Give Your Partner the Gift of Presence
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- Опубликовано: 18 сен 2024
- In the beginning of a relationship, there’s so much passion. So much excitement. But over time, you drift apart. The passion fades. We often accept this as a part of the cycle of a relationship. We settle into a pattern that feels more like friendship than passionate love. But you can learn how to build an extraordinary relationship. Start at www.tonyrobbin... and watch the video above for more.
There are triggers that can make both men and women turn on and off. It’s the power of polarity - the ways that masculine energy and feminine energy complement each other - that makes relationships so exciting. But this power also causes problems. Learn more about the law of polarity at www.tonyrobbin... and watch this video to learn how men can make it work for them.
In this video, Tony has a message for the guys - but ladies, you'll appreciate it too. What does your partner (whether it's the one you have or the one you desire) really, truly want? The trigger that affects women most deeply is your presence. There is nothing more powerful than presence when there’s real love involved. (Many women even respond to a man who is present but doesn’t really love them.) Presence is what opens a woman, what earns her love and loyalty.
Yet it can be difficult for men to be present. Masculine energies tend to focus on one thing at a time. This is why sports are so appealing. It’s why masculine energies can focus on problem-solving for hours. Why they’re so present when they are pursuing a woman - but that focus can wane. Feminine energies take in everything all at once. They have diffused awareness, as if they are experiencing multiple conversations at once. These polar opposite communication styles often present problems in relationships.
What makes women feel you’re not present? When you’re not honest. Most men want to be honest, but they don’t want disagreement. They get worn out by words. But disengaging turns them into pleasers - and most women don’t want pleasers. Pleasers don’t earn respect. Accommodation doesn’t produce passion, it doesn’t produce exciting intimacy. A strong presence does.
Knowing what you need to do and actually doing it is the difference between a passionate, fulfilling relationship and a friendship. Discover the power of presence at www.tonyrobbin... and give your partner that gift today. Make decisions. Tell the truth. Say what you mean. Don’t placate. Listen. And attend Unleash the Power Within to reveal even more powerful ways to take your relationship to the next level.
Unleash the Power Within is the signature event designed by entrepreneur, best-selling author and #1 personal development leader Tony Robbins. This revolutionary four-day seminar has been attended by millions of people around the world for its renowned, life-changing content.
Hosted by Tony and a team of leading experts across multiple industries, participants learn methodologies to break through all limits and create an improved quality of life with unlimited energy and passion. Each day of the event focuses on key areas of life to improve, including work, spirituality, relationships and health.
Celebrity attendees of Unleash the Power Within include actors Hugh Jackman and Gerard Butler, Grammy Award-winning musician Melissa Etheridge, television host Maria Menounos, rapper and songwriter Pitbull, snowboarder Shaun White and professional tennis player Serena Williams.
Now available as an immersive virtual event in addition to an in-person event, Tony Robbins and Unleash the Power Within are reaching more people than ever before. With record-breaking attendance, virtual events have drawn crowds of more than 30,000 people from 195 countries.
Learn more about Unleash the Power Within: www.upwvirtual...
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to hear a man explain the needs a woman has so clearly, so succinctly, just blows me away. thank you Anthony.
JEM it's just copied from the book the way of the superior man.
Hubert cumberdale So what?! at least someone is sharing this useful tip for us neglecting its reference
it's Tony though, he's a legend
Lol
tony is a god
Yes - presence... and let's distinguish that really good presence has no agenda. It is a deep listening without manipulation. That is intimacy, which creates passion.
I totally agree, especially on the "no agenda" part.
The problem being is men often do have an agenda.....sex.
That’s because too many woman use sex as a reward for good behaviour so men behave like a dog after a treat.
Men aren't women and because we want sex doesn't mean we are evil. You want me to listen to you and I want you have sex with me.
If I walked up to you and said let's have sex, would you just take your panties off. I highly doubt it, so in other words I do have to be present with an agenda. Your not thinking about what your saying, you just don't like that sometimes thats the way it is, and it's not because of men it's because of women.
As a man sex is important to me, I love sex, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that because, you like attention and affection, so long as I get what I want, you get what you want. It's only fair and right.
