Breaking: Biden Wins Arizona! Cyber Ninjas Audit Ends In Crushing Humiliation For GOP

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  • Опубликовано: 9 июн 2024
  • The Republican-led election audit in Maricopa County, Arizona, revealed no voter fraud and in fact found more votes for President Buden. Nonetheless, our former president is claiming victory. #Colbert #Comedy #Monologue
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Комментарии • 6 тыс.

  • @dmercury292
    @dmercury292 2 года назад +3208

    I’ve never seen a former POTUS lose the same election so many times.

    • @Kinseliplier
      @Kinseliplier 2 года назад +33

      He never really lost. They just lied about it.

    • @travis8947
      @travis8947 2 года назад +165

      @@Kinseliplier who lied, meth mouth?

    • @J.5.M.
      @J.5.M. 2 года назад +169

      @@Kinseliplier Yeah you're right. And at the end of every rainbow is a leprechaun and pot of gold

    • @dmercury292
      @dmercury292 2 года назад +134

      @@Kinseliplier, who’s “they?” The majority of Americans?

    • @serpico1616
      @serpico1616 2 года назад +167

      @@Kinseliplier

  • @ellasmommy9278
    @ellasmommy9278 2 года назад +479

    I hope to God Arizona makes Trump pay the bill for this. People of Arizona should not have to pay

    • @eacalvert
      @eacalvert 2 года назад +64

      Even if they did bill him, he wouldn't pay 🤣

    • @tyrellanderson4722
      @tyrellanderson4722 2 года назад +11

      Mmmm, they're Republicans.😬🤷🏾‍♂️

    • @gregbors8364
      @gregbors8364 2 года назад +15

      That’s what they get for electing a Republican state legislature. I hope they remember that next year

    • @deniseboldea1624
      @deniseboldea1624 2 года назад +22

      They should make the Arizona Republicans pay for the bill. They knew this was a sham.

    • @DarthTach
      @DarthTach 2 года назад +17

      Sorry. But the Governor is too busy sucking off T*** to worry about anything lowley like what his constituents wants.

  • @JanKoci
    @JanKoci 2 года назад +162

    "We won on a level you wouldn't believe!"
    "It was a negative win, a first in history!"

    • @nunyabusiness1406
      @nunyabusiness1406 2 года назад +4

      👍

    • @jamil2447
      @jamil2447 2 года назад +5

      Orange guy's first BIG loss was when his mob failed to hang the VP.

    • @johnnytorbett9883
      @johnnytorbett9883 2 года назад

      Trump won and will be back soon so sit and wait.youll see.....

    • @JWrenison
      @JWrenison 2 года назад +4

      @@johnnytorbett9883 Been waiting since January, dipstick

    • @jamil2447
      @jamil2447 2 года назад +2

      @@johnnytorbett9883 HA HAA HA HAAAA. Stop it, JT, you're too hilarious 😃

  • @jet7865
    @jet7865 2 года назад +57

    "We won at a level we wouldn’t believe” you got that right 😂

    • @ivanfalcon2411
      @ivanfalcon2411 2 года назад +1

      I'm 26 from Arizona and we didn't want Biden. Lol 😂😂😂 y'all looking crazy af man ....leave if you can , save face 👀

    • @ryanbeck7166
      @ryanbeck7166 2 года назад +4

      @@ivanfalcon2411 Well, the majority of Arizona voters, disagree with you.

    • @l-_-sage-_-l
      @l-_-sage-_-l 2 года назад

      Somehow Biden won, equalling more votes than registered voters! Makes sense, buddy. Also, it hasn't been proven either way if you have the facts & not just what moron talk show hosts tell you you wouldn't have commented.

    • @jet7865
      @jet7865 2 года назад +4

      @@ivanfalcon2411 oh really! Congratulations , because Biden is my president and yours, if you don’t like , move, we won’t come looking for you 😂

    • @tyrapp262
      @tyrapp262 2 года назад +1

      @@ivanfalcon2411 Arizona wanted Biden because he had more votes than Trump. Ninja Turtle Fraudit even confirmed it.

  • @ccccarriemchardy9216
    @ccccarriemchardy9216 2 года назад +369

    The cult leader needs to be held responsible for once in his life, come on DOJ!.

    • @arcturionblade1077
      @arcturionblade1077 2 года назад +12

      SDNY is working on it, so's the Attorney General over in Georgia.

    • @TheEvolver311
      @TheEvolver311 2 года назад +7

      It's a problem that people teather this stuff to "the cult leader" the GOP has been the party of the ethics of Timothy McVeigh and the ideology of the Turner Diaries for decades. Brainwashing isn't a actual thing Trump couldn't convince these people of something they didn't already have a willingness to accept.

    • @ccccarriemchardy9216
      @ccccarriemchardy9216 2 года назад +4

      @@TheEvolver311 You are right but by holding the head accountable (like others) makes the difference. It's a game of checks and balances. You do bad, you get punished.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

    • @manueldaniel108
      @manueldaniel108 2 года назад +2

      Yes jail time for traitor trump orgainsation

  • @mikeoxbig9392
    @mikeoxbig9392 2 года назад +340

    “Crushing Humiliation For GOP”
    The most beautiful words in the English language.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +1

      Also the most obvious phrase.

    • @JohnDoe-jh5yr
      @JohnDoe-jh5yr 2 года назад +17

      It would be a beautiful phrase if the GOP was capable of feeling humiliated.

    • @september29ification
      @september29ification 2 года назад

      Did you pay attention at all? Did you watch the entire 3 hour presentation, you didn't, if you did you would know that you don't know.

    • @Skrillex1212
      @Skrillex1212 2 года назад +5

      @Zach Ball wow, that was fast. So just to clarify.. There were mysterious extra votes for trump that didnt hold up and Biden really won, but Biden pulled out of the middle east poorly?
      If you want to play that, then what about syria? Honestly.

