I'm so glad to hear a momma these days who admits she's being flexible with her newborn instead of following rigid rules and schedules!!! I know I'm older and old fashioned but I wish new mommas would relax a bit and not make life so hard for themselves and the babies!!!
I'm glad my baby easily naturally fell into a cycle (or schedule) by a few months old, as it helped us both. I was determined to teach her to sleep through the night as soon as possible. Brain needs that. Eating just followed. But the schedule was not rigid by any means, we tweaked it till about 6 months and again dropped a nap at 7 (on her terms). Sure we get fuss at bedtime, but that depends on the mood rather than whether it's 7,8 or 9.
It's so difficult to put a newborn on a schedule- just have to go with the flow for the first couple of months. I found most babies will naturally put them selves in to a schedule eventually.
Exactly and each baby is so different! I’ve learned that letting them cry a little to finish that last dish or letting them sleep through 1 feeding etc. it’s ok! See how your baby is and go from there! And all these new gadgets people buy lol what if your baby doesn’t like it! Just relax and let things fall into place naturally
We are asked to be productive very early after the baby arrive. We HAVE to try and set up some regular routine so we can work and not die of exhaustion
I love how you are so middle ground about babies. Co-sleeping and sleep training, breastfeeding and formula. I feel like most blogs are extremists. It encourages me that you can drop a bit of both
I also gave my baby formula and I was so glad because it reduced my stress. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing and that realization has actually resulted in my baby getting MORE breast milk!
Thank you so much for being so brave and honest about co sleeping (safely) and introducing formula early if you don't have enough milk right away... there's so much shaming of new moms for these things so it's so nice to see this.
I hope these tips help! I wish I would have known all of this the first time around, but I guess we all have to experience it. Side note: the lighting on my left side is WAY brighter, so if my makeup looks darker on the right side, it’s because of that. 🤪
I’m a hospital newborn RN and constantly see the frustration when baby instantly prefers the bottle and has a very difficult time breastfeeding after that. I’d say definitely don’t give a bottle the first week. Use a syringe or medicine dropper to supplement at the breast or just a medicine cup. At least use a Dr. Brown’s bottle with premie nipple and baby side lying to control the flow of milk, because many babies do instantly frequently prefer the fast and easy flow of a bottle. Lack of information makes my job way more difficult than it has to be and also results in mothers in tears because baby stops taking the breast.
Susan Yara I’m a first time mom to my 3 week old daughter Eila Nicole (our daughters have the same name😆) and I noticed that we’re doing a lot of the same things like co-sleeping, transitioning from breast to bottle, to leaving the baby with someone for just a couple hours. It’s nice to know that someone else is kinda doing the same thing cause it makes you feel like your not doing anything wrong. I’ve gotten a few disapproving looks for leaving her with my husbands mother but honestly there is no shame in getting a few moments to yourself. I learned a lot from you, thank you!! 😁💕
I find it really depends on the person. I had my child when i was 23 and I studied nursing RN in uni. I was pretty well equipped with knowledge and experience since i was placed at labour and delivery. I was a pretty chill mom. I didn't really have schedules or anything like that. I let my baby hold rule and just followed his lead. It led him to be much happier and me being much happier as well. Everyone is different. Everyone parents different. I had so many of my aunties telling me im spoiling him but how do you spoil a newborn who only wants milk and cuddles?? Just do you hun!
It's so true! I'm a nurse and was also a nanny for years in addition to the experience I had with my siblings. So I felt very prepared when my son was born. It was an easy easy transition. The hardest part was our extended family's pressure, judgement, and need for time time time. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted and none of it was the baby 🤷♀️
I been strictly breastfeeding my 4 month old baby. There are times I feel so drained, and I even feel ashamed for even thinking of introducing formula to her. The internet does not help either, you just want the best for her, but mom shaming its so so real!
Honestly im 5 months with my first and i dont think ill be breastfeeding for a long time... Idk i was a formula baby and i came out fine... I don't feel women should feel guilty for saving energy yourself to be a more effective you
Wow, this is the most refreshing motherhood video I have ever seen in my entire freaking life. I’m still in the first year of having baby home as we spent two months in the nicu and I’m finally starting to relax. Thanks for this breath of fresh air.
Thankfully both of twins slept in their bassinets the whole night because I was adamant about not bed-sharing. Then when the turned 8 months, I was hospitalized for over a week, and my mom got them dependent on being rocked and held in their sleep. It has been a nightmare to break the habit but they're finally getting better now at 12 months.
Hearing these comments have been so relieving for me as I've struggled with what I "think" should be the "right" way of doing things and it's just led to a lot of stress and frustration. From strictly wanting to breastfeed because of "nipple confusion" and not knowing what's really in formula to trying not to freak out because he's crying..and on occasion wanting to strangle my hubby for the first time EVER in our 10 yr relationship...It's so nice to hear that what's going on and what I am doing shouldn't make me feel bad. Thank you Susan for being so real about these topics! It's very encouraging!
dalam indira there are some downsides. So it’s always good to give mum all the information so she can make an informed choice that works for her and baby
This is so true but its hard when you get mom shamed about it by literally everyone, including your doctor bc you can produce milk but its just not enough... :(
So true, it’s all about fed is best, regardless of whether the baby is breastfed or formula fed. My LO was born at a very low birthweight at 37 weeks and she couldn’t latch properly. She was bottle fed for the first month with fortified breast milk (my milk mixed with powdered formula) to help her gain weight. After she was a month old, we tried breastfeeding again and she picked it up no problem with help from our lactation clinic. She still had a bottle everyday from her daddy but we never had issues with nipple confusion with her. Every baby is different, every situation is different.
sammikit you’re so lucky! My baby preferred bottle over my breasts but I still give her my milk I just pump every couple of hours. I think that’s the main reason my supply dropped significantly
Leah McKenna I always dream to breastfeed I desperately tried, I encourage moms, breastfeeding is best , I was body shamed for not producing enough milk, but our doctor was supportive, she understood that we tried everything but when baby's weight was drastically falling, we opted for mixed feeding
Also, something I learned recently is that milk doesn’t “come in”. It’s all milk. Colostrum, transition milk, and normal milk is all milk so there is no need to stress. It all gives your baby nutrition and it’s all good! This idea that milk needs to “come in” is just not true. Thank goodness!
