Can you imagine when the writers wrote "The stranger" and thought, "Just wait until episode 8 of season 2 when they find out it's actually, Gandalf!" And from the first moment he appeared on screen, reviews called him Gandalf 😂
Generations from now, people will still be enchanted by J.R.R. Tolkien's books. Amazon's fiasco will be largely forgotten, it will be vaguely remembered only as a colossal costly failure!
@@DarkHourYT It will be forgotten, my dude. Do you remember the shows that used to be HUGE back in the 80s and the 90s, hell even the 2000s? Most of them are all but forgotten already. Only those who grew up with them have watched them. It's very likely that this show will get swept under the rug and forgotten to history in a few years.
@@drkushajagadeesh6347 in fairness if you couldn't tell from my extremely diverse cutaway clip selections I often remembers a most things I've watched but I get you
@@DarkHourYT He meant largely forgotten not ‘forgotten’ how it is sometimes used: where as long as there is one human alive that remembers, or it is written somewhere, it is not lost.
Counterweight Trebuchet effective range - 300-400 metres. Rings of Power - Judging by the orcs' position in relation to the bridge which lies between them and the mountain, they appear to be several miles away from the target. Not only do they still hit it with sufficient force to smash a mountain, but they hit it half-way up the mountain-side. If I didn't know better, I'd say the writers didn't have a clue what they were doing. Oh wait ...
300-400m is quite optimistic, perhaps some massive trebuchet, although at that range it couldn't hit anything with precision, I mean it's a stone not guided projectile. These orcish 'trebuchets' are relatively small, a hybrid between a trebuchet and a classical catapult, realistically these things can't probably reach 100-150m if they could work at all, especially because they don't have a sling but a bucket. The best case scenario - hurl a few rocks on the wall and into the city, with no significant damage. Maybe if they keep bombarding the city for months and months... mountain? haha
Dude, why you switching from metric to imperial? It was like 10-15km (MINIMUM). That's like a guy throwing a football completely over the length of a professional football stadium.
Judging by how slowly the trebuchets move i would say they could barely move the rocks 50m. Also technically not a trebuchet but some weird catapult hybrid
@@brianfewer919 Because I'm British and we use both, but crucially because a net search gave me the range of a trebuchet in metric, and I couldn't be bothered converting it for people. To correct that: "Siege engine in show has comically impossible range."
😊 Nice. Thanks for watching this, so I didn't have to. The Balrog does look amazing, but it's hard to mess up the incredible design created by Jackson and his team.
@marckhachfe1238 if you're shocked by that, you should see what else is in the show. The entire thing is loosely ripped off of Jackson's trilogy, while they make up a bunch of dumb characters to pollute the lore even more!
Wait...where did the water go? Did they really write that they dropped a dam, which is just rocks stacked and not a solid wall, and that the water just disappears after that, like pulling the plug on a bathtub? LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
And that nice solid road way across the river bed, ready to roll the wagons and engines across, the thousands of troops, the cavalry without anyone getting mired down or it turning into a mud pit. And then the water will break though in a unknown place and cut you off mid crossing.
@@TheSuperappelflap That was an engineered reservoir, like Lake Mead. You predetermine where the overflow goes, and since Sauroman isn't an idiot they would have dug canals to divert it away from Isengard. That's different than just winging rocks at a mountain and expecting an effective dam to construct itself.
I’m not really seeing how continuing the charge would have been a bad thing. The cage with Galadriel in it as right at the front and as close as they got before stopping, I’m fairly sure that if they’d just kept going they would have quickly rolled over the orcs and swarmed around the cage. Securing her release in the process. At least based on how a fantasy cavalry charge usually works anyway. But in stopping they probably caused countless more elves to die. Just some more red in Galadriel’s ledger I guess.
We need to put something to bed here. The theory of the "toxic Fandom"... there is no such thing. If you like something, you're a fan... if not, you aren't a fan. It's like being a friendly enemy. It's an oxymoron. Only something the left could come up with to shift the blame. I'm not toxic, I'm just not a fan of this show.
Toxic fandom exists! There are some folks who harbour an irrational hatred towards this series! On multiple levels! And then there are others (like me!) who simply don't like this show, but can reasonably articulate why. And can even stomach the idea that others might like this show, since that is THEIR choice! Not mine! So... Like Everything Else, there is a Spectrum! Try not to simplify the un-simplyfiable! Because it won't work! 😊
@@sdwone if you don't like the show, then you by definition are NOT a fan. You people have totally missed the point. "Toxic fans" is a bullshit term made by people with no accountability.
@@sdwone and I could give a damn what anyone else likes. We actual Tolkien fans don't like this show because it's dumb, cannon breaking. Badly acted, and extremely poorly thought out. And everyone who reviews it all have very intelligent arguments why it's bad. It's not irrational to hate something that's terrible. And if you can't understand that, then it's your problem, not mine. If you like mindless entertainment, more power to you. But tear down other people's opinions because you don't understand the criticism.
Thank you for 'seeing what I haven't seen'. The clip at 12:30 where Galadridum walks in from the secret passage is the perfect example of how most of the acting is that of a school play.
Whoever wrote the scripts was like "I cannot brain today, me has the dumb... but I'll write it anyway!", and every director was like "It's shitposting time!", while Amazon's like "Its Magnum Opus time!"
Yeah - buckets don't work - I know bc for my sons final year science project we made a 25% size trebuchet and managed to hurl a coke bottle 150 meters! (Till the police arrived and asked us if we had a license for the weapon... science project. They let us take the photos and measurements and then we had to pack it away... I think they were amused but there is always some Karen out there to complain... My son got an 'A'!)
