I feel like teenagers are not allowed to have an awkward phase anymore. When I spend time with my little son at a playground, I see plenty of very young girls, not even teenagers yet, who already look perfectly perfect. I mean, long silky hair, nice makeup, trendy clothes. It's not like I didn't try to look trendy and adult when I was a child, but I had an opportunity to learn from my own mistakes using makeup and combining clothes. I could wear, I don't know, a silly-looking violet T-shirt with smiling emojis and feel great. Now I see all those instagram mothers with their instagram daughters wearing crop tops at 10 years old and it just feels wrong.
Here’s my POV as a teenager. While I do have some of my awkward moments here and there. There is an immense pressure to be perfect. Mainly because of the influences of social media. Also, anyone can whip out their phone and record and post you on social media at anytime without your consent. So you feel like you need to be perfect at all times. Kind at all times. Socially acceptable, at all times. Because one slip up and your on the internet with you entire future ruined
@@theddaeyeah, I always feel like people are watching. And they are. Funny thing is, I'm barely on social media. So I'm not doing it for the internet but now that I've entered college, I feel the need to dress the way other girls are dressing and even the people close to me said I should start wearing more crop tops and shorts. Nowadays people also make friends based on aesthetics so it's like I'm also trying to fit in somewhere since I don't have any friends here either.
In combination with the feeling of not being allowed because of social media, fear of missing out, etc. They also have the added advantage of not really having to go through an awkward phase because the answers are all at their finger tips. There's not much exploration to be had to try to fit into the mainstream, they can just Google or watch a RUclips tutorial. No awkward "first time trying eyeliner." They've got step by step guides for everything without ever needing to talk to their parent or I remember trying to figure makeup out from library books + trial & error
Yeah. I feel like gen z (or rather the older half of gen z) was the last generation to experience tween hood. When I was in middle school, though I thought some of the girls who went at my school looked "super cool" at the time, kinda looked silly, looking back. Our selfies were cringy, we said dumb sounding stuff online, our clothes were "childish" and looked like something out of a Disney channel show, our make up looked atrocious, and our hair was dyed and styled in bizarre ways. But you know what? We had fun, and though peer pressure and social media already existed, it wasn't like it was today. I think that being a tween in the early 2010s, it was like a transition period between the different culture shifts, if that makes sense, since social media was becoming more and more prominent in our lives throughout the 2010s. It was when Claire's and Justice were still kinda popular, though maybe not in the same way it was in the 2000s, but certain things that were considered normal for our age were starting to be deemed as "too childish" for 12 year olds, and some girls wanted to feel a lot more adult.
Adults don’t allow kids to be kids. At least once a week there’s a viral quote tweet of a person over the age of 25 making fun of kids… being normal kids.
yes! its so annoying when you see people complaining about kids growing up too fast and looking like theyre adults, when the same people will turn around and make fun of kids just having fun and being kids. like what are they supposed to do???
Or my pet peeve when adults over 35 say that their generation looked older because "they were more mature than kids today". I can't speak for all of gen z, but for me, that put more pressure on me to act and dress more mature when I was a teen. Older generations always try to change their criticisms depending on the situation. They'll complain that kids grow up too fast one minute and then say that kids aren't growing fast enough in another, whenever they're trying to feel superior. You can't win.
@@mynameisreallycool1 honestly I think the pressure to do that as a teen myself is more in social media. Nowadays we are watching shows like euphoria or Riverdale with literal adults portraying teens. Teenage girls feel like they have to look like Alexia Demie (a 30 year old grown woman). it's not like back in the Hannah Montana days where you had little Miley portraying someone of her actual age
@@arnau6020On point. Adults have always rolled their eyes at teens for their interests (Twilight comes to mind more prominently to me), or their behaviors, but nowadays medias aimed at teens are nearly non-existent- It's either for children, adults, or in rare cases, it's all-ages. Or if teen medias exist, the way people obtain their entertainment nowadays makes them very easy to dismiss or miss entirely. The youth doesn't watch TV or subscribe to age-appropriate magazines anymore. They go on social medias, where they're mingled with adults constantly.
I'm 19, on my last teenage years. I feel like todays teenage youth is maturing rapidly because the adults have been rushing us to grow up by forcing adult responsibilities on us, plus the adults are mostly judging than helping today's youth. And so much crazy stuff is happening outside to the point. Kids are lucky enough to make it back home safely
Believe me, we want you to stay kids and not grow up until age 25 but alas Regan fucked the world up in the 1980s and made it impossible for young people to suceed and be financially independent thus creating hustle culture.
Exactly, what adult responsibilities? The past two generations have had the least adult responsibilities. I was a latch key kid and still, all I was expected to do was the dishes and take the meat out of the freezer. Barely cleaned my room. My kid gets chofered everywhere and only is expected to do dishes on occasion and clean their room as well. This is the most spoiled generation yet
@@jibarabicha4853you sound like you were a spoiled kid. My siblings and I were expected to clean the entire house (including washing inside and outside the fridge and other random things) mow the lawn, cut wood for fire, clean out the car we didn’t drive, do compost recycling and garbage, just to name a few and we lived in a small suburban house
The adult responsibility part is so true. I also feel like being a black teen, POC parents (not all but a lot) want the kid to deal with all this shit but then whenever they say they struggling to the point they are depressed they are told “Your not depressed”
As a teen myself, the main two reasons for the lack of socialization I've observed is that: 1) Teens (especially girls) don't go out much because every third space is filled with creeps. Maybe it's because I live in a big city, but we can't go out to a simple park or movie theater without being catcalled or groped. Libraries are basically non-existent, and the only things most teens read nowadays (if they read at all) are colleen hoover-esque romance novels. 2) Parents are stricter on teens than ever before. I think it's more prevalent where I live (Asia) but teens are shovelled from school to academies to home to school. We're not let out anywhere either, because it'll affect our studies. That's why most of us socialize through social media. About fashion, where I live you're supposed to dress like a grown woman the moment you're going through puberty. There's absolutely ZERO brands for teen wear because it just doesn't sell. Besides, seeing all the influencers on social media, everyone wants to dress like them in order to look "pretty" and "grown up".
@@coralovesbean ikr!! even dressing a bit out of the norm gets u so many dirty looks. I went to a school event dressed in gothic lolita and everyone (even my friends!) ignored me
Yes it’s true parents today are way more strict than they were in the past that’s crime back 50 years ago was higher because there was no strict parents. And teens today are more well behaved.
As a 15 year old this is very true. When it comes to socializing I can tell it's harder for some people. Personally me and my friends hang out at Starbucks, the mall, and we plan to go to the library to study. And also for the not going out part, for a certain amount of us it's not wanting to go out but for the other half it's our parents. They see the dumb teens on social media and automatically assume it's all teens. So social media not only gets to us but our parents as well.
as a 16 yr old from nyc i have to agree. i cant speak for how it is in other states/places but here there is so much anxiety among parents its insane. despite living in a very safe area, since the news is everywhere/so oversaturated, parents see all the bad stuff and assume it happens more often than it does so they put all these restrictions on their kids. my parents are more strict about school than going out so i dont have to deal with it as much but i have some friends who’ve never even gone on a bus before because their parents are scared something will happen. i get the logic but at that point that kid is gonna have 10x more trouble when they’re forced to be independent
Teen/youth culture and subcultures are still there, but it’s certainly quieter than it was in the past. I was a teen in the late 2010s (I’m 21), my mom was a teen in the early/mid 80s (MTV, breakfast club, etc) she graduated high school in 1985. It’s imo, it’s because it’s the death of monoculture. Nobody’s watching the same things all at the same time. Nobody’s listening to the same stuff either. Everyone has their own little niche.
I just turned 20 and I couldn’t agree more. But when I was a teenager those teen medias were already disappearing, we barely had anything everybody wanted to be grown GROWN.
I have to agree with this. I also find it kinda weird that there really isn’t a lot of places that are made for teens/teenagers online kinda? Or even just kids like there used to be a lot of online spaces for younger people like games or chatrooms or fandom spaces are either are just blended into social media (that gets more similar over time) or discord/live-streaming over idk, playing club penguin/RuneScape or spaces like that. A lot of the websites and places I used to go to as a kid/teen online get shut down, so a lot of individual niches that used to have community and social aspects to them are more so just aesthetic choices personally rather than subcultures
you are all so right in my opinion, i think that everything is so individualized now that it’s hard to find a community and commit to it without feeling like you’re abandoning everything else about you. i think newer generations don’t like to be inside of a box.
You make a really good point. I have a love / hate relationship with that. I love the freedom to be individual but also hate that it seems impossible to find people to connect with and things to talk about. There's just constant different news and everyone follows such different things.
The problem is that your perception is based on your experiences, which have never included a world in which youth culture is really a driving force, so in your mind of course it's still there but it's like telling someone from 300 years ago that sugar is still important, like, yeah kinda we eat it every day, but in the 1700s shit was so expensive it could be used as currency, pretty sure they fought wars over the stuff, it's just not the same thing. Our generation actually doesn't have any specific youth culture, the closest thing would genuinely be tiktok culture but that's again not defined by age as much as use of an app. I think you're right about the death of monoculture driving this loss of youth culture though, declining birth rates are probably contributing too (youth culture pretty much peaked with the baby boom), the fact is there are just way fucking less of us and our ability to control what media we consume and what information we're exposed to and what people we interact with is unprecedented, I mean it's hard to be a united cultural force when you don't need to leave the house to make friends or meet like minded people your own age, they don't even have to live in the same area so your ability to resist social pressure to conform to one belief or another is higher without you having to put half as much effort in, there are no stakes anymore. You had to really work to be a subculture kid in the 80s because you relied on that social identity to form community and have friends and without those you literally had nothing, if you didn't fit in the mainstream you had to fit in with the weirdos to survive. Now fitting in barely even exists anymore and no one really cares that much whether you perfectly meet the criteria to belong to a particular group, in fact the list of criteria itself is becoming smaller and smaller, groups are more amorphous and flexible and the edges are blurred, nothing is really important to today's youth specifically. The things that are important to us are important to most people. "Youth" subculture has become just subculture.
Yeah I’m 27 and I just feel like a kid who somehow survived to adulthood. But at least I have money to spend on those cute clothes I was too shy to wear when I was an actual teen and I can wear them to the pub and get drunk with other ‘kids’ wrestling with the same realisation 😅
I’m 16 and this is 100% true, I ended up deleting both TikTok and instagram because it’s literally turning into an actual addiction for teens now a days.
I'm trying to do this too but I feel like I'm actually getting addicted, I downloaded the app because I saw all my peers doing it so I felt like I had to, and plus I don't really like tik tok I just have it to have it. Lol
I'm 16 and I've done the same thing a couple of months back. Sense then i feel like at least 15% of the social pressure to be a certain way, Has been lifted.
I’m 19 I never downloaded tik tok I always thought it was toxic but now insta is becoming toxic and draining every comment I see is hateful towards everyone racist anti lgbtq bullying kids I saw one post of this little boy crying because his grandma died and people was saying womp womp and we don’t care I want to delete it but I have online friends I text on there
I read Instagram to cheer people and watch mental health education and philosophy and read history,I think it depends how you use it and can still read books in real life instead of gadgets and I balance both time for Doing real life non-digital activities and time for scrolling instagram.If you use it for validation,then it is likely you become addicted.I don't use it for validation.I use it to read facts of posts about mental health from professionals and learning to make crafts when making homemade diys and learning my skill on tutorials of art I watch in videos and still know how to balance time for it
As a 16 year old girl in the US (Florida), I can see how "tween" culture is disappearing around me. I was very different from the 12 year olds now days when I was 12, and that wasn't even long ago. Kids in elementary school are vaping now and it's crazy to me. There really is no in-between awkward phase for kids now either. And as for the third spaces, my third spaces and a lot of other people's third spaces in my age group are literally just random parking lots where we all go to smoke weed lol. I'm 7 months clean from pills & shit like that, and when I was in rehab there were so many young girls (ages 10-14) addicted to so much bad shit because it's romanticized in media now, plus there's barely anything to do as a developing young person!!!
I think the Pandemic is a huge reasons for this. A lot of teens lost their teen hood during this time (proms or homecomings (either canceled or virtual), remote school, graduation, etc.) between 2020-2021 maybe early 2022. I was a teen in the early 2010s and I've notice a lot of teens today romatizing that era already. Like I said, I think the pandemic took away their teen years away and started to romantize mine because they didn't fully experience teenhood if that makes sense. Like when I saw a tiktok of a girl saying "ugh to be a teen in 2014" I was like what? Then realized she was 16-17 so the poor kid was around 12-13 years old when the Pandemic happened and I couldn't imagine spending the majority of your teen years stuck inside and doing remote school work.
As someone who was also a teen in 2014, the thought of hearing teenagers say that they wish to be a teenager in 2014 is kind of funny, though obviously understandable, given the context. It's still making me feel old though. Lol
damn. that's a really good point. i was a young teen in the early 2010s and i hadn't even thought about that angle. no wonder The Kids TM romanticize what we had.
Right cus I feel like it’s just like it’s so depressing to just be alive even as a teen. Like my life is so fucking boring and depressing. Nothing is new anymore just school and home.
11 месяцев назад+13
Damn, I reeeaaallyyy feel so sorry for these teens that had the pandemic steal their teenhoods. The pandemic already sucked for me, being a young adult and all, I can't imagine how much it sucked for them. To have spent my teen years locked up at home 24/7 with my family and terrible news and student duties all the time,would have been unthinkable, I would probably have exploded or something, just impossible.
It’s just hard sometimes because we’re made fun of for going through awkward phases or acting our ages and we’re told to grow up but when we do it’s a problem it’s like there’s no winning
I hated the teenage phase , like i was old enoght to be getting responsabilities after one another and be expected to not be childlish anymore and mature but at the same time i was too Young and my autonomy and feeling got invalidated and i only was expected to do chores, help my parents and school anything else was a distraction...
@@lilpretzel5629 exactly and I feel like people don’t understand that we have pressure to grow up but to act our age at the same time it just makes everything so much harder
@@lilpretzel5629 and on top of all that we’re constantly getting judged by not only people in our lives but random strangers too like the “when I was their age” thing like I constantly feel like random adults are always judging me for no reason
Theres a lot of pressure and bullying too, like you cant dress the way you actually want because people will bully the hell out of you, or if you do its like there is only ONE way and if you do it wrong youre automatically not a part of that group or something.
@@Najeetatika To some degree yes. I do think however that it's gotten worse and more pervasive. With teens/tweens constantly consuming social media and images of 20 something inluencers (often wearing more revealing styles) they feel way more pressure to act and dress like a young adult. And as for bullying cyberbullying has become huge. It used to just be like a kid wears something "uncool" at school and other kids talk about them/bully them at/after school but now there's no escape cuz kids can be bullied 24/7. They can share your ig posts in a private group chat and make fun of you that way or make a whole account making fun of you. Also you mention you're 22. I'm 23. when we were teens was when this was all starting so ofc you'll think highschool was always like this. its not like you're a different generation
I was a band director and can confirm with current middle school kids and at the last school (that I quit in the dead of night booo 🖕🏻💩), the bullying is horrendous. That last school it was petty and it could just be about clothing. That community was entitled with money and attitude. I heard those exact comments about if you weren’t wearing the right shoes, for example. At the previous job, I had an admin talk to me about two girls. To make sure they were separate. I was surprised to learn one was bullying the other at lunch (she was bright, perky, showed leadership qualities and played very well!), but wouldn’t dare pull that shit in my band class. Wow. It goes on at school, it goes on during the off hours on the phones. That’s a big difference with this generation. They can be shamed publicly and privately, in person and on public forums of large digital audiences with posts or snaps or whatever that could go viral. My district had it in the county rule book that they would go after cyber bullying. I don’t think they had the man power to do so!! It’s crazy.
@@s.severn social media existed when i was in high school? we had facebook instagram twitter hell i think tiktok had just popped up too im gen z im just apart of the slight older part and cyber bullying was going on with millennials l too they just had aol myspace and chat forums
As a teenager, I feel like we as a generation have been robbed of the traditional teenage experience. This is supposed to be a time of experimentation and socialization, but most of us have strict parents who won’t even let us meet our friends. Actually, there’s nowhere for us to hang out in the first place. I wasn’t alive in the 80s-90s era, but from what I’ve gathered there is a lot more pressure on us to behave as mature adults compared to past generations. It’s sad to me. (Edit: In addition, I really feel like teenagers of my time are pressured to look more homogenous. Even across different styles/"cores" there is a look they all have in common. I don't know how to explain it really.)
@@creepycrybabyxoxo Please don’t. Even though we’re not growing up in an ideal world, there’s still so much to live for. I know it sucks. Hang in there, okay?
@@creepycrybabyxoxowhy don’t you nut up to it then, and stop spamming the same comment under every single goddamn comment? i simply moved on the first time i saw one you wrote, but after seeing so many direct copies of it under various comments, this is obviously like baiting. shut the fuck up and have some respect for those actually struggling with mental health issues you troglodyte
@@creepycrybabyxoxogirl im way older than u, trust me, ur still very young, enjoy ur teenhood. I remember crying when i was 15 and making a reddit post which read like "im turning 16 tomorrow im really sad." We all been through it lol dw
Yo, teenager here! The decline of teen culture is super damaging. I've been a Hot Topic girlie since I was nine, and I was super happy about it! I loved all the graphic tees and dorky Invader Zim hats. By middle school, I'd discovered aesthetics, and I was obsessed. By thirteen, I was wearing thigh highs and mini skirts on the daily. I got majorly groomed. I was lucky enough to have snapped out of it before anything got really bad, but as adulthood quickly approaches for me, I can't bring myself to dress that way anymore. I can only wear baggy clothes because I'm hyperaware that people see teens as adults, or in other words, free real estate. The disappearance of teen-hood is so dangerous in the predatory world we live in.
As a 16 year old, I agree that there has been a lack of third spaces. Just yesterday, I was talking with my friend on how there are barely any places for us to hang out now, especially without spending money. Also, back when I was a tween, I really felt the lack of media for that age group. I was too old to watch kids shows, but too young to watch those “teen dramas”. As a result I just shifted to anime and manga cause I felt like it was the only thing out there for me at the time. Even now, as a teenager, I still feel like there needs to be more relatable modern (Gen Z focused) teen media. Sure we have shows like Europhia, but that’s mostly for young adults. I found a few good shows that I enjoyed and could more so relate to, but many people my age are just watching young adult shows. Like, do writers know they can set these places in collage? Because I’m genuinely curious why all these crazy stories gotta happen in highschool. It’s ridiculous.
I think they aren’t put in an college setting bc if it’s college then it’s not like they’re forced to be there, yk? I know it’s vulgar for Highschool but it makes more sense imo, because some people are really vulgar in Highschool, but I understand.
And for the film Industry to market Euphoria for "teens and young adults" is sickening. Like, that show has adults who play minors having explicit sex scenes and shit like that. People of that age shouldn't strive to be having sex, I mean it's fun as long as your safe and both consenting because it's gonna happen regardless, but seriously teens should be striving to build their character and personalities, figuring out who they are. I'm 19, and I'm JUST doing that after dealing Instagram because my obsessions got me caught up into having a stalker. All those years I wasted. For what? Just to remember trauma and abuse and be sad all the time.
I'm 16 as well and I 100% agree with your comment about Tv shows form of representation. Some of the serious topics or hard transitioning periods can be put in college. I can't speak for everyone, but Highschool is not as freeing as some shows portray it to be.
I think this is what’s causing my ADHD paralysis, I get so stuck in thought and so afraid of being seen as competition out in the real world when I’m jus tryna do my thing, I can barely get up from bed without a break down, I hate it sm but I’m gonna look for some real help yeah
in some places it’s jus how it goes and they don’t pay attention age and child labor shi but it feels like such a fever dream seeing 17 year old a BEING KICKED OUT, like it mind boggles me cuz that’s how I was raped and like f, parents are supposed to be angles above all, and this world has jus torn everyone and everything apart
@@aribasquezOwrong. In most countries 17 year olds are in their final years of high school/education and still living with their PARENTS. Get your old hag ass out of herr
I agree, you don't really don't see a lot of teenagers outside anymore. The only places where you could find them are either a school, campus, park, university or a college.
