Love Is Blind's Clay Gravesande & Mom Margarita: The Untold Story | Dear Future Wifey Ep 812
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 24 мар 2024
- EXCLUSIVE: Love Is Blind's CLAY GRAVESANDE and His Mom MARGARITA Tells All | Dear Future Wifey Podcast Episode 812
The most controversial episode in the history of Netflix's Love Is Blind, has set the stage to have conversations around how childhood trauma can impede decisions on marriage. Clay Gravesande, joined by his mom, Margarita Gravesande, share the yellow couch as we unpack the decision Clay made that upset the world. Should he have gone through with the marriage? Should he have ended the relationship earlier? This episode encourages you to choose the side of healing... "Please Heal, Black Man."
CONNECT WITH OUR GUEST
📸 Follow / clay_gravesande
📸 Follow / maggielendahand
REGISTER FOR THE BIG EVENT
www.identifindu.com
MAILING LIST
Stay updated with our latest episodes and events: bit.ly/LRWconnection 💌
THEME SONG
Purchase "YOU (Dear Future Wifey)" theme song on iTunes: itunes.apple.com/album/id/1729... 🎵
SUPPORT OUR CAUSE
Donate to Kingdom Royale: Empowering foster kids to become royalty: www.KingdomRoyale.com 👑
MERCH
Check out our Dear Future Wifey merch: www.DearFutureWifey.com 👕
SUBSCRIBE & LEAVE A REVIEW
RUclips Channel: / @dearfuturewifey
🍏 Apple Podcast: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
🎵 Google Play: play.google.com/music/m/Iae4c...
🧵 Stitcher: www.stitcher.com/podcast/dear...
🎧 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/1r3Ba1G...
FOLLOW US
📸 Instagram: / dearfuturewifeypodcast | / laterrasrwhitfield
📘 Facebook: / dearfuturewifey
🐦 Twitter: / dfwifeypodcast
Hashtags:
#loveisblind #marriage #lovestatus #LoveIsBlind #Marriage #LoveStatus #DearFutureWifey #ClayGravesande #MargaritaGravesande #ChildhoodTrauma #HealingJourney
Unpopular opinion: I commend Clay for knowing he wasn’t ready to fully (emotionally and mentally) commit to someone he’s known for 6-8wks…even if he waited til the alter. (The point of the show, which many has done before this season). We saw him struggled the whole time about seeing himself as a husband. He knew there was more work to be done within himself. His crown was shifted, it never fell off. Keep doing the work king!
I hope A.D. gets the chance to come on this show and speak.
Being married 23 years with your husband constantly cheating on you, is NOT something to be celebrated. Are these people ok?
Please do not compare this emotionally intelligent young MAN to Derrick Jackson. They are NOT the same. At all! ☺️ Thanks for having Clay on.💪🏾 🙏🏾 Proud of him.
God doesn't make any mistakes. His storyline was needed on Love Is Blind. Many people were able to see how your childhood can affect your relationships(romantic and platonic) as an adult. It also showed how women will ignore all the signs that say , "Do not marry him, He's not ready" just to be a wife. Thank you, Laterras, for bringing Clay and his mother on the show. His mother's conversation with his Dad was vital to understanding Clay. Parents have to eat humble pie and own up to our actions and apologize to our kids(grown or young) when we drop the ball. I commend Clay for letting her know he wasn't ready to marry her. I don't think she was mature enough to care for his heart and understand what was actually going through his head. People (the viewers)get caught up in the romantic side of the show and cast judgment without understanding. This season was a great learning experience for everyone who watched. I learned a lot about myself and what to look for in a future purpose partner.
Myself, and nearly all of my female friends are either in therapy, or have been before. None of us are perfect, but a lot more women seem to be doing the work to become healed and whole before pursuing romantic relationships. We’re not asking men to come to us perfect, or completely baggage free. We’re just asking you to start the work before you get to us, so you don’t harm us on your pathway to healing. You can’t keep raking us over the coals to keep yourself warm, and then asking us for grace afterwards.
In the 1st 7 minutes he admitted he didn’t have intentions of getting married. Knowing what the show entails, he should’ve decided not to be on the show. I think that’s everyone’s real issue with Clay. Nothing wrong with healing, identifying he’s not ready for marriage, or an emotionally intelligent man speaking his truth. But he bypassed things a lot of us feel that he already knew for an opportunity at fame, and at the cost of humiliation of another person.
