INFJ, Why A BORING Relationship Is The Secret To An EXCITING Life

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  • Опубликовано: 11 янв 2025

Комментарии • 96

  • @Wenzes
    @Wenzes  3 месяца назад +13

    🔥 Want an exciting life without the chaos? Let me know in the comments: Do you believe a ‘boring’ relationship can actually lead to a more fulfilling life? 🤔 Share your thoughts below and let’s dive deep into this together! Don’t forget, if you’re ready to take your INFJ life to the next level, check out the details for the INFJ Epic Life Bootcamp launching October 26th. 💡 #INFJLife #ExcitingLife #BoringIsTheNewExciting

    • @Sarabasim2002
      @Sarabasim2002 3 месяца назад +4

      Can you make videos about the signs of us INFJ reaching the best healthy version of us and how to recognize that we are in the right path in life ?

    • @braxtonmills1235
      @braxtonmills1235 3 месяца назад

      INFJ INFJ INFJ

    • @QueenOfTranscarpathia
      @QueenOfTranscarpathia 3 месяца назад +2

      Amen. Married 27 years to a strong quiet tall intellectual man. Brings me coffee every day. My best friend, my other half

  • @Jaynycreates
    @Jaynycreates 3 месяца назад +104

    I think INFJ's need to stop entering a room and tuning in to others. Just stop or at least limit the times when you do it. It holds you back. Instead, enter the room and just allow yourself to shine. You have so much to offer. Just don't give it away to others so much. Decide ahead of time how much energy you are willing to share. Sincerely, an INFJ

    • @shawn4093
      @shawn4093 3 месяца назад +9

      I needed that, thanks

    • @Elelee-sg2gs
      @Elelee-sg2gs 3 месяца назад +2

      how true

    • @tinovillalovas
      @tinovillalovas 3 месяца назад +1

      So what you’re saying is we should be authentic like an INFP… 😬😅😹

    • @Jaynycreates
      @Jaynycreates 3 месяца назад +4

      @@tinovillalovas I'm not saying INFJ is inauthentic at all. We become very conscious of everyone us to the point where we can overlook ourselves. We deserve some of our own attention too. So what I am saying is, be a little more selfish with it. Yes it feels good to tune in, understand and help others but WE need US too. I know its not really possible to stop doing this....but we can check ourselves and see that what we do to others can actually work on us too. We only have so much energy so try to use it wisely. Im really working on this and when i tune out from others i get a lot more done over here and pretty fast too.

    • @theADHDinfj
      @theADHDinfj 3 месяца назад +2

      For me, it’s exactly that. Once I stopped overthinking or “tuning in” I started thriving!

  • @leilanoorani2976
    @leilanoorani2976 3 месяца назад +34

    You are wise beyond your years Wenzes! Absolutely agree, but would never think to say it quite like this. No to drama. No to fixing/rescuing. Yes, to supportive, stable, mutually respectful relationships, aka “boring”.

  • @adelegalaxi7895
    @adelegalaxi7895 3 месяца назад +9

    Absolutely spot on! I've been in this boring, but safe, secure and loving relationship for almost 23 years. Although, it took me a long time to understand it. We have our hobbies and interests that excite us on our own, but we also have a lot in common that unites us.

  • @kristinehurst8348
    @kristinehurst8348 3 месяца назад +5

    Exactly … married fifty years and we get each other .. we choose to be boring but also adventurous .. our kids and grandkids see our boring life 😊and our excitement … we have a great life even with life’s tragic moments and scary moments 😮

  • @saracarrollyoutube
    @saracarrollyoutube 3 месяца назад +42

    I have a boring wonderful relationship finally!!! My husband is my home and safe place. My daughter says we're boring and not connecting since he and I can sit on the couch, play on our phones next to eachother and not really do anything for hours 😊...perfection!!! We are just ourselves..introverts 😂

    • @Wenzes
      @Wenzes  3 месяца назад +11

      ❤️❤️❤️

  • @Arwndr
    @Arwndr 2 месяца назад +3

    Lets call things as they really are....
    Stable deep close relationship - that is exciting relationships.
    Drama, co-dependence, emotional wawes - that is not excitement, thar is a Toxic relationships.

  • @maxnewton686
    @maxnewton686 3 месяца назад +15

    This is an example of Wenzes at her best - answering codependency, reclaiming autonomy and agency, and how this changed her life for the better and how it can change ours too. Please keep making more videos like this Wenzes! Thank you so much!

