Leaving Mormonism in Las Vegas - Shelise Sola of
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- Опубликовано: 6 июн 2024
- Shelise Sola discusses her life journey of being raised in the Mormon church, including the purity culture, self-worth struggles, and sexual trauma she experienced. She shares about having a faith crisis in her 20s after learning disturbing historical truths about the church, feeling liberated yet terrified, and rebuilding an identity outside of Mormonism. Sola also opens up about confronting childhood abuse memories, finding healing through experiences with psychedelics and embracing her voice by starting a podcast to support others leaving high-demand groups.
/ cultstoconsciousness
/ cultstoconsciousness
Episode Show Notes: www.mormonstories.org/portfol...
Chapters
00:00:00 Intro & Intentions
00:04:44 Story of Mormon royalty
00:08:12 Learning about polygamy for the first time at age 11
00:10:35 Family culture
00:14:20 She was very quiet growing up, but she was a dancer and loved it
00:16:30 Shelise makes costumes for TV and movies, she also acts
00:21:12 Mormon teen years
00:21:55 Purity culture
00:22:10 The lesson of the different kingdoms was traumatic
00:30:00 Trying to follow the rules of modesty
00:33:33 Biggest gripes with purity culture is that it has the opposite effect
00:43:45 Dating as a Mormon in High School
00:49:00 Worthiness interviews
00:53:20 The most cringy bishops interview and learning about her dad’s infidelity
01:00:47 Moving to Oregon was the best thing she could have done
01:02:45 Telling her peers about the Mormon church
01:08:21 She went home and started googling these answers to her friends questions
01:11:55 She loses her friend and goes to college in Vegas
01:14:00 She believed the church was true, but she dipped her toes in sin in High School
01:19:00 Life in Vegas “sin city”
01:25:00 Sexual sins with her boyfriend
01:31:35 The bishop punished her with a year of no temple, same punishment as sexs
01:34:50 What if the church is the problem?
01:38:00 Her family's relationships with the church, brothers, etc.
01:39:50 Her parents called her and told her they weren’t going to church any more
01:42:30 What did she feel when leaving the church?
01:45:10 A man she was dating took away her virginity
01:54:00 Millionaire Matchmaker
01:59:00 Her life now, confronting abuse
02:02:45 Dating after leaving the church; Breaking up with boyfriend after two years
02:03:09 Abusive and toxic relationships after leaving
02:10:55 Spiritual experiences using psychedelics
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At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.
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Thanks so much for having me on! Being in the hot seat for such an in depth conversation had me realizing things I had never even considered before. Thank you for facilitating such an open and safe space for me, and others, to deconstruct our lives. Love you both! ❤️🙏
@CultstoConscientious so happy too see even while ready too pop. You are out their being a warrior still spreading your message. And since I've been a active watcher and fan seeing go from this ingenue that I identify with into an engaged women, bringing your wonderful husband and partner Jonathan into the channel, and now into motherhood. I have a niece your age so I have alot of Auntie love, hope and worries 4 u. I know these "para" relationships with folks like you seem empty, but I feel you really care about ALL who follow you. That you appreciate us. I am so excited about this new journey. Hearing you come full circle here with John and Margee. You are a living testimony of someone who BROKE the cycle of false witness and SA. You are a champion. ❤❤❤ Congrats on this interview.
Great interview, Shelise. You’re an amazing human.
Thanks so much for telling your very interesting story Shelise. Many many blessings on you. 😊
What a great Interview.!
🥰🥰🥰
Shelise beautifully models self-love without narcissism. I think that Mormonism modeled narcissism and too many of us “caught” it. It’s so helpful to have this example after being immersed in a world of the arrogant and entitled for so long. It’s hard to see that water you are swimming in. Thank you, Shelise, for standing on the shore showing us what healthy looks like. You really are a sort of lifeguard after all. 💜
Wow! What an incredible comment! I’m blushing over here 🥰 thank you so much! You might be right, now I’m a “lifeguard” against Cults! Lol
@@CultstoConsciousness , thank you for being you, Shelise. You inspire me!
That is so well put! Today, we preach so much self-love that I sometimes have doubts as to whether we're pushing our youngsters to be narcissists. But, as you put it, self-love does not mean entitlement; that is where parents and educators need to focus their input. Teaching them self-love without entitlement. I have always been a proponent of teaching duties alongside rights to our young ones.
