How Grief Changes Us!
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- Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
- Grief changes us. Learn how it changes us for now... and how it changes us forever. Learn my radical thought about Grief. Learn the two most important questions while grieving!!
Learn more about the community of support for our Grief that I am creating.
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chipper-pionee...
Leave your comments about how you feel Grief has changed you. 🙏
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RUclips Video • How Grief Changes Us!
Video hashtags: #grief #griefsupport #JoMcRogers #grievolution
RUclips Channel: / @grieftherapist
Thanks for watching and commenting! If you are interested in having a private support community for your Grief let me know where to send the updates! chipper-pioneer-5821.ck.page/7f47c50016 💞
Hi Jo, I have tried twice to leave my email to join, when I put my details in it sends me an email where I have to click on the link to co firm but that just takes me through to a page by convertklik that asked for a login or to register, is this correct? Should I register? And thank you for your videos, it’s almost 11 weeks since my husband of 36 years died. I am struggling with the pain of his loss but your videos really help x
Thank You I hate my city. Its the biggest small town in Texas as we say. I have not moved on from my mom and my dad who i am not close to recently passed away. This loss was hard because we didn't get along. I was broken after my mother . My dad went through hell falling breaking hips placement All on just my husband and I.
@@kaylynnhuddleston5533 ☹️That’s so touching and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all loss our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but death is just inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday, and every of our love ones we’ve loss will want to see us happy wherever they’re. Hope you’ve found peace, comfort and happiness again?
Your videos are a blessing, thank you so much.
Thank you 🙏🏻 so much for making this informative, comforting video. Everything I’ve gone through you mentioned in your video.
It scars you
It mauls you
It confuses you
It drains you
It is absolutely devastating🥺😞
@@carolinewoods830 lm soooo sorry for your loss😔.....You can't live with it, you have to learn to around it😢.... If the most surreal feeling I ever experienced in my life
True ,,,
I would like to add one to your list please… “it muted me”. Regardless of if it is by death or chosen distance/abandonment, the only way I get through it is through God. He is truly the only one who cares. 🙏🏻❤
@@dawn4999 Agreed...I have a very strong circle of friends and family but God is the way♥️💯
@@mrsmukk ♥️
I understand so well all the comments here. I lost my wife two years ago . I ache for her every minute . To hold her hand , hear her voice , feel her close to me , and most of all to to be loved by her . My love for her will never fade , nor will the memories of our wonderful life together . She made me a whole person . Supported me and believed in me . She gave me confidence and joy . I am now a shadow of my former self . My life has become a nightmare that I cannot escape from . I send my love to all on here who grieve . The tears I am shedding now are my gift to you all ....
@Xp1972. How are you holding up a month later? Did anything change? I lost my fiancee 4 days ago. Reading such comments makes me think I might just as well give up now, because there's no hope whatsoever. If this is a loss you don't ever recover from, why should I even bother trying...
I've lost my firstborn son suddenly, tragically and violently. I know I will never be the same again. All my reactions are different. No one tells you that you can go through all the stages of grief on one day. I drop things, I make shocking decisions, I'm too outspoken and mostly I have an inferno of rage burning 🔥 inside me like a forest fire that can't be extinguished. I'm even angry at God. When people preach to me in trying to fix me, I become infuriated thinking where was God when my son was ripped away from this world and our lives. No one tells you that you will lose friends, even relations because they tire of your grief or do not like the new hurt version of you and they don't tell you the first 24 months will often involve feeling stunned, suffering PTSD and the second year is somehow even harder as so many people fall away. CS Lewis said "I never knew grief felt so much like fear" That dreadful anxiety of fear knowing yet not understanding something is missing then the awful awakening yet again that it's your child. The fear that you will lose more children. You become ridiculously overprotective. The sadness when family stop talking about him. When no one mentions his name and the grief is still raw. They've lost a sibling. You've lost a child formed inside you. Plainly put, it's hell on earth.
Well said. My youngest son was killed 18 months ago. I am not the same person and I never will be. I am grateful, blessed that my other son did not die. A rollercoaster of fear, anxiety, disbelief, hopefulness, devastation and I feel I am operating outside myself. I feel for you, I really do. I will pray for you and your family.
You are so right. Nobody understands unless they've been through it and everyone deals with it differently. It is horrifying.
@@Lisabug2659 I'm so deeply sorry for your loss Lisa. Mine's been 10 years but it feels like it was last year.
You are absolutely right. I’m furious at “God “ too. If people get comfort from religion I’m glad for them ; none of my prayers have been answered.
Really sorry to hear your pain sometimes we just need people there without them saying anything❤
47years of my life With Elizabeth She was my air and my light. Who am I now..
Losing my 36 year old daughter to mental illness less than a month ago has been the worst and hardest thing I’ve ever dealt with , my heart is broken in many pieces
all my love to you, i wish i could hug you, no words just big hugs that envelope you and hold you in this very sad hurting time, i am going through the same thing, and its the worst time of my life, i cried so hard that my heart actually hurt so much, all my love to you from greiving mum to another xxx
I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand the pain your going thur. I lost my youngest son to suicide he was 24 3 months ago. Its unimangable pain and grief to lose your child. So my prayers and hugs go out to you.
I lost my beautiful daughter yesterday. The whole family is devastated. I lost my father 6 weeks ago. The pain is terrible. I can’t think of anything. I had plans with both and I’m don’t know what I want in my life. 😭😭😭Prayers are the only consolation I have. I’m grateful to God for them. He blessed me with a great father and a beautiful loving daughter to walk with me part of my life. Going thru the pictures of them and remembering the good times in life.
I too lost my son February 25, 2023, he was 26, im devastated and find it hard to work, and I want to isolate as well. He was battling addiction that caused mental illness and ultimately his choice to leave this earth. It hurts so bad, there are never words that can change the situation, we have to teach our hearts how to accept what we can’t change. I find joy in knowing he’s with the lord and no longer in pain. But me, I’m the one in all the pain now, but that’s ok, I would take all his pain for him to have joy and Jesus knew that. All I can say is trust God, other than that there are no words for this type of loss-a child
Sending my love to you.
After losing my son, I don't expect to feel alright. My faith is my expectation is to see him again on the other side.
Faith is really important to internal peace ☮️. I see a psychic medium to connect to my grandmother 👵 who passed away at age 72 in 2003.
This is horrible, I lost my wife 5 weeks ago, I never knew this type of pain existed. Life has no meaning anymore. I miss her so much!
My greatest fear! ♥️ I'm so sorry.
Courage!
The feeling is mutual.
I loss my best friend and love of my life; two months before our wedding day, he was murder and I miss him every single minutes of my existence. God loves You. Love & +Peace!
🎨😷😇🤩😎💐🌷🌸💔❤️🩹🤍🩵💙🙏
Same here but it’s been 6 months and I feel as you do but I know my late spouse would want me to do myself in. It is literally one step at a time. Getting out of bed and getting dressed is an accomplishment. It may sound like BS but the initial pain does move to a more bearable level. Yes just bearable but it allows you to stabilize your life. Sorry no easy answer
Should have read NOT do myself in
I’m so sorry … I feel the same way. It’s going on 4 months since my husband died and I don’t think I’ll ever get over it . I wanted to die with him .
