STORY ONE: Sometimes, you cannot save someone if they do not think that they need saving. STORY TWO: Maybe OP shoud ask DW why she stays with him. "Becaues I love you" is probably the answer and, as incmprehensible as that apparently is to him, I advise him to honour her feelings and her desire to remain with him. Love is, after all, mostly about giving.
As for story 1, Given the mother's mental instability, and alcoholism, OP and her fiance should've flown to another state, had a marriage ceremony in a courthouse, and then, had a destination wedding, in the Caribbean, Europe, or on a cruise, or better yet, they should've eloped.😒
When as in story one, things get THAT bad with a close relative, keeping a distance is not only good for the OP (and it definitely is OP needs this,) it is even good for OP's mother. OP's mother needs doctors and therapists now, not OP who is so emotionally traumatized they can't possibly see their mother without bias. Keep a distance and let there be healing. Maybe permanently if necessary. What OP can best do to help here is to protect and assist their sister, take her to coffee etc, and their grandmother. Their mother's mind is not operating properly anymore, and seeing OP might simply upset her. Support for the helpers seeing their mother is what she can best do right now.
Why is an apology always wanted to forgive everything ? Apologies are NOT a blanket forgiveness for everything , and does NOT make things better. People need to STOP asking for Apologies when what's actually needed is distance from these people, not giving into pleadings that contain "we're family, to keep the peace or stop being selfish ". Those phrases should lead to LC and NC , possibly even A RO or calling the POLICE and PRESSING CHARGES.
Story 1: as the daughter of a sever alcoholic who chose to die via alcoholism, the first story hit fucking hard. I remember when, at the age of 13, I visited my mother in the hospital, days before she died. She was way too far gone at that point. She was in a coma, she was bloated, and she was yellow, everywhere. she had no liver left.
Story 2) OP has imposter syndrome. I think it stems from him seeing his entire relationship stemming from a lie. OP should read this post and comment to the MIL and see if he feels less burdened. Ask if you can redo your vows.
Lmfao some of these people are disgusting..who thinks its alright to date their kids friends and saying OP doesn't hav anything to do with her mom relationship.
None of you can care for your mother properly with all the medical issues she has now, especially not your grandmother. She is better off in a facility. You family needs to shut the heck up and quit harassing you. They can put their time instead in to taking your grandma to visit your mom.
I was confused why in comments ppl are hating on op for being nb. and then I realized they want their kid to be afab from what I understand they want to raise their kid to be a girl even if the kid is biologically male? 🤔
Definitely, that's made me go "guess she's messed up as well, maybe everything is made up and the only bad thing the mother did is to say that op shouldn't raise her child like that
Throughout the whole thing in the first story. My main focus was Op's baby being an AFAB but not assigning the gender at birth. By letting them decide when they are older will confused the heck outta the child and most likely they will get bullied. I know I am saying them/they but it's directed to anyone who is doing the same thing as what Op is doing to their child.
@@verakrot You only born with a d or v and you can't change it no matter how much you think you can😂 and telling kids that thinking process is acceptable is child abuse
![[Full Story] My Sister-in-Law is Planning a Wedding at My House And I'm Not Invited, But](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/5vQQ0Elu-mc/mqdefault.jpg)
![[Full Story] My Sister-in-Law is Planning a Wedding at My House And I'm Not Invited, But](/img/tr.png)
STORY ONE: Sometimes, you cannot save someone if they do not think that they need saving.
STORY TWO: Maybe OP shoud ask DW why she stays with him. "Becaues I love you" is probably the answer and, as incmprehensible as that apparently is to him, I advise him to honour her feelings and her desire to remain with him. Love is, after all, mostly about giving.
As for story 1, Given the mother's mental instability, and alcoholism, OP and her fiance should've flown to another state, had a marriage ceremony in a courthouse, and then, had a destination wedding, in the Caribbean, Europe, or on a cruise, or better yet, they should've eloped.😒
Receiving is the incomprehensible part.
