Phil In The Blanks | Borderline Personality Traits 1-2

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 82

  • @xTheGreatDestroyerx
    @xTheGreatDestroyerx 7 месяцев назад +6

    36 year old female. I grew up in a house of addiction and extreme violence. Diagnosed BPD, Bipolar, PTSD, DID, anxiety, depression, eating disorders, insomnia... I know I'm not an easy person to be around and I've been trying to get help my entire life. I've had therapists/counselors tell me they can't help me, that they're afraid of me. Meds, and I've been on many over the years, have never helped me. They most often made my rage and suicidal ideation worse. In February 2020 I stopped my meds and tried to manage with a healthy diet and exercise. It worked for about two years, I felt amazing. Now I'm back in one of the deepest, darkest depressions I've experienced since last autumn. Trying so hard to get myself back up, some days are good, but this is a lifelong battle I'm sure.

    • @Jazminksie
      @Jazminksie 7 месяцев назад +1

      I am in the same boat to an extent. Off of meditation, but i still drink and smoke cigarettes. I just lost a favorite person, because he thought i was too emotionally unstable, and it's devastated me. 💔. I miss him all the time. I am trying to look at it all as an expensive learning process. My triggers are difficult to manage.

    • @DonnaMayStanish
      @DonnaMayStanish 5 месяцев назад +1

      BPD is a common theme in my family. I believe my mother had it and my sister has it. Neither have been diagnosed with it other than bipolar of which I don't think they have.
      My former husband and my son have it. My being very sensitive means I feel their pain - especially my son. He's also gay which adds to his mixed feelings and confusion.
      I empathize and somewhat understand how you are feeling. I am so sorry for your pain. I have watched my son cry innumerable times. It's challenging to say the least.
      I wish you all the best. Big hug. 🫂❤️

    • @rhonnachurch6929
      @rhonnachurch6929 7 дней назад

      @@xTheGreatDestroyerx what has helped me the most is when i started realizing ( as ive aged) that the things in the bible are real and been on a path of spiritual awareness. Basically all the supernatural things we grew up believing isnt real, well it most certainly IS.

    • @rhonnachurch6929
      @rhonnachurch6929 7 дней назад

      @@Jazminksie yes i know all about the in and out of stabiluty. Usually my triggers for that are when others start trying to distort my reality and it turns out that i dont like being taken for someone or something that i am not.

  • @megtwinkles
    @megtwinkles Год назад +38

    I was diagnosed with BPD at 15 by a doctor who shouldn’t have diagnosed me that young. But lo and behold he was very right, as I was rediagnosed at 25. I resonate with the indentity issues so much. I literally have no idea who I am sometimes, what my core values are, etc. I feel like a child or dog sometimes, like when somebody leaves me, even to go to work I feel like they will never come and my sense of time is warped and I panic.I stayed with a man for 7 years who beat me because being alone felt worse than him hurting me. My mood swings aren’t daily ALOT but they are sometimes hourly. I have been doing dbt and cbt lately, and hoping I stay in treatment this time. But you know how is BPD girls are lol even now my mind is racing and I’m rambling. 😩 oh and the suicide and suicidal ideation. It’s horrible. I feel terrible for my family when I snap on them and am immediately humiliated. It’s a life long battle but I’m gonna keep trying. I have to. But I feel alone.

    • @jannissen4382
      @jannissen4382 Год назад +6

      You will get through it, Just hang in there.🤗

    • @amandajephson9964
      @amandajephson9964 Год назад +7

      I feel empathy for you. Stay with the treatment if you can! ❤

    • @nightrider4370
      @nightrider4370 9 месяцев назад +3

      I'm cheering for you. Keep charging forward. You sound like a good person.

