Behind Closed Doors (BAFTA AWARD NOMINATED DOCUMENTARY) | Real Stories
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2016
- Behind Closed Doors (BAFTA AWARD NOMINATED DOCUMENTARY) | Real Stories
With unprecedented access to the Thames Valley Police Domestic Abuse Teams, and the victims of violence they are helping, Behind Closed Doors gives an extraordinary insight into the most common violent crime to take place in the home.
Shot over 12 months, and starting from the moment an emergency call is received, the film follows three brave women who each waive their right to anonymity to show how insidious and terrifying domestic abuse can be. The complex emotions involved when someone you love becomes violent are also exposed, and the difficulties for police when those feelings mean victims are not completely honest.
With an unfolding, present tense narrative, the film also exposes the lack of consistency in terms of the length of sentence given to offenders. When the Police repeatedly take one perpetrator to court only to have magistrates release him again and again, the film demonstrates how the huge ordeal of going to court for these victims of domestic abuse does not mean that, in their eyes, justice will automatically follow.
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Behind Closed Doors was produced by True Vision Productions. If you wish to find out more the people featured in this documentary then go to truevisiontv.com/foundation
Content licensed from Digital Rights Group (DRG). Any queries, please contact us at: owned-enquiries@littledotstudios.com 
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When I was in my teens, my father told me, "Never stay with a man who abuses you. If he abuses you once, he will always abuse you. He'll never stop." Best advice I was ever given.
My parents taught me and my sisters the same thing. Also, if someone abuses you once, ask yourself how many beatings exactly you are willing to take (before you finally decide you need to leave). It should be zero...
Yes.your dad was right.abusive people never change.the control gets more and more severe.
My dad was my abuser 💔🤦🏽♀️
@@jmwjrsmom I'm so sorry. He is the first man you love. He is the first man that betrays your love. I only hope that you realize that men are not supposed to treat you like this. That you deserve not to be treated that way. Ever.
@@sharlawilliamson9609 I'm slowly but surely realizing this. Thank you for your compassion.
Domestic abusers should have to put their names on and go through the same process of announcing their identity as sex offenders.
Yes
Jas Rigg , Yes!
Exactly
YES
Yep or a searchable database
Well I guess if they’ve been arrested their mug shots will be on google
“He’s like a drug.” That is precisely what someone says when they’re with a narcissist. Only people who suffered the emotional abuse, gaslighting, manipulation of a narcissist would understand that lady. Incredibly grateful for these women’s bravery!! I wish them nothing but the best 🙏🏼🙏🏼
She is an idiot, and subjecting her son to that man who abused her....total stupid woman.
Exactly. The counselor woman in the beginning says something about them loving the abuser. It's a trauma bond and it's an addiction. Addiction to the cycle. The drama. With the narc it provides dopamine. It's definitely like a drug.
Exactly. The highs are incredible but the lows are insane. And you want so much to believe that they will change. And the worst thing is you love them with all your heart. You know they are damaged and you want to help them. And it doesn’t start off at 10 on the Richter scale. It’s first a punch in the wall. Then nothing for a month then accusation and a push. (All examples) until it escalates to a level where there is no self esteem left. And you become desensitised. It’s not far from Stockholm syndrome. And it’s shameful. You are a strong, intelligent woman who would never have gone with someone like that so you don’t want people to know. It’s insidious and so hard to describe to someone who has never experienced it.
So true, you stay for the kids, too. Stupid as it sounds. They mentally control you too.
Telling you no one will ever want you😰it’s really difficult. It’s easy for people to say. Why didn’t you leave. In so many cases there’s no support. Nowhere to go. You feel a failure. You’ve hidden then mental, physical abuse for years.
They are narcissistic liars. Who convince people it was you . Who was wrong in every way. The truth will always come out in the end😢
How she saw that vile ugly thug as "like a drug" is totally beyond bizarre and desperate.
She has her lovely son, and she needs to be responsible for him. She needs to think of the damage towards him, instead of that vile thug!!
I'm over 60 years old now and still remember the horror of my father beating my mum,it stays with the kids forever and is damaging
god love u
Exactly, but still these women continue to expose their children to these horrors because "they love" their violent and disgusting partners.