Kudo for suffering through this. 100 years from now people will still talk about Tolkien and enjoy his books. No one will care about this show a month after it's cancelled.
They just forgot they ran Blah-golas through from one script to the other ... People were paid a stupid amount of money to write this, which is the single most depressing part. Thank god we have a case of DH Distiliery's black-label moonshine on hand for just such an occasion.
My good friends Johnny Walker and Jack Daniels supported me greatly through the first season of this show. Unfortunately, even they couldnt help me get past episode 3 of this season.
The way they illustrated Sauron manipulating Celebrimbor really bothered me. I understand the writers were trying to show us Sauron had the power to alter people's reality which, to a lesser writer sounds reasonable for a character that's manipulative and deceptive. But what they failed to realize is how much scarier it is when Sauron doesn't HAVE to alter your reality to convince you to do what he wants. It's a cool power, sure, to be able to create elaborate illusions to trick someone into doing your bidding unwillingly. But it's soooo much scarier when someone can simply use what's already in your mind to convince you you WANT to do it. Saurons greatest power has always been his ability to bend others to his will, and it's fundamental to not only his character but to the history of Middle Earth. It would be far more interesting, and logical, for Sauron to prey on Celebrimbors own insecurities and weaknesses to convince him he wanted to craft all the rings, which would also ensure that the smith gives it his all. They started the thing this way, but somewhere along the way they dropped it in favor of Sauron just making stupid magic illusions. It would have been far more compelling if Celebrimbor had been a willing assistant in the forging of the rings, the way he was in the books, with Sauron only having to amplify the traits already in Celebrimbors heart and mind. It would have been so much more of a tragic end as well, if Celebrimbor had never even suspected he was doing something wrong, until the very end when Sauron shows up to take the rings and his entire perspective comes crashing down around him as he's betrayed and butchered by someone he thought of as a peer and mentor. They convolute and water down so much good lore, it's absolutely insufferable. Especially since these are not difficult concepts to grasp in the first place...
One reason i DO NOT want RoP to die is because i love so much hate watching videos of mofos tearing this b.s show to shreds. Its like a guilty pleasure to me now, and there's dozens of new RUclips channels that were built shitting on this awful show and I'm there for all of it! I love it! So please amazon, keep making this trash fire and throwing money away, and if you cancel this show...give that money to your warehouse workers and drivers!
I actually kinda want them to make all 5 Seasons. Don't get me wrong, it's not because it's good- quite the opposite! I wanted them to cancel it until I realize just how much hilarious side content that comes out of these otherwise terrible Shows. The same goes with Star Wars- keep making it all bad so folks like you, Charlie Hopkins and all the other Independent creators can keep on entertaining me by teasing the crap out of these Shows. If you haven't heard of Charlie Hopkins, check his stuff out- the dude is hella-talented and brilliantly hilarious! He can emulate almost anyone's voice, then he dresses up like the Characters he plays (he plays them all) and adds a small bit of AI to give the Characters he plays their proper face- it's quite convincing. His Tom Bombidil cracks me up to no end. He mostly does Tolkein/Star Wars stuff, but he also does stand-up and other stuff as well. Nice vid either way! If they cancel it I will be happy, if they don't I will be happy since we're garaunteed more great side content, just like this! It's sort of a no-lose situation for me! And I'm a pessimist, so it's kinda odd that I'm so optimistic about this :P
Catapults should have been switched to trebuchets because as a more morden invention, it had a wider range of damage, and could launch heavier loads. Those that were featured in the series are catapults ( with the bucket) that can launch the load weighted from 25 to 40 pounds, while trebuts could launch boulders weighted from 440 to 660 pounds. I doubt those catapults should be able to launch such a heavy load and at such a distance .
Celebimbo: “Look, Smellrond, the dork army is attacking! What should we do?” Smellrond: “We need expert battle plans…fetch the mentally challenged toddlers!” Cue suspenseful kazoo music…
Wow, I thought it was over too. Every review I've listened to has made it seem that way. Guess everyone us in denial. Randomly popped up in my feed, good stuff 👍
It used to be that you could watch all the truely dire tv shows on "insert stick". This show is so bad no one has bothered to restream it. I feel blessed you sound like your eyes hurt.
In your intro, "Evil cannot create anything new, they can only corrupt and ruin what good forces have invented or made." is not a quote from J.R.R. Tolkien; it is a quote from lots of RUclips commenters, ironically quoting each other (rather than creating anything new).
It is from Return of the King: "No, they eat and drink, Sam. The Shadow that bred them can only mock, it cannot make: not real new things of its own. I don't think it gave life to the orcs, it only ruined them and twisted them;"
Yeah, it's more of a paraphrase from a part in RotK. What's hilarious is in the behind the scenes thing, the actor who plays Gilga-Daddy quotes the *paraphrase* which is hilarious and means he must have read the comments of people paraphrasing that quote to shit on the show. 😂 And called it his "favorite quote"! But somehow didn't realize it's about them and their stupid show.
Elrond and Galadriel kissing... Let's take a look on Elrond's family: he is son of Earendil, who is son of Idril, who is the daughter of Turgon, who is the son of Fingolfin, who is the brother of Finarfin, who is the father of... oh, look! Galadriel!
This is, frankly, a really dumb argument. Remember, he marries her daughter later anyway. If we lived thousands of years this isn't something we'd care about that much, that's still significantly far enough apart on the family tree to be of any concern and most elves are undoubtedly related in some way because elves don't have that many children and don't die. Hell, first cousins are accepted in many parts of the world even today, and were throughout most of human history. The problem is how elven mating works, which is once and permanent, not even "death" can break the bond because elves are reborn. Therefore, Galadriel for all intents and purposes is still married to Celeborn even if he did die (of which the show does not depict).
