I Don't Know What a Healthy Relationship With Food Is! 🤷🏻♀️
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- Опубликовано: 31 май 2024
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD IS!
#foodfreedom #intuitiveeating #bingeeating
Disclaimer: This video is for information purposes only and my content should not be used as a substitute for seeking treatment from a healthcare provider. My content is not going to be suitable for everyone, so please use your self discernment before applying any video content in your own life
Welcome to The Binge Eating Therapist channel! I'm Sarah, a former binge eater turned psychotherapist, and today, I want to share with you a framework for creating a HEALTHY relationship with food. Too often, we focus on what we don't want in our relationship with food, but today, I'll give you a positive and holistic perspective on how to approach this complex issue.
Hunger and Fullness
In a HEALTHY relationship with food, you recognize your body's hunger and fullness cues. It's not about perfect responses every time, but rather developing an intuitive understanding of when you're hungry and when you're full, without judgment or mental noise clouding your judgment.
Enjoyment
People with a HEALTHY relationship with food genuinely enjoy what they eat. While some may see food purely as fuel, many of us find joy in savoring different flavors. Don't rush to detach from this enjoyment if you've had a complex history with food; it's a gradual process.
Assortment of Food
Variety is the spice of life, and it's crucial in a HEALTHY relationship with food. Avoid pigeonholing foods as "safe" or "scary." Embrace a wide assortment of foods in your diet, aiming for balance and nourishment.
Liking Yourself
Your self-esteem should not be dictated by what, when, or how you eat. Those with a HEALTHY relationship don't tie their self-worth to their eating habits. Break free from the cycle where food influences how you perceive yourself.
Three Meals a Day or Rhythm
Establishing a rhythm and routine around food creates a sense of safety and predictability. It helps your body regulate and anticipate its needs. While flexibility is crucial, having a basic structure can be reassuring.
Handling Fluctuations
Understand that your appetite and eating patterns fluctuate naturally. Those with a HEALTHY relationship can adapt without anxiety or judgment. Accept these changes as part of the human experience.
Yesterday's Eating Doesn't Dictate Today
Avoid the trap of using past eating behaviors to determine what you should eat today. Every day is a new opportunity to make choices aligned with your intuition and body's signals. Don't let yesterday's choices haunt today.
Finding a HEALTHY relationship with food is a journey, not an instant transformation. Focus on changing how you think and feel about food, and you'll find that different behavioral choices become possible. Let go of the need for perfection, and embrace the ebb and flow of your relationship with food.
Join my Life After Diets community. This community is for you if you want to improve your relationship with food and become more comfortable in your own skin. Community membership includes invites to live episode recordings (online), support meetings, a private Facebook group and monthly Q&As. For more information go to: / lifeafterdiets
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If you found this video useful you may want to check out the podcast Life After Diets, which I co-host with Stefanie Michele. Available across most podcast platforms. Join our growing support community. This community is for you if you want to improve your relationship with food and become more comfortable in your own skin. Community membership includes invites to live episode recordings (online), support meetings, a private Facebook group and monthly Q&As. For more information go to: / lifeafterdiets
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This all makes sense, thank you! I’ve struggled with very disordered eating for about 55 years! I’d love if you were my therapist!! ❤
Thank you for everything you do. I have read all the books, watched all the videos but nothing has resonated with me like you do! I’m 40 and this is the first year I’ve made progress with restricting (which I didn’t even realize I was still doing) and bingeing (which I thought was my main/only problem). You’ve made a huge difference in my life, thank you!
You are so welcome ❤❤❤❤
You are such a beautiful person inside out! Very generous and smart and so wise!!! I am new to your channel and try to absorb everything as your understanding and wisdom are so profound. Thank you for providing all this help!❤
YES-YES to all you've said!!!!!!
