My Father Has Passed Away 😔 | First Time My Disapproving Mom Entered Our Home Unexpectedly
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- Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
- Justin's father had lost his battle with cancer, and sadly passed away. Conflict ensues between Justin and his mother regarding funeral arrangements, which led to her showing up at his home unexpectedly, while Sarah and the kids are sick with the flu. Tune in to find out the details.
Thank you all so much for your kind wishes, caring thoughts, prayers, and continued support 🙏 It means a lot to our family, and we truly appreciate every single one of you, especially our Love Withstanding families! We love you!! ❤️❤️❤️
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” - Psalm 34:18
So sorry for your loss
So so very sorry for Your loss Justin. Praying for You and Family.
~ Beautiful ~
Amen 🌼
Beautiful
All of the abuse from the parents all of those years and then expecting you (the abused) to pay for your Father's funeral is outrageous. You are a good human, Justin, and a great son. God bless you during this time. As adult children, we grieve even the most narcissistic of parents. You are a wonderful son. I remember the death of one of my parents who was narcissistic, I took care of them while they were dying and, like you, dutifully took care that they were properly buried. You cannot help how you feel- forgiveness will come. But don't be hard on yourself- I also shed no tears and was shocked by my emotions. Be blessed and at peace. Did I say that you are a good son?
You love your parents regardless. It appears you have no clue about parental love. They are narcissistic parents who cared for their kids who now have careers and their families. So what have you done to make your generation successful, Ms. Know-it-all? Quite frankly, you may be the narcissistic one instead of Justin's parents.
Such a tough position to be in. It’s a cultural expectation that he has to fulfill. Some of these cultural traditions are responsibilities that one is born into. Unfortunately in situations like Justin’s and his family it’s complicated…
Most cultures believe that one can get their blessings in life by fulfilling them and also at moments like this one is expected to put that aside and rise above. Shocking and sounds narcissistic to someone who may not be from a collective cultural background. I feel for them.
Perfectly stated! But I do believe he has forgiven his family, since he continued to try to introduce his beautiful family to his sister and parents. I also believe he understood that there were other issues at play with his parents (on the mental side of things). The mere fact that he can no longer be manipulated by them, shows he is willing to give from his heart and what he deems fair. Shows he is exhibiting some protection measure in place. So I am sending you all the love and support you need. I continue to pray for peace and well being.
im not paying NOTHING. I understand.
You’ve been set up fora good while. It’s forever for you. Once you understand that,you can manage yourself going forward. Been there done that.
Justin I shed a tear for you..not because of your Dad’s passing necessarily, but because of the continued pain you continue to suffer with due to this world’s ignorance. But I’m thankful for the unyielding love that you have for your wife and your kids and within that, I am confident that you will find peace. Sending all of your family prayers for comfort and love during this difficult time.🙏🏾❤️
I’m so surprised that the family is expecting him to pay for the funeral after so many years of treating him badly and also after suddenly changing the plans to a casket burial (much higher cost) with very little notice. I’m so impressed by the kindness shown by this couple towards the family who rejected them and treated them so, so badly. I’m praying for their hearts and healing.
Asians expect the oldest or only son to play a big role when the father dies. It's quite normal in Asian culture and the responsibility usually overrides any past drama or anyone's feelings as the duty comes first. Having said that, his mother sounds really unreasonable and mentally ill tbh.
Honestly there is nothing wrong with not crying. People emotionally respond in different ways. Considering the abuse from your parents it is more than normal to not cry. Forgiveness comes when it comes as the journey of grieving different people differs person to person - so don't force it, just do it when it feels right.
When one of my brother's died, it was several years before I could grieve. Please don't be hard on yourself.There is a time and a place for everything, and each of. us is different. You will eventually heal enough to come to terms with your father and your family.Life is for the living. Love your wife and children. Be a role model for them.Firgive yourself for not having a perfect relationship 😢😢 with your parents and sister.❤❤
You are right. Grieving in itself is inherently different for everyone. I think he is grieving, albeit crying. We are unique in our own selves. There is no right or wrong way.
