Instantly BOOST Your Charisma |

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  • Опубликовано: 15 май 2022
  • One of the simplest ways to increase your perceived charisma is…⁣
    to PAUSE!⁣

    Studies demonstrate that charismatic people are supportive, sensitive, nurturing, and considerate. Not only that, they also exude a mysterious, almost intangible quality that’s a unique combination of quiet confidence, credibility and presence. ⁣

    When they enter a room, people look.⁣
    When they talk, people want to listen.⁣

    And the best part about charisma is that you can develop it. ⁣

    One simple way to develop charisma through your presence and perceived confidence starts with how you communicate. ⁣
    Next time you’re interacting with someone, see if you can pause for 2-3 seconds before responding. ⁣

    I call it the 3SP - 3 Second Pause.⁣

    Of course, you’ll still want to maintain eye contact so they know you’re paying attention, and you want to have an engaged look on your face - a blank stare will probably raise some eyebrows and might even prompt an “are you ok??”… You can even take a small breath before you speak so you ‘audience’ knows something’s coming…⁣

    This is a particularly useful skill when in interviews, on panels or when presenting in public and answering questions. ⁣

    Have you ever seen anyone use this and what did you think? ⁣
    Or have you used it? How did you find it? 👇⁣





    📚 ⁣
    -House, R. J., & Howell, J. M. (1992). Personality and charismatic leadership. The Leadership Quarterly, 3(2), 81-108.⁣
    -De Cremer, D., & Van Knippenberg, D. (2002). How do leaders promote cooperation? The effects of charisma and procedural fairness. Journal of Applied Psychology, 87(5), 858.⁣
    -Tskhay, K. O., Zhu, R., Zou, C., & Rule, N. O. (2018). Charisma in everyday life: Conceptualization and validation of the General Charisma Inventory. Journal of personality and social psychology, 114(1), 131.
    #shorts
    ____________________
    To find out more about Shadé, visit the website: www.shadezahrai.com
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Комментарии • 698

  • @WorldBeater123
    @WorldBeater123 Год назад +2143

    Imagine two friends having a conversation and each one waiting 3 seconds to answer every time a question is asked 🤣🤣🤣

    • @doit7779
      @doit7779 Год назад +96

      Same Like the indian dramas . 😂😂

    • @neonyoutobe5405
      @neonyoutobe5405 Год назад +55

      @@doit7779 Demtananana deem tanana a
      Doom tanana doom tana Nana ....
      Graphics 😂🤣🤣

    • @babypenkinese
      @babypenkinese Год назад +27

      That definitely happens when you’re as high as a kite.

    • @mauricioesma
      @mauricioesma Год назад +26

      (Waits 3 seconds)
      Right!?

    • @steepdeej
      @steepdeej Год назад +24

      If this was your first thought that came to mind after this video I don’t think you got the point. Maybe, I dunno you. We’ll see

  • @romeshbhat8362
    @romeshbhat8362 Год назад +378

    My wife asked if I love her, I tried 3SP.
    Now I cook my own food

  • @abba3629
    @abba3629 Год назад +71

    6SP = Double Charisma.
    9SP = Triple Charisma.
    12SP = Quadruple Charisma..., Keep going for 24 hours = Full day of Peace & Absolute Charisma.

  • @brucewayne2184
    @brucewayne2184 Год назад +839

    Person: *does a 3 second pause*
    Me: *walks away because I think they're done talking*

  • @smallfootprint2961
    @smallfootprint2961 2 года назад +276

    Yes. You don't have to jump into everone's talk. Being patient, and waiting to respond is wonderful... and if I am talking with someone who is constantly interrupting... i can let them talk. I can let that person who needs to talk, talk. It's my gift.

    • @Catthepunk
      @Catthepunk Год назад +10

      So charismatic.

    • @ambriaashley3383
      @ambriaashley3383 Год назад

      Same.

    • @pawelpawlowin95
      @pawelpawlowin95 9 месяцев назад +2

      You're speaking to slow. I would left the room if you talked to me like that.