    • @TheLegendofphantom
      @TheLegendofphantom 2 года назад +2

      @Zach Ball WHAT????
      You mean ALL politicians are awful people who don't gaf about the lives of other human beings??
      But, but, but the TV said the ones using my favorite color are the "good guys"
      Why, my whole world is shattering right now 😱
      [Sarcasm Off]
      Yes. 95% of politicians are trash human beings who's only concern is putting money in their own pockets.
      If you think one group is on your side, you're being taken for a fool.

  • @javiernoriega7668
    @javiernoriega7668 2 года назад +196

    "Life is stranger than fiction" is an absolute understatement after watching the news and what goes on in the world on a daily basis.

    • @notfound5310
      @notfound5310 2 года назад

      what them focusing on some murder for 2 weeks instead of the riots and protests around the world against the mandates. nah keep on lapping it up.

    • @jamesl5302
      @jamesl5302 2 года назад +3

      @@notfound5310 well if more than 5 or 10 people showed up for these protests then people might pay more attention to them.

    • @bensonhildebrand5956
      @bensonhildebrand5956 2 года назад

      Maybe the Paper carrying sheep should go to Australia.

    • @skinnie2838
      @skinnie2838 2 года назад +1

      Hey look, more propaganda from the leftist shill Stephen Colbert. In regards to the Arizona audit. The mainstream media is trying to spin this as 'Biden won by a wider margin' and leftists all across social media are hailing this is a victory. This goes to show how dumb these people are.
      There is a difference, between an AUDIT, and a RECOUNT. The Arizona AUDIT showed that there were 50 THOUSAND suspicious ballots, JUST IN MARICOPA COUNTY, that still have not been analyzed yet. Once that happens we will know who really won Arizona. 50k sus ballots, now we just need a LEADER in Arizona to figure out what really happened with those SPECIFIC BALLOTS.
      Also around 390k ballots didnt even have the correct social security numbers attached. Brilliant. But yeah lets not have voter ID, all that would do, apparently, is force racism on people and totally not help to shore up our voting system so we could get an accurate count.
      Thats 50 thousand (390K without matching SSN#'s), at least, just in Maricopa county. Wonder how many suspicious ballots we had in the whole country?

    • @jamesl5302
      @jamesl5302 2 года назад +1

      @@skinnie2838 you do realize Cyber Ninjas had to make a statement proving that claim did not come from them, right? Did you bother to do any research before posting this?

  • @jabehauber
    @jabehauber 2 года назад +115

    "He is basically shoving the bishop up his butt and yelling, 'Yahtzee'!" Dead.

    • @sallieanngillen5874
      @sallieanngillen5874 2 года назад +1

      Hahahahaha hahahahaha!!

    • @MTMF.london
      @MTMF.london 2 года назад +4

      Jeez, stop it!! I can't un-see that image in my mind. lol

  • @cowtownokla
    @cowtownokla 2 года назад +31

    Can we get an audit on the 2016 presidential election?

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

  • @Ash-ow5yc
    @Ash-ow5yc 2 года назад +230

    I cannot believe I’m stuck in the dumbest timeline where this is STILL a major newsworthy headline 9 months later.
    How can I switch to a smarter timeline. Please.

    • @Kimberly-dt4ko
      @Kimberly-dt4ko 2 года назад +5

      You would need a time machine and the date of TFG's death. Make sure you land before the day of the funeral. Don't want to miss out on the first modern day funeral for a former president where not one person who held the office shows up.

    • @ichirogutierrez4014
      @ichirogutierrez4014 2 года назад +13

      Hahaha. I am in Japan and I started to believe in the "multiverse" when Trump won. I realized I am in the wrong dimension where humanity is getting dumber...

    • @arcturionblade1077
      @arcturionblade1077 2 года назад +4

      Blame Kang the Conqueror and the Time Variance Authority.

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 2 года назад +5

      Other time lines don't want this one anywhere near them.
      SO you're stuck.
      Sorry.

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 2 года назад +2

      @@ichirogutierrez4014 remember zippy the pinhead ?
      It's that kind of a bizzaro world.

  • @bennyboy7670
    @bennyboy7670 2 года назад +17

    “We know they are lying, they know they are lying, they know we know they are lying, we know they know we know they are lying, but they are still lying.”

  • @sealyoness
    @sealyoness 2 года назад +143

    I so want to congratulate Stephen's writers. They excelled with this monologue. My tummy hurts from laughing.

    • @martayking8694
      @martayking8694 2 года назад +3

      Yes we remember when the shows like Johnny had more class than this idiot , because he pushes his political views

    • @pnoyxxxbandido
      @pnoyxxxbandido 2 года назад

      No way they’re better than SNL

    • @pnoyxxxbandido
      @pnoyxxxbandido 2 года назад +1

      @Yuppy Guppy all of mainstream shows are propaganda. You didn’t get my humor

    • @ilovecops5499
      @ilovecops5499 2 года назад

      LOL! DOE SYOUE BRAIN HURT FROM NOT WORKING?

    • @pnoyxxxbandido
      @pnoyxxxbandido 2 года назад

      @Yuppy Guppy we all do

  • @jessetorres8738
    @jessetorres8738 2 года назад +88

    1 of my personal favorite things that came from the voting ballots in Arizona, Georgia, and a couple of other states is that many Republican voters did vote for the Republican Congressmen and Senators on the ballots, but they didn't vote for Trump himself, which is most likely what cost Trump the election.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

    • @jamil2447
      @jamil2447 2 года назад +4

      And the MAGA mob's attempt to take over California went down in flames!!! Bigly.

  • @ThomasNeal
    @ThomasNeal 2 года назад +87

    I love how they actually stopped using 45’s name 😂

    • @MD-vs9ff
      @MD-vs9ff 2 года назад +6

      It's been a while since Steve stopped. They've been asterisking it out in text too.