    • @ChrisRichard-v2n
      @ChrisRichard-v2n 6 месяцев назад +2

      I have had BPD aswell as on off Anorexia and OCD for over 30 years. It makes me think of myself as Poison Ivy.
      Everything and everyone I have ever loved leaves breaks or dies. I felt really confused a couple of years ago because I didn't recognise what I was feeling I them sadly realised it was the emotion Happy and I did not recognise or understand it. Stay strong Peeps love to you all cxx

    • @DonnaMayStanish
      @DonnaMayStanish 5 месяцев назад +1

      I have ADHD, anxiety and depression. I understand some of which you describe. It's painful. The only thing I can think of which may help is to try to remain in the present. This is what helps me.
      When I feel a panic attack looming or the raw feeling of abandonment, I slow down with intent. I sit down. Stop moving. I pet or hug my dog or my cats. It truly helps. Or I will take a warm shower or a bubble bath. Or a slow walk outside in the woods. Being in the woods is extremely calming for me. Watching and listening to the sounds of the wind blowing through the trees, the birds tweeting, looking up at the sky at the clouds or the stars.
      I also understand because my former husband and my son have BPD. Its been challenging for my son and I feel his pain because I am very sensitive.
      Big hug. I wish you all the best. ❤️🫂

  • @Lilak84
    @Lilak84 Год назад +7

    He answered so many of the questions I’ve had for yearsss in one video. He’s hands down the best in the business. Thank you so much, Dr. Phil!!!! ❤

  • @angietinnon6
    @angietinnon6 5 дней назад

    Having a adult child with BPD she’s our world, she has been loved. She was initially diagnosed with Bipolar disorder originally and put on lithium which was overkill we have a mental health crisis and very little help. We have finally found someone who has given her the proper diagnosis. I am no psychiatrist in my line of work and having a DSM she is textbook these psychiatrists are so quick to jump to Bipolar.. We have been through so much, Thank you Dr.Phil for explaining.

  • @karenerivera4127
    @karenerivera4127 Год назад +10

    When I was growing up, my late mother, quite often would be very suspicious that I was up to something sinister. She was determined that she was not going to be fooled by me, and that I should be thoroughly punished. I was sincerely trying to be a good little girl, but no matter what I did, she would falsely accuse me of things and stir my dad up to beat my butt. Later he began to catch on, so instead of beating my butt, he would make me apologize to my mom for things I didn't really do. All this created a great deal of anguish in my life. When I became an adult, at family gatherings at my house, everything seemed fine and happy until everyone went home. Then the call would come about what a bad hostess I was, or how I didn't serve Grandpa enough coffee, even though I served him 5 cups, or I deprived Grandma of having a baked potato when everyone else got one, even though Grandma insisted she didn't want a potato. Then she would tell my dad how I mistreated my grandparents so horribly. This would in turn stir up my dad's righteous indignation against this villain of a daughter who is torturing the grandparents.
    Fast forward to my 60s. I still have flashbacks of the trauma. And, when others falsely accuse me of things and I become a surprise villain, it is too painful to continue in that relationship.

  • @Maddy-l9w
    @Maddy-l9w Год назад +6

    Excellent analysis; and beautifully compassionate.

  • @ssing7113
    @ssing7113 Год назад +14

    Here’s what it likes being with a BPD ( true story )
    Get on a plane to see my dying dad. 5 mins in Driving back from seeing him she starts a rage fit. Is on a plane less then 24 hours from flying. While I’m trying to process my dad on his deathbed…
    Fun times…………………
    People don’t do it. Anyone in a relationship. You are 95% a codependent. Get therapy to break the trauma bond and attachment and you can get to the point of leaving and saving yourself from early death

    • @hannaheunis2035
      @hannaheunis2035 Год назад +5

      They can't see anyone else, but themselves...

    • @nikkinorton8310
      @nikkinorton8310 Год назад +2

      A codependent needs someone to need them. It's something that you have to do for survival as a child of a narcissist/BPD.
      You may even get some narcissistic fleas.
      Stress is the big thing. Living in survival mode is a big thing. Not recognizing and putting up with behaviors as adults that we saw as normal growing up... that we had to put up with then, is a big thing. Possible PTSD or what is labeled as narcissistic abuse syndrome (that's not in the DSM) is another biggie.
      But if you get away from the behaviors you can go back to normal. The longer you stay, the less you, you are.

  • @nursebeanflicker4276
    @nursebeanflicker4276 2 месяца назад +1

    I'm BPD, you make me feel like an awful person, thanks

    • @Julia-b9x
      @Julia-b9x Месяц назад

      You may or may not be awful, but if your behavior is that of a bpd, your behavior is awful. It's scary and dangerous for everyone around you.

    • @nursebeanflicker4276
      @nursebeanflicker4276 Месяц назад

      @@Julia-b9x how ignorant!