    • @joniman6899
      @joniman6899 9 месяцев назад +5

      @@pawelpawlowin95 work on your patience

    • @pawelpawlowin95
      @pawelpawlowin95 9 месяцев назад +2

      @@joniman6899 Sorry I was high when I wrote that

  • @ratnak5370
    @ratnak5370 2 года назад +2339

    Me who can't even collect my thoughts in 5 minutes 😭
    Edit: Thanks for 1.2k likes

    • @armandodemiguel7989
      @armandodemiguel7989 2 года назад +179

      I tend to have the correct answer when in bed, 5 hours later.

    • @peaceman97amd97
      @peaceman97amd97 2 года назад +6

      😂

    • @abdotp
      @abdotp Год назад +5

      🤣🤣🤣 me too man

    • @Shamuto7
      @Shamuto7 Год назад +31

      Started looking creepy staring silently for 5mins

    • @pubududanansooriya3548
      @pubududanansooriya3548 Год назад +5

      Bring it up guys, these conditions can be improved. 💪

  • @superkowstar
    @superkowstar Год назад +65

    I can’t stop looking at her hair ❤

    • @Onmysheet
      @Onmysheet 5 месяцев назад

      And her.....assets

  • @sihamben2806
    @sihamben2806 Год назад +12

    I use this technique naturally just so I can collect my thoughts and have better response. 👌🏼 nailed it

  • @lokeshdubey
    @lokeshdubey 2 года назад +110

    I’m using this in my fights with wifey! I can think of better comebacks now

  • @yehfish88
    @yehfish88 2 года назад +10

    This is true. I always make “um…well” sort of fill-in words before answering. I do find people that use the 3SP tip really attractive and professional. Thanks for pointing this out!

  • @jackmorley7444
    @jackmorley7444 Год назад +14

    I happen to do this naturally, I didn't realise it was a thing for charisma lol. I always thought it was better to come out with a well constructed sentence than a muddled one

  • @chaossage8852
    @chaossage8852 2 года назад +135

    Okay, that one was a really good advice, especially for someone with social anxiety

    • @gteixeira
      @gteixeira 2 года назад +4

      It is not, don't follow that. People will pick on you.

    • @souravupadhyay2029
      @souravupadhyay2029 Год назад

      Just go out of your house with friends for morning walk somewhere you will learn to socialize slowly im progressing too.

    • @Bananabear20
      @Bananabear20 9 месяцев назад

      No they won’t

    • @Luey-E
      @Luey-E 8 месяцев назад

      ​@@gteixeirayou seem like you got some anxiety to work on lol

    • @gteixeira
      @gteixeira 8 месяцев назад

      @@Luey-E Not at all, I'm not anxious. If you give people a silent stare of 3 seconds they will call you a creep.

  • @nabadayhalder
    @nabadayhalder Год назад +47

    I paused 30 seconds and made Eye contact with you 😂

  • @charleybrown5713
    @charleybrown5713 2 года назад +2

    Being who you are and being authentic is the best way to express yourself.

  • @itsalaynnaguys
    @itsalaynnaguys 2 года назад +92

    My 3sp goes: “…uh…. *answer*”

    • @Dissociatedaf
      @Dissociatedaf Год назад +1

      That’s the only way it’ll go. I don’t think she realizes other people in the world actually exist 🥴

    • @Bananabear20
      @Bananabear20 9 месяцев назад

      You’re just used to never improving

  • @rohitjagtap14
    @rohitjagtap14 Год назад +3

    I am highly impressed by the personality you've created, your utter delivery, mannerism, along with charisma you pour in your confidence. There's too much to learn from you. Just Thank you! keep making more videos regarding Personality Development.

  • @olivertaveras9896
    @olivertaveras9896 Год назад +53

    It's too surface level. The confidence comes from self esteem. Knowing that you're awesome how you are. 3sp just comes out naturally. High range of emotions and expressiveness comes from high self esteem

    • @ThePojengsidur
      @ThePojengsidur Год назад +4

      Confidence comes from knowledge, relevant critique, calmness, achievement, the way others look at you anf vice versa, etc. and when you know your own knowledge, then the pause comes naturally from conteplating. If the question was complex forming an answer might also take some time. I now think that self esteem is crap.

