Thanks so much for watching and letting me be honest, across cultures and countries. Life is complicated and things are never black and white and I hope this channel can continue to bring that much needed nuance and understanding to the expat/dual citizen space on RUclips.
You need to stop listening to other's negativity and if you suffer from it get a S.A.D light as it helps my winter depression and bit D. What have I been up to, well mostly not been walking as fell on my badly placed flask and crunched spine ribs area on right on the day the Queen died 15th June then fell out of bed trying to not wrench my back in November and did the left side in 👍 which now the pains gone has fixed my right side 🤯 apart from pain I've been going to work by shankes pony as car failed MOT and not cost effective to get it fixed. Sold online scrapage scheme for nearly the £500 it would have cost and got rd tax back too. So work, home & save for a car on 4 day working week.
Please do, as your content is likely to improve even more due to wanting to do it, rather than feeling that there weren't any other options for you. As you say/allude to, we can't change the weather or overall culture in the UK, but we can change our reactions to it. Well done and glad for your honesty 👏👏
Felt so sympathetic - I have watched a lot of your vids and cannot understand why my fellow Brits would comment negatively the way you describe (I don’t usually read the comments). You’ve always been fair and balanced and TBH flagged some things I too think are not the best about the U.K., but in a very humble way. Don’t let them grind you down - you’d be a great friend to have btw!
I'd like to say that I do understand how it is moving to another country. I met my wife in 2018 and we married in 2019 and I moved from England to her native Germany. Culture shock! We lived in the Bavarian countryside. Brexit happened, then covid-19! I couldn't visit my family who were just 2 hours flight away! My wife was diagnosed with cancer in 2020 and I cared for her until she passed away in December 2022. My life that I thought I had in Germany suddenly fell apart without her. I've returned to England but it's taken me month's to adjust back.
Nice to have you back. & give yourself a pat on the back for having the intelligence to recognise the fact that you have a problem & the courage to take the necessary steps to remedy it. Never forget that you had the balls that 99% of the rest of the world lack in that you uprooted yourself & tried something new.
As a Brit myself I'm glad to welcome you again into our Culture, I'm happy that you have taken the time for yourself and find out who you are in England, keep up the good work your Awesome
thankyoungone girl for your big confession.sorry it so belated.glad things are better now. i have been a widow for 18 month sand because i have more time to myself now i discovered your channel its good;and there is no one to stop me viewing it. so keep going and cheering us all up.west london girl.
I hope that a year on from this video - it's now early April 2024 - that you continue to feel happy, settled and at ease with this part of your life here in the UK. RUclips presents videos belatedly / out of order of their original postings so please forgive my apparent tardiness in responding a year later. Good luck, anyway, on your ongoing lifestyle imorivements, increased happy status and additional friendships. p.s. Have you tried using a SAD Light device to help increase your 'winter blues' / Seasonal Affected Disorder... I hear they can be expensive but useful. 🤔🏴 🙂❤️🖖Live Long and Prosper🖖❤🙂
Moving to live in a different country must be very hard but you must come to terms with it or it will rip you apart. My son has just got engaged to his US girlfriend and intends on moving to the US I do hope he will be able to come to terms with the move.
I have been watching your videos from the beginning, & am relieved to hear that whatever was worrying you is being put right. I CANNOT IMAGINE why any one should post hateful comments, & hope you are able to put them out of your mind. You know yourself pretty well, and as a realist you will be all right. I have two married daughters in the USA so I can see some of what you describe but from the other end. As a native here I entirely share your view of the darkness of the winter months; I try to make it a cosy season, with lights on, fires lit, films to watch, books to read and friends to spend evenings with. With every good wish.
I never for one moment thought you hated the UK or were particularly critical of it. I think "the haters" (a very small proportion I hope) were projecting their own sad lives. I'm so glad that you're in a better place now through your own self development. England is a fantastic country, even the weather! Now, more content please!
You cannot expect the hostland to change for your sake - I am glad for you, that you did find the turn. I was experencing the same, as a German in Finland.
Very astute. Have you tried a lamp for your seasonal affective disorder? I have a routine of sitting at the computer and drinking my coffee for the first part of the day, I started putting a SAD lamp beside the computer. It doesn’t feel magical, but you'll notice an extra bit of a spring in your step when you get up - most people do between 20 and 40 minutes, it’s definitely a thing, optionally a couple of minutes in a tanning booth can help - you don’t need to actually tan, or do the times required for tanning, but five minutes every week or two can help perk you up.
I had noticed your absence from the channel, so was glad to see your latest video, and to know that you are OK. We all need time to ourselves, great to hear you are enjoying your life and the UK
Great to hear from you again. I suffer from S.A.D and find November the most depressing month of the year with the rapidly declining hours of daylight. I love the spring and summer and personally I loved the summer heatwave when it was 40C/104F even though my house doesn't have air conditioning and was like a sauna. Roll on spring! As others have commented, I admire anyone who moves abroad with all the cultural differences you have to deal with. As a quiet, introverted Brit from Surrey, I'm sure I'd struggle in the US.
Hi Geoff, thank you so much for your support and sorry to hear you're another SAD sufferer. We'll get through it! I definitely think the UK to US move would be a hugely jarring one for anyone as well...sometimes people think there aren't that many cultural differences, but wow, are they wrong!
One of the most honest reaction's I've ever watched on U-Tube. Please, please, please carry on being you. I'm a typical reaction watcher, I tune in and out, but I love that you can put what you feel out there when I cannot. I have literally just got back from visiting a friend that I've known since we started school together at five years old, and I'm a late fifties something now. Yesterday I was sitting at a small roadside bar in a small village in the hill's of southern Spain, enjoying Tapas and Beer with someone who is one of my oldest friends on the planet. He gave up this British lifestyle and sought what he really wanted, and is living his dream. It may not be for everyone but I can see why it is him, and we all deserve the chance to be who we want to be. I envy him and I envy you, ignore what folks say you should want, go for what is you ... :-)
Very brave of you to be so honest. I think the vast majority will fully appreciate your situation and yes I too dislike how quickly it gets dark this time of year. Still looking forward to your future videos.
