"Yep, it's hacked alright" Okay this part made me laugh, because really, he already pointed out it was a hacked game, and then a bunch of weird things happened such as the Mewtwo's movements which I don't think would of looked that clear in Pokemon Fire Red due to the types of sprites, plus it following you and laughing like that? Dude, did you really need anymore confirmation than that to know it's hacked? x'D
Straight Jacket Studios Don't take it as a personal attack or anything, I tend to evaluate creepypastas when I listen to them. Heck I'm a writer myself and I've laughed at some of my own past attempts at making something scary and when it comes to pokepastas it's even harder because what might seem scary at first glance can end up seeming too unbelievable to have any actual scariness in it. Not sure if you'll read this post through completely but here's some tips that might help out with writing future pokepastas, which I hope you do. Excessive gore isn't scary or creepy. There's a time and place for it and using it too much can take away from it if it's important to the story. The game effecting something outside, such as characters jumping out of the game. It's unintentionally funny and is really hard to make work unless the game itself is cursed and possessed by something. It's just a bit too far from reality to be creepy. Avoid the pokemon being upset at the trainer for abandoning or not evolving them, it's been used so very often it's just a cliche at this point and isn't creepy in the least. Often story ideas might work better within the actual pokemon universe instead of just through a game, so really think about which scenario it would be best in. Obviously you don't have to worry so much about realism when focused on the actual pokemon world and not just someone playing a game. Avoid the cliche "He didn't faint, he died" it's been used so many times and it really isn't creepy. Be aware of the story's continuity, sometimes writers repeat something that already happened or have the character do something that they shouldn't be able to do because of something said previously. This can really mess with the story. Try to be original, too many people try to take aspects from other creepypastas and use them in an attempt to make something creepy. In the end it just becomes a shadow or sometimes a near exact copy of another creepypasta. Look at the world of pokemon, examine things in it such as a Pokedex entry or even a character, anything with mystery around it has the potential of becoming a good pokepasta. A good way of planning a pokepasta is to ask " What, why and how?" An example being...Surge was apparently in a war, what war was it, why did it even exist and why was he a soldier in the first place. Why is he one of the very few characters or possibly only one, that says anything about the war? And how did the war come to an end? Ask yourself these questions and then try to come up with answers that would make sense and also have a creepiness to them, from there you can turn it into a pokepasta. (Writing a summary to work off of helps too.) Writing isn't meant to be easy, we often stray from our original ideas, throw things away or completely start over. But if you have a basic idea, turning questions into guidelines, then you have the potential of making a very good story. Of course just answering the questions you create might not work out well, you could make a story and just work the answers in. It really helps the story of something is answered and can be thought about afterwards. If the readers think "That actually makes sense.." then you're doing something right. Anyway these are just some basic tips, you don't have to follow them but it could help you improve. I know they helped me improve with my writing. The important thing is to not take criticism as an attack and just take it as something to learn from. Oh and one more thing, proof read your story to make sure it makes sense and don't post it the same day you write it. Let it rest overnight then reread it to see if it's to your liking still. But all of that said, I hope to read or hear some more stories by you.
Thanks for the tips! I now make some good "Lost Episode" creepypastas. Still planning for a sequel though. But I was trying to do a Pokepasta similar to the creepypasta, "BEN DROWNED". But I'm not offended by your criticism, I'm actually pleased. Thank you! ;)
Haha that also made me laugh I kept on joking to myself about it! The way you said it was just mwa beautiful!!!! "Yep it's hacked alright" hahaha I should stop now
5:18 HEY THATS TF2 HEAVY QUOTE
THAT LINE WAS FROM SONIC.EXE WTF
I was just about to comment that!
Me too
5:15 I swear Heavy says that in TF2.
Possibly?
Oh, he also says a slightly changed line from Sonic.exe.
Thank you for reading my story! This is a dream come true (I was Psychopasta)! :'D
No problem! I was happy to read it!
I'm making a sequel to Burnt Red called, "Pokemon Burnt Red: HELLBOUND". So, get ready, cause it's coming in January 1st, 2018!
Anthony Tardungno It's supposed to be like Ben Drowned, but that's your opinion, I appreciate you sticking to it.
I remember reading ur story but forgot what was it about
Edit: NVM I saw the title :\
It's Ben Drowned pokeymanz edition!
This is the Pokemon version of Sonic.EXE
God bless Mewtwo I still love you no matter how evil you are 😊
God bless Mewtwo *talks to Mewtwo on how cool he is* and that's how cool you are Mewtwo!!! 😊 *I has a tamed Mewtwo*
I gotta agree Mewtwo is awesome! I wouldn't use him in battle though I feel like destroying my opponents would be a little unfair! :S
Silver Studio you noticed me :3
Of course!