One of the powers of elves is they can choose to die physically so that they can reincarnate into a healthy body. Now maybe sorcery can force him to stay alive, and i'd buy it if morgoth was involved, but I just don't see Sauron before the ring as being anywhere near that powerful.
No, Tolkien did not once say that evil can not create anything new and that it can only destroy. That's just a paraphrasing from what Frodo said in one of the books.
@@br9809 There is a very big difference between someone saying something himself and someone writing a line for a character in a book. What Sam said in the book reflects Tolkien's view on evil, which is Catholic. But to say "as Tolkien once said" is just a false statement.
Well cavalry can be for direct assault. Heavy cavalry, with lances. You can also charge an enemy line with standard cavalry, and frequently break it just by psychological intimidation, unless he troops are well trained and disciplined and understand that if the line breaks at all, they are screwed. You can't charge a line that stays intact, you have to break off if you can't get any of them to run. If any of them _do_ run, you have an opening and can get in to attack from behind, which is why if any part of the line panics, the rest will often disintegrate, because it's hopeless to stand after the first guys ran. That's why they developed the square, to prevent that from happening, so the army was broken into self sufficient units that each had to be broken, which could defend in all directions, and which could reinforce and consolidate more easily. But yes, calvary is useless against an intact line. Almost all casualties come from after the line breaks and the men are cut down fleeing in a mob. Horses can't and won't just crash into a solid line of men, and it would just be a disaster if you tried. Armored knights sort of could by using lances to help break up the line, and the formation was usually not well disciplined at that time anyway, so they could expect to terrorize the troops into breaking halls in the line when they saw the line of armored tanks on huge horses pounding directly at them. Then they can use their armor and momentum to drive wedges into the line and break it up more for the rest of the knights to attack. But before and after this period they are mostly used for flanks, harassment, pursuit. Generally they would only press home an attack of the enjoy stunned demoralized and disorganized, then they were quite successful. But only on flat and open ground. Well trained infantry with pikes are the most deadly and effective on the battlefield, you can't really touch them.
Even by the show's own tortured logic, collapsing a mountain with catapults to dam a river makes no sense. Several of the senior elf leaders have repeatedly stated that the city is safe from attack because it is surrounded by rivers. Why would anybody believe that in a world where rivers can be easily dammed and crossed by a dozen orcs with catapults? Are we to believe Adar is a visionary military genius for being the first clown to hurl rocks at a mountain? If so, why does the nameless blonde elf woman with no military training immediately recognize his tactics? This show is a bottomless pit of stupid!
The way Galadridumb just boringly turns around and stabs the Orcs @ 20:27 kills me LOL it looks like an initial scene walkthrough. This show was AWFUL but your review was so freaking hilarious man! Loved it!
thankyou for this it is maddening this show and it needs to be taken down hard for just how dumb this truthy is it's shocking just how bad it really is!
First of all, Love the video. I'd like to come with one critique of this review. Being fucked enough on hallucinogens, will definitely make you unable to tell a solid from a fluid, in my experience. Fuck this fucking show. I haven't watched an Episode. I cancel my Prime subscription when it premiers. Did that last year as well.
In my defense I've never taken acid or anything so I was just speculating. Thank you for enjoying the video despite my lack of experience in the drug scene.
Yes we all feel violated by this atrocity of writing. I would love to hear from the perspective of the writers, whether Amazon execs kept making demands, like "add treants, tom bombadil, trollzilla, fake saruman, find an epic way to do a siege that nobody's ever seen before". I expect their non disclosure contract prevent this however.
Give me five minutes alone in a room with the writers. Either they’ll realise some basic concepts of storytelling or I’ll have done the world a favour and only ask to wash my hands afterward.
I get the sentiment of wanting to see the end of Rings of Power. I gave season 1 a try thought it was crap and wasn't going to watch season 2. But I decided to watch it, I can't remember why I made this decision. But man, I had so much fun watching it. Not because it was good, oh no, but because it was so bad it ended up being freaking hilarious. I laughed so much watching season 2. Making fun of the ridiculous things I saw and then watching youtube videos to see what they picked up on that I had missed. It doesn't need to end so it doesn't taint Lord of the Rings books or movies. No one is going to think any less of those two because of RoP.
Foldgers Columbian is amazing good coffee. The flake like grind texture applied to the best beans on Earth is unique. The lesser quality Arabica and Blend pale in comparison. Lacas does the best Blend grind, it's that crazy good coffee served in many classic roadside diners. Lacas can sit for hours a still taste fresh brewed. I need a coffee now, thanks bro.
Can we cancel the ROP Show now? ❌ My head herts. 🤦Time for me to do my after ROP logic cleansing with watching an extended version of Lord of the rings 1 through 3.
You know what make this show awesome Anytime Galadriel, has trouble she just turns into super mega super super saiyan (did I mention super) Galadriel and she just says "DON"T F*&*K WITH ME" and they just run away.
You know what I don't understand about the whole 'Damming the River'? Was the river only 3 feet deep? The water is gone, and the city walls are just, like, right there. Wouldn't the walls be waaaaay up above the battle-ground? 🤔
Nice video man! Is this going to get Critical Drinker in trouble with Toilet Duck? You know sponsoring competing products? I am trying to watch this and I keep falling asleep - oh well - maybe my brain is just trying to protect itself - I have been watching Agatha also (what is this, Ashoka, Acolyte, Agatha - is this the year of the "A"s - should more be like the "F"s).