Justin, I’m glad you finally spoke the truth to your mother. She has been a horrific, unsympathetic person in your adult life and she deserves nothing from you. You are a much better son than she deserves. I hate that she can never apologize to you and Sarah for how horrible she’s been. And just waltzing into your house like that?!? Really unacceptable. My deep sympathy on the loss of your dad.
This is the very best comment. I agree with you 100% ...❤
Couldn't have said it better.
First, I'm sorry for your loss. GOOD FOR YOU to talking back to your mom! I'm Korean, and if it were me, I'd take back my $6K and disappear. It's ok. You don't owe her anything. Doesn't mean you hate her or anything like that. Doesn't mean you're a bad son, either. You were NEVER a bad son. Remember that! It means protecting yourself and your family from an emotionally volatile person. From one Korean to another, please at least decenter her from your life. There is no guilt to feel because you didn't do anything wrong. No need to be mad about it either, just no longer placate to her. It really does not benefit her, either.
U are correct
My abusive dad passed in May. And I stayed away because my older siblings were also mean..about his care etc.
It is too negative to deal with...and I have peace.
I Totally agree …. I have stayed well away from my toxic family for most of my adult life and have kept my children well away too…. I don’t know what they will do without him… I pray they don’t use Justin…
AmeN, and kudos to you for keeping it 💯 about no longer tolerating the endless Disrespect that his parent has thrown his and the wife and kid's way-especially coming from a fellow Korean, you surely know exactly how toxic that is to his health, and so do the rest of us outside of the culture who've survived and overcome reaL life misuse ourselves, as Narcissism is a Global issue!!! 💥
Forgive, as Jesus died for the forgiveness of our sin ❤️
@@teeew89 Don'T confuse "forgiveness" with Enabling Abuse, and don'T hide behind the Bible to do either!
It takes a real man to step up after all of the heartache, Justin! What a good son!
As an Asian, I am surprised but respect your bravery - to see how this topic was broached in a factual manner. Family makes use of the (adult) children in different ways and justify their decisions and own bad and narcissistic behaviour/abuse by yelling, shouting and shifting blame.
For one person to pay for the expenses is not justified and totally infuriating. You are not an only child. Especially when they ostracised you and your family openly. I am in a mixed marriage and have gone through similar experiences and understand what you feel.
Condolences to you all the same. You are a good and fair person and you will be blessed 🙏🏻 Forgiveness is your call - no one can tell you how to feel and process your grief. You do you and you have been a fantastic human being.
I’m proud of you for finally standing up to your horrible Mother! You and your family deserve better than her treatment. I’m glad to see you shining your spine.
Justin, I'm truly sorry for your loss of your dad. I'm flabbergasted and perplexed by your mom's response to assisting in paying for your dad's funeral/burial. Kudos to you for putting aside the past issues and being a dutiful son and ensuring your dads last wishes were met. You're an exceptional man.
My condolences. Losing a parent is tough no matter how old you are. ❤
My deepest condolences to you and family🙏🙏
Depends on the relationship you and your parent had.When my father died at 88 years old,it affected me so much,he was kind,humble,always positive and was always happy to see his children and grandchildren,and also very cheeky and funny,grief hit me hard! When my 90 year old mother died,yes I was sad,but mostly for her,she was the complete opposite of my dad,she was very cold and didn’t show any emotion towards her children or grandchildren,she was negative,finding fault in everything we did,was never interested in us only herself,so it was completely different. But one thing I did when she was still alive was that I chose to forgive her,not because she apologized but for my own peace of mind,it wasn’t easy but until I understood why she was the way she! She grew up in an abusive family with alcoholic father and had never felt loved,so she couldn’t give what she didn’t have herself.. Much healing to you!
Justin and Sarah, my deepest condolences for your family’s loss 😢. Justin: I couldn’t cry for a long time, rather WOULDN’T when my father passed away, as I felt bound by duty as a daughter to my Korean mother to show strength and tend to the necessary “tasks” of burying our father. The tears will come, Justin. Please let them flow when they do, it is vital to healing.