Sorry to hear about your situation. It's a real bummer when you find yourself stuck in a thing that you can't escape from. Hope things get better for you. G K Chesterton said he liked the four seasons because he enjoyed the look of them:spring, summer, autumn, winter - perhaps that thought will help. In the winter we find we get cheer from the Christmas period with the bright lights, christmas trees, turkey dinners, christmas TV , presents , wine and other things that make it cheerful on the shortest days of winter. Perhaps that will you help you with our dark winter days. 🙂
I never thought you hated the UK. I’m glad you’re getting about and visiting places, there are some great places to visit, Westonbirt arboretum is a great this time of year with all the different coloured leaves
Fascinating and genuinely insightful take on living in another country. As a 'failed' ex-pat who moved away from the UK when I was considerably older than you, much of what you say mirrors the emotions that I tried to deal with. Unlike you, though, I think I was just too set in my ways to change radically and make a success of the situation, which led to my returning despite the many qualities of a place I had been attracted to for a very long time (and still am!). I take my hat off to you for your honesty and positive attitude and wish you all the very best for your future - wherever it may take you.
I'm so glad to see you back, and to hear that you now feel you've got a grip of your life again. I retired just at the start of the Covid lockdown, and I suddenly felt my life had lost all direction because the daily routine I lived by had suddenly vanished. It sometimes takes a while to forge new ties and pick up old hobbies and interests, but it's never too late for a fresh start. Keep up the good work!
I'm always impressed with anyone who moves to another country to live as it seems as if it's really hard to become completely integrated in the new country, as there are so many cultural differences, childhood memories, family etc. And then combined with that it seems as if you become more detatched from the original country, so become a kind of in-between citizen. It was really interesting to hear your open and honest reflections. Good luck going forward and yeah, for sure independence is key.
I have never left mainland Britain. England is a wonderful place, despite all our problems! I just want to welcome you and hope you will come to love us and all our little eccentricities.
Thanks for the honest update, I had been wondering where you had gone, but do bear in mind, you owe us RUclips watchers nothing, your life is for you to live and do what makes you happy. BTW, get a proper light! ;-)
You’re so open,so honest,so soul baring,so American.I thought at one point you were going to sign off with a new channel called: Girl Gone Home! Good to have you back.
I never thought you hated it here! I am very glad that you are happier. When my friend went to the states with his US wife he had the exact same thing. But now he is very happy there after some changes in his life. Have a great day
Lass! you go where your heart feels best! I moved all over the UK when I was young and loved the places where i lived but none of them made me feel the way my hometown made me feel! So moved back home and i still have that feeling of belonging! and I've really enjoyed your journey you're a nice lass and honest and actually quite funny in places! so don't listen to those negative nancy's and do what makes you honestly happy! lol!
Very good and honest video. I'm glad to hear that you've found a happier life but, although we're unlikely ever to meet, I'm more glad that you stayed.
I've only just see this today, it's lovely to have you back.. I'm 71 and I suffer from SAD - Seasonal Affected Disorder - every year; so my daughter bought me a Light Box. I was quite sceptical to begin with but I followed the instructions and now I get through late autumn/winter feeling less like I'm in semi hibernation and more like an active human.. I start using mine as soon as the sun starts setting by 6pm. Give it a go, follow the instructions sit and read a book while it works it's magic, after a while you'll start to feel so much better and have more energy...
You're honest, and that's one reason why I like your content. You've accepted that it's you that had to change, you made those changes and now you're life is happier. It sounds so simple, but I know how hard it can be, I've done it too. I'm just glad you had the courage to get back out there and start trying new things.
That’s London for you! I always feel London is a massive city full of strangers… it’s all work - great to visit as there’s stacks to see/do. Once you’ve traveled/worked it leaves precious little time to do anything else… hell, it’s bad enough up north - it’s another level in the south east! You’ve taken the right steps… taken up a hobby/ gym/ etc - hang in there! Even with all the greyness - there’s plenty of beauty to behold in the British countryside
I really loved this video for its honesty. Your emotions and realisation of what you needed to change in order to be happy within yourself must be a life changing moment and I'm so happy to see that change in you. Well done girl!!
This is a very important topic! I have lived in the US for 30 years now and it has definitely not always been easy. I appreciate your honesty with some of the struggles we all face ♥️ thanks
I am a Brit abroad. I left the UK in the 90's. I lived in Greece & currently in Germany. So I have dealt with different languages & alphabets. It sounds like you are on a journey of self discovery I hope you manage to find the peace of mind & happiness you are searching for.
Glad you're back. Your honesty is appreciated. I can see that your life he was not what you wanted it to be, a 4 hour round trip takes all your time and that's no life. We all need our own space and really happy for you that you have found the way to being in a good place. I think anyone who moves abroad has a special bravery. Looking forward to your new content, but don't be a Martyr to it. You have a proper life now We all only have one shot at life, so we may as well enjoy it!
So glad to see you back on the channel and what a heartfelt story. I think everyone shows the 'happy, happy' view of being an expat, but I always appreciate your honesty. As an American who moved to the UK last year, I agree about the importance of finding your own people/things to do, especially if you have a partner from the country you move to. Look forward to your future content. (Also, agree that it getting dark at 3:30/4pm is ridiculous -- it definitely feels so much darker than in the US even when you're near a city).
As a Brit who emigrated to Canada, I totally get what you went through. Imagine if you couldn't speak the language.. "I pitied myself for I had no shoes. Then I met a man who had no feet". I've been there. Good luck.
Sorry to hear about your struggles. Hope things get better from here on in. As a british person, I hate the winters myself ( lots of brits do). Wishing you all the best. You seem like such a lovely person. It’s definitely a good idea to join various clubs eg book club, art club,knitting club,tennis club etc. I love museums,galleries etc ,walking etc and it’s all free. You are so welcome here and you have every right to feel how you feel. No one should tell you how not to feel. If you feel awful and sad then people should understand and show some empathy Sending a big 🤗
I loved watching your videos in lockdown- glad you are ok. I had really bad mental health problems in 2021 in lockdown, and have been putting myself back together and doing well now. I have made big changes also, new job, new friends, new hobbies and interests and pushed myself to do them all - what a difference its made! Yes commuting is awful I gave that up, I really hate the short winter days too and I’m a Brit, its so bloody depressing- but I now make plans for those months to combat this feeling so am ready. Glad your back and OK 😀😀
Hey Caitlin, so pleased that you've been able to make positive changes in your life. I also relocated to England at the age of 18, leaving behind family and childhood friends and it was harder than I could ever havd imagined, so I understand what you're going through. Best wishes, Jeremy.
