Interview with Dying Company's Product Manager
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- Dying Company's Product Manager
More on patreon: / programmersarealsohuman
Interview with a Product Manager with Josh Doe - aired on © The Product Manager.
Programmer humor
programmer jokes
Product Owner
Industry Tenure
Corporate Humor
software development
#software #company #corporatehumor
![Interview with Product Manager in 2024 [Corporate]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/SXM728bzYTE/mqdefault.jpg)
![Interview with Product Manager in 2024 [Corporate]](/img/tr.png)
last product manager vid i Promise()...
then they gonna be out of job
We should have a meeting about this.
@@ahvideplaneetfirst let's have a meeting to pre meeting
(node:4796) UnhandledPromiseRejectionWarning: Unhandled promise rejection (rejection id: 1): Error: spawn cmd ENOENT[1] (node:4796) DeprecationWarning:Unhandled promise rejections are deprecated. In the future, promise rejections that are not handled will terminate the Node.js process with a non-zero exit code.
@@kailentit .then() ?
buildspace office?
“Our business model is your forgotten subscription fee”
"I didn't forget your link is literally broken this is illegal" -someone who couldn't reopen a ticket
@@feritperliare2890 “thank you for your 5 star rating”
Not gonna lie, I welcome my debit card expiring because all the emails about failed subscriptions gives me a better opportunity to figure out which ones I care about. :D
@@feritperliare2890That's why I specifically have a card with 0 money and credit limit. My heart becomes happy from all "not enough money bank notifications".
@@MazonDel This happened to me 1 week ago and im super happy
"Leave them confused. Increases time spent on the app"
way too accurate
Literally what google did woth search lol
Every time reddit makes a change
I already wondered if this could be like a real thing
Thank you all for coming. There was a lot of great feedback. Let's discuss this in more in more detail on the next meeting.
...
You're not allowed to just say that, man, you have to put a trigger warning on that $#!@
@@WM-gr4qiwomp womp
How many story points is that¿
🤣🤣🤣 The PTSD is real.
@@Rengah this actually reminds me of some very dark academic studies on human behaviour.
"Business is a jungle, and we're a stable rock. People see us and say: 'nothing will ever change'." _visionary hand gesture_
"Deadass. War stays the same. On god."
I lost it at "nothing will ever change"
Hey people, so nice to see all the confirmation! I thought this lots of times with any sorts of incompetent office: "They must be doing this on purpose, right?" Maybe reality is sometimes not that far off.
"technically it should be impossible, we made it possible.. we have a great legal team" BAHAHAHA
Ngl, this is actually the best product manager you’ve done. He has a purpose and executes. A real bias to action.
And one of the few product managers who'd actually get along with lmao
Are you an amazonian ?? ( Apologies if not, Bias to action is an amazon leadership principle and it is mandatory for every amazonian to slip in a leadership principle in every conversation they do)
@@rohit_bangaAmazonian?
I beg you don’t spread this cheap marketing slang
"Oh, I can't tell you what company it is." Because it's at least half of them
Another half still does not suspect they are dying one
If that's a real stock in the background we can find out... Paypal Holdings, Inc.
Last frame video zooms out and pans to right showing Paypal's blue logo :D
It was written under his name at the beginning)
@@VRchitectureThat is an absolute brilliant callback about 70% of the way through where you only get critical information at the start.
this is exactly how every dying software company i’ve worked for actually worked: endless meetings about output, no time left for output.
Mine was recently bought and is now just the software division if you will, but it's pretty clear we're headed that way. A particular favorite of mine among recurring themes is the lack of documentation regarding anything (including basic and common procedures) in a business context that provides devops. It's hard to configure a customer's installation if you have no f'ing clue how and the only people who do know are busy fixing the urgent issues at another customer because the higher-ups insist on biting off more than we can chew.
@@traveller23eStuff being documented is always the exception.
I can't believe he finally made a video about Adobe
Oracle, actually. Forgot the part about their legal department ?