    • @nursebeanflicker4276
      @nursebeanflicker4276 Месяц назад

      @@Julia-b9x makes me feel even better, thank you

  • @sharolmongrain8022
    @sharolmongrain8022 20 дней назад

    Thanx Phil for your kind help❤️

  • @Jesuswillprevail7
    @Jesuswillprevail7 6 месяцев назад

    Dr. Phil thank you. I didn't know who I was. Now I know who I am and what I am. I am a Christian. I am a Child of God. I am a prayer warrior.

  • @julioklj8
    @julioklj8 6 месяцев назад

    Well said. I wish I knew then what I know now about BPD. Would have saved me years of confusion and pain. I look back now and am shocked with what I put up with

  • @Renzy-LuLu
    @Renzy-LuLu 8 дней назад

    I have serious doubts I qualify for bpd after hearing him describe these extremes. I overcame my abandonment issues. I may panic within but allover I TRUST my life and I wait and see. All this extreme extreme extreme... I'm sure all of this is just NOT the case with most lol

  • @fionagrant2023
    @fionagrant2023 Год назад +1

    Following with interest Dr Phil l value your insight and l enjoy learning your analysis 😊

  • @edrathephoenix
    @edrathephoenix 8 месяцев назад +2

    I have the diagnosis however I spent 4 years in DBT, the gold standard treatment for BPD.
    Btw, a person isn’t borderline or a borderline. They’re a human being with a disorder. Do you call a person with cancer a cancer?

  • @saganhuxley
    @saganhuxley Год назад +2

    Oh my goodness, this particular talk 100% confirmed an event that just happened to me. I call it an emotional “drive by.” I love this woman dearly but I set a firm boundary *immediately* and was called “angry” for doing so. Then, everything I already laid down was repeated back to me as if they were in charge, and then they did the whole “push the person away before they can abandon you” thing. Just…absolutely wild. I really want to suggest therapy without that suggestion sounding like an insult, cause she literally does this to every single person in her life. Not sure what to do because I really don’t want to communicate with her again.

    • @karenerivera4127
      @karenerivera4127 Год назад +1

      RUN!!! FAST!!!

    • @Julia-b9x
      @Julia-b9x Месяц назад

      Yes, exiting that relationship is the best thing, smartest thing you could ever do.

  • @le_th_
    @le_th_ Год назад +16

    Nope. I have compassion for them, but I will NOT go through more PTSD from some unhinged Borderline personality ever again. There is a reason the FBI considers this one of the 4 most DANGEROUS personalities someone can encounter in their lifetime, and that can turn their entire life upside down (or much worse).
    40% of US and UK prisons, both male and female, are populated with people diagnosed (forensically) with BPD/EUPD.
    No more. Never again. I wouldn't with BPD on my worst enemy. Likewise, I wouldn't wish someone with BPD on my worst enemy.
    These people can traumatize you so badly that they leave you with CRIPPLING PTSD that takes you *years* to fully recover from, leaving you like a shell of a corpse that you don't recognize.
    ...and god can't help you if they have a comorbid Cluster B personality disorder on top of BPD. They can act like a total sociopath, without any provocation whatsoever. Absolutely TERRIFYING when they go into that sociopathic rage.

    • @karenerivera4127
      @karenerivera4127 Год назад +1

      Yes!

    • @solomancambridge2572
      @solomancambridge2572 Год назад +4

      Thanks for sharing.
      I was a magnet for Borderlines.
      Now I intend to maintain my happy bachelor lifestyle.
      There seems to be too much madness out there today.
      If and when I do choose to date there will be a more thorough vetting system in place to keep my sanity.😂

    • @dawnscott8164
      @dawnscott8164 11 месяцев назад

      💯True

  • @kerrynihart6648
    @kerrynihart6648 2 месяца назад

    I have bipolar, BPD, and PTSD, and agoraphobia. My therapist quit on the day of our last appointment, and I couldn’t see my new one for 4 months. Yes, life can be very difficult. I felt sort of abandoned emotionally, because my last therapist never said goodbye or that he was leaving. Perhaps he didn’t know? I just take my medications and try to get through each day. I was married for 13 years, divorced and single for 3 years, and have been married to my second husband for 18 years, & only harmed myself once, during my first marriage. Now, I am thankful and focusing on living a much more healthy emotional/mentally healthy life, but I still have anxiety, but for many legit reasons, and not imagined. Whenever I must leave home, especially when I’m not in my local shops, my IBS and IC starts going bananas, and I feel like I can hardly get from one safe, public bathroom to the next, and it becomes embarrassing, but after I’m focusing on something else and get all of my bathroom trips done, then, I’m better. My prescription medicine helps, but I never knew what BPD meant, because I saw it on some insurance paperwork of mine but didn’t know what any of it meant. Thanks, Dr Phil