Wait, what? If the wall is so weak that they can hammer a giddam log though it, then they can just attack it with picks and hammers. Even if it was made of sandstone, the weight is enormous and the spring force required to yank chunks from the _bottom_ of the wall in spite of weight and friction would be beyond any material they have. It would snap the timbers first, and wtf are they using to power it? And since they have to spend at that time driving the ram into the wall, they might as well build a big armored shed roof they can push to to the wall and just start pulling the wall apart by hand under the roof. Not that either is plausible, which is why even relatively small walls were considered impassible except by storm or surprise, and siege was by far the most common tactic against walled fortifications. They weren't idiots in the past, they tried many things, if that idea wasn't used is because it doesn't work. What does work though, when you have the men? Build a earth ramp against the wall. They don't have limitless arrows, and you can protect the the workers, work in the dark. The Greeks are doing that way back in the BC, it's a fundamental plot point in several plays, where they are building the wall higher entry day to delay the ramp reaching the parapet, or they tunnel through their own walls to remove soil from the bottom of the ramp in the dark. So it can be done. Just not with a frigging timber spring machine device.
Can someone explain something to me? The gold that the dwarves are mining, are they looting gold from a dragon's horde, or robbing another dwarves loot? Why are there a ton of chalices, plates, necklaces? Am I wrong? Did I not see that right? Did the art department just go down to the prop house and grab a bunch 'gold stuff'?😤
@@DarkHourYT It's blatent idiocracy! Pure amature hour. How did no one on set point this out? It's literally a bunch of children in charge. Liks the 'damming the river'. Wouldn't the walls of the city have been at least 20-30 feet above the battle ground? Was the river only 5 ft. deep? The stupidity of this show.
I like how discount Saruman has become a Rasputin. All of these memorable new characters are becoming cultural characters. Feminem, female Frodo, Not Gandalf, lord of wigs. We are making history here, not them.
![ARGENTINA vs. BOLIVIA [6-0] | RESUMEN | ELIMINATORIAS SUDAMERICANAS | FECHA 10](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/C3wPtKNbAOA/mqdefault.jpg)
Putting "(feat. The Critical Drinker)" in your title is basically the same thing as saying, "I am about to give a monumentally stupid take."
Pin of shame for you
@@DarkHourYT he's right, you're wrong - whatever you say, Tolkien's family hates you.
@@pagonel you mean his sell out, failure of a grandson who sold the rights to try and fund his own Trainwreck of a writing career?
@@pagonel Nobody cares about Tolkien's family. They're not him, and if they defend this garbage they're idiots.
@@pagonel cope
Can you imagine when the writers wrote "The stranger" and thought, "Just wait until episode 8 of season 2 when they find out it's actually, Gandalf!"
And from the first moment he appeared on screen, reviews called him Gandalf 😂
I can't get over the orcs having a weapon powerful enough to destroy mountains - but not using it to destroy their enemy's walls.
Generations from now, people will still be enchanted by J.R.R. Tolkien's books. Amazon's fiasco will be largely forgotten, it will be vaguely remembered only as a colossal costly failure!
Well it's actually very well documented so odds are it won't be forgotten
@@DarkHourYT Most fiction will be forgotten. Buried in radioactive dust.
@@DarkHourYT It will be forgotten, my dude. Do you remember the shows that used to be HUGE back in the 80s and the 90s, hell even the 2000s? Most of them are all but forgotten already. Only those who grew up with them have watched them. It's very likely that this show will get swept under the rug and forgotten to history in a few years.
@@drkushajagadeesh6347 in fairness if you couldn't tell from my extremely diverse cutaway clip selections I often remembers a most things I've watched but I get you
@@DarkHourYT He meant largely forgotten not ‘forgotten’ how it is sometimes used: where as long as there is one human alive that remembers, or it is written somewhere, it is not lost.
Counterweight Trebuchet effective range - 300-400 metres.
Rings of Power - Judging by the orcs' position in relation to the bridge which lies between them and the mountain, they appear to be several miles away from the target. Not only do they still hit it with sufficient force to smash a mountain, but they hit it half-way up the mountain-side.
If I didn't know better, I'd say the writers didn't have a clue what they were doing. Oh wait ...
300-400m is quite optimistic, perhaps some massive trebuchet, although at that range it couldn't hit anything with precision, I mean it's a stone not guided projectile. These orcish 'trebuchets' are relatively small, a hybrid between a trebuchet and a classical catapult, realistically these things can't probably reach 100-150m if they could work at all, especially because they don't have a sling but a bucket. The best case scenario - hurl a few rocks on the wall and into the city, with no significant damage. Maybe if they keep bombarding the city for months and months... mountain? haha
Dude, why you switching from metric to imperial? It was like 10-15km (MINIMUM). That's like a guy throwing a football completely over the length of a professional football stadium.
Judging by how slowly the trebuchets move i would say they could barely move the rocks 50m. Also technically not a trebuchet but some weird catapult hybrid
@@brianfewer919 Because I'm British and we use both, but crucially because a net search gave me the range of a trebuchet in metric, and I couldn't be bothered converting it for people. To correct that:
"Siege engine in show has comically impossible range."
The part where 3 fireballs hit the fortress with the speed and power of fighter jet missals I LOL'd. 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
That cut to the folgers song as he drinks his coffee was perfection hahah
The first minute of this video has better, concise and beautiful wording and writing than the whole of the rings of Cringe. Your phone = Legend
shoutout to rings of power for creating this so show so i can watch youtube reviews on how bad it is
😊 Nice. Thanks for watching this, so I didn't have to. The Balrog does look amazing, but it's hard to mess up the incredible design created by Jackson and his team.