I feel that freeing yourself from the shackles of your situation, and opening yourself to new opportunities and welcoming new friends is a fundemental part of enjoying life. As you get older you realise that personal happiness is of paramount importance. I am a Brit, but i think everyone has felt like you did from time to time. Glad you worked it out.. Enjoy your life! ;)
Glad you’ve found your path towards a happier day-to-day 😊 I’ve only had small 'tasters' of being in other countries - measured in weeks, but not holidays - and that was tricky enough, so making a full-on long term change seems daunting. The time everyone has lost to Covid can only have made it even tougher. Thank you for this update - long may your happier path continue.
Good for you! You have nothing to feel weird about. I'm glad you figured out a path to happiness. Your channel and others inspired me to take a Christmas trip to London for the first time in a very long time, so thank you!
there is a saying,,,,,,, life is what you make it,,,,,,,,so happy that you have found peace and happiness. i am english but have lived in spain many years and can identify with everything you say.
Well done to you. Glad your finding the UK easy to cope with, and don't worry us Brits find the winter weather a pain in the arse too. Glad to see you back and looking happy. We care.
Welcome back. We have missed you! Lovely video and ,as, ever you speak so well. So glad you are so much happier and more settled here. Looking forward to your next video.
Ma'am you have every right to say negative & positive things of the UK. You have lived there & know of what you speak. Bless you & I hope you find happiness wherever it may be. I have lived in 4 different countries & can criticize any of those countries it does not mean it is all negative. So I know what you mean.
I have only just happened upon your channel and was shocked to hear how unhappy you have been. Ignore the keyboard warriors with negative opinions and comments, the reality is they are very sad people who envy you! Living in London, or commuting into London can be very impersonal. Living further North I believe you would have found a much more friendly and accepting communities and a dramatically shorter commute and a much better work life balance! You seem to be a lovely person to me and I hope your changes you have made raise your mood, improve your life and make you very happy going forward. Good luck young lady, my advice is come to Liverpool where the people are very friendly and very accepting you will really enjoy the time you spend in my city and we would love to welcome you😁
Hiya. WELCOME BACK!!! Myself, I've been doing bugger all, quite frankly. The weather's ruined my gardening schedules as I try to get set for winter shut down but that means I'm STREETS ahead of my Christmas prep! So, swings and roundabouts. If you're going to be posting throughout the winter, though, I think you definitely need to set up a ring light or wear really, really bright colours. Or a High Vis? Stay safe. All the best to you.
I think so many of us in the UK suffer with Seasonal Depression I absolutely hate the winter months, if you're from a hot country it's going to be even worse. Also commuting into London used to send me crazy. I moved to the coast, and it made a real difference. It's even ok in the winter as you can just go to the beach and find peace. Living in the city or outside the city means all you get to see is concrete and that is another downer. Love your videos and just be happy in whatever you do, its ok to talk about how hard it is to adapt.
That was very brave of you. Never picked up there were things that made life difficult for you in UK. All the best for your future, friends and family wherever they live.
Just be you. Try to fit in as you do but ultimately be who you are. Not who you feel you need to be. That's what makes the world a more colourful and interesting place.
OMG! I'm so sorry you have been silently suffering! I think you are so full of courage. I am currently in America and I watch you bc I want to move to the UK. I think you are great!!!! I was struck by your comment about having to "keep a stiff upper lip". I'm sure that's a thing over there, but it could also mean , like, maybe you aren't getting the support you need? (trying to be nice, like maybe it's not you). Anyway, I would definitely be your friend! I think you are supper awesome and super brave and super authentic!!!!! I love watching your show!!!! ❤👍❤👍
I think that most reasonable people will just be happy that you are happier than you were. It is always good to put yourself first when you need to but it is not always easy to do. Keep moving forward at a pace that suits you and wherever you end up that is where you are meant to be.
this looks like a very truthefull vidio i went through the same thing when i moved from the uk to australia but as mutch as i still love the uk i now love australia more
I know I'm far away, but I'm glad we're friends and I am so proud of the things you're accomplishing in your job and your down time. Starting up the tours is AWESOME and I really hope that part of your business blossoms. Whatever you two decide to do, you know you've got my support . . . And a 10Things I Hate About You tour guide. ❤️ Big hugs!!!!
Trying to look on the positive sides of “a winter in GB” - yes, the evenings get dark early and it can be miserable weather wise, but this can be the time to stay inside and viewing that TV “drama series” box set that you never got around to watching, sitting comfortably on the settee, with a cup of tea and some indulgent munchables to help you “plot solve” or taking up a new hobby or learning a new craft… tracing your family tree (spurred on by watching Long Lost Family in the tellybox 😉)… and just thinking that every day that passes, is a day closer to 21st December - the shortest day - and then the nights start drawing out again! Result!! 🎉🎉😄. From about the middle of January, you can notice the slightly lighter evenings. Once January is out of the way (most boring and depressing month ever) - signs of Spring, daffodil and crocus shoots popping up…yay! The weather might still be a bit rubbish but the daylight is greater! Have you or would you consider joining a volunteer “befrienders” unit, where YOU go and visit people who are unable to get out and about for any reason and as such are feeling down and lonely? You will make friends yourself as well as providing a lifeline to people in a similar situation. Joining the WI (women’s institute)? I appreciate that it has the reputation for only being attended by middle aged women who like to make chutneys, jams and preserves etc but my local WI group is nothing like that at all! They arrange spin classes, jazz dancing, trips to the theatre/cinema etc etc and by all accounts (well, my friend really, who tells me this) they have a rage of a time and welcome all ages. Anyway, I am glad you are sort of “back” and hope that getting things off your chest has helped with your diificulties
Welcome back. Stress can screw any of us up, and getting it when you're 1000s of miles from your 'home' adds an extra couple of turns of the screw. It's hard not to focus on the haters, but they are a very tiny minority. I understand your trouble making friends. Activity clubs are your best bet in uk. They will welcome you in, and walking clubs or photography groups will get you to places you wouldn't normally go. Best of luck :)
So glad you are doing better in your life! That's a big step to take and be honest about. As for whether people notice your absence from RUclips, weirdly, less than 12 hours before you posted this, I had the passing thought that I hadn't seen anything from you in a while and went to your page to make sure I was still subscribed and/or that you were okay or had posted an update in the community tab. And I got my answer in the morning! lol. So many RUclipsrs just disappear that you can be happy that your subscribers notice when you've not been around in a while. :)
Congratulations on finding your happy place. It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there and to have realised you have to try and make your own happiness in reality. My husband passed away last Xmas and I've written off this year but I plan to start socialising again in the soon to come new year. I have just been working and no more. All the best for your future and will look forward to your new videos xx
Thank you Lynne! I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, but excited for you that you plan to start getting out there with friends again in the New Year. You've got this. Sending lots of happiness your way.