  • @LN-jr6nj
    @LN-jr6nj Год назад +9

    Im helplessly witnessing a borderline destroy my loved one’s life, self esteem and identity as well as her children’s. Absolutely no remorse. They will suck you dry and leave you for dead as best outcome. Human nightmares.

    • @rhonnachurch6929
      @rhonnachurch6929 2 месяца назад +1

      @@LN-jr6nj excuse me, i am bpd and i dont relate to "sucking you dry" and i dont "leave people dead as a best outcome". Like i said before, i do not relate to a lot of this information. So, file it however you want to, but sometimes i think we have an abundance of people who are lazy about communicating or inconveniencing themselves when it comes to walking a mile in someone elses shoes.....
      You know a lot of these illnesses and conditions didnt used to exist as they do presently, and that all lines up with how a couple industries have poisoned us and addicted us to thier food preservatives, and thier pharmacological slavery.

    • @lindsey974
      @lindsey974 2 месяца назад

      Most have remorse and shame

    • @rhonnachurch6929
      @rhonnachurch6929 2 месяца назад

      @@lindsey974 the people with BPD or the people who work in the food and pharma industry?
      I totally agree that i sometimes have remorse when i should have said something to stick up for myself, and i feel shame in my life because all appearences i seem like a fuck up. Only i have learned so much about myself and others and complex relationships, the kinds of things that other, busy, people will never get to.

  • @Whatever8197V
    @Whatever8197V Год назад +1

    Another great lot of information ...i am not BPD but i have issues i seem to cross over all different personalities you have described ...in about 2 or 3 ...so maybe i am a mixture😅. Oh well 😮
    Love yr work❤

  • @Bianca-sw5id
    @Bianca-sw5id 6 месяцев назад

    Doctor Phil , there is plenty to recognise to identify people's psychological ID and then to manage or cope with for example Malignant Narcissistist , it's exhausting to you. . . Doctor Phil , I am sure that you have to treat everyone the same but understand their personality and align with things you have in common with them to chat to them about those with them and exchange information with each other , I think like attracts like. . .in any relationship. . .

  • @jannissen4382
    @jannissen4382 Год назад

    thank you so much.

  • @Googlegirl54
    @Googlegirl54 5 месяцев назад

    I read a Boyfriend's book (He was going to school to become a physiatrist. ) The Title was Abnormal Behaviors. I thought I had EVERYTHING! lol....Every thing I read I thought..I get like that sometimes...I've acted that way sometimes ..on and on...

  • @ErnieLeblanc
    @ErnieLeblanc Год назад +1

    This Topic Will Make This RUclips Channel a Top Earner.🇺🇲🎯💥💯💥🎯🇺🇲💰💰💰💰💰

  • @hannaheunis2035
    @hannaheunis2035 Год назад +1

    When going away for work in another town... they will blow up your phone with mesages... and saying you enjoy your time over "there" whilst they "struggle" at home

  • @lottytaylor572
    @lottytaylor572 9 месяцев назад +6

    But you are talking about the extreme end of bpd, which as a doctor i find odd … you must have been taught that its actually a broad spectrum of degrees ! These people have been damaged by some or many forms of abuse as children, they need help NOT stigmatising

    • @Renzy-LuLu
      @Renzy-LuLu 8 дней назад +1

      Agreed!! This sounds like the constant extreme end of those that also likely have other cluster b disorders that end up in prison!!

