a little different procedure or approach.
I would have drilled a hole through the board across grain from the side edges, centered,
This would be to accept a threaded screw, Then counter sink a hole where I could put the nuts an washers on to tighten this piece, You might have even closed these cracks, Then one could put plugs over the remaining holes instead of having that ugly piece of butterfly
wood showing on the top. This procedure would apply even pressure on the board an possibly not allowed it to warp, where I think that butterfly may allow this to happen, or even clamping it with very strong clamps, not the usual wood working clamps as mentioned below.
Seems like a good idea. I guess it depends on what you are going to use the timber for. For example you might only need one side to look good.
YOu make a good point. BUt the butterfly was going to be on the bottom side. Sometime i like to have a butterfly showing but on this piece i think it will take away from the beauty of the grain. Thanks for your comment!
Yeah but how do we stop cracks from forming to start with.
A good way to prevent cracks from forming in wood is predrilling.
thank man!!!!
Hi Chad, the cracks are beautiful but they walk without asking permission 😂😂
1:10 It's not drying out because air is going into the end grain. It's drying out because moisture is coming out. If the moisture does not go out, air would not be able to get in.
Chad - will you use any epoxy or super glue on the remaining part of the crack.
On the bottom side, no. But i will on the top to fill the void to make it smooth
i've seen where people have hammered in these Z shaped clips to hold stuff like that together
Wish we lived close enuff that I could get saftey Dan's old job
That was interesting
Wow !! Nice
Thank you so much
Bowties. That's how I know them, but I guess butterfly works too. I'd rather go epoxy though, I hate the look of bowties. I'd rather just seal coat clear, then pour into it and sand it to whatever luster I want.
I understand your point. In traditional furniture the butterfly was put on the bottom to be out of sight. Unfortunately epoxy will fill the crack but it will not stop it from cracking more. The butterfly will.
Oh yeah!!
When does it take 2 minutes and 40 seconds to get to the point?
Oh I forgot to tell you. At 2 minutes 40 seconds you get the point. 😁 Thanks for watching.
Thank you Chad, really helpful for a(74 year old) noob like me
Chad, good vid! Do you always use Gorilla Wood glue? If you have a glue video point me there.
I do prefer it, but i also use Titebond as well
Thanks,Chad!!
nice boards chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad
Also known as a bowtie or Dutchman.
Dutchman. That's a new one for me. Thank you
Ya.
That's not what I wanted to hear. Ya, I know about butterflies. I thought you had some magic potion. Disappointed but you have a good day RC
I can appreciate your point. YOu have a good day too. Thank you
Sweet....
What’s going on with Safety Dan?
I moved and he can not make the time to visit for the show.
One trick I have seen for a tight looking dovetail key is to mushroom it with a hammer before planing it all the way down. This fills in the tiny gaps left by slightly less than perfect chiseling.
This might stop them in their Cracks instead of tracks lol
how about closing the crack?
But where is safety Dan?
He hasn't been in the show for almost a year. I moved and he's across town. But he is doing well. I'll tell him you said "hey"
I was expecting more wood & cracks jokes...
That wood have been nice.. they always crack me up
The board cracks from the ends because of cellular orientation of the wood, and water evaporates from open cell pores faster than across cell walls; NOT because the end of the board is coarse.
He said pores not coarse.
Began watching, but this would not help me with a whole hemlock shed
Greetings from Russia!!!🇷🇺
HELLO Russia! Thanks for watching
Not to knock the technique... i just dont think this is a viable option to fix my porch and steps that are cracking
Keep us posted on that chief.
Dunparrow ok so i used a pump up spray bottle and some Thompson’s water seal and sprayed the bejesus out of it.... stopped all the crackin
👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻😍😍😍💡💡
Cartoon face guy 🤣
Come on dude there's 1 million of these videos on here!!!!
Crack is whack
Hahahaha
Crack is bad mkay
stop those cracks in their tracks....... funny very funny, can't stop laughing.. ho ho ho ho lol lol lol ..
The creepiest guy on RUclips. He sounds like an aquaphibian from Stingray ......
Wait until you hear me sing :-)
@@ChadStanton no offence intended, buddy. Your butterfly crack fix is absolutely great. Greetings from over the pond.
@@KevinBower-gy5be Thank you Kevin. Honestly I hate hearing my own voice. Now i know others do too. Hahaha Have a good day!
You can turn off the volume. I can figure out his method without hearing him.
@@nancywebb6549 That's good to know Nancy. My wife wishes she could do that to me :-)
not even close to practical...
I can appreciate your difference in opinion. Would you mind telling what you would suggest?
Butterfly pieces are not a fix. They look like crap in some pieces, better I some species
I can agree with some of what you say, I placed my butterfly keys on the bottom so it doesn't take away from the beauty of the wood. What is the solution then for stopping the cracks form getting bigger is that is not the fix?
Not a fix? Can’t wait to hear your solution to the issue. I looked for your videos showing the “correct” way.
Two and a half minutes to get to the point! Prep a script, edit in half and get to the point of your vid. Drop the goofy stuff (not that cute) use some more screen graphics to move through the supporting observations. With "Wood$Crap" as your sponsor, I won't be subscribing, either! I know you gotta eat, but pointing your viewers to that franchise rip-off should embarrass you.
S2: Perhaps Chad's area of expertise is more oriented towards sharing woodworking knowledge than it is identifying or alleviating whatever seems to be stressing you out.
s2s: Leaving comments that identify you as a died-in-the-wool rectum should embarrass *you*. If you're so wise, make a better video as an example to others.