Inflation is making this difficult as well for both teens and adults. I am a 21 year old with a baby and going out anywhere has been hard. I can count the times I have gone out on one hand this year. Breathe if you can relate
As a 25 year old, there sadly isn’t very many places for teens to hang out anymore. When I was a teenager my friends would go to the mall or the bowling alley or the movie theater. Lots of those things are just dead or closed now. Plus you need money for those things which is hard esp. bc of the recession. There is also social media that’s getting in the way of that which I personally feel like is killing social spaces for teens and even kids.
@@heiext Yeah, living in the time we’re in now I don’t think it would be safe, they’re would have to be some type of adult supervision, even if it’s they’re an aunt or something!
Public libraries are a great third space for teens today as a lot of librarians design teen spaces and teen programming like crafting, gaming, and even book clubs exclusively for teenagers and even tweens. It’s a great place for them to socialize and not have to spend money
teenage sexual activity is definitely at an all time low because NOBODY TALKS TO EACH OTHER. it’s so hard to just date someone as well, because so many people aren’t brave enough to make a move
That’s good that teen sexual activity is low they don’t need it look what happen in the past look how bad it was and teens today are more mature and well behaved. Teens in the past were way worse and wild than what they are today because of sexual activities.
All time low would be a good thing but idk what world u live in where it’s “low”. So many kids experience heartbreak, soul ties, become trifling, lose their ability to pairbond, give up on love, drama, already cheating, spreading diseases, like bro…. I’m a teen and already despise the idea of dating bc of how lustful and casual it is.
I think it’s also important to notice that I’ve seen more teens online with depression and insecurities. Many say that they’re introverts, is just that what’s popular on social media is being an extrovert
I feel like teenagers don’t exist anymore because kids lose their innocence so young. Because of the internet and social media, kids and teens are exposed to a lot of mature content. Teenagers have always had the conflict of wanting to be seen and treated as an adult, but are treated like a child because they are still young and developing. I have also noticed that kids and teens now have even more of a desire to grow up, work etc which I understand, but is kinda sad. I think whatever age you are, it’s better to just embrace it and enjoy it. You’re only a teen for a while, so enjoy your youth and don’t waste it away wishing you were older. Being an adult isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Most adults I know are tired and stressed and miss the simplicity of the life they had when they were younger.
Yes I hope they try and enjoy the time they have now when they’re young as much as they can even if they’re struggling (because when you’re in college on your own you may not have your parents, the same community, or all that time like you think you do :( )
While I agree that teenagers should enjoy this life stage and not be forced to grow up so quickly, I disagree with your last point. Being an adult does not suck. I get it, having to pay bills and worry about all this little stuff you don't have to when you were younger is annoying. But you have freedom. Every life stage comes with its merits and downfalls and imho they're all equal. This kind of talking made me want to me be am adult even more when I was a teen. It's part of being a teenager to want to be older and there's nothing wrong with it. This talking down to teenagers "because it will get worse" just incentives it even more.
i worked as a starbucks barista at a target and when i tell you target is basically the mall now, it really is. parents drop off their kids at target and they spend hours there and meet up with friends, go to starbucks, shop, skate and hang out in the parking lot, etc. there's also other shopping places nearby or next door like five below, books a million, game stop, and basically the same kinda shops you would see at a mall lol. i think third places have shifted from what they were before to what they are now to accommodate modern times. but yes, social media and the internet have definitely made a difference on how connected we are as people in general. hence the downfall of friendships, but that's another topic.
i couldn't agree more & as someone who actually interacts with teens (not in a creepy way i work at a family owned winery where local teens also work) we all often share what we do on our time off & none of them are sitting at home depressed online constantly... i think a lot of adults think because the spaces they had as a teen are no longer around there now just aren't any teen spaces, when that's simply not at all the case target, thrift shops, coffee shops & places like barnes & noble all are huge hangouts for teens, also if anything with the amount of clothing selection there is online now their range of appropriate options is actually way bigger than its ever been , teens dressing more scandalously i think has much more to do with teen appropriate media being shit, which actually comes from the issues that caused the writers strike, it's not because justice fell out of fashion lol, it's that teens in the past looked to actual teen stars for style inspiration because they like the media they produced, there's no longer good movies for teens that's the one part i really agree with, but that kinda goes for all shows & movies now, they're mostly shit sadly... but there's so many clothing companies that cater to modest fashion, also the trend cycle has been basically broken by social media so it's def not because being super sexy is suddenly the thing, that's always been a thing, the biggest difference is less prominent teen stars that actually have quality work, as for teen spaces & fashion that very much isn't a issue in the way the video is framing it in my opinion...
Strip malls and those U shaped complexes with many stores are all that is built. I miss the mall, you couldn't drive up to just the store you wanted except the big stores on the corner, but the food court was fun and inside was designed to look nice and at my mall we had an indoor playground for little kids and then a big fountain that teens gathered by and threw coins into and they also had plants and trees gathered about. The strip malls only have pavement and sometimes a sad looking tiny tree.
The mall by me literally banned tweens/teenagers on Fridays and Saturdays past 5pm. Theres a sign at each door saying minors need an adult with them Friday and Saturday nights. Part of this I think is because alot of them would bring bikes into the mall, try and make viral tiktoks by interviewing people or screaming (“as a social experiment.”) And it did feel like a lot of unsupervised children in one concentrated area. But I fear that now they have nowhere to go on Fridays or Saturdays. And if anything the malls probably the safest place they can hang out. I can’t think of any other place thats walkable, indoors, and they can freely spend $5-$10 on a quick snack or dinner. :( but also like dont run full speed down a crowded mall screaming???¿¿
@@isarme12397 that just seems like a lazy way to deal with the problem. My target would also kick out teens that would ride the store bicycles throughout the store or try to film or harass other people. But that’s what you gotta do. Just kick out the people that deserve to be kicked out, not everyone is a problem.
I'm a teenager and one reason why I don't go out is because I'm terrified, not just socially, the outside world is scary. People get attacked all the time for breathing a certain way. I think back then it was safer to be out an socialize but now you can't even go to Walmart without being scared of getting shot
It wasn't actually any safer to go outside when I was a kid. It's just now days media has hyper fixated on the dangers for clicks and views, so it looks a lot worse than it was back in the '90s. Ignorance was bliss.
@@gamana6179there wasn't as much mass shootings though or people wanting to brandish their guns in public places. There were some but it didn't seem constant or targeting places where children were. In my home state which is very red and gunfriendly and big on hunting, I didn't see many people wearing gun holsters out to normal community activities til about 2016 when Trump came into office. Before then some people had rifles on a gun rack on their pickup but they didn't feel the need to bring guns into grocery store or malls or to parades.
That you could see. I live in a conceal and carry state. There were a lot more than you remember, and the internet probably is the reason for more gun carriers being public about it, too. There is more awareness now than there was, and more kids with guns. That is the big difference. @@jamiewilson1532
@@gamana6179 I think there's truth to both points. There was still kidnapping etc. 20 years ago, but media has made us all focused on what "could" happen. I think it's also true that gun violence and mass shootings have increased sharply since 2000. The pandemic didn't help make people safe in public either.
I’m 17, and I often feel so unconnected with my peers. At school if there is free time everyone just stares at their screens. I’ve struggled to make friends, and that’s partly due to having two years of my high school career taken by COVID, but the rise of technology really has made it harder to communicate with others in person. At least for me, as a still developing teenager it has been difficult.
Same here 🫂. I feel like both COVID and the internet have taken away a concerning amount of my social skills. Only now I'm trying to rebuild such. The world nowadays just doesn't revolve around socialising anymore since everyone's on their phones scrolling.
As a 15 yr old social media definitely plays a role in why we can't just be teens anymore but I hate the fact that adults make it seem like "SOCIAL MEDIA IS THE PROBLEM" and that's just that. The reality is that there's virtually no place for teens to hang AND genuinely enjoy themselves without spending $50 or more, most teens don't have jobs or any steady stream of income, we can't get places without our parents, and because of urbanization most of us live on the opposite side of town from our friends. Getting together with your friends just once a month is a grand achievement in this day and age.
do you feel like if you proposed going and hanging out with your friends in a third space like a mall, they'd say yes? like do teens/tweens today even wanna socialize face-to-face? I'm just asking out of genuine curiosity bc I'm almost 23 so I guess older gen z, yet it feels like the differences between people my age and people only 8 years younger are SO big
@@sfyau0529 Of course, I can't speak for everyone in my age range, but me and my friends want to hang out all the time and usually the biggest factor holding us back is the fact that we have no money or no ride
@@sfyau0529as a 16 year old, yes. I really want to spend time with my friends organically and also meet new teens irl but even if we plan to go to malls its out of our reach because neither do we have to money nor the transportation. I mean we use public transportation but it really gets tiring using it all the time to just get to one place. I really wish there was a place for teens to meet other teens where we just had to bring ourselves.
@megchuu5170 you can't ask your parents for a ride? That's how we did it when I was your age (I'm 39 now) before getting a drivers license. What's changed since then?
This is very true. As a 14 year old I feel like the adults don’t want me going anywhere but want me to stay out of the way. They don’t me here, like my presence is an annoyance. I understand, teenagers are annoying sometimes but, we’re kid, just older kids who are gonna be adults. We can’t start acting like adults but we can’t be to childish. Like, I feel like no one wants teenagers anywhere. Not our parents, not our schools, not our city and definitely not the government. What are we supposed to do. We can’t just become 12 to 20 overnight. Edit: All of the replies are so kind and I gives me some sort of solace knowing others feel the same way I do.
"I feel like the adults don’t want me going anywhere but want me to stay out of the way" YES THIS IS IT. I'm 17 and just like you said it feels like we're a nuisance. I hate the contradiction of "teens are going thru puberty and hormone changes so they're going to be acting different" to then get hit with "why are you acting different?" I legit feel like he family members who used to worship me just don't like me anymore. If i had a concern at 11 it was treated like a real problem but if I have one now? I'm being sensitive and over dramatic.
I understand this soooo much. Like you want us to look like children but act like adults? In school all i hear is your in high school now or grow up. Or this is not middle school. I’m 14 so i’m a freshman. So like what do they expect? At the end of the day we’re just a bunch of kids trying to figure out who we are and eventually the world needs to except this at some point.
@@princesszayna_even though I’m 19 and I graduated last year I can relate my mom use to say this to me all the time even when I was in 9 grade like your 15 its time to grow up your not a child anymore like mom I was 15 I’m not 30
As a 13 year old, this is exactly it. Like, I'm too young to know that I'm gay, but too old to watch one series, too young to watch i different one. I really don't get it.
I'm 17, and honestly, I think most of us (including myself) just don't really care anymore. Like why should I? All the adults in my life tell me the world is doomed and my generation is fucked, and most people that surround us are painfully pessimistic and cynical, so most of us just don't really care to go out and try.
@@aribasquezOno she is not. She is legally a child in ALL countries. Your scutch a freak and it’s obvious from your multiple comments in this section your miserable and hate your life. Don’t you dare try to rush others to grow up. She is a teenager and a child at that. Everyone under 18 is a kid and that’s coming from someone living in Europe. Your a weirdo. Go be miserable elsewhere
There's also this uproar of teens and young adults coming forward to talk about how lonely they are and how loneliness is becoming too intense to bare and it stems from a mixture of social media, lack of third spaces, and how expensive everything is. We're doing nearly a 360 where the workforce is comprised of mostly teens because we cant afford anything and we have no where else to be.
As a 15 year old, sometimes it feels really hard to be a kid. Adults and a lot of my peers tell me to stop acting like a kid or that I'm too childish (when I'm literally an actual kid???). the best thing that I could've done for myself was to stop listening to them and continue living my life as a kid and have friends who don't tell me that I'm "too childish".
As a 21 year old, my teenage years really sucked. I was the quiet kid in the corner that didn’t have too many friends with a dysfunctional family. In 8th grade I was lucky to find my best friend who was a person like me and made a close friend group from that. After high school socializing became pretty difficult and I wish there were more places for me to make friends.
Im 20 and was pretty similar. The bug difference is that I’d make friends then push them away (maybe low self esteem or insecurity caused this). I know many people in my high school hung out outside of school but I have pretty much never been to a 3rd space to hangout
yea as an adult going out and making friends has to be a conscious choice. Like apart from work friends (which I’ve never really had) you have to actively seek out groups of people who enjoy the same things you do in the hopes that you click with some of them enough to hang out outside of that activity. It can be really hard to find the time or to find the right activity to join.
I am european and our third space is mostly the old town, there are many cute cafes, bars, stores, and we have a promenade next to a river which is a place people often go
I was thinking about the same thing!!! I moved to Australia as an adult and not seeing townsquares and places like that is so sad sometimes... They'll have entires suburbs made up of just houses and maybe a train station 😩 no wonder everyone is at either malls or just at home all the time
the old town: yes suburbs: no train station: (:, especially as an american where trains are lackluster, sometimes non existent in most cities @@luraymoondust
As someone who grew up with an older sister from the 2000s when she was a teen, it looked very exciting to be a teen her age, I remember how exciting activities like going to the mall were for her and to me and even thinking “I can’t wait to do that when I’m a teen” I think my teen years weren’t entirely as hyped as I thought were looking back (besides mental health). Now I think of going to the mall as a chore, kind of boring, and depressing because there’s no fun to them now, they’re not the same. I think I still had some sense of community for a little bit but late high school it felt a lot like what you described kind of just being inside and also (little interest/action towards sex BECAUSE I’m inside and on my phone). The pandemic could also be a hugeee reason for this and what you’re talking abt in the video and just overconsumption?
@@creepycrybabyxoxoGive adulthood a try before you decide you don't want to experience it. My life improved a lot once I was in control of more aspects of my life
@@creepycrybabyxoxo What makes you think nothing will be happy anymore once you're no longer a kid? I'm a lot happier now than when I was a kid. Sure, there are bills to pay, but even at 22 I've been able to find jobs better than working fast food that pay decently for fairly low-stress work. And I'm able to cook and eat whatever I want, go out and come back home whenever i want, listen to whatever music I want at home, and more. And plenty of people still think I'm adorable
@@Starsiemania I’m also 14 and feel out of place, but my unprofessional advice from one teen to another, is to embrace the cringe. “To be cringe is to be free.”
i feel like back then being 9-12 we would dress in clothes that made us happy, like a favorite color or fun graphic of something you like, but now since kids want an “aesthetic” the priority lies in how they’re perceived instead of expressing themselves and what they love.
Hot take: I don't think the subcultures prevalent in the past disappeared, at least not alltogether. I still know a lot of peers my age who are punks, emo kids, skaters, or, at the opposite end, preps or nerds. It's just that new niches were created on top of them.
i wouldnt quite consider my friends exactly "mainstream" or "basic" but i feel that their styles dont go further than hot topic, baggy jeans and tshirts, or just basic shorts and simple tshirts. i try to dress gothic (ill admit i just started that so im still in the awkward phase of dressing), i love goth music and media, and dream of going to goth clubs when im older, and i kind of want to see other teens like that. just be involved in these subcultures and share that with eachother. i guess im not doing too much better though, sometimes i struggle with expressing my interests because kids arent exactly kind about anyone who wears a bit of black
@@tomfoolery666 don't worry kiddo, you'll find your crowd, and I can guarantee that these crowds do still exist, it's just harder to come by peers with similar interests if you're not living in a big city
yes!! me and my best friend both love alternative stuff, we both absolutely love the band mcr and also nu-metal; and one of my other friends likes metal too. my best friend dresses pretty emo but i dress basic ish i guess because its what feels comfortable and i think it looks nice, also i cba to redo my entire wardrobe lol - i would love to dress more goth-ish though because its so pretty. we find 2000s emo/scene things online too and its so cool!
@@verycoolwhaleshark same here, I'm super into anything post-hardcore, metalcore, nu-metal and pop-punk (and MCR has also been my favourite band since I was 16), and I also dress quite basic compared to other alt people I know (because I don't have the patience to do anything other than to throw on a t-shirt I found on the floor and yesterday's jeans), but sometimes I wish I put more thought into how I dressed
@@verycoolwhaleshark also, for alt clothes, I can't stress this enough: thrift stores, your mother's clothes from the 90s, family owned chinese or turkish shops, outlets, swaps, small independent businesses, basically anything that isn't a multi-national chain. After all, punk culture was built on individuality, and I've found treasures that are uniquely mine in all of those places
I remember then i was a teen, the coolest kids weren’t the rich ones but funny ones, smart ones, and “mysterious” ones. But still everyone was talking to each other and helping each other,and we really were a team. We used to have group of friends and always hang out, that’s actually helped me with my social anxiety. Maybe i am just old
I work at a library and there are teens all over the library. We have teen spaces for teens to chill or participate in activities. A lot of libraries have places like exactly what youre describing. A place for them to just chill and hang out. Its unfortunate that its just not widely known.
They don’t even MAKE teen magazines anymore!! For real. It’s saddening. My kids love magazines I bet they would love teen magazines when they are older. When I was a teen in the 90’s I shopped at thrift stores for a grunge look and then a bright mixed media vintage look. It was so fun, and magazines like Sassy were part of my inspiration. The 3rd spaces for my neighborhood youth is definitely boba tea shops; I live in Portland OR and they are everywhere. Maybe going to a bodega, burger shop, ice cream shop…food related.
I’m 16 and I definitely agree with “third spaces” being more food related. I live in Texas and after football games the local whataburgers & waffle houses are PACKED with other teens that attended the game. I’m in band and we often plan picnics or section meetups at fun restaurants before comps or Saturday games.
there probably are still teen magazines out there, I know I’ve seen some recently. However if they’re not in stores where you are, perhaps you could find them online and get a subscription so that the magazine gets delivered to you, if you think it’s something your kids would enjoy. I highly recommend the magazine Girls Life which is still in production. I remember as I got into my tween years I stopped reading J-14 and tigerbeat and pretty much stuck to Girls Life because they had some good articles about things like health and nutrition and mental health, not just the celebrity and fashion stuff (though they have that as well). I remember reading an article in GL about the dangers of teens vaping back in like 2012.
I was a teenager from the start of 2010s to the end of it, so my peers grew up during that weird stage between the 00s when social media had only just been created, and the 2020s where social media has really evolved at break neck speed. The 2010s was an interesting period to be a teen as this was when Kylie Jenner, that whole 2016 makeup buzz, influencers, Instagram & Snapchat were on the rise. Things weren't necessarily easy for us, because this was when influencers were starting to become a thing, but it wasn't nearly as bad as it is now as at the time it was still a relatively new concept. We still had our awkward teen phase of doing our makeup 'wrong' and yes we wore crop tops and mini skirts, but everything was age appropriate and we still looked like teenagers. This was also when 90s Grunge/Pale Grunge on Tumblr came into trend, so that influenced a lot of how we dressed and acted. Some of us smoked, some of us drank, some of us did drugs, some of us went to illegal raves, some of us had sex - we all wanted to be Effy from Skins. But it wasn't anything out of the ordinary range of adolescent behaviour. There weren't third spaces around, but I remember we would hang out in this massive field/woods that was behind our school, at coffee shops/cafes, the library or the high street (shopping centres aren't really a thing in the UK, or at least London). This was when we still had shops like Topshop, Forever21 as well as when H&M Divided and Urban Outfitter had a distinctive target demographic for teens. So it was a weird time, and whilst there were definitely social pressures (to be skinny, body diversity wasn't like how it is now) and it certainly wasn't the experience of being a teen in the 80s/90s/or even the 00s, I am so grateful I am not a teen now.