Danielle Calder totally agree it’s all good milk but I think they refer to “coming in” as when your milk shifts from colostrum to milk and you can get the huge hormonal surge. I ended up with fevers and shakes around day 4-5 with each of my babies because of the milk kicking in, I guess because it can sometime affect Mum so much they’ve named it 😊
yeah it does actually. My milk never really came in at all and my son was hungry and losing weight, had to switch to formula. not having enough milk is part of milk not coming in
YESSSSS!! I Absolutely loved this video♡ Its wonderful to see a mom admit to co-sleep with their baby. I thought i was the only one and it made me feel so guilty. I didnt know what i was doing wrong, i saw all these moms who say their babies sleep in their bassinet through the night. Co-sleeping gave me sanity and I wish more moms admitted to do it too. Thank you for this amazing raw and realistic video 💕💕
I was crying last night watching videos of moms who had a baby with a toddler in the mix. Watching this makes me feel like there’s hope I won’t be a total mess. Thank you 🙏🏻
It’s also good to try soothing them with your voice before picking them up that way they can learn to be comforted by your presence even when you aren’t physically sitting with them :)
I watched this video when my baby was two months old and now I'm watching it again, when my baby girl is a year old. So many things you say about the first time around resonate with me and the second time around I hope I'll loosen up a bit. Thank you for sharing, it takes some big ass balls to share your thoughts and opinions for the world to see (and judge). You go momma! xx
Loving that you’re cosleeping! I have coslept all 3, and like you was so much harder on myself following the “rules” of schedules with my first. Then I realised they aren’t robots. Sometimes I get tired early, sometimes I can’t fall asleep, sometimes I wake up feeling crappy, sometimes happy, sometimes I’m hungry for lunch at 11am, sometimes not hungry at all during the day. Why would babies not be the same, they’re human too x
I just wanted to thank you, my family judged me because they kept saying I wouldn't know how to care for my first child and all of your videos helped me so much. I adore all your videos 💙
Our Ozair is 10 weeks -- just a bit older than Ayla, but he's my first. My biggest issue is that I want to constantly strangle my husband! This video definitely encouraged me to chill out more. His work hours are insane, and I didn't enjoy being at home with the baby almost 24 hours by myself. Thank God for mommy groups. I'm back at work now and it's been so much better since I get more balance in my day. Can't imagine how you're doing it with two! And you look beautiful! Go mama!
Anum Qassam it takes a while mama. Lots of hard times, sleep deprivation, a brand new world. Honestly, the first year is the toughest in terms of lots of things (adjusting to a brand new life) which includes your relationship. I promise it gets better. You’re doing amazing! xx
This is currently me I am almost 3 weeks postpartum and feel the same am home with 3 kiddos ages 3..2 and my newborn and all doing it by myself my husband leaves to work at 5 am and returns at 8 -9 pm so u can imagine how I feel plus I have 2 older children in school ages 11 and 8 and no help and at times I just feel like craying 😭
Susan!!! Yesss!!! I have been following along during your pregnancy and feel like there were SO many of your videos where I was feeling exactly the same way (almost verbatim!). So happy for you and your family - it’s so much better being a bit kinder to ourselves and ‘allowing’ ourselves to go with the flow. Thanks for another great video
Thank you so much for this video! I’m a first time mom, and my baby is three weeks old. What you shared has made me feel so much better about a lot of the decisions my husband and I have made for our newborn. I was super stressed for the first two weeks, but I’m finally getting to a place where I am trusting my instinct.
LOVE THIS! I do all of these as a first time mum and secretly felt a bit ashamed of things like cosleeping and formula feeding, but it just felt right for me! So so happy this is being shared.
I stressed (and still do) about my baby and his sleep. I tried sleep training for months. I would watch your videos and others and read books about it and cry wondering why my baby just wouldn't sleep through the night. I'm glad you're more open about co-sleeping with you're baby. I honestly believe too that people aren't truly honest about it. Thanks for sharing that.
I am 26 weeks pregnant with my first and I have been a nut case wanting things to be perfect. I needed this video to give me some perspective. With your first it's like traveling to space for the first time so you over compensate not knowing what you will need or how to handle different scenarios. This was reassuring to a new mom and reminded me babies don't need a lot. I will focus on just getting to know my baby. Make that my new montra
I've said it before but it bears repeating, baby Ayla is so adorable! Now that I've got that out of my system. Susan I'm glad that you're taking a much more relaxed approach to parenting this time around. I think this way you'll get more joy out of things instead of being stressed out. You have carried a baby around for 9 months and went through a c section. No need in adding additional unnecessary stress. Your body's still recovering and you are adjusting to a two child and a cute dog household. And it's sweet that your husband makes you breakfast. I hope you find a house that you like. One of my hobbies is looking at houses on Trulia. It's interesting to see the different price points in different areas.
im currently expecting my first child and im loving all this helpful advice! Thank you so much, I would love to see a video on things you wish you knew during your first pregnancy and post birth.
I love that you mentioned giving formula in the hospital until your milk came in. I have a lactation consultant yell at me for it. I have successfully breastfed two children. A little formula wont kill them! or sabotage milk production! Great tip
For new moms. I did the breastfeeding+ bottle but one thing that my pediatrician suggested (that I personally liked very much and found beneficial) is to introduce a bottle as a “reward” after you breastfeed. She explained that it’s easier for the baby to get the milk from the bottle and many babies don’t want to “work hard” after they know the milk is easily available. I followed that instruction and my baby was a combination of breastfeeding and a bottle till he was 9 month old. (Then he started to bite REALY BADLY😅 but that’s a different story). Bottom line, I do agree that having both options available is much less stressful.
I just had my first baby(9 months ago), & your experience was so similar to mine. I don’t know if I want a second one, but I feel comforted knowing it gets better.
Thank you for being real! I’m 16 months postpartum and first baby! Only one and I did the same thing your doing now, and yes other people make you feel bad for it! And tell you what they did and how much better it is! And what you shouldn’t do! So much pressure to do it how others tell you !and not listen to our instincts! And what works for you! Then you feel you have to hid it! And feel your doings everything wrong! People should respect our choices and support it! Not make you feel bad you’re not listening to their advice!
LOVE THIS VIDEO! This is almost identical to my second time around. I have an 11 day old newborn baby and a 2 year 3 month old. I too am a fan of being flexible in the early days and being more relaxed and just going with the flow. I think this does come with being an experienced parent, you're just less afraid in general and more confident in what you know and are doing and so trust yourself more to do what works for you and your baby instead of what others say you should be doing. I also co-sleep and it has been amazing, I get so much more sleep this way than I did with my first when i was trying to get him to sleep on his own in his crib. The back and forth throughout the night is killer and really all baby wants in those early days is to be close to you which is completely normal and understandable! Thank you for sharing your experience, I'm so happy to know, there are other moms out there who have the same approach to the newborn stage!
Love this more casual approach to scheduling the first several weeks. It's the first time I've really heard someone talk about this, and it's really calmed a lot of my anxiety. Thank you!
Heck yeah! Love this video. Super honest, no shame and a proud mommy. Fed is best. Everyone else needs to get over themselves. You’re the mom and a good one. You saw she needed more food and helped her which is our job. No mom shaming! When I was a first time mom they told me the bottle was traumatizing my baby.. She is completely fine and so happy. People say weird things. Go you and go this video.
Totally agree with introducing bottle early. Did not do with first baby and so regretted it. I didn't know much first time around and will recommend all new moms to introduce bottle as early as possible.
I’m a hospital newborn RN and constantly see the frustration when baby instantly prefers the bottle and has a very difficult time breastfeeding after that. I’d say definitely don’t give a bottle the first week. Use a syringe or medicine dropper to supplement at the breast or just a medicine cup. At least use a Dr. Brown’s bottle with premie nipple and baby side lying to control the flow of milk, because many babies do instantly frequently prefer the fast and easy flow of a bottle. Lack of information makes my job way more difficult than it has to be and also results in mothers in tears because baby stops taking the breast.