I lost my husband in July. I died that day as well and my world stopped. I appreciate those who have been with me through it but some days I prefer to be alone. I don't want to be the old me. I hear people say this all the the time, you've your old time soon. The old me had a wonderful soulmate and husband, someone who was there for me. Now I'm a shell of myself. Yes, I have been on the edge of a cliff many times. I have those trying to push me to go to work but I can barely shop or drive without tearing up or melting down. I spend days cleaning and getting rid of unwanted things, I want to relocate and find a place to hide from the world that's out there. But I also know that God wakes me and has given me breathe today. I'm here for a reason. I will not stop grieving because I will not stop loving my husband because he passed on. True Love never stops.
Beautiful love you had xxx I'm so sorry for your loss x
I am elderly. My wife is in heaven. I talk to her. Visit her grave. Pray, read my Bible. I cry every day. I do my best to live in such a way that she can be proud of me. Love never dies. May God bless you and keep you. You will be with your husband in heaven. You will love one another even more tenderly. ❤️🙏
@@joeroberts788 Thank you. I have changed because God changed me. I now walk with the Lord and Savior and have found a new path until I am called home. I truly under how you feel. I know our spouses, children and loved ones are waiting in the Lord's garden for us when it's our time. Until then we have chapters in our lives to finish here. Prayers 🙏
I understand completely how you feel my spouse died January 8 2022 ,I have cried everyday . I am so empty lonely he was the love of my life we had 51 years together. I don’t see how I am going to make it ,every time someone ask how are you doing I start crying. I don’t know how to go forward I am lost . I also died that day .I have skin cancer melanoma suppose to have surgery,and thinking about not doing anything my life is over .I don’t know who I am , I don’t have a life without him 😢
@marshabowlin1757 you have chapters to go through first, then you will meet again, you have a purpose here just now
I have become closer to God and I get great fulfillment from it. My husband died 6 month ago and he studied scripture ongoing and that is what I am doing.
I'm the same as you Debbie. I trust God. At times I feel overwhelmed but then I go to Our Lord Jesus Christ who comforts me ❤
Me, too. Lost my husband of 20 years in 2021. God and my teen and young adult daughters have saved me.
If it’s helping you cope, it’s not harming anyone, great. Just don’t make the mistake of trying to make it into a type of “one cure fits all.” Not everyone holds religious beliefs as you do. Keep your own council.
My beautiful daughter passed away from breast cancer after bravely fighting it for nine years! My heart is broken, people just dont get it. My poor grandaughter, an only child has to grow up without her mother. I hope we can make it through this hell , but honestly there are days when the grief is too much.
I am soo sorry...💐
@@eon7125 thank you for your kindness, christmas will be sad again this year. The grief is always present. 😢
I lost my mom in 2008 and it was a long, hard process seeing her wilt away due to a second go around with uterine cancer. After she died, I lost my dad, and then died in 2016. I lost my job not long after that and wanted to die because no one would help me and I had been a caretaker for so long I wasn't certain what I was going to do with myself. I did get help and my faith got me through all of this. Though I will still miss my parents, I know I will see them again someday.
I lost my son in May 2021, and my husband in Dec 2022. The one thing I have learned is that grieving is not a process. It is a condition of the soul... that will never go away. I also learned that time doesn't heal anything.
I am not the same person I was on the day before my son passed. That person is gone forever, and isn't coming back. A part of me died with him that day in May. I was just beginning to learn to "tolerate" his loss, when my husband died suddenly, of a heart attack. So, I get to go through it all again.
I have mediocre days and bad days. I can't remember the last "good" day I had. I don't really have much interest in things I used to do. They just seem trivial to me now. I am not depressed, I simply feel indifferent to the daily grind. I'm not lonely, and I don't feel alone. I still have my youngest son, my daughter and my grandchildren. But, the absence of my boys will follow me to the end of my time here, because grieving is not a process. A process has a conclusion. Grief doesn't.
Well said. We simply can’t just get past it because death isn’t normal. But please know that it is NOT forever. Our creator never intended that we should ever have to deal with this, and he promises that it will not go on forever.
I’ve lost 10 members of my close family in just over 10 years, so I have an inkling of your feelings.
Im.deeply sorry for you.
Thank you for your comforting words,after l lost my mother to breast cancer,l 12:48 gave myself a couple of years to grieve and then volunteered in the palliative care unit in the hospital where I live. I was able to offer some alternative therapies, massage and reiki, in giving l believe we receive.🙏
Thanks for commenting. Grief is indeed a condition. Maybe it gets easier to deal with, but it's always somehow there. I am thinking of you.
As someone who has also gone through a devastating, life-changing loss in the last year-and a-half, I appreciate your frankness and you "telling it like it is" with your comment, here. Anyone reading your comment (and who feels similar) cannot only relate, but also have tremendous empathy for you.
I've half-jokingly said over the past months (after watching grief videos here on RUclips and reading articles on grief support websites) that it would've been fine with me if I wouldn't have become so empathetic toward people going through this, because if I had never had the experience with deep grief (where some days can feel absolutely overwhelming and more than you can bear, and lasting for months on end) then I would've never known what it was like. And no one could've prepared me for it, because they wouldn't have been able to explain it. Words simply can't describe what I've gone through (and continue to go through.)
It helps (a little, as nothing helps a lot) to read comments from others in a similar situation. You know you're not the only one suffering a terrible and awful life-changing loss when you see others who are willing to make public comments on it and how it has affected them. And I'm grateful for that, as it helps. Some. (If nothing more than from a "misery loves company" point-of-view.) And, you know you're not alone. (Although I wish none of us would ever have to feel THIS level of sadness.)
I've noticed that the comments that resonate the most with me are those that usually lack platitudes and cliches. Some people (such as grief counselors) know "the right things to say", but if they haven't experienced what I have (and on my level) then they simply don't know. Period. (But, don't get me wrong. There are well-meaning and sincere people out there who want to help others who are grieving. And God bless them for it.) But, unless they've experienced it, they truly don't understand it.
“Grief is the price we pay for love….” : Queen Elizabeth.
I lost my dad after a hard and long battle with Parkinson's disease, I have the satisfaction to be his primary care giver during his last years, love you dad.
You did well, my condolences and gratitude🌸. Your dad was blessed to have you in his life and you to have him in yours. RIP 🙏.
That's so nice you did that. He would have been very grateful I'm sure. Rick I also lost my Dad a few weeks ago and was involved in care with a care team and prior to this stage. Similar illness. How are you keeping? I'm finding it very tough. So many emotions and mainly it is surreal and life is void. Just wanted to reach out to someone in a similar position. My condolences to you also. I'm Ruple, my Dad's only Daughter from the UK. 🌷
I don't know who I am since my husband died. I know my life has changed. But still can't think about my future without him.
Totally agree. My Mother’s passing has had a profound impact on me. I am a shell of who I was w/her + cannot see ahead. It’s so strange w/o her. All I do is cry 😢 I miss her so very much.
Same with me
I'm so sorry you're hurting. I lost my husband too. I can't think about it. I am scared. I am lost. Seems like there is no future. Big hug for you!