Agree! I’m 23 and grew up as a teen during that time too. I believe there are still third spaces at least where I am we still have urban, forever 21, Aeropostale, Hollister etc and I still look at those clothes and maybe buy one or two items there
i'm turning 19 in a few weeks and man, this topic has been on my mind for a while. bc while i don't think teen/tween cutlure is completely dead, i do feel that teen & tweenhood now (ESPECIALLY in a post-covid lockdown world) is much more limited than it once was. i also feel like many people of my generations (gen z) have just never gotten to truly enjoy a "traditional" teenhood simply because it was/is so out of reach. i spent most of my life (esp after middle school) being limited in one way or another from accessing the teenage dream my parents had. i couldn't go out places and do things and hang out with friends like they did. i had little to no room to explore my identity outside of social media bc the opportunities to do so simply didn't exist. and sure, dont get me wrong, i went to malls and movie theatres and participated in the latest fashion trends at school and talked with my friends about music and tv and pop culture. but between the horrors of living in late-stage capitalism and being constantly pushed into a state of faux maturity by the older generations around me, i struggled to engage with them the same way previous generations did. i couldn't fully enjoy these things not because they didn't exist (-- they did then and still do!), but bc they weren't accessible. i strongly feel like this is the main reason why things feel different now. its a cultural shift that goes beyond "those kids and their damn phones!" which admittedly not everyone really grasps. its complex and i love seeing a video try and dig deeper at that.
I’m 19 and I can understand where you’re coming from....there are no animated series aimed at teens...everything has to be Riverdale-esque (I don’t watch these kind of shows). I thought my teenagers from 2017-present will be something similar to the characters in Victorious, Disney Channel and especially Totally Spies. I want to experience the quirky GENUINE teenage phase....but it seems like it’s ERASED......We don’t even have fashion stores catered to us 😭😭😭
i like that teens these days have a better understanding of boundaries and how to set and enforce them. when i look at famous teens of the 2000s and so many of the teen girls were in relationships with older adult men. i like that kids these days aren't interested in experimenting with people who are like....outside of their own age group. good for them honestly!
i also like how it's perfectly safe for them to be an otaku. when i was growing up, being an anime fan (openly) was the equivalent of putting a target on your forehead
@@Crawlingdreams418 im glad teens can like the things they can like without being excessively bullied for it. that being said, the anime industry definitely has a problem with sexualising kids and young high school girls, let's be for real for a second
@@albihysenaj5997 today's teens are more well informed thanks to better education and overall awareness. more and more teens are familiar with how predatory adults can groom them and take advantage of them and know how to spot red flags. Unfortunately, teens in the early 2000s simply did not have better awareness, and that failure should be blamed on the education system and the adults around them. I know so many of them who are older now and grieve how they were taken advantage of when they were just kids and how no adults around them took the responsibility of protecting them from other grown ass adults who were preying on them. it's always the responsibility of older people to look out for those who are young and don't know any better, instead of taking advantage of their inexperience.
I'm just glad I was a teen before social media really took off cuz I think the greater exposure pressures the age group into feeling the need to be/look/act "grown"
@@SubZero-dd3rkI can see the unresolved issues, body dysmorphia, trust issues and trauma now The awkward phase is not only for personal growth but it helps you to remain humble too
As a teenager trying to maintain friendships, the lack of third spaces is really stressful to me. It seems like the only 'third spaces' (that really aren't third spaces at all) that are available to my friends and I are extracurricular activities or attending high school sports games solely as a pretext to hang out.
For some teens there also maybe fear of being filmed and posted on internet without your consent if you hang out in public space. I think this is also how internet and tiktok changed things. I'm from Europe and we have third spaces still( I know in America it's problem), but I don't see teens hanging out in places I or other teens hanged out when I was younger. And I'm in my 20's so that was not so long ago, before tiktok but we had social media, online games and all that.
exactly, im 14 and im terrified of being recorded and posted somewhere without even knowing about it- just the fact that ANYONE has access to cameras right in their pockets and can very easily film you and make fun of you for millions of people to see, when youre just existing and not even doing anything bad
Millennial here in their 30’s. After a loooong hiatus , I went to the club in Miami one weekend. One thing I noticed was how restrained the younger crowd was in the club. It made me sad that this generation doesn’t know what it’s really like to vibe out and turn up with out a care in the world. To literally dance like no one is watching.
Yeah I can see why you’d be forced to assimilate for survival. I dread to think of how a kid going through their awkward cringe stage could be ridiculed in high school and even virally bullied if they’re filmed and posted on sm.
Yeah, just the fact that there could be a video of you simply existing on the internet to see without even knowing how many views it has is insane. You could do anything slightly out of the ordinary or looking different and you have like a 50 percent chance of being recorded, even without your consent. There are literally people who have posted videos of people existing and made fun of them. Now a lot of people have the urge to fit in because of this
I do feel so bad for young kids these days. Some kids have been forced to mentally grow up waaay too fast. You guys have so much potential and a drive for life! You're the future! And maybe that's some pressure but being the future also means creating one that is kind and happy and gentle with meaningful relationships. Im in my 30s currently pregnant with my first and it's scary but that's hope too. Enjoy being a kid, know that you being a kid who makes mistakes but grows and loves is contributing to a bright future too.❤
I commented something similar. I’m a millennial in my mid 30s and had my first child at 33. I feel our generation is also experiencing a shift where back then people were already married with multiple kids by time they were 30 but millennials are opting out of starting families and instead pursuing career and personal advancement
I wonder how many teens and tweens actually associate their fashion choices with all the aesthetics and cores. I remember when I was like, 16 and 17, I observed the cores and thought they were cool, but I never really tried to conform to one
I was a teenager from 2010-2016 and honestly feel so blessed tbh, Those years were hard, but I look back and feel really lucky to have gotten to socialize freely and experience culture the way it was. It’s only coming up on a decade but it’s overwhelming how much times have changed. Can’t imagine what it’s like to be a teenager rn
Uh that was just you. Teens were very into social media back then. Twitter, RUclips, Facebook, Instagram were all gaining momentum and by 2012 they are popular.
@@Boxxxxxxxxx but people still socialized normally. I think 2012-2016 was where social media and teen culture interconnected beautifully, well, as beautiful as those two can. It's tiktok and quarantine that ruined it. If you think that was bad, just imagine now.
as a teen, it's so sad seeing everyone around me (and sometimes even myself, early) just throw away their teenhood an innocence in an attempt to become more "adult-like" if that makes sense :( i could talk about this for hours but ur channel seems to cover just about everything, glad i found it !! but yeah it's super sad to say the least 💔
Honestly I miss the 2010s where girls would skateboard, roller skate and have slap bracelets. Just be a cool girl and not be focused on being a sexy girl
Aww man, I remember going roller skating with my friends in our local park every single day of our summer vacation in middle school and spending the whole afternoon trying to recreate the choreos we've seen in the previous night's episode of soy luna, those were the damn days
@@harpsdesire4200 Idk, but I feel like the commenter feels like there’s a difference between “being cool” and “trying to be sexy” I might be wrong though. Maybe just like ppl who in general were just being themselves and doing things perceived as cool.
@@xxx_these.flightless.wings_xxx my tween/teen era was full of playing the recorder, pillow fights at sleep overs and vibing to trap I could never imagine doing what these kids be doing
im 13 as of right now, and by this time next month 14. 14 to me always was the real "first" year as a teenager. so for me my teenage years have technically just started, and the way you talked about being a teenager and the media surrounding it a decade or more ago sounds amazing. The obsession with aesthetics feels obnoxious to me, but the majority of teens now who are more mainstream seem to be into things i would consider rather boring and uncreative, such as Lululemon. a few of my friends are into things like emo music and shop at hot topic, but that just feels to be the full extent of their styles. i wish my friends were more into alternative subcultures, or at the very least wanted to do more things. Not sure i can blame them though, it seems our options are to check out hot topic at the mall, go to the movies, or just sit in an air conditioned room and talk. there seem to be nothing interesting to do on our part of the island, and the extreme heat (typically 90 to 100 degrees) doesnt allow us to be outside often. the movies i grew up watching made being a teenager seem to be the most exciting part of one's life, filled with love, drama, rebellion, style, endless hours at the mall or events. so far my reality has been scrolling on social media for hours, being made fun of for being "emo" (goth), and having too much homework and nowhere and nothing to do
As somebody who is 18 going on 19, and, thus, at the end of my teenage years, I can tell you that both sides of the coin are true. On one hand, yes, our generation's adolescence is boring and far removed from what we've grown up dreaming of and seeing in older media. On the other hand, friendship, love, rebellion, drama, adventure, courage, they're all universal experiences, that you will get to go through, just in your own way.
Im 38 and European, and when I was 15 yes there more subcultures. But the "mainstream" culture was by far the biggest back then as well. People who were goth that time were also outcasts. What surprises me though that people who are goth basically dress just the same as goths 25 years ago.
As a 17yo this actually hit so hard because you are considered uncool for not dressing like influencers and having a certain aesthetic going for you. My teen years are drawing to an end and I wish to spend the rest of my time here as a happy teen like the happy preteen I used to be before 2019. God, it hurts like hell. Edit: on a funner(imma use that word) side, i remember my giggling and my mom's facepalm whenever we saw a justice outlet anywhere cuz i had to spend time "aww"ing and "mmm"ing over every little trinket they had 😂 circa 2015-16
as a 15 year old i can confirm at least on my part the the ‘hanging out with your friends at a mall’ concept is definitely not dead. shopping in real life stores is much more funner for me than shopping online, it gives me a chance to play around with the way different things fit on me whereas when i’m online shopping it’s more difficult to find any fun in it and to be able to figure out what fits and what doesn’t.
i’m 18, so i’m still a teenager but i’m going into college in a week. but my experience is after covid teenage good kind of died. i’ve had kinda different growing up situation but the mall hit when we were in middle school. but once highschool came around there weren’t rlly places to hangout unless it’s a party, skate park or friendgroup hangout. I don’t know what people younger then me are doing but my age group only goes out if it’s with their friends, thrifting, doing an outside hobby like river, hike, climbing or if there is a party. I feel like cliques still exist but it’s very very different. I live in a very liberal town and kids are def still having sex, experimenting and going out. But i think covid heavily impacted us and now everyone’s introverted
About the last part I’m 19 and never been to a party and didn’t lose my v card or even have my first kiss, until a few months ago, so I definitely felt like I was abnormal growing up, still never been on a date either lol
@@caitlingill I’m 19 I can relate as well never been on a first date or to a party I’m a virgin I remember crying because I never been on a date not in a relationship like other girls what is I’m doing wrong is something wrong with me that nobody wants me
@@imauniryne6757 there northing wrong with you, I don’t think you shouldn’t be in a Rush in losing the “V” card or even been on first date. I’m 20 years old & I’m Virgen & never been kissed or northing like that. I personally have bigger things to worry about then that, I’m 20 and I don’t feel like I have my shit together, I’m not smart Enough to go to College & can’t afford college & for Finding a Job it harder me Bc there is not that many options for me. So you know I’m just stuck at home using social media because I don’t know what else to do. Times are harder for me now & it sucks bc I feel like nobody relates to what I’m saying.
As a kid who has always been "shy"/"intorverted"/"antisocial"/"socially anxious"/whatever you wanna call it, I've always wondered if I'll ever be able to make meaningful connections with others, and I've found the answer now that I've grown up: life puts people and social situations in your way, whether you like it or not, and you will find a way to navigate them, out of necessity if nothing else. 14 year old me would've never thought she'd be able to have a full conversation with someone, let alone an interesting one, but now 18 year old me can't wait for the cigarette break at work, so I can talk with my colleagues about whatnot. That's not to say I don't still struggle with social anxiety, because I do, it's just that I've found out that I can manage it. So yeah, I think the kids are going to be alright.
I'm 19, neurodivergent, and alt. When I say that's a clusterfuck of loneliness, I mean it. There's this massive divide between teenagers who don't want to go outside because the internet is all they need and teenagers who go outside but are very adult and take part in cultures full of drugs, sex, and the likes. It's hard because for my core teenage years I was friends with the former. We had a strong social life but it was all limited to things done online. Whenever I did try to make plans they blew me off or hangouts turned sour, which is why we stopped being friends. But what's crazy is going out trying to find friends seems impossible. Everyone is judgemental and intolerant of normal teenage behavior. They all want to be older than they are. My freshman year of hs kids would brag about their "body count," how many parties they went to, and leak each others unsavory pictures, iykyk... What sucks even more is the lack of third spaces where I can meet these people. I'm a huge fan of music and concert going is a hobby of mine. When I was younger, many shows were 18 or 21+. Now post-covid it seems like even more are 21+ and it sucks because the only spaces I'm comfortable in just,,, aren't accessible to me. It's also hard knowing that when I do go out I can't tell the age of some of these kids. I would NEVER go out of my way to befriend anyone under 17. And it's so weird when they're super cool when engaging in small talk but end up being 14/15!!! That shit shocks me to my core... I feel like the strongest bonds I have are with online friends I made when I was 12 and a few when I was 17. And it sucks because I remain inside. I can't hang out irl with these people and may never be able to. It seems like this never ending cycle of rejection and disgust. Feels like we're in some sort of friend recession =///
That’s so true?! (18 n neurodivergent as well) it’s so weird having preconceived notions of stuff my age, and then finding out the only people into that are like… 15, it’s like I was brought up just as normal teen hood was ending, and I never even got to experience it
The friend recession part cannot be closer to the truth. I'm younger (16) but even people my age are just so sour all the time while trying to be more mature and being so judgemental whenever I try to approach them. It's honestly why I prefer keeping to myself cause it's so hard to actually connect with someone the same age as me.
I am the same alt and everything (but I just turned 20 lol) it honestly gets harder to make friends as you become an adult too. I've been struggling with socializing at my college because everyone is glued to their phones 😭
When I was growing up in the early 2010s, I used to look at what the teenagers then were doing and couldn't wait to have that specifically teenage experience, and now it truly feels like that culture is dead. I did a video on the death of the awkward phase, because there's literally no tweens anymore. Not only is teen culture basically just adulthood light, but even early adolescence has stopped being awkward and goofy. Even 12 year old have perfect makeup and hair now, what is going on.
My older sis was a teen in the 2000s and in her 20s by the 2010s I was always jealous of her and her friends lol now that IM a teen? dawg I don’t even wanna talk about it I just cope and distract myself with small hobbies lol
I’m 25 and always wanted a teen experience like my mum had in the 80s but man… it’s so bad now, I’m honestly so sorry that it’s come to this, I can’t imagine how hard it is for teens these days and I’m scared for my kids to grow up in this world. I know a lot of mums are taking a stand when it comes to tech so hopefully things will change
Currently I'm 18, starting college, etc. I do feel like teen culture is very different now. For me, one of the main standouts is how when you do connect with someone, get their snap, etc, most teens dont follow through and even trying to "organize" social events can be challenging because people don't want to leave their house or whatever reason. This is very different from my dads stories of just being bored at home so getting with friends and doing something stupid. Also, on the topic of teen culture is the decline of the teen celebrity. Growing up, all of the 'teen idols" were from TV, music, etc. I was a big selena gomez fan; but with the exception of the stranger things kids, there aren't many non influencer celebrities to follow from TV, media, etc, not many faces that stick around. I think because of this, teens are forced to look up to these adult figures in their college years or beyond, so they will replicate these adult styles instead of engaging in youth culture.
A lot of spaces has been taken by oversexualization and them wanting to look younger even though they do and they are I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve seen a 13-17 year old girl looking like strippers Like wanting preventative Botox and you’re 20
we keep telling the younger girls it's wrong dressing like that and they hit you with the "you are jealous because i look better and im younger" "stop sexualizing me" "we were forced to dress like this" like ma'am, no one is holding you gunpoint to dress like a hooker 💀 not generalizing but i've seen a lot in tiktok
@@jay-iq6gy I mean they are right though. What is consider modest is changing and will continue to change. Its not bad or good. Clothes are sexual if you make them sexual.
WAKE UP QUEEN HAS POSTEEED oh btw im french and i chose to study english culture and madisyn brown really helps because my teacher told us to watch every english stuff (tv shows, books, music) we can just to be connected to english and what i love w madisyn brown is that she talks about trends and topics that i like so keep up like this U GO GIRLLLLL
I think she is well researched on her topics. That’s what drew me in. Born and raised here in the states and I lived through the history she’s talking about. Haha (The mall walking and hanging out, not the 1800’s haha) So you’re in good hands with her content if you’re curious about American culture and the interesting niches to be found. 👍🏻👍🏻
As a teenager I’d like to say that you and a lot of people in the comments seem out of touch with reality. While I do agree that tween clothing options aren’t as popular anymore they still exist. If you go to a middle school you’ll see most kids dressing their age. Also y’all obviously have not gone to malls or movie theatres in a while because there are always teens there after school. I think the reason it seems like we don’t exist is because your not interacting with us (as you should) . Just my take on the issue ❤️
fr, i will admit there are teenagers that dont dress their age but they mostly exist on social media, go outside to a busy place and you'll see plenty teens acting like teens. i definitely wish there were more spaces for teenagers however, but we just have to make spaces for ourselves sadly D:
@@yessssir I think the main issue is city planning rather than teens not wanting to go out or do things. Its just more difficult to actually get to teen spaces without having to pay :(
@@zahara5173 yess city planning definitely matters! atleast where i live (america) the city planning where i am is a absolute nightmare..😭 if it was easier to get to places meant for socializing, there would be plenty of teenagers there
i'm a 12, soon to be 13 year old teenager. i feel like a lot of girls my age look so mature that it lowkey overwhelms me. don't get me wrong, i love them and they're gorgeous but i feel like i have the need to become and look like them. i definitely think the media we consume influences the way we think and our perception of ourselves. but still im really excited to turn 13 in december but also not excited since im entering highschool next year lol
im 15 and in high school and i still feel the same as you… everyone seems so mature, it feels like me and my friend group are the only kids going through an awkward phase
In Western European countries like Portugal, Italy, and Germany you still see teen oriented stores as many people still go to malls or physical stores to shop. Very common places to shop are Bershka, Pull & Bear, and Astradivarius, all of which are owned by the same company that created Zara yet their target audience is a younger demographic. Online brands like Cider and Princess Polly also serve a young adult/ teen demographic.
I’m 34 and this video made me reminisce about reading all the teen magazines you mentioned and going to the mall with friends, watching teen shows on cable tv (like Degrassi, The OC, etc), flipping through Limited Too catalogs, and trying on every body lotion at B&BW. Now the malls are dead, print media is dead, subculture is dead. How does a teen form a sense of sense when all they have to identify with is TikTok “cores” and influencers who lie about how amazing their lives are and FaceTune themselves to look like a Bratz doll? Like, young people, who are you? I don’t get youth culture at all anymore, damn I feel old lol
im 19 so nearly finished with teenagerhood, but i think the "fitting into an aesthetic" thing is definitely seen more in the younger teens/preteens rather than the ones who are around 17-19. my cousins who are around 11-14, especially the girls, are so much more conscious with how they dress themselves compared to me and my peers. and i agree about the third spaces too! i grew up sheltered and my parents rarely let me go out and i know for sure that that had affected something in me psychologically. i didn't even know the concept of third spaces was a thing until this video! like i get anxious sometimes at the thought of hanging out with friends outside of college, when it shouldn't be that way. i feel if i were allowed to explore more about my interests and identity, let myself make small mistakes growing up instead of being caged up, i wouldn't be this nervous about so many things. also, unrelated, but i looove your videos! i love watching them during my free time or even when doing homework that doesn't require much concentration. you're like the older sister i never had! keep up the good work
I’m 19 as well can relate with feeling nervous and everything my mom always wanted me to go out more make friends hangout with friends still do till this day I only really have one friend
I agree so much!!! It’s like that age from 10-14 that you want to feel good and look good and then something just happens and you transition into that “college sweatpants/hoodie” combo, I’m 17 now and I’ve definitely gone through a few phases 😂
I think honestly this also has a lot to do with people just living longer. It used to be you were only young and healthy in your teens and twenties, so I think people often used to revere being a teen as the peak. When people live longer lives, they become less obsessed with the idea of high school having to be super important socially, because they know life continues to be better after. My teens were horrible but I got through it thinking about being an adult who would be away from the problems that come with the powerlessness of childhood. I think the media shift represents a mindset shift away from revering youth as much. I remember being told high school had to be cherished and id always miss it and it’d be the best time of my life and it was not and I’m so glad that life has more than that to offer.