I know it sounds crazy but don’t be in a rush to forgive anyone if you’re not ready. May your dad rest in eternal peace, BUT he did some really hurtful things not just to you but your entire family. It takes time to get over things like this. Wishing you all the best ❤
Don’t feel obliged to push yourself into feeling something. This is someone who has been cruel to you. It’s okay to feel nothing too. There’s no right or wrong way to feel Justin
Your dad was the only one who tried so hard. The stress for him to navigate your mum and sister was too much, he was heartbroken unable to see his grandchildren. Sorry for your loss but he’s finally at peace
"Tried so hard" when? Where? To do what? Maybe you missed the part where Justin says that his father refused to come to Justin's wedding, said terrible things about Justin's wife, and was not present in the lives of his grandchildren for 4 years? It was only THIS year, when Justin's SON was born did Justin's father FINALLY come to see his grandson, and granddaughters.
@@nymeria7239 Exactly!
Toxic ppl stain others..
@@nymeria7239Seriously, the ignoring the obvious Elephant 🐘 in the room just to make excuses and overextend grace to an abusive person in the guise of hiding behind culture is both nauseating and dishonest, at best!!! 🔥
@@nymeria7239💯
The pain your dad has caused you is immense and real. He has hurt you and your family and I think most people wouldn't have intense emotions about losing a father that has caused you so much unresolved pain up until his death. You however have made yourself in to a stand up man and have forever changed your bloodline. You have children who will understand the unconditional love of a father which you were not shown. You have a lot to be proud of and I hope you know how incredible it is that you have been able to overcome the pain your parents have caused you and create a strong loving family. Your grief may be the grief that your father is no longer here to change and make amends and that's a hard thing to grieve but knowing that you never gave up is a remarkable accomplishment to stand on.
I believe his dad suffered much because of their separation. He's gone now. Justin forgive him and focus on the good times. Remember , there is evil in every one of us
I saw him begin to write letters and he was talking to his son
He was very restricted because of others.
Your mom is very wounded. I pray for you.
Please please be careful 🙏
Really ? I saw them a decade ago I thought the mom was against them but the dad was supportive??
Oh wow just heard the end of the video. I'm flabbergasted 😳😢
I’m so sorry Justin about the death of your father. I have been following your videos for years. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
You are such an amazing person. Even when your dad knew he didn’t have long left he still didn’t make peace with you and apologise. Yet you still honour him in his passing ❤️
I'm sorry for your loss. There's no rush to forgive your dad. Forgive him when you're ready. The pain is deep. It takes time to heal and come to terms with everything. It took me 11 years after my mom's death before I forgave her.
Oh No! After listening further Please don’t let your mother guilt you into into paying for the funeral! Your mother is a CLASS ACT OMG😢
I buried my mom October 21, 2023. It's a process that still feels like a outer body experience. I didn't grieve while planning the funeral to much to think about, and too many opionions and feelings to deal with. My mom was my best friend and til this day she is all I think about. You will get through this. Prayer to you and your family.
We love you.
The Most High will always be with you, mswilson. Continue to lean on Him.
I was an emotionally paralyzed Zombi going thru my husbands early death 11 years ago. I cried during his illness & care but atI didn’t cry. I’m still affected by the loss of this
I’m sorry for your loss. It’s ok to grieve, everything is surreal right now, but believe me, it will hit you at some point and just let it out, it will help with the healing. Know that Jesus is very near. I know you’re struggling forgiving your dad but ask Jesus to help you to forgive him and he will. Jesus has forgiven us much, therefore we offer that same forgiveness to others. I will lift your family up in prayer.🙏🏾
@@kayyep5736 Love you also. Thank you!
We are so sorry for your loss. So glad you were able to get a some closure with your father. Yes, your mom is a piece of work. Many parents are difficult. They can't seem to relinquish control. You have been an honorable and generous son. Siblings can be a struggle.
I had never seen your channel, I stumbled into this vid and listened to every word. My mother passed over 7 years ago, I have never properly cried. Her arrangements were most definitely like buying a refrigerator, I will never forget your analogy. I do not feel any guilt whatsoever. I loved her, I respected her, but at a distance. And that's okay. Please do not feel guilty over being desensitized. It is justified. ~Blessings
The refrigerator analogy is spot on. I was there when my father passed. Planned the whole funeral, organized and took care of Mom's finances. He passed 6 years ago on December 8th and I still haven't cried for him. I talk to him though and tell him all the reasons I'm still mad at him.