Let’s be honest he did not take this serious. Netflix preyed upon him to force him to do the show for views bc he clearly said he was trying to get out of being on there and everyone watching seen through his mess and knew he did not like her enough to marry her. So him saying all this word salad is bologna. And this is from a married woman with great discernment. 😕
Clay was transparent thru the whole process. Let’s be honest if we were on the show half of us would be crucified for our actions.
3 weeks is not that long. I think it was very responsible for him not to jump into a marriage. He played the game and AD will be found by her husband eventually.
Key takeaways for me, "give yourself grace, and give others grace" and "disobedience to God can extend our time in the wilderness/darkness"
If we actively listen to this conversation without our judgement ears, we might learn a thing or two. Honestly, I watched the show, and I was confused with his decision but listening to him now on this podcast I feel like i understand him more. Laterras, I am proud of you for giving this King the space for him to be open and transparent throughout this interview and tell his story. This world is lacking in Grace, we are so quick to judge people without knowing everything. Great interview and I'm ready for Wednesday interview as well. This season has been LIT for real
Mama Gravesande is indeed the TRUTH and I can listen to her all day. She’s such a wealth of WISDOM! Laterras, thank you again for this wonderful interview and thank you for succumbing to The Holy Spirit for bringing Clayton on the show. There’s SO much to unpack from this interview and I would recommend anyone desiring to heal to watch this. Finally, we need to give ourselves and others, grace!
What about what AD needed from him? The conversation is continually about how she protected him, built him up, encouraged him etc. To me, she played the role of a second mother rather than a potential wife. And the conversation about maintaining her looks didn't sit well with me. Bodies change as we age and she deserves someone who loves her heart as well as her body no matter how she changes. The show is for people who are ready to get married. If he wasn't ready, why go on there.
As a person who has been scoped out and pursued to be casted on Love Is Blind, I can say that the casting directors BLATANTLY & clearly explain exactly how the process goes. So there’s no way any individual can have a skewed or unknown expectation of what the experiment is like. You ARE there to find marriage… With a total stranger… Within a VERY short time… I think that’s the issue people find with this situation, as to why it seems like he was playing games. And as a Mental Health Therapist who studies relationships, it is often the Black man (my one & only favorite type of man) struggles with looking like they’re playing games because they simply don’t gather the clear, direct facts. Yes, these “reality” shows are far from real… But EVERYONE watching the show knows the purpose of it, and to reiterate, as an individual pursued to be casted, we are explained very clearly, the process. Now, it is very true that we all have decisions , up until that very last day or very last second at the alter, BUT to know you’ve gone on a show that is at a SERIOUS level, and you , ya family, etc. KNEW it wasn’t that serious or high level of significance, THAT is where the issue lies. Don’t use a show that is meant to produce something serious, as a stepping stone to you healing yourself for relationships. Maybe… Use a dating app that doesn’t utilize photos, there are those. Lol utilize a therapist & healthy support system to help hold you accountable to meeting a woman and creating & sustaining a healthy emotional connection, since you’re trying to stray from leading with physical connections. Don’t utilize a show that’s on a certain level of KNOWN & UNDERSTOOD seriousness, when you were never even there, in the first place.
I honestly feel like there is a lot of truth in what Clay has disclosed to us. Although I don’t think he should’ve went on the show with all the reservations and issues he had because the show was about getting married within that quick timeline. I’m sure they went over that with him. He is not fully at fault here because AD chose to ignore a lot of red flags. I do feel whole heartedly that his purpose on the show was for the healing needed for his family. I loved the scene between his mom and dad. We needed to see something real like that on television. I hope they are all healing!
I can listen to his mother speak all day every day! Her voice, mannerism and words are so calm, encouraging and edifying! What a gift she was!
I think that it’s unfair that Clay has to be the “Poster Child” and profusely apologize for going to the alter to say that he was not ready for marriage. I feel like every platform that he’s on, I’m seeing him explain why… and apologize. There were people before him that was on the show that didn’t get nearly half as much backlash as he seems to have gotten. He had EVERY RIGHT to make the decision that was BEST FOR HIM!! I feel bad that AD got hurt but they BOTH signed up for this show and knew the consequences.
Thank you Laterras for stepping out in faith to do this episode! It was truly a blessing.
I really don’t understand how people say they want men to open up and tell their side but when their side is not palatable to some they immediately project negativity onto them. I still encourage Black men to be vulnerable but I understand why they have a hard time doing so. I pray people heal so they can stop placing their stuff onto everybody else.