I introduced bottle and formula on day 6, because my nipples were so sore and my midwife told me to do it. It took so much pressure from me and really helped me to enjoy nursing afterwards. Now he is 11 weeks old and only gets formula maybe once a week.
I was told 2-4 weeks is the best time to introduce the bottle intermittently to get baby used to it. That way they have at least 2 weeks to get your milk supply established and learn to latch. But it’s very important to introduce pretty early on as a lot of babies will not take a bottle or be very picky with bottles after about 3 months
Great tips! Thanks for the advice Susan and I'm so glad you're are feeling more chill and relaxed this time around! All the best to you and your beautiful family!
I agree, I tend to put babies on a schedule but they never follow it, they’re always changing every day so I’ve just learn to go with the flow. Susan, you look great after baby #2 she looks a lot like your hubby, very strong Indian features and lots of hair! She’s going to be gorgeous growing up.
Being a first time mom and being afraid and not knowing what I’m doing made the thought of having a second child really scary but this video gives me hope in having a second child! It’s nice to know you can learn and be chill the next time around.
I’ve actually been battling with myself wether or not to have a second kid. Because all of what you said about the first is so true. It was so hard during the first few months, I am so type A, I was stressed out about everything. And definitely I was so annoyed with my hubby even if he was doing so much to help now that I think about it. But again, you make it seem so easy this time around. Makes me wonder if we can really handle a second one or if you’re just super and natural at this mother thing! Congratulations again!
I was exactly the same, my milk was coming in really slowly and my newborn was super hungry all the time. So I decided even though I originally wanted to only breastfeed, it was more important that he gets all the nutrition when he needs. I did feel guilty that I didn't have enough milk but now looking back, I'm glad I introduced formula when my milk wasn't enough.
I’m a mom, childcare provider, and grandma. What you’re sharing sounds like you’re now an experienced mom, doing things naturally! Just being open to what a child needs and providing w/o all the made up rules, is the best way! Sounds great 💛
""It helped me to not feel stressed about my milk coming in." YES! Formula allowed me to relax enough to be able to breastfeed. No one told me that could be a possibility but supplementing with formula definitely made our breastfeeding journey possible.
I don't know about the whole nipple confusion thing but thank goodness your introducing a bottle. It will makes it so much easier for the people in your life that spend time with baby with out you. I kept my best friends baby over night one time when he was about 7 months old and he was strictly beast fed. He would not take a bottle for nothing. He literally gagged and cried and cried for hours. I felt so bad for him. I ended up calling his Mommy and told her to come feed her baby!!!!
I'd like to see a video about how you feel when strangers approach you too look, or try to touch your baby and how you handle those situations along with family members who are sick, have been near sick people or children who want to hold Ayla. I have a hard time explaining to people that I don't feel comfortable with them being so close to my infant and they seem to get upset very easily when I say "no, please back away from my child".
I'm a first time mom of a six month old. Your tips are exactly how I feel when I do this the second time around. I got roped into those negative stigmas about the formula and had her cry really hard the first few days until my milk came in. I regret so much listening to the docs. She was also 6.1 and had dropped weight and jaundice so eventually they recommended that we give her some formula but after those agonizing few days. Then we avoided giving her a bottle because people warned us about nipple confusion and now our baby won't drink from the bottle and she's completely attached to me. Also with you on the co sleeping and feelings about the husband. I'm saving this video to remind me when we have a second baby!
Second to introducing formula and bottle early. My baby had jaundice and the most important thing to me was he eat enough and pooped enough in the first week. So I gave him formula the 2nd day and I’m so glad I did that. My baby accepts all kinds of bottles and formula now while being breastfed. It makes both of our lives much easier.
Such a helpful video, thank you! 29 weeks pregnant with my first and this is like having a friend that gives you honest advice 😘 Your little one is a doll 💖
I love your thoughts and feedback on the husband situation! That is SO true for me and lots of my friends, and I feel like it’s something no one talks about.
I love your video, I had baby girl 4 months ago and for the first couple months I had so much anxiety about everything. People around me didnt help much and judged my every move. But now I'm so much more comfortable. I didnt co sleep and I wish I did, but I started co sleeping about a month ago. I love it!!! I didnt have enough supply to feed her so I introduced formula from day 2. Everyone judged me for that. Being a first time mom was stressful enough already. I feel like next time it will be alot easier for me.
Totally agree on schedule for baby. I have two boys. 4 and 2 years old. First boy, schedule on dot!!!. Cry out method. 2nd time, go with flow. He cry, feed him, change and cuddle him. Enjoy ur baby girl. Soo sweet. Kinda miss my older one when he was baby, didnt do much cuddle with my older one. Sadddd...
I recognized myself in the way you did with your first baby. Thank you for sharing this! It is so nice to hear and that is how I’m imagine our second try😀less stressfully and more enjoying!
Being a Mom it's really amazing yes it's hard but reword is monumental, I have 2 kids, my daughter hated cosleeping she wanted her space but my second baby boy loved it and yes feeding was so easy.
Omg i needed this video in my life. FTM here n ugh yes the rules n time the crying the night not sleeping in crib...EVERYTHING. Ppl tell me i HAVE TO follow & part of me wanted to go with the flow & i always got the NO U HAVE TO FOLLOW N STAY ON IT. im glad it will be ok if i just go with my instinct bc ugh i have not eaten nor slept in daysssss.
Omg the co sleeping thing is something funny. My sister had a hard time with her first child and didn’t co sleep at all. It was to the point as my nephews uncle I just started to sleep with him when he was a baby at 3 weeks and I didn’t know about the fears about why you don’t co sleep with a child. I slept in a recliner and held him in between my legs and just kept him there and he would wake up at 5am and that’s when my sister would wake up and be ready for the day. Baby’s sleep in your stomache naturally for 9months so I do find it easy to just co sleep from the beginning. I slept in a recliner for 6months and hurt my back and had to get massages for a long time to correct the pain. The 2nd and 3rd child she was on her and her husband with co sleeping with her babies and they finally knew the pain I had dealt with.
OMG! New baby?!?! I’ve been so busy with my first one I didn’t even know you were preggers with the second! Congratulations!!! You made the first one look so easy I don’t know how you do it.
I did most of the things you did with my first kid... even though every choice i made worked out for me, i was carrying the guilty now and then... after watching your video i am totally out of guilty 😊 thanks for sharing there truth👍
You touched on this but could we possibly have a list type video on what you ended up getting for baby number 2/what things from the first time round made a reappearance? Congratulations on Baby Ayla, she’s so beautiful!!
Cosleeping saved my sanity. My son slept with me from a week old to one year old. He started sleeping through the night naturally at 3 months old and I truly believe it’s because he caught on to our routine and being in bed with me showed him he was safe.
100% agree with your "nipple confusion" comment. Never felt like that was a real thing. My experience and anyone I know who introduced the bottle early on didn't encounter this issue.
Oh my gosh Susan I can totally relate to most of the points you ve made! Ive just had my second baby (around the same age as yours) and I consciously making an effect not to worry about schedules etc and go with the flow! Its really nice to know that someone else has had a similar experience and to know nipple confusion may not actually be a thing! Thanks again for the video!!