    • @Luey-E
      @Luey-E 8 месяцев назад

      ​@@ThePojengsiduri liked everything except for the way others look at you. People who are prepared but not afraid to be wrong are truly confident. They do care about what people think but only people who are close to them and who they respect

  • @ryuk6517
    @ryuk6517 2 года назад +36

    Me : taking a 3sp
    Someone else jumps to answer the asked question.

  • @Jonathan-mm5zx
    @Jonathan-mm5zx 2 года назад +7

    I usually do this but glad to know it is a formal way of communicating👍🏾

  • @azamthaheem994
    @azamthaheem994 Год назад +3

    You are an exceptional lady having enormous faculties of heart and soul.

  • @pankajdabholkar4939
    @pankajdabholkar4939 2 года назад +2

    Maam you have an amazing positive vibe. Bless you.

  • @aabdille
    @aabdille 2 года назад +4

    How amazing those little tips Zarai 😍

  • @jlib7389
    @jlib7389 2 года назад +13

    I can't keep eye contact for three seconds.

    • @stephirothermy9938
      @stephirothermy9938 2 года назад +1

      I feel like if you did it could read creepy. Maybe allow your eyes to relax & look slightly to the side or behind the person you’re speaking with instead of staring into their soul through their eyes 👀 lol

    • @syedahmedyoutube
      @syedahmedyoutube Год назад +1

      Try for a minute

  • @HiteshP22
    @HiteshP22 Год назад +1

    She is so charismatic😍

  • @salmaabbasi6978
    @salmaabbasi6978 Год назад +2

    Yes, like Jordon Peterson as an example. I noticed that with him.

  • @careercoachcorporateleader7008
    @careercoachcorporateleader7008 2 года назад +17

    Loved hearing your thoughts! Keep up helping people with nice contents

  • @vishalprasadacoustic
    @vishalprasadacoustic Год назад +2

    Shadè thanks much. You deliver such good quality content.

  • @bigloudandnoisy3601
    @bigloudandnoisy3601 Год назад +1

    I’ve always respected people who I can visibly see their thinking process unfold as you tell them a problem and don’t blurt out in emotion instead. Those are the best managers and leaders In the workplace imo

  • @mujimax007
    @mujimax007 Год назад +1

    I find your tips very useful. Thank you!

  • @gladstoneb879
    @gladstoneb879 5 месяцев назад

    3SP...😊..self confidence is key..😊

  • @mandoball1980s
    @mandoball1980s Год назад +1

    You said all that without pausing or taking a breath. Very impressive

  • @shekhargupta6718
    @shekhargupta6718 Год назад

    You are so high on confidence

  • @bennguyen9847
    @bennguyen9847 Месяц назад

    It’s always refreshing to listen to her…!

  • @nurazlan74
    @nurazlan74 2 года назад

    Nothing beats sincerety. Say what you mean and mean what you and stand your ground. Sincerety requires courage...

  • @jeffersonchen4680
    @jeffersonchen4680 Год назад

    You don't see to apply the 3SP in this clip yet you are still very charismatic.

  • @bethbaldrias1778
    @bethbaldrias1778 10 месяцев назад

    Thank you for your shared tips

  • @belpri633
    @belpri633 2 года назад +1

    What an actual great, practical and easy to apply tip. Thank you!

  • @marcosg20248
    @marcosg20248 Год назад

    Love this ❤ yes I have to work on the 3Sp 😂 I think I sit in the other camp right now 😮

  • @pjeromardesic
    @pjeromardesic 2 года назад +3

    😍😍😍 so simple and so empowering

  • @madanmohan3896
    @madanmohan3896 Год назад

    You are amazing in your content.

  • @becg6832
    @becg6832 2 года назад

    Absolutely! … I’m loving your intelligence charisma generosity and teachings.

  • @Agonyrate
    @Agonyrate 2 года назад +1

    thank you Shadé.