That’s a good point. A long time ago people would die at 30. Now they have a lot more years to live. So back then they wanted to stay young and innocent for longer. But nowadays you live long after high school.
As a teenager, who only has 2 friends in school that can't hang out out of school, I'm not socially anxious, I socialize a lot in school with everyone, I speak on the lessons too, however I find it extremely hard to find friends out of school which sucks because like I said, even though I do have a lot of "people I talk to", I don't have that group of people who I feel like are actually there for me and I could truly call them friends. I feel like back in the day it was easier to find those people out of school.
Bro this is so me ,but I am social anxious since 7 grade, but all you have said it's true an that is the reason I am scared about the highschool end I will never do friends out of school 💔
I'm the Philippines and malls are still very alive and well here, many people go meet up there and eat and hang out. I'm not much aware about the mall culture there in the west but I've seeing things like a lot of malls are closing or dead there.
I’m 23 now, but being a preteen in the early 2010s and ending my teens in 2019, I remember going through so many phases. First being my experimental half blue/magenta eye makeup and hair feathers, peace sign clothes, like you could obviously tell I was a young teen. Even at 16,17, people could tell my age correctly, we all did makeup but idk, it was just different. Now I see girls walking around looking like mini 20+ year olds. I believe it’s the way social media has influenced us as a whole and doesn’t really target teens like magazines or shows did back in the day. Trends go by a lot faster now, music in some ways is different, I just wish I could see more young girls enjoying their awkwardness before becoming an adult, it’s funny to look back on- but it was some of the best times and best memories to talk about with friends, it all seemed so innocent. The amount of adult content shaping its way into young teens fashion and everyday life is crazy too. Also the rise of the “scary outside world” (I’m scared of places now too due to how the worlds changing), you see less teens hanging out at parks or malls, less distinguishable than an adult at least! 😂 but that’s just my rant. I’ve been thinking of this conversation for so long because I’ve totally noticed a change!
As a 13 yo I completely relate. I was abt 8yo when “tweens” started to disappear. I know how to do my makeup i do skincare but my parents are a little more strict. We dont have jobs and no experience of “hanging out at the local strip mall for the day”. Its not safe to go anywhere and we are hyper isolated. Its a weird time to be alive and i find myself making vows so my kids have a better experience and dont have this weird tightrope walking when it comes to maturing with time.
I feel like we also look past the fact that we lived/living through a pandemic. Teenagers are probably anxious about leaving the house because for a while they weren’t allowed too. It's not like there's much to do anyway (at least in my area). There’s nothing enticing them to leave. And the whole "not sexually active" thing doesn't surprise me considering teens are more aware of political issues and are probably scared to do so.
I am genuinely interested in your content and I appreciate the amount of research and general work that goes into your video essays. Thank you for always delivering informative case studies and for introducing concepts that are not generally well-known. This time around I learned of the concept of ‘third spaces’ and I am inclined to read further into the topic. Kudos!
I don't even feel comfortable going downstairs to the kitchen/living area because I don't feel comfortable around my family so I feel like I only have 1 and a 1/2 spaces. You telling me people used to have 3?!
I'm 27, the current AI "Photo Yearbook" trend is so crazy to me because when I was a teen, we would go to the mall to visit the 'Picture People' store and do big group matching outfit photoshoots for fun. Maybe $5/person and package came with a ton of photos so everyone got to take some home after. I'm grateful to still have a physical item/memory from the old days
As a 13 year old, I have a strict mom, I would love to go out and be dumb with my friends. But, I think my mom is really just worried about me falling into the wrong crowd because of how out of control kids my age are.
Hey there! I’m 15 and from my experiences, it doesn’t seem like these teen subcultures are gone, they’re just a lot quieter than they used to be. I think this quietness has to do with the development of social media and how everything has become a “core” or “aesthetic.” If you’re part of a certain teen subculture, you’re automatically inserted into a “core/aesthetic,” even if that isn’t you. It’s also put a lot of pressure on not being able to go through an awkward phase. At this point in time, you’re expected to know exactly what subculture or “aesthetic” you belong to and you should only stick to that one subculture or aesthetic. It’s really looked down upon to be more than one aesthetic
I am an 80s baby with two teenage girls. You’re right most of it’s online. My girls are absolutely glued to Roblox because that’s how they socialize. But also it seems like after school clubs have become the big new third space. There’s a lot more after school clubs than when I was when I was a teenager. Yes you’re still at school but it’s not necessarily learning it’s just finding people with common interests. I’ve also noticed there’s a lot more hobby camps that go year-round. It just sucks because they cost so much money so it’s almost like the only people who can afford it are those who are privileged with parents with money. Boys and girls club seems to be a great third space. Things I’ve noticed less of our youth groups. As in youth groups that allowed everybody to join and not just those who are members of that church congregation.
I'm 14 and we usually do have "third places" its just that its maybe not the same places. We don't have much stuff to do in our town, so we usually just go out to get boba or some other food or just go to Safeway. I doubt many other people go to safeway for entertainment but you gotta do what you gotta do.
you bring up a really good point with this video. social media is definitely apart of this major shift. it's kinda sad because when i was a teenager in the 2010s there definitely was a sense of teen culture/identity in the media. i miss those days. i had a subscription to seventeen magazine from age 15-17 or so. i also LOVEDDDD the show 6teen! my cousin is a young teen now and i wish she had what i had as a teenager. i think that would make her teenage experience a lot more wholesome. thanks for this video madisyn!!
as a teen someone needs to make a petition to find a place for teens to hangout that doesn’t need to cost money, like some hangout club or something because all we can do it go to the mall or a random park. we need more third spacesss
idk abt everyone else but i’m a teenager in highschool and my friends and i still shop at malls all the time. we still go to hollister and aeropostale. i personally like shopping in person, not online, because the quality and fitting online is often questionable. but i do agree with a lot of what was said in this video, especially in regards to the absence of tween clothing. i went into middle school fresh out of covid and was still wearing my elementary school clothes. in eight grade i started exploring fashion a bit but it wasn’t tween clothing, it was teen and young adult clothing.
As someone who graduated high school in 2019 I kinda saw first hand the effects of social media on teenhood as my sister is now going through her junior year. I can also speak to the effects of not having a third place. As a kid, I lived in a suburban area, and because my parents were not very social, all I had were home and school. This put me wayyyy behind in making and keeping friends, as well as going out and doing activities, so it took me until college to have friends, and until grad school to be able to work on actively making and keeping friends. Not having a third space or a space to go to foster these skills, in combination with the lasting effects of the pandemic, is going to cause some huge issues for youth today, especially those without the money to join clubs, churches or affiliations that provide a paywalled third place.
I'm 16 and there really isn't much to do as a teenager where I live. I'm lucky that I'm more of an alt girl and really like museums and hanging out in cultural/artsy spots. Besides that, malls are still one of the places we go to, being bookstores and the movies the most common places to be in.
I think third spaces didn't disappear COMPLETELY, but they have downgraded a lot. I always felt this lack of places to hang out in my teens, and when i complained about it, people would say things like "you can go to the park". Sure i can, but what are we gonna do there? It's just a place with 2 benches a a tree 🥴
im a teenager and i would hang out at the mall and the library with my friends but tbh, those spaces were very discouraging. like a lot of stores would kick us out just for acting silly? like we wouldn't even be loud or abruptive just talking to eachother and making weird faces or something and then a store would kick us out or a librarian would tell us to stop. which i guess in a library since its a learning space thats a bit understandable but a mall? idk i just feel like on top of social media like theres just a genuine fear that people have of other people just existing and it makes socializing much harder
I'm in my 20s as well and I feel like I caught the transition of pre-tiktok teenhood to after exactly as it was happening. We did have facebook and instagram but most of us still hang out at the mall, in the city center, grabbing coffees and chasing after buses and trains to boy group concerts. I had some magazines and I always loved reading them, analyzing them with my best friends, fighting over posters with my sister, and waiting for the next issue but that kind of ended in elementary school/junior high. We still had a lot of the companionship and teen culture which I kind of miss but I'm sure future generations will have progressively less of it and lose an imperative part of growing up and discovering your identity, making mistakes, expressing yourself, and just having fun. I wish we could keep some of this as adults because it feels like the world is getting more and more cold and indifferent and it's not even our fault.
Every generation thinks the one coming up after them is doing so much worse, but life goes on and things just change. At 26, I can still remember people harping on about how terrible life is for millenials and how we didn't get to experience the cool era of music before social media, we're immature but want to grow up too fast, too fragile, too lazy, etc. It's always something. Having less sex isn't a bad thing or even indicative of anxiety. People are more educated about boundaries, consent and the physical and emotional risks involved with sex so maybe they're more selective. I distinctly remember very gross behaviour being considered normal when I was growing up in the late 00s and 2010's. Things like consent and *vast* age differences were so overlooked. Scarlett Johansson getting groped in the middle of the red carpet, Christina Aguilera getting called a piece of ass by gossip a reporter, Kirsten dunst kissing 31 yr old brad Pitt as a pre teen, Vanessa hudgens being publicly berated about her leaked phots . How is the change a bad thing? As for teenagers wanting to look older, this is once again not a new thing at all. Teen girls were experimenting with makeup as part of the coming of age process long before this decade. They have more information available so they get better at it quicker. Also, adults have weird ideas about what tweens and teens look like. The other day I watched a video about gen z (or alpha, it was one of the youngins) and people in the comments apparently thought the 13 yr old looked _9_ . At this point I think this discussion is the *"yoga pants vs flared leggings"* debate up to 11. Millenials just need to accept we're getting old😂😂. We are not even the second rising generation anymore --- gen alpha is here. Society keeps on changing with time and that's not necessarily good or bad, it just is.
This was the comment I was looking for because I feel the same. There’s nothing new about any of these topics, the times have changed so the way these themes manifest is different in every generation. But it’s still a repeated cycle rooted in the same concepts. Being a teen in the 2010s I idolized being a teen in the early 2000s often and experienced faux fomo from my inability to experience that era. Todays teens are no different. When you are teenager you get to see the nostalgia and lived experiences of other teen eras and it somewhat sets the tone for what you feel like yours should be and look like too. I will say the only major difference I feel like is def COVID and social medias rampant development and the effects on the teen psyche.
thank you this conversation feels like a huge echo chamber of people subconsciously mourning their lost youth & projecting that onto the next generation & i just wish more people could gain a twinge more of self awareness, like it very much gives boomer vibes & i don't understand how that's becoming such a collective opinion on modern youth so fast by people who aren't even that old how did everyone forget like it's weird literally none of its new aside from the way it's manifesting & some of its even good like having more sexual discipline 😭
now that i'm 21 and in college, i feel like i have access to more third spaces than i ever did as a teen. in part because i have more money to pass around due to my part-time job and in part because i stopped being so ashamed of loitering around without buying anything. me and my friends hang out in front of the fast food joint at the mall near our college, we squat around in parks gnawing on stale breadsticks and are content to sometimes travel up to an hour just to get to some event without an entry fee. we also occasionally go to bookstores just to thumb through their manga and fantasy sections or to tabletop shops just to check out dice (and maybe chat with fellow nerds while we're there). there have also been multiple occasions where i was able to drop to one of my friend's workplace and loiter around for cheap, and i have access to a public library where i'm able to go if i ever get tired of my family members (sometimes even literally, the librarians usually couldn't care less if you sleep there). i only wish that it was easier and cheaper to access these place nowadays, and i wish that teens were made aware of all the options they had
I'm 22 and i still feel myself like 16 or 17... But something really changed. I don't have a lot of friends anymore (mostly because I'm changing cities to live every couple of years), I don't feel like I could go to party again because I'm really tired of alcohol and don't want to listen to loud music... Oh now I feel like I'm 64 😥
I'm 19, and I feel like kids were trying to act grown in middle school than high school. By the time people were in high school, we all were doing our own things, being our own selves. It is so hard for me to figure out what makes 16-year-old me and 19 (almost 20) year old me different. Not because I was “trying” to act grown when I was 16, but because my identity and personality was nearly the same. Even the way I dress is nearly the same. I literally have clothing from middle school that I still wear. I do believe adults have to give people who are in their late teenage years some grace. Because there isn't a whole lot of teens (even preteen) things that you can do now. I specifically remember when I was a preteen listening to a fun pop song, but now everything about sex and drugs etc. Evens shows are like that now (13 Reasons Why and Euphoria) just to name some examples. There are no more coming to age shows anymore (Like Boy Meets World and Degrassi.) Even shows like Full House were relatable. I also feel like people have to consider take social media into account because where in an age where people would rather be on their phone than be social. As a kid who wasn't allowed to be on social media (besides RUclips) until I was 18, I find myself being into the middle when it comes to topics like these because for me, I am very antisocial and to myself, but at the same time when it comes to making friends or just socializing, I would rather do it in person than online like a lot of people my age.
I’m the same age as you, turning 20 in 2 months. At 16 I was already acting so grown, I couldn’t even tell who’s older looking side by side. I feel like I wasted my teen years acting like an adult and now that i’m an adult everything seems boring. Our generation truly were one of the firsts to be fucked over by social media
For me, the time a lot of my peers spend with each other is getting drunk and vaping etc. if you don’t really want to do that - like me - it’s a lot more difficult to make and hang out with friends cause if people are being social they usually hop to the nearest city and get black out drunk, this has become increasingly common over the last 5 or so years. Although this is just my experience from the central belt of Scotland so it probably does only apply to a very small area.
To all the teens reading, go roller skate. Go to a roller skating ring even if you can’t skate. They are such teen oriented and nice spaces. I went to one and a girl offered me a homemade business card for her deviant art account. They’re lovely.
Cars are a big part to blame for the lack of third spaces. Cities being built for cars means everything is further away and less accessible but especially for teenagers who cannot drive, means that they either have to rely on someone with a car (which has to be an adult) or public transport (mainly a US problem) which might not be accessible. No one is going to go somewhere if it's inconnvenient for them. I'm from the UK but where I live, my secondary school is close to shopping centre where I'll see kids hang out at KFC and McDonalds after school because it's literally a 5 minute walk from school plus the bus stop to take them home is nearby.
I hate it when adults are really mean to kids on the internet, because “they’re on the internet which is an adult space” … so you get a pass for calling them stupid?? They’re still kids, and if they’re on a site that’s not appropriate for their age, it’s probably because there is nothing in between it and preschool cartoons. Yes, teenagers (including me btw) are spending too much time on their phones, so are adults. Almost like phones are designed to be addictive.. Also I wish my area had somewhere to hang out, like a swimming pool or even a library. I’m usually too busy or tired to do anything except lie around after school, but I’d like to have the option.
That’s funny because earlier today, my friend and I came across a store that we used to love as teenagers (Claire’s) and it looked so empty and saddened me a lil bit. My friend asked me “why nobody care about this brand anymore it used to be the sh!t for us” and I just told her that teenagers don’t exist anymore, they just became little adults and don’t have a phase between childhood and adulthood. That’s really sad but ig social medias are a BIG part of this phenomenon.
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I feel like teenagers are not allowed to have an awkward phase anymore. When I spend time with my little son at a playground, I see plenty of very young girls, not even teenagers yet, who already look perfectly perfect. I mean, long silky hair, nice makeup, trendy clothes. It's not like I didn't try to look trendy and adult when I was a child, but I had an opportunity to learn from my own mistakes using makeup and combining clothes. I could wear, I don't know, a silly-looking violet T-shirt with smiling emojis and feel great. Now I see all those instagram mothers with their instagram daughters wearing crop tops at 10 years old and it just feels wrong.
Here’s my POV as a teenager. While I do have some of my awkward moments here and there. There is an immense pressure to be perfect. Mainly because of the influences of social media.
Also, anyone can whip out their phone and record and post you on social media at anytime without your consent. So you feel like you need to be perfect at all times. Kind at all times. Socially acceptable, at all times. Because one slip up and your on the internet with you entire future ruined
@@theddaeyeah, I always feel like people are watching. And they are. Funny thing is, I'm barely on social media. So I'm not doing it for the internet but now that I've entered college, I feel the need to dress the way other girls are dressing and even the people close to me said I should start wearing more crop tops and shorts. Nowadays people also make friends based on aesthetics so it's like I'm also trying to fit in somewhere since I don't have any friends here either.
literally what i was days ago and that true asf
In combination with the feeling of not being allowed because of social media, fear of missing out, etc. They also have the added advantage of not really having to go through an awkward phase because the answers are all at their finger tips. There's not much exploration to be had to try to fit into the mainstream, they can just Google or watch a RUclips tutorial. No awkward "first time trying eyeliner." They've got step by step guides for everything without ever needing to talk to their parent or I remember trying to figure makeup out from library books + trial & error
Yeah. I feel like gen z (or rather the older half of gen z) was the last generation to experience tween hood. When I was in middle school, though I thought some of the girls who went at my school looked "super cool" at the time, kinda looked silly, looking back. Our selfies were cringy, we said dumb sounding stuff online, our clothes were "childish" and looked like something out of a Disney channel show, our make up looked atrocious, and our hair was dyed and styled in bizarre ways. But you know what? We had fun, and though peer pressure and social media already existed, it wasn't like it was today. I think that being a tween in the early 2010s, it was like a transition period between the different culture shifts, if that makes sense, since social media was becoming more and more prominent in our lives throughout the 2010s. It was when Claire's and Justice were still kinda popular, though maybe not in the same way it was in the 2000s, but certain things that were considered normal for our age were starting to be deemed as "too childish" for 12 year olds, and some girls wanted to feel a lot more adult.
Adults don’t allow kids to be kids.
At least once a week there’s a viral quote tweet of a person over the age of 25 making fun of kids… being normal kids.
yes! its so annoying when you see people complaining about kids growing up too fast and looking like theyre adults, when the same people will turn around and make fun of kids just having fun and being kids. like what are they supposed to do???
Or my pet peeve when adults over 35 say that their generation looked older because "they were more mature than kids today". I can't speak for all of gen z, but for me, that put more pressure on me to act and dress more mature when I was a teen.
Older generations always try to change their criticisms depending on the situation. They'll complain that kids grow up too fast one minute and then say that kids aren't growing fast enough in another, whenever they're trying to feel superior. You can't win.
@@mynameisreallycool1 honestly I think the pressure to do that as a teen myself is more in social media. Nowadays we are watching shows like euphoria or Riverdale with literal adults portraying teens. Teenage girls feel like they have to look like Alexia Demie (a 30 year old grown woman).
it's not like back in the Hannah Montana days where you had little Miley portraying someone of her actual age
but wdym by making fun of kids for being kids. I mean I haven't seen that in my experience that's why I wanna ask for examples
@@arnau6020On point.
Adults have always rolled their eyes at teens for their interests (Twilight comes to mind more prominently to me), or their behaviors, but nowadays medias aimed at teens are nearly non-existent- It's either for children, adults, or in rare cases, it's all-ages. Or if teen medias exist, the way people obtain their entertainment nowadays makes them very easy to dismiss or miss entirely. The youth doesn't watch TV or subscribe to age-appropriate magazines anymore. They go on social medias, where they're mingled with adults constantly.
Most teens nowadays are just mini adults. Like, I can’t tell if one is 16 or 21 from a visual perspective.
Yea look like adults but a lot of them still think like children lol
I’m 19 but constantly get mistaken for 16 because I wear jeans and t shirts and not glam clothing lol
🚔 🚔🚔
@@caitlingillsameT^T
@@caitlingill I feel you. I'm 21 and majority of people I meet think I'm in high school.
I'm 19, on my last teenage years. I feel like todays teenage youth is maturing rapidly because the adults have been rushing us to grow up by forcing adult responsibilities on us, plus the adults are mostly judging than helping today's youth. And so much crazy stuff is happening outside to the point. Kids are lucky enough to make it back home safely
Believe me, we want you to stay kids and not grow up until age 25 but alas Regan fucked the world up in the 1980s and made it impossible for young people to suceed and be financially independent thus creating hustle culture.