🎯
What you are doing is natural. My uncle owns a funeral home, in summers I would work there to help out with things. There is always that family member that is not very emotional but the strong one that makes the decisions, and that is seems to be you. So don't think you are wrong in that, you are not. It is your way of processing. Work on that forgiveness and take it one day at a time. A death in a family can bring them together but can also tear some apart. I always thought it was amazing how different people react and how people can show their true colors about things line finances and things like that. I agree the burden of cost should not have all been on you. Hang in their Justin and Sarah.
Justin, all I can say is you are a good man, with a kind soul. Don't worry too much about not crying (everyone grieves in different ways), and it is not proof or a show to other people about how much you loved for your father. If there's anything to be grateful for, be thankful that your father is no longer in pain. Pay your last respects to your father but don't immortalize or idolize him into someone that he wasn't. Live your truth and reality, and take care of you, Sarah, your children, and all those who respect and deserve access to your life. Many blessings and peace to you.
I’m sorry for your loss Justin. Everyone grieves differently. Whether that’s burying yourself in work or bawling hysterically. Your grief is your own and you shouldn’t feel obligated to grieve any specific way. Sending love to you and your family! ❤
This is a very well said comment!
Thank you for this caring comment 💕
I'm so sorry, Justin. This is a significant loss, and feeling numb and detached is normal and self protective. The feelings may eventually come in waves that you can tolerate over time. Everyone grieves differently, and there are no rules.
Maybe some supportive therapy would help you sort out your feelings about your family's behavior over the last ten years. Forgiveness (if ever) is a process. An objective, trained person could help you
a lot.
Sending good wishes and hope,
A retired therapist.
Long time subscriber here. Justin, everybody grieves differently. THERE IS NO WRONG WAY TO GREIVE. Don't feel guilty for not crying. Regardless of how your father treated you, you were always there when they needed you, even after his passing. Your a great person, you and Sarah both. I Love you guys and your family
142K subscribers and 142K views : This means every subscriber has seen this heartfelt video and are supporting you 100%. Your parents broke the parent-child contract when they decided to pick their ego over their child's happiness. You can't shed any tears because your body senses this and can't fake it. You owe them nothing. You are being very fair and caring for helping with the funeral arrangement and that is not because you owe them anything, you are doing it because you have a heart and are a caring person. My deepest condolences goes to you. Please take good care of yourself. You have been a fantastic son to parents who did not deserve it. You have your wife and kids to look after and they will love you till eternity and that is all you need
Justin what a wonderfully kind & forgiving man you are. Not everyone cries when "expected". Please don't dwell on that. Someday when you least expect it some thing might trigger you & your eyes tear up. We can all see the pain in your eyes & hear it in your voice. Wasn't it a good thing that everyone did get together & make some kind of peace before he passed? Do not let your mom & sister try to lay the guilt trip on you & your beautiful family. I am older than your parents(probably) & I have lived it. What a gem Sarah is! How lucky you both were in finding each other! Stay strong & don't beat yourself up worrying about how you should or shouldn't be feeling. I hope I didn't sound too preachy. Soon it will be 20 years that my mom passed. My dad is gone too.
We're so sorry to hear of your father's passing Justin, many of us know this pain. Praying your strength during this life-transition. Be good to yourself...
My mom passed away 6 months ago…my anchor is gone and I didnt fall apart like I thought I would or should. Your dad raised a warrior. He and your mom are proud of how you are taking care of arrangements and your family. Sending my condolences, and much respect.
Do not rush to forgive him. Heal YOUR hurt first. His forgiveness will come AFTER that. Sending you love.
It took almost a year for me to cry for my ex husband’s death. The mistreatment and alienation froze the grief inside of me, and nothing was resolved before he passed. You are doing what is right. Your heart can have peace. The grief and forgiveness may come later. ❤
I am Lydia from London, and I am sorry to hear about your father. Don't worry about crying now, but maybe on the day of the funeral. Please talk about the more positive and good things about him and remember it is for your peace of mind. May God bless your efforts and bless your family. ❤
I am so sorry for your loss. I am happy for you that he was able to see your children and make peace.💔❤️🙏🏾
My condolences to the Park family. Justin,this is the end of an era, the closing of a chapter, the beginning of life after your Dad's physical departure.