Yeah they just copied the homework
@@DarkHourYTI was waiting for the Balrog to be Asian looking actually
How and why did they use the exact same design? I'm shocked at the plagiarism
@marckhachfe1238 if you're shocked by that, you should see what else is in the show. The entire thing is loosely ripped off of Jackson's trilogy, while they make up a bunch of dumb characters to pollute the lore even more!
@11:05 his natural camouflage makes him naturally invisible 😂😂😂😂
Wait...where did the water go?
Did they really write that they dropped a dam, which is just rocks stacked and not a solid wall, and that the water just disappears after that, like pulling the plug on a bathtub?
LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Remember Treebeard and Isengard? Remember "release the river"? Oh yeah I member.
And that nice solid road way across the river bed, ready to roll the wagons and engines across, the thousands of troops, the cavalry without anyone getting mired down or it turning into a mud pit. And then the water will break though in a unknown place and cut you off mid crossing.
@@TheSuperappelflap That was an engineered reservoir, like Lake Mead. You predetermine where the overflow goes, and since Sauroman isn't an idiot they would have dug canals to divert it away from Isengard. That's different than just winging rocks at a mountain and expecting an effective dam to construct itself.
Literally LOLd at "the Orcs than proceeded to peacefully protest the fk out of eregion" 😂
I’m not really seeing how continuing the charge would have been a bad thing. The cage with Galadriel in it as right at the front and as close as they got before stopping, I’m fairly sure that if they’d just kept going they would have quickly rolled over the orcs and swarmed around the cage. Securing her release in the process. At least based on how a fantasy cavalry charge usually works anyway. But in stopping they probably caused countless more elves to die. Just some more red in Galadriel’s ledger I guess.
We need to put something to bed here. The theory of the "toxic Fandom"... there is no such thing. If you like something, you're a fan... if not, you aren't a fan. It's like being a friendly enemy. It's an oxymoron. Only something the left could come up with to shift the blame. I'm not toxic, I'm just not a fan of this show.
No dear commenter.
I am proud to be part of the "Toxic Fandom".
Toxic fandom exists! There are some folks who harbour an irrational hatred towards this series! On multiple levels! And then there are others (like me!) who simply don't like this show, but can reasonably articulate why. And can even stomach the idea that others might like this show, since that is THEIR choice! Not mine!
So... Like Everything Else, there is a Spectrum! Try not to simplify the un-simplyfiable! Because it won't work! 😊
@@sdwone if you don't like the show, then you by definition are NOT a fan. You people have totally missed the point. "Toxic fans" is a bullshit term made by people with no accountability.
@@sdwone I don't like this show. So I'm not a fan. So I cannot be a "toxic fan", because I'm not a fan to begin with.
@@sdwone and I could give a damn what anyone else likes. We actual Tolkien fans don't like this show because it's dumb, cannon breaking. Badly acted, and extremely poorly thought out. And everyone who reviews it all have very intelligent arguments why it's bad. It's not irrational to hate something that's terrible. And if you can't understand that, then it's your problem, not mine. If you like mindless entertainment, more power to you. But tear down other people's opinions because you don't understand the criticism.
Thank you for 'seeing what I haven't seen'.
The clip at 12:30 where Galadridum walks in from the secret passage is the perfect example of how most of the acting is that of a school play.
"Moronatard" always makes me laugh. Once again, you have word assembled a fantastic post.
Its only second to Don Lemonlas
No, I look forward to the weekly roasts of this show. I lost Willow, please don't take this show from me.
Hahaha yeah I agree with you 😄👍
Whoever wrote the scripts was like "I cannot brain today, me has the dumb... but I'll write it anyway!", and every director was like "It's shitposting time!", while Amazon's like "Its Magnum Opus time!"
I wonder who your alcohol specialist was? That voice sounds familiar.
@@chrisgionti2766 the world may never know
Thanks for calling him L. Ron Hubbard - I've been thinking of that name for ages haha
Glad your video popped up in my feed today. You are funny as hell dude, Elrond Hubbard cracked be up, subscribed!
Thank you. I like hearing RUclips is pushing my content
Their trebuchets have buckets when they are supposed to have slings.
Yeah - buckets don't work - I know bc for my sons final year science project we made a 25% size trebuchet and managed to hurl a coke bottle 150 meters! (Till the police arrived and asked us if we had a license for the weapon... science project. They let us take the photos and measurements and then we had to pack it away... I think they were amused but there is always some Karen out there to complain... My son got an 'A'!)
Buckets work for a catapult, not so much for a trebuchet...
11:08 HAHAHA omg , seriously dude, I love you!
@@mii481 the love is mutual
Absolutely the best review. More on the fun side, making the review entertaining. 👍
@@ThereIsAlwaysaWay2 thank you. I'm currently covering Agatha and will be covering Skelton Crew as well
Kudo for suffering through this. 100 years from now people will still talk about Tolkien and enjoy his books. No one will care about this show a month after it's cancelled.
7:49 ... I might need DH Distillery to repress that
They just forgot they ran Blah-golas through from one script to the other ... People were paid a stupid amount of money to write this, which is the single most depressing part. Thank god we have a case of DH Distiliery's black-label moonshine on hand for just such an occasion.
My good friends Johnny Walker and Jack Daniels supported me greatly through the first season of this show. Unfortunately, even they couldnt help me get past episode 3 of this season.
@@TheSuperappelflap There's only so much stupidity you can take before the alcohol poisoning sets in
The way they illustrated Sauron manipulating Celebrimbor really bothered me. I understand the writers were trying to show us Sauron had the power to alter people's reality which, to a lesser writer sounds reasonable for a character that's manipulative and deceptive.
