Your video reminds me of the old saying ... When you’re 20 you care what everyone thinks, when you’re 40 you stop caring what everyone thinks, when you’re 60 you realize no one was ever thinking about you in the first place.
I am a man who crochets. I've crocheted in public. If my wife is at a Drs appt, I might be sitting in the waiting area working on a crochet project. During a long bus ride, I crochet. I get looks. I couldn't care less. - The light in our living room comes mostly from large, clear Christmas lights that we leave up 365 days a year - I paint rather poorly and display my work with great pride - my wife makes more money than I do and I'm not ashamed, I'm quite proud of her accomplishments - I, too, like to wear the same thing all the time. - Ketchup is for meat and eggs, I like ketchup on steak, even really good steak. This upsets some cooks, but I reckon they get over it eventually. It's not my problem. - I never had a career, just a long series of widely varied jobs. I've never found anything that I would like to do for the rest of my life, so I switch industries when I feel like it. I've been a body guard, factory worker, bus driver, accountant, customer service rep, writer, carpenter, to name a few. Now I'm 54 and learning to be a truck driver. I want to experience all the things I can. - Here's to breaking the molds! Edit: I've gotten so much kick back for changing jobs, so I'm gonna explain - not to defend me - but to educate you: I have been working since I was 8 years old. My first job was in a factory and by the time I was 14, I was making $3.25 an hour. I had no opportunity for college. During my teen and young adult years, I had to take whatever job would hire me - I had no choices. In my mid twenties I became a single dad so I continued to take whatever job paid the best. I wasn't attached to any of the jobs, so I changed whenever I found something that I was qualified for that also paid a little bit more. Money has always been a motivating factor for me - a job paying $20 an hour is much more interesting to me than a job paying $7.50. If I had stayed a factory worker for life, it would never have turned into a six figure income. Same for a bus driver, carpenter, etc. Sticking with any one of my past jobs would never have made me successful in the way that our culture thinks I should be - and each of my job changes has resulted in better income for me. Right now I'm a local truck driver and it's the best money I have ever made - however it is seasonal and the company's top end pay is $30 an hour - so if I find something that interests me that pays $35, you better believe that I'll be changing jobs again. My wife didn't marry me for money, she knew I'd work and that I often have more than one job at a time. She knew that my credit score was above 750, that I have no debt, and my bills are paid. She married me because I'm an honest, compassionate, loving man who treats her with the utmost respect. (I just gotta say that I love that my comment has brought this much activity to Silver and Solo's channel. I really appreciate her and I know the activity will benefit her - this is awesome!)
It’s funny how if a man says “I’m an artist who works in fiber arts”, then this is accepted. But-if a man says “I crochet as a hobby” that that’s somehow weird or wrong. I say we should normalize both genders doing whatever they love! (Like women in woodworking, etc.) More power to you! 🧶
I've found that being a happily single woman after 50 really seems to irritate other people. After years of being everyone's caretaker, it's finally MY TURN to take care of myself! Why is that so hard for some people to understand??
@@girlienerd I too have found that it seems to upset many people that I am content with being alone and living a simple quiet life. I cannot understand why it should be so.
What you see is what you get. I don't even wear a bra anymore. At 83 I don't give a rat's ass what other people think. Comfort is the prime driver. Good food, soft easy to wash clothes and good shoes. Warm fleecy things a size bigger than the norm and baggy sweats. Wake up at 3 bedtime at 7 or 8. Sleep with my cat. Eat a whole box of popsicles if I feel like it. Life is short. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Meaningless social encounters and parties bore me to death. I don't even have jewelry or party clothes.
I'm 50 and agree with you 100% I wonder about your comment on "meaningless social encounters" and what it means....do you stay away from people more now or do you try to make ALL your encounters mean something? I ask because I feel I have more and more as I age gravitated towards making ALL encounters meaningful and by that I don't mean I divulge my life in detail to everyone I encounter but that I try or maybe try isn't even the right word but rather it's been more NATURAL feeling to make "mini" meaningful connections with most people these days......I like it and find it enriching🙂
I have been with my partner for 14 years, we don't live together and each have our own homes, we will never marry, have not mixed finances and have every intention of staying together until one of us passes. We date, go on holidays together and our families treat us as a couple. Most people think we're odd but it works for us.
I’m 70, a single woman all my life, and happily so. I’m always annoyed by the people who insist that I’m not “complete” without a man. If you are not whole in yourself, no one else is going to be able to complete you, and you will lose yourself trying to complete them.
A relationship never works for long when one person needs the other person to be "whole". I was married ( babysat) 26 years for a woman that refused to take on any attempt to grow up.
@@mooshygirl 😊 I do want to say, I have nothing against marriage, but it needs to be a balanced relationship. The union of two wholes can absolutely be greater than the sum of its parts, but never compromise your own wholeness.
I think I’ve found my people-and quite frankly, I’m shocked. Reading some of these comments is INCREDIBLY validating, because I see myself! Up at 4am, in bed by 7. Not married. No kids. Shaved my head over 5 years ago, and will never grow my hair out again. I don’t date. I have few friends. I spend my time crocheting, going to the YMCA to swim, and pursuing whatever I find interesting. Yes, it’s a bit lonely now and then, but I consider that a fair trade off for the freedom I receive in return. I no longer have to live up to anyone else’s expectations of me-and I’m just finding peace in being financially stable and independent. Thank you so much for this vid and channel!
What you describe is my worst nightmare. Sure, I could be alone forever, but I deserve a family. I have more to offer and more to gain. I can be alone when I'm dead. I'm not gonna cop out and say, "At least I have my freedom!" That's what a 19 year old says to cope with living in the dorms.
Isn't it a bit of work to shave your head to keep it shaved? I'm curious. Probably takes less time than keeping up with a man bun? Because that's the only alternative I see for men that don't cut their hair at all. Low maintenance to the max.
@@bitrudder3792 I was very self-conscious when I started putting my hair up. I don't like the look, but there's no damn way I'm gonna keep my head, face, or pubes trimmed up on a regular basis. It just doesn't matter.
As a 28 yr old, this video was very affirming for me! I am single, not lonely, and not looking. One social norm I buck, and care less and less about each day, is I will regularly sit outside in my car to eat lunch at work. I call it my introvert intermission. I cannot possibly talk work with people all day and then also small talk over lunch… nope, I go outside and have some brief solitude in the middle of my day.
I have always either came home or had lunch in my car! (I’m 65) Also single by choice- can’t tolerate people in my home. Love to socialize though, and come home to peace!
That’s such a nice break. I worked for 29 years and took my breaks in the break room with coworkers and many interruptions. It was in a hospital so no peace from the noises nearby. Yet I did that for 29 years. Most often I wasn’t refreshed after a break. You are very smart to take “alone” time for your lunch. Luckily I’m retired now and my life is pretty peaceful so I’m making up for it.
I’m going to borrow your “Introvert Intermission” - I so need & do this too - what a fantastic name for it! My job is in customer service by phone & I truly enjoy it (100% because of the company I am so, so blessed to work with/for) but after talking all day, the last thing I want to do is call someone & talk on the phone - even with family. I didn’t include this in my main comment, but I get up way earlier on purpose to have at least 2-3 hours alone, in the dark, before my day really starts. Yes as an over 60 yr old I do fall asleep 🤣 but my introvert nature needs this!
i am kinda the same but its not talking about work i dislike its talking to idiots or average people with nothing in common with me. but since your 28 be careful about what a 60 year old lady says she seems like the normal case of a cat lady that hit the wall and learned to live with her choices. she seems to be doing fine but most don't. i am assuming your a woman though, if your a man you do not need to worry about anything i just said.
@@bleepbloop101010101 lol - 6 months of power !! I hear this being invisible as you age - but invisible to who though? maybe 18 year old men - although my 18 year old grandson loves me and I see him and he sees me. Invisible to who? Our friends, our family, our neighbours? The woman at the grocery store, the person you work with - are you invisible to them? I think it will be good when that saying is phased out - as life is enjoyable and a blessing at many ages !!
I am ignoring how I should act and what I should like as a Black woman. I have never fit the stereotype and this has always annoyed people in the Black (AND Brown) community. I also don't feel ashamed for being a divorcee.
Good for you! I just hate how society tries to put everyone in a box based off their skin color too. They expect you to think and act or vote a certain way and if you don’t they resort to name calling. I think the powers at be are just wanting us to fight and not get along or control us. God forbid you think for yourself. I’m a divorced woman and even caught flack from my own family and friends asking me why I don’t find another partner so I don’t end up alone. They just don’t get some people are happy being single.
I love your lifestyle. I am 65 and I no longer accept the norm any longer! Had a doctor appointment today (new patient consultation), and my appointment time was 2:30. After waiting 1 hour, I left. No one came in the exam room to check on me, explain the delay or even see if I was doing OK. So, at 3:35, I opened the exam room and left. I gave no explanation, just walked out! My time is valuable to me.
Same thing happ To me last week. After trying for 2 days to see go, surgery rang and said dr will squeeze you in . I was there in 10 mins. After waiting for one and half hours, I went to reception, and told them how rude the dr was, and left! Went to a private surgery near me and had my ear problem sorted in 15 mins! It cost me £65, but money well spent. Like you, my time is too precious to be messed around! Greetings from UK❤️🇬🇧
This. I'm 45 now and have done that very same thing a few times over the last decade as well. I love virtual visits now even tho I find technology incredibly frustrating.. But at least I'm at home whilst waiting.
My husband taught his doctor how to not make him wait the first time he became his patient: he left too & he’s never kept him waiting since. I on the other hand have more patience as I have worked in medical care & know that there are truly authentic / legit causes to offices running late essentially daily but I think the issue is that there is often an imbalance of respect for patients’ time & actual financial penalties imposed for lateness & more (🇨🇦). If we were permitted to impose our own financial penalties & actually by law be paid, wouldn’t it be interesting how short the wait could be in many industries (when it’s caused by frivolous reasons)?!? I think you gave way more wait time than they deserved & applaud you!
Whenever I go to an appointment, to a restaurant to meet someone, etc., I bring a book. While waiting, I read. Sometimes the book turns out to be so good that I want to be called late or for the person to show up late.
I did that once, they took me to the exam room and after about an hour, I got up and left . They did call me later that afternoon and I explained to them, that I waited for over an hour, no one came, so I left, and told them they would be getting a bill from me for wasting my time, to get there, and back home and my time waiting...😂
I was shattered when my husband died, absolutely devastated. I still miss him, but I absolutely love my life. I moved to a coastal area, ditched all my old furniture and decorated this home exactly as I wanted to. The last 6 years is the first time in my life I've ever lived alone, I lived with my parents, I had a couple of flatmates, and I got married. The freedom I have to either cook a meal, have Vegemite on toast or order takeaway is amazing. If I want to go to bed at 2am I will, if I want to go to bed at 9pm I will. Truly I love my life.
@@joycej9415 yes, I absolutely understand. My husband and I were like that. It's why I still miss him. I used to work in live television I used to be gone 3 nights every month. ,and he was the kids caregiver. He made sure everything was done just as I would have done it. The only differences we ever had were meals, I liked to eat early he liked to eat late, but he was the cook so I went along with it 😅. But even though our marriage was mutual respect and mutual love. One still has to be considerate to the other person. Nowadays I have no one to consider in any way whatsoever. As I say, I still miss him, but the absolute freedom I have now really is insanely wonderful.
My husband of 40 yrs passed away last fall. For first time in my life I am alone. And I am enjoying it. My grown daughter who is high on the spectrum lives with me, but she goes to work and then hides in her room. I wear the same few things all the time. I eat what I want, when I want. I am retiring this summer at 62 and will travel as I feel like. If I want to stay up all night, I will. I nap most afternoons. By product of working night shift for 30 years. I don't wear make up. I don't waste money on fancy nails, shoes or clothes. I enjoy my own company and am happy to be alone most of the time.
Single BW in my fifties whose lived my entire life in various phases of conformity and now complete non-conformity. I don't go to church (gasp, horror, as a BW pearls will be clutched on this one), but I believe in a higher power. I'm an introvert and a loner so I eschew any notion of having large social gatherings over my house. Every room in my house is mine, lol, no designated guest rooms anymore. I am currently planning to spend holidays away from family and friends in my hometown and spending time away from the hustle and bustle of the holidays with a different set of friends at a vacation destination. No decorations, no holiday meal prep, just relaxing with friends on the beach, resting and reading. No wrapping paper, or shopping for gifts. I work just enough to live and spend my time off peacefully getting as much rest time as possible. I wear the same comfortable clothes over and over again. Wash, rinse, repeat. I order groceries for pick up, food on delivery if I don't feel like shopping or cooking. Basically I look at all the busy BW around me and I do the exact opposite and I don't cave to others norms and expectations. I live in peace ☮️.
BW = Black Woman. The expectation that they attend church and open their homes to large family gatherings that involve much food buying, preparation (with old family recipes that everyone loves) and mounds of clean up and holiday activity. This lady is opting out of the hullabaloo for a Peaceful holiday with others. Perhaps she is an introvert and is eschewing the whole Holiday madness theme. Christmas should be Peaceful. I myself have tried to discourage the whole gift-giving thing (not because I am a stingy Grinch) but because I am the youngest in my family on one side, 58, just like Jan aka Silver&Solo. We don’t need another blessed thing in my townhouse! My parents don’t need anything. Neither does my aunt and uncle. But I get outvoted every year for the gift exchange. I’ve finally found out people’s favorite restaurants and simply given gift certs. Everyone still likes to eat ! 🙅🏼♀️
You’re my hero. I’m comfortable with myself . I’m married, but astonishingly, he’s the same. He’s comfortable with himself. We give each other enormous room. Don’t bother with holidays. Just peaceful. ❤❤❤
I’m 59 and I don’t want to attend family functions anymore even funerals. Only my child or husband that’s it. Tired of doing things for others to make them happy. Stopped setting myself on fire to keep others warm.
52, single, never married, no children and I LOVE my dog! I moved 18 hours away from family and friends to a state in which I’d never visited and I do not know a single soul…been here 6 years. It’s the best thing I’ve done for myself in a very long time.
@@TarasSimpleCrochet not being tugged in every direction, not feeling like I have to run to everyone’s events, I am no longer the go to person for EVERYONE and EVERYTHING. I feel free.
Ohhhh, I’ve been researching moving out of state far, far away myself. I read your comment and my heart skipped a beat. Lots to do to get the ball rolling, but I think I’m motivated. Glad you found a place that you’re happy with. All the best!!
At 30 I decided I no longer have to go to the movies to watch a movie I don't want to. At 40, I gave myself permission to no longer play "party games" at baby showers or wedding showers. I no longer wear dress shoes, I only wear Sketchers because they are comfortable. I own 4 pairs of them. I buy durable clothing and only wear white or black socks. I've had pretty much the same hairdo for 25 years. I stopped wearing make-up around 4 years ago. That's me.
I quit going to movie theaters when I was I found out one of our local theaters was infested with bed bugs! No thanks. I’ll stay home and pop my own popcorn and watch movies instead. There’s not really anything worth going to see anymore anyway with the garbage they put out.
@@jaustill237 - I do the black sock thing also! For a long time it was about the black sneakers I wore with my scrubs, which often had black pants. then the black legging era. But I don't wear socks very much anymore now that I'm not going into clinical situations anymore (because I don't wear face diapers either). So it's sandals, and bare feet, and occasionally flats that I take off as soon as reasonably possible. Oh, and some ugly crocs because I can hose the mud off of them from the garden. Or painted them without worrying about paint getting on them.