The way you chose to move on from this will be important for the well-being of all concerned. While others are sharing the experience with you, you alone know how and what you are feeling inside. So whatever you do, try not to be too hard on yourself. This has been a tough journey so remember to give youself the time, space and permission to make sense of what is unfolding.
May you find comfort from all available sources.
It’s a blessing that your father had the opportunity to know his grandchildren before his death.
Justin, the fact that you were raised by these people and turned out the way you did, is extremely commendable. You are a warrior and you should be so proud of who you are and the beautiful family that you and your wife created. You deserve all of the good things in life. Your feelings are 100% valid.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Funerals are so ridiculously expensive. I can’t believe your mother had the audacity to expect you to pay for the entire funeral after how they have treated you and your family! And you have small kids to take care of. I agree, you eventually need to let go of the anger but right now the emotions are too raw. It’s ok not to cry but don’t be surprised if it hits you randomly later on down the line. You are angry at both your parents and that is completely understandable. I heard this quote, “Anger is like holding a hot coal in your hand with the intent of throwing it at someone else. But you are the one who ends up burned.”
Honey the tears will come, feel your feelings no matter what they are. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Justin. It's hard when a parent passes. Harder when there are unresolved issues. Although there were things you wish you could have resolved with your father, you may one day look back and feel some solace in knowing he at least met your family. And while this is incredibly sad news, I hope your sister and your mother can become closer to the family you and Sarah are building.
The mom and sister need to acknowledge the hurt and pain they cause.. They don’t get a free pass to put stuff under the rug and waltz in. Forgiveness follows atonement and evidence of change.
I’m so sorry to hear this. My mother passed away this summer and it’s so surreal to navigate this world without their bodies in it. Sending grace and love to you and your family.
What kind of son are you? The best kind. You honored your father and mother and sister. There is a great blessing in store for you. Praying for you as you grieve. The tears will flow, let them. Grief comes in waves💔💜🙏🏾
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. There are many lessons that can be learned from this experience. The generational curses can end with you. Thank you for seeing the harm in your dad’s actions and hate towards your wife and choosing to let it end with you. You did the honorable thing contributing to his viewing and funeral. That shows great integrity. Never stop having pure love in your heart. Your children and wife are so blessed to have you in their lives. God bless you all. ❤
My condolences for the loss of your father, Justin. I do pray that you are able to find that forgiveness and not have to carry around resentment, regret, hurt, and disappointment. He's no longer here, so only you can relieve yourself of these feelings by finding acceptance and forgiveness. It's hard to get past those negative emotions, but remember you are doing it for yourself, your wife, and your children. Peace be with you.
My deepest condolences to you, Justin, and your family. There are no rules to how someone grieves. Know that God loves and hold us near during difficult times. 🙏🏾
In October, I lost my husband of 42 years. He had cancer. He had a heartattache sitting in his favorite chair in front of me. Our 3 adult children who live at home emotionally broke down. Here we are at Christmas and what with all the things that are required to do following his death I have yet to grieve. I was unable to retain any information that the funeral hall ,the filling out of government forms, etcetera. My daughter was my rock and still is. She took control and really helped me through it all. Today is December 23, and I'm still in disbelief that my husband will not be in our kitchen on Christmas day, making his famous turkey dinner. My children have stepped up and are going to try to recreate said dinner. I'm waiting for reality to catch up. I have not completely let the grief in. When my father died in 2000, I didn't immediately grieve either. I took almost 2 yrs before I broke down. For a week, I was a mess. Staying in bed crying . Grief is so different for each person. Do not feel guilty about how you and your mind react to the passing of your father. And especially don't feel guilty of the sense of relief you may also feel. I understand all about the battle between grief and relief. Hugs to you and yours❤😊
My sympathy to you and your family. There’s one thing I can say for your dad. He seemed to recognize his errors and tried to make it right in the later years. As for your mom, she’s a piece of work and influenced his actions. She is toxic and your sister was no better. I remember when she wouldn’t even come out of her room when you would visit. You are a kind hearted soul. I’m sure you would not disconnect yourself from them because they need you, but that’s probably what is needed. So sad that your mom manages your sister’s finances at her age. You and your family will be blessed in a mighty way. You will cry in due time. Planning a funeral is all about business, non-stop, for a few days. That’s completely normal. ❤
I felt the same way about your dad when I heard of his past but then I saw his changed behavior. Maybe he couldn't say the words but he showed you in his actions.