Leanora EmbodyTruth your point of view comes from solely what you want out of a relationship, starting not only with your needs first, but portraying our needs as evil.
So, to reverse it, as a man you wrote this:
YES - sex, and let's distinguish that really good sex has no agenda. It's deep sex without multiple dates of listening to her bull shit, that is intimacy.
Nature 101 side note: without men having an agenda there'd be no humans. This is nature, and nature naturally has an agenda. Blame nature.
The " agenda" is what makes men listen in the first place. It's not anything less or more
As a woman, I can say this is very true. The best thing is when the man is really *there* when he is physically THERE. Then, it also doesn't matter how often you see each other if the time you spend together is raw, real and full of communication (verbally or physically through touch)!
Might have just saved my butt... So simple and over looked. Thanks.
Jesse Mccrea I don’t get it. What does this mean?
@@hesohit Probably saved him from a confusing and agonizing situation where he didn't know how to be with his partner or what to do. The answer being, "Do nothing. Just be Present." :)
I really needed this. I have been everything you described. I have an amazing wife who is begging me to just be there with her and I haven't been. I keep trying to do the things I think I should be doing but they don't work because I'm not listening to her, not truly. I'm just hearing what I think she wants. Amazingly, she just wants me, she just wants an honest, sincere, real husband. I haven't been that person. Truly, I haven't. Tonight, Valentine's Day with my wife sick, I have been doing the wrong things. Going forward, that won't happen. Going forward I see I just need to engage and be open and experience the love of being with this amazing woman. Tank you Tony for posting this, and thank you to my wife
I know it's been 5 years, but I read your comment now and felt your situation deeply as it is nearly identical to mine right now. I have been really absent to my wife now she's completely exhausted of it all and wants to leave me. I'm trying hard to save our marriage, but I dunno exactly what to do and if it'll work... For now, I'm trying my best to be helpful and caring without smothering her (fearing that it may be too much opposite response at once and it might stress her and push her further away), do the things she said were missing and watching videos, content and searching for ideas to help us out and reaching out on how to reverse this and save our marriage...
meditation and presence the key to a more fufilling life
And no woman around you👍
...because when the man is present the woman feels -two magical words- important and safe!
Lidiya Homa The words I like to use are , Safe and Valued. So yes and yes
yes when she is safe, she cheats on him. Thats life.
@@anastasiosmoulios2955 yup. When she feels totally validated and knows that she's got you 100%, she'll want adventure and excitement. Most women are to neurotic to be satisfied without drama
Fuck that noise!! ...
Tis true.
Yes Tony, I couldn't agree more. Presence is King, and the way to being treated like a King! Bravo for sharing, men need to hear this, and even more so practice developing their strength of presence!
Your right..100% concentrate on the conversation not checking their phone and fb pages it feels like I'm boring....
I was being 100% present, but my date was checking her phone and even trying to watch shows when we were together. All she cares is the next episode, how great the leading guy is, why I'm not as good as him...
Glad I ran away before my wallet got ripped off.
I absolutely adore this man. He is on the top of my real men.list. Real men are rare in this world. Love making doesn't start in the sac, it's 90% of the relationship, sex is the 10% which is the bonus of the relationship.
I couldn't agree with you most
Yes i agree
Lol, your delusional and stupid , and I’m guessing your also single , right??
I thought my wife was dominant when I just realised I was so unstable and unreliable to she had to set up boundaries and safe nets for her own mental health, these boundaries did not make me feel OK. When I grounded in my self, realised my triggers and boundaries. I told her strait up what I don't like, She let go, became more submissive and it was up to me to save the relationship. That was the key, but if you do this as a man you HAVE to keep ur promisees because ur basically telling ur girlfriend to lower her guard and open up to vulnerabilities.
Brilliant!
I agree that presence is important. What I've found in my relationship is that its all about the energy you give off. And the energy you give off all comes down to your thoughts. When I meditate on thoughts of certainty, self-power and caring prior to engaging with my wife, then my wife reads it as 'present', even if those thoughts aren't specifically about my wife (ex. I could be thinking about a time I cared for a sick family member). For some men, this isn't an important distinction but it was critical for me. If I just listened to my wife talk and honestly tried to understand she would read my confusion and effort in a wildly negative way.