@@chpsilva stock chart in the background is PayPal I believe
The stock is PayPal but this could be a lot of companies
😂😂
IBM represent
Make sure they cannot reopen a ticket
NEVER REOPEN A TICKET
IMPLEMENT A GITHUB BOT THAT CLOSES STALE ISSUES AUTOMATICALLY. THEN FORGET TO ADD AN OVERRIDE TAG. THEN MAKE MANAGEMENT OF THE OVERRIDE TAG ARBITRARY VIA UNDERSTAFFING *AND* RANDOM MANAGEMENT FEELINGS. ADD VOICE CONTROLLED MENUS. IMPLEMENT THE BOFH PHONE MENU LOOP BEHIND IT.
Just create a new one and link it
Well I know its for fun and all but in real life, this is super important to keep things organized. I work in a international company and our helpdesk has hundreds of tickets a day.
If we let customers reoopen the same ticket with some other different bullshit questions, it all goes to chaos.
so once a ticket/issue is solved, it cannot be reopen for organization purposes.
but yea it is super frustrating to them it has been mentioned more than once
Ah, this is how my support team works. Servicenow is the worst.
Our customer's hapinness is always our lowest priority xDDDDD on point
Of course, like priority number 1 (1 being lower than 10).
Or take months to reopen a ticket is more like it.
What matters is profit under this system
Product manager is incomplete nowadays without asking the team to integrate AI to only bin it months later
And his dozen of Scrum certificates
Product manager thinking “AI” is like some magic API that will learn by itself lol
Add a checkbox that remembers its value.
Your program now makes decisions based on info it has learned about that specific customer. That technically counts as AI.
"when they want to unsubscribe, they have to login again" - absolute classic
lol
Talking about the inevitable death of the company is the most productive the employees have been in a decade.
Is being afraid to share this with your company’s slack for fear that they might think it’s a reference to your company a bad sign?
lmao I'm in the same boat. they laid off 1/3 of our company last year and they've announced a "reorg" for nex month
@@vash47I've an unemployment insurance that pays out for up to 12 months if I ever get between jobs. Expensive but totally worth it.
Yes
depends whether or not you're ready to jump ship
That probably indicates you're in a wrong company.
It is the PayPal Holdings Inc stock on the screen 😂
I really wish he'd included it visibly going down in real time
Nice catch! For me, the video had a PayPal vibe anyway. I tried to get through the customer service labyrinth for weeks once, but it was impregnable.
@@gergelymarton yea 😆 it was the first stock I searched for
“Leave them confused, increase their time spending on the app”
I worked at a sinking ship that leeched off a stretched stakeholder funding. This is so true.
"Make the link to open a ticket broken"
I wish this was satire.
"When they want to unsubscribe, they have to log in again."
Ok, that's just pure evil.
1:34 The seagulls circle and scream as they sense the ship is set to sink...
'strong British accent' - shots fired!
It's not you! It's us!
He was afraid to say what he really meant: strong Indian accent.
The UK is the only country in the world where I haven’t been able to understand people’s English, so this checks out.
the rehiring part is wild
ive seen that IRL!
I've been that guy IRL... Getting rehired was the worst mistake I ever made.
@@nebufabu got shit from all sides then?
@@nebufabu whats the story? did you at least ask for more money?
@@sasagrcevic475 I did, quite a bit, but let's just say there was a reason they couldn't find anyone else and agreed to that raise... 3 more years of maintaining a website designed in the 90s by a desktop apps guy (and the company's then-current CTO, so of course, his design was just fine) and when we finally migrated it to then-modern frameworks, guess what happened...
How in a single lifetime can a person gather all experience this guy has
I think 2 real jobs and 3-4 intern/working student jobs and a few summer jobs should be enough to get all this. Because it is the same everywhere.
It took 1 year for me. These zombie companies are a lot more common than you think.
“Keep silent, keep compliant”, Im adding that as a KPI, thanks pal!
Too much wisdom from a PM!
I worked there. Was fired. Brought back. Fired again. Great place!