It seems like your mom and sister have come a long way in accepting your family. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive them too and help them through this. I'm sure they will be very lost without your dad
I’m so sorry about your fathers passing. I’ve been following your story for years and this is such a sad conclusion I really wish you could’ve been closer with him at the time of his passing because you’ve made it clear that’s what you truly want for u and your children. Hopefully your mom will come around more.
I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss ❤
I’m so very sorry Justin. Your family is most definitely in my thoughts and prayers. ❤
I'm sorry for everything your dad put you through. Forgive him for your own healing but please remember it is a process and don't be too hard on yourself, it will happen gradually. You are strong because you managed to create your own family in spite of everything that was going on and this is what will help you during this challenging period.
Condolences, Justin. Everyone grieves differently. God bless your father's soul, may he rest in love and peace 🕊️
I'm so sorry about your Dad's passing 🙏🏽 Sending my prayers & condolences to you & your family 🙏🏽 🙏🏽
Very sad to hear you lost your daddy Justin.May his soul rest in peace.Sending prayers and condolences to your family.
Everyone grieves differently and as a son you are staying strong to take care of the business side of arranging your father’s funeral. My condolences for the passing of your father and may he rest in peace. 🙏
My heart is broken to hear of your father passing away. May your family have strength through this terrible time.
My heart is broken for you, praying for your family, Justin!❤❤❤❤❤
I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad's passing. Deaths can bring suppressed feelings to the surface. You are a good son. You and your wife are good, forgiving people. You deserve the very best.
My deepest condolences Justin to you and your family!
Your mom coming over to your house was awesome. I’m glad she came and in her way said sorry. That she immediately picked up the baby was so sweet! I do hope the relationship continues to improve.
Justin, you & your beautiful family have my deepest condolences for the loss of your Dad! Sending Love your way!❤
I am so sorry Justin. My deepest, heartfelt condolences to you and your family during this difficult time. May the Lord bless and keep you all.
First, I’m so sorry for the loss of your father. Justin, I want to thank you and Sarah for sharing your family struggles around (re)establishing connection to your family. Through your honesty and disclosure of what you’re thinking and feeling, you are helping others who are going through similar situations. Other commenters said this, but there is no correct way to grieve. Your way is the right way. Family relationships are complicated, and over time your feelings about everything you’ve gone through with your parents will become more clear. I hope you take some comfort in knowing that because of yours and Sarah’s grace, your father had the opportunity to meet and spend time with your children.
I’m so sorry for your loss Justin. My thoughts and prayers are with you, Sarah, and your children. 😔❤️🙏
Justin:
Profound condolences to you and your extended family at this very difficult time - the passing of your father.
Are you and your father more alike than different? The death of a parent, especially of the parent of the same gender, will have you re-evaluating how you define yourself. When you notice how angry or in despair you feel, the re-evaluation has already begun.
Please do not worry about the tears. When it is time, they will come.
Your refrigerator analogy resonates with me. Your focus and analysis allows you to get tasks completed without falling to pieces. I call what you are experiencing "God's bubble of protection". He gives you the strength and focus to carry through. The bubble will pop, but that's okay, too. Everything in its time.
Although forgiving your Dad is difficult, when you do, it will free YOU. Forgiveness means that you allow God to handle the consequences. And, if you are Christian, a gentle reminder that "the Lord's Prayer" (the Our Father) states: "...And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us." Hmmm. Resentment is a dish that is served cold and it is poisonous. Please eat as little of it as possible.
And please know that you are not alone.
May the Lord and good friends/family give you massive comfort during this difficult time.