Her Mom is amazing!! I love her for not shaming Shalise. John thank you for bringing her today!! I can never get enough of her guests or personal stories. Super women!
My mom is the real MVP 😁 Thank you so much for your support!❤
I love her mom so, so much. Listening to them together helps fill in some of the mama gap in my own life 😭❤️
Her mom is the best! I love it when her mom comes on Cults to Consciousness
3 hours of Shelise and Mormon Stories!!! Christmas in February!
Haha you’re so kind! Glad you enjoyed it!
I'm glad y'all got out so early. I figured it out finally this past year. 55 years old. My whole life came crashing down around me. It has been a ride for sure.
Hugs❤
❤❤❤
Yup.....same here. I'm 55, 30 plus years in temple garments, fully in with my convert husband and our 6 kids. The bubble burst 2 years ago learning things that blew my mind. Wish I had known sooner - but just didn't.
Loved this interview....❤
si Jennifer me da justo que haya salido del mormonismo tengo 48 años de edad pero yo salí del mormonismo hace como diez años que deje de la iglesia nomas dure diez años en la iglecia fue suficiente para descubrir como nos manipulado y mentido esos líderes llamados profetas y apóstoles me causo mucho enogo descubrir tanta mentira y deseo que más y más jente salgan de esa secta manipuladora atestados de mentirosos
I am right where you are. I turned 56 last month. I started reading the CES letter and then listening to Mormon Stories and can't get enough. I'm pretty obsessed with John and Margi and would love to meet them. I'm still in the middle of my faith crisis. I don't even know where to go from here. I know it's not true. Just saying that out loud makes me sick to my stomach, but I cant stop moving forward. I wish I had learned all of these truths 30 years ago and not dragged all of my children into this. I'm very sad, angry, and overwhelmed right now. I'm very grateful to John and Margi Dehlin for their courage and for being a guiding light for me as I go through this huge transition in my life.
Two of my favorite RUclips programs coming together?! What a treat! Thank you, Shelise, for being so vulnerable and sharing your journey. You are my hero!
🥹❤️
I agree this was a fantastic episode
Shelise is an incredible woman. I had an opportunity to work with her as a photographer in Los Angeles. Wonderful personality. 🥰
Thank you, Renee!🙏
I found Mormon Stories through Cults to Consciousness! Both your channels have been a HUGE part of my own deconstruction after dealing with the heartbreak of realizing the church I had been devoted to for 40+ years was built on falsehood after falsehood.
I'm so grateful to all of you, (Shelise, John, Margi, Jonathan, Maven, Gerardo,) for being vulnerable in sharing your own experiences and for all the behind-the-scenes support that make all your episodes so easy to listen to.
Best wishes to Shelise and Jonathan on the arrival of their daughter! ❤
John & Margi you are great together interviewing. Margi your so insightful & ask the questions or make the statements that I'm thinking. You keep the flow of the program. John you know so much history & tying your knowledge into your psychology; is always interesting. Thankyou both ❤
I agree! They are a great team and made me feel very comfortable.
It goes without saying that I appreciate John, but Margie brings such sincerity, intelligence and sharp insights. She's like a warm blanket of safety and security.
The abuse didn’t “make you stronger” Your strength came forward in the recovery process from abuse.
Couldn’t agree more! Words matter and I will make conscious adjustments next time I speak to that❤
Shelise!! I also figured out that my Dad had an affair (I was 16). I worked for him and it was a lady who also worked with us. I was the only one of my siblings who knew and I told my Mom right away. I had the same feelings of it being so unfair that my Mom would loose her enteral companion and our family was broken and I was angry. My mom stayed for another 10 years and stood by his side through excommunication and all until they were back in good temple standing. The lack of support for my Mom and also the public shame in our small town while my Dad still got the underserved veil of secrecy in our family just ruined the church for me .