    • @mix3k818
      @mix3k818 Год назад

      ​@The Stammering Dunce That and the fact that mentioning him kept strengthening his position and arguably was the main reason Trump won the GOP primaries - he said one scandalous thing after another and made the majority of news stations talk about nothing but him, effectively stealing the attention from all the other candidates.

  • @cchurchill503
    @cchurchill503 2 года назад +6

    The REAL WINNERS: The Cyber Ninjas. What a scam, guys! Congrats!

    • @silverwolf2676
      @silverwolf2676 2 года назад

      Until the destruction of government property lawsuit comes in...

  • @sleepymushroom844
    @sleepymushroom844 2 года назад +14

    Gotta be honest: I forgot the AZ audit was still a thing 😂

    • @kevinv2877
      @kevinv2877 2 года назад +1

      It's a big thing to the cult followers. I always wondered, "Where is this evidence of voter fraud"??? Like legitimately I'd believe it did happen if it turned out humans weren't believing Meme's and you tube videos 🤦‍♂️. I was flabbergasted that the evidence really was Social media misinformation 😲😲....Like what??? Pushing voter fraud with posts from Uncle Dale😁😁Lol

  • @dianelipson5420
    @dianelipson5420 2 года назад +43

    When something is SO darn funny, you wake the house up at 4am to watch it, and nobody is pissed, because they’re all laughing too hard. This is the comedy we need to keep from going nuts in this world. Thanks man.

  • @Tuturial464
    @Tuturial464 2 года назад +653

    Let’s face it, this GOP is going to be held accountable for being the worst party in modern history

    • @marcob1729
      @marcob1729 2 года назад +55

      What accountability have you been seeing?

    • @Tuturial464
      @Tuturial464 2 года назад +8

      @@marcob1729 true. Being the biggest jerks

    • @mccormyke
      @mccormyke 2 года назад +11

      Americans may hold Russian funded Republican Party accountable but it looks like Democratic Party is far to Yellow to do more than wring their hands helplessly as per protocol & Democratic Party tradition.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +29

      I can respect the original Republican. At least they had principles. I long for people like John Mccain.

    • @whypothetical
      @whypothetical 2 года назад +15

      They won't be held accountable for a thing, unfortunately.

  • @Courageous91
    @Courageous91 2 года назад +11

    You know, for a guy who doesn't like to lose, 45 loses a LOT

  • @ToniGlick
    @ToniGlick 2 года назад +45

    I feel like we have 3 parties: Democrats, con artists and doorknobs.

    • @prime2955
      @prime2955 2 года назад +4

      Never met a doorknob that is self destructive. Doorknobs easily smarter.

    • @LucidLegend1984
      @LucidLegend1984 2 года назад +1

      ruclips.net/video/zUOLHrcj9I8/видео.html How's Afghanistan going?

    • @pauld8747
      @pauld8747 2 года назад

      And there's door knobs in every party!!

  • @GRAHFMETAL
    @GRAHFMETAL 2 года назад +610

    "I'd rather be dead than be called a soy boy cuck" is the hill that they're choosing to literally die on

    • @cisco8650
      @cisco8650 2 года назад +64

      I'm cool with that, actually.

    • @eb704
      @eb704 2 года назад +11

      Pathetic!

    • @dayaautum6983
      @dayaautum6983 2 года назад +44

      They must really want that Darwin award.

    • @lazerlord9324
      @lazerlord9324 2 года назад +55

      If they all die I will feel so owned

    • @dayaautum6983
      @dayaautum6983 2 года назад +40

      @@lazerlord9324 I would have to admit that Trump finally made America great again if they all died.

  • @IMelkor42
    @IMelkor42 2 года назад +456

    "We won by an amount you wouldn't believe" is a correct statement.
    Nobody would believe that you could win by a negative vote lead over your opponent...

    • @bethanyrishell2697
      @bethanyrishell2697 2 года назад +7

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @bethanyrishell2697
      @bethanyrishell2697 2 года назад +6

      Lmfaooooo #truth 🤣🤣🤣

    • @jeffsanders1609
      @jeffsanders1609 2 года назад +13

      The media doesn’t want you to actually read the report and instead just drink their lies
      The audit found “57,000 ballots with significant issues.” That’s more than Trump lost by. By a lot.
      Yet they couldn’t accurately say wether these ballots were illegal or not because the Dominion and the Maricopa County election board refused subpoenas and refused to cooperate in any way.
      Why? Why hide something if you have nothing to hide? That’s the truth of the audit

    • @jeffsanders1609
      @jeffsanders1609 2 года назад +10

      Why did Dominion and the Maricopa Election Board recuse suboenas by the audit?
      If they have nothing to hide why hide it? If everything was legal why not show it and prove it once and for all?
      But they didn’t because you only hide something if you have something to hide

    • @thomashiggins9320
      @thomashiggins9320 2 года назад +37

      @@jeffsanders1609 Holy crap!
      You are so mired in delusion, you can't even tell how delusional you are!

  • @danmallery9142
    @danmallery9142 2 года назад +7

    8:48 Funny how the "I'm a free spirited maverick" people need to be herded into a mall and be told exactly what to do. 😆

  • @2keyblades
    @2keyblades 2 года назад +34

    These “Cyber Ninjas” were probably trained by “The Shredder” and not “Splinter”

    • @chasthanhburns123
      @chasthanhburns123 2 года назад

      You are a puppet.

    • @whathell6t
      @whathell6t 2 года назад +2

      @@chasthanhburns123
      What are you talking about?

    • @kentaylor2416
      @kentaylor2416 2 года назад +2

      Most likely trained by the "sphincter".

    • @captainspaulding5963
      @captainspaulding5963 2 года назад +1

      I have a feeling they got some instruction from the My Pillow guy...

  • @seth3189
    @seth3189 2 года назад +13

    Who was that guy that Sleepy Joe told to shut up, and then took his job?

  • @toadjiang7626
    @toadjiang7626 2 года назад +899

    They say Trump will run again in 2024, not against Biden though, but democracy itself.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +44

      And just like the day after Jan. 6, he will lose.