@@lisabennett1253 I'm so sorry
@@lisabennett1253 It has be 7 months for me. I am finally to the point where I don't cry everyday. I still have days where it seems all is lost.
I lost my son suddenly 8 months ago and I just feel so sad every day! I put on a brave face to the world, but I’ve honestly lost interest in many things I once enjoyed. I also listen to other people talking about what I now think are very trivial problems and want to scream. I find myself isolating to protect myself from painful situations , can’t seem to find any joy!😢
I'm so sorry..
Ik how you feel I lost my only sibling a sister nearly 4 yrs ago---- I was so grieve striken I didnt shower for a month --- a good day I got my teetbrushed-- but not everyday--- I started having severe panic attacks--- eventually my mom got me Dr appt my blood pressure was so high she was worried i would have a stroke or heart attack--- my heart physically ached for the mourning and grief--- they say its my new normal--- I say my new normal sucks
My dear friend. I'm so sorry for your loss. I also lost my only son. My heart is with yours. I agree with her idea that we have to find a way to be who we are now since bereavement. Since there is no going back to who we were before. I guess this is our challenge.
I lost my 12 years ago its just like yesterday I no how you feel I feel people don't understand me my other son is got the same illness and I no I am going to lost him as well I got nobody because my 2 sister don't understand all I can say take care
I'm sorry Sharon x love from Ireland
I was a bereavement support worker until my dear wife was diagnosed with stage 4 bowel cancer. I thought I knew all the answers to dealing with grief. Since she passed earlier this year, I feel that life is pointless and every day is empty. I live for my daughter and pets. The pain is unbearable. Every morning I start from scratch and have to consciously motivate myself for everything I do. Even counting my blessings wears thin after a few minutes. Live is pure hell.
Gosh my heart goes out to you. I know exactly how you're feeling. Its unbearable some days.
Dear Bernie, I lost my wife of 47 years earlier this year. So we have this in common. I have now turned to the church and put my life in the hands of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. I am still lonely, heartbroken tearful and everything you are experiencing but never alone because He is always there. He WILL see you through the rest of your life.. God bless and keep you well.
Hello William
I’m so sorry about your terrible loss.
I’m so glad that you find comfort and solace from your religion.
I know what you mean i live fir my dog when she goes i pray God to take me to im 80 and not very mobile if insit in chair i fall ssleep
I completely relate. I force myself to get out of bed and do things but it’s like pushing a boulder up a hill. My husband shows no emotions . Insists he has to grove in private. Death of 29 year old daughter by a hit and run driver.
Losing my husband I discovered I had lost my identity as well, it's a long road as grief is forever, more intense at times than other times. I no longer sweat the small stuff as I've slowly evolved alone and I don't think I want another one, husband that is. I don't think I'd survive a shattered heart again, so much of it went when his battle ended. I don't wish this journey on anyone, grief is not something you can go around ,over or under...it's straight thru every painful tear and thought, lessening as time slowly ticks.
I’m sorry about you losing your husband. I really hope I don’t lose my parents who I’ve lived with my whole life.
I lost two sons and I will forever be broken. Time has not changed or helped me. 12:22
Everything changes. I'm so frightened and for the first time vulnerable without my husband. I can do things but I've lost my rock. I wish him back every day.
I lost my husband 6 months ago after caregiving 24.7, I am having physical and mental issues that you describe. Sadness comes in waves. I am alone 90% of the time. no family and few friends. With acquaintances I put on a "game face". My grief is a solo journey. thank you for being there.
Me too, alone on my journey and yes it comes in waves of sadness.
I'm so sorry for your loss and I send you my condolences. . I lost my husband a few weeks ago after a 6 month struggle and I force myself to build up small routines. Looking after myself every day to help regain my strength...... Just small steps like brushing my hair while the coffee is brewing....... Small routines to focus on my own well being and I feel happier thoughts about my husband too. Please take care of yourself, if you're alone it can be very difficult.
I too am alone on my journey as I lost my beloved husband 3 and1/2 months ago. 26 years together. Love and miss him so much.
@@user-zj1ig9ni3r this is so difficult...... I empathize with you. Life goes on........ I look a lot at photographs from our younger years.
I lost my mom 7-19-22 and I actually feel like I am more lost now. I miss my mom so much. I don't feel like myself at all. I find myself wanting to be alone all the time. Everything you've described is spot on accurate. A piece of me died when my mom died. I still need you, mom. I still need you. 💔
My heart goes out to you. I know what it's like 💔
@@LOVEisBLUE-k9j I hope you feel some sense of normalcy. The hardest days are ahead. Sent with love 💛
@@onlyonecacaNothing feels normal. There can only be a 'new' normal which I haven't arrived at yet.
I feel you about losing your Mom. I am 65 and miss my Mother so much. I wish I had something positive to say except hang on. Your Mother would not have wanted to bury you. 💔
Read my comment about hypnosis.
My only child, my son passed over 11 months ago and I’m still figuring out who I am and how I’ve changed from this loss. It’s a painful process that will continue throughout my life. I choose to continue to love and honour him in the best way I can in my grief by lighting candles, making his fav food, talking to him, going to his fav places etc. It brings me some comfort to know that his spirit is always around me like a warm embrace and I see signs that he is with me.
You are one brave mom. Of course your beautiful son is still with you.
I lost my husband recently but I feel he is encouraging me to move on. We had 30 fabulous happy years together. I Pray to him every day.
So deeply sorry.....
...there is one beautiful book from a lady that lost her daughter,...but can not recol nor the name ,of the book ,neither the name of a lady ...but i am shore xou will found out...God bless your heart and soul...❤🙏🏻🌹
My husband was murdered 20 months ago today. I live in the "whatever" zone. Apathy seems like the only place I can get any relief from the sadness and confusion. I hate my new life. I've had to put away all of his pictures and reminders of our life together. It's just too painful to see everyday.
I am so sorry to hear this story of great suffering. Thoughts and Prayers. ❤
I lost my brother six months ago. I find it hard to concentrate on things and I’m very forgetful now. I get upset quicker and easier over small things. It’s hard.
I lost my brother and housemate ten days ago. The place is so quiet. I can’t keep living here.
My partner of 10 years died a year ago. He was only 42. My heart literally hurt for 6 months straight and I lost a quarter of my body weight. My mom died when I was 13 and when my fiancé passed away i feel like I emotionally turned back into that 13 year old girl. It’s taken almost a year to just be able to BE around other people again and start thinking about moving back into the world again. Thank you for the video 🙏🏼💜
Yes, it hurts.
I used to think heartache was a metaphor. Then my son died, and my heart hurt.
My husband died 4 months ago.... a part of me died, too. Everything you have said is spot on. Thank you for what you do.
I was with my sister when she passed. I consider it a priveledge and a miraculous experience. I feel kinder and more compassionate. I appreciate those I had overlooked. I am acutely aware of my own mortality and so grateful for those who are living.