@@pj123xyz - you are so right about the quality of the movies. I just sit and pick them apart for predictive programming these days. But sometimes I like to go by myself to the theater and sit in the first or second row and stare straight up at the giant screen. This doesn't happen often, but it is definitely something that I do by myself because other people won't do it. movies at home… I don't even watch movies so much anymore, although these serial TV shows are kind of like movies. Pause buttons are awesome, so my joints don't get too stiff from sitting too long in one place! And I don't miss anything for a bathroom break. And the snacks are way better and a lot cheaper! What's not to love about movie night at home???!!!!
YES to the skip the shower games! I hate those and finally learned to say “no thanks” when they pass the paper and pencils. YES to Skechers! YES to black and white socks.
I am a 42 year old African woman, unmarried, celibate and childless. I sometimes feel guilty for being this happy. I need to breath out and let myself be. I loved the video where you told us to let go of trying to be at the top of the career ladder. I get paid well enough, i have invested my money and i keep healthy at the gym but could do better with my food intake. I love your channel. There is so much more to life than chasing after top jobs and placing not so great men on pedestals. At this moment i am travelling, drinking wine, drinking water and learning to use primer and concealer
I'm a 58 yo woman and I've been divorced since I was in my late twenties. My son is grown and I'm an introvert, so I enjoy my own company. I have popcorn for dinner if I want and I haven't decorated for Christmas in almost ten years. I live in a small southern town and am seen as an odd duck because I don't care to gossip with the neighbors.
You're not the Lone Ranger I will do a crazy pattern like that for a month or two then switch over to something entirely different and just as crazy That's My life nowadays I'm in my late 70s I live alone and have been living alone and continue to want to live alone the rest of my life❤ I love it no one I have to worry about feeding no one I have to worry about taking care of no one I have to listen to no one I have to shop for no one I have to clean after❤ etcetera❤ now what's wrong with that ? 😂.. I'm not gliding From Misery.
I do what I want to when I want to call I want to and if I can afford it nobody here telling me what to do nobody here for me to do for no one here I have to try to please at my expense thank God❤ what's wrong with that ?😂
I love being awake at 3am.... I get more stuff done between 3 and 6 am than at any other time of day. No phone calls, no one bothers you. It is peaceful and I like watching the day dawn.....and I have the happiest birds ever in my neighborhood.
@@paulkiefer5455 I always hated it, the faux bonhomie, horrible family gatherings, wasted paper and plastic junk that just goes to landfills later on, what a crock of BS.
My husband and I have always slept apart in our own rooms! I love the space and quiet. We are affectionate and make time for quality time together etc. No resentment about lost sleep, disturbed sleep. Our friends and family think it's weird, but I think they are just sleep deprived and irritable haha. Also, these days I don't suffer fools anymore or subject myself to the company of people who don't treat me with love and respect. Even family. It has been hard but I realised I have to do this to protect my sanity from toxic family members. I'm 42 now and reaching mid life and perimenopause has helped me reevaluate my priorities in life. Loved this video, thanks.
My husband and I have separate beds in the same room. He moves around a ton and I am a super light sleeper. If we had more room separate rooms would be great. My cousins and her husband have separate bedrooms and I am super envious of them!
@@faeriesmak Same here, we have always slept separately. When people find out they get so nosey and start asking intimate questions. I always say, "wow, why would you ask something like that?" That usually makes them stop. I don't see them again after that. I don't suffer fools now.
I am 42 and have never been married. I enjoy living quietly, reading, watching whatever I want, eating, whatever I want, and not answering to anyone. I find most social rules, exhausting and don’t really have patience for them. I’ve been told all of my life. I am abnormal, it’s nice to finally find my people.
Amen to that! Never want to clean-up after a man ever again. My ex-husband didn't have the same standards of cleanliness and organization. And even though he didn't expect me to clean up after him, I did anyway because I couldn't stand the mess. I'm so glad I have less estrogen now (presumably) and could not care less about having a man in my life.
all I can say is that personally I love HRT ( no history of estrogen linked cancer in my family ) and NOT for men. I an more cheerful, have more energy, easier to keep my weight down and my self styled orgasms are great! ; )
you are missing out on love and fun and intimacy! I'm 64 and my new husband is 41. and, what makes me want him and stay fit and fabulous is my HRT. low estrogen wrecked me. I've been on HRt for almost 15 years, and I look 20 years younger, and feel like I did before I had my kids at age 35. I always want a man in my life! a younger one *wink
I can soooo relate! I’m a 56-year old German who has had a long complicated transcontinental relationship that ended just when everything would have been okay to think of next steps financially and living-wise (yes, it was complicated), which unfortunately also coincided with the end of my child-bearing years. Needless to say that after 17 years of these complications, I did not really feel like hooking up with anyone initially. Then fate struck. I lost my brother (with whom I had bought a house as he was in a similar situation) and then both of my parents. I am now fixing up my parents’ house to move in while I am planning to sell the larger house I had bought with my brother and I am by now really happy and content with my life. Sure, I would have loved to have children, but just yesterday, I was thinking to myself, how very comfortable and happy I am with the ay things are; that I am really happy that I do not have any responsibilities outside of myself. Sure, it is somewhat sad that my pedigree ends with me and that I will not be able to pass on family lore and heirlooms, but seriously, who really cares? I, like you, need a lot of me-time and no longer WANT to work my way around and age-appropriate partner with baggage of his own. I love that if I don’t feel like it, I don’t have to cook and simply have leftovers or nothing at all. I love that I can work on art an crafts until late at night and don’t have to justify my whims to anyone. I love my life, which turned out very different from what I had planned as a young girl, but I don’t regret anything… Embrace what life throws your way…
When you were talking about wedding china and silver, oh and glassware, I thought I would share my latest pet peeve. Okay, all these young people getting married who, inside the invitation, enclose their list of wants. Usually I laugh, and ignore. Even if I don’t laugh, I ignore. Because honey, let me tell you this….you and your intended spouse have lived together for 4 yrs. You just moved into your custom built home. You drive very nice cars. You have the gall to ask me for 2 gifts. So in addition to the 8 cocktail glassware you want me to buy, you also expect me to pay for 1 night at your honeymoon retreat. Oh, HELL NO!! I need to stop at the Dollar Tree tomorrow and buy a card. Because reasons.
@Songbirds3712...AMEN ! When couples started asking for "honeymoon experiences" I was done. If you have to ask invited guests to pay for your honeymoon it means YOU cant afford one.
I refuse to attend anymore weddings. The last bad experience did it for me. Freezing hall, horrendous inedible "food". lots of drunk guests, deafening loud music all through the wedding. Then I have to hand over a heafty some of cash for this mess to the bride and groom. No thank you. I'd rather stay home in peace.
I have been happily married for 18 years, have two wonderful teens, and a life built from scratch. One of my biggest regrets in life was creating a wedding registry, even at the time I felt ill thinking about the idea of making and sending the gift registry. My maid of honor, bless her, worked in the China department at BBB and her enthusiasm and rationalization for why we should tell people what to buy us was convincing, at the time. I wish I never made one.
I hate hot sunny weather so now I close my blinds in summer. I am so much happier and less stressed…and Also I avoid going outside during the day and you know the more you do what works for you, the more energetic and happy you feel!
75 this June, divorced 10 years this August after 35 years, living single, wake at 3ish and watch yt until I feel like rolling out of bed. Participate in various physical and art activities at the very active center. Put Snoopy Christmas shower curtain and other bathroom accessories up in July until whenever. Study languages, get lost in reading suspense books; attend art school out of state in the summer, cello and now guitar, volunteer only if I want to, take the top off my jeep and overall, keep it moving. Oh, I see the children, grands and nieces when they remember I’m still here and if I’m up to it. Everything at my leisure. Enjoy Life!
I love the “ volunteer “ only if you want to- my wife cannot stand all this volunteer because you are no longer “ relevant “ but we need your money or time to run “ our organization, school, foundation but you are not going to get paid for your time or effort…….forced volunteerism is slavery no matter what “ fuzzy words “ you may receive as a reward……..she helps when she wants to but knows how to say NO…….
I'm a guy. Your channel seems to appeal to the other half of the gene pool judging from the commenters. BUT I just love your down to earth attitudes and advicce. Lots of good stuff for all. Thanks, you're doing a great job.
I heartily agree. Most of my life this is what I desired. Now that I retired this is what I do too. Go to sleep late and get up late. It' feels,good. ❤
Leaving my toxic family and the abusive ex was liberating. I do what I want, when I want. I've been eating alone in restaurants for years, and it has truly never bothered me. I have a job I really like in an amazing part of the world, and I'm about to upgrade that. And I'm constantly having people tell me that they're envious. I tell them that they could do the same, and they swear they couldn't. Their loss.
I've never had a problem eating alone in any restaurant either. Baffled my ex who I think used to surveil me while he was having his affair (makes them think everyone is). Living alone grows character.
My husband is 82 and I am 81. We have already signed up to be body donors at a local medical school and we plan to have NO funerals! Our children are all on board with our decisions-we didn’t ask, we told them. If our friends and family want to honor us, they can do it now while we’re alive and we don’t intend to enrich the funeral corporations.
Are they really onboard if they were told? wwhen the grief hits them they may need to have that ritual to honour you or it may benefit them in their grief?
Seriously! My Mom died two years ago. My Dad and I had her cremated (and we shopped around for pricing🙀) with no funeral/urn/memorial bs. We’ll scatter her where and when we’re ready.
It's your corpse--you're just busy with it right now. Once you're done with it you can give it to someone else to do anything they want with it. It's nobody's business but yours what happens to your corpse, not even really your spouse's.
For forty-five years I have been a vegetarian and I have gotten a lot of flack for it from my family. I never wear a wedding ring. We never had china or silverware either. We sold our house because my husband did not want to maintain it and it stressed him out to own it. I have not had my hair cut professionally for twelve years. I have a couple of tops and jeans. I am a minimalist with only the things I use and love. I need solitude and hate gossip. I enjoyed this video and everyone's comments!
It's been about 30 years since I went to a hairdresser. It's curly and no one could even tell if it was unevenly cut, so I do it. I like my brown/grey color mix and a bun on top is super easy. Never would go short again.
I believe there is a conspiracy to keep us going to salons, mocking anyone who admits they cut their own hair. I say admits because you cannot tell who does and who doesn't. Even the most militant frugal RUclips channel stars do not cut and style their own. I don't like to be fooled with and I don't like having hair that looks like everyone else's.
I’m the only woman in my neighborhood who does the “men’s “ work: mowing, mulching, manually de thatching, raking, hedge trimming, pruning, tilling, planting, organic fertilizing, bird house and feeder building, shoveling snow and de icing. It’s great exercise and I enjoy it. Every other house around me has either a husband or hired help to do manual labor.
Same here. I have 1.5 acres and tons of trees. Lots to take care of. I've got a regular chainsaw, a pole saw, a de-thatcher, couple of wheelbarrows and a yard wagon, shovels and rakes galore, you name it. I was using a pitchfork earlier today because my pine trees dropped a bunch of needles, and I mean a LOT, in the last couple years. Got myself a couple "haystacks" going on. LOL I enjoy trimming my own trees and cutting off dead branches. Unfortunately, the poor trees always look like they have a bad haircut. haha
I used to do all the yardwork even with my son, nephew, and boyfriend in the house. I just liked the exercise and being outdoors. Now I outsource the yardwork and only do my sidewalks during the winter, and have my plow guy do my long driveway. Do whatever works the best for you!
I’ve always done the yard work, landscaping…and any small “ fix it” jobs around the house ( including furniture assembly). My husband just doesn’t like any of it…so it’s up to me. I like to keep busy and feel good when I’m done. I did these things when hubby worked so just kept doing it…even though he is now retired.
Good for you! When my lawn guy told me that he was raising his rates per cut, I didn't sign up. I have 2 acres of land with lots of trees and it's not flat. Well, I got out my gas push lawn mower and did it myself I saved money and got a great workout. Similarly, I am the only house in my area who has a female yard person....me! I crack up when I see my nieghbors husbands on their sitting mower while I'm powering away with my own strength.
I'm 50 years old. I don't go to funerals because it's "expected of me." If I feel the desire to go, I'll go, but unlike my parent's generation I don't see the point in going to a funeral to "show respect" or to "represent the family." I liked your video and I appreciate your attitude! Thanks!
On sleep cycles, been a "night owl" all my life. I'm 63, have had to get up early for jobs of course, never really adjusted, just tired all the time. I can now follow my natural sleep cycle and feel so much better physically. I no longer care about the negative judgement from many morning people toward night owls. ( lazy, somehow irresponsible, "unwilling" to get up early etc.) They would feel awful staying up until 12:30 or 1:00 am every night, I feel awful getting up early.
Night owl since birth! My mother worked in a factory and had to be there by 7:00 am. As a single mother, she had to "deal" with me when she got off work because I was wide awake. My babysitter loved me because I slept all day while my mother was at work. At night while my poor mother tried to sleep, I'd figured out a way to jiggle the crib and turn it into a slide. I'd roll out and go on big adventures around her apartment. She almost had a nervous breakdown trying to figure out what was wrong with me. The doc said some babies are just born with broken clocks! I've had to conform to the morning world most of my life. Now that I'm (gulp) 65, I'm not retired but I mostly work from home. I barely make it but I HATE getting up to an alarm clock. Doc appointments and lunch dates are always after 1:00 pm. And I take a nap when my body is tired.
I'm a night owl too! The judgement is terrible, it's a relic from the industrial revolution when everyone was expected to work in a factory. It is archaic and needs to end, as long as the work gets done it shouldn't matter when it gets done!
Been a night owl all my life and fought the rest of the world’s schedule all my life until retirement. Go to bed at 2 am and get up when I awake naturally whether 8 am or more likely 10 or 11 am. And if I fall asleep for a nap in the afternoon, well yep that’s fine too. It’s wonderful!
@@robingentry6987 Same, but my "clock" seems to drift. I sometimes end up going to bed at 3am or even 6 or 7am! Especially if I'm up all night online. (I might have a "problem". Heh-heh.) A clock radio (remember those?) saved me from alarm clocks when i was 12, but now I'm not on anyone's time schedule so I wake when I wake. I've been leaving the blinds up to "wake with the light" (but I'll sleep through if I went to bed late). At least it's a _gentle_ waking, which is mainly what I was after. I've always told people, "I'm at my best 2pm to 2am". On my first contract job, when I felt comfortable coming in later and working later, I had a button I sometimes wore on my coat lapel: "Bright or Early Choose One" Love that.
I have aspergers and Im a male in my 40s. Im a nurse so i wear scrubs to work and I own no "fancy" clothes at all. I wear sweatpants, sometimes jeans, everywhere...if a place requires more than that I dont go there, and I have no desire to go to places like that anyway. I will never attend another wedding or other big social event. I dont like crowds and do not see any purpose to social rituals or protocols. My BFF is a lesbian who is ~16 years younger, and I wholeheartedly choose that (very supportive) relationship over any romantic relationship. I talk/text with her daily and spend time with her weekly but I cant spend too much time with any one person no matter how much I enjoy their occasional company, and if Im in a relationship that requires me to give up too much "myself alone time" I get miserable and resentful of that person, no matter how much I care about them. I live with another female friend Ive had since highschool who is as solitary a person as I am, if not moreso. I need to be on my own schedule, able to do what I want when I want (at least during my days off from work). On paper, I look like a directionless slacker who plays a lot of video games (oh and D&D), is single with no kids and no ambition to climb career/social ladders...but Im actually a very successful nurse with a previous B.S. degree, I love nature and cycling, and Im a financially stable homeowner, it doesnt bother me when people sometimes treat me like Im "a manchild" because I know Im a hard worker, and I am pretty much wholly satisfied with how my life is set up right now.
Im like the remale version of you, and my partner is similar to you too. Relationships are easier when you are both on the same wavelength. maybe its just an autism thing, i dont know.