I was very go-with-the-flow with my firstborn, my son. He co-slept because I didn’t understand sleep training or scheduling at all. He was very chill during the day and only woke up during the night for a quick feeding and fell back asleep. Naturally he fell into sleeping on his own throughout the night (12 hours straight) at 10 months and one 2-hour nap during the day after having co-slept with me that whole time. I didn’t have to train or anything. With my second, my daughter, I began sleep-training right away just to manage time better with having to still care for my son, as well. She was my super fussy one and I thought I was dealing with a colicky baby until after two months, she suddenly stopped being so fussy. She’s four months now and she has three scheduled naps a day and sleeps 12 hours at night only waking twice to feed very quickly and conk back out again. Personally it’s been easier sleep training the second time around, more out of necessity. But every baby and every parent is different, as well as circumstances. Whatever works for each person! Not every situation is going to apply for everybody so don’t stress- whether you’re a new parent or more experienced one.
I love sooo many things you mentioned in this video. My first baby is now 4 weeks old and I feel like I have learned soooooo much. Like how you mentioned the cosleeping thing. He lasts maybe 30 minutes sleeping in his bassinet which makes for a longggg night! But all I heard was terrible things about cosleeping.. well about after a week of doing that and getting no sleep we now cosleep and get 2-4 hour stretches of sleep!
My first baby, I bought everything brand new and formula feed since I had no breastfeeding education. Second baby is a co-sleeper, breastfed, and wearing hand-me-downs. It's easier this time around!
I remember you mentioned brushing babies head when in the tub to help alleviate cradle cap. That was one thing I started doing soon after our daughter was born, and I absolutely feel that's why she hasn't had cradle cap, so far! Thanks for your videos!
So we just brought home our first baby 11 weeks ago, and like you I was terrified about him sleeping with us and wanted to put him in his crib right way. The hubby felt the complete opposite and honestly I’m really glad that I gave in. Our little guy was definitely a night owl for a minute there but now that he sleeps with us he’s sleeping a lot better at night and is a lot easier to put to bed also.
Susan, you’re my kinda momma! I just had a baby in August and I literally could have made this video verbatim!!! Cosleeping ☑️Formula☑️ bottle☑️ less clutter ☑️. This was my second too and things went so much smoother. Ok
Thank you for calling out the breastfeeding pressures. I had no milk when I had my daughter. I kept trying and trying but nothing came out. I tried everything and the hospital and my husband thought I was quitting on breastfeeding and made me feel like a failure. I wish I had understood milk supply and I wish they had noticed because I blamed myself. My milk came in 2 weeks after I had her.
This is so me with my second son. Everything is much less stressful just chill and I think the baby feeds off that he is so much more calm than my first. And husband has been a great help as well lol 😂
Omg I can’t agree more about the formula and breastfeeding. With my first I struggled to ensure I only breastfed and she was hungry. I pumped after each and every feed including all night. I didn’t introduce a bottle until 6 weeks. It made the initial period much more difficult. This time I told myself I was open to formula. The second night she cluster fed for 7 hours and I was soooo tired from my long labour and I gave formula in the hospital. She slept. I slept. She was happy. It made everything so much more relaxed. And I am now doing both at 3 months still and I can go out and have someone watch her or go to sleep and someone else can watch her and feed her. It’s just so much more free and I’m a better mom. I also am with you on the letting them cry a bit more. Same. I just can’t get to her immediately with a 2 year old.
@susanayara I have done the exact same co sleeping arrangement with all 3 of my kiddos. My husband always co sleeps with our next smallest child while I sleep with the baby (they're all 2 years apart). Works great for everybody's sleep! And it hasn't affected "our alone time." When everybody is asleep you make the effort 😉🤣.
I did everything you said with my first baby and honestly I felt it was a breeze the first few weeks, trying to fall into what people tell you would work best for you doesn’t always work for everyone.
Wow! I agree with everything in this video. I just had my second baby 3 weeks ago. I have been so much more laid back about everything. I've even gotten more sleep this time around because I went straight to cosleeping as well and I'm not worried about my milk because I know more of what to do this time around breastfeeding. 💕
Loved this!! I would really love to see a video on what products you used for baby #2. The minimalism is speaking to me ☺️ I’m 12 weeks and starting a registry, it’s so easy to get carried away! A friend suggested I add a request to fam/friends for maid services, as well - so clever!
Oh my gosh... totally relatable!!! I am pregnant with my second child and when I think about my first child I was so stressed out... I didn’t appreciate my husband at all even though he was doing a lot. This time around I will absolutely do things differently... very nice video. Enjoyed watching it 👍👍👍
I wish I saw a video like this when I had my first baby instead of all the videos that terrified me about breastfeeding!!! I came to the conviction that if I would not breastfeed my baby even once I would loose my milk all together. So much anxiety...I felt a terrible mother for giving him some formula and even my doctor made me feel like I wasn't doing enough to fully breastfeed him when I actually was so exhausted that it was ridiculous to even ask more from my body...thanks for this reminder for my next baby :)
Awe Susan, thanks fo sharing. I think i can say me too 🙋🏻♀️ to sooo much of what you said on how you felt/what you did with your first vs your second. I almost cried recalling the anxiety of timing how long he stayed on each boob, how long in btwn naps, how long naps were, etc. Im so glad the second time around was a much gentler experience. Its so amazing how similar our experiences were.
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I'm so glad to hear a momma these days who admits she's being flexible with her newborn instead of following rigid rules and schedules!!! I know I'm older and old fashioned but I wish new mommas would relax a bit and not make life so hard for themselves and the babies!!!
I'm glad my baby easily naturally fell into a cycle (or schedule) by a few months old, as it helped us both. I was determined to teach her to sleep through the night as soon as possible. Brain needs that. Eating just followed. But the schedule was not rigid by any means, we tweaked it till about 6 months and again dropped a nap at 7 (on her terms). Sure we get fuss at bedtime, but that depends on the mood rather than whether it's 7,8 or 9.
It's so difficult to put a newborn on a schedule- just have to go with the flow for the first couple of months. I found most babies will naturally put them selves in to a schedule eventually.
Exactly and each baby is so different! I’ve learned that letting them cry a little to finish that last dish or letting them sleep through 1 feeding etc. it’s ok! See how your baby is and go from there! And all these new gadgets people buy lol what if your baby doesn’t like it! Just relax and let things fall into place naturally
InstaBlaster.
We are asked to be productive very early after the baby arrive. We HAVE to try and set up some regular routine so we can work and not die of exhaustion
This was so raw and honest. It's beautiful to see how motherhood evolves with time and with each child. Thank you for your honesty.
I love how you are so middle ground about babies. Co-sleeping and sleep training, breastfeeding and formula. I feel like most blogs are extremists. It encourages me that you can drop a bit of both
I also gave my baby formula and I was so glad because it reduced my stress. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing and that realization has actually resulted in my baby getting MORE breast milk!
Thank you so much for being so brave and honest about co sleeping (safely) and introducing formula early if you don't have enough milk right away... there's so much shaming of new moms for these things so it's so nice to see this.