Sending gentle ((Hugs))
I watched this documentary whilst sitting beside someone who mentally, physically and verbally abused me knowing he knew what I was thinking. I left not long after. I thank God for this programme and my life was nowhere near as bad as these women in the physical sense. 6.5 years later though I still get that frightened feeling every now and then.
Debster DS67 - glad you found the strength to leave. Violence/control/abuse on any level only ever escalates. Hope you're happier now. ღ
Thank goodness you were able to leave safely xo
I am so glad to hear that you chose to leave a toxic situation and I pray for your continued safety & sanity.Thanks for sharing your truth!
I'm so glad you were strong enough to leave. xx
I'm so glad you had the strength to save your own life! God Bless you!
My ex husband was a drunk. He came home from spending hrs at a friends house drunk and angry. He held me down,popped my shoulder out of socket,held a pillow over my face. I managed to get him off me. He picked up an end table at threw it at my 6 yr old son barely missing him. I lost it. I put a knot on his head and bloodied and bruised his face. I went to jail for 24 hrs. I had my mom come get my son before going to jail. When I got out the next day I packed up all our shit,moved in with my mom and filed for divorce the next week. I slept like a baby for the first time in years.
Amanda denman very happy for you I wish you live long and happy life😊
Amanda denman , And after what happened, don't u hate it when ppl ask you "So why did you marry him in the first place?"?
Amanda denman I admire your strength. I'm sure it was hard for you but I applaud you and thank you for sharing your story.
Theresa Robinson
im glad you both are okay! so courageous!
The dog in the background of that first 911 call when the police arrive and are recording - I’ve never heard a dog make those noises. The abuse that woman endured must have been absolutely horrific and terrifying, to scare a dog into making noises like that.
A good friend of my sister had a terribly abusive husband. Even the police and judges were afraid of him. He always told her that if she tried to leave he'd track her down, kill the kids then her and her entire family, and he meant it. She had finally decided that no matter what she had to get him out of their lives even if she went to jail for life. Luckily he died in his truck one night of alcohol poisoning. Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.
If only this happened to all of them, men *and* women. My step-brother almost lost his hand to an abusive wife. She is so deranged that she tried to kill her first husband, a police officer, with his service gun!
Very clever 👏🏽👌🏽good girl 😉
She really needed to leave him and tell the police and the family about the threats. They do take that sort of thing seriously they do protect people if a serious risk is known.
You know what- "they are only able to prosecute if Sabrina agrees"- that's a fng problem. Many, many victims are scared, are still ring threatened or generally almost unable to do this. I know what that's like. Unless you recovered a lot, it's almost impossible to muster that strength, especially since many attorneys and others usually give you the prognosis of "better leave it, it's not worth it, you won't win..". We need to give the state the right to prosecute by themselves. Actually, I think a state in the US does this and I'm sure it saved a helluva lot lives. It lightens the burden off of the survivors.
police and courts do nothing except appease the perpetrator and blame the woman.. WHY CAN'T THEY DO THERE JOB AND GET THEM OFF THE STREET JOB DONE❗
I had a partner who, out of the blue, punched me in the face because I had not answered him quick enough. I found myself punching him straight back and running out the door forever. NEVER EVER stay with an abuser, if they hit you once they will hit you a thousand times
That’s the other thing ya look at someone the wrong way and they may take it the wrong way and attack. My co worker is like that I have to be super careful what I do and pray for my safety and also for him. I noticed that a lot of addicts are pretty abusive it’s scary.
Good for you for not looking back. I had one who threw my clothes outside bc I want getting out of the sea salt clothes fast enough for him. So that freaky but home when I read your comment. I told him if you gt 😠angry that easily, if I did something else you don't like you would throw me out the door too! I left him. He also out the clear blue sky just walked up and smacked a glass of liquid out if my hand. It splattered to the floor. He didn't even pick it up just left it there in the ground I guess he thought I was gonna pick it up. Yeah I did a day ... later.
If only every woman or man being hit smacked the abuser back.
@@mariahconklin4150 If he's a co-worker, keep records and tell others.
Super happy you got out quickly, but for a lot of people it’s more insidious than this.
By the time they hit you, they’ve usually already established a pattern of gaslighting and emotional abuse-you’re so broken down, that you genuinely believe you deserve whatever you get.
Even the dog is crying and traumatized - that speaks volumes. Poor puppy, if only you could talk.