But what they failed to realize is how much scarier it is when Sauron doesn't HAVE to alter your reality to convince you to do what he wants. It's a cool power, sure, to be able to create elaborate illusions to trick someone into doing your bidding unwillingly. But it's soooo much scarier when someone can simply use what's already in your mind to convince you you WANT to do it.
Saurons greatest power has always been his ability to bend others to his will, and it's fundamental to not only his character but to the history of Middle Earth. It would be far more interesting, and logical, for Sauron to prey on Celebrimbors own insecurities and weaknesses to convince him he wanted to craft all the rings, which would also ensure that the smith gives it his all. They started the thing this way, but somewhere along the way they dropped it in favor of Sauron just making stupid magic illusions.
It would have been far more compelling if Celebrimbor had been a willing assistant in the forging of the rings, the way he was in the books, with Sauron only having to amplify the traits already in Celebrimbors heart and mind. It would have been so much more of a tragic end as well, if Celebrimbor had never even suspected he was doing something wrong, until the very end when Sauron shows up to take the rings and his entire perspective comes crashing down around him as he's betrayed and butchered by someone he thought of as a peer and mentor. They convolute and water down so much good lore, it's absolutely insufferable. Especially since these are not difficult concepts to grasp in the first place...
One reason i DO NOT want RoP to die is because i love so much hate watching videos of mofos tearing this b.s show to shreds. Its like a guilty pleasure to me now, and there's dozens of new RUclips channels that were built shitting on this awful show and I'm there for all of it! I love it! So please amazon, keep making this trash fire and throwing money away, and if you cancel this show...give that money to your warehouse workers and drivers!
26:05 Damn, that is a DEEP cut. Beautiful. Take my like.
I've been waiting for awhile to use that
Great vdo DarkHour, cheers!
11:26 man i love that audio skid from the good bad ugly. Bane uses it their song "both guns blazing" -just epic!
In project mayhem, the Balrog had no name, in death, it shall be M. Bison....
The only value shows like this have is the entertainment value of videos like this 😂
I actually kinda want them to make all 5 Seasons. Don't get me wrong, it's not because it's good- quite the opposite! I wanted them to cancel it until I realize just how much hilarious side content that comes out of these otherwise terrible Shows. The same goes with Star Wars- keep making it all bad so folks like you, Charlie Hopkins and all the other Independent creators can keep on entertaining me by teasing the crap out of these Shows.
If you haven't heard of Charlie Hopkins, check his stuff out- the dude is hella-talented and brilliantly hilarious! He can emulate almost anyone's voice, then he dresses up like the Characters he plays (he plays them all) and adds a small bit of AI to give the Characters he plays their proper face- it's quite convincing. His Tom Bombidil cracks me up to no end. He mostly does Tolkein/Star Wars stuff, but he also does stand-up and other stuff as well.
Nice vid either way! If they cancel it I will be happy, if they don't I will be happy since we're garaunteed more great side content, just like this! It's sort of a no-lose situation for me! And I'm a pessimist, so it's kinda odd that I'm so optimistic about this :P
I was actually quite sad when they cancelled Acolyte cause that was when I discovered this format
@@DarkHourYT I'm a little sad they canceled it too, for all the same reasons mentioned above :D
Thaks for the vid!
Glad I'm not the only one putting out the word about him. Absolutely genius content, and I consider my standards quite high.
I’m not watching the show but really enjoying the videos.
Great video dude. 🔥🔥
5:58 I feel personally attacked 👀
@@JadenSmithEyes I did think of you when I wrote that line
Good
Catapults should have been switched to trebuchets because as a more morden invention, it had a wider range of damage, and could launch heavier loads. Those that were featured in the series are catapults ( with the bucket) that can launch the load weighted from 25 to 40 pounds, while trebuts could launch boulders weighted from 440 to 660 pounds. I doubt those catapults should be able to launch such a heavy load and at such a distance .
Making the Rings for men took over 500 years, not days
Military strategy in RoP, even for a fantasy series, is just effing dumb in so many ways.
26:20 no one is even swinging at each other. There are so many cuts here that half the fighting happens off-camera!
The alcohol commercial was perfection 👌
Celebimbo: “Look, Smellrond, the dork army is attacking! What should we do?”
Smellrond: “We need expert battle plans…fetch the mentally challenged toddlers!”
Cue suspenseful kazoo music…
Unlike game of thrones, Amazon R.o.P are afraid to unalive their characters
Wow, I thought it was over too. Every review I've listened to has made it seem that way. Guess everyone us in denial. Randomly popped up in my feed, good stuff 👍
I’m glad I’m contractually obligated to watch reviews and not shows
It used to be that you could watch all the truely dire tv shows on "insert stick". This show is so bad no one has bothered to restream it. I feel blessed you sound like your eyes hurt.
Holy shit! I haven't heard a folgers jingle since the 90s it feels like
Instead of hanging around the exit, why didn't the orcs move their whole army through Gadlariel's 'secret' tunnel, bypassing the wall altogether?
Outstanding... a Mike Polk Cleveland throwback reference. I see what you did there DH, operating in your Rings of Power "Factory of Sadness!!"
"our main export is crippling depression"
In your intro, "Evil cannot create anything new, they can only corrupt and ruin what good forces have invented or made." is not a quote from J.R.R. Tolkien; it is a quote from lots of RUclips commenters, ironically quoting each other (rather than creating anything new).
It's a paraphrase from Return of the King or one of his letters (I think), but the intent is still the same.
It is from Return of the King: "No, they eat and drink, Sam. The Shadow that bred them can only mock, it cannot make: not real new things of its own. I don't think it gave life to the orcs, it only ruined them and twisted them;"
Yeah, it's more of a paraphrase from a part in RotK. What's hilarious is in the behind the scenes thing, the actor who plays Gilga-Daddy quotes the *paraphrase* which is hilarious and means he must have read the comments of people paraphrasing that quote to shit on the show. 😂 And called it his "favorite quote"! But somehow didn't realize it's about them and their stupid show.