    • @JohnDoe-jh5yr
      @JohnDoe-jh5yr 2 года назад +38

      He already did exactly that on January 6th. It was a premeditated plan to stay in power.

    • @jerryrichardson2799
      @jerryrichardson2799 2 года назад +9

      Pretty much...

    • @JAT-qr8eq
      @JAT-qr8eq 2 года назад +57

      They also say that Biden is too old at 78yr...but they're okay with Trump at 78yr in 2024. 🤔

    • @MyMarsham
      @MyMarsham 2 года назад +49

      @@JAT-qr8eq well, biologically, but his mental age is four.

  • @jwfitnesscoaching3670
    @jwfitnesscoaching3670 2 года назад +8

    I f*cking love this dude. If I need a laugh, Steven never fails 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @tomriggle3217
    @tomriggle3217 2 года назад +4

    Does that also include the 70,000 duplicate

  • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
    @georgeb.wolffsohn30 2 года назад +75

    I have to admit that I never thought Cyber Ninjas would affirm Biden's win.

    • @sv2697
      @sv2697 2 года назад +6

      They will be in deep shit if they try to lie and get caught changing 10,000+ votes.

    • @jacqdanieles
      @jacqdanieles 2 года назад +8

      Trumptards: the Deep State rigged the re-re-recount. 😁

    • @gregbors8364
      @gregbors8364 2 года назад +8

      They got paid $6 million and they got access to lots of personal info they can now sell. It worked out pretty well for them

    • @sv2697
      @sv2697 2 года назад +6

      @@gregbors8364 good point, they just got million of confidential information.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

  • @gosnooky
    @gosnooky 2 года назад +41

    I love how they redact his name and how he refuses to even say his name.

    • @BullShitThat
      @BullShitThat 2 года назад +2

      OMG I *love* your profile pic!! I completely forgot about that incident 😂🤣😂

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

    • @crazyknarf
      @crazyknarf 2 года назад

      IMO because there might be another reason, back in the day Trump licensed his likeness and name so every time someone on TV/radio says his name, Trump makes money on his name and or brand.
      Why so many Trump flags? Because Trump is grifting his own supporters to pay for the cheapest flags made in China.
      And every flag with his name made him money. Talk about grifting and conning dumbest of people, Trump supporters.

    • @hildeschmid8400
      @hildeschmid8400 2 года назад +1

      Same here. As long as we say his name he will be a boil on America's a$$

  • @jeffreyglenellen1188
    @jeffreyglenellen1188 2 года назад +10

    Wonder how many of the “protesters” got a little extra in their meals? I heard the employees were not too happy with the situation. Bon Appetite😂

  • @billross7245
    @billross7245 2 года назад +2

    Mistaking the online voter registration website as a site connected to the voting machines, what level of incompetence.

  • @gagatube
    @gagatube 2 года назад +40

    They wanted a recount, then an audit, then an audit of the recount, then a recount of the audit of the recount... what I want to know is where was the guy who says 'insanity is repeating the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome'? Was he on sabbatical?

    • @rasmusazu
      @rasmusazu 2 года назад

      At least they're creating jobs.. I think?

  • @Kalandra86
    @Kalandra86 2 года назад +27

    I’m actually surprised the cyber ninjas did a thorough job and reported honestly even though it didn’t support their hypothesis that orangutan won. We’ll done.

    • @ryanembry9875
      @ryanembry9875 2 года назад +14

      I think at the end of the day they just wanted to get paid and not get sued and go to prison for fraud. They collected on the job either way, safer to just give the facts and bounce

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

    • @ascent8487
      @ascent8487 2 года назад +3

      So am I. I figured they’d cheat. Also, aren’t they the MAGA list of traitors now? Aren’t they about to get death threats?

    • @yaceya
      @yaceya 2 года назад +2

      They didn't report honestly. Because after telling the results they essentially told "but we still don't trust it, make some new voter restriction laws".

    • @Kalandra86
      @Kalandra86 2 года назад

      @@yaceya Really? Damn, still on brand idiots. 😞

  • @guilegameche3810
    @guilegameche3810 2 года назад +57

    "He's not playing tridimensional chess; he's not even playing regular chess : he is just shoving the bishop up his butt and yelling 'Yahtzee'!"

    • @JLF201
      @JLF201 2 года назад +5

      Best line of the clip, I think.

    • @Rugelacharugula
      @Rugelacharugula 2 года назад +3

      I made a sound bit outta that one.

  • @goldcicvibefel9966
    @goldcicvibefel9966 2 года назад +2

    CYBER-NINJAS DOING A VOTE AUDIT, that's all I really needed to hear.

  • @phoenix5054
    @phoenix5054 2 года назад +93

    "You're gonna get tired of winning." This statement makes sense now.

    • @michaelrunco5940
      @michaelrunco5940 2 года назад +1

      LMAO! You win the internet for today.

    • @notfound5310
      @notfound5310 2 года назад

      -didnt look at the audit

    • @senavicente
      @senavicente 2 года назад +3

      @@notfound5310 who did? The reptilians? Q? The annonaki? 4chan? 8chan?!?!?!?!?

    • @dark14life
      @dark14life 2 года назад +3

      @@notfound5310 if the audit showed anything other than Biden winning, you morons would be shoving the evidence in our faces. So far, the only thing we've seen is that Biden won Arizona. Again.

  • @desibrown9303
    @desibrown9303 2 года назад +16

    A great ending line... "They're all as smart as a bag of door knobs". Love it!

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

  • @jennifersmith4864
    @jennifersmith4864 2 года назад +1

    GUTFELD! --- crushing Colbert.

  • @momcatwoo
    @momcatwoo 2 года назад +2

    “Bag of Doorknobs” would be a great Republican inaugural band.