Staffys are extremely verbal regardless of anything going on..
I'm surprised it didn't attack him
@@bernice-um2gbI never like using the term “it” to refer to others, however, for this POS, it’s almost too generous a term. No accountability, always the victim, these creatures are oxygen thieves! 😠
He would make the best witness!
Whoever these women are who are working for victims, giving their time, filming this doc… my utmost respect and love to you.
I only got hit once by a bf, I dumped him immediately and though he tried I would never take him back, the second his hand connected with my face, my feelings for him were dead.
I for one am extremely proud of you! You did exactly what you and everyone being abused should do. ❤❤to you😊
@@deborahstone9696 ,🙏
I felt the same way. But I was also deeply hurt and shocked that this person that’s always been gentle with me, just HIT ME IN THE FACE. It was a lot of feelings at once. I feel like the main ones were betrayal, complete shock and anger.. and I was done in that very second. Even though it took a longgg time for the heartbreak and mental wounds to heal. ❤️🩹
Exactly what I did, no way were my children growing up in an abusive home 😢
Well done
domestic abusers should be put on a register list like pedophiles
totally agree..
Kaitlyn King yessssss
Kaitlyn King and women that keep taking them back need life lessons
good idea
Agreed
The dog is crying for her. He/she feels her pain and it looks very nervous and anxious. Poor thing. :(
If that was a pit I waiting for it to lock that jaw lol! Whew! Hey ladies get a pit when your with a man like this. You never know. Could help us out :)!
The dog needs to be removed as well...poor baby 😔
Ik pit bulls can be nice but this is the time I wish he bit that guy
Bangers And Mash You sound like a stupid, I'll educated bully, easy to insult someone over the web, typical trait of a bully with no life.
no she is showing her strength it's okay to fight back it's okay to lose. sometimes losing is the best time of winning
It's crazy how Lawrence was so nasty to the woman he was supposed to love... and yet he acts quite obedient around other men, like the police officers who take him into custody. Very interesting how he can turn the rage on and off to suit his interests.
Yes I agree. Did you notice how aggressive he was to that lady though when she asked him if he was ok? (She may be a counsellor). He certainly hates women!
He kept getting away with it, this is the issue with all the Lawrences of the world. He is gonna badly hurt someone else because he knows now he can get away with it.
What is crazy is that she took him back. Her son must have been terrified
That’s because he can’t bully them. He’s a coward !
they are evil...they choose their victims. Their personalities are abnormal, their brains are abnormal, they are sadists. Every woman needs to be warned about these men. There are also abusive women out there too, just saying. In that case, the male needs to run as fast as they can away from her.
Whilst physical abuse is horrific, mental abuse is the unseen blight on many women. I suffered it from my second husband for 20 years. He took away my self confidence and, eventually, my reason to live. I contemplated suicide many times but didn't want to upset my daughter. I divorced him and am now slowly getting my confidence back. 👍🇬🇧
Same here. I divorced him 3 years ago. I still have no wish to be in another relationship. I would rather be alone than go through that again.
Usually people who are being physical abused are mentally abused too!!!
I hope you are doing well and thriving, xx
Well done you're a hero ❤
@@Conservatismshe’s talking about women not men. No need for your response.
I can not believe that a court would simply charge someone with a fine for beating the hell out of someone else, and then let them go free. What kind of justice is that? It wasn't even a big fine! Absolutely disgusting.
MadameFizzgig it's the British judicial system, it's so warped, lax, lazy and pitiful shamefully.
It sounds more male chauvinistic more than anything else. That system looks out for the males in that society over there. That's such a sad shame.
its not over there its here also...
I'll put it this simple: it's because he's a man.
You'd think the U.K. Justice system would be such that protects women. 2017 the shit that's happening to women in this day & age is atrocious. Worst of all women can't even depend on the just system...maybe when the fucker kills them🤷🏾♀️ this is why if a man attacks me I rallying the troops- I'm telling my dad & my uncles! sorry someone will be missing some balls.
That poor little dog is completely traumatised too.
Yeah its bad that. Poor things.
Her face is SHOCKING. How can anyone do that to someone you claim to love and still see yourself as a good person and or not abusive??
When he lied saying the drug dealer did it I could see how manipulative he was
Nasty wee pathetic low life gallus as with his obvious lies!!!