I lost my Mam 4 years ago to cancer. I was no stranger to death in my life but this utterly floored me. In her last days I fell to the floor and had a panic attack but at the time genuinely thought i was having a heart attack. After her death I felt like I was drowning so I went on a mad 'positivity' bender to try and not go under. I lost 13kg in 13 weeks, barely slept or ate and had unnatural amounts of energy. At first I thought it was positive changes but I hardly recognized myself. In the following months my marriage fell apart and i lost the love of my life. I still don't really know what happened. But it's like a double loss. I'm not the person I was and never will be. It still feels like I'm stuck in a nightmare I can't wake up from. But i know and have accepted it's real. For those who have yet to experience grief, if your loved one looses someone close to them, hold them close and hold them tight. They need you. Grief doesn't go away after a funeral. It's barely getting started. Thanks for this very realistic video 🙏🙏
So deeply sorry ......
I find myself, dear Jo, after two years I am feeling a sense of loss on accession, worse than it was in the beginning. The sense of loss rules me, but your gentle words are more substantial for me than a shore as I am sinking. I also feel like a fraud. I keep our home fairly neat, I can manage my little finances, wash, eat very little, but the grief rears up and makes name hopelessly. I keep seeing Mary looking at me her eyes twinkling and I cuddled her and kissed her forehead and said “I will ALWAYS be here for you” and she replied “That;s wonderful.” Three days later she died. Iost her, I had been caring for her for many years. I failed. I felt her fear of the unknown as she slipped through my fingers. I find now, Jo, that nearly two years later I am not any better. I am so unhappy and feel such failure.❤
I lost my husband back in August 12th 2022. I'm raising his two children. But I still accept michale to walk through the door and say baby I'm home I'm still having a hard time accepting his death. My health really did go down hill.
You have taken me through almost a year and a half of grief after caring for my wife at home in her vascular dementia. I cared for her at home almost ten years in all and she passed away in bed beside me and I closed her eyes. Your gentle words are a gift from God, dear Jo. Your general voice has a magic, a gentle power which encapsulates all the stages of grief I have experienced and with intervals you are always there for me. Sweet God bless you in your work kind lady. Everything you say resonates with me. Thank you, thank you. Edward Chisnall in Scotland.
Thanks Jo. My 14 year old son died suddenly from a medical complication just 2 months ago. The pain is indescribable!!!
So terribly sorry for your loss. The loss of my 29 year old daughter a month ago is painful beyond words too.
@@librarylover6414 I am so, so sorry for your loss 😭 💔. My heart goes out to you and your family. We belong to the same club. The club that nobody wants to belong to 😓. I wish you all the best. Lots of love ❤️
@@jennebeattie3168 sending you back so much love
@@librarylover6414 just be you ❤️
Pray, and talk, and talk some more, cry and cry some more. Let it all out , and I am praying for each & everyone of you. ..God bless you all x x x
I’ve lost my husband one year and 3 months ago and still feel the loss as if was yesterday. I simply just keep saying It want him back! After 63 years I have a hole in my heart that hat will never be filled . My children have been doing their best to help in every which way.I don’t want any new friends or help from groups, churches, psychiatrists etc. I have 2 friends who I keep in touch and they with me, I am 88 yrs old and want to live the rest of my life in quiet peace and prayer. Also looking forward to when I will be with him again! I still keep wanting him back!!! Your comments were great however I still don’t think I can follow them because I don’t understand why I should do that his! It won’t make me feel better or happier or fill the hole in my heart. I just want to be with him. l JUS
Therese Ryan, your story is so much like mine, I just had. to respond. My husband died 11 months ago. We had been living with our daughter for a year as he had dementia and I was letting my health goto the point I was ill. We had been married 72 years when he had a stroke. He had to go to a nursing home. I had promised I would not put him in a home and it has preyed on my mind as he suffered so much there before he died. I am 89 years old he was 93. We fell in love as soon as we met and it is so hard to live without him. I am in a new town with no friends here. Everyone is very kind and I do have family nearby. I feel like a fish out of water and don’t want to be grieving around them. I cant go through his clothes yet. My daughter has been very understanding as she lost her husband two years before. She does as much as she can and I am grateful to her. I pray you will feel less grief as time goes by.
...prayers for your lovely heart and soul, ...❤do not be so sad, your dearest husband knows that , and that makes him sad too....staying in prayer, is best way to instantly calm you down, at least for a short moment, ...but be in love , and prayers, for peace, and leting God's love fill your heart and soul...❤...Gos bless you lady...
I lost my mother when I was 17. My father died in 2007. My son died 2 yrs ago aged 32. The loss of a child FAR exceeds loss of parents.
Whoever we lost will want us to be happy … ❤️❤️🌸🌸
We need To realise that we did what we did at the time was what we knew best ..
Birth death old age illness are part of life …unfortunately..
Every breathe we are closer to our own exits …
We are b/w birth and death so please :
Let us move forward in TLC … to ourselves and others …
Every day is a new day so let us pray for the souls of our loved ones who we have lost ….
🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🕉️✝️☸️✡️🔯☯️🛐🩷🩷🩷☮️💟🌸🌸❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Peace ☮️ and love ❤️ to all of us healing ….. ❤️🩹
Last November l lost my wonderful husband of 53 years. He passed quickly of a previously undiagnosed heart issue involving electrical conduction We had no previous symptoms
It was like half of my soul had been ripped away from me. He is was here one day and gone the next. We had been college sweethearts and spent three quarters of our lifetimes together Married since I was 22 years old, and losing him at age 75. 53 years together. It’s been nearly eight months now and my grief if as strong as it was on the day of his death .
I have sleep issues, I cry every day, I feel deep, profound despair. He was a good, decent, caring person . I scream at God for taking this good man and leaving the world’s villains untouched.
I have been lucky to have a supportive family and circle of friends, but it isn’t enough. I don’t have my beloved husband and the world seems so much more diminished.
He's still with you just in spirit now. I lost my mom 11 months ago & she "shows" herself to me in dreams and coincidences.
Regardless I miss her so very much. The pain doesn't let up. A piece of me died when I lost mom.
My saving grace is knowing I WILL see her again when it's my time to go to heaven. I hesitate writing this bc I feel extraordinary sadness for you but I had to share in hopes that you get 1 minute of relief or possibly Crack a smile bc a girl on the internet took time to encourage you & validate your pain. Sent with absolute love & light- Jessica ❤️🩹🫂🫶
@@onlyonecaca Thsnk you for your empathy and understsnding
😔
I Lost my 22year old son February 11th 2021 oh my heart is so broken 💔😭I am a Christian women I stand on Gods promises daily We both where believers in Christ it feels like yesterday feels like there are days I can’t breathe 😢this is so horrible I just want my son home
Your son is in paradise, you will be with him for eternity. Talk to your pastor. You need healing. 🙏🏼🙏🏼
I know you know your son is in paradise, that is where my daughter is, but heaven feels a million miles away, and even though it is the truth and heaven is the most wonderful things from the Lord Jesus, it doesnt take away the fact you want to hold them and talk to them and carrying on your life with them, thats what us mother do, don,t we and so I am with you personally and i know how broken hearted you are, i am the same and Jesus wept so i will weep has often has i like for as long has i like, please give yourself permission to do that, but please live your life, i wrote in my jouranl my daughter wouldnt want me to greive forever and just exist, she would tell me off and get cross, so i know some days i will do good in that and other not so good, but again that is ok, lets lean on Jesus he is our best friend and he is holding our children too, and He weeps with us too, i do hope this bings you some comfort from one grieving mum to another xxx
So sorry for your loss, i am a Christian also & lost my son 15months ago. My faith is getting me thru but it is so hard & Painful. I to would love my son back, but not to see him suffer the way he did❤
I lost my daughter 6 months ago and my grandson is in a foster home. Because he became violent with me. I love. Them both with my whole heart and miss them dearly
Having lost my husband two years ago, I am becoming more isolated and home bound and find it difficult to relate to others and avoid certain situations that cause me pain. Holidays are especially painful, but I have found a way to cope by considering them just another day that will be over tomorrow. I am experiencing all of the physical systems mentioned here. My best coping mechanism is counting my blessings every day, which are many.