I'm glad that you have taken time to find happiness and friends of your own. It's very important to look after your mental health and more so when you live so far from your family. I'm glad that you are finally starting to enjoy being in the UK. Winter must be really hard for you coming from such a sunny place. If it becomes to much, it might be an idea to spend Winter in your home state.
Bless you. I moved abroad in 2005 with my husband and daughter to an English speaking country. I found it incredibly hard but was prepared to work at it. What dawned on me was that I missed the three Fs - Friends Family and Familiarity. When my husband started having some health issues and I found out I was pregnant with my second child I had to come back to England. My parents were unable to visit due to health issues and I felt very alone. I wanted my parents. I’m glad you have started to feel comfortable again. What you were feeling was natural x I fully understand where you are coming from.
Well done you! Your well-being is the priority and may you continue to go from strength-to-strength with your endeavours. Oh, and don’t forget the occasional video as they’re often quite humorous. Good luck!
Not an expat, but as someone who is often lonely, I can empathise with how down you were feeling. Just wanted to let you know I’m so so happy you are feeling better and have managed to improve your situation, long may it continue, wherever you choose to base yourself
Good on you Kalyn, I'm a Brit. I live alone, a shift worker who works alone so social interaction can be difficult. I have got a small but superb circle of friends and cherish every moment I can spend with them and they do got out of the way to try and fit around my shifts. But that is not always possible so it can be a couple of weeks before I see any of them or have major interaction with anyone. What I am trying to say is that if for you spending last time making these videos so that you get to spend more time with your friends is making you happy....good. I think a lot of people on here would think the same. Mental health is an important subject and looking after yourself and making sure your happy has to come first. I'm happy that you are now feeling happier
It is great to see you back here, I’ve always enjoyed your content. You’re absolutely right though. It is so important to prioritise the things that matter to you and make time to put them right. You seem to be in a much better place for doing so and long may it continue! I can identify with some of the issues that you raise even though it’s very different reasons. I’m a Brit living in the UK. Over the last couple of years I’ve been having increasing ability issues due to arthritis and because of this pandemic I don’t know when I’ll be able to get the operations I need to improve things. Although I’ve got some lovely friends obviously because of mobility issues I can’t get involved with many of the activities I used to enjoy doing with them. This has left me feeling somewhat isolated. Listening to you today has made me realise that rather than just feeling sorry for myself I need to take active and positive steps to correct this. This may mean doing different things then I could do previously but I need to explore this. Anyway, as I said it’s great to see you back and I look forward to lots of more fun filled videos from you in the future.
Hi John, thank you so much for your kind words and I appreciate your support! I do hope you use this as the push you needed to try and get involved in activities you can do rather than focusing on what you can't - I am rooting for you and all of the wonderful new experiences that you might be able to have and people you can meet by signing up for something or joining something new to try out. Have a wonderful week!
Wonderful video. I'm aa UK expat in Minneapolis and a lot of this resonates. Minneapolis is a great city (really, it is) but between work and family stresses we are not really experiencing the best of it, home most of the time, pretty insular and lacking a social life. While my wife is not from here, my social circle such as it is, is really her social circle. I'm not sure how to affect change here but I'm glad you have been able to.
Well done Kalyn for recognising the rut and doing something. Hope this give you the boost you need (even if a trip back home is needed for some Vit C top up!)
Glad to hear you've got your life back on track, and fulfilling you personal needs better. Chages on that scale take some courage and determinatio- so Bravo to you!
Hi Kalyn, That was a very candid video. I’ve never really adjusted to the winter months myself and I’m from here. As a Floridian, I’m sure they especially suck ! Without a car it can be isolating . Even close to London , with a husband and connections through him, I agree, you need your own . I'm from London originally, but live now near Aylesbury in Buckinghamshire , so understand some of what you're saying, even as a Brit. I wish you all the best in making a stronger connection here, even if in the longer term you return to the US. Whatever the future , looking towards 2023, I wish you all the best.
Thank you so much for your support Mark! Glad to know I'm not alone in feeling the winters are pretty hard - it definitely takes me a lot more effort to feel good in these months. Hope you enjoy the future videos and wishing you the best in this coming year too!
Thanks so much for watching and letting me be honest, across cultures and countries. Life is complicated and things are never black and white and I hope this channel can continue to bring that much needed nuance and understanding to the expat/dual citizen space on RUclips.
You need to stop listening to other's negativity and if you suffer from it get a S.A.D light as it helps my winter depression and bit D.
What have I been up to, well mostly not been walking as fell on my badly placed flask and crunched spine ribs area on right on the day the Queen died 15th June then fell out of bed trying to not wrench my back in November and did the left side in 👍 which now the pains gone has fixed my right side 🤯 apart from pain I've been going to work by shankes pony as car failed MOT and not cost effective to get it fixed. Sold online scrapage scheme for nearly the £500 it would have cost and got rd tax back too. So work, home & save for a car on 4 day working week.
Please do, as your content is likely to improve even more due to wanting to do it, rather than feeling that there weren't any other options for you. As you say/allude to, we can't change the weather or overall culture in the UK, but we can change our reactions to it. Well done and glad for your honesty 👏👏
I went the other way 40 years ago, so I know what you mean, it is tough but is definitely worth it....
Been here 2 years from Hawaii and California and I totally relate!
Felt so sympathetic - I have watched a lot of your vids and cannot understand why my fellow Brits would comment negatively the way you describe (I don’t usually read the comments). You’ve always been fair and balanced and TBH flagged some things I too think are not the best about the U.K., but in a very humble way. Don’t let them grind you down - you’d be a great friend to have btw!
I'd like to say that I do understand how it is moving to another country. I met my wife in 2018 and we married in 2019 and I moved from England to her native Germany. Culture shock! We lived in the Bavarian countryside. Brexit happened, then covid-19! I couldn't visit my family who were just 2 hours flight away!
My wife was diagnosed with cancer in 2020 and I cared for her until she passed away in December 2022. My life that I thought I had in Germany suddenly fell apart without her. I've returned to England but it's taken me month's to adjust back.