I’m sorry you went through the same thing! It was awful. Same here, she worked with my dad and showed up to a construction site where my mom and I both were. 😒
Shelise is absolutely a hero! Still so beautiful inside and out despite the trauma
You’re so kind! Thank you ❤🙏
The clarity of this woman’s insight is extraordinary, as is her ability to convey those insights to her listeners in such an expressive and engaging and thoughtful way. Shelise, thank you for existing as a light in this muddled world!❤
How kind of you! Thank you so much ❤ I appreciate it
Hi 👋 Former Catholic here. What a beautiful woman- inside and out! So wonderful how she shares her healing journey. I’m excited to listen to her podcast! Thanks for another excellent interview, John and Margi ❤️
❤
they do and did stuff like this in public schools in North East. Charter schools have school uniforms and are strict.
Yay!! I love Shelise ❤️ so glad you could have her on the podcast
❤️❤️❤️
I actually found MSP through C2C! Two of my absolute favorite podcasts
Oh that’s great!
Looking forward to this interview! I really enjoy Shelise, her husband and her mother! Excited for their baby to arrive! Cults to Consciousness has an awesome platform. Thank you Mormon Stories for this interview!
Thank you, Debra!!❤
Chelise and Jonathan rock with authenticity. Keep up your groundbreaking and transformative work.
Love Shelise! Her show is so informative and engaging. She is so well spoken, thoughtful, and empathetic to her guests. I look forward to every new episode. Thanks for having her on.
Thank you! 🥰🙏
Shelise is so amazing! What a very special being! Every time I hear her stories, I am so grateful. So, thank you for this exhaustive interview - I have been blessed.
🥰🙏
This girl right here has done so much for people she doesn’t even know, her and Amanda Rae probably saved my life thanks to their transparency in their deconstruction process. A thank you just simply doesn’t suffice, but it’s a good place to start. THANK YOU SO SO MUCH SHELISE ❤
Wow! That means a lot! Thank YOU❤
John and Margie, your generosity in cheerleading for Shelise - a model of true and gracious grown-ups.
Shelise just had this energy that is happy, loving and healing. It's so RARE! ❤️❤️❤️
So damn beautiful seeing this powerhouse of a woman speak her truth. Found you guys through C2C a long time ago, love seeing you guys come on. And thank you guys for giving *Shelise* more exposure to do exactly what she does for others as well. I'd love to see you guys, Shelise and Jonathan sit down for a bit and chat about things! You guys ALL do beautiful work and deserve the world for your strength and headstrong nature. So much love and support for each of you beautiful souls!! 🖤
My high school had a shame shirt too. It said, "Tomorrow I will dress for success!" I had a very enterprising friend who figured out how to make and sell them. Half our senior class owned one. 🤣
Shelise talking about touch reminded me of something I've been doing. I'm not a big hugger, but I like to hug people when they seem to need it. I've started to ask, "Can I give you a hug?" first. It might seem like a small, silly thing. No one has even said no to that question yet. But as someone with PTSD from SA, I think giving people (particularly children) that control and choice is so important.
Such a painful subject leaving cults…she is great in helping people navigate the ups and downs…
What an incredible interview!
Shelise, we only met recently, and I didn’t know what you had been through. You’re doing inspiring work. Love and best wishes to the growing family. Take care of yourself!
Three of my favorite interviewers/story tellers/questioners! I have recently found C to C and have followed M S for about a year. I am a recovering Catholic from a very catholic extended family of several sufferers. You have all helped me to put 2+2 together. Thank you from my heart to yours!
I found Mormon stories because the algorithm brought me your interview with Jessie Hildebrandt. I’m a New England Episcopalian so this is all foreign to me but your guests are fascinating and cults are something we all need to be aware of because so many people seem susceptible to them, religious and political ideology zealotry.
I wasn’t even following the Hildebrandt/Franke case or the Daybell/Vallow case but the way you found a way to connect them and how they related to Mormon stories has been fascinating. You have many good guests with interesting perspectives.
Love John and Shelise. Doing such good work for this world.
So many parallels in our stories. Thank you for your strength in sharing and helping me finally want to confront my memories.
I'm much older than you, but the modesty patrol was also happening at Centerville Jr. HIgh in the '70s. On field day, where we spent a portion of the day outside playing games, we could wear shorts. The Seminary teacher told me to go to the principal's office and ask him if my shorts were too short. The principal looked me over and said that's exactly what you should be wearing. I often re-live walking down the empty hallway in fear of what the principal would say. It felt so wrong. But walking back to the Seminary building armed with vindication felt so right.