I lost my 33 year old beautiful son to suicide 6 months ago. The trauma and loss has been overwhelming. Also to help my siblings and be strong for them is a needed prayer. Thanks for your video.
I’m so sorry 😢 It’s so painful to lose children. Sending you much compassion and healing ❤️🩹
I find the teachings & especially experience, similar to yours, at Helping Parents Heal, is a major lifeboat in the grief ocean that can crash waves over one's head. I'm now finding grief to be a jewel or a divine enzyme that has alchemized my old life into a newly growing one with no room for stupid stuff! 🌲⛺️🦋
I am so sorry for the horrible loss of your beloved son. My daughter died 7 mos. ago. I’m in hell. Sending you much love.
Suicide is the most complicated horrible grieving a person can experience. I loss my partner of 18 yrs. through suicide ….. the what of’s could of’s should of’s haunt me beyond words. My faith in God is slowly being restored caused I blamed Him for not intervening and of course I blamed myself and I was & might sound weird so embarrassed with my family members and close friends. I felt like I caused his death and everybody kinda thought the same thing….. I will be praying for you Denise Caldwell, your story touched my soul.
@@terrigreen100 I know exactly how you feel, my other half took his own life an I'm only just starting to live my life again six years later. I felt my life was over an not worth living an I wanted to end it so I could be with my partner but I just couldn't put my family through the same pain I was feeling. Time does help eventually, he may be gone but we will be together again one day in the future. Sending you love and hugs 😊❤️
After losing my first-born son, who was also my best friend, I knew immediately that there was indeed no going back to normal. Two years have passed, and I am more convinced than ever that this is true.
2 yrs since my son aged 32 died of brain cancer. I miss him every day.
Seven months in to losing my son to cancer he was forty nine I miss him so much my heart as been broken in to small pieces I just can’t function any more and just don’t want to be in this world anymore it is the worst pain I have ever known it is constant torment
Jk
He was also my best friend
I have just lost my son in a car accident. Going through so much grief
So sorry ❤
I'm sorry prayers for you ❤
❤ sending you love
Thank you for your words, i lost my beloved husband of 30 years last November, i used to be so so happy, in love, strong, now i dont recognise myself, i am so unhappy, find it difficult to talk to people, i prefer to be alone with my dogs, i guess it is still early days, what i have trouble with is knowing that i will never be that happy again, i am grateful tho for the wonderful years we had together. x
I’m so sorry for your loss and wishing you all the best and peace ☮️ in your life.
Sending a hug from me to you 🫂❤️🩹🦋
You are not alone ! Me too!
My life will never be the same without my husband. The hardest for me are the holidays. I can’t find myself to decorate anymore or look forward to xmas:( . It’s very hard to live alone……
I lost my firstborn to glioblastoma 9 years ago, 41 yr old precious daughter, then…on July 4th, this year, the day before my 72nd bday, I lost my youngest, 36 yr old darling son, suddenly. Our hearts are shattered! I do trust the Lord, am not angry with Him(even though I do not understand), He is my only source of comfort, hope, and blessed assurance. It remains to be seen what our last years will be like. I pray I am the kind of woman God wants me to be in facing all of this. I pray fervently for our remaining son, also, but, we know our lives are in His hands, always have been. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord. One important thing I learned from dealing with the loss of my daughter is not to expect from others what only God can give you. People mean well, but many times say inappropriate things, avoid speaking of your child, or just leave you alone in your grief. They don’t know what to do or say. But…neither do we. 💔 It can be a very isolating path. The Lord was with us, though, during that time, and I know He is with us now, and will see us through. My heart and prayers go out to all parents experiencing this agonizing loss ❤️🙏❤️
There's been a lot of loss in the family over the past six years. The one that changed my life in so many ways was my dad. It was sudden, out of the blue, and what hurts the most was that I was gonna call him the same morning I found out. He would always ask me why is it that he was the last to know about everything. I knew how it felt that day because I was the last to find out that he died. My childhood, hopes, and dreams all sort of died the day of his funeral. It killed me overtime.
I got pregnant shortly after he passed away. I needed meaning in my life and a reason to go on. My daughter has kept me going. My man has kept me going too.
I don't think I'll ever be the same again. I still cling to my phone, even five years later, in the fear of getting news about someone else passing away. I never really had anxiety until my father died.
I also feel guilty for not talking to him about how he felt when he lost his mom. He was crushed but I was too young to understand and be there to comfort him. It changed him too but he lost her when he was older. I lost him when I was 25.
It just sucks.
Everything around me has changed due to the loss of my husband to Covid, my experience with Covid, and how my work and our culture has changed. I am different in many unrecognizable ways.
The hurt inside I can't describe....
After 50 yrs..
My husband died. 2.5yrs ago
I found it easier just to take one day at a time.
Today is ready cash use it. Tomorrow is only promissory.
Yesterday is cancelled. That's my mantra.
Joan Hopkins.
I'm crazy, crazy, sleep also,alot,cry.I go to bed and look to see if my husband is in bed. He died 10 mo ago.I talk to him ,tell him all that is happening in the family.I will never get over his loss.
I lost my mum last June and was utterly unprepared for the ravaging effects of grief. I have memory loss, periods of intense sadness, feeling so alone and feel changed beyond recognition. I don’t like this version of me and am fragile and tearful. I can only think of the devastating things my beloved mum went through whilst trying to futilely battle lung and brain cancer. I suffer from PTSD of those awful last months. I often feel irritated and have no patience for anything at all. I have lost all motivation to cook, clean, decorate etc. I cannot bear the thought of all those spring jobs waiting for me to do outside and I can’t bear the changing of the seasons. It’s a terrible thing to feel so changed and weakened. I get annoyed a5 family members who simply want me to get on with life. I think I’ve done a great job of going back to work only a month after mum died and I am functioning as a high school teacher, which I’ve done for 30 years now. I feel like I am simply waiting for something to happen to make it different. As yet, I’m still broken and mum would be devastated for me.
She will want you to be happy and that you were a great daughter .
🙏🏼☮️💟❤️❤️
I have lost several loved ones, but often a living sorrow can be worse. In my opinion.