Nice to have you back. & give yourself a pat on the back for having the intelligence to recognise the fact that you have a problem & the courage to take the necessary steps to remedy it. Never forget that you had the balls that 99% of the rest of the world lack in that you uprooted yourself & tried something new.
As a Brit myself I'm glad to welcome you again into our Culture, I'm happy that you have taken the time for yourself and find out who you are in England, keep up the good work your Awesome
you're awesome!
thankyoungone girl for your big confession.sorry it so belated.glad things are better now. i have been a widow for 18 month sand because i have more time to myself now i discovered your channel its good;and there is no one to stop me viewing it. so keep going and cheering us all up.west london girl.
I hope that a year on from this video - it's now early April 2024 - that you continue to feel happy, settled and at ease with this part of your life here in the UK.
RUclips presents videos belatedly / out of order of their original postings so please forgive my apparent tardiness in responding a year later.
Good luck, anyway, on your ongoing lifestyle imorivements, increased happy status and additional friendships.
p.s. Have you tried using a SAD Light device to help increase your 'winter blues' / Seasonal Affected Disorder...
I hear they can be expensive but useful. 🤔🏴
🙂❤️🖖Live Long and Prosper🖖❤🙂
Moving to live in a different country must be very hard but you must come to terms with it or it will rip you apart. My son has just got engaged to his US girlfriend and intends on moving to the US I do hope he will be able to come to terms with the move.
I have been watching your videos from the beginning, & am relieved to hear that whatever was worrying you is being put right. I CANNOT IMAGINE why any one should post hateful comments, & hope you are able to put them out of your mind. You know yourself pretty well, and as a realist you will be all right. I have two married daughters in the USA so I can see some of what you describe but from the other end. As a native here I entirely share your view of the darkness of the winter months; I try to make it a cosy season, with lights on, fires lit, films to watch, books to read and friends to spend evenings with. With every good wish.
Glad you’ve found yourself
I never for one moment thought you hated the UK or were particularly critical of it. I think "the haters" (a very small proportion I hope) were projecting their own sad lives. I'm so glad that you're in a better place now through your own self development. England is a fantastic country, even the weather! Now, more content please!
On gosh so happy you turned your life around,it's not where you are it's what's in you.
You cannot expect the hostland to change for your sake - I am glad for you, that you did find the turn. I was experencing the same, as a German in Finland.
Very astute. Have you tried a lamp for your seasonal affective disorder? I have a routine of sitting at the computer and drinking my coffee for the first part of the day, I started putting a SAD lamp beside the computer. It doesn’t feel magical, but you'll notice an extra bit of a spring in your step when you get up - most people do between 20 and 40 minutes, it’s definitely a thing, optionally a couple of minutes in a tanning booth can help - you don’t need to actually tan, or do the times required for tanning, but five minutes every week or two can help perk you up.
I had noticed your absence from the channel, so was glad to see your latest video, and to know that you are OK. We all need time to ourselves, great to hear you are enjoying your life and the UK
I'm pleased that you've had the opportunity to reflect, find your feet so to speak and are in a happier place.
Great to hear from you again. I suffer from S.A.D and find November the most depressing month of the year with the rapidly declining hours of daylight. I love the spring and summer and personally I loved the summer heatwave when it was 40C/104F even though my house doesn't have air conditioning and was like a sauna. Roll on spring! As others have commented, I admire anyone who moves abroad with all the cultural differences you have to deal with. As a quiet, introverted Brit from Surrey, I'm sure I'd struggle in the US.
Hi Geoff, thank you so much for your support and sorry to hear you're another SAD sufferer. We'll get through it!
I definitely think the UK to US move would be a hugely jarring one for anyone as well...sometimes people think there aren't that many cultural differences, but wow, are they wrong!
Truss
As a 67 year old Brit, I just want to give you a hug right now .
Welcome back, good luck for the future.
One of the most honest reaction's I've ever watched on U-Tube. Please, please, please carry on being you. I'm a typical reaction watcher, I tune in and out, but I love that you can put what you feel out there when I cannot.
I have literally just got back from visiting a friend that I've known since we started school together at five years old, and I'm a late fifties something now. Yesterday I was sitting at a small roadside bar in a small village in the hill's of southern Spain, enjoying Tapas and Beer with someone who is one of my oldest friends on the planet. He gave up this British lifestyle and sought what he really wanted, and is living his dream. It may not be for everyone but I can see why it is him, and we all deserve the chance to be who we want to be. I envy him and I envy you, ignore what folks say you should want, go for what is you ... :-)
I hope you feel welcomed. I hope you find happiness
Very brave of you to be so honest. I think the vast majority will fully appreciate your situation and yes I too dislike how quickly it gets dark this time of year. Still looking forward to your future videos.
Sorry to hear about your situation. It's a real bummer when you find yourself stuck in a thing that you can't escape from. Hope things get better for you. G K Chesterton said he liked the four seasons because he enjoyed the look of them:spring, summer, autumn, winter - perhaps that thought will help. In the winter we find we get cheer from the Christmas period with the bright lights, christmas trees, turkey dinners, christmas TV , presents , wine and other things that make it cheerful on the shortest days of winter. Perhaps that will you help you with our dark winter days. 🙂
I never thought you hated the UK. I’m glad you’re getting about and visiting places, there are some great places to visit, Westonbirt arboretum is a great this time of year with all the different coloured leaves
Fascinating and genuinely insightful take on living in another country. As a 'failed' ex-pat who moved away from the UK when I was considerably older than you, much of what you say mirrors the emotions that I tried to deal with. Unlike you, though, I think I was just too set in my ways to change radically and make a success of the situation, which led to my returning despite the many qualities of a place I had been attracted to for a very long time (and still am!). I take my hat off to you for your honesty and positive attitude and wish you all the very best for your future - wherever it may take you.
I'm so glad to see you back, and to hear that you now feel you've got a grip of your life again. I retired just at the start of the Covid lockdown, and I suddenly felt my life had lost all direction because the daily routine I lived by had suddenly vanished. It sometimes takes a while to forge new ties and pick up old hobbies and interests, but it's never too late for a fresh start. Keep up the good work!