Shelise, I appreciate you. Just the way you tell your stories make them so relatable.
I’m so happy to hear that!
I found you guys via Shelise and was happy to see Amanda Rae on as well (John you were so encouraging and amazing as a mentor). Great mash up guys
This the most singularly informative compilation of the doctrines/beliefs of the LDS/Morman church.😊
I love it when Shelise and John are on together, I get such strong proud (podcast) dad vibes from him
I love Shelise! I've heard her tell her story before but ill listen again. I really like her vibe and the content with her mom is so nice. ☺
The bishop gave the harsh repentance because his ego wanted to assert his dominance over a beautiful young woman.
This is a phenomenal interview! The insight, the clarity, the vulnerability and the compassion, of all of you, is so profound!
@Shelise - thank you for sharing and reflecting so thoughtfully on your experiences. Your insights opened additional clarity and insights on my own completely different experiences - there were resonances in some of what you shared today that surprised me.
Also, I had no idea how deep your journey had taken you already in your young life. Already respected your and Jonathan’s work, and now respect you both even more.
Thank you both for your intelligence, clarity and sensitivity in your work. You are helping many.
Wishing you all a beautiful birth!
Thank you for sharing that! I’m so glad it was helpful. ❤ thanks for your support!
I loved Margie explaining the "lens you were given." It's very spot on to the lens we are given and grow up using in the West, US, Europe where we are brainwashed to think we are the saviors of the planet and spread freedom and democracy and have zero lens or clue what it's like to see the world on the other side of that exact lens. Our lens is based on us living well at the expense of so many nations of people on so many different continents, and we are completely oblivious and keep blinders on about it. all the while people have never not been resisting and fighting back.
I love Shelise so much I could listen to her all day❤❤❤
I’ve been waiting for this since I saw you on Shelise’s channel!
🥳
@@CultstoConsciousness this was an amazing interview! Wishing you nothing but the best with the end of your pregnancy, delivery and snuggling your baby girl!
I am glad to read this comment because I half thought I'd dreamed it (as I sleepytime with RUclips and the start of this was while i slept).
@@kenzieq1thank you! Snuggling her right now 🥰
Yay for Shelise and the bravery she has to share her story!🎉 Shelise, I love that you have the chance to be a guest on another podcast especially Mormon Stories!
For a principle to probe you about the lines in your underwear, but Mormons are so angry when you talk about or ask about garments, and then some Mormons actually show their garments as a flash of their “righteousness”.
Absolutely crazy confusing.
Thank you, Anjelika! You are such a huge support and I always appreciate your kind words!❤❤❤ such a great point about the underwear thing!!
@@CultstoConsciousness 💕
Love Shelise and her podcast . Even though I have not been in a cult I’m learning so much about American psyche and trends and the effects in the current political moment. Wishing her the best with her baby and program!
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Love this channel. You all are doing an awesome job and definitely shedding light into the world!
Happy to have joined this live! Great interview
Shelise, watched your channel with the guest Eli Yoder. Now I a bit of yours. All I can say I knew the there was "issues" with the Mormons from the book I read written by Lynn Wilder, former Mormon. All I can say THANK YOU for enlightening your viewers.
Listening to her story I feel like her mom had a lot to do with her getting out earlier. She had her mother’s unconditional love and support. Unlike some other stories where when they lose they lose the church they lose everything.
Looking forward to seeing this! ❤
“finding peace and love and joy in the world”
I LOVE shalise! I'm excited to listen ❤️
🥰
I’ve been binge watching Cults to Consciousness! The stories bring back some of my own memories growing up in an Independent Pentecostal Church. While my own story is not near as harrowing as some of these women you’ve featured, we also had a purity culture. I was shamed for simple things such as cutting my bangs or voicing that I’d like to wear face powder. We had to wear long dresses, sleeves, high neck, no make up, no dancing, no movies, six inch rule for ALL grades as young as Kindergarten. Kindergarten girls had to dress in the same garb. Lots of hell fire coming from the pulpit. It shaped my own perception of how I should behave as a woman and caused me a lot of misery in how I thought of myself and how I thought I should be perceived in the eyes of a man. I missed out on many things because of this upbringing and for sure mad some bad decisions.
Love this Podcast!