I’ve been trying to figure out what is this feeling I’m experiencing but can’t put it into words and since I can’t put it into words I don’t know how to talk about it. Everything in this video I am experiencing, thank you for being a voice for the for people who can’t even explain with words
☹️That’s so touching and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all loss our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but death is just inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday, and every of our love ones we’ve loss will want to see us happy wherever they’re. Hope you’ve found peace, comfort and happiness again Carla?
It’s okay that you can’t find the words ,you are feeling the journey. I so hope you have someone to talk with . To me presently is so very much about being validated. Not that I want some dramatic attention , absolutely not ,but I need to talk about my loss ,maybe over and over again and with out judgment. Just because I appear to be doing fine , it would mean so much you don’t try to fix me , be uncomfortable by my grief , just recognize I hurt . Why are ppl so afraid to acknowledge grief?
I lost my brother in August of 2022 to a fentanyl overdose. He was 33 years old. Since that day, I’ve had a knot in my stomach and an empty feeling in my chest that’s never gone away.
I lost my husband to a drunk driver almost 9 months ago. I was drowning in grief for 4 months. I had been so much better with my depression and anxiety when my husband was taken from me. The self-harm tendencies did come out, but it didn't help (redirect the pain) so no matter how much I want to, I'm not doing that anymore. My life definitely has a before and after to it. I've lost 30 pounds. I eat sporadically if at all. I literally go to work, come home, play on the computer, go to bed, and repeat the process over and over. Life feels absolutely pointless and the only reason I haven't ended it is because I don't have the courage. I know he wants me to keep going and believe me, it's a surprise every day that I'm still here. While I'm doing a lot better, there are still days when the realization that he's not coming home really hits me and I just lose it. Sometimes that happens at work, sometimes in the car, sometimes at home. I hate it so much. I will always love him and I will always miss him.
Wonderful video. A friend compared grief to making a new quilt from the pieces of your life before the loss. Designing and sewing the quilt takes time and effort. Some parts of your former life stay in a new form, others parts are released. Years after the loss you look back and see the parts clearer. Love yourself and be patient with the journey.
This is a really lovely visual. Thanks Judith.❤
Hi Judith, how’s your day going with you?
I've been coping with a particularly challenging death of my husband and have only recently found Jo's wonderful supportive videos. Thank you so much Jo.. However the mention of a quilt has really resonated, I've been a quilter all my life so this could not be more appropriate. Thanks. Ps I'm using my husbands tablet so his name will pop up, must get one of the children to help me change it. Best wishes Sara.
Thank you for Helping me
My wife died 6/1/2021. I found I hated being alone, eating alone, going to bed and getting up-alone. I don't like going places alone , being there or going home alone. I had always known her... I have a picture of us in a church class at six years old. She was ALWAYS in and around my life. If I died yesterday it would be fine. I'm just over with the living . If I die in the near future, it will be fine. I have a friend that I talk with often. She is the only feeling of still being alive I have.
Lost my beautiful wife Elise of 25 years 5 weeks ago; 17 days after being diagnosed with stage 4 lymphoma. This has been the worse days of my life and never imagined I would be talking about this. Everything is empty and silent. There is this depressive heavy quiet energy every where I look. It’s been actually getting worse now that things have somewhat calmed down and I have time to think and reflect. I have lost 15lbs and I have night sweats. I have prayed constantly for strength to get through each and every day and that she is in heaven.
Please hold on to the anchor of God!🙏🏼 He is with us in our pain1000% I’m very sorry for your loss, it seems unending. I
Will say a prayer for you.🙏🏼🤍🙌
Your beautiful wife is in heaven. If you don't already, pop along to your local church. It will be a wonderful strength for you. Of that I can promise. You don't have to be a Christian to go along to church. Just enjoy it, for what it is, uplifting services, wonderful company. Nice cuppa!!! My church family are wonderful, as are my own. Bless you 🙏 ♥
It does change you you even have to find yourself.
When I lost my son, I was devastated to the point that I was living in a void for years and years. 20 years on. Still struggling but so be it.
Yes Joy, my daughter died unexpectedly, motorcycle accident. I will never be the same, I miss her and I miss me. I’m 65 and I hope I don’t have to carry this for too long.
I lost my son 13 years ago. The pain will be raw forever. You are not alone ❤️
I knew in my gut when my beloved's memory started failing, that dementia was coming for him, as it did for both our dads. Our couple life ended soon after that.That was seven long years ago. He's been gone a year and a half now. And I knew our "normal" was gone forever. We were only together 13 years, married seven. During our last five years I morphed from lover to wife to personal assistant to warden to nurse. He was the best thing that ever happened to me, other than my children. I figure our relatively short time together (met at 52) is why I don't dream of him. Or maybe the caregiving as he evaporated took it all out of me. I try to talk to him but I know he's not there. The best moments are talking to his siblings when we swap stories. That brings him back a little. I'm in three support groups and wrote a book about it all. I'm grateful to share a home with my brother, but I feel absolutely alone.
3years ago my son was killed very suddenly in an ATV accident. My immense grief over the loss of my youngest, 37 year old child, was compounded by the sad truth that he had been angry with me when he died. Yes, it would have soon been made up...but my intense guilt over the last words that we said to each other have me frozen in time. I still struggle daily not only with grief...but intense feelings of guilt as well. I was going to call him that day and tell him that I loved him...but never got the chance. I worry that his last days were emotionally uncomfortable, since our usual easy relationship had been disrupted. I carry this around like a stone in my ♥ heart every minute of every day. I am trying to work through these negative feelings. But as of yet have not found a way. I am old. My health has declined. I don't want to die feeling this way.
Oh Nancy, you do know your son loves you greatly, & forever. Feel that love coming from him no matter where he is and know it's only forgiving yourself you need to do. You will always suffer the pain of separation while you live. Don't agonize over his anger at the time of his death. Do you really think he would still prioritize that, at this point? It's in the past. All there is between the two of you now is love. Let that be so, and don't hurt yourself any more by dwelling on that. Would he want that for you? Love your son and forgive yourself.
I took care of my dad for 10 years before he died. He was bedridden and required full body care 24/7. It was exhausting, demanding, stinky, messy, laborious, never-ending. I adored Dad before almost anyone in the world, having a tough childhood where I lost my mother, had to be on my own, and he worked away from home so I didn't get to see him sometimes for 1.5 years. So I treasured him all my life. I certainly sacrificed more for him than I ever did for anyone. Things were so grim in the last 6 months when he was completely helpless. Then later he quit eating, and me taking care of him at home, I knew he wouldn't last more than a few weeks; he was dropping weight & weakening. Starving but not caring. It really seemed like time stood still & we'd been alone in that house like that, together forever.
I had an attack of self pity on the kitchen island one morning, and wept. I was beyond tired. Trying to be cheerful for Dad, but always alone with the grief & the fear and the dread and the work... I know that my Dad heard me cry and ask myself, "how long can this go on?" because he shot himself that afternoon. Of course this sent me straight into hell. I know my dad, and that he was trying to spare me. But it absolutely sent me straight to hell.
It's been 5 1/2 years. I can own now what I said in misery, that caused Dad to do that. I know how much I love him & he loved me. I know now that a daughter that will dement herself & run herself into the ground to care for a father - and a father who will literally kill himself to spare his daughter unhappiness, is the depth of our love for each other. Not exactly story-book. But I know who I am, & I love my Dad & he loves me.