I hope these tips help! I wish I would have known all of this the first time around, but I guess we all have to experience it. Side note: the lighting on my left side is WAY brighter, so if my makeup looks darker on the right side, it’s because of that. 🤪
She is so precious moving her arms all around! Congratulations!
I’m a hospital newborn RN and constantly see the frustration when baby instantly prefers the bottle and has a very difficult time breastfeeding after that. I’d say definitely don’t give a bottle the first week. Use a syringe or medicine dropper to supplement at the breast or just a medicine cup. At least use a Dr. Brown’s bottle with premie nipple and baby side lying to control the flow of milk, because many babies do instantly frequently prefer the fast and easy flow of a bottle. Lack of information makes my job way more difficult than it has to be and also results in mothers in tears because baby stops taking the breast.
Susan Yara I’m a first time mom to my 3 week old daughter Eila Nicole (our daughters have the same name😆) and I noticed that we’re doing a lot of the same things like co-sleeping, transitioning from breast to bottle, to leaving the baby with someone for just a couple hours. It’s nice to know that someone else is kinda doing the same thing cause it makes you feel like your not doing anything wrong. I’ve gotten a few disapproving looks for leaving her with my husbands mother but honestly there is no shame in getting a few moments to yourself. I learned a lot from you, thank you!! 😁💕
I find it really depends on the person. I had my child when i was 23 and I studied nursing RN in uni. I was pretty well equipped with knowledge and experience since i was placed at labour and delivery. I was a pretty chill mom. I didn't really have schedules or anything like that. I let my baby hold rule and just followed his lead. It led him to be much happier and me being much happier as well. Everyone is different. Everyone parents different. I had so many of my aunties telling me im spoiling him but how do you spoil a newborn who only wants milk and cuddles?? Just do you hun!
It's so true! I'm a nurse and was also a nanny for years in addition to the experience I had with my siblings. So I felt very prepared when my son was born. It was an easy easy transition. The hardest part was our extended family's pressure, judgement, and need for time time time. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted and none of it was the baby 🤷♀️
I been strictly breastfeeding my 4 month old baby. There are times I feel so drained, and I even feel ashamed for even thinking of introducing formula to her. The internet does not help either, you just want the best for her, but mom shaming its so so real!
Honestly im 5 months with my first and i dont think ill be breastfeeding for a long time...
Idk i was a formula baby and i came out fine...
I don't feel women should feel guilty for saving energy yourself to be a more effective you
Wow, this is the most refreshing motherhood video I have ever seen in my entire freaking life. I’m still in the first year of having baby home as we spent two months in the nicu and I’m finally starting to relax. Thanks for this breath of fresh air.
Thankfully both of twins slept in their bassinets the whole night because I was adamant about not bed-sharing. Then when the turned 8 months, I was hospitalized for over a week, and my mom got them dependent on being rocked and held in their sleep. It has been a nightmare to break the habit but they're finally getting better now at 12 months.
Hearing these comments have been so relieving for me as I've struggled with what I "think" should be the "right" way of doing things and it's just led to a lot of stress and frustration. From strictly wanting to breastfeed because of "nipple confusion" and not knowing what's really in formula to trying not to freak out because he's crying..and on occasion wanting to strangle my hubby for the first time EVER in our 10 yr relationship...It's so nice to hear that what's going on and what I am doing shouldn't make me feel bad. Thank you Susan for being so real about these topics! It's very encouraging!
Mix feeding is okay, saved babies from life threatening situations, don't be ashamed to introduce formula #fedisbest
dalam indira there are some downsides. So it’s always good to give mum all the information so she can make an informed choice that works for her and baby
This is so true but its hard when you get mom shamed about it by literally everyone, including your doctor bc you can produce milk but its just not enough... :(
So true, it’s all about fed is best, regardless of whether the baby is breastfed or formula fed. My LO was born at a very low birthweight at 37 weeks and she couldn’t latch properly. She was bottle fed for the first month with fortified breast milk (my milk mixed with powdered formula) to help her gain weight. After she was a month old, we tried breastfeeding again and she picked it up no problem with help from our lactation clinic. She still had a bottle everyday from her daddy but we never had issues with nipple confusion with her. Every baby is different, every situation is different.
sammikit you’re so lucky! My baby preferred bottle over my breasts but I still give her my milk I just pump every couple of hours. I think that’s the main reason my supply dropped significantly
Leah McKenna I always dream to breastfeed I desperately tried, I encourage moms, breastfeeding is best , I was body shamed for not producing enough milk, but our doctor was supportive, she understood that we tried everything but when baby's weight was drastically falling, we opted for mixed feeding
Also, something I learned recently is that milk doesn’t “come in”. It’s all milk. Colostrum, transition milk, and normal milk is all milk so there is no need to stress. It all gives your baby nutrition and it’s all good! This idea that milk needs to “come in” is just not true. Thank goodness!
Danielle Calder totally agree it’s all good milk but I think they refer to “coming in” as when your milk shifts from colostrum to milk and you can get the huge hormonal surge. I ended up with fevers and shakes around day 4-5 with each of my babies because of the milk kicking in, I guess because it can sometime affect Mum so much they’ve named it 😊
Thank you ! Someone said it ! It really my biggest pet peeve that colostrum is the best for the baby
Yes so true. Their tummies are so tiny that all they need is that colostrum for the first couple days.
yeah it does actually. My milk never really came in at all and my son was hungry and losing weight, had to switch to formula. not having enough milk is part of milk not coming in
Amen sister! Unnecessary stress, this is real and needed to be heard.
YESSSSS!! I Absolutely loved this video♡ Its wonderful to see a mom admit to co-sleep with their baby. I thought i was the only one and it made me feel so guilty. I didnt know what i was doing wrong, i saw all these moms who say their babies sleep in their bassinet through the night. Co-sleeping gave me sanity and I wish more moms admitted to do it too. Thank you for this amazing raw and realistic video 💕💕
I totally agree!
I was crying last night watching videos of moms who had a baby with a toddler in the mix. Watching this makes me feel like there’s hope I won’t be a total
mess. Thank you 🙏🏻
It’s also good to try soothing them with your voice before picking them up that way they can learn to be comforted by your presence even when you aren’t physically sitting with them :)
Best video ever, Susan Yara! Glad you are taking a more relaxed approach to motherhood this time around and enjoying getting to know your baby.
I watched this video when my baby was two months old and now I'm watching it again, when my baby girl is a year old. So many things you say about the first time around resonate with me and the second time around I hope I'll loosen up a bit. Thank you for sharing, it takes some big ass balls to share your thoughts and opinions for the world to see (and judge). You go momma! xx
Loving that you’re cosleeping! I have coslept all 3, and like you was so much harder on myself following the “rules” of schedules with my first. Then I realised they aren’t robots. Sometimes I get tired early, sometimes I can’t fall asleep, sometimes I wake up feeling crappy, sometimes happy, sometimes I’m hungry for lunch at 11am, sometimes not hungry at all during the day. Why would babies not be the same, they’re human too x
I’m currently 40 weeks and 2 days with my second, and I’m loving these videos! Thank you for being real and sharing your experience!