  • @bokani79
    @bokani79 2 года назад +288

    “Real estate agent who wouldn’t tell you someone died in the house because she is the killer” I’m dead 😂😂😂😂😂

    • @jaimicottrill2831
      @jaimicottrill2831 2 года назад +17

      Well, at least we know who your killer is! 😂

    • @capstonepropertyadvisors8658
      @capstonepropertyadvisors8658 2 года назад +7

      I lost it at that. I wonder how he comes up with those lines. She does look like a real estate agent who deceives potential buyers.

    • @nichaalmeida983
      @nichaalmeida983 2 года назад +3

      @@capstonepropertyadvisors8658 he doesn't. He's got writers to help him out, just like all the other late night hosts do.

    • @Mo-oz6ed
      @Mo-oz6ed 2 года назад

      I piss on myself from laughter

    • @kimberlygiacometti6041
      @kimberlygiacometti6041 2 года назад

      THAT MADE NO SENSE.

  • @michaelrockwell4730
    @michaelrockwell4730 2 года назад +365

    I totally understand why Trump supporters act so delusional. It's gotta be embarrassing af to live in the real world as a Trump supporter.

    • @sea_triscuit7980
      @sea_triscuit7980 2 года назад +19

      Why are they so loud and proud about their stupidity and ignorance though? Idk it doesn't check out. I feel like shame is their fuel though at this point so maybe you're right

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +12

      Play stupid games, lose the election.

    • @TheLegendofphantom
      @TheLegendofphantom 2 года назад +8

      Pride is a mf

    • @adamo3561
      @adamo3561 2 года назад +6

      Be worse to be a Biden supporter. At least trumps not controlled

    • @yxeaviationphotog
      @yxeaviationphotog 2 года назад +34

      @@adamo3561 *Vladimir Putin has entered the chat*

  • @rugby_jtizzle
    @rugby_jtizzle 2 года назад +3

    This monologue slayed!!! So freakin good 😂

  • @Scott-kc5fg
    @Scott-kc5fg 2 года назад +2

    I love Colbert's take on current events.

  • @jonb914
    @jonb914 2 года назад +126

    "So if everyone else was jumping off a cliff would you do it?"
    "No! I would jump off the cliff if everyone else told me not to!"
    -Breitbart guy

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

    • @jeffsanders1609
      @jeffsanders1609 2 года назад +1

      The media doesn’t want you to actually read the report and instead just drink their lies
      The audit found “57,000 ballots with significant issues.” That’s more than Trump lost by. By a lot.
      Yet they couldn’t accurately say wether these ballots were illegal or not because the Dominion and the Maricopa County election board refused subpoenas and refused to cooperate in any way.
      Why? Why hide something if you have nothing to hide? That’s the truth of the audit

    • @thomashiggins9320
      @thomashiggins9320 2 года назад +4

      @@jeffsanders1609 Holy crap!
      You are so mired in delusion, you can't even tell how delusional you are!
      (See, I can cut and paste, too, fool....)

    • @jeffsanders1609
      @jeffsanders1609 2 года назад +1

      @@thomashiggins9320 why did Dominion and the Maricopa County Election Board refuse to cooperate? Why not prove the election was fair and legal if it was? Why hide something if they had nothing to hide?
      That’s the story of the audit

    • @jeffsanders1609
      @jeffsanders1609 2 года назад +1

      @@thomashiggins9320 and yea I am spreading the truth in defiance of the media’s lies. Thank you for noticing

  • @michaelzedd2540
    @michaelzedd2540 2 года назад +181

    1:18 “This adit is a crushing humiliation for the GOP…” Unfortunately, no. The prerequisite for humiliation is the ability to accept reality. So long as they can pretend reality isn’t real, they are immune to feelings of humiliation.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

    • @brianwalsh1401
      @brianwalsh1401 2 года назад +9

      They are shameless of their behavior. They don't cringe at anything they do. If they had healthy shame or cringe they couldn't do the the things they do.

    • @lisajean228
      @lisajean228 2 года назад +2

      Sadly true

    • @climateteacherjohnj7763
      @climateteacherjohnj7763 2 года назад +1

      💥 Ya!

    • @Richard_Nickerson
      @Richard_Nickerson 2 года назад

      audit*

  • @jaywulf
    @jaywulf 2 года назад +18

    Remember when your parents said; "If Billy told you to jump out of the window, would you jump too?"
    Apparently the Trumpistas and GoP had to think about it for a couple of decades before anwsering "Yes".

    • @tabo01
      @tabo01 2 года назад

      lemmings over the cliff

  • @controllerforce_50East
    @controllerforce_50East 2 года назад +1

    In his own favorite words.... YO ASS IS FIRED.

  • @ImperfectXIII
    @ImperfectXIII 2 года назад +130

    "I like Republican presidents who win re-election."
    OHHHHHHHH SNAP LIZZY GIRL

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

    • @cv8683
      @cv8683 2 года назад +2

      Thats not a snap at trump its a snapshot of her character the truth is she would still be supporting him if she found it politically expedient. She has only come out against trump to bolster her own presidential run liz cheany is no hero .

    • @pampack9930
      @pampack9930 2 года назад

      @@cv8683 you don't know her. You don't know what she has done. Shut up

    • @isntitabeautifulday1648
      @isntitabeautifulday1648 2 года назад +2

      @@cv8683 I don't think she's a hero, but her one-liner is gold. Try it yourself next time.

    • @troyjardine5850
      @troyjardine5850 2 года назад

      I haven't seen a brun that bad since white phosphorus was dropped on Iraqi civilians

  • @geared4war
    @geared4war 2 года назад +236

    "..pinched out a column" deserves another gruddamn Emmy.

    • @ross-carlson
      @ross-carlson 2 года назад +12

      Yeah, I caught that too - EPIC.
      Doctor: I see you're dying of Covid, are you vaccinated?
      Republican: Fuck no, I'm OWNING THOSE LIBTAR.....
      Doctor: Sir?
      Doctor: Sir are you dead?
      Doctor: Who was he owning again, oh well call the morgue...