    • @KathyJacksonSanDiegoRealEstate
      @KathyJacksonSanDiegoRealEstate 3 месяца назад +1

      Very good video. She knows how to teach. Co dependency can cause lots of unwise decisions.

    • @iamnoteric
      @iamnoteric 2 месяца назад +1

      i know for a fact that she lives the way she preaches because she can just spontaneously talk and talk and talk. plus, infjs are bs detectors :)

  • @yh3428
    @yh3428 3 месяца назад +15

    One of the best things in life is to listen to Wenzes when feeling blue. No one really understands us and the magnitude we are going through. That's why we need to find the right people to help us infj

  • @lindamcgillin2263
    @lindamcgillin2263 2 месяца назад +4

    This is so accurate. I’m in a 33 happily married relationship. It gives me the time to pursue my novel and screenplay and creating my world changing empire. Yes, I always want “excitement”…. Yes, I see an INFJ friend choosing a toxic relationship because she thinks it is “exciting”…..

  • @lizv3634
    @lizv3634 3 месяца назад +15

    Amen!!!! I’ve just been figuring this out in my life. I’m finally happy about my life without a relationship. I’m wary of adding someone. I’m just going to focus on building and if someone comes along who is easy to be with and makes my life better, I’ll consider them. I don’t want to get sidetracked! Thank you for the encouragement.

  • @the_alizerah
    @the_alizerah 3 месяца назад +10

    "Relationships can be our biggest hurdle in life" so reall rn

  • @mycapitain843
    @mycapitain843 2 месяца назад +2

    Let’s continue to stick together for each other 👊🏿

  • @derekmorcom9431
    @derekmorcom9431 3 месяца назад +10

    Ask me at any point in my last relationship and I would've probably answered that I was the magical INFJ who randomly found his fairytale romance where all my dreams came true. Meanwhile, I had constant autoimmune problems, hypervigilence, sleep disorders, horrible anxiety, depression, daily body pains, attachment issues galore.....all while completely obsessed with how "amazing" my relationship was. I'm happy to have woken up from that fantasy.

  • @judypayne4251
    @judypayne4251 3 месяца назад +14

    I had an amazing exciting relationship. With a narcissist. Now I know all about narcissistic creeps that will leave you broken on the floor. Tell it W!

  • @LyraMeldy
    @LyraMeldy 2 месяца назад

    I totally 100% agree to choose ourselves despite everything and be excited about our life even if stayed alone,and view relationship as addition🙏💪

  • @aquariusstar7248
    @aquariusstar7248 3 месяца назад +3

    I love the way Wenzes brings clarity. A few years ago, I realized that my problem was that I was always choosing guys who seemed exciting and bold. After being shipwrecked multiple times, I thought I needed sb who was boring. This person gave me so much attention and support and it felt wonderful. But I lost interest in him because he had no plans or goals for himself. I broke things off, but I was so confused. Now I understand: exciting partner and boring relationship. Still choosing to be alone for a few years now, I'm realizing the challenges I've had in motivating and inspiring myself. Learning how to do this has been an uphill battle and rewarding. I feel safe knowing that if I do get another partner, I wld be able to stand on my own 2 feet knowing that I know how to manage my own energy. You're amazing, Wenzes!!🎉🎉

    • @DearYoungerSelf111
      @DearYoungerSelf111 2 месяца назад

      Kudos for being self aware! Question: the previous guy that had no plans/no goals - was this the deal breaker or did you break it because he was boring?

  • @TheMoonWalker321
    @TheMoonWalker321 Месяц назад

    INFJ's I've had a relationship that gave me that emotional "high" but eventually it did stabilize. All emotional overflows stabilize when it's a healthy relationship, though there could be moments were the excitement returns periodically. But you don't need constant " excitement " to love a person, just spending time in a calm way is healthy and helps it grow.

  • @iamnoteric
    @iamnoteric 2 месяца назад +1

    only 88k subs? youre underrated. understandable since infj are 2% of the population. but thanks for looking out for the most misunderstood type. infj epic life ftw!

  • @naturalPaths
    @naturalPaths 21 час назад

    I am 72. I've been a widow for almost 7 years now. I recall saying to my late husband in last 20 years of a 40 year marriage, " Love me less. Be nicer."