And this man was released again and again by the justice system, that’s horrific
He would literally of killed her. That's how bad her face was. One more big hit and she wouldn't of made it. It's honestly terrifying that anyone can do that.
That's not love, it's hate. These men are cowards. Imagine doing that to someone, it's not abuse uts assualt and attempted murder
This happened to me- as an American married a British dude 8 months after I moved to the UK! I had much support from the all the domestic abuse services & never saw him again. I stayed working & living there without him
I left a 16 year relationship.I got a barring order and he moved on with his Life thank god.he didn't want to see his 6 kids and they didn't want to see him .3yrs later i moved on with my life and i was tortured by my boyfriend at the time. Then it all went down hill after that I went 2the gardas here in Ireland and the way me and my Kidz were treated was disgusting.i ended up having a nervous break down from the stress of it all I'm on my own now and I will never get into a relationship again just becose the trauma we went through it's not worth it for my peace of mind it's great that the Garda are wearing cameras they do not have them back here in Ireland.❤
Unfortunately abuse is a really bad plague here that's way too common... Really glad you got the help you needed and hope our country is doing you well now!
So glad you got away and had help. Good for you.❤
In Atlanta, GA any domestic abuse cases go straight to state court to be prosecuted and the woman cannot drop the charges. Even if she wanted to. They made this the law because so many women who dropped the charges eventually ended up being killed by the boyfriend or husband. So now, if you claim domestic violence, you can't drop the charges. The case will proceed whether you want it to or not.
Anonymous it's the best thing to happen here in the US. Abusers should rot in jail, and hopefully they'll see what being the victim is like.
Quite right too.
Good!!
They changed the laws here in Canada as well and it's the same, the abused can no longer be coerced into retracting or having any charges dropped.
Does that work if the victim refuses to testify resulting in insufficient evidence?
Thank you to this British company who makes full length documentaries for FREE to educate people. Not everything is about money in the UK.
A
Wonderful!!!
It was made by a TV channel that’s paid for by advertising, the RUclips channel has just uploaded it (illegally) haha.
@@sophialovesfashion - They do not upload illegally, they license the documentaries from the production companies. I know this because they license one that I made many moons ago; much in the same way that a cable channel will license old tv shows for re-runs. The business model is essentially Real Stories hoping to earn enough from ad revenue to cover the license fee + generate a profit.
I wish I lived in the UK!
I was involved with a man who criticized a meal I made, and told me "dont do it again". My immediate thought was "I am out of here" and I was. Years later his future wife and mother of his 3 children told me she was traumatized by their married life together. He was diagnosed with bipolar during their marriage. My daughter and I were lucky to be out of his life
Not lucky ….. you were smart
Good for you
I am one whole year free from my abuser. I was spat at, slapped, head kicked in and my nose broken. To me the mental abuse daily was worse, the threats, the blackmail. I was a shell of a person. I didn't go one day in two years without being called a slag and other various names.
My mental health declined, I had panic attacks multiple times a day.
One year later, I am free. I have had not one panic attack in around 8 months, I've lost two stone, I am free. I thought I was never going to get out of that cycle.
I never looked back.
Women if you are going through this please please please do ANYTHING to escape
edit, my ex was arrested about 60 times and was charged only ONCE for attacking me in front an officer on body cam. The broken nose and all the other attacks the police NFA because he told the police it wasn't him or it was myself telling them i am mentally unwell.
I still feel mortified at how let down I had been
❤❤❤❤❤
My daughter was so brave, telling COS and police what he did to her. Her ‘dad’ denied it and was dropped. She has never trusted a friend or adult since. She is alone and talk therapy isn’t the answer.
Single parenting and going through a regimented cycle only exacerbates her loneliness.
I hope you’re now 2 years free ❤️ I’m sorry you were so badly let down, you’re a warrior ❤️
I am so sorry you had to go through that. Wishing you strength and happiness in your new future
2 here. So glad you found the courage to leave. They break us down so we have no confidence to leave them. Hope you’ve found peace.