You are helping me so much. I FEAR eating above a certain amount of calories and it’s hindering my recovery… I feel like I continuously need validation that the number is too low, but don’t want to talk to anyone about it for fear of being judged. I am using you as my rational brain haha
I see that I definitely have a complicated relationship with food defined around liking myself more if I am being healthy and beating myself up if I binge / overeat … how do we address this ? Have you done a video on this? Thanks so much Sarah, your videos are so good
Btw I love you girl I always pray for you you literally saved my life I haven't fully recovered yet but at least I'm not hopeless and depressed and ashamed anymore even tho I'm relapsing alot I'm grateful that alot of things changed within me and my binges became much less
Awww, thank you 🙏
Many thanks for your videos❤
I haven’t binge ate for a month and smh. And yesterday I lost control while I was outside with my friend. I ate a chocolate, ice cream and fries. My recovery brain part says ,, it’s okay there will be days when we eat more and when we eat less , it’s a human thing” . But I lost control I ate those stuff so fast and I felt sooo guilty. And deep inside ik binge urges don’t come for no reason and my life’s been complicated lately. But I do have to say I feel very guilty I binge ate this morning too . And idk what to do I don’t have anyone to talk to and share I feel like I need a hug and to cry . Sometimes during my recovery I take bad food choices cause I feel like my crush won’t like me if I gain weight. And he’s been showing intrest in me . I feel like this makes me a bad joke too . Idk how to get better now . 1 month and smh is so much for me . Cause there was a period when I used to binge every day twice. And I’m gonna have to be for real there’s no guarantee that it won’t happen again at one point but it’s scary . And I don’t give myself sm freedom around food lately. Feeling guilty abt every small meal I have
We have so many clients who are unsure of what a healthy relationship with food looks like, love this breakdown you give!
We totally agree, the more we focus on what it DOES look like (rather than what it DOESN'T look like), the easier it is to visualize that relationship
This was really insightful. Thank you ❤ 🍽️
Sarah this is unrelated to the video but just saw it pop up and wanted to thank you - for making your book accessible for free in audiobook form (I also bought a hard copy after!). your book was the first serious step I took in recovering from my ED- I infact had atypical bulimia rather than BED *but* it remains the same, your words, work and strategies were the first step I took in actually trying to take action against something that had control over my life for over 10 years. I’m immensely grateful to you, it was truly a life changing thing for me coming across you and your work and started me down the path of curiosity and compassion with/for my ED rather than self judgement and shame. Thank you.
I’m so glad to hear this 😍😍😍
Thank for all these tips!
I think my problem is my eating patterns which is all over the place.
I tried to do IF and it doesn’t work. I ended up binging more.
I will try 3 meals a day including breakfast.
I’m going to screenshot yr summaries and keep it as my reminder.
God bless u for all yr work to help people like me to overcome eating disorder 🙏
Thank you Sarah. I've become fairly comfortable with most of these. I ebb and flow with Liking myself and Handling fluctuations. It does get a bit scary when I'm extra hungry one day. I tell myself that it's a real thing that happens to everyone and is not a judgement on me. I love acronyms too and this one is going in my notebook!
Good morning from Belfast Sarah 😀 EXCELLENT VIDEO, EXCELLENT ADVICE, thank you, so very much 💐 and again, EXCELLENT ADVICE 😀
Finally someone who gets it
This is a great resource, thank you!!
Hey I wanted to say thank you so much i keep replaying your videos everyday it helps me so much ❤️
Thank you ☀️💕✨❣️
Thank you, Sarah! Your videos have helped me so much on my path of curing BED. Though,I'm still struggling. Here's one question. I will be very grateful if you or someone answer.
I usually wake up early in the morning. I just can't sleep longer. Not because I don't want to sleep but because I wake up and start dreaming about food. And this tendency is approximately for 1,5 years already. I then leap from my bed with an alarm, swiftly brush my teeth and eat. It is usually something nourishing like meat with porridge, dessert. I don't usually eat raw vegetables I don't digest them well. But I often can't stop. And binge happens. On the other days,I try to eat healthy: three meals,two consisting meat/fish/eggs+ porridge/cooked vegetables+dessert+bread,one consisting something like tofu,bread, granola,cottage cheese,fruits, there are also some snacks. So I'm certainly not hungry.
But why do I have just insatiable appetite? My weight is also low. I do sports but it's not extreme: 1-1,5 hours a day medium cardio or weightlifting or swimming. Moreover,my gallbladder is a bit spoilt. I keep having bile in my stomach if exercising in the morning or a night after a binge. I feel guilty that I worsen my health some days and don't do anything useful. I want to gain weight but I can't 😭 It's horrific, everyone is shocked I can eat this much and don't gain almost anything. But damn,I really can't eat more than I eat when the day is without binge, it's not safe,and I don't feel good after it.