  • @zhadann_
    @zhadann_ 2 месяца назад +2

    What a perfect timing for this video to be recommended to me

  • @auroracoriolis
    @auroracoriolis 3 месяца назад +3

    So true! Thank you, I needed to hear that because I am in the 'boring' romantic relationship. It is great, supportive, and full of love, but I started to wonder if this is something I want (aka it's 'boring', so I panicked 😂)

  • @DearYoungerSelf111
    @DearYoungerSelf111 3 месяца назад +4

    I do want an exciting life without the chaos - I am detoxing from one of these chaotic relationships and have not experienced a stable healthy "boring" relationship" before. So..I am ready and willing to do the work to overcome this. I'm talking to a guy now and these toxic patterns I am use to are popping up -- like where is the excitement?! Thanks for the video- I have new items to add t my checklist to remind myself of the healthy things I need from my partner and keep investing in my life and keep the activities hobbies etc I love in full swing. I'm not gonna lie, It is like I am detoxing from a drug- To feel the rush after arguments or just these high emotionally intensive moments- is euphoric and addicitive but after the high I drop to the ground like dead weight and have to rebuild my esteem all over again. Again, much appreciation Wenzes for your thoughtful insight/advice ❤

  • @cherylhall7918
    @cherylhall7918 3 месяца назад +2

    Such a good video, thank you! It’s always been easy to distract myself with crushes and fantasy relationships and also affairs. The hardest thing for me but the most worthwhile was to stop and look at my own life and build a life I love. I’m still working on this but it was a key moment in my life when I recognized this pattern in myself. I’m yet to be in a boring relationship but I’m actively avoiding the “exciting/unpredictable” relationships while I’m actively focused on building a life I love.

  • @grumpyschnauzer
    @grumpyschnauzer 3 месяца назад +5

    I forget this sometimes but what you are saying is true.

  • @flynneart1111
    @flynneart1111 3 месяца назад +6

    True that it always loses the thrill, no matter what and science has studies on this- they say that if that passion stayed the whole time, you'd lose your sanity becuz it's too much on your brain. This high was meant to get humans to procreate and then becomes something deeper

    • @braxtonmills1235
      @braxtonmills1235 3 месяца назад

      Lol you lose the losses and years of wasted time. If you want that back they are there :):).

  • @mlbullbooks
    @mlbullbooks 3 месяца назад +5

    Exactly, Wenzes. Totally agree! 🦋💯

  • @naturalPaths
    @naturalPaths 21 час назад

    What a great video.

  • @vivianebuelens9512
    @vivianebuelens9512 3 месяца назад +2

    I Will Think it over ! A
    No ger back to you wenzel’s thaks for your input 😊‼️ 10:30

  • @davidthompson5846
    @davidthompson5846 3 месяца назад +2

    This is gold, Wenzes. Thank you!

  • @Virvepaulina
    @Virvepaulina 3 месяца назад +1

    Loving this!!!!

  • @lindateuling7862
    @lindateuling7862 3 месяца назад +1

    I found this video to be worded in a unique way - and I think it's confirmed a way I chose to order my life. Yes, an exciting life sounded great, but so did a good relationship, and I was puzzled as to whether it was possible to have both. It almost seemed like they were likely to be mutually exclusive.
    I remember choosing to concentrate on what I was "doing" (work, hobbies, activities) and keep my mind and heart open to having a stable, compatible relationship where what he and I liked and enjoyed would be compatible. My priority was for harmony and contented stability - in other words, the relationship could be a RESULT of two contented people who could help each other in a compatible way.

    • @DearYoungerSelf111
      @DearYoungerSelf111 2 месяца назад

      Hi Ms Linda - Did you find the relationship you described?

    • @lindateuling7862
      @lindateuling7862 2 месяца назад

      @@DearYoungerSelf111 I married later in life because I found someone with whom I had some important things in common. Overall it was a good relationship. We had to work on our relationship and build it, but it was basically good. I am now a widow; but I'm grateful for the years we did have.

  • @Virvepaulina
    @Virvepaulina 2 месяца назад

    I love this woman 😂😍

  • @jasmin1773
    @jasmin1773 3 месяца назад +6

    Ah, it's about fear of commitment.

  • @mycapitain843
    @mycapitain843 2 месяца назад +1

    How to find a girlfriend like that?

  • @Scaredycat55
    @Scaredycat55 3 месяца назад +1

    Great program thank you for sharing and making understanding it a piece of cake .

  • @braxtonmills1235
    @braxtonmills1235 3 месяца назад

    Exactly. So smart. Wow your amazing. I admire this. So intelligent. Eather we do boring and stack up. Or excitement drained out and us putting in more.

  • @dddenes
    @dddenes 3 месяца назад

    I had an exciting relationship... and I broke up with that girl six years ago. I gave her another chance not much later, and it became boring soon enough. So, so good.