Please think about the burden of guilt that you're carrying, & if it's proportionate. Remind yourself that he doesn't want you to be always unhappy, especially over him. Go blow some money on something beautiful or extravagant & take him with you when you pick it out. Move on and keep him with you.
I lost a father not a son, and know it cannot be compared. But I do care, and wish you peace Nancy.
Laura.
@@hensonlaura oh Laira...thank you for your beautiful, comforting words!! Sending hugs and love to you.
My daughter was killed by a hit and run driver a month ago. The driver will probably get away with it.
She was 29 . I cannot stop crying.
Sending you healing and love.
Nancy I’m so sorry my heart hurts for you 😢I lost a parent I wasn’t on good terms with ..guilt I had I came to realize the negative times didn’t out way all the positive loving times ❤ is so powerful may you find peace and comfort in your loving happy memories
I pray for you ,to have your heavy guilt lifted. Your son is in heaven, he has forgiven , and God has forgiven, we are only human and every one has words, that's normal family life. I can relate to your guilt and grief, letting that guilt go is hard, but with lots of prayer 🙏 it will diminish. Talk to a one to one support worker regularly, and family and friends, your church family. Anyone who will listen! And they will. Never a truer saying than 'a problem shared is a problem halved' I 🙏 🤲 🕍 for you ❤
Just losing my oldest daughter, and son within two months apart, has made me look into the mirror at myself, and the walk I have with my Lord God and Savior Jesus Christ. I keep my eyes on Jesus, not looking to the left, or right, and I keep running the good race, and fighting the good fight to do the Will, Way, and Purpose of the Father God in Heaven. Praise Jesus Lord God and Savior AMEN.
I miss my old life, i miss my husband.I don’t believe time heals all wounds.Thank you for your videos. I have a new life now but I can’t let go of the old life i had with my husband. It is hard
Oh my goodness yes. I lost my father, him being the only person who really understood my heart. I feel like i just started to take life head on being that i lost him at 23. I wish i had that drive and resilience for live again. I miss my daddy. A lot.
I'm halfway through my second year of losing my husband. I know who I was and together we balanced each other. Now I'm free floating. Now clue who I am now. I have all the physical things you mentioned. Also a few months after his death, I now have overactive bladder that makes it hard for me to go out-tidal wave at the worst times.
Just discovered your channel. My husband died July 18, 2022. I took him to hospital July 8 to hospital for another kidney infection, 3 days layer into Hospice to die a horrible painful death to kidney failure, he was 75. Everything you talk about in this video is so correct. I worried before he died I would get sick from stress and now this grief. I started grief therapy in my community right away and doing what I can to rest and exercise more.
In regards to wishing for things to go back to normal, at times I wish that my husband we just come back for a little while to tell me I am doing okay and I can get through my loss.
We lost our son suddenly 4 years ago, 10 months later my mum, 8 months later hubby’s brother and then months later our brother in law…. I acknowledge so much of what you said… I already had an immune disorder and can ‘feel’ the inflammation on a daily basis. I might seem normal on the outside but am 10 kg heavier and just don’t know where to find myself anymore. Our other 3 children seem so buried in their grief of losing their sibling it feels like I lost all my children that day….no one can comprehend the pain - I appreciate and am grateful for each day I have life… it’s just not easy
I feel my heart pounding and racing all the time and Im not bothered at all if it does cause damage. The shorter the time I have to live without him the better.
It wears on us, but thousands of thousands of years of grief of our ancestors and their losses. I've found through losses and grief, remembering our ancestors and most everyone around us, has experienced grief.
But yes...grief is real, it affects us.
Life is so hard and different without my son and only child and I don’t know what is to come. I’m only surviving one day at a time. Not certain who I am today. 💔💔
I am so sorry Myrna for your loss. I can't imagine. Wish I could make it go away for you.
It's changed my outlook. I feel more vulnerable. I drink a lot more than I ought to. I don't think there is a normal once your heart has been drained.
I buried my daughter Friday, she was 32 years old, I'm trying to stay strong, it's so hard🥺💔💔🌹🌹
Bless You, so sorry ❤
@@priscilladevi9705 Thank you 💙
So sorry.....
@@elsaarauz2188 💙
❤❤❤
You never go back to normal. I don’t see how one can. Normal is what we think of with our loved ones present. I lost my 12,15 and 17 year olds on 3.29.19. I am a momma of 6 and lost half my brood in the blink of an eye. So I hung in to wanting normal for maybe the first 3 ish years. I now understand I have to make my new normal. I experienced every thing mentioned. At a little over 4 years I eat better sleep better. I am running again. Trying to push on. Just one day at a time. I have not been to a physician since the accident so I can only imagine what my blood work looks like. My heart goes out to all you parents who had to experience the loss of your children. Hugs to you. ❤️
I got that awful call we all dread telling me my beautiful precious brother passed suddenly. I absolutely adored him and it’s killing me I never got to say goodbye. My heart aches and it’s completely broken!
Thank you, 6 months in to my grief, Jo you have been a great blessing. I have searched out right away how to get to “better” after my darling husband passed . So when I found you ,I didn’t want to hear anybody, but your kindness and truth spoke to me and I look forward to seeing you teach and reach out to the hurting
I lost my husband of 50 years. A year later I lost my son, who died suddenly. My son kept it together for me when I lost my husband. Now, despite I have terminal cancer, no one knows why I can't move on. I don't live anymore, I exist. I am gone and who I was no longer exist. It hurts so bad that I am unable to see the world anymore. I died as well. I have nothing left but hospital visits and cemetary visits. I hate God and just life. And therapy doesn't work. Dr. Is angry I won't agree with his sophmoric cliches. I was happy, a good person to all, a homemaker, a criminal defense attorney who advocated for all the damaged people so "what the hell was God thinking"???? I can NEVER be happy or secure emotionally again. I am not reconciling the loss of my family. I ache for them. The silence is defening. Rob's mom and Eddie's wife for eternity.
I lost both parents quite suddenly at the age of 19 over 40 years ago. No close family for support and the days before counselling. Many of the factors mentioned in this video still remain. It affects more lives than my own and something my partner has felt the effects of. Thank goodness we live in these videos and counseling are available for help and reassurance for anyone affected by grief. Thanks for videos.
Grief has been a long process that really has no end in sight. It is a transition yet the pain of the loss is still w/me. It’s difficult to see ahead. 😢
No end in sight, yes, nor for me, that's the bottomline right now. Sending virtual support 🙏
Stumbled across this video. I’m into my 4th year without my beloved husband and finally approaching the point of achieving acceptance. Acceptance of so much more than the loss of my best friend, realising the enormity of what has been lost has been staggering. We grieve so much more than the person, the world forever changed. Those 2 questions are now where I’m at. Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Sue 🙏🏻
I lost my mother 2 days ago so am only beginning the grief process. I moved in to care for her 18 years ago(dementia/alzheimers). Most everyone tells me"now you can have a life". She was my life. I know it will take time..a kind of slow unraveling
My mom passed away 5 days ago, after caring for her, for almost 10 years. You hit the nail on the head. I feel like this, as well. I hope it gets better. I feel so empty.