People keep asking me why I don't get my masters. I'm 61 and tired. I make enough to live comfortably and that's enough for me. Some of my coworkers are still climbing the career ladder around my age and I'm like "when are you going to relax and actually live?" I guess that makes me a slacker, lol.
I don't know if it's a social norm or not, but being unwilling/afraid to go out by myself. When I tell someone I'm planning on doing something, I'm always asked 'who are you going with?' and when told I'm going alone I get 'oh, I could NEVER go to a movie/concert/restaurant/whatever else by myself!'. I take week-long road trips by myself!
I'm 58 and work from home, and I have adopted the "uniform" of black turtlenecks and black pull-on pants. I love not having to fret about what to wear anymore. I'm comfortable and coordinated--they're Garanimals for grownups! (Gen Xers who remember Garanimals, give a shoutout for matching the tags!) Thank you for being you, and sharing your positivity, insight, and humor with us.
Haha! Garanimals for adults - love it. I wish they would have had something like that when I was a young adult. It would have saved me so much time and effort and stress.
I wear pajamas all the time. I wear a dress to work in my yard because I live in Texas and it's hot. I get up in the morning in my pajamas work in the yard in my pajamas if not a dress. Then I take a shower and put on clean pajamas the only time I put on day clothes is when I'm leaving the house my friend says I'm the only one she's ever looked for a dress to work in the yard in as a gift
I’m in my sixties and I appreciate the concept of this video. Norm 1: Dishes and cupboards - When we renovated the kitchen, I thought that it would be most practical to forego new cupboards and just install two dishwashers. I already load and unload the dishwasher. Why do we bother with the extra steps of putting dishes in cupboards and taking them out of cupboards? Label the dishwashers. One would hold clean dishes and as I used them I would put them away in the second dishwasher. When dishwasher two was full, I could run the load and then that becomes the source of clean dishes for a couple of days. My wife did not go for the idea, but I have an uncle who did. Norm 2: I rarely answer my door when a stranger rings. Norm 3: Like you, I don’t have guest stuff. Our last stay over visitors came about eight years ago. The spare bedroom is now a gym. No need to have that equipment in the basement. I like to see out the window. (Spare bedroom three is an office.) Norm 4: In the summer, we cook a load of chicken breasts and don’t turn the oven on again for a couple of weeks. No AC, so we don’t want to heat the house unnecessarily. We eat the same tasty meals pretty much every single day anyway.
I have been planning my retirement home and the kitchen will have two dishwashers. They are more space efficient than the traditional cupboard and cabinets and are actually less expensive than most high end cabinets! A double win! Some kitchen cabinets are needed. But not twelve linear feet of them! I am rethinking many of the features of this home that is for an older version of me.
@@piktormusic2538 I have been pricing out new cabinets. The second dishwasher is far less expensive than good cabinets and takes up less space! I will have some cabinets that will be used for pots and pans and the overflow when one of the dishwashers is maxed out and I need a little extra room to keep something
60, married and childless by choice. Painted our walls rich jewel tones. I loath the phrase, “be nice now”. I have a kind heart and gentle hands. I eat off my good china everyday.
Each room in our 1200 sq ft house is 3 colors. Think, deep turquoise with lighter turquoise on the opposite 2 walls. We are lousy painters, but everyone is too busy looking at the colors to notice. 😅
Im a very independent 58 yr old woman. I love repairing things myself. Electrical, woodworking, plumbing..you name it. I also like to sew and knit. Was married at a young age but have been single for many years and loving it. I dont have any interest in dating. I am living my best life doing what i please and spending my hard earned money on what i want withouth having to explain. Pinapple and ham on pizza is yummy! Glad to find so many like minded people out there. 😊
I found your comments on rising at 3:00 AM and going to bed at 7:00 PM interesting. I have never been a morning person. When my husband was alive, I tried to keep his schedule but after my husband passed a year ago, I have slowly worked myself into a schedule that allows me to sleep so much better. It is just the opposite of yours. I go to bed at 2:00 AM and get up at about 9:00 AM. It just seems to be what my body wants. I have a niece who lives on Vancouver Island. It is beautiful there. They live in an old house in Brentwood Bay. My sister who is 94 married a Canadian. I live in coastal North Carolina. I love your channel and watch all your postings. I am loving living alone. I loved my husband dearly, but he created a noisy household. I miss him, but not the TV. I have decided this is my time.
The lockdowns and social distancing were a great time for many people to discover what they truly want and don't want. Personally, I am now more me than I ever was before.
I preferred it. I stay home and when I go out I'd like people to stay 6 feet away from me, stop unnecessary talking and get out of the way. Your squealing children are sooo hideous
Although I’m in a long term relationship of 13 years, (after a horrible 13.5 year marriage prior), I will not ever marry this man. lol. That sounds terrible. Not because he is horrible…he is lovely and sweet. But because the convention didn’t work for me the first time, nor him. We own a home together, keep all other finances separate, sleep in separate rooms, have separate hobbies, and adore each other. Pretty darn happy this way. ❤😊
My husband of 35 years passed away a couple of years ago. I was devastated and couldn't imagine how I would go on alone. Well, I have done just fine and am enjoying so many unexpected aspects of my new life! I'd always been a very traditional wife and mother. I decided to remodel my house and run around all the time in stained work clothes with no makeup. I'm always learning and trying new things now. I love the freedom living alone and getting older bring!
I’m also an “odd duck” and always have been. Have always lived life the way I chose/choose. Chose to marry and I did. Had children that I wanted. Have had a career which I am now leaving by my choice. Husband passed away when I was 52 and have been alone by choice since then. Can paint the house whatever color I want, eat what and when I want and soon will be able to get up when I want, go to bed all the time. I’m also with you on style. I’m so glad that there are more of us than I anticipated. Odd ducks unite!
I am 65, married, with adult children. This year I made the decision to move back into my own house in another area. I love having my own space, my own life…and peace. My husband is fully supportive. Our relationship is better than ever.
82 y.o. widow Live alone by choice Have a very special man in my life, we date, shop and see shows together. I have a good relationships with my grown children & extended family. I need help with a few things that I can't physically manage and my daughter who lives close helps me as needed. My life is good, and I am still down sizing. and decluttering from my more complicated past. I relate to your thoughts and lifestyle thanks for sharing
Meanwhile I have friends that are loathe to let out they have separate bedrooms. I would also need separate living situations. Chronically single by choice Quiet time in am is the best!
Separate houses sounds wonderful! I'm 67 and married 48 years this July. We've lived in the same house since we married. We're out of space. I've given up on keeping house because of his clutter and just joined him. I don't want to live this way and everyday I have visions of living alone. I really believe it's affecting my health. 😢
If I realize Im not enjoying a show , I just stop it midway through and turn the channel, who cares, nobody else is watching so why endure even a moment of a show I dont like or am not enjoying- such a luxury!
I never buy books or movies. I borrow them from the library because if something doesn't grab me soon, I don't waist my time at all. I enjoy Netflix for the same reason.
I don't have special towels, blankets, soaps, dishes, or silverware either. As I've gotten older, I realize every day I wake up is a special and precious day, so I'm using all of my "speacial" stuff now. Thanks for sharing! I truly enjoyed this video!
I grew up with the notion (or social norm) that 'fun' has to be earned. In other words, you don't get to start playing and enjoying yourself until or unless you get all your work/chores/obligations done FIRST. Now that I'm in my fifties I finally realize that this is nonsense. Being happy is a birthright and enjoying life isn't something you need to earn. IF I want to stay in my pajamas all day, read books and lay on the couch - that's what I do, guilt-free. Just to be clear; I'm not talking about abandoning responsibilities like paying bills or fulfilling commitments - I'm just advocating for people to devote more time to PLAY and less time to working hard because they think they NEED to do that in order to deserve doing fun and frivolous things. I've also never married or had any desire to have children. I remember my aunts, mom, relatives saying "You'll change your mind when you get older." Well, I'm older and realize that was the best decision of my life, other than quitting smoking.
I'm 79, married, self-employed writer, one adult autistic son, with my own list of "I don't have time for this nonsense." As a writer, I do need a LOT of alone time, outside as well as inside, but...happily married to someone. Just not joined at the hip 24/7. My list starts with clothes: no more skirts, no more high heels. Men's jeans because pockets, better material & last longer, not skin-tight or "fashionable." Men's or unisex T-shirts and turtlenecks (in winter.) Dress-up is "nice" slacks, nicer top, comfortable shoes. Flannel sheets year 'round because they feel good to me. Sleep patterns have also changed, and now include a near-obligatory afternoon nap, later bedtime, getting up just before dawn. I do wake up at 3 am, but only briefly. Books: we have bookshelves on every possible wall of every room. I am not "culling" the shelves heavily: I re-read books I like and discard books I don't like w/in the first week. As a writer living in a very small town with very limited library, I need my own research library and it's all around me, including an earlier edition of the OED. I like the music I like and ignore the music I don't...all my records, tapes, CDs are music I like. I still have enough china and flatware to entertain 20 easily---and use whichever (formal, informal) I feel like at the moment. Am using surviving bits and pieces of my great-grandmother's for dessert plates because why not? Our son has no interest in most of these things and will inherit the stuff he wants. If something breaks I don't worry or grieve (OK, the big cut-crystal pitcher...that might provoke a tear, because it's so gorgeous when the sun hits it, but I've already survived the broken dinner bell, two goblets, and a bowl. Friends are more important than inherited pretties. My interests also don't fit the social norm...I still have horses (don't ride as much, due to multiple concussions with consequences) and play with swords. That's getting harder, but I'm still doing stabby and swinging (sabre) things. Puncturing or slicing water bottles hung from tree limbs--FUN.
Moved from US to Ireland and recently to Hungary. Introvert. Faith-filled. Just turned 59+1 😂 Very content and grateful. Would be grand to have a mugga tay with any of ye! We are all walking on the same path, separately. God bless ye!
I’m 64 and, as soon as I retire, my wardrobe will be jeans and t-shirts except for funerals or weddings, and I don’t plan on wearing dresses. I don’t have investments, so nothing to compare there. I don’t decorate for Christmas at all- red and green make me anxious (a real thing). I love pineapple on pizza! My personal non-conformity is that I refuse to shave anymore. I don’t care and I don’t wear shorts or dresses or sleeveless tops, so there is no need to waste my time.
I'm 63, self-employed, never married and with you on about half of these norms. I've always done my own thing - the people who know me don't care and the people who care don't know me. As I get older, I find the biggest change is that I don't try to hide it anymore. When I was younger and my parents were alive, and I worked in an office, I tried harder to fit in but now I can do what I want, when I want, how I want. I suppose some would call it "living an authentic like and being true to yourself."
I'm a 68 yr old woman who lives alone in the middle of nowhere with 2 cats and a horse. I've been here for 18 years. I used to have a herd of horses but now I just have one. I used to spend time with "friends" but I really don't do that anymore. My 'friends" invite me to lunch, but I no longer accept their invitations. I no longer have time for anyone but myself.
One social norm I don't follow is wearing your shoes in the house. No one (not even guests) are allowed to wear shoes in my house. I think it's fantastically disgusting to drag the world's dirt, feces, germs, vomit, etc into my home. Perhaps this started because I've worked at a hospital my entire adult life and I see all of the nasty crap that hospital workers walk in. Or maybe it's because I grew up in a house that was very unkempt with carpets and rugs that were always stained and smelly. P.S. Although I am married, for 24 years now, if I were to ever find myself divorced or widowed, I have zero desire to be in another relationship and until I found your channel, I always thought I was weird for feeling that way. I love my alone time and my own nest!
am the opposite in that, living in the country side...soil ect is good for the home, earth is special. though i do work hard on getting rid of the old stuff...lol
I don’t know when wearing shoes in the house became a norm-I could understand it if you lived in a 15th century castle but in my house-leave the shoes at the door because that sharp little pebble wedged in the tread of your Nike is gonna eff up my hardwood floor!
I sometimes think my husband and I should live in separate wings with a shared central space. He's a borderline hoarder, I like empty space, air, and light. He's a night owl, I'm a lark. He likes having his feet uncovered at night, I can't sleep if my feet are cold. And so on.
I refuse to paint my nails and toenails, dye my hair, and wear makeup, high heels, or what is stylish. I don't decorate for Christmas (just don't love it). I have "weird" interests, and have no interest in what most others talk about. I have no top sheet, fancy linens, or guest things, either. I don't sleep with my husband anymore (pre-menopause, snoring, flopping over, and temp. differences made sleep impossible). I love to go camping and to restaurants alone. I eat mostly meat. I'm just an odd and independent soul.
Not odd, wonderfully self aware. I couldn’t give a rats arse what others think of me, break the rules, so what? Who’s gonna lock you up? Have a great life ❤🇬🇧🇬🇧
Amen, sister. I hate wearing makeup and nail polish. I love cotton, linen, natural things power to plastic materials like polyester, etc. Let us feel comfortable.
I don't dye my hair. It used to cost me between $350-400 to have it done every 8 weeks. Then my hairdresser wasn't at the salon anymore, so I stopped going altogether because I simply couldn't be bothered 😂 that was 3 years ago and I love my natural golden brown hair
I have no time for insensitive, selfish, mouthy, rude people. A strong woman/man doesn't need to be nasty or loud to get their point across. Be kind. People are so lacking in good manners these days.
I’m neutral with many. I’m not rude, but I’m not “kind” either. No one gets to automatically demand kindness from me. I’m kind to myself by providing civil, unattached politeness to most, since most people at best hold no interest to me.
I love my single life. I'm 81, vibrant and healthy. I'm too fat, but I love my ice cream. I dieted since I turned 15. I don't know what happened, but I gained 14 lbs. I was not aware of eating more and we did not have treats. We had 3 hots and a cot. (LOL) Once I hit 80 I wrote a book and bought Blue Bell ice cream. I am like Garfield....round is a shape. I'm not overweight, I'm just under tall. Love your show.
In 2019 I got baptized, told my bf our relationship had to change and when he realized that meant no sex, he was gone. Best decision I made! I go to movies, beach, travel, restaurants, and more myself. I do not want to marry again so I don't see point of dating. I get the rolled eyes look when I say I wanna do things God's way. Some assume you don't have a full life without a partner, but it feels like freedom to me. Do what I want when and how I want. Sometimes lonely but most often not.
Out daughter finally divorced her abusive husband and is constantly being asked who she is dating . After her divorce she did date for awhile but found out that the world of “ dating” was full of more controlling men, a couple of sociopathic dates and men who wanted to rush into a relationship way too early so she stopped dating and tells ppl if GOD sends the right man into her life she will think about it… but she was so damaged by her ex She is happy to live with her dog , works hard to support herself and loves the freedom to do what she wants when she wants , ……
You're already married by Biblical spiritual standards. You didn't grow a new hymen. That is false doctrine. The government is not how God defines marriage.
@spilledit. She wasn't married. She had a boyfriend, not a husband. So they weren't married. And she says since he left, she didn't see the point of getting married anymore.
The social norms and trends trends of seniors that I avoid: 1. Partnerships/dating/marriage 2. New vehicles 3. Owning a home 4. Hanging out/friendships with only females 5. Gossiping 6. Striving for superiority 7. Religion 8. Formal volunteerism 9. Travel and seeking adventure 10. “Badass” female mentality 11. Physical intimacy 12. Striving to fit into groups 13. Labeling people 14. Minimalism 15. Fashion trends 16. Wastefulness 17. Gambling
AMEN! PREACH! I am not pathetic! I LOVE my solitude. I just found your channel, wish I found it sooner. Oh, and just because I'm a single woman not looking for a mate does not mean I like girls!
The best thing about passing 60 is that your "give a schitte" completely breaks. because you learn that most of it never really mattered. So if it does not improve your view of the sunset, then it does not belong in your life. Cheers from Lake Mohawk, NJ!
