I remember watching your videos back in the day and couldn't find your channel again for years. Happy to see you're good. There's so little male ace representation, I'm happy you put out the video. Male and female ace experiences are quite different
I remember when you uploaded that video- made me realize I wasn't alone- made me feel like I belonged :) Edit: I was there when you uploaded it. Can't believe it's been 10 Years!
Great to hear from you, Alex, and cool to hear the condensed version of the whole timeline (so far!). It’s awesome that your willingness to share about your asexual experience has been the catalyst for such community, healing, and friendship! It’s incredible what camaraderie can do for a person’s motivation, self esteem, etc etc! Reminds me of one of the messages from a book series I just finished :) everyone matters and can make an impact, so just think how many people flourish as a butterfly effect of you just being you and holding space for us to be ourselves too! Hope the year improves from here :)
Thanks for watching and for the detailed comment as always Paula. I've appreciated your kind words of support over the years and here is no different. Hope this year is treating you well
Hi! I’m on the aroace spectrum (I think I’m aego? Still working on it lol), and I love this video so much. It’s amazing how the choices we make can change our lives so much. I’ve never seen your content before but it’s very sweet and heartfelt 💜 maybe sometime you could do a video about when people say you’re lucky to be ace? I’ve gotten it from a few of my friends lately and it’s hard to respond because they’re usually saying it because they’re coming from a bad breakup or struggle with short term relationships and such, so I never really want to correct them that no, being ace isn’t the answer to all their prayers, but also I feel bad lmao. Just subscribed, I hope to see more! 💜
Hi Raeanna, thanks for the kind words and welcome! I think that's a really good point. There are often quite a few comments from people on older videos of mine saying how lucky I am to be ace and how they wish they were too. It's always interested me and, I think you're right, it's often at a time where the physical side of the relationship becomes a problem. Thanks for subscribing!
Growing up, I thought I was gay and it always felt like a shirt that was not the right fit for my frame. It was late in my adult life when I started wondering ... some of my own self-reflections are very opposite of the gay experience, maybe I'm not gay - but if not, what? Your videos helped me settle into a shirt that felt like the *perfect* fit, and learn all the ways people wear it! I'm sorry I haven't said it before: THANK YOU!
I think you are perhaps a bit confused. If you feel attraction towards the opposite sex, you are heterosexual. Sexual attraction is not just the desire for sexual intercourse, but encompasses attitudes like love and affection. One of the errors of modern society is the decoupling of the sexual act from romance and love. So we now believe you can routinely have sex and experience no love and romance, or only experience love and romance, whilst having no sex. Although both may be true, it is extremely rare and not a normal and healthy expression of sexuality. Some heterosexual people don’t have a high desire for sexual intercourse, or only have a desire for sexual intercourse if it’s combined or resulting from romance and love. This is very normal and describes almost all heterosexual people at some point in time. If you have no desire for sexual intercourse and only desire romance and love from another human being then there could be two reasons - you may have an underlying psychological condition (e.g. autism, OCD, anxiety) or physical condition (e.g. impotence) that can be corrected, or you may instead be called to celibacy and might find a better home in religious life or secular life where there is no commitment to any relationship (singlehood). Celibacy is an entirely normal expression of the human condition (albeit rare). Asexuality is a term that’s often erroneously used to describe people. If persons are seeking romantic relationships with no intention for sexual intercourse, then they are misusing their sexual expression. If persons are masturbating, then they have natural sexual desire that isn’t being fulfilled properly (i.e. with another person). Asexual is often used as a term to paper over issues with sexual expression that people feel nervous or anxious about, including celibacy. Some women use the term asexual in particular to cover over severe anxiety about sexual expression, say anxiety about being bullied or pressured into sex by men. Don’t hide from your sexual expression using terms like asexual. Be more bold to explore whether or not relationships are for you, and if so, how you can learn to more healthily expression love and sexual intercourse together.
I remember watching your videos back in the day and couldn't find your channel again for years. Happy to see you're good. There's so little male ace representation, I'm happy you put out the video. Male and female ace experiences are quite different
I remember when you uploaded that video- made me realize I wasn't alone- made me feel like I belonged :)
Edit: I was there when you uploaded it. Can't believe it's been 10 Years!