Exactly, what adult responsibilities? The past two generations have had the least adult responsibilities. I was a latch key kid and still, all I was expected to do was the dishes and take the meat out of the freezer. Barely cleaned my room. My kid gets chofered everywhere and only is expected to do dishes on occasion and clean their room as well. This is the most spoiled generation yet
@@jibarabicha4853 Enabled is the word you mean, and guess who enabled them? BOOMERS
@@jibarabicha4853you sound like you were a spoiled kid. My siblings and I were expected to clean the entire house (including washing inside and outside the fridge and other random things) mow the lawn, cut wood for fire, clean out the car we didn’t drive, do compost recycling and garbage, just to name a few and we lived in a small suburban house
The adult responsibility part is so true. I also feel like being a black teen, POC parents (not all but a lot) want the kid to deal with all this shit but then whenever they say they struggling to the point they are depressed they are told “Your not depressed”
As a teen myself, the main two reasons for the lack of socialization I've observed is that:
1) Teens (especially girls) don't go out much because every third space is filled with creeps. Maybe it's because I live in a big city, but we can't go out to a simple park or movie theater without being catcalled or groped. Libraries are basically non-existent, and the only things most teens read nowadays (if they read at all) are colleen hoover-esque romance novels.
2) Parents are stricter on teens than ever before. I think it's more prevalent where I live (Asia) but teens are shovelled from school to academies to home to school. We're not let out anywhere either, because it'll affect our studies. That's why most of us socialize through social media.
About fashion, where I live you're supposed to dress like a grown woman the moment you're going through puberty. There's absolutely ZERO brands for teen wear because it just doesn't sell. Besides, seeing all the influencers on social media, everyone wants to dress like them in order to look "pretty" and "grown up".
1 is so true
the last one is so real! if you don't dress 'normal' you're generally not accepted by most people or you get weird looks
@@coralovesbean ikr!! even dressing a bit out of the norm gets u so many dirty looks. I went to a school event dressed in gothic lolita and everyone (even my friends!) ignored me
@@internetdistress8192
Oh that’s cool! If you’re happy with wearing lolita you should do it, even if others give you weird looks.
Yes it’s true parents today are way more strict than they were in the past that’s crime back 50 years ago was higher because there was no strict parents. And teens today are more well behaved.
As a 15 year old this is very true. When it comes to socializing I can tell it's harder for some people. Personally me and my friends hang out at Starbucks, the mall, and we plan to go to the library to study. And also for the not going out part, for a certain amount of us it's not wanting to go out but for the other half it's our parents. They see the dumb teens on social media and automatically assume it's all teens. So social media not only gets to us but our parents as well.
All teenagers are dumb honestly, they just don’t do the same things. In a few years, you’ll cringe at your younger self and it’ll be normal.
Felt. I’m 17 with strict parents. They never let me go anywhere until now when I can drive.
@@bugsbunni4200 I don't have strict parents but I js wanted to put the idea out there. And I'm so sorry
Honestly!!
as a 16 yr old from nyc i have to agree. i cant speak for how it is in other states/places but here there is so much anxiety among parents its insane. despite living in a very safe area, since the news is everywhere/so oversaturated, parents see all the bad stuff and assume it happens more often than it does so they put all these restrictions on their kids. my parents are more strict about school than going out so i dont have to deal with it as much but i have some friends who’ve never even gone on a bus before because their parents are scared something will happen. i get the logic but at that point that kid is gonna have 10x more trouble when they’re forced to be independent
Teen/youth culture and subcultures are still there, but it’s certainly quieter than it was in the past. I was a teen in the late 2010s (I’m 21), my mom was a teen in the early/mid 80s (MTV, breakfast club, etc) she graduated high school in 1985.
It’s imo, it’s because it’s the death of monoculture. Nobody’s watching the same things all at the same time. Nobody’s listening to the same stuff either. Everyone has their own little niche.
I just turned 20 and I couldn’t agree more. But when I was a teenager those teen medias were already disappearing, we barely had anything everybody wanted to be grown GROWN.
I have to agree with this. I also find it kinda weird that there really isn’t a lot of places that are made for teens/teenagers online kinda? Or even just kids like there used to be a lot of online spaces for younger people like games or chatrooms or fandom spaces are either are just blended into social media (that gets more similar over time) or discord/live-streaming over idk, playing club penguin/RuneScape or spaces like that. A lot of the websites and places I used to go to as a kid/teen online get shut down, so a lot of individual niches that used to have community and social aspects to them are more so just aesthetic choices personally rather than subcultures
you are all so right in my opinion, i think that everything is so individualized now that it’s hard to find a community and commit to it without feeling like you’re abandoning everything else about you. i think newer generations don’t like to be inside of a box.
You make a really good point. I have a love / hate relationship with that. I love the freedom to be individual but also hate that it seems impossible to find people to connect with and things to talk about. There's just constant different news and everyone follows such different things.
The problem is that your perception is based on your experiences, which have never included a world in which youth culture is really a driving force, so in your mind of course it's still there but it's like telling someone from 300 years ago that sugar is still important, like, yeah kinda we eat it every day, but in the 1700s shit was so expensive it could be used as currency, pretty sure they fought wars over the stuff, it's just not the same thing. Our generation actually doesn't have any specific youth culture, the closest thing would genuinely be tiktok culture but that's again not defined by age as much as use of an app. I think you're right about the death of monoculture driving this loss of youth culture though, declining birth rates are probably contributing too (youth culture pretty much peaked with the baby boom), the fact is there are just way fucking less of us and our ability to control what media we consume and what information we're exposed to and what people we interact with is unprecedented, I mean it's hard to be a united cultural force when you don't need to leave the house to make friends or meet like minded people your own age, they don't even have to live in the same area so your ability to resist social pressure to conform to one belief or another is higher without you having to put half as much effort in, there are no stakes anymore. You had to really work to be a subculture kid in the 80s because you relied on that social identity to form community and have friends and without those you literally had nothing, if you didn't fit in the mainstream you had to fit in with the weirdos to survive. Now fitting in barely even exists anymore and no one really cares that much whether you perfectly meet the criteria to belong to a particular group, in fact the list of criteria itself is becoming smaller and smaller, groups are more amorphous and flexible and the edges are blurred, nothing is really important to today's youth specifically. The things that are important to us are important to most people. "Youth" subculture has become just subculture.
I’m 24 and feel more like a teen than the teens I see everyday💀
same i’m 20 and feel more teen now than i did at 18
Same here, being 21 and seemed more boyish and rebel compared to 18 year old me 3 years ago wkwwkwkkw
Lol same age and feeling
This is actually a new trend known as extended adolescence
Yeah I’m 27 and I just feel like a kid who somehow survived to adulthood. But at least I have money to spend on those cute clothes I was too shy to wear when I was an actual teen and I can wear them to the pub and get drunk with other ‘kids’ wrestling with the same realisation 😅
I’m 16 and this is 100% true, I ended up deleting both TikTok and instagram because it’s literally turning into an actual addiction for teens now a days.
I'm trying to do this too but I feel like I'm actually getting addicted, I downloaded the app because I saw all my peers doing it so I felt like I had to, and plus I don't really like tik tok I just have it to have it. Lol
I'm 16 and I've done the same thing a couple of months back. Sense then i feel like at least 15% of the social pressure to be a certain way, Has been lifted.
I’m 19 I never downloaded tik tok I always thought it was toxic but now insta is becoming toxic and draining every comment I see is hateful towards everyone racist anti lgbtq bullying kids I saw one post of this little boy crying because his grandma died and people was saying womp womp and we don’t care I want to delete it but I have online friends I text on there
I read Instagram to cheer people and watch mental health education and philosophy and read history,I think it depends how you use it and can still read books in real life instead of gadgets and I balance both time for Doing real life non-digital activities and time for scrolling instagram.If you use it for validation,then it is likely you become addicted.I don't use it for validation.I use it to read facts of posts about mental health from professionals and learning to make crafts when making homemade diys and learning my skill on tutorials of art I watch in videos and still know how to balance time for it
Same
As a 16 year old girl in the US (Florida), I can see how "tween" culture is disappearing around me. I was very different from the 12 year olds now days when I was 12, and that wasn't even long ago. Kids in elementary school are vaping now and it's crazy to me. There really is no in-between awkward phase for kids now either. And as for the third spaces, my third spaces and a lot of other people's third spaces in my age group are literally just random parking lots where we all go to smoke weed lol. I'm 7 months clean from pills & shit like that, and when I was in rehab there were so many young girls (ages 10-14) addicted to so much bad shit because it's romanticized in media now, plus there's barely anything to do as a developing young person!!!
Damn that sounds more interesting than anything I do. Sometimes I feel like a ginormous square holy shit😭😭
Same but I live in the city so over here is even worse.
Congrats dude, that’s a big win on being clean like REALLY BIG!
Like I’m so proud dude.
Hope you have a great day!
@@Popthebop thanks man. 8 months strong as of now 🔥
@@charrreb No prob, hope life is easy on you
I think the Pandemic is a huge reasons for this. A lot of teens lost their teen hood during this time (proms or homecomings (either canceled or virtual), remote school, graduation, etc.) between 2020-2021 maybe early 2022. I was a teen in the early 2010s and I've notice a lot of teens today romatizing that era already. Like I said, I think the pandemic took away their teen years away and started to romantize mine because they didn't fully experience teenhood if that makes sense.
Like when I saw a tiktok of a girl saying "ugh to be a teen in 2014" I was like what? Then realized she was 16-17 so the poor kid was around 12-13 years old when the Pandemic happened and I couldn't imagine spending the majority of your teen years stuck inside and doing remote school work.
As someone who was also a teen in 2014, the thought of hearing teenagers say that they wish to be a teenager in 2014 is kind of funny, though obviously understandable, given the context. It's still making me feel old though. Lol
YES the pandemic has played such a huge part in all of this
damn. that's a really good point. i was a young teen in the early 2010s and i hadn't even thought about that angle. no wonder The Kids TM romanticize what we had.
Right cus I feel like it’s just like it’s so depressing to just be alive even as a teen. Like my life is so fucking boring and depressing. Nothing is new anymore just school and home.
Damn, I reeeaaallyyy feel so sorry for these teens that had the pandemic steal their teenhoods.
The pandemic already sucked for me, being a young adult and all, I can't imagine how much it sucked for them. To have spent my teen years locked up at home 24/7 with my family and terrible news and student duties all the time,would have been unthinkable, I would probably have exploded or something, just impossible.
It’s just hard sometimes because we’re made fun of for going through awkward phases or acting our ages and we’re told to grow up but when we do it’s a problem it’s like there’s no winning
I hated the teenage phase , like i was old enoght to be getting responsabilities after one another and be expected to not be childlish anymore and mature but at the same time i was too Young and my autonomy and feeling got invalidated and i only was expected to do chores, help my parents and school anything else was a distraction...
@@lilpretzel5629 exactly and I feel like people don’t understand that we have pressure to grow up but to act our age at the same time it just makes everything so much harder
@@lilpretzel5629 and on top of all that we’re constantly getting judged by not only people in our lives but random strangers too like the “when I was their age” thing like I constantly feel like random adults are always judging me for no reason
@@HaleyAkinwande That’s the most relatable thing I’ve heard someone say here!!
who's making fun of you for acting your age but other teens...?
Theres a lot of pressure and bullying too, like you cant dress the way you actually want because people will bully the hell out of you, or if you do its like there is only ONE way and if you do it wrong youre automatically not a part of that group or something.
it has always been that way though? kids have always bullied other kids for how they dress i might be twenty two but i still remember high school
@@Najeetatika To some degree yes. I do think however that it's gotten worse and more pervasive. With teens/tweens constantly consuming social media and images of 20 something inluencers (often wearing more revealing styles) they feel way more pressure to act and dress like a young adult. And as for bullying cyberbullying has become huge. It used to just be like a kid wears something "uncool" at school and other kids talk about them/bully them at/after school but now there's no escape cuz kids can be bullied 24/7. They can share your ig posts in a private group chat and make fun of you that way or make a whole account making fun of you. Also you mention you're 22. I'm 23. when we were teens was when this was all starting so ofc you'll think highschool was always like this. its not like you're a different generation
@@Najeetatikaright? Lol bullying is universal and timeless.
I was a band director and can confirm with current middle school kids and at the last school (that I quit in the dead of night booo 🖕🏻💩), the bullying is horrendous.
That last school it was petty and it could just be about clothing. That community was entitled with money and attitude. I heard those exact comments about if you weren’t wearing the right shoes, for example.
At the previous job, I had an admin talk to me about two girls. To make sure they were separate. I was surprised to learn one was bullying the other at lunch (she was bright, perky, showed leadership qualities and played very well!), but wouldn’t dare pull that shit in my band class. Wow.
It goes on at school, it goes on during the off hours on the phones. That’s a big difference with this generation. They can be shamed publicly and privately, in person and on public forums of large digital audiences with posts or snaps or whatever that could go viral.
My district had it in the county rule book that they would go after cyber bullying. I don’t think they had the man power to do so!! It’s crazy.
@@s.severn social media existed when i was in high school? we had facebook instagram twitter hell i think tiktok had just popped up too im gen z im just apart of the slight older part and cyber bullying was going on with millennials l too they just had aol myspace and chat forums
As a teenager, I feel like we as a generation have been robbed of the traditional teenage experience. This is supposed to be a time of experimentation and socialization, but most of us have strict parents who won’t even let us meet our friends. Actually, there’s nowhere for us to hang out in the first place. I wasn’t alive in the 80s-90s era, but from what I’ve gathered there is a lot more pressure on us to behave as mature adults compared to past generations. It’s sad to me.
(Edit: In addition, I really feel like teenagers of my time are pressured to look more homogenous. Even across different styles/"cores" there is a look they all have in common. I don't know how to explain it really.)
@@creepycrybabyxoxo Please don’t. Even though we’re not growing up in an ideal world, there’s still so much to live for. I know it sucks. Hang in there, okay?
@@creepycrybabyxoxowhy don’t you nut up to it then, and stop spamming the same comment under every single goddamn comment? i simply moved on the first time i saw one you wrote, but after seeing so many direct copies of it under various comments, this is obviously like baiting. shut the fuck up and have some respect for those actually struggling with mental health issues you troglodyte
@@creepycrybabyxoxogirl im way older than u, trust me, ur still very young, enjoy ur teenhood. I remember crying when i was 15 and making a reddit post which read like "im turning 16 tomorrow im really sad." We all been through it lol dw
don't@@creepycrybabyxoxo
@@mevilman1069 why
Yo, teenager here! The decline of teen culture is super damaging. I've been a Hot Topic girlie since I was nine, and I was super happy about it! I loved all the graphic tees and dorky Invader Zim hats. By middle school, I'd discovered aesthetics, and I was obsessed. By thirteen, I was wearing thigh highs and mini skirts on the daily. I got majorly groomed. I was lucky enough to have snapped out of it before anything got really bad, but as adulthood quickly approaches for me, I can't bring myself to dress that way anymore. I can only wear baggy clothes because I'm hyperaware that people see teens as adults, or in other words, free real estate. The disappearance of teen-hood is so dangerous in the predatory world we live in.
That fact scares the heck out of me like nothing else.
drop the act we all know your like a 30 year old women bc ain't no way💀
you caught me i'm a man umu@@notdeadjustxpired
@@notdeadjustxpiredngl I read “hot topic” thinking who tf goes there anymore but I think the majority of it is legit
@@notdeadjustxpiredwtf is ur problem
As a 16 year old, I agree that there has been a lack of third spaces. Just yesterday, I was talking with my friend on how there are barely any places for us to hang out now, especially without spending money.
Also, back when I was a tween, I really felt the lack of media for that age group. I was too old to watch kids shows, but too young to watch those “teen dramas”. As a result I just shifted to anime and manga cause I felt like it was the only thing out there for me at the time.
Even now, as a teenager, I still feel like there needs to be more relatable modern (Gen Z focused) teen media. Sure we have shows like Europhia, but that’s mostly for young adults. I found a few good shows that I enjoyed and could more so relate to, but many people my age are just watching young adult shows. Like, do writers know they can set these places in collage? Because I’m genuinely curious why all these crazy stories gotta happen in highschool. It’s ridiculous.
I think they aren’t put in an college setting bc if it’s college then it’s not like they’re forced to be there, yk? I know it’s vulgar for Highschool but it makes more sense imo, because some people are really vulgar in Highschool, but I understand.
And for the film Industry to market Euphoria for "teens and young adults" is sickening. Like, that show has adults who play minors having explicit sex scenes and shit like that. People of that age shouldn't strive to be having sex, I mean it's fun as long as your safe and both consenting because it's gonna happen regardless, but seriously teens should be striving to build their character and personalities, figuring out who they are. I'm 19, and I'm JUST doing that after dealing Instagram because my obsessions got me caught up into having a stalker. All those years I wasted. For what? Just to remember trauma and abuse and be sad all the time.
girl i did not care
as a tween i would go home and watch odd squad jus bc i could and no one could tell me other wise😭
@@Just_in_case_i_die..._definitely. It is very sickening and shocking
I'm 16 as well and I 100% agree with your comment about Tv shows form of representation. Some of the serious topics or hard transitioning periods can be put in college. I can't speak for everyone, but Highschool is not as freeing as some shows portray it to be.
I’m 17 and was literally just talking about this with my friends the other day. It’s really crazy.
I think this is what’s causing my ADHD paralysis, I get so stuck in thought and so afraid of being seen as competition out in the real world when I’m jus tryna do my thing, I can barely get up from bed without a break down, I hate it sm but I’m gonna look for some real help yeah
in some places it’s jus how it goes and they don’t pay attention age and child labor shi but it feels like such a fever dream seeing 17 year old a BEING KICKED OUT, like it mind boggles me cuz that’s how I was raped and like f, parents are supposed to be angles above all, and this world has jus torn everyone and everything apart
@@aribasquezO I’m not from most countries I’m from America.
@@bugsbunni4200I’m not even from america and 17 is a kid. She’s a weirdo anyone under 18 is a legal CHILD.
@@aribasquezOwrong. In most countries 17 year olds are in their final years of high school/education and still living with their PARENTS. Get your old hag ass out of herr
I agree, you don't really don't see a lot of teenagers outside anymore. The only places where you could find them are either a school, campus, park, university or a college.
Inflation is making this difficult as well for both teens and adults. I am a 21 year old with a baby and going out anywhere has been hard. I can count the times I have gone out on one hand this year. Breathe if you can relate
As a 25 year old, there sadly isn’t very many places for teens to hang out anymore. When I was a teenager my friends would go to the mall or the bowling alley or the movie theater. Lots of those things are just dead or closed now. Plus you need money for those things which is hard esp. bc of the recession. There is also social media that’s getting in the way of that which I personally feel like is killing social spaces for teens and even kids.
@@emilynam6084i personally don't go out but I've seen photos of signs in malls or just public spaces that teenagers can't go alone at all times.
@@heiext Yeah, living in the time we’re in now I don’t think it would be safe, they’re would have to be some type of adult supervision, even if it’s they’re an aunt or something!
@@valeriagonzalez8321
Not to mention laws limiting how many teens can be in one area! I heard it to prevent gang violence or something....
Public libraries are a great third space for teens today as a lot of librarians design teen spaces and teen programming like crafting, gaming, and even book clubs exclusively for teenagers and even tweens. It’s a great place for them to socialize and not have to spend money
teenage sexual activity is definitely at an all time low because NOBODY TALKS TO EACH OTHER. it’s so hard to just date someone as well, because so many people aren’t brave enough to make a move
That’s good that teen sexual activity is low they don’t need it look what happen in the past look how bad it was and teens today are more mature and well behaved. Teens in the past were way worse and wild than what they are today because of sexual activities.
@@albihysenaj5997 agreed!!!!!