I just wanted to thank you, my family judged me because they kept saying I wouldn't know how to care for my first child and all of your videos helped me so much. I adore all your videos 💙
Our Ozair is 10 weeks -- just a bit older than Ayla, but he's my first. My biggest issue is that I want to constantly strangle my husband! This video definitely encouraged me to chill out more. His work hours are insane, and I didn't enjoy being at home with the baby almost 24 hours by myself. Thank God for mommy groups. I'm back at work now and it's been so much better since I get more balance in my day. Can't imagine how you're doing it with two! And you look beautiful! Go mama!
Anum Qassam it takes a while mama. Lots of hard times, sleep deprivation, a brand new world. Honestly, the first year is the toughest in terms of lots of things (adjusting to a brand new life) which includes your relationship. I promise it gets better. You’re doing amazing! xx
This is currently me I am almost 3 weeks postpartum and feel the same am home with 3 kiddos ages 3..2 and my newborn and all doing it by myself my husband leaves to work at 5 am and returns at 8 -9 pm so u can imagine how I feel plus I have 2 older children in school ages 11 and 8 and no help and at times I just feel like craying 😭
I love your honesty, openness and vulnerability in these videos, that’s why I love watching you. But you’re also effortlessly classy and savvy!
Susan!!! Yesss!!! I have been following along during your pregnancy and feel like there were SO many of your videos where I was feeling exactly the same way (almost verbatim!). So happy for you and your family - it’s so much better being a bit kinder to ourselves and ‘allowing’ ourselves to go with the flow. Thanks for another great video
Thank you so much for this video! I’m a first time mom, and my baby is three weeks old. What you shared has made me feel so much better about a lot of the decisions my husband and I have made for our newborn. I was super stressed for the first two weeks, but I’m finally getting to a place where I am trusting my instinct.
Love that you were real about the Co-sleeping part of having a baby. Sometimes they just need their mama to be by their side.
LOVE THIS! I do all of these as a first time mum and secretly felt a bit ashamed of things like cosleeping and formula feeding, but it just felt right for me! So so happy this is being shared.
I stressed (and still do) about my baby and his sleep. I tried sleep training for months. I would watch your videos and others and read books about it and cry wondering why my baby just wouldn't sleep through the night. I'm glad you're more open about co-sleeping with you're baby. I honestly believe too that people aren't truly honest about it. Thanks for sharing that.
I am 26 weeks pregnant with my first and I have been a nut case wanting things to be perfect. I needed this video to give me some perspective. With your first it's like traveling to space for the first time so you over compensate not knowing what you will need or how to handle different scenarios. This was reassuring to a new mom and reminded me babies don't need a lot. I will focus on just getting to know my baby. Make that my new montra
I've said it before but it bears repeating, baby Ayla is so adorable! Now that I've got that out of my system. Susan I'm glad that you're taking a much more relaxed approach to parenting this time around. I think this way you'll get more joy out of things instead of being stressed out. You have carried a baby around for 9 months and went through a c section. No need in adding additional unnecessary stress. Your body's still recovering and you are adjusting to a two child and a cute dog household. And it's sweet that your husband makes you breakfast. I hope you find a house that you like. One of my hobbies is looking at houses on Trulia. It's interesting to see the different price points in different areas.
im currently expecting my first child and im loving all this helpful advice! Thank you so much, I would love to see a video on things you wish you knew during your first pregnancy and post birth.
I love that you mentioned giving formula in the hospital until your milk came in. I have a lactation consultant yell at me for it. I have successfully breastfed two children. A little formula wont kill them! or sabotage milk production! Great tip
Currently pregnant with baby#2 and came across your video. WONDERFUL advice. Definitely going to do my best to remember this
Ah the letting her cry thing for a minute or so is so true for the second one especially me... :) I too have been relaxed about it.
For new moms. I did the breastfeeding+ bottle but one thing that my pediatrician suggested (that I personally liked very much and found beneficial) is to introduce a bottle as a “reward” after you breastfeed. She explained that it’s easier for the baby to get the milk from the bottle and many babies don’t want to “work hard” after they know the milk is easily available. I followed that instruction and my baby was a combination of breastfeeding and a bottle till he was 9 month old. (Then he started to bite REALY BADLY😅 but that’s a different story). Bottom line, I do agree that having both options available is much less stressful.
It’s interesting how having a second ( my case third ) can change things so much. 😊
I just had my first baby(9 months ago), & your experience was so similar to mine. I don’t know if I want a second one, but I feel comforted knowing it gets better.
Thank you for being real! I’m 16 months postpartum and first baby! Only one and I did the same thing your doing now, and yes other people make you feel bad for it! And tell you what they did and how much better it is! And what you shouldn’t do! So much pressure to do it how others tell you !and not listen to our instincts! And what works for you! Then you feel you have to hid it! And feel your doings everything wrong! People should respect our choices and support it! Not make you feel bad you’re not listening to their advice!
LOVE THIS VIDEO! This is almost identical to my second time around. I have an 11 day old newborn baby and a 2 year 3 month old. I too am a fan of being flexible in the early days and being more relaxed and just going with the flow. I think this does come with being an experienced parent, you're just less afraid in general and more confident in what you know and are doing and so trust yourself more to do what works for you and your baby instead of what others say you should be doing. I also co-sleep and it has been amazing, I get so much more sleep this way than I did with my first when i was trying to get him to sleep on his own in his crib. The back and forth throughout the night is killer and really all baby wants in those early days is to be close to you which is completely normal and understandable! Thank you for sharing your experience, I'm so happy to know, there are other moms out there who have the same approach to the newborn stage!
Love this more casual approach to scheduling the first several weeks. It's the first time I've really heard someone talk about this, and it's really calmed a lot of my anxiety. Thank you!
That baby is ADORABLE! The second ones so much easier we know what to do..❤️😍
Heck yeah! Love this video. Super honest, no shame and a proud mommy. Fed is best. Everyone else needs to get over themselves. You’re the mom and a good one. You saw she needed more food and helped her which is our job. No mom shaming! When I was a first time mom they told me the bottle was traumatizing my baby.. She is completely fine and so happy. People say weird things. Go you and go this video.
Totally agree with introducing bottle early. Did not do with first baby and so regretted it. I didn't know much first time around and will recommend all new moms to introduce bottle as early as possible.
I Love The Colour Pink Why wouldn’t they need milk after 6 months? Breast milk or formula is recommended until at least age 1 if not longer.
I love what you said about the bottle and formula right off the bat. People wayyyy freak out moms with nipple confusion!
I’m a hospital newborn RN and constantly see the frustration when baby instantly prefers the bottle and has a very difficult time breastfeeding after that. I’d say definitely don’t give a bottle the first week. Use a syringe or medicine dropper to supplement at the breast or just a medicine cup. At least use a Dr. Brown’s bottle with premie nipple and baby side lying to control the flow of milk, because many babies do instantly frequently prefer the fast and easy flow of a bottle. Lack of information makes my job way more difficult than it has to be and also results in mothers in tears because baby stops taking the breast.