I’ve decided recently that I’m no longer buying into the norm that my aging face needs “repair” or “correction” beauty products. Aging is normal.. and while I will still maintain skin health with sunscreen and a good diet, I’m no longer buying into the belief that any wrinkle I form needs a “drop of youth serum” so some company can make a buck off my insecurities…. I’m sick-of-it!!! That marketing has women acting so hard on themselves and to each other.
Separate housing is the best idea. You never have to be in servitude. Cleaning up someone's messes, doing their laundry, Cleaning The house while they sit on the couch then act surprised or angrey because you ask them to help! You won't end up paying their bills because conveniently they lost Or quit their jobs as soon as they moved in with you!
Agreed. In this social climate, the benefits of living alone outweigh those of living with a partner. It's far more equitable an arrangement if you don't have children. Sometimes, even if you do.
Oh my goodness, your video is so refreshing. I'm 55, live in my own little garden cottage by the ocean and I wouldn't change a thing. I work part-time and I'm childfree. My husband and I are living in separate homes but we're still good friends. My roomies are a dog and two birds and it's great! Shoutout to pineapple pizza. My favorite.
Social norm I gave up long ago: caring what people think about how i look and dress. I shaved my long hair because I was tired of coloring it, let it grow back grey and it was soooo liberating. Next, I dress for comfort, not to “look nice”. Don’t get me wrong, I dress appropriately but forget about what is in style and I don’t care if the clothes are faded. Also, no makeup, it’s a waste of time and money.
I am older than you, was married for 48 years and have been single since my husband’s death. Despite those differences, I think very much the same as you on the majority of the subjects you mentioned. It’s refreshing to know there are other independent-thinking women out there.😊
Love this! As a 59 year old single, this resonates. My Xmas tree is up in November too and I keep it up until Ukrainian Xmas. I buy presents for myself and stocking stuffers too. I wear what I like and have numerous outfits on repeat. Any relationship with a partner involves him having his own home as well. A good time involves playing the piano, reading or working a jigsaw puzzle. My animals are my family and I am content!
Eastern Rite Catholic? I grew up along side Ukrainian Catholics in the Wyoming Valley of NE.PA. really Kool that your priests could be Married and have kids .
I'm 67, been living on my own since I was 31. I sleep in the livingroom (bed and all), do not entertain, cook and bake the way I enjoy, lock the gates and go to bed at sundown, and wake at first light. Whether I choose to get up then, depends. I unplugged my TV probably 8 years ago, don't miss it. I recently have acquired a number of yard mowing and cleanup jobs, which give me a sense of accomplishment, some necessary cash, and exercise. I don't buy into the role of subservient, gullible twit, which I had in younger years. I like being alone (with my small dog). If I want to be around people, I do. My one regret is for years wasted trying to live up to expectations of others, college degree abandoned. I am content, however, now.
I'm 56. My social norm breaks: Purple hair. Comfy clothes ONLY. Even my "dressy" stuff is cozy. Fun clothes! (That are comfy). Hand-crocheted, fun colors and patterns. "Stimming" as much as I please - moving my fingers, swaying, tapping my feet, fidgeting... no care what you may think. Funky home decorating. It's cluttered, I don't keep it "showroom", and I'm surrounded with things and colors I love! And the most important thing that I had to learn to do - I speak my mind freely. I'm kind, try to be tactful, but I no longer hide my feelings. (Opinions, I'm more discerning about sharing.)
- Autumn is my favorite season, so I don’t put up my Christmas decorations until the day after Thanksgiving (or later)…and then when winter gets dreary, the little lights stay cozy, so I keep the Christmas decorations up until March! 🎄 - I go to sleep at 3am and wake around everyone else’s lunchtime. - Sleep with the bedroom at 65 degrees fahrenheit - If I find a good shirt, I get it in every color and wear it (them) almost exclusively for the next decade. - I keep pretty much only two pairs of shoes: summer sandals and closed winter walking shoes, plus a pair of slippers. These were rather expensive but will also last a decade with good care and replacing the insoles every 6 months. (I have held onto a few odd pair of other shoes for extraneous circumstances, like a pair of heels for a wedding, a pair of winter boots). - I wear earplugs in loud restaurants (can hear conversation better over the noise) - If the mood strikes and the company is good, I have been known to order two desserts
Embracing my hermit. I am quite a bit older than you, but at 60 I decided that I would embrace my solitude and stay home alone. I am done dealing with rude and obnoxious people.
I’m in my 60s, recently diagnosed as autistic. I’ve been masking for so long, that I’m exhausted. I now no longer have the desire or energy to mask any more. I prefer to be alone, and I have a “uniform” that I wear (stretch pants, t-shirts, Crocs or tennis shoes). I like extending the Christmas decor because it’s some work to get the decorations up and down, plus I enjoy those decorations. I don’t like having guests at my home any more because then I can’t escape when I get overloaded. But NO, NO! TOILET PAPER MUST COME OVER THE TOP! 🤣🤣🤣
Yes, lots of what she said reminds me of myself, and I am a late diagnosed highly masking autistic woman as well. The doctor who evaluated me recommended I find other autistic people to form community with because I find being around the normies to be tiring.
@@karenholmes6565 , there are some good RUclipsrs you might check out. The comments alone are worth their weight in gold. So many things I can relate to. Paul and “Autism From the Inside” is good. So is Mom on the Spectrum-I think her early works after she got diagnosed in her thirties were good, especially ones about the characteristics of autistic women. Many female autistics are underdiagnosed because we are capable of masking so well. You know this! 😊 Have you learned how to hide your stimming?😄 Instead of wiggling my feet (for which I got yelled at because it was distracting to the neurotypicals), I now scrunch my toes in my shoes. ONO Rollers and track balls help. There is a TEDtalk by an autistic researcher, and she wears a t-shirt with “Autistic” spelled out starting with the anarchist “A” in-a-circle. I got one of those shirts, lol! My diagnosis has explained SO many things in my life. And it’s not a disorder or a disability-it’s a difference.
Similar! But I plead an exemption on the TP roll: in my apartment’s small bathroom, the TP roll hangs from the vanity exactly at my right elbow. It must hang from the back because otherwise, my right elbow unrolls it to the floor.
Oh my gosh! I'm SO grateful I found you. I feel exactly the same way. I really LOVE living alone, am not looking for a significant other, etc. It's SO nice to hear another mature woman saying the same.
Your first one is so so so so SO important to me. I am single by choice (mid 30s), but I've currently been sharing a house with someone for 6 years, and in a past relationship, and it is SO draining. I need my space to function FOR ME and to work for my mental health. HOMEostasis.The few times I've had my own space for myself makes life SO much easier and less stressful for me. I've reiterated to potential partners that I will only ever have my own space from now on and that they will have theirs. Period. It is so hard trying to explain this and be understood. THANK YOU for putting this one out there and making a girl feel heard.
Ill have bacon and eggs for supper. I greet everyone who catches my eye, especially dogs. I wear bright colours, I mean loud colours. I dont use a cell phone however I do use a tablet. I wear a hat. 😂😂
I enjoy breakfast for dinner more than breakfast. I can’t eat much in the morning and hate the smell of breakfast food cooking in the morning. I have no problem with it later in the day.
It's so great seeing more women openly talking about being single and loving it. I carried so much shame for a long time both for being queer and for not being super interested in dating and relationships. I still wasted a lot of time trying to meet all sorts of societal expectations. There was a ton of pressure on me to date men, so I did and I regret all the wasted time and the trauma that came from some of those experiences. Middle age has been so freeing. I am very protective of my time outside of work and have gotten better at setting boundaries.
I am so happy I found your channel! I am 55, single and childless by choice. I have recently decided to stop caring about what people think or expect from me. It is exhausting. I've started doing what makes me happy and I have learned to say NO whenever I feel like it. Thanks for your videos!
I am so glad to have your vlog pop on my feed! I love your channel name and your 'take no prisoners' attitude. I am widowed since 2019. I was 60, my hubby was 61 and I found him on the floor dead on December 22. I'll never forget because I was going to my last day of work for the year. We buried him on Christmas Eve, which may sound strange but worked well. We are family farmers and about 20 years ago my hubby started setting up a 'Farmer's Christmas Party' at a local restaurant for all the area farmers. He figured businesses have holiday parties and farmers should, too. It was all planned out. So that was our funeral luncheon. The restaurant picked up the tab for the family, which was very nice. My youngest sister is always asking when I am going to sell my home. Do I need a 4 bedroom home? No, it's just me and my dogs. Two of the bedrooms are closed off. One is my "yarn vault". But my home is paid for and all I pay is property taxes and utilities. So about $700 a month. Where else would I live for that? And I'm still on the farm, but have family close by. My daughter lives about 2 miles south of me, my nephew lives 2 houses north, and my youngest son lives about a mile north. We never had good china. When we built our home, my mum told me I'd regret not having a dining room. I don't. Not at all. Why would I want a room that was only used occasionally? When my mum passed away, my sisters kept asking if I wanted a china set. That's not how I entertain. When we have friends over, we use our very best Dixie plates. I wear what I like, what makes me feel good. Usually jeans, tshirts, and tennis shoes. Not those big bulky tennis shoes, but the flimsy beach kind. Or sandals. Or boots. No heels. Moccassins are good, too. As for clothes, I make or buy a few pieces every year, but I have sweatshirts from when my kids were in high school. That was over 10 years ago. I'm still employed and enjoy what I do. I work at a university maintaining the database and managing our student employees. I love it. In my off time, I knit, write, draw, and learn new skills. My older son is getting married in September, so I'm teaching my grandsons how to dance. Just basics like the YMCA, Electric Slide, Cupid Shuffle, etc. We tackle one a week, so we have a few dances ready. And they get to help me with jobs around the house. At 10, 8, and 7, they love it.
I am sixty now, and have stopped trying to fit in about 20 years ago. It gets easier and easier. I live alone too. When I get home from my job at a school, I sigh with relief. I love being alone.
I'm with you on the clothes! I wear soft comfortable clothes every single day. When I find a shirt or pants that feel great, I buy several and keep them for years. I've even created a uniform to wear at home and a uniform to wear at work. It just removes a lot of anxiety to have something soft and familiar on my body at all times.
Your video reminds me of the old saying ... When you’re 20 you care what everyone thinks, when you’re 40 you stop caring what everyone thinks, when you’re 60 you realize no one was ever thinking about you in the first place.
Heard that one before - still true!
well they certainly are not thinking about me NOW......
I LOVE this!
OMG,love this!
So so right
I am a man who crochets. I've crocheted in public. If my wife is at a Drs appt, I might be sitting in the waiting area working on a crochet project. During a long bus ride, I crochet. I get looks. I couldn't care less. - The light in our living room comes mostly from large, clear Christmas lights that we leave up 365 days a year - I paint rather poorly and display my work with great pride - my wife makes more money than I do and I'm not ashamed, I'm quite proud of her accomplishments - I, too, like to wear the same thing all the time. - Ketchup is for meat and eggs, I like ketchup on steak, even really good steak. This upsets some cooks, but I reckon they get over it eventually. It's not my problem. - I never had a career, just a long series of widely varied jobs. I've never found anything that I would like to do for the rest of my life, so I switch industries when I feel like it. I've been a body guard, factory worker, bus driver, accountant, customer service rep, writer, carpenter, to name a few. Now I'm 54 and learning to be a truck driver. I want to experience all the things I can. - Here's to breaking the molds! Edit: I've gotten so much kick back for changing jobs, so I'm gonna explain - not to defend me - but to educate you: I have been working since I was 8 years old. My first job was in a factory and by the time I was 14, I was making $3.25 an hour. I had no opportunity for college. During my teen and young adult years, I had to take whatever job would hire me - I had no choices. In my mid twenties I became a single dad so I continued to take whatever job paid the best. I wasn't attached to any of the jobs, so I changed whenever I found something that I was qualified for that also paid a little bit more. Money has always been a motivating factor for me - a job paying $20 an hour is much more interesting to me than a job paying $7.50. If I had stayed a factory worker for life, it would never have turned into a six figure income. Same for a bus driver, carpenter, etc. Sticking with any one of my past jobs would never have made me successful in the way that our culture thinks I should be - and each of my job changes has resulted in better income for me. Right now I'm a local truck driver and it's the best money I have ever made - however it is seasonal and the company's top end pay is $30 an hour - so if I find something that interests me that pays $35, you better believe that I'll be changing jobs again. My wife didn't marry me for money, she knew I'd work and that I often have more than one job at a time. She knew that my credit score was above 750, that I have no debt, and my bills are paid. She married me because I'm an honest, compassionate, loving man who treats her with the utmost respect. (I just gotta say that I love that my comment has brought this much activity to Silver and Solo's channel. I really appreciate her and I know the activity will benefit her - this is awesome!)
It’s funny how if a man says “I’m an artist who works in fiber arts”, then this is accepted. But-if a man says “I crochet as a hobby” that that’s somehow weird or wrong. I say we should normalize both genders doing whatever they love! (Like women in woodworking, etc.) More power to you! 🧶
Good for you the most important thing in life is to be true to one’s self everything thing else is just outside noise
I taught both my sons to cook, bake, crochet and knit :) they can also darn socks :)
Both are grown men - very resourceful, critical thinking
good for you!
God bless you Sir, for not only doing everything that makes you happy… But for watching videos like hers! You go dude.
I've found that being a happily single woman after 50 really seems to irritate other people. After years of being everyone's caretaker, it's finally MY TURN to take care of myself! Why is that so hard for some people to understand??
Yes, irritated is the word 😅
@@girlienerd I too have found that it seems to upset many people that I am content with being alone and living a simple quiet life. I cannot understand why it should be so.
Yes I think it irritates people because your doing good on your own and they secretly envy your freedom ❤
@@paulawarwick1854this! Def they envy others freedom
Take care, time is of the essence and your memories moving forward are to be about your life fulfilled!!
What you see is what you get. I don't even wear a bra anymore. At 83 I don't give a rat's ass what other people think. Comfort is the prime driver. Good food, soft easy to wash clothes and good shoes. Warm fleecy things a size bigger than the norm and baggy sweats. Wake up at 3 bedtime at 7 or 8. Sleep with my cat. Eat a whole box of popsicles if I feel like it. Life is short. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Meaningless social encounters and parties bore me to death. I don't even have jewelry or party clothes.
I love your attitude! Good for you.😊
Me at 33. Love to see this for me in 50 years
I love it! 👏👏👏❤❤❤
I'm 50 and agree with you 100%
I wonder about your comment on "meaningless social encounters" and what it means....do you stay away from people more now or do you try to make ALL your encounters mean something?
I ask because I feel I have more and more as I age gravitated towards making ALL encounters meaningful and by that I don't mean I divulge my life in detail to everyone I encounter but that I try or maybe try isn't even the right word but rather it's been more NATURAL feeling to make "mini" meaningful connections with most people these days......I like it and find it enriching🙂
I'm 61 and completely relate to this!
I have been with my partner for 14 years, we don't live together and each have our own homes, we will never marry, have not mixed finances and have every intention of staying together until one of us passes. We date, go on holidays together and our families treat us as a couple. Most people think we're odd but it works for us.
I agree I tell mine every day I'm leaving but just to my own house I can't be under his roof any more
This makes me happy! ❤😊
We don’t have our own homes, but we do sleep in separate rooms and keep our finances separate. It’s rather peaceful this way!
Sounds like HEAVEN
My married parents lived in separate rooms, hadn't seen each other for three weeks until they met in M & S😁
I’m 70, a single woman all my life, and happily so. I’m always annoyed by the people who insist that I’m not “complete” without a man. If you are not whole in yourself, no one else is going to be able to complete you, and you will lose yourself trying to complete them.