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

    • @malavoy1
      @malavoy1 2 года назад +1

      Sounds like he needs more Metamucil. 😁😁

    • @joeverna5459
      @joeverna5459 2 года назад +3

      I caught that. Suttle but deadly. Lol

  • @fdshands2663
    @fdshands2663 2 года назад +1

    The people of Arizona should be ashamed of themselves for having it shown yet again that they knew what they were doing running an election.

  • @tommyt1971
    @tommyt1971 2 года назад +4

    Meyers said “Cyber Ninjas” sounded like a generic action figure that your gramma found in a dollar store but insists is just as good as an official doll.

  • @Muhdah1972
    @Muhdah1972 2 года назад +48

    I cried laughing when they reported additional votes for Biden 🙌👏👏👏❤️

    • @williamcarcahe5997
      @williamcarcahe5997 2 года назад

      You real going to cried when he win again. Take the bad ballots and Trump win.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

    • @masonkanterbury3007
      @masonkanterbury3007 2 года назад +2

      Trump lost by a landslide. In November all around the so called Trump country, Biden signs were copious. No one was honking for the trump flag holders. But they were honking like crazy for the Biden sign holders.

  • @dafttool
    @dafttool 2 года назад +260

    *The Tyrannical Toddler got thoroughly spanked,*
    *History anointing him America’s lowest ranked.*
    *Now he’s been given an extended timeout,*
    *To ponder what he did wrong, and to pout.*

    • @hmq9052
      @hmq9052 2 года назад +7

      Er, no. He's telling everyone he won.

    • @dafttool
      @dafttool 2 года назад +28

      @@hmq9052
      *Delusional Donnie is in utter denial*
      *Not getting how deeply he’s reviled,*
      *An egomaniacal narcissistic sociopath,*
      *Oblivious to facts in the election’s aftermath.*

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +5

      But he likes getting spanked!

    • @IMSiegfried
      @IMSiegfried 2 года назад +5

      @@dafttool kudos

    • @dafttool
      @dafttool 2 года назад +7

      @@couragekarnga8735 correct ✅
      *Raw Dawg Spanky had a secret tryst,*
      *With an infant son ensconced at home.*
      *Just add another name to a long list,*
      *Of times a scoundrel lied to bury his bone*

  • @randomjoe3941
    @randomjoe3941 2 года назад +2

    It's sad to see so many mindless drones cheering and parroting without question.
    If you haven't investigated yourself then you don't realize when you're being lied to.

    • @platosghost8891
      @platosghost8891 2 года назад

      "do your own research." is a cop out for people without proof.

  • @hilpei3675
    @hilpei3675 2 года назад +3

    Messing with the machines was probably the real goal of the cyber ninja audit in the first place.

    • @tabo01
      @tabo01 2 года назад

      the 6 million but data mining.

  • @canadalynx
    @canadalynx 2 года назад +41

    Anyone remember that time when flat earthers spent like a million dollars and accidentally proved the earth is round? Yeah….

    • @crutherfordmusic
      @crutherfordmusic 2 года назад

      The earth isn't a globe, Trump won Arizona, and Jesus is raised from the dead.

  • @janesmith716
    @janesmith716 2 года назад +63

    I'm so happy Colbert refuses to say the orange orangutans name.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

    • @fritzhaselnuss7852
      @fritzhaselnuss7852 2 года назад +3

      totally with him on that, that guy deoesnt "deserve" to be mentioned in anything but general terms

  • @mikaelbiilmann6826
    @mikaelbiilmann6826 2 года назад +1

    Liz Cheney + GW Bush = Dana Carvey!
    The resemblance was uncanny! 🤣

  • @jenifferrose3084
    @jenifferrose3084 2 года назад +1

    I live in Az and YOU should have waited until the FINAL RESULTS CAME OUT. INCOMPETENT IS JUST YOUR WAY THOUGH RIGHT? 🤣

  • @Dayandcounting
    @Dayandcounting 2 года назад +36

    Cyber Ninjas only had 1 employee the CEO until 2020, no known customers base either.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +1

      It sounds like a bad superhero movie.

    • @okkietrooy6841
      @okkietrooy6841 2 года назад

      And now earning a lot of money for a bad job. But getting several new projects.
      Is this capitalism? You get riche If you do a bad job?

    • @JohnDoe-jh5yr
      @JohnDoe-jh5yr 2 года назад +3

      It could also be that you just couldn't see them.

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 2 года назад

      @@okkietrooy6841 good enough for gommint work.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

  • @farhanahmed2508
    @farhanahmed2508 2 года назад +160

    To the red states:
    "If the truth kills them,
    Let them die."
    - Immanuel Kant

    • @stuadams968
      @stuadams968 2 года назад +4

      Brandon is HOT. Put him on the show.

    • @AkshayKumar-ue1fp
      @AkshayKumar-ue1fp 2 года назад +2

      Everyone knows epstien was a democrat and had his dem friends on his pedo island always

    • @lizardog
      @lizardog 2 года назад +11

      @@AkshayKumar-ue1fp everyone knows Donald and Melania partied with Epstein and procuress Maxwell.

    • @tedtoosie4250
      @tedtoosie4250 2 года назад

      Which is why the Biden’s have their own neighboring island

    • @AkshayKumar-ue1fp
      @AkshayKumar-ue1fp 2 года назад +1

      @@lizardog Is they why Trump banned Epstein from his properties? Then why did bill Clinton flew in lolita express 100s of times?

  • @jamiemcculloch3242
    @jamiemcculloch3242 2 года назад +1

    LOL, thank you guys for the comments, best comedy around right now... the recount is not the issue... friggin geniuses

  • @devinnall2284
    @devinnall2284 2 года назад +1

    Colbert: The Windows are fake!
    Me: Says the guy standing in front of fake windows.