You are absolutely 100% correct and articulated this in a way I've personally been unable to convey to my boyfriend for over a year now. I will be sending him this video!! Thank you so much for this wisdom and enlightenment. It has helped me identity that need that I've struggled with for years but felt I'm just too needy or insecure. I didnt realize this is a need among most or any other women! I hadn't identified this but now see it as a missing piece to my puzzle or shall I say trail of unsuccessful relationships. I believe its actually vital to my long term success in a relationship, and the key to my serenity and happiness .
Very lucky I have lived with my partner 16 years.
I love him more every day, we met only as teens.
So true,, my partner said if there is a problem we fix it.
And if something is not write we Allways say it's the situation and we try to resolve we love each other more than what we want for ourselves we choose to do it together and compromise we feel like we teach each other something everyday and bring the best out of each other and pray for each other everyday
Thanks Tony. Your videos showed me that I was absolutely never present(it never crossed my mind, always in my own head) and now I am living a much happier life.
It is so true ,In my experience when 1-I encountered a serious problem in relationship and didnt hope for a solution
2- I thought "I dont have the right to ask her for a lot of changes to my desire.
3- or when I told her several times about an issue and she didnt care)or 4-when I felt "I dont want the relationship anymore "and dont dare to say that .
I gradually decreased my presence mostly unconsciously to 0.
Now I know the most important part is going for the problems and solve not to escape from them or neglect them.
alireza saatchi s I'd still ask you after 5 years of comment what do you think on number 2 is a selfie thing to do to ask of your partner or is a define thing to do not trying to save a relationship? There obviously there a balance to it like all thing, what I learn is not all problem need to be fix like John Gotten said 69% of the couple issue problem will never goes away. But you still openly realize and accept what part of you and how far is your expectation is unrealistic or is something you both can improve on or is just what is and nothing wrong with it. That a hard one for me
Me thinking back what is the best outcome/pleasant result & feeling for both of you if you don't say it as much but still have lots of positive reinforcement there not need to push on anything. But if the effort is shown anyway is good enough to for what it is. Or if both of you can make the relation way more pleasant with a little more effort and make a relation stay together then is more than worth it.
You are 100% on point with this message. My husband tells me since his always home his present and i keep telling him that's not being with me if you just in the house. I might of well be single and have a doll if you call this being present. thanks for this message i will share it with him.
Why not do something with your husband that he also enjoys. Perhaps if you initiate fixing the problem you might get him to respond. If he enjoys gaming, exercising, watching series etc you can join him and be present in those moments with him. I'm pretty sure he will be pleasantly surprised and be more present with you
@@rustyspygoat4089 I'm the everyday planner nothing floats his boat.
@@samantharg4380 suck harder, tends to work!
I'm a woman watching this, and I absolutely agree with you Tony. Presence or connection is the key to make a relationship works.
And money to make relationships to starts😨
Absolutely! Tony, you are right on the mark! I left my last relationship because of presence. Presence means deep listening as well--really trying to empathize and understand your honey's POV.
I love u baby
I dunno if you are going to read or reply to this, but I'm gonna try a question.
Did your ex try to be present after you've decided to leave the relationship? If he would've prooved to be more present than ever for you, would you have returned to the relationship?
My wife decided to leave me exactly because of my lack of presence, which I fully understand now in retrospect and I am trying hard to save our marriage...
What if you became boring and neglected your man and hence why he was not 'present' for you? Perhaps you were the one who initiated the break down in communication, instead of assuming it was the guys fault.
Bet it was money
Did you want him to understand with your POV or necessarily agree with it? One is presence, the other is submission.
So this whole time I've been ignorant and ignoring the fact that yes I haven't been present, and somehow led me to believe she's just nagging all the time! 😑 my dear friend this helped me a whole lot but mostly for my one and only. Thank you Tony ! 👍🏼
Same
100% agree! I was trying to figure out why sometimes I go off men and get angry when I am getting to know them when I was all in love mode not long before. It's exactly this because presence = value instead of meaningless words. Presence is decisiveness, it's the act of leadership. Not somebody who dosen't have a plan or know what they want it's I am here I am you man I choose you and right now in this moment it's just me and you and I demonstrate to you via.. this (act of service etc). That one act of service can excite a woman for days, but I too often come across men who are like all on fire one day and the next cold as ice for no reason other than their insecurites and fear kick in and they think they should back off and yet that is the very act that will cause their fear to come to pass. I.e me stepping out with somebody else who actually wants me there.