Why do ppl use such coined phrases “ now you can have a life “ you must so miss her ..acknowledge the loss ..it drives me batty how ppl use all these phases . I remember when my Aunt lost her 52 yr only son ..her priest God wanted him “ my aunt “ but I wanted him “ Priest “ but God needed him more “ I find it miraculous that anyone could believe in God after listening to this crap.
Lost my mom Oct 20th 2022, on my 60th birthday, I feel for you and I'm so sorry and I'm with you
I can't stand people with their so called "advise". I was asked to think what my mother and father would want me to feel. That is a very unfair request as we were very close up to the end
I so relate to your post & all you who replied. I cared for both of mine, & became quite ill, & ended up putting Mama in a memory care place right before covid shutdown. I couldn't get in to see & reassure her. Worst decision in my life. It destroyed her. Which destroys me. I am praying to be transformed & useful to earth, wildlife & people, till i get to go see her again & re-do her last months from separated wreckage to joyful reunion. Bless each of you, in this very painful pilgrimage that is transforming us.
Been 4 months since cancer stole my beautiful bride.
High school sweet hearts, married 33 years snd loved each other so much that I know it made God happy.
I understand things will never be the same but just like the Fleetwood mac song says “ Don’t stop thinking about tomorrow…don’t stop it’ll soon be here….it’ll be here better than today…..yesterday’s gone….yesterday’s gone.
I hope to find another special woman to love again as I know my wife insisted that I do that numerous times before she passed.
She was so worried about me being alone and as always she was thinking ten steps ahead and boy was she right again….the loneliness really sucks but I got my doggo’s and my hobbies, my projects, my business and 12 grandkids to keep me busy at age 53.
Very good questions and I’m a new widow of 19 days ….. so so hard
nine days today. it seems surreal. either crying or numb . I hope you are ok . This pain is intense.
I have been greiving my mother for several years(dementia has slowly taken her away) Now she has passed recently, I am at times numb, sad , relieved, and sad . In time I will accept my loss and move forward in the world I live. But nothing will be the same. Iam now at the top of the tree, there is no one before me anymore- I’m it! The top branch of the tree, it feels like yesterday I was the little branch at the bottom of the tree. I will forever be different to that little branch I was…..this is what it is to be human and growing .
I recently loss my best friend. The last time I was stricken with this much grief was 2006...when I lost my niece. Thank God for videos like this one and many others on RUclips...to help us get through grieving.
So many heart wrenching stories. Loss, suffering and pain. Also going through my own. I am empty. Just going through the motions. Grief truly is messy.
My heart is so sad for everyone who have shared their story.❤😮
💔❤️🩹
Wow! How poignant that this video came up on my feed today. My dearest friend lost her beloved husband this morning. This video helped me ..as a friend..to help her..thank you.❤
My heart is so hurting for her tonight knowing she is in bed alone..heartbroken..
I lost my ability to ambulate , walk any more. I think my grief made me reall y give on life...
Experiencing the extreme grief I am at present has profoundly changed me, especially as this was someone entirely reliant, loving and trusting toward me. Someone who went through their whole life never hurting me as mankind invariably does, showing me what it means to make sacrifices, how to be caring, patient and tolerant.
At first I began to write down my thoughts, describing emotions, talking to the missing loved one through words, weeping profusely, feeling remorse for the many mistakes I made. That helped, it also told me I needed help, and not to ashamed asking for it.
My advice is to grab all the trusted help you can, professional or otherwise, to ease the sense of loss and withdrawal. Give yourself time, but also remember it's finally up to you to come through it all, to start to live and find happiness again. The loved one who left you to live without them would want and expect that.
I found your words useful and hopeful, so thank you Jo.
I just lost my mom at 2:30 a.m. this morning to Cancer and heart failure. I took care of her until she moved in to town and closer to the Hospital and my dad(her ex husband) agreed to move in to be closer and help her and us.
Rain, Snow -50below I was coming home to take care of my mom. so, I didn't regret that time spent. love you mom...your the best in the world! I always wished I was more like you! ❤❤❤
I have Broken Heart Syndrome. So much grief...
Something is broken inside us,we are no longer the same. I lost my dad in Dec 2023. I miss him so much.😢😢😢
Grief just doesn't come with death.
Grief is the same n worse with separation from your spouse.
It even has the extra emotions of rejection n betrayal. The person is still around but, with someone else.
There are no words to describe that pain but, that aspect of Grief is never mentioned it's only acknowledged with the death of your partner.
i lost my second husband a year and a half ago, 10 years early I lost my first husband. But this time my entire life changed. my memory, decision making all changed for the worst..
Every loss of a loved one including pets takes a another part of my heart. What does help me is that I believe in re incarnation. A dear friend of mine lost 3 young children in a car accident. Some time later they had two more children. He confided in me that he had 2 of his children back and that they were now asking for their toys by name which had been packed away in box’s. So wonderfull. I have many other confirmations that we just leave our body and can take on another one.
I lost my precious son 15months ago, he had an incurable Disease and it was very Traumatic watching him suffer. A week before he passed i fell and fractured 3 bones in my ankle which left me in a wheelchair. For me it was a very Traumatic time.
Then his funeral & a few months later moving to another country. It has had a tremendous impact on my life, as i had left all my support system behind.
Definately changed who i am today. Left with a hole in my heart.😢
My identity and purpose has been sucked out of me. Knowing this is has no end date is the hardest to accept. My 21 yr old son was killed April 9/20 and that matter is currently in court. My father passed from illness this past May.
I want this to be over.
Curiously, i have had a few continuing swelling issues unexplained by doctors. I often wondered if it was connected.
At the earliest stages I did feel drawn to others but that has reversed and I only feel safe alone.
I'm so sick of being called strong and resilient.
Thank you for this video. I am thankful I was sent this video by a close friend. I lost my 34 year old son a month ago to leukemia and I am completely devastated. Every thought you mentioned is exactly what I'm feeling. This is hard
I lost my only daughter 10 yrs ago and I don't know how to move on.She was 25 yrs old.I think of her all the time.She was my joy, I don't know what to do.
My heart goes out to you. I also lost my 35-year-old daughter last year. It will be different things. You can do very good thing by putting your feelings in writing . She is ok with a special mom like you. Be well.
I lost so many friends in my young days then lost my only brother when I was 27 , then my dad along with 4 grandparents before dad then my eldest son which has torn me apart, I got so sick here I am nearly 9 yrs later now with so many medical issues I never had before, the Drs told me I had complicated grief and my body was shutting down, my son was my everything we were super close, things change to life before it happened to life after it will never be the same, you become a member of a club called the mothers who lost a child which you never ever wished you belonged to, you become numb to things, then you become super sensitive to other things that didn’t bother you much before, I closed myself off to the world didn’t want to be a part of any of it again, all I wanted to do was die with him, slowly I think I am. I just hold on to I know I will see them all again one day when it’s my time and go back home. Nothing in this world matters but love and when you loose it all your ppl it’s so hard to continue to walk alone.