I introduced bottle and formula on day 6, because my nipples were so sore and my midwife told me to do it. It took so much pressure from me and really helped me to enjoy nursing afterwards. Now he is 11 weeks old and only gets formula maybe once a week.
TubnQT i think I’ll introduce a bottle maybe in week 2 or 3 and let my fiancé feed him. I will be using slow flow nipples.
I was told 2-4 weeks is the best time to introduce the bottle intermittently to get baby used to it. That way they have at least 2 weeks to get your milk supply established and learn to latch. But it’s very important to introduce pretty early on as a lot of babies will not take a bottle or be very picky with bottles after about 3 months
Thank you talking about co sleeping. Everything you said was spot on.
Great tips! Thanks for the advice Susan and I'm so glad you're are feeling more chill and relaxed this time around! All the best to you and your beautiful family!
I agree, I tend to put babies on a schedule but they never follow it, they’re always changing every day so I’ve just learn to go with the flow. Susan, you look great after baby #2 she looks a lot like your hubby, very strong Indian features and lots of hair! She’s going to be gorgeous growing up.
Being a first time mom and being afraid and not knowing what I’m doing made the thought of having a second child really scary but this video gives me hope in having a second child! It’s nice to know you can learn and be chill the next time around.
Yes to all of this! It doesn't get easier each time a new baby comes but we get better with experience.
I’ve actually been battling with myself wether or not to have a second kid. Because all of what you said about the first is so true. It was so hard during the first few months, I am so type A, I was stressed out about everything. And definitely I was so annoyed with my hubby even if he was doing so much to help now that I think about it. But again, you make it seem so easy this time around. Makes me wonder if we can really handle a second one or if you’re just super and natural at this mother thing! Congratulations again!
I was exactly the same, my milk was coming in really slowly and my newborn was super hungry all the time. So I decided even though I originally wanted to only breastfeed, it was more important that he gets all the nutrition when he needs. I did feel guilty that I didn't have enough milk but now looking back, I'm glad I introduced formula when my milk wasn't enough.
I’m a mom, childcare provider, and grandma. What you’re sharing sounds like you’re now an experienced mom, doing things naturally! Just being open to what a child needs and providing w/o all the made up rules, is the best way! Sounds great 💛
I love what you said about co-sleeping! Doing it safely and intentionally vs. groggy and unexpectedly is so important!!
I Love The Colour Pink shoo, troll.
I agree to disagree. Susan has listed a great resource in the description of this video explaining how to safely co-sleep.
@I Love The Colour Pink after reading a countless amount of your comments you seem to be very closed minded and I feel bad for you. 🤷♀️
Your so honest and its very insightful and enlightening
""It helped me to not feel stressed about my milk coming in." YES! Formula allowed me to relax enough to be able to breastfeed. No one told me that could be a possibility but supplementing with formula definitely made our breastfeeding journey possible.
Please do an updated second time around baby must haves! ❤️
She’s gorgeous! 🌸 edit: you make a great tip about allowing Dads to be more hands-on.
I have no kids, I just love Susan!
Melindah Mkhwanazi same 🎈
Same 😀
I don't know about the whole nipple confusion thing but thank goodness your introducing a bottle. It will makes it so much easier for the people in your life that spend time with baby with out you. I kept my best friends baby over night one time when he was about 7 months old and he was strictly beast fed. He would not take a bottle for nothing. He literally gagged and cried and cried for hours. I felt so bad for him. I ended up calling his Mommy and told her to come feed her baby!!!!
I'd like to see a video about how you feel when strangers approach you too look, or try to touch your baby and how you handle those situations along with family members who are sick, have been near sick people or children who want to hold Ayla. I have a hard time explaining to people that I don't feel comfortable with them being so close to my infant and they seem to get upset very easily when I say "no, please back away from my child".
I'm a first time mom of a six month old. Your tips are exactly how I feel when I do this the second time around. I got roped into those negative stigmas about the formula and had her cry really hard the first few days until my milk came in. I regret so much listening to the docs. She was also 6.1 and had dropped weight and jaundice so eventually they recommended that we give her some formula but after those agonizing few days. Then we avoided giving her a bottle because people warned us about nipple confusion and now our baby won't drink from the bottle and she's completely attached to me. Also with you on the co sleeping and feelings about the husband. I'm saving this video to remind me when we have a second baby!
Second to introducing formula and bottle early. My baby had jaundice and the most important thing to me was he eat enough and pooped enough in the first week. So I gave him formula the 2nd day and I’m so glad I did that. My baby accepts all kinds of bottles and formula now while being breastfed. It makes both of our lives much easier.
Such a helpful video, thank you! 29 weeks pregnant with my first and this is like having a friend that gives you honest advice 😘
Your little one is a doll 💖
I love your thoughts and feedback on the husband situation! That is SO true for me and lots of my friends, and I feel like it’s something no one talks about.
I love your video, I had baby girl 4 months ago and for the first couple months I had so much anxiety about everything. People around me didnt help much and judged my every move. But now I'm so much more comfortable. I didnt co sleep and I wish I did, but I started co sleeping about a month ago. I love it!!! I didnt have enough supply to feed her so I introduced formula from day 2. Everyone judged me for that. Being a first time mom was stressful enough already. I feel like next time it will be alot easier for me.
Totally agree on schedule for baby. I have two boys. 4 and 2 years old. First boy, schedule on dot!!!. Cry out method. 2nd time, go with flow. He cry, feed him, change and cuddle him. Enjoy ur baby girl. Soo sweet. Kinda miss my older one when he was baby, didnt do much cuddle with my older one. Sadddd...
I love realizing that things can be done different the second time around, I will definitely take all these into consideration when I have my second!
I recognized myself in the way you did with your first baby. Thank you for sharing this! It is so nice to hear and that is how I’m imagine our second try😀less stressfully and more enjoying!
Being a Mom it's really amazing yes it's hard but reword is monumental, I have 2 kids, my daughter hated cosleeping she wanted her space but my second baby boy loved it and yes feeding was so easy.
Omg i needed this video in my life. FTM here n ugh yes the rules n time the crying the night not sleeping in crib...EVERYTHING. Ppl tell me i HAVE TO follow & part of me wanted to go with the flow & i always got the NO U HAVE TO FOLLOW N STAY ON IT. im glad it will be ok if i just go with my instinct bc ugh i have not eaten nor slept in daysssss.
Omg the co sleeping thing is something funny. My sister had a hard time with her first child and didn’t co sleep at all. It was to the point as my nephews uncle I just started to sleep with him when he was a baby at 3 weeks and I didn’t know about the fears about why you don’t co sleep with a child. I slept in a recliner and held him in between my legs and just kept him there and he would wake up at 5am and that’s when my sister would wake up and be ready for the day. Baby’s sleep in your stomache naturally for 9months so I do find it easy to just co sleep from the beginning. I slept in a recliner for 6months and hurt my back and had to get massages for a long time to correct the pain. The 2nd and 3rd child she was on her and her husband with co sleeping with her babies and they finally knew the pain I had dealt with.
OMG! New baby?!?! I’ve been so busy with my first one I didn’t even know you were preggers with the second! Congratulations!!! You made the first one look so easy I don’t know how you do it.