What a great interview. Love it when John And Margie are on.
The thing about Mormonism is they are motivated by getting into the Celestial kingdom, instead of just doing the right thing and treating others well because you want to, which is where true happiness comes from.
What an excellent interview! ❤️ I’m going back to Cults to Consciousness and re-listen to your earlier podcasts, now that I know more of the history of them. I’m not Mormon or ex-Mormon; I just thought you did such a great job explaining various cults and I enjoyed how your voice is so calm and pleasant to listen to.
Enjoy the hectic first months with your little one. They’re infants so briefly 🥲
(And get lots of pictures of her newborn face/head/toes - these also change so quickly!!) ❤
Thank you so much! ❤ yes, I plan to take ALL the pics!! 😁
Your mom is wonderful. You’re so lucky you found out at a time in life where you could adjust and enjoy life.
Absolutely agree ❤
Tuning in from Vegas!
Put $10 on red for me 😜
I love hearing your journey. I just listened to the podcast and cried laughed and enjoyed. You did say something about needing a therapist I don’t want to push or anything like that but I have been working with a non Mormon therapist. He is the best thing that ever happened to me. I am willing to share his number if you’re interested. He is kind of expensive but well worth it. I know he can help you. I am still on my journey leaving Mormonism and not feeling guilty for it all. I was also abused and understand the guilt around that as a Mormon. Anyway you’re beautiful inside and out. And so happy I found your podcast. Good luck with your family. Happy for your arrival of your baby. Such a great time in your life. ❤️💙💜
SHELISE! I have been watching your channel since the beginning and I learned so much more about you in this interview. You are a very multifaceted person. Beautiful and very talented young lady
Thank you so much!!❤❤❤
@@CultstoConsciousness literally watching your psychedelics video right now. It's So fascinating
I totally appreciate Shalise!! Another favorite Podcaster!! Thank you, John, for this great interview 😊
Thank you for supporting!❤
Funny story my great grandpa was descended from one of the lines that ended up in Utah, and there is actually a little town outside of Salt Lake that is named after my family. He ended up leaving the Mormon church and moved to Colorado and married my great grandma!
I relate and that is without the Mormon aspect. I had a female friend that took me to Navoo and introduced me to Hoseph Smith and why she left the church. Eye opening. Thank you for your visit today. I’ll get your book. Love❤
Shelise is the best!!! Love her, she’s such an inspiration to me
Thanks. I was diagnosed recently. It's nice to get the perspective of others with FND. I hope your health has improved since you posted this video.
Love Shelise and Cults to Consciousness
You are such a wonderful person, Shelise. I wish all the best for you and for your family. I hope you and your husband will have a great time getting to know your daughter.
Love love love Shelise!!
Looking forward to this ♥️
I just met John at the gym hes such a sweet soul just by his energy being in a mixed faith marriage can be so lonely thank you mormon stories for making me feel like my story is not just happening to me 😢
Two of my favorite youtubers 😊
I love this girl! I've been listening to her for a very long time. Be happy and enjoy life!!! ♥️
Such a beautiful story. I am a big fan of Shelise's channel and her work. It was really amazing to hear your story.
Shelise is such an amazing woman. Love her channel. Didn’t know her full story, am so glad she made it through those tough times. She is such an inspiration on so many levels.
Im so glad her mother got out with her and shes not cut off from her family.
You are a born storyteller!
We love you Shelise ❤
🥰🙏
Shelise experiences in school really spoke to me. I'm not from Utah, but I was raised in the south in a heavily Southern Baptist area.
I often got singled out when it came to dress code too. There would be other girls around who were wearing...what teenage girls wore in the 2000s. Belly shirts, spaghetti straps, low rise jeans that showed their whale tales.
Where as if I wore anything that showed cleavage, I'd get pulled into the principal's office and forced to either change into my shirt for gym or call my mom to bring me something else.
Once, after a summer when I worked outdoors, I'd gotten really tan and lost a few pounds so I felt almost good about my body for the first time...really ever...so I wore this one pair of shorts I had that were short but passed the fingertip test. One of my teachers pulled me aside and didn't make me go to the office for dresscode, but instead she gave me a lecture about how short my shorts were and how she'd noticed that I'd been wearing more risque things ('risque' being a top that showed a little cleavage) and that it was really disappointing because "I know you're better than that!"