A relationship never works for long when one person needs the other person to be "whole". I was married ( babysat) 26 years for a woman that refused to take on any attempt to grow up.
In the 70s feminists had a saying I remember: A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.
@@thomcarr7021at our age, we’d end up as a caregiver. Who are these people thinking we need a man?
🇨🇦 …I kinda think you’re my new hero 😂
@@mooshygirl 😊 I do want to say, I have nothing against marriage, but it needs to be a balanced relationship. The union of two wholes can absolutely be greater than the sum of its parts, but never compromise your own wholeness.
I think I’ve found my people-and quite frankly, I’m shocked. Reading some of these comments is INCREDIBLY validating, because I see myself! Up at 4am, in bed by 7. Not married. No kids. Shaved my head over 5 years ago, and will never grow my hair out again. I don’t date. I have few friends. I spend my time crocheting, going to the YMCA to swim, and pursuing whatever I find interesting. Yes, it’s a bit lonely now and then, but I consider that a fair trade off for the freedom I receive in return. I no longer have to live up to anyone else’s expectations of me-and I’m just finding peace in being financially stable and independent. Thank you so much for this vid and channel!
Yes!
What you describe is my worst nightmare. Sure, I could be alone forever, but I deserve a family. I have more to offer and more to gain. I can be alone when I'm dead. I'm not gonna cop out and say, "At least I have my freedom!" That's what a 19 year old says to cope with living in the dorms.
Isn't it a bit of work to shave your head to keep it shaved? I'm curious. Probably takes less time than keeping up with a man bun? Because that's the only alternative I see for men that don't cut their hair at all. Low maintenance to the max.
@@bitrudder3792 I was very self-conscious when I started putting my hair up. I don't like the look, but there's no damn way I'm gonna keep my head, face, or pubes trimmed up on a regular basis. It just doesn't matter.
@bitrudder3792 how do you know the comment was from a man? I've been thinking about shaving my head, I'm a 40 something woman
As a 28 yr old, this video was very affirming for me! I am single, not lonely, and not looking. One social norm I buck, and care less and less about each day, is I will regularly sit outside in my car to eat lunch at work. I call it my introvert intermission. I cannot possibly talk work with people all day and then also small talk over lunch… nope, I go outside and have some brief solitude in the middle of my day.
I have always either came home or had lunch in my car! (I’m 65)
Also single by choice- can’t tolerate people in my home. Love to socialize though, and come home to peace!
That’s such a nice break. I worked for 29 years and took my breaks in the break room with coworkers and many interruptions. It was in a hospital so no peace from the noises nearby. Yet I did that for 29 years. Most often I wasn’t refreshed after a break. You are very smart to take “alone” time for your lunch. Luckily I’m retired now and my life is pretty peaceful so I’m making up for it.
I like your duvet use but tell me, have you found an easy way to put it back on after the wash.
I’m going to borrow your “Introvert Intermission” - I so need & do this too - what a fantastic name for it! My job is in customer service by phone & I truly enjoy it (100% because of the company I am so, so blessed to work with/for) but after talking all day, the last thing I want to do is call someone & talk on the phone - even with family. I didn’t include this in my main comment, but I get up way earlier on purpose to have at least 2-3 hours alone, in the dark, before my day really starts. Yes as an over 60 yr old I do fall asleep 🤣 but my introvert nature needs this!
i am kinda the same but its not talking about work i dislike its talking to idiots or average people with nothing in common with me. but since your 28 be careful about what a 60 year old lady says she seems like the normal case of a cat lady that hit the wall and learned to live with her choices. she seems to be doing fine but most don't. i am assuming your a woman though, if your a man you do not need to worry about anything i just said.
After 65 you become invisible to everyone, so live for yourself and embrace a peaceful heart and mind.
I am 64 and Ive never felt invisible
I'm 66 and newly retired and am gathering my 'retirement wardrobe ' and arranging family visits and further education. Loving it!
@@ThePossumone They are saying you will become invisible next year. User your powers wisely!
@@bleepbloop101010101 lol - 6 months of power !! I hear this being invisible as you age - but invisible to who though? maybe 18 year old men - although my 18 year old grandson loves me and I see him and he sees me. Invisible to who? Our friends, our family, our neighbours? The woman at the grocery store, the person you work with - are you invisible to them? I think it will be good when that saying is phased out - as life is enjoyable and a blessing at many ages !!
I've been invisible all my life
I am ignoring how I should act and what I should like as a Black woman. I have never fit the stereotype and this has always annoyed people in the Black (AND Brown) community. I also don't feel ashamed for being a divorcee.
Good for you! I just hate how society tries to put everyone in a box based off their skin color too. They expect you to think and act or vote a certain way and if you don’t they resort to name calling. I think the powers at be are just wanting us to fight and not get along or control us. God forbid you think for yourself. I’m a divorced woman and even caught flack from my own family and friends asking me why I don’t find another partner so I don’t end up alone. They just don’t get some people are happy being single.
I don’t fit either. Honestly, you have to make yourself happy. Feel good about yourself! Life is short!
hi.. fellow black woman here..no kids, no husband, financially thriving, happy and healthy at 65..loving my life and no regrets
Oh no you didn't!
We are people, not stereotypes!
I love your lifestyle. I am 65 and I no longer accept the norm any longer! Had a doctor appointment today (new patient consultation), and my appointment time was 2:30. After waiting 1 hour, I left. No one came in the exam room to check on me, explain the delay or even see if I was doing OK. So, at 3:35, I opened the exam room and left. I gave no explanation, just walked out! My time is valuable to me.
Same thing happ To me last week. After trying for 2 days to see go, surgery rang and said dr will squeeze you in . I was there in 10 mins. After waiting for one and half hours, I went to reception, and told them how rude the dr was, and left!
Went to a private surgery near me and had my ear problem sorted in 15 mins! It cost me £65, but money well spent. Like you, my time is too precious to be messed around!
Greetings from UK❤️🇬🇧
This. I'm 45 now and have done that very same thing a few times over the last decade as well. I love virtual visits now even tho I find technology incredibly frustrating.. But at least I'm at home whilst waiting.
My husband taught his doctor how to not make him wait the first time he became his patient: he left too & he’s never kept him waiting since. I on the other hand have more patience as I have worked in medical care & know that there are truly authentic / legit causes to offices running late essentially daily but I think the issue is that there is often an imbalance of respect for patients’ time & actual financial penalties imposed for lateness & more (🇨🇦). If we were permitted to impose our own financial penalties & actually by law be paid, wouldn’t it be interesting how short the wait could be in many industries (when it’s caused by frivolous reasons)?!? I think you gave way more wait time than they deserved & applaud you!
Whenever I go to an appointment, to a restaurant to meet someone, etc., I bring a book. While waiting, I read.
Sometimes the book turns out to be so good that I want to be called late or for the person to show up late.
I did that once, they took me to the exam room and after about an hour, I got up and left . They did call me later that afternoon and I explained to them, that I waited for over an hour, no one came, so I left, and told them they would be getting a bill from me for wasting my time, to get there, and back home and my time waiting...😂
I was shattered when my husband died, absolutely devastated. I still miss him, but I absolutely love my life. I moved to a coastal area, ditched all my old furniture and decorated this home exactly as I wanted to. The last 6 years is the first time in my life I've ever lived alone, I lived with my parents, I had a couple of flatmates, and I got married. The freedom I have to either cook a meal, have Vegemite on toast or order takeaway is amazing. If I want to go to bed at 2am I will, if I want to go to bed at 9pm I will. Truly I love my life.
I miss that freedom.
Sounds like my life. I have been married to my best friend for 48 years. We live like this and get along well.
@@joycej9415 yes, I absolutely understand. My husband and I were like that. It's why I still miss him. I used to work in live television I used to be gone 3 nights every month. ,and he was the kids caregiver. He made sure everything was done just as I would have done it. The only differences we ever had were meals, I liked to eat early he liked to eat late, but he was the cook so I went along with it 😅. But even though our marriage was mutual respect and mutual love. One still has to be considerate to the other person. Nowadays I have no one to consider in any way whatsoever. As I say, I still miss him, but the absolute freedom I have now really is insanely wonderful.
@pixie3760 oh yes, I can see what you mean too!
My husband of 40 yrs passed away last fall. For first time in my life I am alone. And I am enjoying it. My grown daughter who is high on the spectrum lives with me, but she goes to work and then hides in her room. I wear the same few things all the time. I eat what I want, when I want. I am retiring this summer at 62 and will travel as I feel like. If I want to stay up all night, I will. I nap most afternoons. By product of working night shift for 30 years. I don't wear make up. I don't waste money on fancy nails, shoes or clothes. I enjoy my own company and am happy to be alone most of the time.
Yes !! Same here !! I love my life now !! 💗💗💗
🤗 except that I'm the daughter in this scenario we are kindred spirits. Call me at 2 or 3am but never at 8am unless it's an emergency.
I do the same thing. I go to work and hide in my room when I come home. I want to be alone. I enjoy being alone.
You two are like sisters from other mothers, LOL.
I do all these thing but I am happily married for 37 years.
Single BW in my fifties whose lived my entire life in various phases of conformity and now complete non-conformity. I don't go to church (gasp, horror, as a BW pearls will be clutched on this one), but I believe in a higher power. I'm an introvert and a loner so I eschew any notion of having large social gatherings over my house. Every room in my house is mine, lol, no designated guest rooms anymore. I am currently planning to spend holidays away from family and friends in my hometown and spending time away from the hustle and bustle of the holidays with a different set of friends at a vacation destination. No decorations, no holiday meal prep, just relaxing with friends on the beach, resting and reading. No wrapping paper, or shopping for gifts. I work just enough to live and spend my time off peacefully getting as much rest time as possible. I wear the same comfortable clothes over and over again. Wash, rinse, repeat. I order groceries for pick up, food on delivery if I don't feel like shopping or cooking. Basically I look at all the busy BW around me and I do the exact opposite and I don't cave to others norms and expectations. I live in peace ☮️.
What's BW ?
What’s a BW please ?
Sorry. Big Woman, my friend said.
BW = Black Woman. The expectation that they attend church and open their homes to large family gatherings that involve much food buying, preparation (with old family recipes that everyone loves) and mounds of clean up and holiday activity. This lady is opting out of the hullabaloo for a Peaceful holiday with others. Perhaps she is an introvert and is eschewing the whole Holiday madness theme. Christmas should be Peaceful. I myself have tried to discourage the whole gift-giving thing (not because I am a stingy Grinch) but because I am the youngest in my family on one side, 58, just like Jan aka Silver&Solo. We don’t need another blessed thing in my townhouse! My parents don’t need anything. Neither does my aunt and uncle. But I get outvoted every year for the gift exchange. I’ve finally found out people’s favorite restaurants and simply given gift certs. Everyone still likes to eat ! 🙅🏼♀️
You’re my hero. I’m comfortable with myself . I’m married, but astonishingly, he’s the same. He’s comfortable with himself. We give each other enormous room. Don’t bother with holidays. Just peaceful. ❤❤❤
I’m 59 and I don’t want to attend family functions anymore even funerals. Only my child or husband that’s it. Tired of doing things for others to make them happy. Stopped setting myself on fire to keep others warm.
I absolutely love that expression, I'm going to borrow it!
❤
I agree: I LOVE this! I’m stealing it, too. I will kindly suggest to other women to stop the fires! ❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜‼️
@@marygoldstiver2637 Me, too!
52, single, never married, no children and I LOVE my dog! I moved 18 hours away from family and friends to a state in which I’d never visited and I do not know a single soul…been here 6 years. It’s the best thing I’ve done for myself in a very long time.
I’m happy for you. I bet it’s a great feeling 😊
@@TarasSimpleCrochet not being tugged in every direction, not feeling like I have to run to everyone’s events, I am no longer the go to person for EVERYONE and EVERYTHING. I feel free.
@@b.l.wilson9724 Exactly and if you’re an introvert it’s even worse. Now you don’t have to come up with excuses to be alone if you choose to :)
@@TarasSimpleCrochet absolutely! ❤️
Ohhhh, I’ve been researching moving out of state far, far away myself. I read your comment and my heart skipped a beat. Lots to do to get the ball rolling, but I think I’m motivated. Glad you found a place that you’re happy with. All the best!!
At 30 I decided I no longer have to go to the movies to watch a movie I don't want to. At 40, I gave myself permission to no longer play "party games" at baby showers or wedding showers. I no longer wear dress shoes, I only wear Sketchers because they are comfortable. I own 4 pairs of them. I buy durable clothing and only wear white or black socks. I've had pretty much the same hairdo for 25 years. I stopped wearing make-up around 4 years ago. That's me.
I quit going to movie theaters when I was I found out one of our local theaters was infested with bed bugs! No thanks. I’ll stay home and pop my own popcorn and watch movies instead. There’s not really anything worth going to see anymore anyway with the garbage they put out.
I've worn only black Hanes socks since 21. Before that, I did black and white. But white is too much work. One brand, one style, one color.
@@jaustill237 - I do the black sock thing also! For a long time it was about the black sneakers I wore with my scrubs, which often had black pants. then the black legging era. But I don't wear socks very much anymore now that I'm not going into clinical situations anymore (because I don't wear face diapers either). So it's sandals, and bare feet, and occasionally flats that I take off as soon as reasonably possible. Oh, and some ugly crocs because I can hose the mud off of them from the garden. Or painted them without worrying about paint getting on them.
@@pj123xyz - you are so right about the quality of the movies. I just sit and pick them apart for predictive programming these days. But sometimes I like to go by myself to the theater and sit in the first or second row and stare straight up at the giant screen. This doesn't happen often, but it is definitely something that I do by myself because other people won't do it.
movies at home… I don't even watch movies so much anymore, although these serial TV shows are kind of like movies. Pause buttons are awesome, so my joints don't get too stiff from sitting too long in one place! And I don't miss anything for a bathroom break. And the snacks are way better and a lot cheaper! What's not to love about movie night at home???!!!!
YES to the skip the shower games! I hate those and finally learned to say “no thanks” when they pass the paper and pencils. YES to Skechers! YES to black and white socks.
I am a 42 year old African woman, unmarried, celibate and childless. I sometimes feel guilty for being this happy. I need to breath out and let myself be. I loved the video where you told us to let go of trying to be at the top of the career ladder. I get paid well enough, i have invested my money and i keep healthy at the gym but could do better with my food intake. I love your channel. There is so much more to life than chasing after top jobs and placing not so great men on pedestals. At this moment i am travelling, drinking wine, drinking water and learning to use primer and concealer
THIS!!
I'm a 58 yo woman and I've been divorced since I was in my late twenties. My son is grown and I'm an introvert, so I enjoy my own company. I have popcorn for dinner if I want and I haven't decorated for Christmas in almost ten years. I live in a small southern town and am seen as an odd duck because I don't care to gossip with the neighbors.
Oh! Popcorn for dinner! I like that!
Popcorn and a cola are my supper many nights.
Ditto for Christmas! 😂😂
lol 😂 popcorn for dinner! I had an English rice pudding for my dinner last night and don’t care less!!! ❤
Decorating for Christmas is one of life's major stressors. I am proud of you.
I found myself alone after several traumas and tragedies. You are helping me accept this unsocial norm.
Wishing you the best. Trauma can ultimately strengthen. Hope you find your happy place, and what makes you - you. 🙂
Be patient with yourself, and for yourself.
Peace and (((hugs))).
In 2021, 32% of women in the US lived alone. Not uncommon! ❤
sending you a digital hug 🤗.
Most everyone here feel comfortable alone. We don't accept it. We accept the fact that we LIKE it. 😊
Awake at 3 in the morning allows one to marvel at the dark sacred night.