0:51 saying that makes RoP sound like a fantasy villain, which is appropriate since one does not watch RoP, but rather exhaustingly wrestles with it.
Elrond and Galadriel kissing...
Let's take a look on Elrond's family: he is son of Earendil, who is son of Idril, who is the daughter of Turgon, who is the son of Fingolfin, who is the brother of Finarfin, who is the father of... oh, look! Galadriel!
This is, frankly, a really dumb argument. Remember, he marries her daughter later anyway. If we lived thousands of years this isn't something we'd care about that much, that's still significantly far enough apart on the family tree to be of any concern and most elves are undoubtedly related in some way because elves don't have that many children and don't die.
Hell, first cousins are accepted in many parts of the world even today, and were throughout most of human history.
The problem is how elven mating works, which is once and permanent, not even "death" can break the bond because elves are reborn. Therefore, Galadriel for all intents and purposes is still married to Celeborn even if he did die (of which the show does not depict).
Even better: Elrond is the husband of her daughter, Galadriel is his mother-in-law.
Don't worry, Giant Meteor will settle everything.
this show will never die🤣
At least you will only have one more season to get through. No way it's given a 4th season with the views it has gotten.
"STOP ASKING QUESTIONS IT'S NONE OF YOUR CONCERN!" 💀
One of the powers of elves is they can choose to die physically so that they can reincarnate into a healthy body. Now maybe sorcery can force him to stay alive, and i'd buy it if morgoth was involved, but I just don't see Sauron before the ring as being anywhere near that powerful.
Your agent was formerly a teacher in Peanuts
Yeah probably why hes are bad at his job
Howdy.
Adar's return to Gorgeous Mountain has nothing to do with the ring. He simply found a good dermatologist.
No, Tolkien did not once say that evil can not create anything new and that it can only destroy. That's just a paraphrasing from what Frodo said in one of the books.
Frodo said it.
And who... wrote the line said by this hero character?
@@br9809 There is a very big difference between someone saying something himself and someone writing a line for a character in a book. What Sam said in the book reflects Tolkien's view on evil, which is Catholic. But to say "as Tolkien once said" is just a false statement.
@@Puma5 You are correct, I must have misremembered as Sam his name was mentioned in that part.
Im ready to laugh at season 3 of RoP.
A writer doesnt find the words, the words find they/them
The only way to watch this show is through RUclips channels making fun of it. I’m so confused, who is fighting who!?!?
The elves, who want to kill Sauron, are fighting the orcs who also want to kill Sauron...itˋs so stupid!
The range on them catas is insane.
I also had an ad play right after Brimbo was hit by the trebuchet.
these episodes had more endings than the trilogies combined
@@That_One_Kobold oh no a Kobold... *Hides the shiny*
Well cavalry can be for direct assault. Heavy cavalry, with lances. You can also charge an enemy line with standard cavalry, and frequently break it just by psychological intimidation, unless he troops are well trained and disciplined and understand that if the line breaks at all, they are screwed. You can't charge a line that stays intact, you have to break off if you can't get any of them to run. If any of them _do_ run, you have an opening and can get in to attack from behind, which is why if any part of the line panics, the rest will often disintegrate, because it's hopeless to stand after the first guys ran. That's why they developed the square, to prevent that from happening, so the army was broken into self sufficient units that each had to be broken, which could defend in all directions, and which could reinforce and consolidate more easily. But yes, calvary is useless against an intact line. Almost all casualties come from after the line breaks and the men are cut down fleeing in a mob. Horses can't and won't just crash into a solid line of men, and it would just be a disaster if you tried. Armored knights sort of could by using lances to help break up the line, and the formation was usually not well disciplined at that time anyway, so they could expect to terrorize the troops into breaking halls in the line when they saw the line of armored tanks on huge horses pounding directly at them. Then they can use their armor and momentum to drive wedges into the line and break it up more for the rest of the knights to attack. But before and after this period they are mostly used for flanks, harassment, pursuit. Generally they would only press home an attack of the enjoy stunned demoralized and disorganized, then they were quite successful. But only on flat and open ground. Well trained infantry with pikes are the most deadly and effective on the battlefield, you can't really touch them.
Elrond-hubbard, Moron-Attar, Celebrimboob, Black Legolas, Dur-imbecile, Lord Balls-Are-Gone, Bombadildo, Galadradumb!! -- LMAO
Even by the show's own tortured logic, collapsing a mountain with catapults to dam a river makes no sense. Several of the senior elf leaders have repeatedly stated that the city is safe from attack because it is surrounded by rivers. Why would anybody believe that in a world where rivers can be easily dammed and crossed by a dozen orcs with catapults? Are we to believe Adar is a visionary military genius for being the first clown to hurl rocks at a mountain? If so, why does the nameless blonde elf woman with no military training immediately recognize his tactics? This show is a bottomless pit of stupid!
The only good thing about this wretched series are the hilarious reviews done by you folks that are taking one for the team.
The way Galadridumb just boringly turns around and stabs the Orcs @ 20:27 kills me LOL it looks like an initial scene walkthrough. This show was AWFUL but your review was so freaking hilarious man! Loved it!
Thank you. Yeah I agree it looks like a dress rehearsal
Morphine Cluck as Grandma-driel is positively apathy-inducing🐓🐓🐓
They wanted Grond, but they got Bryce.
Blac rack and Van gard, two evil companies own amazon. Destroying what we love is the #1 goal of those two companies.
thankyou for this it is maddening this show and it needs to be taken down hard for just how dumb this truthy is it's shocking just how bad it really is!