Beautifully said. You must be a therapist.
Thanks. But no. Just been there, done that. It is so emotionally hard when the people who are supposed to love and protect you do not. And as for Justin, he is a person for whom this saying applies: still waters run deep.
So sorry to hear of your loss Justin!! May the Almighty surround you and your family with peace and clarity durning this difficult time!!! So proud of how you are handling everything!! You are truly a caring and sensitive person!! Thanks for all the support your lovely and caring wife has exemplified as well!!!
So sorry for your loss. People grieve in different ways. Some don’t even realize they are grieving. Forgiving your father is the first step in moving on with your life. Now that your father is gone, your mother may want a closer relationship with her grandchildren. She was probably being abused by your father too and now she is free.
Don't assume that the father was at fault. Mothers always make a way even in the worst of circumstances. If his mother cannot respect her son's family, that is fine. He has a father in heaven who loves him and needs to take care of the family he was blessed to create.
Justin my deepest condolences to you and your family on the loss of your dad.
Your parents and sister are accountable for the damage they caused to you and your family.
Every effort was made by you and your wife to reconcile.
Everyone grieves differently in time you will find solace and peace and hopefully a united family. My prayers are always with you, your wife, children, mom and sister.
My condolences Justin. May The Lord continue to strengthen you and your wife… you both are true examples of good people… despite all the abuse emotionally and verbally… you both found the strength to rise above. God bless you both and your children too 🙏🏽❤️
Sorry Justin for the loss of your father. I do believe he loved you alot. Be strong. 🙏
Oh Justin and Sarah, I'm so sorry to hear of your father's passing. We all grieve differently and it's ok that you haven't cried. It may take time and it may hit you when you least expect it. You may express your pain differently, such as; getting angry at the dumbest stuff, withdraw from things/people you love, become spiteful, start doing extreme activities, etc. Just know those changes can be signs of your loss and it's ok.
Thank you for sharing your story. I’m sorry for your father passing. You are a wonderful person. ❤sending you your wife, and children love.
I am so sorry for the loss of your Father. It was a difficult relationship, but he was a bit easier than your mother. Love to you and your real family, your wife and children. ❤ and prayers.
MY CONDOLENCES TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY AND TO ALL THOSE THAT KNEW AND LOVED HIM
Sorry for your loss Justin! Thinking of you and your family! Do not be so hard on yourself, we all grieve differently and differently long as well. As long as ou focus on expressing what ever feeling or thought you are going through, you are doing what you need too: processing and giving it a place somwehere. Praying for you all! 🙏🏽🕯️
So very sorry for your loss Justin. Praying that you and your family will find peace and healing. Everyone grieves differently. Take as much time as you need. I'm glad your dad was able to meet all his grandkids before he passed.
Justin, you’ve been through a lot. I applaud you for standing your ground and not allowing this experience to make you bitter. You deserve peace and happiness. Hopefully this will be a learning experience for your mother, and this will be a wake up call for her to choose love instead of hate.
Justin, first my condolences, I am sorry for your loss. No matter what the nature of your relationship with your dad you have become a caring husband and responsible father!!! Secondly, I am sooooo proud of you and how you have handled this difficult situation👏🏽 ! Thirdly, you vented to your mom what was on your heart and now it’s out and you can now forgive your mom and sister and move on. Please don’t let the past and your mothers behavior ruin your future. You set boundaries and that is good. I would hate for your mom to argue in front of her grandchildren, not good! I pray the funeral all went well! Love you all❤️!!!
I am so sorry for your loss Justin ❤losing a parent is so hard and I know it’s even more complicated due to the on-off relationship you had with him. Let yourself feel what you need to feel. While things weren’t perfect, you can take some comfort that your kids got to meet him a few times before he passed away. You may cry and you may not, there’s nothing strange about not crying. I’m sorry to hear how your mom reacted when you suggested going halfsies for the funeral costs but I’m also not surprised. This is the period where everyone’s emotions are all over the place and tensions can run high so I would expect a few outbursts from your mom and even from your sister. It’s not really a time where you can expect everyone to act rationally, given everything you’ve been through with your parents. I hope things improve with your mom and sister as you grieve, but be prepared if there are setbacks. It’s ok if there are. Much love to you and Sarah.