Pleased that you're still sticking around Zonair. Happy to have got to know you over these years
Great to hear from you, Alex, and cool to hear the condensed version of the whole timeline (so far!). It’s awesome that your willingness to share about your asexual experience has been the catalyst for such community, healing, and friendship! It’s incredible what camaraderie can do for a person’s motivation, self esteem, etc etc! Reminds me of one of the messages from a book series I just finished :) everyone matters and can make an impact, so just think how many people flourish as a butterfly effect of you just being you and holding space for us to be ourselves too!
Hope the year improves from here :)
Thanks for watching and for the detailed comment as always Paula. I've appreciated your kind words of support over the years and here is no different. Hope this year is treating you well
Hi! I’m on the aroace spectrum (I think I’m aego? Still working on it lol), and I love this video so much. It’s amazing how the choices we make can change our lives so much. I’ve never seen your content before but it’s very sweet and heartfelt 💜 maybe sometime you could do a video about when people say you’re lucky to be ace? I’ve gotten it from a few of my friends lately and it’s hard to respond because they’re usually saying it because they’re coming from a bad breakup or struggle with short term relationships and such, so I never really want to correct them that no, being ace isn’t the answer to all their prayers, but also I feel bad lmao. Just subscribed, I hope to see more! 💜
Hi Raeanna, thanks for the kind words and welcome! I think that's a really good point. There are often quite a few comments from people on older videos of mine saying how lucky I am to be ace and how they wish they were too. It's always interested me and, I think you're right, it's often at a time where the physical side of the relationship becomes a problem. Thanks for subscribing!
Growing up, I thought I was gay and it always felt like a shirt that was not the right fit for my frame. It was late in my adult life when I started wondering ... some of my own self-reflections are very opposite of the gay experience, maybe I'm not gay - but if not, what? Your videos helped me settle into a shirt that felt like the *perfect* fit, and learn all the ways people wear it! I'm sorry I haven't said it before: THANK YOU!
Great analogy there. I'm really glad you found the shirt with a perfect fit. Never be afraid to wear it out and show it off, it looks great on you!
Wow, I can’t believe it’s been 9 years since 2015. I feel like I just watched that video yesterday
I actually really hate how much time flies. Despite my immaturity, I would be go back to my 19 year old self in a heartbeat
You look like you are in a happier place
Thanks Lesedi!
I've been around since the early days, having similar growth myself. I'd love to meet up if you come to the states man.
I remember you since from the beginning. You used to comment on a lot of my first videos! Thanks for sticking around
I think you are perhaps a bit confused. If you feel attraction towards the opposite sex, you are heterosexual. Sexual attraction is not just the desire for sexual intercourse, but encompasses attitudes like love and affection. One of the errors of modern society is the decoupling of the sexual act from romance and love. So we now believe you can routinely have sex and experience no love and romance, or only experience love and romance, whilst having no sex. Although both may be true, it is extremely rare and not a normal and healthy expression of sexuality.
Some heterosexual people don’t have a high desire for sexual intercourse, or only have a desire for sexual intercourse if it’s combined or resulting from romance and love. This is very normal and describes almost all heterosexual people at some point in time.
If you have no desire for sexual intercourse and only desire romance and love from another human being then there could be two reasons - you may have an underlying psychological condition (e.g. autism, OCD, anxiety) or physical condition (e.g. impotence) that can be corrected, or you may instead be called to celibacy and might find a better home in religious life or secular life where there is no commitment to any relationship (singlehood). Celibacy is an entirely normal expression of the human condition (albeit rare).
Asexuality is a term that’s often erroneously used to describe people. If persons are seeking romantic relationships with no intention for sexual intercourse, then they are misusing their sexual expression. If persons are masturbating, then they have natural sexual desire that isn’t being fulfilled properly (i.e. with another person). Asexual is often used as a term to paper over issues with sexual expression that people feel nervous or anxious about, including celibacy. Some women use the term asexual in particular to cover over severe anxiety about sexual expression, say anxiety about being bullied or pressured into sex by men.
Don’t hide from your sexual expression using terms like asexual. Be more bold to explore whether or not relationships are for you, and if so, how you can learn to more healthily expression love and sexual intercourse together.