I had a suspicion that this guy was the manager of Curve Card, as soon as he said the likes of "our goal is to have such an awful customer service that the customer knows not to contact them a second time" I felt I was 100% correct.
The stock chart at 0:15 lol
Wait, I thought he was talking about my company 🤣
Very accurate, specially the change of logo
Mavenir?
Last second company revelation is priceless
did not notice. cheeky.
2:30 thats actually out-of-date. The UK had a lot of call centres 20 years ago because the then government issued "regional development grants" to deprived areas. Often those areas were in places with strong regional accents which can be initially hard to follow if you're not used to them. The RDGs were ended a long time ago and the jobs moved overseas once they were no longer subsidised.
He’s actually the best PM I’ve ever seen, at least he’s contributing ideas
i used to work here i wonder if they still have the problem with the 2FA locking everyone out of JIRA so we can't figure out what to post in our slack scrum meeting about getting the CI working with Jenkins. it's very imporant to establish a working process first and foremost before considering a customer need, that's how we knew we were legit. the problem was we couldnt file the 2FA problem as a problem without filing a ticket in JIRA, otherwise we gonna start eating up story points. our product was organic cat food.
Do people still use Jenkins?
@@ThatGuyFromMA what else for embedded?
do organic cats make good food?
@@megamastahGitHub action custom runner?
@@ThatGuyFromMA well, the repositories are not hosted on GitHub.
I used to work there, that was 8 yrs ago. They're still alive. I don't know how but they are.
Bro spill the beans... Drop the company name bro!
@@sdsappsandgames6262 i will do that later via an anonymous Glassdoor review which will read like a salty blog post even though everything in it is probably true
@@sdsappsandgames6262very end of video, frame right
He can't. He was re-hired with an NDA.
@@GeneralChangFromDanang you know how it works
lol, the stock price of PayPal in the background kinda hits the vibe of the vid
i was wondering what company that was
Bro designed the customer service for Evri.
My goodness I can't stand that company!
@@yakunats In a couple of years they'll rebrand to something else, like they did with Hermes.
Sounds like Deutsche Bank 😂 speaking from 10 years experience
"You must relogin to unsubscribe", ohhh no, pleace
At our company we believe in celebrating failure.
The funny thing is American Health Insurance companies aren’t dying but this is exactly how I imagine their project managers.
bro, the way he looks dead inside 💀💀
"we're a debit system so it shouldn't be possible, but we made it possible....we have a great legal team" 😂😂😂
I absolutely love your content. The duality of parity and truth makes me laugh, smile, and reminds me to be honest with myself.
Love the part where he says the customer identification number is not tied to anything and when you are finally out the labyrinth you end up talking to someone without any knowledge of the product, bad microfone and horrible connection 😅
And don't forget the strong British accent 😄
It gets really scary when bank fraud departments start doing this.
Atlassian, is that you?
The second half of the video started to feel a lot like a Microsoft description...
Microsol, more than any other company except maybe Google, gives the public perception of being less of a single company and more of a collection of autonomous units, fighting each other for resources. Think about how they can tease a new Xbox one week, then the next announce that Game Pass would treat consoles as second-class users. Or how Windows 11 tries desperately to increase adoption... while at the same time unnecessarily upping system requirements and shoving more ads into the taskbar.
Paypal customer service never fails to disappoint 3:47
The Google page actually shows the stock of PYPL
i had a colleague that worked in so many failing finance institutions. most of them actually had business irrelevant stuff as their home page banner, like sustainability / pride ( i am saying business irrelevant, not good / bad ). the only one that he worked in & got out of the crisis was actually the one that putted their dipping stock prices as the banner.
This is what corporate IT is like. If they were a company on their own, they would be a dying one.
this is... scary similar to my real life.
You can't tell me what company it is because it is every company. All the companies. All of them.
All companies have a couple of bad elements. It's when they come together that it crumbles
I work an IT-adjacent job in the same general sector and this is still extremely accurate. Down to every little joke.
Sounds like he's describing Vodafone.