All time low would be a good thing but idk what world u live in where it’s “low”. So many kids experience heartbreak, soul ties, become trifling, lose their ability to pairbond, give up on love, drama, already cheating, spreading diseases, like bro….
I’m a teen and already despise the idea of dating bc of how lustful and casual it is.
@@luccijayr5804 it's still statistically lower than what our parents their parents were experiencing sexually.
I think it’s also important to notice that I’ve seen more teens online with depression and insecurities. Many say that they’re introverts, is just that what’s popular on social media is being an extrovert
I feel like teenagers don’t exist anymore because kids lose their innocence so young.
Because of the internet and social media, kids and teens are exposed to a lot of mature content.
Teenagers have always had the conflict of wanting to be seen and treated as an adult, but are treated like a child because they are still young and developing.
I have also noticed that kids and teens now have even more of a desire to grow up, work etc which I understand, but is kinda sad.
I think whatever age you are, it’s better to just embrace it and enjoy it.
You’re only a teen for a while, so enjoy your youth and don’t waste it away wishing you were older.
Being an adult isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Most adults I know are tired and stressed and miss the simplicity of the life they had when they were younger.
Yes I hope they try and enjoy the time they have now when they’re young as much as they can even if they’re struggling (because when you’re in college on your own you may not have your parents, the same community, or all that time like you think you do :( )
You said this so perfectly. Thank you
and probably broke as shit because the economy fucking sucks
While I agree that teenagers should enjoy this life stage and not be forced to grow up so quickly, I disagree with your last point.
Being an adult does not suck. I get it, having to pay bills and worry about all this little stuff you don't have to when you were younger is annoying. But you have freedom.
Every life stage comes with its merits and downfalls and imho they're all equal. This kind of talking made me want to me be am adult even more when I was a teen. It's part of being a teenager to want to be older and there's nothing wrong with it. This talking down to teenagers "because it will get worse" just incentives it even more.
@@aribasquezOsounds like a you problem. Adulthood is fun for many. Misery loves company it seems
i worked as a starbucks barista at a target and when i tell you target is basically the mall now, it really is. parents drop off their kids at target and they spend hours there and meet up with friends, go to starbucks, shop, skate and hang out in the parking lot, etc. there's also other shopping places nearby or next door like five below, books a million, game stop, and basically the same kinda shops you would see at a mall lol. i think third places have shifted from what they were before to what they are now to accommodate modern times. but yes, social media and the internet have definitely made a difference on how connected we are as people in general. hence the downfall of friendships, but that's another topic.
as an ex target employee, this!!!
i couldn't agree more & as someone who actually interacts with teens (not in a creepy way i work at a family owned winery where local teens also work) we all often share what we do on our time off & none of them are sitting at home depressed online constantly... i think a lot of adults think because the spaces they had as a teen are no longer around there now just aren't any teen spaces, when that's simply not at all the case target, thrift shops, coffee shops & places like barnes & noble all are huge hangouts for teens, also if anything with the amount of clothing selection there is online now their range of appropriate options is actually way bigger than its ever been , teens dressing more scandalously i think has much more to do with teen appropriate media being shit, which actually comes from the issues that caused the writers strike, it's not because justice fell out of fashion lol, it's that teens in the past looked to actual teen stars for style inspiration because they like the media they produced, there's no longer good movies for teens that's the one part i really agree with, but that kinda goes for all shows & movies now, they're mostly shit sadly... but there's so many clothing companies that cater to modest fashion, also the trend cycle has been basically broken by social media so it's def not because being super sexy is suddenly the thing, that's always been a thing, the biggest difference is less prominent teen stars that actually have quality work, as for teen spaces & fashion that very much isn't a issue in the way the video is framing it in my opinion...
Strip malls and those U shaped complexes with many stores are all that is built. I miss the mall, you couldn't drive up to just the store you wanted except the big stores on the corner, but the food court was fun and inside was designed to look nice and at my mall we had an indoor playground for little kids and then a big fountain that teens gathered by and threw coins into and they also had plants and trees gathered about. The strip malls only have pavement and sometimes a sad looking tiny tree.
The mall by me literally banned tweens/teenagers on Fridays and Saturdays past 5pm. Theres a sign at each door saying minors need an adult with them Friday and Saturday nights. Part of this I think is because alot of them would bring bikes into the mall, try and make viral tiktoks by interviewing people or screaming (“as a social experiment.”) And it did feel like a lot of unsupervised children in one concentrated area. But I fear that now they have nowhere to go on Fridays or Saturdays. And if anything the malls probably the safest place they can hang out. I can’t think of any other place thats walkable, indoors, and they can freely spend $5-$10 on a quick snack or dinner. :( but also like dont run full speed down a crowded mall screaming???¿¿
@@isarme12397 that just seems like a lazy way to deal with the problem. My target would also kick out teens that would ride the store bicycles throughout the store or try to film or harass other people. But that’s what you gotta do. Just kick out the people that deserve to be kicked out, not everyone is a problem.
I'm a teenager and one reason why I don't go out is because I'm terrified, not just socially, the outside world is scary. People get attacked all the time for breathing a certain way. I think back then it was safer to be out an socialize but now you can't even go to Walmart without being scared of getting shot
This is such a valid fear too, i was a teenager pre covid I felt like it was a lot safer to do things out and abt then
It wasn't actually any safer to go outside when I was a kid. It's just now days media has hyper fixated on the dangers for clicks and views, so it looks a lot worse than it was back in the '90s. Ignorance was bliss.
@@gamana6179there wasn't as much mass shootings though or people wanting to brandish their guns in public places. There were some but it didn't seem constant or targeting places where children were. In my home state which is very red and gunfriendly and big on hunting, I didn't see many people wearing gun holsters out to normal community activities til about 2016 when Trump came into office. Before then some people had rifles on a gun rack on their pickup but they didn't feel the need to bring guns into grocery store or malls or to parades.
That you could see. I live in a conceal and carry state. There were a lot more than you remember, and the internet probably is the reason for more gun carriers being public about it, too. There is more awareness now than there was, and more kids with guns. That is the big difference. @@jamiewilson1532
@@gamana6179 I think there's truth to both points. There was still kidnapping etc. 20 years ago, but media has made us all focused on what "could" happen. I think it's also true that gun violence and mass shootings have increased sharply since 2000. The pandemic didn't help make people safe in public either.
I’m 17, and I often feel so unconnected with my peers. At school if there is free time everyone just stares at their screens. I’ve struggled to make friends, and that’s partly due to having two years of my high school career taken by COVID, but the rise of technology really has made it harder to communicate with others in person. At least for me, as a still developing teenager it has been difficult.
🤓🤓🤓🤓
@@notdeadjustxpiredi have aids
Same here 🫂. I feel like both COVID and the internet have taken away a concerning amount of my social skills. Only now I'm trying to rebuild such. The world nowadays just doesn't revolve around socialising anymore since everyone's on their phones scrolling.
@@notdeadjustxpiredhow are you commenting this on a video essay. the whole point is to talk in detail
@@Jemlalala bruv really asked me how i just commented an emoji on some video 🤓
As a 15 yr old social media definitely plays a role in why we can't just be teens anymore but I hate the fact that adults make it seem like "SOCIAL MEDIA IS THE PROBLEM" and that's just that. The reality is that there's virtually no place for teens to hang AND genuinely enjoy themselves without spending $50 or more, most teens don't have jobs or any steady stream of income, we can't get places without our parents, and because of urbanization most of us live on the opposite side of town from our friends. Getting together with your friends just once a month is a grand achievement in this day and age.
do you feel like if you proposed going and hanging out with your friends in a third space like a mall, they'd say yes? like do teens/tweens today even wanna socialize face-to-face? I'm just asking out of genuine curiosity bc I'm almost 23 so I guess older gen z, yet it feels like the differences between people my age and people only 8 years younger are SO big
@@sfyau0529 Of course, I can't speak for everyone in my age range, but me and my friends want to hang out all the time and usually the biggest factor holding us back is the fact that we have no money or no ride
@@sfyau0529as a 16 year old, yes. I really want to spend time with my friends organically and also meet new teens irl but even if we plan to go to malls its out of our reach because neither do we have to money nor the transportation. I mean we use public transportation but it really gets tiring using it all the time to just get to one place. I really wish there was a place for teens to meet other teens where we just had to bring ourselves.
@megchuu5170 you can't ask your parents for a ride? That's how we did it when I was your age (I'm 39 now) before getting a drivers license. What's changed since then?
@@trueblueclueparents are overworked and spending more hrs in the workplace to meet the rising, insufferable costs of living
I just realized there’s No more Teen Choice Award in 2020s😭
They should bring it back!!!
@@caitlingillYeah I miss the Teen Choice Awards!
Same, it's like what happened to the TCA's ?? They should've dropped the Grammys b4 dropping the TCA's..!! The Grammys are boring & worthless.
@@dashiajames1882 the TCAs are actually fun and trendy, the Grammy’s are losing their worth each year and becoming stale, old-fashioned and boring
@@caitlingill: That's what I mean..!!
This is very true. As a 14 year old I feel like the adults don’t want me going anywhere but want me to stay out of the way. They don’t me here, like my presence is an annoyance. I understand, teenagers are annoying sometimes but, we’re kid, just older kids who are gonna be adults. We can’t start acting like adults but we can’t be to childish. Like, I feel like no one wants teenagers anywhere. Not our parents, not our schools, not our city and definitely not the government. What are we supposed to do. We can’t just become 12 to 20 overnight.
Edit: All of the replies are so kind and I gives me some sort of solace knowing others feel the same way I do.
"I feel like the adults don’t want me going anywhere but want me to stay out of the way" YES THIS IS IT. I'm 17 and just like you said it feels like we're a nuisance. I hate the contradiction of "teens are going thru puberty and hormone changes so they're going to be acting different" to then get hit with "why are you acting different?" I legit feel like he family members who used to worship me just don't like me anymore. If i had a concern at 11 it was treated like a real problem but if I have one now? I'm being sensitive and over dramatic.
I understand this soooo much. Like you want us to look like children but act like adults? In school all i hear is your in high school now or grow up. Or this is not middle school. I’m 14 so i’m a freshman. So like what do they expect? At the end of the day we’re just a bunch of kids trying to figure out who we are and eventually the world needs to except this at some point.
@@princesszayna_even though I’m 19 and I graduated last year I can relate my mom use to say this to me all the time even when I was in 9 grade like your 15 its time to grow up your not a child anymore like mom I was 15 I’m not 30
As a 13 year old, this is exactly it. Like, I'm too young to know that I'm gay, but too old to watch one series, too young to watch i different one. I really don't get it.
Honestly this is exactly how it felt at 14
I'm 17, and honestly, I think most of us (including myself) just don't really care anymore. Like why should I? All the adults in my life tell me the world is doomed and my generation is fucked, and most people that surround us are painfully pessimistic and cynical, so most of us just don't really care to go out and try.
We are just going through the crisis. Humanity will rise🌟 & you will be there for it 💗 Keep your Heart Open and Flexible.
Not a new feeling this one, reminds me of Daria a lot.
@@aribasquezOno she is not. She is legally a child in ALL countries. Your scutch a freak and it’s obvious from your multiple comments in this section your miserable and hate your life. Don’t you dare try to rush others to grow up. She is a teenager and a child at that. Everyone under 18 is a kid and that’s coming from someone living in Europe. Your a weirdo. Go be miserable elsewhere
@@aribasquezOhuh!?????
@@aribasquezOthe brain doesn't develop fully until 25. Your statement is so weird.
There's also this uproar of teens and young adults coming forward to talk about how lonely they are and how loneliness is becoming too intense to bare and it stems from a mixture of social media, lack of third spaces, and how expensive everything is. We're doing nearly a 360 where the workforce is comprised of mostly teens because we cant afford anything and we have no where else to be.
As a 15 year old, sometimes it feels really hard to be a kid. Adults and a lot of my peers tell me to stop acting like a kid or that I'm too childish (when I'm literally an actual kid???). the best thing that I could've done for myself was to stop listening to them and continue living my life as a kid and have friends who don't tell me that I'm "too childish".
@offended_turtle2328
I can relate as a Gen Zer
It’s so annoying being bullied for being different 🙄
As a 21 year old, my teenage years really sucked. I was the quiet kid in the corner that didn’t have too many friends with a dysfunctional family. In 8th grade I was lucky to find my best friend who was a person like me and made a close friend group from that. After high school socializing became pretty difficult and I wish there were more places for me to make friends.
I feel you
Omg me too. This was my exact experience
Im 20 and was pretty similar. The bug difference is that I’d make friends then push them away (maybe low self esteem or insecurity caused this).
I know many people in my high school hung out outside of school but I have pretty much never been to a 3rd space to hangout
yea as an adult going out and making friends has to be a conscious choice. Like apart from work friends (which I’ve never really had) you have to actively seek out groups of people who enjoy the same things you do in the hopes that you click with some of them enough to hang out outside of that activity. It can be really hard to find the time or to find the right activity to join.
I am european and our third space is mostly the old town, there are many cute cafes, bars, stores, and we have a promenade next to a river which is a place people often go
I was thinking about the same thing!!! I moved to Australia as an adult and not seeing townsquares and places like that is so sad sometimes... They'll have entires suburbs made up of just houses and maybe a train station 😩 no wonder everyone is at either malls or just at home all the time
that sounds nice
the old town: yes
suburbs: no
train station: (:, especially as an american where trains are lackluster, sometimes non existent in most cities @@luraymoondust
As someone who grew up with an older sister from the 2000s when she was a teen, it looked very exciting to be a teen her age, I remember how exciting activities like going to the mall were for her and to me and even thinking “I can’t wait to do that when I’m a teen” I think my teen years weren’t entirely as hyped as I thought were looking back (besides mental health).
Now I think of going to the mall as a chore, kind of boring, and depressing because there’s no fun to them now, they’re not the same. I think I still had some sense of community for a little bit but late high school it felt a lot like what you described kind of just being inside and also (little interest/action towards sex BECAUSE I’m inside and on my phone). The pandemic could also be a hugeee reason for this and what you’re talking abt in the video and just overconsumption?
I'm planning on ☠ like a week before my 15th birthday next year, fuck growing up, I'm gonna be a little girl forever
@@creepycrybabyxoxoGive adulthood a try before you decide you don't want to experience it. My life improved a lot once I was in control of more aspects of my life
@@notascottishgirl2543 but what's the point of life without being a kid when nothing will be happy anymore and you won't be adored anymore
@@creepycrybabyxoxo What makes you think nothing will be happy anymore once you're no longer a kid? I'm a lot happier now than when I was a kid. Sure, there are bills to pay, but even at 22 I've been able to find jobs better than working fast food that pay decently for fairly low-stress work. And I'm able to cook and eat whatever I want, go out and come back home whenever i want, listen to whatever music I want at home, and more. And plenty of people still think I'm adorable
@@notascottishgirl2543 this actually felt kinda comforting tbh-
As a 14 year old girl I always felt so behind everyone😭😭😭
😭Exactly, but for me it’s mainly bc I have more “childish” interests then people my age and I can’t talk about them without being “weird”
@@StarsiemaniaTHIS IS SO REAL
@@StarsiemaniaI collect dolls and like to rearrange my stuffed animals on my shelf which wouldn’t be seen as “weird” if I wasn’t 16🧍♀️
Girl don’t worry they’ll look 50 by senior year
@@Starsiemania I’m also 14 and feel out of place, but my unprofessional advice from one teen to another, is to embrace the cringe. “To be cringe is to be free.”
i feel like back then being 9-12 we would dress in clothes that made us happy, like a favorite color or fun graphic of something you like, but now since kids want an “aesthetic” the priority lies in how they’re perceived instead of expressing themselves and what they love.
True aesthetics are fun and can be limiting if you choose one ☝🏾
Hot take: I don't think the subcultures prevalent in the past disappeared, at least not alltogether. I still know a lot of peers my age who are punks, emo kids, skaters, or, at the opposite end, preps or nerds. It's just that new niches were created on top of them.
i wouldnt quite consider my friends exactly "mainstream" or "basic" but i feel that their styles dont go further than hot topic, baggy jeans and tshirts, or just basic shorts and simple tshirts. i try to dress gothic (ill admit i just started that so im still in the awkward phase of dressing), i love goth music and media, and dream of going to goth clubs when im older, and i kind of want to see other teens like that. just be involved in these subcultures and share that with eachother. i guess im not doing too much better though, sometimes i struggle with expressing my interests because kids arent exactly kind about anyone who wears a bit of black
@@tomfoolery666 don't worry kiddo, you'll find your crowd, and I can guarantee that these crowds do still exist, it's just harder to come by peers with similar interests if you're not living in a big city
yes!! me and my best friend both love alternative stuff, we both absolutely love the band mcr and also nu-metal; and one of my other friends likes metal too. my best friend dresses pretty emo but i dress basic ish i guess because its what feels comfortable and i think it looks nice, also i cba to redo my entire wardrobe lol - i would love to dress more goth-ish though because its so pretty. we find 2000s emo/scene things online too and its so cool!
@@verycoolwhaleshark same here, I'm super into anything post-hardcore, metalcore, nu-metal and pop-punk (and MCR has also been my favourite band since I was 16), and I also dress quite basic compared to other alt people I know (because I don't have the patience to do anything other than to throw on a t-shirt I found on the floor and yesterday's jeans), but sometimes I wish I put more thought into how I dressed
@@verycoolwhaleshark also, for alt clothes, I can't stress this enough: thrift stores, your mother's clothes from the 90s, family owned chinese or turkish shops, outlets, swaps, small independent businesses, basically anything that isn't a multi-national chain. After all, punk culture was built on individuality, and I've found treasures that are uniquely mine in all of those places
I remember then i was a teen, the coolest kids weren’t the rich ones but funny ones, smart ones, and “mysterious” ones. But still everyone was talking to each other and helping each other,and we really were a team. We used to have group of friends and always hang out, that’s actually helped me with my social anxiety. Maybe i am just old
I work at a library and there are teens all over the library. We have teen spaces for teens to chill or participate in activities. A lot of libraries have places like exactly what youre describing. A place for them to just chill and hang out. Its unfortunate that its just not widely known.
That gives me a sliver of hope
Damn I live in a major city and my library doesn’t really do any fun events… multiple locations barely have places just to sit :(
They don’t even MAKE teen magazines anymore!! For real. It’s saddening. My kids love magazines I bet they would love teen magazines when they are older. When I was a teen in the 90’s I shopped at thrift stores for a grunge look and then a bright mixed media vintage look. It was so fun, and magazines like Sassy were part of my inspiration.
The 3rd spaces for my neighborhood youth is definitely boba tea shops; I live in Portland OR and they are everywhere. Maybe going to a bodega, burger shop, ice cream shop…food related.
I’m 16 and I definitely agree with “third spaces” being more food related. I live in Texas and after football games the local whataburgers & waffle houses are PACKED with other teens that attended the game. I’m in band and we often plan picnics or section meetups at fun restaurants before comps or Saturday games.
there probably are still teen magazines out there, I know I’ve seen some recently. However if they’re not in stores where you are, perhaps you could find them online and get a subscription so that the magazine gets delivered to you, if you think it’s something your kids would enjoy. I highly recommend the magazine Girls Life which is still in production. I remember as I got into my tween years I stopped reading J-14 and tigerbeat and pretty much stuck to Girls Life because they had some good articles about things like health and nutrition and mental health, not just the celebrity and fashion stuff (though they have that as well). I remember reading an article in GL about the dangers of teens vaping back in like 2012.
I was a teenager from the start of 2010s to the end of it, so my peers grew up during that weird stage between the 00s when social media had only just been created, and the 2020s where social media has really evolved at break neck speed.
The 2010s was an interesting period to be a teen as this was when Kylie Jenner, that whole 2016 makeup buzz, influencers, Instagram & Snapchat were on the rise.