Yep...stop staring at the TV....watching movies on your iPad...or chatting on facebook...when your are with me in my company i would appreciate your absolute and total attention...Thank you Tony well said...
My 6 month old daughter taught me the most valuable thing ... how to be present to the moment “
This one expresses so much of what I've been feeling the whole time but didn't find the words for. Great video.
Presence=true! I lived with 22 years with a man who was not present.....didn't care to be there for me. I now have a real man--a real husband, who loves me and is continually present. It melts me.
Linda Rodriguez Pitzen what presence mean?
My wife wants to leave me now being exhausted with my absence and that I've basically ignored her in key moments. I deeply understand this now, along with the pain and am trying hard to win her back and save our marriage by being helpful, more engaged and present, watch videos and content for ideas and inspiration, reaching out.
If it were you, roughly in this sort of situation and he would do what I'm doing, would you have continued your relationship with him? If he would have changed?
Yeah yeah yeah ofcoz men are always to blame.
@@ChrisKsan
Let her fkn go. I promiss you she doesnt even know what she want in her life, she think she know it but non of them they do . They are full of headache
Best advice money can buy right here and most of you will let this fly right over your head and not realize the centuries of wisdom that’s being packed in this short 6 min clip ... if you don’t understand this and don’t watch this over and over until you do then you deserve what’s comming to you .
So true. Even the attempt to be present is awesome because it replicates the next time and gets easier. Presence is key to connection. 💓 it is difficult to find someone REAL and speaks his truth! Stand up for yourself and let's work together!
I already lost the girl i love a week ago and i know why, tony you are a king!
Did you get her back?
Honesty like they taught us as a child is the best virtue !! 😊
Honesty & presence is key. Focus on the now with me.
The way i amd starting to think of it is.... You have to love yourself first before you can love others.
Love thy neighbour as you love thy self. A poor man in love can't help others when he is filled with resentment, frustration, hate and lack of compassion. If you are not in happy place how can you bring happiness to a relationship. What makes you happy first then when your happy your outward appearance, words and actions will attract happiness from others and those closest to you.
WeddingDJBusiness complete bs. Sticking together in good and bad moments + attraction equals relationship.
YUP absolutely correct. Presence does not take a lot of time. You just really look into her eyes. Women want to be "seen". This is truth
I heart this man! He knows what he’s talking about.
I have never heard a man say it better. You fully understand.
This video could not have come at a better time... my wife and I have been discussing this very topic lately and this video totally drives the point home. I am committed to being PRESENT! Thanks Tony.
Yes! It's so true! Be present. Even if he feeling 100%, show up and be supportive.
I'd rather have honesty and possible hurt feelings briefly, than a lie that builds into resentment later. On either or both sides.
It's a team effort for both people to commit to the team.
Tony, you are 1000% right. The biggest thing that has mattered to me is for my men to have a listening ear.
ABSOLUTELY! thank you for verbalizing it
i lost my husband 11 years ago who had such presence it was an aphrodisiac. He had the special gift that in his presence he made you feel that there is only you in this world. Tony is right. And of course, our sex life was out of this world as a result, he took me from ecstasy to ecstasy. We were married 19 years and he never lost his interest toward me, and our sex life never got dull or passionless even with him having diabetes. He could just look at me and my knees weakened and buckled. He definitely knew how to focus his intention, to show always that he cared and loved me. I always said to him I wish all women could know this kind of love, the world would be in peace, and he should give a class to teach man the art of being loving and passionate, strong. caring, yet vulnerable and cry when it was appropriate to feel sad. He was all of that, a REAL MAN. Healthy, passionate good Sex does not start in the bedroom.
Touché Mr Robbins. Presence from a man is everything!
This so true❤ can be with a man a feel like it's a roommate...no presence 😢
AMEN! Thanks for letting all the men know.