First of all, Love the video.
I'd like to come with one critique of this review. Being fucked enough on hallucinogens, will definitely make you unable to tell a solid from a fluid, in my experience.
Fuck this fucking show. I haven't watched an Episode. I cancel my Prime subscription when it premiers. Did that last year as well.
In my defense I've never taken acid or anything so I was just speculating. Thank you for enjoying the video despite my lack of experience in the drug scene.
@@DarkHourYT Thank you for the content!
You belong on FNT as a guest. Get a hold of them, they helped out Disparu.
I've been on Open Bar several times
@@DarkHourYT Nice!
Well said. Thank you for your sacrifice.
🫡
maybe it does a reverse true detective/got and gets super good later on
Yes we all feel violated by this atrocity of writing. I would love to hear from the perspective of the writers, whether Amazon execs kept making demands, like "add treants, tom bombadil, trollzilla, fake saruman, find an epic way to do a siege that nobody's ever seen before". I expect their non disclosure contract prevent this however.
I’m pretty sure black elf’s legal name is reindeer, “useless the dumbass reindeer” to be exact
Give me five minutes alone in a room with the writers.
Either they’ll realise some basic concepts of storytelling or I’ll have done the world a favour and only ask to wash my hands afterward.
They need to get fans to do the writing, obviously the writers never read any Tolkien.
I get the sentiment of wanting to see the end of Rings of Power. I gave season 1 a try thought it was crap and wasn't going to watch season 2. But I decided to watch it, I can't remember why I made this decision. But man, I had so much fun watching it. Not because it was good, oh no, but because it was so bad it ended up being freaking hilarious. I laughed so much watching season 2. Making fun of the ridiculous things I saw and then watching youtube videos to see what they picked up on that I had missed. It doesn't need to end so it doesn't taint Lord of the Rings books or movies. No one is going to think any less of those two because of RoP.
Foldgers Columbian is amazing good coffee. The flake like grind texture applied to the best beans on Earth is unique. The lesser quality Arabica and Blend pale in comparison. Lacas does the best Blend grind, it's that crazy good coffee served in many classic roadside diners. Lacas can sit for hours a still taste fresh brewed. I need a coffee now, thanks bro.
I love how, in your world, characters can earn their names back Clanner-style. 🤣
@@Archangelm127 It was bound to happen eventually
@@DarkHourYT Yeah. Something something a thousand monkeys with typewriters.
Can we cancel the ROP Show now? ❌ My head herts. 🤦Time for me to do my after ROP logic cleansing with watching an extended version of Lord of the rings 1 through 3.
Obscure SF Joke? I understood that reference!
Please no, not die! I'm looking forwart to many more RoP seasons... I don't watch them, but the rant videos are very enjoyable.
You know what make this show awesome
Anytime Galadriel, has trouble she just turns into super mega super super saiyan (did I mention super) Galadriel and she just says "DON"T F*&*K WITH ME" and they just run away.
You know what I don't understand about the whole 'Damming the River'? Was the river only 3 feet deep? The water is gone, and the city walls are just, like, right there. Wouldn't the walls be waaaaay up above the battle-ground? 🤔
Nice video man! Is this going to get Critical Drinker in trouble with Toilet Duck? You know sponsoring competing products? I am trying to watch this and I keep falling asleep - oh well - maybe my brain is just trying to protect itself - I have been watching Agatha also (what is this, Ashoka, Acolyte, Agatha - is this the year of the "A"s - should more be like the "F"s).
@@JohnKollar I have no idea what you mean. That's a completely anonymous person
Wait, what? If the wall is so weak that they can hammer a giddam log though it, then they can just attack it with picks and hammers. Even if it was made of sandstone, the weight is enormous and the spring force required to yank chunks from the _bottom_ of the wall in spite of weight and friction would be beyond any material they have. It would snap the timbers first, and wtf are they using to power it? And since they have to spend at that time driving the ram into the wall, they might as well build a big armored shed roof they can push to to the wall and just start pulling the wall apart by hand under the roof. Not that either is plausible, which is why even relatively small walls were considered impassible except by storm or surprise, and siege was by far the most common tactic against walled fortifications. They weren't idiots in the past, they tried many things, if that idea wasn't used is because it doesn't work. What does work though, when you have the men? Build a earth ramp against the wall. They don't have limitless arrows, and you can protect the the workers, work in the dark. The Greeks are doing that way back in the BC, it's a fundamental plot point in several plays, where they are building the wall higher entry day to delay the ramp reaching the parapet, or they tunnel through their own walls to remove soil from the bottom of the ramp in the dark. So it can be done. Just not with a frigging timber spring machine device.
Can someone explain something to me? The gold that the dwarves are mining, are they looting gold from a dragon's horde, or robbing another dwarves loot? Why are there a ton of chalices, plates, necklaces? Am I wrong? Did I not see that right? Did the art department just go down to the prop house and grab a bunch 'gold stuff'?😤
I mention that in the previous video how it makes no sense
@@DarkHourYT It's blatent idiocracy! Pure amature hour. How did no one on set point this out? It's literally a bunch of children in charge. Liks the 'damming the river'. Wouldn't the walls of the city have been at least 20-30 feet above the battle ground? Was the river only 5 ft. deep? The stupidity of this show.
LOOK TO THE NORTH!
*sunrise*
I like how discount Saruman has become a Rasputin. All of these memorable new characters are becoming cultural characters.
Feminem, female Frodo, Not Gandalf, lord of wigs. We are making history here, not them.
Thank you so much for advising me not to watch this. I appreciate you for saving my time.