When as in story one, things get THAT bad with a close relative, keeping a distance is not only good for the OP (and it definitely is OP needs this,) it is even good for OP's mother. OP's mother needs doctors and therapists now, not OP who is so emotionally traumatized they can't possibly see their mother without bias. Keep a distance and let there be healing. Maybe permanently if necessary. What OP can best do to help here is to protect and assist their sister, take her to coffee etc, and their grandmother. Their mother's mind is not operating properly anymore, and seeing OP might simply upset her. Support for the helpers seeing their mother is what she can best do right now.
Why is an apology always wanted to forgive everything ? Apologies are NOT a blanket forgiveness for everything , and does NOT make things better. People need to STOP asking for Apologies when what's actually needed is distance from these people, not giving into pleadings that contain "we're family, to keep the peace or stop being selfish ". Those phrases should lead to LC and NC , possibly even A RO or calling the POLICE and PRESSING CHARGES.
Well said. If OP wants to estrange herself from her mother, she needs to move with her beau to another state.
Story 1:
as the daughter of a sever alcoholic who chose to die via alcoholism, the first story hit fucking hard.
I remember when, at the age of 13, I visited my mother in the hospital, days before she died. She was way too far gone at that point. She was in a coma, she was bloated, and she was yellow, everywhere. she had no liver left.
Story 1: OP mother is the embodiment of a hot mess caught in a death spiral
2) Op ABSOLUTELY Loves her. Like...what?
Story 2: looks like a cheesy Chinese novel
Story 2) OP has imposter syndrome. I think it stems from him seeing his entire relationship stemming from a lie.
OP should read this post and comment to the MIL and see if he feels less burdened.
Ask if you can redo your vows.
Lmfao some of these people are disgusting..who thinks its alright to date their kids friends and saying OP doesn't hav anything to do with her mom relationship.
story2) you deserve her and she loves you, you help her all her life, she choose you, and you deserve it
None of you can care for your mother properly with all the medical issues she has now, especially not your grandmother. She is better off in a facility. You family needs to shut the heck up and quit harassing you. They can put their time instead in to taking your grandma to visit your mom.
I love the biker gang security!!!
Story 1: OP's mom is basically Jada Pinkett-Smith trailer park edition.
I was confused why in comments ppl are hating on op for being nb. and then I realized they want their kid to be afab
from what I understand they want to raise their kid to be a girl even if the kid is biologically male? 🤔
Story 1 was good until she said this at this time stamp 35:00 they setting their kid up for failure
Definitely, that's made me go "guess she's messed up as well, maybe everything is made up and the only bad thing the mother did is to say that op shouldn't raise her child like that
Banging the sons friend, wow what a mother, and the friend is definitely a mother F'er.
Throughout the whole thing in the first story. My main focus was Op's baby being an AFAB but not assigning the gender at birth. By letting them decide when they are older will confused the heck outta the child and most likely they will get bullied.
I know I am saying them/they but it's directed to anyone who is doing the same thing as what Op is doing to their child.
And ops Partner becomeing Trans was the cherry on top 😂😂 this child will have a heck of a live i Bet we will See them on Reddit in 14-16 years 😂
I only just started but thank you, now I remember this story and I’ll pass. That’s just abusive
@@Tpd2015IK It would be interesting to see in the future. That poor child
@@Catherine.Dorian. It is abusive. People who are like that are pretty much idiots in my opinion
@@Catherine.Dorian. how the fuck is it abusive
You can tell OP’s mom messed up since OP is labeled as “NB” lmao
Bru op is rlly saying her child will be "afab" and letting them decide, yeah no
Op literally nb, why are you surprised? And it's not bad, they gonna consider her a girl and just being open to their child saying otherwise
@@verakrot
You're born with a D or V you can't change that no matter how delusional you want to be This is just liberal brain rot
Yeah I called this type of stuff abuse doing it to your kid and mentally messing them up
@@verakrot
You only born with a d or v and you can't change it no matter how much you think you can😂 and telling kids that thinking process is acceptable is child abuse
@@cameron765 that's why you transphobs attacking bio woman right now and calling her trans? Deal with your own life before telling others how to live