This is so right. A woman will open up her heart and her body... It's such a great feeling to feel he's there. ❤️
You are so so so right! I have been dealing with this for a while. Sometimes I thought that is something wrong with me. But it seems that men also need to change their behavior. I think that both sex need attention and being present is essential.
You are correct, presence is the key to a woman's heart
Hello 👋 Donna X
How are you doing happy New Years
That's so true! Being Present with others….focused on the very moment we are with them!
so Tony is basically saying "give that woman the attention she needs" :-)
I very wise man once told me that women need attention in a relationship, just as much as men need sex in a relationship :-)
A lot of women need sex in a relationship too....Sadly, there's a lot of men who don't understand that and yeah for sure it goes the other way around too....Funny thing is...Women WOULD get all the attention by having sex, haha.
I need sex we all receive love different ways I wish my husband feel the same ways :(
Hailee Wilkinson NOT TRUE! I tried that for years to "get attention" from my husband. Doesn't work. Unless you're in the act itself 24/7 which isn't realistic.
women need sex just as much if not more...lol. or maybe me and my friends just have excellent partners who make us want it
No, not attention. Attention is controlled by the mind.
Presence is anchored in the body.
A man needs to feel himself first, then he can feel a woman.
I am nodding my head so much it hurts. Yes, I agree whole heartedly !!!
What does he mean by having a center?
Robbie Cole get a life purpose.
Robbie Cole check out Corey Wayne on RUclips, he talks alot about that, he saved my relationship
Thanks tony i will try it my girlfriend loves what you do so she is so worth it
Tony, I agree 100%., Presence is the most important thing.
HEY ITS TONY ROBBINS - Jesus Tony, relax, you're at the beach 🌊
"Not by some stupid technique, but by the thing that affects most women the deepest and that is your presence. Most women are starving for a man who's present.... A woman's brain has something called diffused awareness... they take in everything all at once. It's not multitasking. It's experiencing multiple conversations and people whereas men tend to focus on one thing at a time." - Tony
AMEN!!
I agree. He is spot on!! Be present with her is key!!
Yup you can say that again 👏🏽tony
Awesome massage Tony!! Youngsters with cell phone in their hands need this advice!🙏❤️
Message
Thank You, Thank You, Thank You Sage and Tony! You ROCK!
Hello 👋 Deborah Lee Douglas
How are you doing happy New Years
THANK YOU, Tony, this is so true. It's great to hear a man express this so clearly. I've longed for this with every man I've had a relationship with, including platonic relationships with men, and the men in my family. If only they would teach this to boys in school.
Dear FB, loving, respectful,warm & intimate relationships are thought at home. Many people just have no idea how to behave or what is an appropriate conduct as they never saw it in their own homes.
If child was ignored when growing up, never talked to as somebody who matters, never properly acknowledged then that is their normal & that is how they behave towards their own children & spouses. They are clueless as to how to connect properly and in a meaningful way. Result is that many people are hurt by this & cycle of destruction & neglect continues.
Absolutely correct
I'm a woman and I completely a thousand percent agree .. this man is so intelligent on being human
Every word spoke truth not because I'm woman, it goes both ways! Thank you & very grateful for video!
He’s right
You've got it spot on ...! I'm a woman and having a man to be there , present and totally focused on me as I share something . X
Damn Tony, you the man, this had an effect possibly greater than you intended, as I started bring present, my relationship with everyone was enhanced, not just the intimate ones, truly ecstatic experience. Keep doing you👊💪
Thank you Mr Robbins. I can't tell you how much I needed to be validated today! You are much appreciated. Thank you.
He did not lie … 🙌🏾
Great video Tony :) Thanks and God bless
Just shut down the volume and put the video at 2x speed to appreciate and see how effective Tony's body language is. Great video.
Meditation can help with this, Tony you're the truth man... Appreciate it
I am a big fan of Tony so it makes me happy to see that he is now including some "Red Pill" truth in his teachings. If you look up manosphere or red pill you'll find blogs and groups devoted to these effective, relationship strategies.
right on. really, the way it is meant to be.
100% TRUE!
thanks Tony this is what we needed to hear both woman and men
Yes !!!