I'm always impressed with anyone who moves to another country to live as it seems as if it's really hard to become completely integrated in the new country, as there are so many cultural differences, childhood memories, family etc. And then combined with that it seems as if you become more detatched from the original country, so become a kind of in-between citizen. It was really interesting to hear your open and honest reflections. Good luck going forward and yeah, for sure independence is key.
I have never left mainland Britain. England is a wonderful place, despite all our problems! I just want to welcome you and hope you will come to love us and all our little eccentricities.
Thanks for the honest update, I had been wondering where you had gone, but do bear in mind, you owe us RUclips watchers nothing, your life is for you to live and do what makes you happy. BTW, get a proper light! ;-)
You’re so open,so honest,so soul baring,so American.I thought at one point you were going to sign off with a new channel called: Girl Gone Home! Good to have you back.
Thank you so much, Jim! Definitely not headed back to America just yet, have a lot more adventures to have in the UK. :)
I never thought you hated it here! I am very glad that you are happier. When my friend went to the states with his US wife he had the exact same thing. But now he is very happy there after some changes in his life. Have a great day
Lass! you go where your heart feels best! I moved all over the UK when I was young and loved the places where i lived but none of them made me feel the way my hometown made me feel! So moved back home and i still have that feeling of belonging! and I've really enjoyed your journey you're a nice lass and honest and actually quite funny in places! so don't listen to those negative nancy's and do what makes you honestly happy! lol!
Very good and honest video. I'm glad to hear that you've found a happier life but, although we're unlikely ever to meet, I'm more glad that you stayed.
I've only just see this today, it's lovely to have you back..
I'm 71 and I suffer from SAD - Seasonal Affected Disorder - every year; so my daughter bought me a Light Box.
I was quite sceptical to begin with but I followed the instructions and now I get through late autumn/winter feeling less like I'm in semi hibernation and more like an active human..
I start using mine as soon as the sun starts setting by 6pm.
Give it a go, follow the instructions sit and read a book while it works it's magic, after a while you'll start to feel so much better and have more energy...
Good to see you've sorted yourself out and glad that you're back. Looking forward to the next video.❤
Welcome back - I'm with you on the misery of the four hour commute to and from London.
You do You.
We will watch and enjoy.
You're honest, and that's one reason why I like your content. You've accepted that it's you that had to change, you made those changes and now you're life is happier. It sounds so simple, but I know how hard it can be, I've done it too. I'm just glad you had the courage to get back out there and start trying new things.
That’s London for you! I always feel London is a massive city full of strangers… it’s all work - great to visit as there’s stacks to see/do. Once you’ve traveled/worked it leaves precious little time to do anything else… hell, it’s bad enough up north - it’s another level in the south east! You’ve taken the right steps… taken up a hobby/ gym/ etc - hang in there! Even with all the greyness - there’s plenty of beauty to behold in the British countryside
You do what makes you happy
I really loved this video for its honesty. Your emotions and realisation of what you needed to change in order to be happy within yourself must be a life changing moment and I'm so happy to see that change in you. Well done girl!!
Thank you so much Philip, that means so much, genuinely. Appreciate your support and hope you enjoy future videos!
This is a very important topic! I have lived in the US for 30 years now and it has definitely not always been easy. I appreciate your honesty with some of the struggles we all face ♥️ thanks
I am a Brit abroad. I left the UK in the 90's. I lived in Greece & currently in Germany. So I have dealt with different languages & alphabets. It sounds like you are on a journey of self discovery I hope you manage to find the peace of mind & happiness you are searching for.
I've missed you. I'm glad you're back. You're a wonderful person and I'm glad you're happier. Please spend more time on RUclips.
Glad you're back. Your honesty is appreciated.
I can see that your life he was not what you wanted it to be, a 4 hour round trip takes all your time and that's no life.
We all need our own space and really happy for you that you have found the way to being in a good place.
I think anyone who moves abroad has a special bravery.
Looking forward to your new content, but don't be a Martyr to it. You have a proper life now
We all only have one shot at life, so we may as well enjoy it!
So glad to see you back on the channel and what a heartfelt story. I think everyone shows the 'happy, happy' view of being an expat, but I always appreciate your honesty. As an American who moved to the UK last year, I agree about the importance of finding your own people/things to do, especially if you have a partner from the country you move to. Look forward to your future content. (Also, agree that it getting dark at 3:30/4pm is ridiculous -- it definitely feels so much darker than in the US even when you're near a city).
Thank you so much for watching! Yes, it feels SO much darker, doesn't it?! Hope your own expat journey is going well!
Good on you. It's lovely to hear that thing's are going your way and that you're happier with your life now.
As a Brit who emigrated to Canada, I totally get what you went through. Imagine if you couldn't speak the language.. "I pitied myself for I had no shoes. Then I met a man who had no feet". I've been there. Good luck.
Sorry to hear about your struggles. Hope things get better from here on in.
As a british person, I hate the winters myself ( lots of brits do).
Wishing you all the best. You seem like such a lovely person. It’s definitely a good idea to join various clubs eg book club, art club,knitting club,tennis club etc.
I love museums,galleries etc ,walking etc and it’s all free.
You are so welcome here and you have every right to feel how you feel. No one should tell you how not to feel. If you feel awful and sad then people should understand and show some empathy
Sending a big 🤗
Thank you so much for your kind words, Bill! Clubs have definitely been a great way for me to meet people and I hope to join more!
Glad to see you back and happy. What have I been up to? Sod all. As usual. But that suits me fine. Looking forward to your next video.
I loved watching your videos in lockdown- glad you are ok. I had really bad mental health problems in 2021 in lockdown, and have been putting myself back together and doing well now. I have made big changes also, new job, new friends, new hobbies and interests and pushed myself to do them all - what a difference its made! Yes commuting is awful I gave that up, I really hate the short winter days too and I’m a Brit, its so bloody depressing- but I now make plans for those months to combat this feeling so am ready. Glad your back and OK 😀😀
Fair play to you. Glad things are going better for you in the UK. It's starting to get a little brighter on a evening now in December! Merry Christmas
Hey Caitlin, so pleased that you've been able to make positive changes in your life. I also relocated to England at the age of 18, leaving behind family and childhood friends and it was harder than I could ever havd imagined, so I understand what you're going through. Best wishes, Jeremy.
Thank you for your honesty, wishing you good luck for the future, and yes the weather sucks this time of year!