For context, I was also a perfectionist teenager who'd never gotten into any trouble and had straight A's. And I also had body dysmorphia so I wasn't of the opinion that I was ever good enough or attractive enough!
Which is ironic because, looking back, I think my body was the reason I was singled out. I was a straight A student but not a popular kid...more the nerdy type of A student than the popular golden girl type. I was, however, tall and curvy. I'm the type that puberty hit like a tsunami and I went right from girls sizes to womens, skipping juniors entirely. I could get into R rated movies without anyone blinking an eye from age about 14.
So I feel like the straight laced adults in my community felt that my body was, in a way, more threatening, because I was a child who could pass for a young woman, so maybe they did kind of think they were helping and protecting me since they realized there were people around that would sexualize me, but what they were really doing was teaching me to be even more ashamed of my body than I already was.
I love Shelise!!!! Her smile! Thank you.
@Shelise Sola you look amazing! You’re about to embark on the greatest journey in your life into motherhood. It’s the best thing you will ever do. All the best to you and yours!
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Every cultish system is so OBSESSED with controlling women and their bodies. I validate that it impacts men too. I’m not denying that. But there is a crazy amount of focus on managing women and the control of their bodies in all forms.
Shelise reminds me so much of the actress Lily Gladstone~both beauties and both possessing incredible personalities. I’m a big fan of both! ❤
I’m glad the guys dropped you from the original pod cast as you are so good to listen too and you would just be lost in a group setting . The fact that you are so honest and up front that is so good ❤
I'm not able to put a thumbs up so here it is👍I'm glad i caught the podcast GREAT JOB TO ALL..
All the best to you all 5!!
I'm surprised to not have heard the name Rick Alan Ross on this channel. He is known as a cult de-programmer and testified as an expert witness against Keith Raniere (NXIVM cult leader). Ross' book, Cults Inside Out: How People Get In And Can Get Out was instrumental in my realization that my experience in LDS Family Services as a client was destructive. John, you should consider having him on!
Wow, just a stunning interview. The Dream Team all together! Y'all are helping so many people, of so many different backgrounds and experiences. This is beautiful and thank you so much❤
Shelise is so entertaining and charming.
I am so happy she and here Mom left, they have so much to offer this world and were being crammed in a box and put on the shelf. ❤ She is absolutely glowing while pregnant. Her insides match her outsides. ❤ Beautiful.
all the best for you, your family and your little one on your new Journey as a Mom Shelise
What a wonderful episode!
The way I've watched/listened to Cults to Consciousness for so long, this was the first time I had the time to really dig into Shelise's story. I can't believe hearing about her being a designer on tv shows I watched as a kid
Oh wow, John talking about the Baptist churches around him as a kid doing 'cults' seminars brings back 1990s memories of my Baptist chruch doing a "Religions to Beware Of" class for my youth group. Also love that Oscar Meyer came from Nick Jr.; I never knew that and have been watching CtC most of its time online!
Love this girl!! She looks beautiful! Motherhood suits her!!
I found Y'all and Growing Up Mormon through Shelise....❤congratulations on your first little one Y'all ❤
Great session…helping all of us to heal, mental prison is such an accurate statement. Thank you so much.
i absolutely adore shelize she really is an amaziing interviewer
Thank you! I really appreciate that!❤
Shelise is amazing 🤩 ❤❤ this was a great interview! Interviews like this helped me deconstruct my own culty fundamentalist religious upbringing. It has been so painful but I am getting stronger every and it’s all because of episodes like this one ❤
I’m so happy to hear that it’s helpful!❤ you’re not alone
Such a great interview! Shelise--you are so smart and articulate and I'm so happy that you were able to follow your interests on your own terms instead of being told what your potential is. Thank you for sharing your story!
🎉Thank you Shelise for this revealing interview. I listened over on your channel too and I learned more about your meaningful journey today. You are doing a lot for all survivors of sexual abuse with your work. Please keep going. Have you heard of the yt channel What love is this? That's how I first heard of the atrocities in the Mormon cult. I almost became a Mormon. I was baptized at about 45 but just could not go through with it. I thank you for confirming my decision.
Thank you so much ❤ I haven’t heard of them but will look into it.