Things weren't necessarily easy for us, because this was when influencers were starting to become a thing, but it wasn't nearly as bad as it is now as at the time it was still a relatively new concept. We still had our awkward teen phase of doing our makeup 'wrong' and yes we wore crop tops and mini skirts, but everything was age appropriate and we still looked like teenagers. This was also when 90s Grunge/Pale Grunge on Tumblr came into trend, so that influenced a lot of how we dressed and acted. Some of us smoked, some of us drank, some of us did drugs, some of us went to illegal raves, some of us had sex - we all wanted to be Effy from Skins. But it wasn't anything out of the ordinary range of adolescent behaviour.
There weren't third spaces around, but I remember we would hang out in this massive field/woods that was behind our school, at coffee shops/cafes, the library or the high street (shopping centres aren't really a thing in the UK, or at least London). This was when we still had shops like Topshop, Forever21 as well as when H&M Divided and Urban Outfitter had a distinctive target demographic for teens.
So it was a weird time, and whilst there were definitely social pressures (to be skinny, body diversity wasn't like how it is now) and it certainly wasn't the experience of being a teen in the 80s/90s/or even the 00s, I am so grateful I am not a teen now.
Agree! I’m 23 and grew up as a teen during that time too. I believe there are still third spaces at least where I am we still have urban, forever 21, Aeropostale, Hollister etc and I still look at those clothes and maybe buy one or two items there
i'm turning 19 in a few weeks and man, this topic has been on my mind for a while. bc while i don't think teen/tween cutlure is completely dead, i do feel that teen & tweenhood now (ESPECIALLY in a post-covid lockdown world) is much more limited than it once was. i also feel like many people of my generations (gen z) have just never gotten to truly enjoy a "traditional" teenhood simply because it was/is so out of reach. i spent most of my life (esp after middle school) being limited in one way or another from accessing the teenage dream my parents had. i couldn't go out places and do things and hang out with friends like they did. i had little to no room to explore my identity outside of social media bc the opportunities to do so simply didn't exist. and sure, dont get me wrong, i went to malls and movie theatres and participated in the latest fashion trends at school and talked with my friends about music and tv and pop culture. but between the horrors of living in late-stage capitalism and being constantly pushed into a state of faux maturity by the older generations around me, i struggled to engage with them the same way previous generations did. i couldn't fully enjoy these things not because they didn't exist (-- they did then and still do!), but bc they weren't accessible. i strongly feel like this is the main reason why things feel different now. its a cultural shift that goes beyond "those kids and their damn phones!" which admittedly not everyone really grasps. its complex and i love seeing a video try and dig deeper at that.
also almost 19 and this is so true 💯
I’m 19 and I can understand where you’re coming from....there are no animated series aimed at teens...everything has to be Riverdale-esque (I don’t watch these kind of shows).
I thought my teenagers from 2017-present will be something similar to the characters in Victorious, Disney Channel and especially Totally Spies. I want to experience the quirky GENUINE teenage phase....but it seems like it’s ERASED......We don’t even have fashion stores catered to us 😭😭😭
i like that teens these days have a better understanding of boundaries and how to set and enforce them. when i look at famous teens of the 2000s and so many of the teen girls were in relationships with older adult men. i like that kids these days aren't interested in experimenting with people who are like....outside of their own age group. good for them honestly!
i also like how it's perfectly safe for them to be an otaku. when i was growing up, being an anime fan (openly) was the equivalent of putting a target on your forehead
@@Crawlingdreams418 im glad teens can like the things they can like without being excessively bullied for it. that being said, the anime industry definitely has a problem with sexualising kids and young high school girls, let's be for real for a second
@@rori9742 agreed.
That’s because teens in the 2000s were a lot worse than today. Teens today are more mature and well behaved
@@albihysenaj5997 today's teens are more well informed thanks to better education and overall awareness. more and more teens are familiar with how predatory adults can groom them and take advantage of them and know how to spot red flags. Unfortunately, teens in the early 2000s simply did not have better awareness, and that failure should be blamed on the education system and the adults around them. I know so many of them who are older now and grieve how they were taken advantage of when they were just kids and how no adults around them took the responsibility of protecting them from other grown ass adults who were preying on them. it's always the responsibility of older people to look out for those who are young and don't know any better, instead of taking advantage of their inexperience.
I'm just glad I was a teen before social media really took off cuz I think the greater exposure pressures the age group into feeling the need to be/look/act "grown"
It’s sad that teens no longer have an awkward phase
They are told to act like adults but also told to act like teenagers
It’s depressing
end up being permanent kids
Yeah and what's used to be considered teenage is now considered entirely childish and it's now teenage to try and be an established adult
@@SubZero-dd3rkI can see the unresolved issues, body dysmorphia, trust issues and trauma now
The awkward phase is not only for personal growth but it helps you to remain humble too
As a teenager trying to maintain friendships, the lack of third spaces is really stressful to me. It seems like the only 'third spaces' (that really aren't third spaces at all) that are available to my friends and I are extracurricular activities or attending high school sports games solely as a pretext to hang out.
For some teens there also maybe fear of being filmed and posted on internet without your consent if you hang out in public space. I think this is also how internet and tiktok changed things. I'm from Europe and we have third spaces still( I know in America it's problem), but I don't see teens hanging out in places I or other teens hanged out when I was younger. And I'm in my 20's so that was not so long ago, before tiktok but we had social media, online games and all that.
exactly, im 14 and im terrified of being recorded and posted somewhere without even knowing about it- just the fact that ANYONE has access to cameras right in their pockets and can very easily film you and make fun of you for millions of people to see, when youre just existing and not even doing anything bad
True
Millennial here in their 30’s. After a loooong hiatus , I went to the club in Miami one weekend. One thing I noticed was how restrained the younger crowd was in the club. It made me sad that this generation doesn’t know what it’s really like to vibe out and turn up with out a care in the world. To literally dance like no one is watching.
Yeah I can see why you’d be forced to assimilate for survival. I dread to think of how a kid going through their awkward cringe stage could be ridiculed in high school and even virally bullied if they’re filmed and posted on sm.
Yeah, just the fact that there could be a video of you simply existing on the internet to see without even knowing how many views it has is insane. You could do anything slightly out of the ordinary or looking different and you have like a 50 percent chance of being recorded, even without your consent. There are literally people who have posted videos of people existing and made fun of them. Now a lot of people have the urge to fit in because of this
I do feel so bad for young kids these days. Some kids have been forced to mentally grow up waaay too fast. You guys have so much potential and a drive for life! You're the future! And maybe that's some pressure but being the future also means creating one that is kind and happy and gentle with meaningful relationships. Im in my 30s currently pregnant with my first and it's scary but that's hope too. Enjoy being a kid, know that you being a kid who makes mistakes but grows and loves is contributing to a bright future too.❤
I commented something similar. I’m a millennial in my mid 30s and had my first child at 33. I feel our generation is also experiencing a shift where back then people were already married with multiple kids by time they were 30 but millennials are opting out of starting families and instead pursuing career and personal advancement
I wonder how many teens and tweens actually associate their fashion choices with all the aesthetics and cores. I remember when I was like, 16 and 17, I observed the cores and thought they were cool, but I never really tried to conform to one
I in fact do
@@abbygamepop Ooh, what aesthetics do you like?
@@bell1337 I like cutecore, a bit of scene, used to like weird core, basically the alt/different style
I dont conform to one, but I adore alternative fashion. I just get weird looks when I wear it tho but that comes with the territory.
@@stxrstruck6755 yeah
Most parents don’t make being teens enjoyable, they make it so hard that you spend most of your teen years rushing to be an adult
Can you give me examples of parents pushing them to be more ‘adult’?
I left home at 14.
I was a teenager from 2010-2016 and honestly feel so blessed tbh, Those years were hard, but I look back and feel really lucky to have gotten to socialize freely and experience culture the way it was. It’s only coming up on a decade but it’s overwhelming how much times have changed. Can’t imagine what it’s like to be a teenager rn
Uh that was just you. Teens were very into social media back then. Twitter, RUclips, Facebook, Instagram were all gaining momentum and by 2012 they are popular.
@@Boxxxxxxxxx but people still socialized normally. I think 2012-2016 was where social media and teen culture interconnected beautifully, well, as beautiful as those two can. It's tiktok and quarantine that ruined it. If you think that was bad, just imagine now.
as a teen, it's so sad seeing everyone around me (and sometimes even myself, early) just throw away their teenhood an innocence in an attempt to become more "adult-like" if that makes sense :( i could talk about this for hours but ur channel seems to cover just about everything, glad i found it !! but yeah it's super sad to say the least 💔
Honestly I miss the 2010s where girls would skateboard, roller skate and have slap bracelets. Just be a cool girl and not be focused on being a sexy girl
Aww man, I remember going roller skating with my friends in our local park every single day of our summer vacation in middle school and spending the whole afternoon trying to recreate the choreos we've seen in the previous night's episode of soy luna, those were the damn days
I thought spaces like this hated "cool girls"?
@@harpsdesire4200 Idk, but I feel like the commenter feels like there’s a difference between “being cool” and “trying to be sexy” I might be wrong though. Maybe just like ppl who in general were just being themselves and doing things perceived as cool.
@@ladyteebugluv got it right
@@xxx_these.flightless.wings_xxx my tween/teen era was full of playing the recorder, pillow fights at sleep overs and vibing to trap
I could never imagine doing what these kids be doing
im 13 as of right now, and by this time next month 14. 14 to me always was the real "first" year as a teenager. so for me my teenage years have technically just started, and the way you talked about being a teenager and the media surrounding it a decade or more ago sounds amazing. The obsession with aesthetics feels obnoxious to me, but the majority of teens now who are more mainstream seem to be into things i would consider rather boring and uncreative, such as Lululemon. a few of my friends are into things like emo music and shop at hot topic, but that just feels to be the full extent of their styles. i wish my friends were more into alternative subcultures, or at the very least wanted to do more things. Not sure i can blame them though, it seems our options are to check out hot topic at the mall, go to the movies, or just sit in an air conditioned room and talk. there seem to be nothing interesting to do on our part of the island, and the extreme heat (typically 90 to 100 degrees) doesnt allow us to be outside often. the movies i grew up watching made being a teenager seem to be the most exciting part of one's life, filled with love, drama, rebellion, style, endless hours at the mall or events. so far my reality has been scrolling on social media for hours, being made fun of for being "emo" (goth), and having too much homework and nowhere and nothing to do
As somebody who is 18 going on 19, and, thus, at the end of my teenage years, I can tell you that both sides of the coin are true. On one hand, yes, our generation's adolescence is boring and far removed from what we've grown up dreaming of and seeing in older media. On the other hand, friendship, love, rebellion, drama, adventure, courage, they're all universal experiences, that you will get to go through, just in your own way.
Pop culture really is constantly telling us that we should be living a more interesting life and the one we have is boring trash.
Im 38 and European, and when I was 15 yes there more subcultures. But the "mainstream" culture was by far the biggest back then as well. People who were goth that time were also outcasts. What surprises me though that people who are goth basically dress just the same as goths 25 years ago.
@@RBB8S that's because goth is a passeistic culture (one that venerates the past)
I'm planning on ☠ like a week before my 15th birthday next year, fuck growing up, I'm gonna be a little girl forever
As a 17yo this actually hit so hard because you are considered uncool for not dressing like influencers and having a certain aesthetic going for you. My teen years are drawing to an end and I wish to spend the rest of my time here as a happy teen like the happy preteen I used to be before 2019. God, it hurts like hell.
Edit: on a funner(imma use that word) side, i remember my giggling and my mom's facepalm whenever we saw a justice outlet anywhere cuz i had to spend time "aww"ing and "mmm"ing over every little trinket they had 😂 circa 2015-16
as a 15 year old i can confirm at least on my part the the ‘hanging out with your friends at a mall’ concept is definitely not dead. shopping in real life stores is much more funner for me than shopping online, it gives me a chance to play around with the way different things fit on me whereas when i’m online shopping it’s more difficult to find any fun in it and to be able to figure out what fits and what doesn’t.
i’m 18, so i’m still a teenager but i’m going into college in a week. but my experience is after covid teenage good kind of died. i’ve had kinda different growing up situation but the mall hit when we were in middle school. but once highschool came around there weren’t rlly places to hangout unless it’s a party, skate park or friendgroup hangout. I don’t know what people younger then me are doing but my age group only goes out if it’s with their friends, thrifting, doing an outside hobby like river, hike, climbing or if there is a party. I feel like cliques still exist but it’s very very different. I live in a very liberal town and kids are def still having sex, experimenting and going out. But i think covid heavily impacted us and now everyone’s introverted
i’m kinda sick so this doesn’t make any sense but trying to share my expirence
About the last part I’m 19 and never been to a party and didn’t lose my v card or even have my first kiss, until a few months ago, so I definitely felt like I was abnormal growing up, still never been on a date either lol
@@caitlingill I’m 19 I can relate as well never been on a first date or to a party I’m a virgin I remember crying because I never been on a date not in a relationship like other girls what is I’m doing wrong is something wrong with me that nobody wants me
@@imauniryne6757 there northing wrong with you, I don’t think you shouldn’t be in a Rush in losing the “V” card or even been on first date. I’m 20 years old & I’m Virgen & never been kissed or northing like that. I personally have bigger things to worry about then that, I’m 20 and I don’t feel like I have my shit together, I’m not smart Enough to go to College & can’t afford college & for Finding a Job it harder me Bc there is not that many options for me. So you know I’m just stuck at home using social media because I don’t know what else to do. Times are harder for me now & it sucks bc I feel like nobody relates to what I’m saying.
As a kid who has always been "shy"/"intorverted"/"antisocial"/"socially anxious"/whatever you wanna call it, I've always wondered if I'll ever be able to make meaningful connections with others, and I've found the answer now that I've grown up: life puts people and social situations in your way, whether you like it or not, and you will find a way to navigate them, out of necessity if nothing else. 14 year old me would've never thought she'd be able to have a full conversation with someone, let alone an interesting one, but now 18 year old me can't wait for the cigarette break at work, so I can talk with my colleagues about whatnot. That's not to say I don't still struggle with social anxiety, because I do, it's just that I've found out that I can manage it. So yeah, I think the kids are going to be alright.
I am happy you are doing better. Good for you. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
I'm planning on ☠ like a week before my 15th birthday next year, fuck growing up, I'm gonna be a little girl forever
@@creepycrybabyxoxogirl are you okay? we are here for you babes 😭
@@motomutant 2024 is gonna be ASS and the LAST
@@creepycrybabyxoxo girl no it won’t be the last, i just turned 15 too we in this together
I'm 19, neurodivergent, and alt. When I say that's a clusterfuck of loneliness, I mean it. There's this massive divide between teenagers who don't want to go outside because the internet is all they need and teenagers who go outside but are very adult and take part in cultures full of drugs, sex, and the likes. It's hard because for my core teenage years I was friends with the former. We had a strong social life but it was all limited to things done online. Whenever I did try to make plans they blew me off or hangouts turned sour, which is why we stopped being friends. But what's crazy is going out trying to find friends seems impossible. Everyone is judgemental and intolerant of normal teenage behavior. They all want to be older than they are. My freshman year of hs kids would brag about their "body count," how many parties they went to, and leak each others unsavory pictures, iykyk... What sucks even more is the lack of third spaces where I can meet these people. I'm a huge fan of music and concert going is a hobby of mine. When I was younger, many shows were 18 or 21+. Now post-covid it seems like even more are 21+ and it sucks because the only spaces I'm comfortable in just,,, aren't accessible to me. It's also hard knowing that when I do go out I can't tell the age of some of these kids. I would NEVER go out of my way to befriend anyone under 17. And it's so weird when they're super cool when engaging in small talk but end up being 14/15!!! That shit shocks me to my core... I feel like the strongest bonds I have are with online friends I made when I was 12 and a few when I was 17. And it sucks because I remain inside. I can't hang out irl with these people and may never be able to. It seems like this never ending cycle of rejection and disgust. Feels like we're in some sort of friend recession =///
That’s so true?! (18 n neurodivergent as well) it’s so weird having preconceived notions of stuff my age, and then finding out the only people into that are like… 15, it’s like I was brought up just as normal teen hood was ending, and I never even got to experience it
trying skateboarding- helped me get out of my shell when i was a younging
The friend recession part cannot be closer to the truth. I'm younger (16) but even people my age are just so sour all the time while trying to be more mature and being so judgemental whenever I try to approach them. It's honestly why I prefer keeping to myself cause it's so hard to actually connect with someone the same age as me.
I am the same alt and everything (but I just turned 20 lol) it honestly gets harder to make friends as you become an adult too. I've been struggling with socializing at my college because everyone is glued to their phones 😭
When I was growing up in the early 2010s, I used to look at what the teenagers then were doing and couldn't wait to have that specifically teenage experience, and now it truly feels like that culture is dead. I did a video on the death of the awkward phase, because there's literally no tweens anymore. Not only is teen culture basically just adulthood light, but even early adolescence has stopped being awkward and goofy. Even 12 year old have perfect makeup and hair now, what is going on.
My older sis was a teen in the 2000s and in her 20s by the 2010s I was always jealous of her and her friends lol now that IM a teen? dawg I don’t even wanna talk about it I just cope and distract myself with small hobbies lol
I’m thankful to have had that awkward tween phase in 2017 (yes 7 years ago) I’m 17 now😅
i relate to this smm im 16 and growing up i couldnt wait to do the things i seen other teens doing, but now that im actually a teenager its lame asf
I’m 25 and always wanted a teen experience like my mum had in the 80s but man… it’s so bad now, I’m honestly so sorry that it’s come to this, I can’t imagine how hard it is for teens these days and I’m scared for my kids to grow up in this world. I know a lot of mums are taking a stand when it comes to tech so hopefully things will change
@@Ariel-lolI can’t believe 2017 was 7 years ago🫣 I’m so old😂
Currently I'm 18, starting college, etc. I do feel like teen culture is very different now. For me, one of the main standouts is how when you do connect with someone, get their snap, etc, most teens dont follow through and even trying to "organize" social events can be challenging because people don't want to leave their house or whatever reason. This is very different from my dads stories of just being bored at home so getting with friends and doing something stupid. Also, on the topic of teen culture is the decline of the teen celebrity. Growing up, all of the 'teen idols" were from TV, music, etc. I was a big selena gomez fan; but with the exception of the stranger things kids, there aren't many non influencer celebrities to follow from TV, media, etc, not many faces that stick around. I think because of this, teens are forced to look up to these adult figures in their college years or beyond, so they will replicate these adult styles instead of engaging in youth culture.
So True
A lot of spaces has been taken by oversexualization and them wanting to look younger even though they do and they are
I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve seen a 13-17 year old girl looking like strippers
Like wanting preventative Botox and you’re 20
we keep telling the younger girls it's wrong dressing like that and they hit you with the "you are jealous because i look better and im younger" "stop sexualizing me" "we were forced to dress like this" like ma'am, no one is holding you gunpoint to dress like a hooker 💀 not generalizing but i've seen a lot in tiktok
all my friends who are 18-21 are all talking about getting preventative botox when they turn 25-30
I wonder if their parents are buying them those clothes
@@jay-iq6gybro literally
@@jay-iq6gy I mean they are right though. What is consider modest is changing and will continue to change. Its not bad or good. Clothes are sexual if you make them sexual.
WAKE UP QUEEN HAS POSTEEED
oh btw im french and i chose to study english culture and madisyn brown really helps because my teacher told us to watch every english stuff (tv shows, books, music) we can just to be connected to english and what i love w madisyn brown is that she talks about trends and topics that i like so keep up like this U GO GIRLLLLL
That’s so cool!!
I think she is well researched on her topics. That’s what drew me in.
Born and raised here in the states and I lived through the history she’s talking about. Haha
(The mall walking and hanging out, not the 1800’s haha)
So you’re in good hands with her content if you’re curious about American culture and the interesting niches to be found.