So, don't you know why this insatiable appetite may come?
thank you for this
But if I don’t let yesterday dictate how I eat today or try to control it, then I’m just gonna keep eating more and more and more everyday cuz I have no self control and keep eating far beyond feeling full. Even though I’m past food restoration after restriction, I’d say ur right about it being a response to my brain not trusting me that i’ll get more food, so it goes into over eating, which eventually causes restriction again.
How do you maintain your health around temptation? I work around chocolate and find myself binging around it.
Thank you , I feel like I have to hate food am not sure why ?? I also feel guilty about eating and I am bulimic why is this so hard ??
I’m not flexible when it comes to highly palatable highly processed foods that aren’t actually satisfying. There’s a lot of foods I’ll binge on that aren’t healthy foods and they make me physically feel unhealthy and they trigger my chronic illnesses. With my food choices I’m choosing what doesn’t trigger binging and causes flare ups with my chronic illness so I like to limit grains sweets and manufactured processed foods b cause they flare up my chronic illness. If I really want sweet I can have a bit of fruit. Otherwise I seem to do best with meat and potatoes like just roasted potatoes and limited veggies. One of my chronic illnesses is IBS and I find I have issues when I eat too much fiber, but I feel great when I eat mostly animal based, lots of eggs, a moderate amount of dairy and a small side of roasted potatoes every couple of days and not because my afraid of fat in my meals either. It’s greatly improved my mental health my digestion, energy levels, and that insatiable appetite I seem to have for the ultra processed foods that go down way too easy. I’m doing it this way because I e been chronically ill for 15 years and I’ve come to recognize what makes my health problems worse and what makes them not worse. I’m also very allergic to pesticides, herbicides and mold and my heart races when I’m exposed to these things like the flour that’s in the ultra processed foods
I would say that everybody needs to find a way that work for them, for you it seems you are doing better when you eat more of the things that keep your blood sugar stable and are more filling. This is also my experience, I do eat some sweets and higly-palatable things but way way less than I used to and definitely not to the exclusion of other nutritious foods
@@melitapavlinic7302 celebration foods are for celebrations not for every day. I want to limit them to a handful of them Mrs a year and doing it that way keeps me from binging. Boxed foods just make my heart race after eating them and that doesn’t feel good regardless of it’s taste and recognizing it’s a trigger I’m powerless to where there’s no such thing as moderation and that food manufacturers have designed them to be that way helps me not feel bad about avoiding them as the whole point is nourishing my body with food that both taste good and make me feel good and reduce inflammation which is a constant battle. What I’ve learned is fat is not my enemy and potatoes aren’t my enemy, but instant mashed potatoes are something that will make my heart race. If I want something crunchy I can bake cheese into chips and do the same with bacon so I’m not craving chips and crackers because of a salty crunch. Avoiding sweets overall also makes fruits and even almonds taste sweeter and that’s satisfying, but I still limit both. Beans are highly inflammatory so I’m going to avoid them and I already know the issues I have with wheat and corn. A lot of things are just easier to avoid completely than keeping in the house. The interesting thing is all my trigger foods when I was a kid where not everyday foods and problems only showed themselves once these foods became everyday foods. I think it’s wise for everyone to keep a pocket sized composition notebook cause they are sturdy nearby and to pay attention to how you feel after eaters by foods as an exercise and listening to your body. Just to notice how you react to what you consume. It makes a difference. Also due to oxalate dumping currently full on carnivore isn’t ideal also my body feels satisfied in an unexplainable way the few times a week I eat roasted potatoes that doesn’t happen with other foods that also keeps all bread cravings at bay. Also every time I eat onions and garlic in spite of these things making food taste good I have bad reactions within 12 hours like increased incontinence issues
I’m all for people finding what works for them. There really is no one size fits all ❤️❤️
@@TheBingeEatingTherapist Absolutely, it’s all about being open enough to figure out what does work for us.
I did all of your principles but seeing junk food entering my family's house still triggers my urges so is the problem in being exposed to food and the only way to break free is living alone and managing the food entering my house or it just means that theres a loophole in my recovery system?
I've recorded a podcast about having foods in the house vs not having them in the house and we look at it through several different lenses. I think you may find this episode useful for helping you decide how you want/need to approach this tricky area. I think it'll be released in a fortnight xx
@@TheBingeEatingTherapist Waiting for ya
Great summation!! Thanks for all you do 😊
Sarah, can you please provide an Arabic translation, because I do not understand much in English?
I have no idea how to do this. If you know, let me know, although if it means manually translating into Arabic I don't have the resources to do this I'm afraid