  • @davidwalker4684
    @davidwalker4684 2 года назад +257

    The degree to which Trump is a full on sociopath is genuinely frightening at times. The total lack of shame is kinda a powerful asset for him. If a percentage of the US population will believe him above all other sources his ability to twist the truth to an infinite extent can do great damage.

    • @exessex3522
      @exessex3522 2 года назад +20

      "Can do" and "has already done".

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

    • @Tonyhouse1168
      @Tonyhouse1168 2 года назад +10

      A percentage already believes him. It’s all just sad.

    • @cacoethes1366
      @cacoethes1366 2 года назад +23

      Oh he’s way beyond a sociopath. He’s a Malignant Narcissist. It’s sickening.

    • @andreasandremyrvold
      @andreasandremyrvold 2 года назад +13

      He should be held personally accountable for thousands of deaths in his non-handling of the pandemic.

  • @PJServo
    @PJServo 2 года назад +245

    Ah yes Trump still loses Arizona even with that Audit. You just know that somewhere from up above that John McCain is smiling & laughing his head off. ;)

    • @cathieludemann5879
      @cathieludemann5879 2 года назад +22

      Not only did he STILL lose, but he lost by more votes than originally thought! 😁

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

    • @Churro_Flaminguez
      @Churro_Flaminguez 2 года назад +12

      If Trump and his cronies/enablers were more competent, American democracy might be in tatters right now.
      They are so petty, power-hungry, incompetent and cowardly that they couldn't even own their failed insurrection all the way. Jan. 6 was really Antifa and the FBI, see.
      Trumpanzees are literally the bottom of the barrel of human civilization after criminals and sociopaths.

    • @billycloudy9078
      @billycloudy9078 2 года назад +6

      @@cathieludemann5879 Yeah the same thing happened here in Wisconsin when they did a recount in Dane and Milwaukee counties and turns out that Biden got another 143 votes that they miss placed somewhere and Donny boy lost 91 or something… or maybe he gained it I don’t remember it’s just all really silly!!

    • @cathieludemann5879
      @cathieludemann5879 2 года назад +6

      @@billycloudy9078 Yes, it is rather silly. Except that the audits cost a lot of money and take people away from their regular jobs. Maybe that's the point? Distract people from their jobs and waste money of the cities and states. Make governing more difficult. Donnie must love it. 😝 ☹️

  • @KittySnicker
    @KittySnicker 2 года назад +10

    “Have yourself a very strongly Christmas.” Between that and the Ninja bit, I love this nutty episode ❤️😅

  • @dbcocktails
    @dbcocktails 2 года назад +1

    The Yahtzee joke made me laugh out loud!

  • @fahadkelantan
    @fahadkelantan 2 года назад +59

    "Destroy democracy, or I release the piss tapes".... your friend. Vlad.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

    • @aztn19
      @aztn19 2 года назад +8

      Honestly at this point, even the pee tapes won’t ruin the MAGA supporters affection for him. It’ll become their new fetish that they’ll love

  • @kwokmanchung
    @kwokmanchung 2 года назад +20

    Told you cyber ninja wouldn't find you bamboo. You needed cyber panda.

    • @tyrapp262
      @tyrapp262 2 года назад

      Turtles are better in finding sea weed or pond flies.

    • @lisagulick4144
      @lisagulick4144 2 года назад

      No, because Cyber Panda eats shoots and leaves.

  • @sherrywhittlin3749
    @sherrywhittlin3749 2 года назад +9

    God, Stephen's cute. Not to mention brilliant and talented. He saved us in 2020. Thank you SC.

  • @theadventuresofjp444
    @theadventuresofjp444 2 года назад +11

    I just wanna know if Colbert's head of research is single and available?!

    • @bastiandantilus
      @bastiandantilus 2 года назад

      @Scott Leishman That's true of all men, so why point it out here? You just suuuuper closeted or a bigot?

  • @williamtemple4331
    @williamtemple4331 2 года назад +29

    If I still lived in Apache Junction you can rest assured that I would be bringing a civil suit against the cyber ninjas for the cost of replacing any government property loss in their fiasco. I hope some progressive and forward thinking citizen in Maricopa will think the same.

  • @thomasdarling2553
    @thomasdarling2553 2 года назад +24

    Phew, I was so worried Arizona would flip to the Republicans.

    • @drwatsonca6945
      @drwatsonca6945 2 года назад +5

      Remember the election is over and can't flip to anyone.

    • @Nitro1000
      @Nitro1000 2 года назад +3

      John McCain’s revenge

    • @Nicoder6884
      @Nicoder6884 2 года назад +1

      @@drwatsonca6945 it was sarcasm

    • @virginiatyree6705
      @virginiatyree6705 2 года назад +3

      😂😂😂😂 Me2, glad Joe won AGAIN. v

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

  • @DedicatedSlaya
    @DedicatedSlaya 2 года назад +1

    I don't know if I can continue to laugh so hard!!! Classic!!! 🤣🤣🤣

  • @tonymaurice4157
    @tonymaurice4157 2 года назад +2

    "I got hairy legs that turn blonde in the sun"- Joe Biden

  • @shermanculbertson6244
    @shermanculbertson6244 2 года назад +757

    Trump is losing at a level I can’t believe.

  • @sciencenate
    @sciencenate 2 года назад +84

    9:29 Jon Batiste has such a golden heart. He even feels bad for a PRETEND kid with asthma.

    • @michaelcorreia1175
      @michaelcorreia1175 2 года назад

      I don't know, man; he seems more upset at a fictional student with a fidget spinner up their ass...
      ruclips.net/video/wcnqdr1Tk9o/видео.html

    • @juliahoward937
      @juliahoward937 2 года назад

      He is a New Orleanian.

  • @michaelclennan8425
    @michaelclennan8425 2 года назад +1

    The world 🌎 laughing at us.