You're not the Lone Ranger I will do a crazy pattern like that for a month or two then switch over to something entirely different and just as crazy That's My life nowadays I'm in my late 70s I live alone and have been living alone and continue to want to live alone the rest of my life❤ I love it no one I have to worry about feeding no one I have to worry about taking care of no one I have to listen to no one I have to shop for no one I have to clean after❤ etcetera❤ now what's wrong with that ? 😂.. I'm not gliding From Misery.
I do what I want to when I want to call I want to and if I can afford it nobody here telling me what to do nobody here for me to do for no one here I have to try to please at my expense thank God❤ what's wrong with that ?😂
I love being awake at 3am....
I get more stuff done between 3 and 6 am than at any other time of day. No phone calls, no one bothers you. It is peaceful and I like watching the day dawn.....and I have the happiest birds ever in my neighborhood.
Ha ha ha, I’m a man, and I love living alone. I don’t decorate for Christmas almost at all anymore. What a relief!
I can so relate - the not decorating for X'mas bit ...
@@just-is123 feel this too. Done with all those man made traditions of chains . No xmas decorating EVER AGAIN .
I hate Christmas. It was great when I was a kid. How many more times am I going to go looking for the nostalgia that's gone? Zero.
@@paulkiefer5455 I always hated it, the faux bonhomie, horrible family gatherings, wasted paper and plastic junk that just goes to landfills later on, what a crock of BS.
My husband and I have always slept apart in our own rooms! I love the space and quiet. We are affectionate and make time for quality time together etc. No resentment about lost sleep, disturbed sleep. Our friends and family think it's weird, but I think they are just sleep deprived and irritable haha.
Also, these days I don't suffer fools anymore or subject myself to the company of people who don't treat me with love and respect. Even family. It has been hard but I realised I have to do this to protect my sanity from toxic family members. I'm 42 now and reaching mid life and perimenopause has helped me reevaluate my priorities in life.
Loved this video, thanks.
My husband and I have separate beds in the same room. He moves around a ton and I am a super light sleeper. If we had more room separate rooms would be great. My cousins and her husband have separate bedrooms and I am super envious of them!
@@faeriesmak Same here, we have always slept separately. When people find out they get so nosey and start asking intimate questions. I always say, "wow, why would you ask something like that?" That usually makes them stop. I don't see them again after that. I don't suffer fools now.
Same. Different bedrooms for years now. The snoring, farts, breathing in my face, unwanted attention, blue light from his gadgets were all too much.
I am 42 and have never been married. I enjoy living quietly, reading, watching whatever I want, eating, whatever I want, and not answering to anyone. I find most social rules, exhausting and don’t really have patience for them. I’ve been told all of my life. I am abnormal, it’s nice to finally find my people.
In the words of Morticia Addams, “what is normal to the spider is chaos to the fly”. Keep being awesome.
"Men and women weren't meant to live together, but live close and visit quite often." -- Catherine Hepburn (paraphrased.)
Yes!!! That's what I say
Great quote!
“Katharine Hepburn”
I’ve never seen this, sounds like a good idea!
It’s the only way I’d bother, I’m 54
Amen to that! Never want to clean-up after a man ever again. My ex-husband didn't have the same standards of cleanliness and organization. And even though he didn't expect me to clean up after him, I did anyway because I couldn't stand the mess. I'm so glad I have less estrogen now (presumably) and could not care less about having a man in my life.
Same here... I will never be a mans " maid" again !! You are preaching to the chior girl !! 💗💗💗
It's such a "get out of jail free" card! Best thing ever IMO.
all I can say is that personally I love HRT ( no history of estrogen linked cancer in my family ) and NOT for men. I an more cheerful, have more energy, easier to keep my weight down and my self styled orgasms are great! ; )
you are missing out on love and fun and intimacy! I'm 64 and my new husband is 41. and, what makes me want him and stay fit and fabulous is my HRT. low estrogen wrecked me. I've been on HRt for almost 15 years, and I look 20 years younger, and feel like I did before I had my kids at age 35. I always want a man in my life! a younger one *wink
I can soooo relate! I’m a 56-year old German who has had a long complicated transcontinental relationship that ended just when everything would have been okay to think of next steps financially and living-wise (yes, it was complicated), which unfortunately also coincided with the end of my child-bearing years. Needless to say that after 17 years of these complications, I did not really feel like hooking up with anyone initially. Then fate struck. I lost my brother (with whom I had bought a house as he was in a similar situation) and then both of my parents. I am now fixing up my parents’ house to move in while I am planning to sell the larger house I had bought with my brother and I am by now really happy and content with my life. Sure, I would have loved to have children, but just yesterday, I was thinking to myself, how very comfortable and happy I am with the ay things are; that I am really happy that I do not have any responsibilities outside of myself. Sure, it is somewhat sad that my pedigree ends with me and that I will not be able to pass on family lore and heirlooms, but seriously, who really cares? I, like you, need a lot of me-time and no longer WANT to work my way around and age-appropriate partner with baggage of his own. I love that if I don’t feel like it, I don’t have to cook and simply have leftovers or nothing at all. I love that I can work on art an crafts until late at night and don’t have to justify my whims to anyone. I love my life, which turned out very different from what I had planned as a young girl, but I don’t regret anything… Embrace what life throws your way…
When you were talking about wedding china and silver, oh and glassware, I thought I would share my latest pet peeve. Okay, all these young people getting married who, inside the invitation, enclose their list of wants. Usually I laugh, and ignore. Even if I don’t laugh, I ignore. Because honey, let me tell you this….you and your intended spouse have lived together for 4 yrs. You just moved into your custom built home. You drive very nice cars. You have the gall to ask me for 2 gifts. So in addition to the 8 cocktail glassware you want me to buy, you also expect me to pay for 1 night at your honeymoon retreat.
Oh, HELL NO!!
I need to stop at the Dollar Tree tomorrow and buy a card.
Because reasons.
@Songbirds3712...AMEN ! When couples started asking for "honeymoon experiences" I was done. If you have to ask invited guests to pay for your honeymoon it means YOU cant afford one.
I refuse to attend anymore weddings. The last bad experience did it for me. Freezing hall, horrendous inedible "food". lots of drunk guests, deafening loud music all through the wedding. Then I have to hand over a heafty some of cash for this mess to the bride and groom. No thank you. I'd rather stay home in peace.
I have been happily married for 18 years, have two wonderful teens, and a life built from scratch. One of my biggest regrets in life was creating a wedding registry, even at the time I felt ill thinking about the idea of making and sending the gift registry. My maid of honor, bless her, worked in the China department at BBB and her enthusiasm and rationalization for why we should tell people what to buy us was convincing, at the time. I wish I never made one.
@@stephaniet9264 Inedible food if you can ever get to it or get any of it.
Plus you get to feel like a real mark when you don’t even get a thank you note.
If it makes you happy and you're not hurting anyone, live your life exactly as you want.
I hate hot sunny weather so now I close my blinds in summer. I am so much happier and less stressed…and Also I avoid going outside during the day and you know the more you do what works for you, the more energetic and happy you feel!
Oh, gods, yes. I shutter up like I’m a cave dweller and don’t go outside during the day and I don’t give a shit. Halleluja.
75 this June, divorced 10 years this August after 35 years, living single, wake at 3ish and watch yt until I feel like rolling out of bed. Participate in various physical and art activities at the very active center. Put Snoopy Christmas shower curtain and other bathroom accessories up in July until whenever. Study languages, get lost in reading suspense books; attend art school out of state in the summer, cello and now guitar, volunteer only if I want to, take the top off my jeep and overall, keep it moving. Oh, I see the children, grands and nieces when they remember I’m still here and if I’m up to it. Everything at my leisure. Enjoy Life!
I love the “ volunteer “ only if you want to- my wife cannot stand all this volunteer because you are no longer “ relevant “ but we need your money or time to run “ our organization, school, foundation but you are not going to get paid for your time or effort…….forced volunteerism is slavery no matter what “ fuzzy words “ you may receive as a reward……..she helps when she wants to but knows how to say NO…….
One norm I detest is synthetic fabrics. I only wear cotton, linen or wools.
You rebel, you.
I tossed or donated all my clothes made from synthetic materials. 😂
I detest synthetic materials even in handbags and shoes.
Same here.
'Microfiber' is another word for plastic.
I'm a guy. Your channel seems to appeal to the other half of the gene pool judging from the commenters. BUT I just love your down to earth attitudes and advicce. Lots of good stuff for all. Thanks, you're doing a great job.
Was just reading a month old comment from a guy who crochets in public. Judging by all the cool comments, I reckon you'll be fine!
Sleeping and waking when your body WANTS is the ultimate luxury (that should really be standard). Ready for a 24-hour world.
I heartily agree. Most of my life this is what I desired. Now that I retired this is what I do too. Go to sleep late and get up late. It' feels,good. ❤
I honestly have no clue what my optimal sleep schedule is
Leaving my toxic family and the abusive ex was liberating. I do what I want, when I want. I've been eating alone in restaurants for years, and it has truly never bothered me. I have a job I really like in an amazing part of the world, and I'm about to upgrade that. And I'm constantly having people tell me that they're envious. I tell them that they could do the same, and they swear they couldn't. Their loss.
I've never had a problem eating alone in any restaurant either. Baffled my ex who I think used to surveil me while he was having his affair (makes them think everyone is). Living alone grows character.
Oooh, what job do you do?
My husband is 82 and I am 81. We have already signed up to be body donors at a local medical school and we plan to have NO funerals! Our children are all on board with our decisions-we didn’t ask, we told them. If our friends and family want to honor us, they can do it now while we’re alive and we don’t intend to enrich the funeral corporations.
Are they really onboard if they were told? wwhen the grief hits them they may need to have that ritual to honour you or it may benefit them in their grief?
Seriously! My Mom died two years ago. My Dad and I had her cremated (and we shopped around for pricing🙀) with no funeral/urn/memorial bs. We’ll scatter her where and when we’re ready.
Same!!
It's your corpse--you're just busy with it right now. Once you're done with it you can give it to someone else to do anything they want with it. It's nobody's business but yours what happens to your corpse, not even really your spouse's.
Me too! I’m donating my body to science! No funerals! My husband wants the same.
For forty-five years I have been a vegetarian and I have gotten a lot of flack for it from my family. I never wear a wedding ring. We never had china or silverware either. We sold our house because my husband did not want to maintain it and it stressed him out to own it. I have not had my hair cut professionally for twelve years. I have a couple of tops and jeans. I am a minimalist with only the things I use and love. I need solitude and hate gossip. I enjoyed this video and everyone's comments!
It's been about 30 years since I went to a hairdresser. It's curly and no one could even tell if it was unevenly cut, so I do it. I like my brown/grey color mix and a bun on top is super easy. Never would go short again.
I believe there is a conspiracy to keep us going to salons, mocking anyone who admits they cut their own hair. I say admits because you cannot tell who does and who doesn't. Even the most militant frugal RUclips channel stars do not cut and style their own. I don't like to be fooled with and I don't like having hair that looks like everyone else's.
I’m the only woman in my neighborhood who does the “men’s “ work: mowing, mulching, manually de thatching, raking, hedge trimming, pruning, tilling, planting, organic fertilizing, bird house and feeder building, shoveling snow and de icing. It’s great exercise and I enjoy it. Every other house around me has either a husband or hired help to do manual labor.
Same here. I have 1.5 acres and tons of trees. Lots to take care of. I've got a regular chainsaw, a pole saw, a de-thatcher, couple of wheelbarrows and a yard wagon, shovels and rakes galore, you name it. I was using a pitchfork earlier today because my pine trees dropped a bunch of needles, and I mean a LOT, in the last couple years. Got myself a couple "haystacks" going on. LOL I enjoy trimming my own trees and cutting off dead branches. Unfortunately, the poor trees always look like they have a bad haircut. haha
I used to do all the yardwork even with my son, nephew, and boyfriend in the house. I just liked the exercise and being outdoors. Now I outsource the yardwork and only do my sidewalks during the winter, and have my plow guy do my long driveway. Do whatever works the best for you!
I’ve always done the yard work, landscaping…and any small “ fix it” jobs around the house ( including furniture assembly). My husband just doesn’t like any of it…so it’s up to me. I like to keep busy and feel good when I’m done. I did these things when hubby worked so just kept doing it…even though he is now retired.
Good for you! When my lawn guy told me that he was raising his rates per cut, I didn't sign up. I have 2 acres of land with lots of trees and it's not flat. Well, I got out my gas push lawn mower and did it myself I saved money and got a great workout. Similarly, I am the only house in my area who has a female yard person....me! I crack up when I see my nieghbors husbands on their sitting mower while I'm powering away with my own strength.
You had me at de-thatching.
I'm 50 years old. I don't go to funerals because it's "expected of me." If I feel the desire to go, I'll go, but unlike my parent's generation I don't see the point in going to a funeral to "show respect" or to "represent the family."
I liked your video and I appreciate your attitude! Thanks!
But you know, Yogi Berra said, "If you don't go to your friend's funerals, they won't go to yours." 😆
😂
On sleep cycles, been a "night owl" all my life. I'm 63, have had to get up early for jobs of course, never really adjusted, just tired all the time. I can now follow my natural sleep cycle and feel so much better physically. I no longer care about the negative judgement from many morning people toward night owls. ( lazy, somehow irresponsible, "unwilling" to get up early etc.) They would feel awful staying up until 12:30 or 1:00 am every night, I feel awful getting up early.
I'm a night owl too up at 9, bed at 2.
Night owl since birth! My mother worked in a factory and had to be there by 7:00 am. As a single mother, she had to "deal" with me when she got off work because I was wide awake. My babysitter loved me because I slept all day while my mother was at work. At night while my poor mother tried to sleep, I'd figured out a way to jiggle the crib and turn it into a slide. I'd roll out and go on big adventures around her apartment. She almost had a nervous breakdown trying to figure out what was wrong with me. The doc said some babies are just born with broken clocks! I've had to conform to the morning world most of my life. Now that I'm (gulp) 65, I'm not retired but I mostly work from home. I barely make it but I HATE getting up to an alarm clock. Doc appointments and lunch dates are always after 1:00 pm. And I take a nap when my body is tired.
I'm a night owl too! The judgement is terrible, it's a relic from the industrial revolution when everyone was expected to work in a factory. It is archaic and needs to end, as long as the work gets done it shouldn't matter when it gets done!
Been a night owl all my life and fought the rest of the world’s schedule all my life until retirement. Go to bed at 2 am and get up when I awake naturally whether 8 am or more likely 10 or 11 am. And if I fall asleep for a nap in the afternoon, well yep that’s fine too. It’s wonderful!
@@robingentry6987 Same, but my "clock" seems to drift. I sometimes end up going to bed at 3am or even 6 or 7am! Especially if I'm up all night online. (I might have a "problem". Heh-heh.)
A clock radio (remember those?) saved me from alarm clocks when i was 12, but now I'm not on anyone's time schedule so I wake when I wake. I've been leaving the blinds up to "wake with the light" (but I'll sleep through if I went to bed late). At least it's a _gentle_ waking, which is mainly what I was after.
I've always told people, "I'm at my best 2pm to 2am". On my first contract job, when I felt comfortable coming in later and working later, I had a button I sometimes wore on my coat lapel:
"Bright or Early
Choose One"
Love that.
I have aspergers and Im a male in my 40s. Im a nurse so i wear scrubs to work and I own no "fancy" clothes at all. I wear sweatpants, sometimes jeans, everywhere...if a place requires more than that I dont go there, and I have no desire to go to places like that anyway. I will never attend another wedding or other big social event. I dont like crowds and do not see any purpose to social rituals or protocols. My BFF is a lesbian who is ~16 years younger, and I wholeheartedly choose that (very supportive) relationship over any romantic relationship. I talk/text with her daily and spend time with her weekly but I cant spend too much time with any one person no matter how much I enjoy their occasional company, and if Im in a relationship that requires me to give up too much "myself alone time" I get miserable and resentful of that person, no matter how much I care about them. I live with another female friend Ive had since highschool who is as solitary a person as I am, if not moreso. I need to be on my own schedule, able to do what I want when I want (at least during my days off from work).