I feel that freeing yourself from the shackles of your situation, and opening yourself to new opportunities and welcoming new friends is a fundemental part of enjoying life. As you get older you realise that personal happiness is of paramount importance. I am a Brit, but i think everyone has felt like you did from time to time. Glad you worked it out.. Enjoy your life! ;)
Thanks so much for your support, Nick!
Hey Kalyn, great to see another one of your videos. So glad you’re ok, and enjoying life in the UK.
Glad you’ve found your path towards a happier day-to-day 😊 I’ve only had small 'tasters' of being in other countries - measured in weeks, but not holidays - and that was tricky enough, so making a full-on long term change seems daunting. The time everyone has lost to Covid can only have made it even tougher. Thank you for this update - long may your happier path continue.
Glad to see you back and you feeling better look forward to more from you in the future, take care♥️
Good for you! You have nothing to feel weird about. I'm glad you figured out a path to happiness. Your channel and others inspired me to take a Christmas trip to London for the first time in a very long time, so thank you!
there is a saying,,,,,,, life is what you make it,,,,,,,,so happy that you have found peace and happiness. i am english but have lived in spain many years and can identify with everything you say.
Welcome back, Kalyn. Your videos are always interesting and you seem like you'd be a good friend.
Thank you so much for your kind words, Alan, that is such a compliment and I do hope my new friends feel the same!
Well done to you. Glad your finding the UK easy to cope with, and don't worry us Brits find the winter weather a pain in the arse too. Glad to see you back and looking happy. We care.
Welcome back. We have missed you! Lovely video and ,as, ever you speak so well. So glad you are so much happier and more settled here. Looking forward to your next video.
Thank you so much for your support Mark, very much appreciate it!
I'm so glad you've found your place here and aren't struggling so much!
Thank you so much for your support!
Sending you a huge British hug, Kalyn! Keep the videos coming!
Take care & stay safe girl!! 😁
Ma'am you have every right to say negative & positive things of the UK. You have lived there & know of what you speak. Bless you & I hope you find happiness wherever it may be. I have lived in 4 different countries & can criticize any of those countries it does not mean it is all negative. So I know what you mean.
I have only just happened upon your channel and was shocked to hear how unhappy you have been. Ignore the keyboard warriors with negative opinions and comments, the reality is they are very sad people who envy you! Living in London, or commuting into London can be very impersonal. Living further North I believe you would have found a much more friendly and accepting communities and a dramatically shorter commute and a much better work life balance! You seem to be a lovely person to me and I hope your changes you have made raise your mood, improve your life and make you very happy going forward. Good luck young lady, my advice is come to Liverpool where the people are very friendly and very accepting you will really enjoy the time you spend in my city and we would love to welcome you😁
Hiya. WELCOME BACK!!! Myself, I've been doing bugger all, quite frankly. The weather's ruined my gardening schedules as I try to get set for winter shut down but that means I'm STREETS ahead of my Christmas prep! So, swings and roundabouts. If you're going to be posting throughout the winter, though, I think you definitely need to set up a ring light or wear really, really bright colours. Or a High Vis? Stay safe. All the best to you.
I think so many of us in the UK suffer with Seasonal Depression I absolutely hate the winter months, if you're from
a hot country it's going to be even worse. Also commuting into London used to send me crazy. I moved to the coast, and it made a real difference. It's even ok in the winter as you can just go to the beach and find peace. Living in the city or outside the city means all you get to see is concrete and that is another downer.
Love your videos and just be happy in whatever you do, its ok to talk about how hard it is to adapt.
That was very brave of you. Never picked up there were things that made life difficult for you in UK. All the best for your future, friends and family wherever they live.
Well done for getting out there, realising what you needed and going for it. I'm glad you're happier now.
Good to see you back and glad to hear you're getting more out of your real life these days too. ❤️
Good to hear from you again ,well done
Just be you. Try to fit in as you do but ultimately be who you are. Not who you feel you need to be. That's what makes the world a more colourful and interesting place.
OMG! I'm so sorry you have been silently suffering! I think you are so full of courage. I am currently in America and I watch you bc I want to move to the UK. I think you are great!!!! I was struck by your comment about having to "keep a stiff upper lip". I'm sure that's a thing over there, but it could also mean , like, maybe you aren't getting the support you need? (trying to be nice, like maybe it's not you). Anyway, I would definitely be your friend! I think you are supper awesome and super brave and super authentic!!!!! I love watching your show!!!! ❤👍❤👍
I think that most reasonable people will just be happy that you are happier than you were. It is always good to put yourself first when you need to but it is not always easy to do. Keep moving forward at a pace that suits you and wherever you end up that is where you are meant to be.
Missed your content am so glad your happier and back. Looking forward to more content. Love your stuff ❤️
You, Wandering Ravens, Yvette. You all seemed to vanish at some time due to similar problems so no need to apologise life comes first in line 🙂
I watched this post through out. In the 17th minute I literally stood up and applauded. You are a winner!
I just found your videos and loved them. Thanks for sharing your journey.
I am glad you are sorting out your issues and I look forward to your future posts.
this looks like a very truthefull vidio i went through the same thing when i moved from the uk to australia but as mutch as i still love the uk i now love australia more
I know I'm far away, but I'm glad we're friends and I am so proud of the things you're accomplishing in your job and your down time. Starting up the tours is AWESOME and I really hope that part of your business blossoms. Whatever you two decide to do, you know you've got my support . . . And a 10Things I Hate About You tour guide. ❤️ Big hugs!!!!
So grateful for your friendship!! You better believe I feel so happy everytime I use my Trader Joe's bag around town! Hope to see you soon!
@@GirlGoneLondonofficial ❤️
Trying to look on the positive sides of “a winter in GB” - yes, the evenings get dark early and it can be miserable weather wise, but this can be the time to stay inside and viewing that TV “drama series” box set that you never got around to watching, sitting comfortably on the settee, with a cup of tea and some indulgent munchables to help you “plot solve” or taking up a new hobby or learning a new craft… tracing your family tree (spurred on by watching Long Lost Family in the tellybox 😉)… and just thinking that every day that passes, is a day closer to 21st December - the shortest day - and then the nights start drawing out again! Result!! 🎉🎉😄. From about the middle of January, you can notice the slightly lighter evenings. Once January is out of the way (most boring and depressing month ever) - signs of Spring, daffodil and crocus shoots popping up…yay! The weather might still be a bit rubbish but the daylight is greater!