My prayers are with you and your family; I'm so sorry for your loss!!
My sincere condolences to you and your family, Justin. People grieve in various ways, and right now, you are making sure that things are being taken care of and you are being there for your family. I am happy that you and your mom were able to make the decisions needed for your dad amicably and that the meeting took place in your home. That's a big improvement in your relationship. Keeping movement forward and continue to be strong. Crying is not a sign of weakness, so if you have, then do it, but if you don't, then grieve in your own way.
My deepest sympathies and condolences go out to you and your family during this most difficult time. 😔💔 Praying that you all find comfort from all those who surround you with love. Sending you huge hugs. ❤️❤️❤️
Justin, grieving is different for everyone - how you do it and how long it lasts. If you cry it's ok. If you don't it's ok. Just make sure that you take time to process what has happened and talk to someone if you seem to be stuck with forgiving and getting past his death. Prayers to you and the family.
I am sorry to hear your dad passed away. He is in peace now and not suffering. I hope you were able to have a conversation with him before he passed even if he may not have been able to respond back. There is no right way or wrong way to deal with loss. You can forgive your dad but it dosen't mean you have to forget his actions. My step brother never cried at his mom's funeral and actually didn't cry his heart out till maybe 5 years later. He did have a good relationship with his mom. Funeral is so expensive, it is ridiculous. I remember taking care of my brothers funeral back in 2005 and the lowest cost coffin (which still looked great) was $5K. I am glad your mom came around and decided in her own way, to say I am sorry and split the cost of the funeral. Your sister, will probably need a lot of healing and I hope she will be okay. I can tell you still carry hurt and anger from your dad's action. Heal in your own time, and when that day comes. You will know it and a weight will be lifted. I am glad your dad got to meet all his grandkids even though it was many years later. Love and Hugs to you and your family. ❤🫂🙏
I'm so sorry for your loss, Justin. Take your time to grieve.❤
I'm so sorry for your loss Justin. My condolences to you and your family. Know that you have shown tremendous love, respect and strength to your parents while also honoring your wife and children. As you grieve in your own way, I wish you peace and comfort. May God always be with you and your family.
My condolences everyone grieves differently. It’s ok!
Sending loving prayers to you Justin. Family relationships can be hard. I do not know how your father perceived you as his son, whether he was proud or sometimes disappointed. Now that he has crossed over, We know he can see everything clearly. He must be so proud of you Justin and his love for you is infinite. He’s smiling down on you, his baby boy❤️
When you go to the funeral, take a candle back to your home and burn it for your babies to bring them peace.
Justin, I am so sorry for you families loss. Hang in there, and cherish the love and family you have.
I’m so sorry for your loss Justin, you and your family are in my prayers..my condolences to you all , may your dad rest in peace🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽😇😇
That's your decision. Don't be pressured. Don't you worry if they complain later. Ungrateful people will always complain. Cheering for you.
even though he was against you and your wifes relationship, for you he tried to change as slowly as that change was.grieve well Justin
Very sorry for the loss of your Dad, may God strengthen you in this moment.
My condolences, Justin! I pray that losing your father will bring you, your family, sister,and mother closer. Life is short. Sometimes in life, we get so lost in our own emotions (talking about mom and sis) that we forget that our days are numbered. Thank God your father at least met your wife and children. I hope your sister's mental health doesn't decline. There's nothing that she could've done to save your father. But she can work on having a better, healthier relationship with you. God forbid something happens o your mom, she'll be(feel) alone. Let's be grateful for the living and respect the ones who passed. 🙏🏾 stay strong. You've made a beautiful life for yourself despite all that you've been through. I wish you, your family, mother, and sister all peaceful hearts. 🤍
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m glad your dad got to meet your wife and kids.
I'm so sorry to hear of your father's passing. I'm praying for you all.😢
My God! I haven't been on RUclips for a few weeks and I'm always thinking of you and your family. Please give yourself time to grieve, not just your dad but all the emotions of WHAT IF. Totally normal. But you take the time for you. This so so unbelievably hard.