On paper, I look like a directionless slacker who plays a lot of video games (oh and D&D), is single with no kids and no ambition to climb career/social ladders...but Im actually a very successful nurse with a previous B.S. degree, I love nature and cycling, and Im a financially stable homeowner, it doesnt bother me when people sometimes treat me like Im "a manchild" because I know Im a hard worker, and I am pretty much wholly satisfied with how my life is set up right now.
You're my new hero ! 🤗❤
Bravo! I'm 63, neurodivergent and female. I regret that I tried to force myself to live a life I couldn't manage. Thxvm for sharing...
Im like the remale version of you, and my partner is similar to you too. Relationships are easier when you are both on the same wavelength. maybe its just an autism thing, i dont know.
People keep asking me why I don't get my masters. I'm 61 and tired. I make enough to live comfortably and that's enough for me. Some of my coworkers are still climbing the career ladder around my age and I'm like "when are you going to relax and actually live?" I guess that makes me a slacker, lol.
Love that, all best wishes! I also can't stand big events, hard pass!
😂❤
I don't know if it's a social norm or not, but being unwilling/afraid to go out by myself. When I tell someone I'm planning on doing something, I'm always asked 'who are you going with?' and when told I'm going alone I get 'oh, I could NEVER go to a movie/concert/restaurant/whatever else by myself!'. I take week-long road trips by myself!
I can't travel with other people LOL. Their nonsense drive me nuts and I don't have time for that, least of all on my vacation.
I'm 58 and work from home, and I have adopted the "uniform" of black turtlenecks and black pull-on pants. I love not having to fret about what to wear anymore. I'm comfortable and coordinated--they're Garanimals for grownups! (Gen Xers who remember Garanimals, give a shoutout for matching the tags!) Thank you for being you, and sharing your positivity, insight, and humor with us.
Haha! Garanimals for adults - love it. I wish they would have had something like that when I was a young adult. It would have saved me so much time and effort and stress.
garanimals for grown ups. lolololol. I love that so much!
I wear pajamas all the time. I wear a dress to work in my yard because I live in Texas and it's hot. I get up in the morning in my pajamas work in the yard in my pajamas if not a dress. Then I take a shower and put on clean pajamas the only time I put on day clothes is when I'm leaving the house my friend says I'm the only one she's ever looked for a dress to work in the yard in as a gift
I found living alone, home can never be too small -- living with someone, home can never be big enough 😁 ... there's no getting away
😂
That is so true!!
I’m in my sixties and I appreciate the concept of this video.
Norm 1: Dishes and cupboards - When we renovated the kitchen, I thought that it would be most practical to forego new cupboards and just install two dishwashers. I already load and unload the dishwasher. Why do we bother with the extra steps of putting dishes in cupboards and taking them out of cupboards? Label the dishwashers. One would hold clean dishes and as I used them I would put them away in the second dishwasher. When dishwasher two was full, I could run the load and then that becomes the source of clean dishes for a couple of days. My wife did not go for the idea, but I have an uncle who did.
Norm 2: I rarely answer my door when a stranger rings.
Norm 3: Like you, I don’t have guest stuff. Our last stay over visitors came about eight years ago. The spare bedroom is now a gym. No need to have that equipment in the basement. I like to see out the window. (Spare bedroom three is an office.)
Norm 4: In the summer, we cook a load of chicken breasts and don’t turn the oven on again for a couple of weeks. No AC, so we don’t want to heat the house unnecessarily. We eat the same tasty meals pretty much every single day anyway.
I have been planning my retirement home and the kitchen will have two dishwashers. They are more space efficient than the traditional cupboard and cabinets and are actually less expensive than most high end cabinets! A double win!
Some kitchen cabinets are needed. But not twelve linear feet of them!
I am rethinking many of the features of this home that is for an older version of me.
@@scottbrown7415 So practical!
I like the dishwasher idea
I also like the dishwasher idea.
@@piktormusic2538 I have been pricing out new cabinets. The second dishwasher is far less expensive than good cabinets and takes up less space! I will have some cabinets that will be used for pots and pans and the overflow when one of the dishwashers is maxed out and I need a little extra room to keep something
60, married and childless by choice.
Painted our walls rich jewel tones.
I loath the phrase, “be nice now”.
I have a kind heart and gentle hands.
I eat off my good china everyday.
❤❤❤❤❤🎉🎉🎉🎉
Same❤️
Each room in our 1200 sq ft house is 3 colors. Think, deep turquoise with lighter turquoise on the opposite 2 walls. We are lousy painters, but everyone is too busy looking at the colors to notice. 😅
Hate the command "Smile!".
I use my sterling flatware even if I'm using a paper plate or bowl. 😊
Im a very independent 58 yr old woman. I love repairing things myself. Electrical, woodworking, plumbing..you name it. I also like to sew and knit. Was married at a young age but have been single for many years and loving it. I dont have any interest in dating. I am living my best life doing what i please and spending my hard earned money on what i want withouth having to explain. Pinapple and ham on pizza is yummy! Glad to find so many like minded people out there. 😊
I found your comments on rising at 3:00 AM and going to bed at 7:00 PM interesting. I have never been a morning person. When my husband was alive, I tried to keep his schedule but after my husband passed a year ago, I have slowly worked myself into a schedule that allows me to sleep so much better. It is just the opposite of yours. I go to bed at 2:00 AM and get up at about 9:00 AM. It just seems to be what my body wants. I have a niece who lives on Vancouver Island. It is beautiful there. They live in an old house in Brentwood Bay. My sister who is 94 married a Canadian. I live in coastal North Carolina. I love your channel and watch all your postings. I am loving living alone. I loved my husband dearly, but he created a noisy household. I miss him, but not the TV. I have decided this is my time.
The lockdowns and social distancing were a great time for many people to discover what they truly want and don't want. Personally, I am now more me than I ever was before.
I preferred it. I stay home and when I go out I'd like people to stay 6 feet away from me, stop unnecessary talking and get out of the way. Your squealing children are sooo hideous
Although I’m in a long term relationship of 13 years, (after a horrible 13.5 year marriage prior), I will not ever marry this man. lol. That sounds terrible. Not because he is horrible…he is lovely and sweet. But because the convention didn’t work for me the first time, nor him. We own a home together, keep all other finances separate, sleep in separate rooms, have separate hobbies, and adore each other. Pretty darn happy this way. ❤😊
Love this!!! Good for you (both)!
That sounds lovely!!!
Sounds perfect ❤ winner winner chicken dinner 👍💕
@@ellenmulcahy1575 lolol😂
My husband of 35 years passed away a couple of years ago. I was devastated and couldn't imagine how I would go on alone. Well, I have done just fine and am enjoying so many unexpected aspects of my new life! I'd always been a very traditional wife and mother. I decided to remodel my house and run around all the time in stained work clothes with no makeup. I'm always learning and trying new things now. I love the freedom living alone and getting older bring!
I’m also an “odd duck” and always have been. Have always lived life the way I chose/choose. Chose to marry and I did. Had children that I wanted. Have had a career which I am now leaving by my choice. Husband passed away when I was 52 and have been alone by choice since then. Can paint the house whatever color I want, eat what and when I want and soon will be able to get up when I want, go to bed all the time. I’m also with you on style. I’m so glad that there are more of us than I anticipated. Odd ducks unite!
Proudly quackers. 🦆😁💪
Oh, Mary Dunford! I like THAT!
I am 65, married, with adult children. This year I made the decision to move back into my own house in another area. I love having my own space, my own life…and peace. My husband is fully supportive. Our relationship is better than ever.
82 y.o. widow
Live alone by choice
Have a very special man in my life, we date, shop and see shows together. I have a good relationships with my grown children & extended family. I need help with a few things that I can't physically manage and my daughter who lives close helps me as needed. My life is good, and I am still down sizing. and decluttering from my more complicated past.
I relate to your thoughts and lifestyle thanks for sharing
Meanwhile I have friends that are loathe to let out they have separate bedrooms.
I would also need separate living situations.
Chronically single by choice
Quiet time in am is the best!
@@patriciademars7496 Dido!:)
Separate houses sounds wonderful! I'm 67 and married 48 years this July. We've lived in the same house since we married. We're out of space. I've given up on keeping house because of his clutter and just joined him. I don't want to live this way and everyday I have visions of living alone. I really believe it's affecting my health. 😢
Just because I live alone does not mean I am lonely.
If I realize Im not enjoying a show , I just stop it midway through and turn the channel, who cares, nobody else is watching so why endure even a moment of a show I dont like or am not enjoying- such a luxury!
I quit books in the middle if I lose interest. Why read a boring book when there are so many good books in the world?
Same here with jigsaw puzzles. I thoroughly enjoy working them, so if I come across one I don’t enjoy it goes back in the box.
@@jenahyslip8292 Oh yes, I gave myself permission to abandon any book at 50 or so pages.
I never buy books or movies. I borrow them from the library because if something doesn't grab me soon, I don't waist my time at all. I enjoy Netflix for the same reason.
Oh yeah. I quit Outlander midway. 😂😱
I don't have special towels, blankets, soaps, dishes, or silverware either. As I've gotten older, I realize every day I wake up is a special and precious day, so I'm using all of my "speacial" stuff now. Thanks for sharing! I truly enjoyed this video!
I grew up with the notion (or social norm) that 'fun' has to be earned. In other words, you don't get to start playing and enjoying yourself until or unless you get all your work/chores/obligations done FIRST. Now that I'm in my fifties I finally realize that this is nonsense. Being happy is a birthright and enjoying life isn't something you need to earn. IF I want to stay in my pajamas all day, read books and lay on the couch - that's what I do, guilt-free. Just to be clear; I'm not talking about abandoning responsibilities like paying bills or fulfilling commitments - I'm just advocating for people to devote more time to PLAY and less time to working hard because they think they NEED to do that in order to deserve doing fun and frivolous things.
I've also never married or had any desire to have children. I remember my aunts, mom, relatives saying "You'll change your mind when you get older." Well, I'm older and realize that was the best decision of my life, other than quitting smoking.
I'm 79, married, self-employed writer, one adult autistic son, with my own list of "I don't have time for this nonsense." As a writer, I do need a LOT of alone time, outside as well as inside, but...happily married to someone. Just not joined at the hip 24/7. My list starts with clothes: no more skirts, no more high heels. Men's jeans because pockets, better material & last longer, not skin-tight or "fashionable." Men's or unisex T-shirts and turtlenecks (in winter.) Dress-up is "nice" slacks, nicer top, comfortable shoes. Flannel sheets year 'round because they feel good to me. Sleep patterns have also changed, and now include a near-obligatory afternoon nap, later bedtime, getting up just before dawn. I do wake up at 3 am, but only briefly. Books: we have bookshelves on every possible wall of every room. I am not "culling" the shelves heavily: I re-read books I like and discard books I don't like w/in the first week. As a writer living in a very small town with very limited library, I need my own research library and it's all around me, including an earlier edition of the OED. I like the music I like and ignore the music I don't...all my records, tapes, CDs are music I like. I still have enough china and flatware to entertain 20 easily---and use whichever (formal, informal) I feel like at the moment. Am using surviving bits and pieces of my great-grandmother's for dessert plates because why not? Our son has no interest in most of these things and will inherit the stuff he wants. If something breaks I don't worry or grieve (OK, the big cut-crystal pitcher...that might provoke a tear, because it's so gorgeous when the sun hits it, but I've already survived the broken dinner bell, two goblets, and a bowl. Friends are more important than inherited pretties. My interests also don't fit the social norm...I still have horses (don't ride as much, due to multiple concussions with consequences) and play with swords. That's getting harder, but I'm still doing stabby and swinging (sabre) things. Puncturing or slicing water bottles hung from tree limbs--FUN.
Now you sound like someone I would like to be friends with 😊
Based on your self-description, I suspect you are one of my favorite authors (EM).
Moved from US to Ireland and recently to Hungary. Introvert. Faith-filled. Just turned 59+1 😂 Very content and grateful. Would be grand to have a mugga tay with any of ye! We are all walking on the same path, separately. God bless ye!
I am so happy I discovered your channel! I am a single woman, 60 and love living alone. You are so motivating, Thank you very much! 😊
I’m 64 and, as soon as I retire, my wardrobe will be jeans and t-shirts except for funerals or weddings, and I don’t plan on wearing dresses. I don’t have investments, so nothing to compare there. I don’t decorate for Christmas at all- red and green make me anxious (a real thing). I love pineapple on pizza! My personal non-conformity is that I refuse to shave anymore. I don’t care and I don’t wear shorts or dresses or sleeveless tops, so there is no need to waste my time.
Dresses can be the most comfortable thing you own if you get loose and flowy and wear flat shoes
I quit shaving everything (except my armpits because I get a rash if I stop shaving them) back in my 30’s. And, you know what? No one has cared.
I haven't shaved in years. The hair stopped growing on my pits and legs , so I stopped buying the razors.
I’m 64. I shaved for a year in HS: waste of time!
I'm 63, self-employed, never married and with you on about half of these norms. I've always done my own thing - the people who know me don't care and the people who care don't know me. As I get older, I find the biggest change is that I don't try to hide it anymore. When I was younger and my parents were alive, and I worked in an office, I tried harder to fit in but now I can do what I want, when I want, how I want. I suppose some would call it "living an authentic like and being true to yourself."
Well said, feel same
I would call it living a good life!!
It's like a meme I once saw. What a 63 year old woman shouldn't wear? The expectation of others.
I agree. I will wear my straight leg jeans
Forever, I wear what I want, eat what I want! Don’t follow anyone’s rules
Linda, I know it doesn't matter how we look at whatever age we are... but just wanted to pass along a compliment that you have aged very well!
I'm a 68 yr old woman who lives alone in the middle of nowhere with 2 cats and a horse. I've been here for 18 years. I used to have a herd of horses but now I just have one. I used to spend time with "friends" but I really don't do that anymore. My 'friends" invite me to lunch, but I no longer accept their invitations. I no longer have time for anyone but myself.
One social norm I don't follow is wearing your shoes in the house. No one (not even guests) are allowed to wear shoes in my house. I think it's fantastically disgusting to drag the world's dirt, feces, germs, vomit, etc into my home. Perhaps this started because I've worked at a hospital my entire adult life and I see all of the nasty crap that hospital workers walk in. Or maybe it's because I grew up in a house that was very unkempt with carpets and rugs that were always stained and smelly. P.S. Although I am married, for 24 years now, if I were to ever find myself divorced or widowed, I have zero desire to be in another relationship and until I found your channel, I always thought I was weird for feeling that way. I love my alone time and my own nest!
many cultures never wear shoes in the house. they get the ICK factor
am the opposite in that, living in the country side...soil ect is good for the home, earth is special. though i do work hard on getting rid of the old stuff...lol
I don’t know when wearing shoes in the house became a norm-I could understand it if you lived in a 15th century castle but in my house-leave the shoes at the door because that sharp little pebble wedged in the tread of your Nike is gonna eff up my hardwood floor!
I would love the no shoe rule, but I have two dogs so I don’t see the point.
I feel exactly the same about the shoes in the house and the relationship. Thank you!
I never iron clothes, and I don't even have an iron. as they say: if I can stand my own wrinkles, so can my clothes. 😄
I use wrinkle release on some of my clothes when it matters. The wrinkles just go away.
Love that saying. I have an iron,have used it one time only
An iron I owned was unused for such a long time that a bunch of ants were living in it.
Love it! I hate ironing lol
😂😂
I’m 60 and live alone and answer to no one for the first time in my life. I’m only responsible for myself and it’s glorious!