  • @terrencenizam1775
    @terrencenizam1775 Год назад

    Ya so true you are the epitome of that person...❤❤❤ Pause

  • @ailispique1245
    @ailispique1245 3 месяца назад +3

    I do this naturally but im just dissassociating lol

  • @asmatkhan5906
    @asmatkhan5906 10 месяцев назад

    Such a brilliant information, thanks Shade

  • @Chris-pj7jg
    @Chris-pj7jg Год назад

    Thank you very much for the advice given. I will surely adopt this.
    Kind regards.

  • @elianamoreira4075
    @elianamoreira4075 Год назад

    Gosto muito sim das suas aulas prof

  • @itsmebuddy4580
    @itsmebuddy4580 10 месяцев назад

    Aweeee...Nice tip. The way you articulate the tips makes a big impact. Thank you.

  • @healthtips7687
    @healthtips7687 Год назад +2

    I love the part that you often repeats your clothes ❤️❤️..........and away from the sick mentality of not repeating clothes ..... that's great indeed

  • @princeps722
    @princeps722 Год назад

    You look fabulous 🤩

  • @desh_d
    @desh_d Год назад

    You are amazing !

  • @jsarkar1091
    @jsarkar1091 2 года назад +1

    Thanks, Sis.❤️💞🙏🥰

  • @chotabine1551
    @chotabine1551 Год назад +2

    So lovely voice I never hardly my hold live

    • @phoenixkb134
      @phoenixkb134 Год назад

      So lovely voice I never hardly my hold live? WTF?

  • @sachinsharma2609
    @sachinsharma2609 2 года назад +1

    Good advice, thanks

  • @Mushroom321-
    @Mushroom321- Год назад

    great content !!, & discovered the pause works.. 😊😊

  • @ekamonthewise2395
    @ekamonthewise2395 Год назад +1

    I thought I needed to roll for a charisma saving throw

  • @k.k3260
    @k.k3260 2 года назад +2

    Aha that's nice ... Thanks for sharing

  • @nicoldavis-johnson7080
    @nicoldavis-johnson7080 10 месяцев назад

    Like your advice. Thank you for sharing.

  • @kelvynjayy
    @kelvynjayy 2 года назад

    Spot on!

  • @faisaladris1225
    @faisaladris1225 Год назад

    Amazing way to explain keep up the work

  • @lovegoddess29
    @lovegoddess29 Год назад +7

    Love this! I see EXACTLY what she’s talking about👌🏼

  • @KINGTANISH07
    @KINGTANISH07 7 месяцев назад

    Your content is awesome 💯

  • @azafu8942
    @azafu8942 Год назад

    Thank you queen

  • @yvettedejesus3109
    @yvettedejesus3109 Год назад

    My dad taught me this and it's really helped me out.

  • @reshanyousef8178
    @reshanyousef8178 Год назад

    You are really a wonderful speaker, thank you very much for those words🙏🏻🌷

  • @TimothysDream
    @TimothysDream Год назад +1

    Shadé! I randomly came across this in my Shorts feed. So fantastic to see you spreading helpful tips. I hope you're doing well. Hope to dance with you again soon.
    - Tim

    • @ShadeZahrai
      @ShadeZahrai  Год назад +1

      Tim! What a lovely surprise. Hope you're doing great too! Yes, thanks to social media we've had an amazing journey that's taken our business global in a big way. Faysal and I moved base to Koh Samui Island so look us up if you're ever in the area.

  • @cdt_pranaykzala1024
    @cdt_pranaykzala1024 11 месяцев назад

    I recollects my face expression with your video 😊

  • @adnanezerraf9821
    @adnanezerraf9821 Год назад

    Mindblowing accuracy in pronunciation.

  • @germanshepherd8187
    @germanshepherd8187 Год назад

    Great stuff as always Shade

  • @casabellakollam3663
    @casabellakollam3663 7 месяцев назад

    You are full of charisma ❣️

  • @giotapapageorgiou489
    @giotapapageorgiou489 Год назад

    Thank you so much ❤️

  • @akadirnilavane2861
    @akadirnilavane2861 Год назад

    Super information!