👍🏻👍🏻
Yeah another French 🇫🇷
As a teenager I’d like to say that you and a lot of people in the comments seem out of touch with reality. While I do agree that tween clothing options aren’t as popular anymore they still exist. If you go to a middle school you’ll see most kids dressing their age. Also y’all obviously have not gone to malls or movie theatres in a while because there are always teens there after school. I think the reason it seems like we don’t exist is because your not interacting with us (as you should) . Just my take on the issue ❤️
Lol exactly. Everyone's in their own niche and I'm glad tween and teens aren't interacting too much with with grown adults.
fr, i will admit there are teenagers that dont dress their age but they mostly exist on social media, go outside to a busy place and you'll see plenty teens acting like teens. i definitely wish there were more spaces for teenagers however, but we just have to make spaces for ourselves sadly D:
@@yessssir I think the main issue is city planning rather than teens not wanting to go out or do things. Its just more difficult to actually get to teen spaces without having to pay :(
@@zahara5173 yess city planning definitely matters! atleast where i live (america) the city planning where i am is a absolute nightmare..😭 if it was easier to get to places meant for socializing, there would be plenty of teenagers there
@@zahara5173 noooo frr, where i live its really nothing to do near me if you dont have a car or money and its so frustrating tbh
i'm a 12, soon to be 13 year old teenager. i feel like a lot of girls my age look so mature that it lowkey overwhelms me. don't get me wrong, i love them and they're gorgeous but i feel like i have the need to become and look like them. i definitely think the media we consume influences the way we think and our perception of ourselves. but still im really excited to turn 13 in december but also not excited since im entering highschool next year lol
im 15 and in high school and i still feel the same as you… everyone seems so mature, it feels like me and my friend group are the only kids going through an awkward phase
@@motomutantall those other kids will peak in high school or college while you and your friends will never stop getting cooler
In Western European countries like Portugal, Italy, and Germany you still see teen oriented stores as many people still go to malls or physical stores to shop. Very common places to shop are Bershka, Pull & Bear, and Astradivarius, all of which are owned by the same company that created Zara yet their target audience is a younger demographic. Online brands like Cider and Princess Polly also serve a young adult/ teen demographic.
I’m 34 and this video made me reminisce about reading all the teen magazines you mentioned and going to the mall with friends, watching teen shows on cable tv (like Degrassi, The OC, etc), flipping through Limited Too catalogs, and trying on every body lotion at B&BW. Now the malls are dead, print media is dead, subculture is dead. How does a teen form a sense of sense when all they have to identify with is TikTok “cores” and influencers who lie about how amazing their lives are and FaceTune themselves to look like a Bratz doll? Like, young people, who are you? I don’t get youth culture at all anymore, damn I feel old lol
im 19 so nearly finished with teenagerhood, but i think the "fitting into an aesthetic" thing is definitely seen more in the younger teens/preteens rather than the ones who are around 17-19. my cousins who are around 11-14, especially the girls, are so much more conscious with how they dress themselves compared to me and my peers. and i agree about the third spaces too! i grew up sheltered and my parents rarely let me go out and i know for sure that that had affected something in me psychologically. i didn't even know the concept of third spaces was a thing until this video!
like i get anxious sometimes at the thought of hanging out with friends outside of college, when it shouldn't be that way. i feel if i were allowed to explore more about my interests and identity, let myself make small mistakes growing up instead of being caged up, i wouldn't be this nervous about so many things. also, unrelated, but i looove your videos! i love watching them during my free time or even when doing homework that doesn't require much concentration. you're like the older sister i never had! keep up the good work
I’m 19 as well can relate with feeling nervous and everything my mom always wanted me to go out more make friends hangout with friends still do till this day I only really have one friend
I agree so much!!! It’s like that age from 10-14 that you want to feel good and look good and then something just happens and you transition into that “college sweatpants/hoodie” combo, I’m 17 now and I’ve definitely gone through a few phases 😂
I think honestly this also has a lot to do with people just living longer. It used to be you were only young and healthy in your teens and twenties, so I think people often used to revere being a teen as the peak. When people live longer lives, they become less obsessed with the idea of high school having to be super important socially, because they know life continues to be better after. My teens were horrible but I got through it thinking about being an adult who would be away from the problems that come with the powerlessness of childhood. I think the media shift represents a mindset shift away from revering youth as much. I remember being told high school had to be cherished and id always miss it and it’d be the best time of my life and it was not and I’m so glad that life has more than that to offer.
That’s a good point. A long time ago people would die at 30. Now they have a lot more years to live. So back then they wanted to stay young and innocent for longer. But nowadays you live long after high school.
As a teenager, who only has 2 friends in school that can't hang out out of school, I'm not socially anxious, I socialize a lot in school with everyone, I speak on the lessons too, however I find it extremely hard to find friends out of school which sucks because like I said, even though I do have a lot of "people I talk to", I don't have that group of people who I feel like are actually there for me and I could truly call them friends. I feel like back in the day it was easier to find those people out of school.
Bro this is so me ,but I am social anxious since 7 grade, but all you have said it's true an that is the reason I am scared about the highschool end I will never do friends out of school 💔
The fact the word teenager was created by corporations in the 1920’s is 🤯. Great video essay I learned a lot today. 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿
Makes sense cuz people r adults when they turn 14.
I'm in my 20s but my teenage hood feels like a giant lie because it was all for marketing, always has been, and here I am feeling nostalgic about it
I'm planning on ☠ like a week before my 15th birthday next year, fuck growing up, I'm gonna be a little girl forever
@@creepycrybabyxoxoI'm reporting you!
@@mamamoonie why
As someone who works in a mall, trust me, teens still show up (especially at Spencer’s)
I'm the Philippines and malls are still very alive and well here, many people go meet up there and eat and hang out. I'm not much aware about the mall culture there in the west but I've seeing things like a lot of malls are closing or dead there.
I’m 23 now, but being a preteen in the early 2010s and ending my teens in 2019, I remember going through so many phases. First being my experimental half blue/magenta eye makeup and hair feathers, peace sign clothes, like you could obviously tell I was a young teen. Even at 16,17, people could tell my age correctly, we all did makeup but idk, it was just different. Now I see girls walking around looking like mini 20+ year olds. I believe it’s the way social media has influenced us as a whole and doesn’t really target teens like magazines or shows did back in the day. Trends go by a lot faster now, music in some ways is different, I just wish I could see more young girls enjoying their awkwardness before becoming an adult, it’s funny to look back on- but it was some of the best times and best memories to talk about with friends, it all seemed so innocent.
The amount of adult content shaping its way into young teens fashion and everyday life is crazy too. Also the rise of the “scary outside world” (I’m scared of places now too due to how the worlds changing), you see less teens hanging out at parks or malls, less distinguishable than an adult at least! 😂 but that’s just my rant. I’ve been thinking of this conversation for so long because I’ve totally noticed a change!
As a 13 yo I completely relate. I was abt 8yo when “tweens” started to disappear. I know how to do my makeup i do skincare but my parents are a little more strict. We dont have jobs and no experience of “hanging out at the local strip mall for the day”. Its not safe to go anywhere and we are hyper isolated. Its a weird time to be alive and i find myself making vows so my kids have a better experience and dont have this weird tightrope walking when it comes to maturing with time.
I feel like we also look past the fact that we lived/living through a pandemic. Teenagers are probably anxious about leaving the house because for a while they weren’t allowed too. It's not like there's much to do anyway (at least in my area). There’s nothing enticing them to leave. And the whole "not sexually active" thing doesn't surprise me considering teens are more aware of political issues and are probably scared to do so.
I am genuinely interested in your content and I appreciate the amount of research and general work that goes into your video essays. Thank you for always delivering informative case studies and for introducing concepts that are not generally well-known. This time around I learned of the concept of ‘third spaces’ and I am inclined to read further into the topic. Kudos!
I also think oliSUNvia has great informative video topics as well
I don't even feel comfortable going downstairs to the kitchen/living area because I don't feel comfortable around my family so I feel like I only have 1 and a 1/2 spaces. You telling me people used to have 3?!
I'm 27, the current AI "Photo Yearbook" trend is so crazy to me because when I was a teen, we would go to the mall to visit the 'Picture People' store and do big group matching outfit photoshoots for fun. Maybe $5/person and package came with a ton of photos so everyone got to take some home after. I'm grateful to still have a physical item/memory from the old days
As a 13 year old, I have a strict mom, I would love to go out and be dumb with my friends. But, I think my mom is really just worried about me falling into the wrong crowd because of how out of control kids my age are.
That’s a thing of the past to go out and do dumb things and parenting today is way more strict than it was in the 20th century
Hey there! I’m 15 and from my experiences, it doesn’t seem like these teen subcultures are gone, they’re just a lot quieter than they used to be. I think this quietness has to do with the development of social media and how everything has become a “core” or “aesthetic.” If you’re part of a certain teen subculture, you’re automatically inserted into a “core/aesthetic,” even if that isn’t you. It’s also put a lot of pressure on not being able to go through an awkward phase. At this point in time, you’re expected to know exactly what subculture or “aesthetic” you belong to and you should only stick to that one subculture or aesthetic. It’s really looked down upon to be more than one aesthetic
So true! Like if you skate you're in the "skater aesthetic" or if you dance you're automatically a "preppy girl"!?
@@hana_hashi ikr, or if you wear black then you're emo
I am an 80s baby with two teenage girls. You’re right most of it’s online. My girls are absolutely glued to Roblox because that’s how they socialize. But also it seems like after school clubs have become the big new third space. There’s a lot more after school clubs than when I was when I was a teenager. Yes you’re still at school but it’s not necessarily learning it’s just finding people with common interests. I’ve also noticed there’s a lot more hobby camps that go year-round. It just sucks because they cost so much money so it’s almost like the only people who can afford it are those who are privileged with parents with money. Boys and girls club seems to be a great third space. Things I’ve noticed less of our youth groups. As in youth groups that allowed everybody to join and not just those who are members of that church congregation.
I'm 14 and we usually do have "third places" its just that its maybe not the same places. We don't have much stuff to do in our town, so we usually just go out to get boba or some other food or just go to Safeway. I doubt many other people go to safeway for entertainment but you gotta do what you gotta do.
we also go to the park a lot
you bring up a really good point with this video. social media is definitely apart of this major shift. it's kinda sad because when i was a teenager in the 2010s there definitely was a sense of teen culture/identity in the media. i miss those days. i had a subscription to seventeen magazine from age 15-17 or so. i also LOVEDDDD the show 6teen! my cousin is a young teen now and i wish she had what i had as a teenager. i think that would make her teenage experience a lot more wholesome. thanks for this video madisyn!!
as a teen someone needs to make a petition to find a place for teens to hangout that doesn’t need to cost money, like some hangout club or something because all we can do it go to the mall or a random park. we need more third spacesss
idk abt everyone else but i’m a teenager in highschool and my friends and i still shop at malls all the time. we still go to hollister and aeropostale. i personally like shopping in person, not online, because the quality and fitting online is often questionable. but i do agree with a lot of what was said in this video, especially in regards to the absence of tween clothing. i went into middle school fresh out of covid and was still wearing my elementary school clothes. in eight grade i started exploring fashion a bit but it wasn’t tween clothing, it was teen and young adult clothing.
As someone who graduated high school in 2019 I kinda saw first hand the effects of social media on teenhood as my sister is now going through her junior year. I can also speak to the effects of not having a third place. As a kid, I lived in a suburban area, and because my parents were not very social, all I had were home and school. This put me wayyyy behind in making and keeping friends, as well as going out and doing activities, so it took me until college to have friends, and until grad school to be able to work on actively making and keeping friends. Not having a third space or a space to go to foster these skills, in combination with the lasting effects of the pandemic, is going to cause some huge issues for youth today, especially those without the money to join clubs, churches or affiliations that provide a paywalled third place.
I'm 16 and there really isn't much to do as a teenager where I live. I'm lucky that I'm more of an alt girl and really like museums and hanging out in cultural/artsy spots. Besides that, malls are still one of the places we go to, being bookstores and the movies the most common places to be in.
I think third spaces didn't disappear COMPLETELY, but they have downgraded a lot. I always felt this lack of places to hang out in my teens, and when i complained about it, people would say things like "you can go to the park". Sure i can, but what are we gonna do there? It's just a place with 2 benches a a tree 🥴
im a teenager and i would hang out at the mall and the library with my friends but tbh, those spaces were very discouraging. like a lot of stores would kick us out just for acting silly? like we wouldn't even be loud or abruptive just talking to eachother and making weird faces or something and then a store would kick us out or a librarian would tell us to stop. which i guess in a library since its a learning space thats a bit understandable but a mall? idk i just feel like on top of social media like theres just a genuine fear that people have of other people just existing and it makes socializing much harder
I'm in my 20s as well and I feel like I caught the transition of pre-tiktok teenhood to after exactly as it was happening. We did have facebook and instagram but most of us still hang out at the mall, in the city center, grabbing coffees and chasing after buses and trains to boy group concerts. I had some magazines and I always loved reading them, analyzing them with my best friends, fighting over posters with my sister, and waiting for the next issue but that kind of ended in elementary school/junior high. We still had a lot of the companionship and teen culture which I kind of miss but I'm sure future generations will have progressively less of it and lose an imperative part of growing up and discovering your identity, making mistakes, expressing yourself, and just having fun. I wish we could keep some of this as adults because it feels like the world is getting more and more cold and indifferent and it's not even our fault.
Every generation thinks the one coming up after them is doing so much worse, but life goes on and things just change. At 26, I can still remember people harping on about how terrible life is for millenials and how we didn't get to experience the cool era of music before social media, we're immature but want to grow up too fast, too fragile, too lazy, etc. It's always something.
Having less sex isn't a bad thing or even indicative of anxiety. People are more educated about boundaries, consent and the physical and emotional risks involved with sex so maybe they're more selective. I distinctly remember very gross behaviour being considered normal when I was growing up in the late 00s and 2010's. Things like consent and *vast* age differences were so overlooked. Scarlett Johansson getting groped in the middle of the red carpet, Christina Aguilera getting called a piece of ass by gossip a reporter, Kirsten dunst kissing 31 yr old brad Pitt as a pre teen, Vanessa hudgens being publicly berated about her leaked phots . How is the change a bad thing?
As for teenagers wanting to look older, this is once again not a new thing at all. Teen girls were experimenting with makeup as part of the coming of age process long before this decade. They have more information available so they get better at it quicker. Also, adults have weird ideas about what tweens and teens look like. The other day I watched a video about gen z (or alpha, it was one of the youngins) and people in the comments apparently thought the 13 yr old looked _9_ . At this point I think this discussion is the *"yoga pants vs flared leggings"* debate up to 11. Millenials just need to accept we're getting old😂😂. We are not even the second rising generation anymore --- gen alpha is here. Society keeps on changing with time and that's not necessarily good or bad, it just is.
This was the comment I was looking for because I feel the same. There’s nothing new about any of these topics, the times have changed so the way these themes manifest is different in every generation. But it’s still a repeated cycle rooted in the same concepts. Being a teen in the 2010s I idolized being a teen in the early 2000s often and experienced faux fomo from my inability to experience that era. Todays teens are no different. When you are teenager you get to see the nostalgia and lived experiences of other teen eras and it somewhat sets the tone for what you feel like yours should be and look like too. I will say the only major difference I feel like is def COVID and social medias rampant development and the effects on the teen psyche.
thank you this conversation feels like a huge echo chamber of people subconsciously mourning their lost youth & projecting that onto the next generation & i just wish more people could gain a twinge more of self awareness, like it very much gives boomer vibes & i don't understand how that's becoming such a collective opinion on modern youth so fast by people who aren't even that old how did everyone forget like it's weird literally none of its new aside from the way it's manifesting & some of its even good like having more sexual discipline 😭
now that i'm 21 and in college, i feel like i have access to more third spaces than i ever did as a teen. in part because i have more money to pass around due to my part-time job and in part because i stopped being so ashamed of loitering around without buying anything.
me and my friends hang out in front of the fast food joint at the mall near our college, we squat around in parks gnawing on stale breadsticks and are content to sometimes travel up to an hour just to get to some event without an entry fee. we also occasionally go to bookstores just to thumb through their manga and fantasy sections or to tabletop shops just to check out dice (and maybe chat with fellow nerds while we're there). there have also been multiple occasions where i was able to drop to one of my friend's workplace and loiter around for cheap, and i have access to a public library where i'm able to go if i ever get tired of my family members (sometimes even literally, the librarians usually couldn't care less if you sleep there).
i only wish that it was easier and cheaper to access these place nowadays, and i wish that teens were made aware of all the options they had
Also, ur an adult, not an underage infant who has no rights.
I'm 22 and i still feel myself like 16 or 17... But something really changed. I don't have a lot of friends anymore (mostly because I'm changing cities to live every couple of years), I don't feel like I could go to party again because I'm really tired of alcohol and don't want to listen to loud music... Oh now I feel like I'm 64 😥
I'm 19, and I feel like kids were trying to act grown in middle school than high school. By the time people were in high school, we all were doing our own things, being our own selves. It is so hard for me to figure out what makes 16-year-old me and 19 (almost 20) year old me different. Not because I was “trying” to act grown when I was 16, but because my identity and personality was nearly the same. Even the way I dress is nearly the same. I literally have clothing from middle school that I still wear.
I do believe adults have to give people who are in their late teenage years some grace. Because there isn't a whole lot of teens (even preteen) things that you can do now. I specifically remember when I was a preteen listening to a fun pop song, but now everything about sex and drugs etc. Evens shows are like that now (13 Reasons Why and Euphoria) just to name some examples. There are no more coming to age shows anymore (Like Boy Meets World and Degrassi.) Even shows like Full House were relatable.
I also feel like people have to consider take social media into account because where in an age where people would rather be on their phone than be social. As a kid who wasn't allowed to be on social media (besides RUclips) until I was 18, I find myself being into the middle when it comes to topics like these because for me, I am very antisocial and to myself, but at the same time when it comes to making friends or just socializing, I would rather do it in person than online like a lot of people my age.
I’m the same age as you, turning 20 in 2 months. At 16 I was already acting so grown, I couldn’t even tell who’s older looking side by side. I feel like I wasted my teen years acting like an adult and now that i’m an adult everything seems boring. Our generation truly were one of the firsts to be fucked over by social media
For me, the time a lot of my peers spend with each other is getting drunk and vaping etc. if you don’t really want to do that - like me - it’s a lot more difficult to make and hang out with friends cause if people are being social they usually hop to the nearest city and get black out drunk, this has become increasingly common over the last 5 or so years. Although this is just my experience from the central belt of Scotland so it probably does only apply to a very small area.
To all the teens reading, go roller skate. Go to a roller skating ring even if you can’t skate. They are such teen oriented and nice spaces. I went to one and a girl offered me a homemade business card for her deviant art account. They’re lovely.
Cars are a big part to blame for the lack of third spaces. Cities being built for cars means everything is further away and less accessible but especially for teenagers who cannot drive, means that they either have to rely on someone with a car (which has to be an adult) or public transport (mainly a US problem) which might not be accessible. No one is going to go somewhere if it's inconnvenient for them.
I'm from the UK but where I live, my secondary school is close to shopping centre where I'll see kids hang out at KFC and McDonalds after school because it's literally a 5 minute walk from school plus the bus stop to take them home is nearby.
I hate it when adults are really mean to kids on the internet, because “they’re on the internet which is an adult space” … so you get a pass for calling them stupid?? They’re still kids, and if they’re on a site that’s not appropriate for their age, it’s probably because there is nothing in between it and preschool cartoons. Yes, teenagers (including me btw) are spending too much time on their phones, so are adults. Almost like phones are designed to be addictive..
Also I wish my area had somewhere to hang out, like a swimming pool or even a library. I’m usually too busy or tired to do anything except lie around after school, but I’d like to have the option.
That’s funny because earlier today, my friend and I came across a store that we used to love as teenagers (Claire’s) and it looked so empty and saddened me a lil bit. My friend asked me “why nobody care about this brand anymore it used to be the sh!t for us” and I just told her that teenagers don’t exist anymore, they just became little adults and don’t have a phase between childhood and adulthood. That’s really sad but ig social medias are a BIG part of this phenomenon.
I like the squishmallows at Claires.