I sometimes think my husband and I should live in separate wings with a shared central space. He's a borderline hoarder, I like empty space, air, and light. He's a night owl, I'm a lark. He likes having his feet uncovered at night, I can't sleep if my feet are cold. And so on.
Lifelong compatibility probably has more to do with worldview than the trivial things you mentioned.
I refuse to paint my nails and toenails, dye my hair, and wear makeup, high heels, or what is stylish. I don't decorate for Christmas (just don't love it). I have "weird" interests, and have no interest in what most others talk about. I have no top sheet, fancy linens, or guest things, either. I don't sleep with my husband anymore (pre-menopause, snoring, flopping over, and temp. differences made sleep impossible). I love to go camping and to restaurants alone. I eat mostly meat. I'm just an odd and independent soul.
Not odd, wonderfully self aware. I couldn’t give a rats arse what others think of me, break the rules, so what? Who’s gonna lock you up? Have a great life ❤🇬🇧🇬🇧
Amen, sister. I hate wearing makeup and nail polish. I love cotton, linen, natural things power to plastic materials like polyester, etc.
Let us feel comfortable.
love it💕
I don't dye my hair. It used to cost me between $350-400 to have it done every 8 weeks. Then my hairdresser wasn't at the salon anymore, so I stopped going altogether because I simply couldn't be bothered 😂 that was 3 years ago and I love my natural golden brown hair
I have no time for insensitive, selfish, mouthy, rude people. A strong woman/man doesn't need to be nasty or loud to get their point across. Be kind. People are so lacking in good manners these days.
I’m neutral with many. I’m not rude, but I’m not “kind” either. No one gets to automatically demand kindness from me. I’m kind to myself by providing civil, unattached politeness to most, since most people at best hold no interest to me.
I love my single life. I'm 81, vibrant and healthy. I'm too fat, but I love my ice cream. I dieted since I turned 15. I don't know what happened, but I gained 14 lbs. I was not aware of eating more and we did not have treats. We had 3 hots and a cot. (LOL) Once I hit 80 I wrote a book and bought Blue Bell ice cream. I am like Garfield....round is a shape. I'm not overweight, I'm just under tall. Love your show.
❤❤
In 2019 I got baptized, told my bf our relationship had to change and when he realized that meant no sex, he was gone. Best decision I made! I go to movies, beach, travel, restaurants, and more myself. I do not want to marry again so I don't see point of dating. I get the rolled eyes look when I say I wanna do things God's way. Some assume you don't have a full life without a partner, but it feels like freedom to me. Do what I want when and how I want. Sometimes lonely but most often not.
Out daughter finally divorced her abusive husband and is constantly being asked who she is dating . After her divorce she did date for awhile but found out that the world of “ dating” was full of more controlling men, a couple of sociopathic dates and men who wanted to rush into a relationship way too early so she stopped dating and tells ppl if GOD sends the right man into her life she will think about it… but she was so damaged by her ex She is happy to live with her dog , works hard to support herself and loves the freedom to do what she wants when she wants , ……
Mejor sola que mal acompañada.
You're already married by Biblical spiritual standards. You didn't grow a new hymen. That is false doctrine. The government is not how God defines marriage.
@spilledit.
She wasn't married. She had a boyfriend, not a husband. So they weren't married. And she says since he left, she didn't see the point of getting married anymore.
@@Cutandsew-h1i you lack wisdom
The social norms and trends trends of seniors that I avoid:
1. Partnerships/dating/marriage
2. New vehicles
3. Owning a home
4. Hanging out/friendships with only females
5. Gossiping
6. Striving for superiority
7. Religion
8. Formal volunteerism
9. Travel and seeking adventure
10. “Badass” female mentality
11. Physical intimacy
12. Striving to fit into groups
13. Labeling people
14. Minimalism
15. Fashion trends
16. Wastefulness
17. Gambling
I don't really have a sense of what social norms are anymore. I do what feels right for me.
That may not be a good thing for others, unless you live like an hermit.
@@dudanunesbleffHow is it "not good for others"? As long as they're not acting like jerk to people, how does not following social norms hurt anyone?
AMEN! PREACH! I am not pathetic! I LOVE my solitude. I just found your channel, wish I found it sooner. Oh, and just because I'm a single woman not looking for a mate does not mean I like girls!
😅
The best thing about passing 60 is that your "give a schitte" completely breaks. because you learn that most of it never really mattered. So if it does not improve your view of the sunset, then it does not belong in your life. Cheers from Lake Mohawk, NJ!
I’ve decided recently that I’m no longer buying into the norm that my aging face needs “repair” or “correction” beauty products.
Aging is normal.. and while I will still maintain skin health with sunscreen and a good diet, I’m no longer buying into the belief that any wrinkle I form needs a “drop of youth serum” so some company can make a buck off my insecurities….
I’m sick-of-it!!!
That marketing has women acting so hard on themselves and to each other.
And HRT ...
@@CoralBalmoral yes! That too!
Ponds is a woman’s best friend 😊
Separate housing is the best idea. You never have to be in servitude. Cleaning up someone's messes, doing their laundry, Cleaning
The house while they sit on the couch then act surprised or angrey
because you ask them to help! You won't end up paying their bills because conveniently they lost Or quit their jobs as soon as they moved in with you!
Agreed. In this social climate, the benefits of living alone outweigh those of living with a partner. It's far more equitable an arrangement if you don't have children. Sometimes, even if you do.
Oh my goodness, your video is so refreshing. I'm 55, live in my own little garden cottage by the ocean and I wouldn't change a thing. I work part-time and I'm childfree. My husband and I are living in separate homes but we're still good friends.
My roomies are a dog and two birds and it's great! Shoutout to pineapple pizza. My favorite.
Social norm I gave up long ago: caring what people think about how i look and dress. I shaved my long hair because I was tired of coloring it, let it grow back grey and it was soooo liberating. Next, I dress for comfort, not to “look nice”. Don’t get me wrong, I dress appropriately but forget about what is in style and I don’t care if the clothes are faded. Also, no makeup, it’s a waste of time and money.
I am older than you, was married for 48 years and have been single since my husband’s death. Despite those differences, I think very much the same as you on the majority of the subjects you mentioned. It’s refreshing to know there are other independent-thinking women out there.😊
My social norm-break is I don’t decorate at ALL for holidays. I don’t even know what it’s all about.
Holidays are for beers, music, hobbies and gaming--not for making a huge fuss over WHY it's a holiday :)
Love this! As a 59 year old single, this resonates. My Xmas tree is up in November too and I keep it up until Ukrainian Xmas. I buy presents for myself and stocking stuffers too. I wear what I like and have numerous outfits on repeat. Any relationship with a partner involves him having his own home as well. A good time involves playing the piano, reading or working a jigsaw puzzle. My animals are my family and I am content!
Eastern Rite Catholic? I grew up along side Ukrainian Catholics in the Wyoming Valley of NE.PA. really Kool that your priests could be Married and have kids .
I'm 67, been living on my own since I was 31. I sleep in the livingroom (bed and all), do not entertain, cook and bake the way I enjoy, lock the gates and go to bed at sundown, and wake at first light. Whether I choose to get up then, depends. I unplugged my TV probably 8 years ago, don't miss it. I recently have acquired a number of yard mowing and cleanup jobs, which give me a sense of accomplishment, some necessary cash, and exercise. I don't buy into the role of subservient, gullible twit, which I had in younger years. I like being alone (with my small dog). If I want to be around people, I do. My one regret is for years wasted trying to live up to expectations of others, college degree abandoned. I am content, however, now.
Iove it
I'm 56. My social norm breaks:
Purple hair.
Comfy clothes ONLY. Even my "dressy" stuff is cozy.
Fun clothes! (That are comfy). Hand-crocheted, fun colors and patterns.
"Stimming" as much as I please - moving my fingers, swaying, tapping my feet, fidgeting... no care what you may think.
Funky home decorating. It's cluttered, I don't keep it "showroom", and I'm surrounded with things and colors I love!
And the most important thing that I had to learn to do - I speak my mind freely. I'm kind, try to be tactful, but I no longer hide my feelings. (Opinions, I'm more discerning about sharing.)
excellent💕
- Autumn is my favorite season, so I don’t put up my Christmas decorations until the day after Thanksgiving (or later)…and then when winter gets dreary, the little lights stay cozy, so I keep the Christmas decorations up until March! 🎄
- I go to sleep at 3am and wake around everyone else’s lunchtime.
- Sleep with the bedroom at 65 degrees fahrenheit
- If I find a good shirt, I get it in every color and wear it (them) almost exclusively for the next decade.
- I keep pretty much only two pairs of shoes: summer sandals and closed winter walking shoes, plus a pair of slippers. These were rather expensive but will also last a decade with good care and replacing the insoles every 6 months. (I have held onto a few odd pair of other shoes for extraneous circumstances, like a pair of heels for a wedding, a pair of winter boots).
- I wear earplugs in loud restaurants (can hear conversation better over the noise)
- If the mood strikes and the company is good, I have been known to order two desserts
I feel like I could have written this! Thanks for sharing.
Embracing my hermit. I am quite a bit older than you, but at 60 I decided that I would embrace my solitude and stay home alone. I am done dealing with rude and obnoxious people.
Omigod...MY PEOPLE!! I love you all so very much. 😄
yes!!!! actual people!! not clones and wanna be's😂
Heck yeah fellow Gen Xer! Love to hear about women living life on their terms. It's not always easy. Loving your videos.
same here.
I’m in my 60s, recently diagnosed as autistic. I’ve been masking for so long, that I’m exhausted. I now no longer have the desire or energy to mask any more. I prefer to be alone, and I have a “uniform” that I wear (stretch pants, t-shirts, Crocs or tennis shoes). I like extending the Christmas decor because it’s some work to get the decorations up and down, plus I enjoy those decorations. I don’t like having guests at my home any more because then I can’t escape when I get overloaded. But NO, NO! TOILET PAPER MUST COME OVER THE TOP! 🤣🤣🤣
Absolutely! As a fellow autistic, toilet paper over the top!
Yes, lots of what she said reminds me of myself, and I am a late diagnosed highly masking autistic woman as well. The doctor who evaluated me recommended I find other autistic people to form community with because I find being around the normies to be tiring.
@@karenholmes6565 , there are some good RUclipsrs you might check out. The comments alone are worth their weight in gold. So many things I can relate to. Paul and “Autism From the Inside” is good. So is Mom on the Spectrum-I think her early works after she got diagnosed in her thirties were good, especially ones about the characteristics of autistic women. Many female autistics are underdiagnosed because we are capable of masking so well. You know this! 😊 Have you learned how to hide your stimming?😄 Instead of wiggling my feet (for which I got yelled at because it was distracting to the neurotypicals), I now scrunch my toes in my shoes. ONO Rollers and track balls help. There is a TEDtalk by an autistic researcher, and she wears a t-shirt with “Autistic” spelled out starting with the anarchist “A” in-a-circle. I got one of those shirts, lol! My diagnosis has explained SO many things in my life. And it’s not a disorder or a disability-it’s a difference.
I did toilet paper from the bottom my entire life until recently I tried over the top and it just feels right. LOL
Similar! But I plead an exemption on the TP roll: in my apartment’s small bathroom, the TP roll hangs from the vanity exactly at my right elbow. It must hang from the back because otherwise, my right elbow unrolls it to the floor.
Oh my gosh! I'm SO grateful I found you. I feel exactly the same way. I really LOVE living alone, am not looking for a significant other, etc. It's SO nice to hear another mature woman saying the same.
Welcome!!
Your first one is so so so so SO important to me. I am single by choice (mid 30s), but I've currently been sharing a house with someone for 6 years, and in a past relationship, and it is SO draining. I need my space to function FOR ME and to work for my mental health. HOMEostasis.The few times I've had my own space for myself makes life SO much easier and less stressful for me. I've reiterated to potential partners that I will only ever have my own space from now on and that they will have theirs. Period. It is so hard trying to explain this and be understood. THANK YOU for putting this one out there and making a girl feel heard.
Ill have bacon and eggs for supper. I greet everyone who catches my eye, especially dogs. I wear bright colours, I mean loud colours. I dont use a cell phone however I do use a tablet. I wear a hat. 😂😂
Hahaha I had bacon and eggs for supper just last night! 😂
I enjoy breakfast for dinner more than breakfast. I can’t eat much in the morning and hate the smell of breakfast food cooking in the morning. I have no problem with it later in the day.
I love all my hats!
I see a free person. At least freer than most. Thank You!!!
It's so great seeing more women openly talking about being single and loving it. I carried so much shame for a long time both for being queer and for not being super interested in dating and relationships. I still wasted a lot of time trying to meet all sorts of societal expectations. There was a ton of pressure on me to date men, so I did and I regret all the wasted time and the trauma that came from some of those experiences. Middle age has been so freeing. I am very protective of my time outside of work and have gotten better at setting boundaries.
I hear you! 😊
I keep smiling as I listen to this video because I thought I was the only one thinking like this! You are a breath of fresh air Jen!
I am so happy I found your channel! I am 55, single and childless by choice. I have recently decided to stop caring about what people think or expect from me. It is exhausting. I've started doing what makes me happy and I have learned to say NO whenever I feel like it. Thanks for your videos!
I am so glad to have your vlog pop on my feed! I love your channel name and your 'take no prisoners' attitude. I am widowed since 2019. I was 60, my hubby was 61 and I found him on the floor dead on December 22. I'll never forget because I was going to my last day of work for the year. We buried him on Christmas Eve, which may sound strange but worked well. We are family farmers and about 20 years ago my hubby started setting up a 'Farmer's Christmas Party' at a local restaurant for all the area farmers. He figured businesses have holiday parties and farmers should, too. It was all planned out. So that was our funeral luncheon. The restaurant picked up the tab for the family, which was very nice.
My youngest sister is always asking when I am going to sell my home. Do I need a 4 bedroom home? No, it's just me and my dogs. Two of the bedrooms are closed off. One is my "yarn vault". But my home is paid for and all I pay is property taxes and utilities. So about $700 a month. Where else would I live for that? And I'm still on the farm, but have family close by. My daughter lives about 2 miles south of me, my nephew lives 2 houses north, and my youngest son lives about a mile north.
We never had good china. When we built our home, my mum told me I'd regret not having a dining room. I don't. Not at all. Why would I want a room that was only used occasionally? When my mum passed away, my sisters kept asking if I wanted a china set. That's not how I entertain. When we have friends over, we use our very best Dixie plates.
I wear what I like, what makes me feel good. Usually jeans, tshirts, and tennis shoes. Not those big bulky tennis shoes, but the flimsy beach kind. Or sandals. Or boots. No heels. Moccassins are good, too. As for clothes, I make or buy a few pieces every year, but I have sweatshirts from when my kids were in high school. That was over 10 years ago.
I'm still employed and enjoy what I do. I work at a university maintaining the database and managing our student employees. I love it. In my off time, I knit, write, draw, and learn new skills. My older son is getting married in September, so I'm teaching my grandsons how to dance. Just basics like the YMCA, Electric Slide, Cupid Shuffle, etc. We tackle one a week, so we have a few dances ready. And they get to help me with jobs around the house. At 10, 8, and 7, they love it.
Would you adopt me? ❤
This blog makes me feel so normal, thank you ❤
I am sixty now, and have stopped trying to fit in about 20 years ago. It gets easier and easier.
I live alone too. When I get home from my job at a school, I sigh with relief. I love being alone.
I'm with you on the clothes! I wear soft comfortable clothes every single day. When I find a shirt or pants that feel great, I buy several and keep them for years. I've even created a uniform to wear at home and a uniform to wear at work. It just removes a lot of anxiety to have something soft and familiar on my body at all times.