  • @PhinaLuv
    @PhinaLuv 2 месяца назад +1

    I needed this so bad

  • @johncohan.mosh.5403
    @johncohan.mosh.5403 3 месяца назад

    Thank you wenzee,so dead on 100%
    Thank you,your amazing,i needed this one & todays video ,hand in hand

  • @manukahoney3442
    @manukahoney3442 3 месяца назад +2

    Most people even do not notice the difference between their relationship and their life. 🤷‍♂️

  • @dawnmurphy1169
    @dawnmurphy1169 3 месяца назад +1

    ❤How did you get so insightful? Amazing perspective! Thank you

  • @vivianebuelens9512
    @vivianebuelens9512 3 месяца назад +1

    Thanks * 10:30

  • @deborahwolff5651
    @deborahwolff5651 3 месяца назад +1

    I'm just too different from most people. I can't seem to find the type that is inspired by my interests. It's frustrating!

  • @kan0762
    @kan0762 3 месяца назад +1

    Finally! Someone said it!

  • @Sarabasim2002
    @Sarabasim2002 3 месяца назад +1

    Can you make a video how to know if you are a healthy INFJ and if you are on the right path in life?

    • @Wenzes
      @Wenzes  3 месяца назад

      I'll put it on the list for the next weeks ;)

  • @michal4341
    @michal4341 3 месяца назад +1

    Thank you

  • @luciana1930
    @luciana1930 3 месяца назад +2

    I totally agree

  • @abdullahjelani5602
    @abdullahjelani5602 3 месяца назад

    Awesome work 👌

  • @mariaisabelmendiola9670
    @mariaisabelmendiola9670 3 месяца назад

    so on point, OMG and thus is sometimes best bet that an older single man that is stuck himself on routine while meeting his needs without jealousy OMG the path cocreated by his dier want of you and your need of building yourself reassuring one another of always being there for each other, with not even sex being a factor but companionship .....puppy love at its finest Id say

  • @ronnie_mukherjee
    @ronnie_mukherjee 3 месяца назад

    Great video

  • @Multichick
    @Multichick 3 месяца назад

    10:47 💜💜💜 this is what I was missing, imo…

  • @cavemanrob
    @cavemanrob 3 месяца назад +3

    I don't want any relationship. Single, not on the market, and life is awesome!

  • @McD-j5r
    @McD-j5r 3 месяца назад +1

    True!

  • @sebastianwapniarski2077
    @sebastianwapniarski2077 3 месяца назад

    When I thought I've heard it all.

  • @Punk510
    @Punk510 3 месяца назад

    Hahaha......
    Have both.
    Life is too short

  • @iartol
    @iartol 3 месяца назад

    Internet: Tell me you're married to an ISTJ without telling me you're married to an ISTJ.
    Wenzes: You need to have a boring relationship!

    • @iartol
      @iartol 3 месяца назад +1

      I agree though. The stability is transcendent.

  • @emili4353
    @emili4353 3 месяца назад +3

    What about work, should be boring too?..

    • @braxtonmills1235
      @braxtonmills1235 3 месяца назад

      Yes it will calm you
      Boring with cash.

    • @emili4353
      @emili4353 3 месяца назад

      @@braxtonmills1235 Boring you mean without stress or just boring?..

    • @braxtonmills1235
      @braxtonmills1235 3 месяца назад

      @@emili4353 Both just be bored and count up your cash.

  • @SuperImnot18
    @SuperImnot18 2 месяца назад +1

    bad ass

  • @beginnereasy
    @beginnereasy 3 месяца назад

    Words don't mirror life and aren't the origin of it

  • @angelarrkhu4606
    @angelarrkhu4606 3 месяца назад +1

    To my models i cant reach of you in this planet earth coz im just alone. I dont have power. Livestream Memories is enough 😎

    • @angelarrkhu4606
      @angelarrkhu4606 3 месяца назад

      And stop to feels in me that thers a blessings to coming. What i mean dont stop.

    • @angelarrkhu4606
      @angelarrkhu4606 3 месяца назад

      Khit hadlang ako sa wealth ay wala den nmn ako magagawa 👍🏻

  • @renitawilliams1563
    @renitawilliams1563 3 месяца назад

    ♥🙏

  • @braxtonmills1235
    @braxtonmills1235 3 месяца назад

    I hope i created dopamine in your life:);):)

  • @leonidas7692
    @leonidas7692 2 месяца назад +1

    Spelling of relationship in the thumbnail @wenzes

    • @Wenzes
      @Wenzes  2 месяца назад +1

      Thank you!!!