  • @ritikarishi3916
    @ritikarishi3916 Год назад

    Thanks for sharing.

  • @rorisangmodisane6894
    @rorisangmodisane6894 Год назад

    I like this woman 🧠

  • @ashimrai4260
    @ashimrai4260 Год назад

    Thank you so much 🙏

  • @kristinajackson5862
    @kristinajackson5862 2 года назад +122

    That only works on stage, in real life it looks very staged and I have asked people after if this is what they were practicing, every time the answer was yes.

    • @rihannaremy2513
      @rihannaremy2513 2 года назад +4

      She should use it for herself 🤭😁😁😁

    • @kristinajackson5862
      @kristinajackson5862 2 года назад +1

      @@rihannaremy2513 naughty naughty 🤭🤭

    • @rekreator9481
      @rekreator9481 2 года назад +7

      Today on things that never happened

    • @nivi8319
      @nivi8319 Год назад +2

      @@whatshername8547 omg😂😂😂😂that 123mississipi made me laugh😂😂😂

  • @KenHoyer
    @KenHoyer 2 года назад

    Great advice

  • @manojdarak2815
    @manojdarak2815 6 месяцев назад

    You are wonderful lady....everyday I listen to your video 5-10 minutes. Thanks for spreading your knowledge God bless

  • @1007amir
    @1007amir Год назад

    This might actually be really helpful! Thanks for sharing!

  • @elianamoreira4075
    @elianamoreira4075 Год назад

    Eu amo essa aula prof

  • @chanelschannel4705
    @chanelschannel4705 Год назад

    You nailed it

  • @gregmoverley7525
    @gregmoverley7525 Год назад

    Love the Content. Thank Yiu for Sharing !

  • @elianamoreira4075
    @elianamoreira4075 Год назад

    Eu amo suas aulas prof

  • @VIJAY-io1hz
    @VIJAY-io1hz 5 месяцев назад +1

    Grey colour wow 😮

  • @Miami11155
    @Miami11155 Год назад

    I love it✨

  • @ZhiznTV
    @ZhiznTV Год назад

    Help full for second language learning. I'm Indian and my first language is hindi and when I start speaking specially English front of my friends they don't understand my points so I'd give them couple of seconds to understand that for better reply. And that's really work for me after all language is only a way to correspond with anyone so they real accept it.

  • @arupsan
    @arupsan Год назад +2

    If you interview me I will be entirely silent😂
    No pause which is called “NOSP”

  • @wendypoet6487
    @wendypoet6487 2 года назад

    Sometimes the pause is for constructing a lie or some deceiving answer. A truthful person just speaks from the heart especially when among friends.

  • @alvincamacho3477
    @alvincamacho3477 Год назад

    True Charisma! 🙏

  • @SandeepKSinha
    @SandeepKSinha Год назад

    In your videos you speak quite fast without the 3SP yet the charisma is so strong 😊

  • @mad9777
    @mad9777 Год назад

    You give out a fresh kinda energy

  • @tamiressoares9303
    @tamiressoares9303 Год назад

    Girl I just landed here from RUclips shorts, and I really have to say I love your outfit 🤍🤍🤍

  • @user-pn6qh7nk5q
    @user-pn6qh7nk5q 2 года назад +1

    Your hair tho🌌😍

  • @resyjr.2645
    @resyjr.2645 Год назад

    U hav a great charisma...

  • @willsalberg
    @willsalberg 6 месяцев назад

    There is so much knowledge in such a short video

  • @Kalayag111
    @Kalayag111 2 года назад

    Super helpful! Thanks!🤎

  • @footwyse
    @footwyse 2 года назад

    Agreed! 💯

  • @nawal10
    @nawal10 2 года назад +2

    Once I paused for too long and it got worse because my anxiety kicked in and everyone just started staring like I'm a weirdo lol. Ugh it was horrible

  • @alimroz1421
    @alimroz1421 Год назад

    Nice conversation

  • @rauthers1286
    @rauthers1286 Год назад

    ❤❤❤ thank you