I laughed about how it felt like Ed/Edd Warren was just trolling the protagonist Phill
"Yep, it's hacked alright" Okay this part made me laugh, because really, he already pointed out it was a hacked game, and then a bunch of weird things happened such as the Mewtwo's movements which I don't think would of looked that clear in Pokemon Fire Red due to the types of sprites, plus it following you and laughing like that? Dude, did you really need anymore confirmation than that to know it's hacked? x'D
Nobody said Pokepasta protagonists were smart aha!
Ay! Maybe I didn't do my best, but I did try to make it sound scary. :/
Straight Jacket Studios Don't take it as a personal attack or anything, I tend to evaluate creepypastas when I listen to them. Heck I'm a writer myself and I've laughed at some of my own past attempts at making something scary and when it comes to pokepastas it's even harder because what might seem scary at first glance can end up seeming too unbelievable to have any actual scariness in it. Not sure if you'll read this post through completely but here's some tips that might help out with writing future pokepastas, which I hope you do.
Excessive gore isn't scary or creepy. There's a time and place for it and using it too much can take away from it if it's important to the story.
The game effecting something outside, such as characters jumping out of the game. It's unintentionally funny and is really hard to make work unless the game itself is cursed and possessed by something. It's just a bit too far from reality to be creepy.
Avoid the pokemon being upset at the trainer for abandoning or not evolving them, it's been used so very often it's just a cliche at this point and isn't creepy in the least.
Often story ideas might work better within the actual pokemon universe instead of just through a game, so really think about which scenario it would be best in. Obviously you don't have to worry so much about realism when focused on the actual pokemon world and not just someone playing a game.
Avoid the cliche "He didn't faint, he died" it's been used so many times and it really isn't creepy.
Be aware of the story's continuity, sometimes writers repeat something that already happened or have the character do something that they shouldn't be able to do because of something said previously. This can really mess with the story.
Try to be original, too many people try to take aspects from other creepypastas and use them in an attempt to make something creepy. In the end it just becomes a shadow or sometimes a near exact copy of another creepypasta.
Look at the world of pokemon, examine things in it such as a Pokedex entry or even a character, anything with mystery around it has the potential of becoming a good pokepasta. A good way of planning a pokepasta is to ask " What, why and how?" An example being...Surge was apparently in a war, what war was it, why did it even exist and why was he a soldier in the first place. Why is he one of the very few characters or possibly only one, that says anything about the war? And how did the war come to an end?
Ask yourself these questions and then try to come up with answers that would make sense and also have a creepiness to them, from there you can turn it into a pokepasta. (Writing a summary to work off of helps too.)
Writing isn't meant to be easy, we often stray from our original ideas, throw things away or completely start over. But if you have a basic idea, turning questions into guidelines, then you have the potential of making a very good story. Of course just answering the questions you create might not work out well, you could make a story and just work the answers in. It really helps the story of something is answered and can be thought about afterwards. If the readers think "That actually makes sense.." then you're doing something right.
Anyway these are just some basic tips, you don't have to follow them but it could help you improve. I know they helped me improve with my writing. The important thing is to not take criticism as an attack and just take it as something to learn from. Oh and one more thing, proof read your story to make sure it makes sense and don't post it the same day you write it. Let it rest overnight then reread it to see if it's to your liking still. But all of that said, I hope to read or hear some more stories by you.
Thanks for the tips! I now make some good "Lost Episode" creepypastas. Still planning for a sequel though. But I was trying to do a Pokepasta similar to the creepypasta, "BEN DROWNED". But I'm not offended by your criticism, I'm actually pleased. Thank you! ;)
Phew glad you aren't offended. And you're welcome. x3
Haha that also made me laugh I kept on joking to myself about it! The way you said it was just mwa beautiful!!!! "Yep it's hacked alright" hahaha I should stop now
And omg when you said "hello wanna play a game?" I got a huge Jigsaw vibe
Omg the game is on acid XD
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I actually got that vibe too when I read it!
Sonic.exe in a nutshell.
Thanks for making fired red
#CLICHÈSFORTHEWIN
It was good until lavender town came up
why does this remind me of sonic.exe? its not a complaint i just think it sounds similar.
This heavily referencing Sonic .exe in certain parts.
Mewtwo.EXE
Story: *haha posessed mewtwo go brrrrrr*
Thumbnail: Depressed and injured looking catclone.mp4
HUH?!
BURN THE DAMN GAME
He has a point
This one wasnt too good. Poorly thought out story
STOP SAYING BAD WORDS
I'm sorry! I don't write the bad words but I gotta read them!
🤓
@@silver_ turns into a nerd emoji 🤓🤓🤓🤓🤓🤓🤓
This is *u n d e r r a t e d* but gives me the epic creep