I did most of the things you did with my first kid... even though every choice i made worked out for me, i was carrying the guilty now and then... after watching your video i am totally out of guilty 😊 thanks for sharing there truth👍
You touched on this but could we possibly have a list type video on what you ended up getting for baby number 2/what things from the first time round made a reappearance?
Congratulations on Baby Ayla, she’s so beautiful!!
Cosleeping saved my sanity. My son slept with me from a week old to one year old. He started sleeping through the night naturally at 3 months old and I truly believe it’s because he caught on to our routine and being in bed with me showed him he was safe.
100% agree with your "nipple confusion" comment. Never felt like that was a real thing. My experience and anyone I know who introduced the bottle early on didn't encounter this issue.
Oh my gosh Susan I can totally relate to most of the points you ve made! Ive just had my second baby (around the same age as yours) and I consciously making an effect not to worry about schedules etc and go with the flow! Its really nice to know that someone else has had a similar experience and to know nipple confusion may not actually be a thing! Thanks again for the video!!
I was very go-with-the-flow with my firstborn, my son. He co-slept because I didn’t understand sleep training or scheduling at all. He was very chill during the day and only woke up during the night for a quick feeding and fell back asleep. Naturally he fell into sleeping on his own throughout the night (12 hours straight) at 10 months and one 2-hour nap during the day after having co-slept with me that whole time. I didn’t have to train or anything. With my second, my daughter, I began sleep-training right away just to manage time better with having to still care for my son, as well. She was my super fussy one and I thought I was dealing with a colicky baby until after two months, she suddenly stopped being so fussy. She’s four months now and she has three scheduled naps a day and sleeps 12 hours at night only waking twice to feed very quickly and conk back out again. Personally it’s been easier sleep training the second time around, more out of necessity. But every baby and every parent is different, as well as circumstances. Whatever works for each person! Not every situation is going to apply for everybody so don’t stress- whether you’re a new parent or more experienced one.
The camera switched way too much. Perhaps change the cameras less often? Or is this some kind of zoom in function?
Marit Lember I didn’t even notice this until I read your comment lol
Marit Lember ugh! Haha why did you have to point this out now I can’t stop pointing it out
Agreed!! So distracting!!! Feeling a little motion sick!!
Ahhhh why did you have to point this out! Now I can’t focus on anything else
😂😂😂
I love sooo many things you mentioned in this video. My first baby is now 4 weeks old and I feel like I have learned soooooo much. Like how you mentioned the cosleeping thing. He lasts maybe 30 minutes sleeping in his bassinet which makes for a longggg night! But all I heard was terrible things about cosleeping.. well about after a week of doing that and getting no sleep we now cosleep and get 2-4 hour stretches of sleep!
My first baby, I bought everything brand new and formula feed since I had no breastfeeding education. Second baby is a co-sleeper, breastfed, and wearing hand-me-downs. It's easier this time around!
I remember you mentioned brushing babies head when in the tub to help alleviate cradle cap. That was one thing I started doing soon after our daughter was born, and I absolutely feel that's why she hasn't had cradle cap, so far! Thanks for your videos!
These types of videos are dangerous for me, now you have me thinking I’m ready for baby #2 😭❤️
So we just brought home our first baby 11 weeks ago, and like you I was terrified about him sleeping with us and wanted to put him in his crib right way. The hubby felt the complete opposite and honestly I’m really glad that I gave in. Our little guy was definitely a night owl for a minute there but now that he sleeps with us he’s sleeping a lot better at night and is a lot easier to put to bed also.
Susan, you’re my kinda momma! I just had a baby in August and I literally could have made this video verbatim!!! Cosleeping ☑️Formula☑️ bottle☑️ less clutter ☑️. This was my second too and things went so much smoother. Ok
Thank you for calling out the breastfeeding pressures. I had no milk when I had my daughter. I kept trying and trying but nothing came out. I tried everything and the hospital and my husband thought I was quitting on breastfeeding and made me feel like a failure. I wish I had understood milk supply and I wish they had noticed because I blamed myself. My milk came in 2 weeks after I had her.
This is so me with my second son. Everything is much less stressful just chill and I think the baby feeds off that he is so much more calm than my first. And husband has been a great help as well lol 😂
Omg I can’t agree more about the formula and breastfeeding. With my first I struggled to ensure I only breastfed and she was hungry. I pumped after each and every feed including all night. I didn’t introduce a bottle until 6 weeks. It made the initial period much more difficult.
This time I told myself I was open to formula. The second night she cluster fed for 7 hours and I was soooo tired from my long labour and I gave formula in the hospital. She slept. I slept. She was happy. It made everything so much more relaxed. And I am now doing both at 3 months still and I can go out and have someone watch her or go to sleep and someone else can watch her and feed her. It’s just so much more free and I’m a better mom.
I also am with you on the letting them cry a bit more. Same. I just can’t get to her immediately with a 2 year old.
@susanayara I have done the exact same co sleeping arrangement with all 3 of my kiddos. My husband always co sleeps with our next smallest child while I sleep with the baby (they're all 2 years apart). Works great for everybody's sleep! And it hasn't affected "our alone time." When everybody is asleep you make the effort 😉🤣.
I did everything you said with my first baby and honestly I felt it was a breeze the first few weeks, trying to fall into what people tell you would work best for you doesn’t always work for everyone.
I loved that you mentioned co-sleeping.
Can you do a video of products you used/held onto for this time around?? You talked about the skin care stuff but what else have you been using??
Wow! I agree with everything in this video. I just had my second baby 3 weeks ago. I have been so much more laid back about everything. I've even gotten more sleep this time around because I went straight to cosleeping as well and I'm not worried about my milk because I know more of what to do this time around breastfeeding. 💕
Loved this!! I would really love to see a video on what products you used for baby #2. The minimalism is speaking to me ☺️ I’m 12 weeks and starting a registry, it’s so easy to get carried away! A friend suggested I add a request to fam/friends for maid services, as well - so clever!
Love your perspective on formula! My son is 10 months and I’ve been so nervous to give it to him but nothing comes out when I pump!
Oh my gosh... totally relatable!!! I am pregnant with my second child and when I think about my first child I was so stressed out... I didn’t appreciate my husband at all even though he was doing a lot. This time around I will absolutely do things differently... very nice video. Enjoyed watching it 👍👍👍
I wish I saw a video like this when I had my first baby instead of all the videos that terrified me about breastfeeding!!! I came to the conviction that if I would not breastfeed my baby even once I would loose my milk all together. So much anxiety...I felt a terrible mother for giving him some formula and even my doctor made me feel like I wasn't doing enough to fully breastfeed him when I actually was so exhausted that it was ridiculous to even ask more from my body...thanks for this reminder for my next baby :)
Awe Susan, thanks fo sharing. I think i can say me too 🙋🏻♀️ to sooo much of what you said on how you felt/what you did with your first vs your second. I almost cried recalling the anxiety of timing how long he stayed on each boob, how long in btwn naps, how long naps were, etc. Im so glad the second time around was a much gentler experience. Its so amazing how similar our experiences were.
I loved this and love your honesty. It is so refreshing. Especially the Husband part.