  • @JustJanitor
    @JustJanitor 2 года назад +1

    Thanks i spit out my coffee 😂😂😂

  • @gregoryhendricks63
    @gregoryhendricks63 2 года назад +9

    This monologue is on fire 🔥 Stephen is on a roll

  • @Godric_71
    @Godric_71 2 года назад +170

    Stephen: He's not playing 3d chess. He's not even playing regular chess. He's just shoving the Bishop up his ass and yelling YATZEE.
    Me: 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

    • @davidgray8089
      @davidgray8089 2 года назад +5

      Damn, I laughed hard when I read Yatzee. Well done.

    • @michelleportch6227
      @michelleportch6227 2 года назад +5

      Well that settles it. I’m never playing chess again.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/MbtE36xbMPQ/видео.html

    • @JohnDoe-jh5yr
      @JohnDoe-jh5yr 2 года назад

      @@michelleportch6227 Or Yahtzee

  • @tracycrawford6826
    @tracycrawford6826 2 года назад

    Killing it Mr. Colbert!

  • @Auguur
    @Auguur 2 года назад +1

    I've never played that version of Yahtzee, and don't ever want to

  • @SRowntree
    @SRowntree 2 года назад +69

    Congratulations to President-Elect Biden!

    • @gregbors8364
      @gregbors8364 2 года назад +2

      Don’t celebrate yet. My Pillow Guy says Trump will be back by Thanksgiving 🤪

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

  • @brianalexander8335
    @brianalexander8335 2 года назад +37

    “Those are fake windows..” says Colbert as he’s standing in front of a fake window…

    • @Tropicallyglutenfree
      @Tropicallyglutenfree 2 года назад +4

      Takes one to know one.

    • @Tropicallyglutenfree
      @Tropicallyglutenfree 2 года назад +2

      @@fortybelow1973 not coming up with anything. Just saying Stephen knows a fake window..👀

    • @fortybelow1973
      @fortybelow1973 2 года назад

      @@Tropicallyglutenfree I thought you were mocking S Colbert. Sorry. I shall delete my comment. Thank you for setting me straight.

    • @Tropicallyglutenfree
      @Tropicallyglutenfree 2 года назад +2

      @@fortybelow1973 no problem 🫂

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

  • @lypscratch
    @lypscratch 2 года назад +6

    "Nolte pinched out a column..." Oh, that is so so good. Stealing that verb for many people's posts.

  • @nancyr137
    @nancyr137 2 года назад +1

    I'll never play Yahtzee again.

  • @grahammewburn
    @grahammewburn 2 года назад +5

    Mary Trump says Donald is unable to say he lost.

  • @extraincomesuz
    @extraincomesuz 2 года назад +8

    I can't eat lunch while watching Colbert .... I almost choked laughing about ..well everything.🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/RaHw6ElcHD0/видео.html

    • @ascent8487
      @ascent8487 2 года назад

      Be careful!

  • @daniellarsson6281
    @daniellarsson6281 2 года назад

    You realy deserve what happenings to your country. The world is laufhing. Blessings from Sweden

  • @mcd5778
    @mcd5778 2 года назад +1

    The propaganda of the oligarchy is funny. Enjoy the ride Colbert.

  • @laskey2175
    @laskey2175 2 года назад +270

    Democrats: "Everyone take this life saving medicine and live!"
    Republicans: "Damn lib can't tell me what to do."

    • @ferox965
      @ferox965 2 года назад +8

      People have actually said that to me.

    • @danielgehring7437
      @danielgehring7437 2 года назад +13

      You gotta love the 'reverse psychology' line. So you're mad that the Dems are 'tricking' you into not taking the life-saving medication... and yet aren't taking the life-saving medication?

    • @grammarofficerkrupke4398
      @grammarofficerkrupke4398 2 года назад +3

      My friends dad died from that "life saving medicine".

    • @eclectrickery8077
      @eclectrickery8077 2 года назад +26

      @@grammarofficerkrupke4398 That's a lie. You don't have any friends.

    • @danielgehring7437
      @danielgehring7437 2 года назад +14

      @@grammarofficerkrupke4398 Alternate theory, no they didn't.
      Also, *friend's, Grammar Officer Krupke.

  • @EvilJawa
    @EvilJawa 2 года назад +18

    And yet Trump said at a rally they proved he won. It's like arguing that water is not wet.

    • @nagranoth_
      @nagranoth_ 2 года назад +1

      Thing is... when you're arguing water isn't wet you're actually right at some level; individual water molecules aren't, it's the interaction between molecules that creates wetness. Trump is wrong at all levels.

  • @fiatlux805
    @fiatlux805 2 года назад

    I think our country needs unity more than pointing out flaws in republican/democratic parties.

  • @rolandixor
    @rolandixor 2 года назад +1

    Do these people not see how childish they look?

  • @laskey2175
    @laskey2175 2 года назад +3

    HAHAHA! Do you think they will audit again? Cyber ninjas was about as partisan as they could make it.

  • @MrJoshanthony734313
    @MrJoshanthony734313 2 года назад +63

    Of all the hosts, he's the best performer. That second city training...

    • @JadeValour
      @JadeValour 2 года назад +3

      And definitely the funniest 🤣

    • @MrJoshanthony734313
      @MrJoshanthony734313 2 года назад +2

      @@JadeValour I really love the Corden platform. Seth Meyers is great because it reminds me of weekend update. My kids like Fallon, but whatever late night is a tradition. Colbert, best of the best.

    • @resikchanel843
      @resikchanel843 2 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/yQBnPT2rX2g/видео.html

    • @nitschtr2708
      @nitschtr2708 2 года назад +1

      But he‘s got the most annoying audience of all… IMO it was much better when there was none. He could simply deliver his monologue and wasn‘t being interrupted after every single sentence.

  • @Ratboy2004
    @Ratboy2004 2 года назад

    I was expecting "choking the bishop"... LMAO ... Listen for the wheezing.

  • @asl2221
    @asl2221 2 года назад +1

    The head of research saying "yes" was my favorite part. Pretty