    • @123-g8z8c
      @123-g8z8c 6 дней назад

      Dr Phil is a tv click bait money grubbing person with little morals lol don't take it to heart. Just try and absorb a little info and ignore his extremes he throws out purposely to stir pots (as he always has and will always do) he's a menace to society 😂

  • @lauramacdonald1213
    @lauramacdonald1213 9 месяцев назад

    My ex left me I was diagnosed with major depression PTSD. I tried to commit suicide as a teenager, and doctors say oh she'll grow out of it. Plus those days shit like that were swept under the rug anyway. And I sought help while we were still together. The medications they gave me made me feel more depressed. I got sleep paralysis I wanted to kill myself worse. My husband never acknowledge d my birthday our anniversary. Valentine's Day it's like he really hated me he left me living in my car in the winter and he moved on right away but out of three relationships so far none of them worked out. He made a lot of promises he never kept I think he got sick of me I get that because of my mental illness but he knew about it before we got married. One day we went into this sports store he saw a skateboard and all of a sudden he couldn't take anymore and left to go skateboard and party with younger girls. I was 4 years older than him. I trusted him he let me down.

  • @JulietteZephyr
    @JulietteZephyr 4 месяца назад

    Its gotten really bad with the guy I've been communicating with since late January. This guy ticks off so many boxes. He lives in Russia where there's the prevailing mindset of distrust (mostly by men) of the medical industry and definitely a deep-seated distrust of psychiatry and mental health care. The culture is very opposed to therapy over there unless the person's well-off. He needs real help!

  • @rhonnachurch6929
    @rhonnachurch6929 5 месяцев назад +2

    I dont relate to a lot of the information about BPD. Ive been dealing with this most of my life, though. I do not love bomb. I do not worry about people being late, or going to visit thier brother. Im used to people generally not listening or hearing or giving any credibility to what i say. Ive been in a couple abusive relationships. A lot of it is mental and emotional abuse, and i notice that most people i know are in or are guilty of emotional mental abuse just being lazy or trying to have things thier way.

  • @Bianca-sw5id
    @Bianca-sw5id 6 месяцев назад

    I love those little videos of the doggies in the car with open window enjoying smells (doggies love to investigate smells like that or on walks) , the wild horses 🐎🐎🐎 are fascinating how they love swimming and live in such a peaceful mindset together it's beautiful. . . and I love birds. . . I love alive and happy animals it's very interesting to understand them and how people look out for them is my favourite , especially Doggies and farm animals being rescued and taken to heavenly homes or heavenly sanctuaries 🙂♥️ I am deeply saddened by how dogs are euthanized because I think they could be included in boarding schools lives with kids not only at vet care at universities , and I think if old age homes were very organised dogs living with the senior citizens who understand how to care for dogs it would give the senior citizens and the dogs healthy lives (and the varsity students could help with walking the dogs and looking out for their health. . .) I think dogs are the future and they can and should be treated with dignity always ♾️ plus it should be properly recognised that kids who grow up with dogs and love looking after dogs are contributing to an economy of doers ♥️♥️

  • @Renzy-LuLu
    @Renzy-LuLu 8 дней назад

    No wonder the stigma he mentions exists. See all the judgemental comments of people that have had ONE experience with one person with this and then tarring all with the same brush. Great way to judge EVERYONE.

  • @judysheen1965
    @judysheen1965 7 месяцев назад

    K not me but I spiral at certain things

  • @judysheen1965
    @judysheen1965 7 месяцев назад

    It’s me

  • @melissataliani925
    @melissataliani925 Год назад

  • @judysheen1965
    @judysheen1965 7 месяцев назад

    K I’m none of these but I’m something

  • @mendyourmind9761
    @mendyourmind9761 Месяц назад

    There’s no such thing as “bipolar personality disorder,” mentioned around 3:20. Bipolar disorder is a mood disorder, not a personality disorder.

  • @freedmm3122
    @freedmm3122 Год назад

    I think my sonnis bipolor and narcacisstic

  • @melanielanders7819
    @melanielanders7819 2 месяца назад

    Stop sending all these interviews!!!

  • @Zowie2
    @Zowie2 10 месяцев назад +2

    I have ultra rapid cycling bipolar AND bpd along with ptsd how can I get help. Adult mental health team in the uk don't want to know. I have a tia in 2020 which left me with a functioning neurological disorder and I can't take meds. I really need help.

    • @vilhelmkron2663
      @vilhelmkron2663 2 месяца назад

      Animal based diet, and alot of CBD along with quality sleep and exercise. . Checkout Paul saladino for good gut advice.