Good words
1000% nothing is more sexy than to feel, be, and consistently present with him. It seriously melts me he is protective, responsible, for us.
He made some good points to be fair, Ya Gotta love Tony. 💪🤟👍
Yep! Presence and yes to the honesty...presence and passion...mmm!!!
Where’s the link to the video TR is referring to that we should watch?
I am not in a relationship and don't want to be now... but even now I know that I need to work on such thing... I am present only when I am doing my stuff - art.. when I am out with friends or family or in work I am completely not present and I am just thinking about the art and how I can improve in it... That is good and bad at the same time :D
I would say to the wife: " I don't want to wash the dishes, BUT I'll do it because I l LOVE you and that is more important!" As a wife, with that answer, I would've simply run to his arms and LOVE him even MORE !!
Thank you for this video. I just had this same conversation with my significant other
It’s the “wherever this is going” moment where I felt truly connected to him 🤣
Tony, you are living proof a man can be just what a woman 'wants' ..step it up fellas!
Alison Armstrong speaks of this in detail.
There is profoundly deeper meaning to the word “presence” as described by Eckhart Tolle. The way Tony use it is good, but it is much deeper than this.
I learn to late... But im still on time!
Love language of quality time
I love what he said about women not wanting a pleaser. That is so true. We want to be pleased but have a hard time respecting a pleaser in the long run.
What does he mean by having a centre?
Great vid. Spot on perspective, and so succinctly said. I think women have been trying to saying this for eons, but I think we took too long to explain it, and lost our male listener in the process 🤣🤣🤣
And Thankyou, I finally understand why I repel pleasers. I’d never thought of it like tat before!! Crazy :)
that is one good ass microphone my ears are thankful to not be destroyed XD
“Be present with me”
Yes, I agree!
Do what you say....say what you mean....pretty simple!
So true! ❤🙌✨👏😃
BOOM, love this
Well resumed
Presence and honesty
Woman detected so well
And appreciate it
I love tony outlook on what real relationship about consistency and presence nothing's more attractive then I guy who also gets his woman . He is such a awesome person and I admire his atttude about giving and the whole nine yards !'nthank you tony for all your work
Thank you brother
Thank you Tony. I so appreciate this video. I am one that truly wants and welcomes an open, honest line of communication with my husband. However, I basically walk on eggshells. I never know when is a "good" time to talk with him, or when he will get mad. He constantly tells me that he has to listen to and do for others all the time, and apparently I am in the same grouping with all of the others. He angers easily which leads to fighting and my tears. He thinks that lying to me is much easier than just telling the truth. As a result, it is difficult to know what he is thinking or if it is ok to trust what is said. Our level of intimacy is about as low as it can get and I so wish for things to get better with a stronger and close relationship.
i am in the same place as you..... it's not wasy
This kind of guy has some mental issues that need attention. seriously. like borderline personality disorder...or similar
Yes... make me melt. Make me want to surrender 🥰😍💖
Woah Fran woahh
Thank you for this... it’s so true. Now if only HE would see this....
This means TURN OFF THE GODDAMN FOOTBALL GAME. Just listen to her. She doesn't talk to you TO CONVEY DATA. And she DOESN'T want you to FIX ANYTHING. Come on. She just wants you to be PRESENT with her when she's sharing HER FEELINGS.
davidsirmons this exact bullshit is why I’m never getting married lmao
everyone knows that listening to someones problems, a wife for example, or a mother, it is HELL not to be able to do anything about it. Plus you may feel guilty about everything they say. What to do? Just passively listen and think, "they just have to get this out, even tho it sounds like this is all my fault, it is just their perception of life at the moment, and i will just view them as a psychologist would, I am not involved in their life and even tho it sounds like they are accusing me of a million things, i will just say, ' i understand, yes, that must be sad, hard, etc" THIS IS VERY HARD TO DO IF YOU ARE THE KID OR THE HUSBAND they are unloading all this onto.
Fuck that🤣
Women only ask for problem solving when they ask for problem solving. A woman isn't asking for solutions when she's talking with you. Guys, you don't even have to do anything. It's great. Just listen, and that tells her she's not facing it alone.
@@roryhannagan455 legend