"Oh, I can't tell you what company it is"
Oh, I know several companies in this exact predicament right now
I like this guy, he has strong and all encompassing concept. Let's propose him for a promotion, let's say Director of Operation. When everything goes south then he is our scapegoat.
This is literally AWS whenever I try to get any information regarding any usage / cost breakdown. Now it's whatever AWS decides to charge per month and not actually our real usage 😂
"When they unsubscribe, make them log in again!". Lol. This is like Kitchen Confidential but for IT.
I rated this video a 5 (it was the only option available)
Oooh so nice! You guys made a Broadcom/VMware video !
"Keep quiet, keep compliant" 💀💀💀
did you see the paypall sign? soo true
Hiding the company name in clear sight…. I waited till the end to confirm my suspicions
which company? sorry, i'm not the brightest.
@@FunctionGermany Debit system, bad customer service, (name in the background), it's PayPal.
@@pernydev6844Oh wow, yeah. If you pull up the all-time view, that's Paypal's stock ticker (and the number on the screen is their price as of whenever this was filmed).
I will post this in slack, see how many folks agree. The stock graph checks out.
@@pernydev6844 I though paypal was just for money laundering
make the link to reopen a ticket broke! hahahahaha our IT staff actually did this!
the stock in the background is of paypal...
Reminds me i have to call a company today so they can write a ticket for me so i can wait 2 hours for someone to look at it and schedule a call for me next week
The delivery on "we have a great legal team" kills me
first time watching this video, subscribed to keep delay the sinking ship :p
Jan D. is my product manager. Love the content thank you guys for making me laugh.
This was the guy responsible for the Crowdstrike fiasco
A lot of these were near-direct quotes from a recent Adobe leak.
A world where Adobe has kernel permissions and can push realtime prod updates is a nightmare hellscape I’d rather not imagine.
@@GSBarlevi can't find it. Do you have an article to share on it?
@@floflo1645 Can't share links in comments. The headliner was an Adobe high-up comparing their early termination fees to "heroin."
This hits harder than you can possibly imagine - 100% on point.
"customers are super annoyed....GOOD" :D :D :D
Peter Thiel is gonna have you MKUltra’d for this
This is eerily similar to any gov infra software project I've had the displeasure working on, they are dying before it even started and act it all the way through until it finally dies because pms don't understand the word "refactor" lmao
The person who does the least and gets paid the most… wins
LOL this is bang on
"... and a strong british accent ..." 😂😂😂
Paypal logo in the end 😂😂😂
If they had used Agile correctly they wouldn't have failed.
yes look ahead not where you were at where you at.
Isn't endless meetings a synonym of Agile?
@@robsosno yes we need to know that what we leave undone next since we so busy.
“…and a strong British accent” 😂😂😂
love that paypal stock is in the background
paypal logo in the corner at the end 😭💀
When I watch your videos my satisfaction += 1 and my self loathing -= 1
This guy is experienced in all sectors of the tech industry 😂
So much truth it hurts
A subtle detail you should have added was the share price in the background, (which I see is of PayPal's), gradually decreasing in jump cuts as the interview went on.
Sounds like Oracle 😂
That teeny tiny pan over to the beginning of a logo on the line "Oh I can't tell you what company it is." Genius
The way he's trying to overhear what his colleagues are discussing in the beginning and that specific look: that's the "is it finally happening?" look 😅
It genuinely looks like a video from The Office
This is pure gooooolld 😂
We live in an era that falls in the Venn diagram overlap of fact and satire.
The Microsoft keyboard on background was a nice touch 😂
Not a stone was unturned in this interview 😂😂😂
"we keep changing up the rating box layout, so the only link that works is 5" - - Golden...
Sums up Trademarkia pretty well
Just switch the whole company to using Emacs.
Company saved.
NEVER reopen a ticket.
The last part doesn't make much sense, since the company was identified at the beginning.
Actually it is my company. Really like 90% of what was said here.
Damn, Magnus Carlsen ain't cutting it in corporate