Have you or would you consider joining a volunteer “befrienders” unit, where YOU go and visit people who are unable to get out and about for any reason and as such are feeling down and lonely? You will make friends yourself as well as providing a lifeline to people in a similar situation.
Joining the WI (women’s institute)? I appreciate that it has the reputation for only being attended by middle aged women who like to make chutneys, jams and preserves etc but my local WI group is nothing like that at all! They arrange spin classes, jazz dancing, trips to the theatre/cinema etc etc and by all accounts (well, my friend really, who tells me this) they have a rage of a time and welcome all ages.
Anyway, I am glad you are sort of “back” and hope that getting things off your chest has helped with your diificulties
Welcome back. Stress can screw any of us up, and getting it when you're 1000s of miles from your 'home' adds an extra couple of turns of the screw. It's hard not to focus on the haters, but they are a very tiny minority. I understand your trouble making friends. Activity clubs are your best bet in uk. They will welcome you in, and walking clubs or photography groups will get you to places you wouldn't normally go. Best of luck :)
So glad you are doing better in your life! That's a big step to take and be honest about. As for whether people notice your absence from RUclips, weirdly, less than 12 hours before you posted this, I had the passing thought that I hadn't seen anything from you in a while and went to your page to make sure I was still subscribed and/or that you were okay or had posted an update in the community tab. And I got my answer in the morning! lol. So many RUclipsrs just disappear that you can be happy that your subscribers notice when you've not been around in a while. :)
Haha, what timing that you thought to check in just 12 hours before! Thank you so much for your support and I hope you continue to enjoy the videos!
Congratulations on finding your happy place. It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there and to have realised you have to try and make your own happiness in reality. My husband passed away last Xmas and I've written off this year but I plan to start socialising again in the soon to come new year. I have just been working and no more. All the best for your future and will look forward to your new videos xx
Thank you Lynne! I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, but excited for you that you plan to start getting out there with friends again in the New Year. You've got this. Sending lots of happiness your way.
its realy nice to see you everyone needs a break thats a must
Well done and welcome home.
I'm glad that you have taken time to find happiness and friends of your own. It's very important to look after your mental health and more so when you live so far from your family. I'm glad that you are finally starting to enjoy being in the UK. Winter must be really hard for you coming from such a sunny place. If it becomes to much, it might be an idea to spend Winter in your home state.
Bless you.
I moved abroad in 2005 with my husband and daughter to an English speaking country. I found it incredibly hard but was prepared to work at it. What dawned on me was that I missed the three Fs - Friends Family and Familiarity.
When my husband started having some health issues and I found out I was pregnant with my second child I had to come back to England. My parents were unable to visit due to health issues and I felt very alone. I wanted my parents.
I’m glad you have started to feel comfortable again. What you were feeling was natural x
I fully understand where you are coming from.
Well done you! Your well-being is the priority and may you continue to go from strength-to-strength with your endeavours. Oh, and don’t forget the occasional video as they’re often quite humorous. Good luck!
Thank you so much for your kind words!!
Glad things are looking up for you.
Thank you for your kind words Phil!
Not an expat, but as someone who is often lonely, I can empathise with how down you were feeling. Just wanted to let you know I’m so so happy you are feeling better and have managed to improve your situation, long may it continue, wherever you choose to base yourself
So sorry you've experienced the loneliness too, I hope it gets better for you and I really appreciate your support and hope you enjoy future videos!
Good on you Kalyn, I'm a Brit. I live alone, a shift worker who works alone so social interaction can be difficult. I have got a small but superb circle of friends and cherish every moment I can spend with them and they do got out of the way to try and fit around my shifts. But that is not always possible so it can be a couple of weeks before I see any of them or have major interaction with anyone. What I am trying to say is that if for you spending last time making these videos so that you get to spend more time with your friends is making you happy....good. I think a lot of people on here would think the same. Mental health is an important subject and looking after yourself and making sure your happy has to come first. I'm happy that you are now feeling happier
It is great to see you back here, I’ve always enjoyed your content. You’re absolutely right though. It is so important to prioritise the things that matter to you and make time to put them right. You seem to be in a much better place for doing so and long may it continue!
I can identify with some of the issues that you raise even though it’s very different reasons. I’m a Brit living in the UK. Over the last couple of years I’ve been having increasing ability issues due to arthritis and because of this pandemic I don’t know when I’ll be able to get the operations I need to improve things. Although I’ve got some lovely friends obviously because of mobility issues I can’t get involved with many of the activities I used to enjoy doing with them. This has left me feeling somewhat isolated. Listening to you today has made me realise that rather than just feeling sorry for myself I need to take active and positive steps to correct this. This may mean doing different things then I could do previously but I need to explore this.
Anyway, as I said it’s great to see you back and I look forward to lots of more fun filled videos from you in the future.
Hi John, thank you so much for your kind words and I appreciate your support!
I do hope you use this as the push you needed to try and get involved in activities you can do rather than focusing on what you can't - I am rooting for you and all of the wonderful new experiences that you might be able to have and people you can meet by signing up for something or joining something new to try out.
Have a wonderful week!
Wonderful video.
I'm aa UK expat in Minneapolis and a lot of this resonates. Minneapolis is a great city (really, it is) but between work and family stresses we are not really experiencing the best of it, home most of the time, pretty insular and lacking a social life. While my wife is not from here, my social circle such as it is, is really her social circle.
I'm not sure how to affect change here but I'm glad you have been able to.
Well done Kalyn for recognising the rut and doing something. Hope this give you the boost you need (even if a trip back home is needed for some Vit C top up!)
Glad to see you back.
Glad to hear you've got your life back on track, and fulfilling you personal needs better. Chages on that scale take some courage and determinatio- so Bravo to you!
I enjoy watching your content and fully understand that your health comes first!
Hi Kalyn, That was a very candid video. I’ve never really adjusted to the winter months myself and I’m from here. As a Floridian, I’m sure they especially suck ! Without a car it can be isolating . Even close to London , with a husband and connections through him, I agree, you need your own . I'm from London originally, but live now near Aylesbury in Buckinghamshire , so understand some of what you're saying, even as a Brit. I wish you all the best in making a stronger connection here, even if in the longer term you return to the US. Whatever the future , looking towards 2023, I wish you all the best.
Thank you so much for your support Mark! Glad to know I'm not alone in feeling the winters are pretty hard - it definitely takes me a lot more effort to feel good in these months. Hope you enjoy the future videos and wishing you the best in this coming year too!