Just a comment for those who "stay for the children". My husband grew up in a home with domestic violence. In his case, his Mother physically abused his father and he never fought back. At one point, she attacked him with a knife. My husband talks of taking his little sister to the closet and hiding. He said he prayed that they would divorce. All through elementary school he was withdrawn and preoccupied with thoughts of his Mom killing his Dad. The teachers actually thought he had a learning disability. When his parents finally divorced the kids were elated. They went through some hard financial times but there was no longer any violence. That learning disability? My husband ended up graduating college and nursing school with honors. BTW- he also became a volunteer on a domestic violence hotline.
In my opinion, people should leave abusive relationships because of the children.
Thank you for your Service!
kids can actually develop attention difficulties in homes where they are abused or witness abuse because stress hormones slow brain growth and their brains are locking in the basic networks they need for life at that age. these abusive parents should pay damages to their kids FOR LIFE because they disadvantage that kids ability to do everything you need to do as an adult.
💗💗
@@jantelopez5626 what a novel idea and pretty ingenious as well, the parents should pay damages to the children because it's true that the neural pathways are different in children who have been abused and witnessed abuse. Like how some perpetrators have to compensate victims of violent crimes.
The first woman is not only beat to a pulp, but the absolute terror in her voice AND the terror in her puppy’s little whines are proving to me that the psychological trauma is probably SO MUCH WORSE than the physical! Those bruises will heal a lot quicker than the ones we can’t see.
Mental pain can still leave scars like real ones
The violence is unforgettable for life. the memories never leave you. never heals.
Facts. That’s what experts say about it.
If you suddenly find yourself the victim of violence the emotional scares last longer than physical You will suffer bad dreams for weeks Some people are afraid to go out again
👍👍👍
I survived a murder attempt by an ex partner. He set me on fire, then threw me out of a window.
It was 30 years ago.
The mental scars are worse than the physical. I have been single since, and will be single forever. I will never allow that to happen to me again.
Wish you peace and happiness
Bless
You,, that's horrific. Yes I wish you nothing but peace and security for the rest of your life
What a terrible thing to happen to you. Much love to you!
I cried reading this, I'm so sorry that happened to you, and I'm so sorry that he's closed your heart off to other love, I understand it, but I feel sad that he took that from you. I hope you are content and happy ❤
I’m so sorry that happened to you
My first husband was a police officer and he told me more than several times how domestic abuse victims (women) would report their partners and subsequently retract their statements - very difficult but understandable especially when children are part of the equation
I think children bring part of the equation is even more reason to cut ties and prosecute.
Even her poor dog was crying for her . 💔They are very smart animals and can sense emotions and fear
The dog is scared !
That's why I feel pity for dogs along with other animals and plants
You are right that animals are very
intuitive and empathic. But I think he was crying because he was so
fearful and terrified of the man.
Yes, what a sad sight to go into. The officers interviewing him can see straight through his "l'm so innocent" sitting there with that poker face.😡
You bet that awful man had abused the dog & threatened to harm it..
Abusers want to get a pet or a child to hold against you.. MOST shelters don't accept pets.. so many women stay
The opening scene was horrific..my heart goes out to the poor woman. Also the dog whimpering broke my heart 💔😔
Yes, that dog must be aggressive against men now... cant blame it.
You can measure the seriousness and absolute terror simply by listening to that dogs cries
I was in shock. I thought it was staged first... Poor woman, poor dog, u couldnt hear the dog protecting her so it must be the sweetest dog ever.
So sad for that dog to have to witness all that and be terrified he probably kicked the dog or god knows what else
I don't think the dog could be aggressive it's so traumatised
I work on a major trauma ward, although most of the patients are accidents/unsuccessful suicidal attempts we do get several cases of domestic violence; broken bones, cuts, burn marks, horrible bruises, rape, head injuries. It's all there...most abusers start with control, isolation, manipulation and it often gets worse. Most of people who abuse others are narcissistic and psychopathic. They don't love you, they literally can't, their brains regions responsible for love, empathy and self control aren't developed properly. They will love bomb you to get what they want, that's it. You can't change them, their promises aren't real-they will lie to you. Remember you are worth so much more.
That is a really good comment ❤
It's really, really hard (as a young person, in particular) to resist these types, especially, if you were raised by their kind. You always think, "this time, it'll be different!" Or, perhaps, many of us are so used to really serious abuse that manipulative, controlling, and belittling behaviors are nothing compared to what we grew up with, and we think we can "handle" it, because he's "mostly kind, mostly nice" except when he's xyz (on drugs, drunk, or stressed financially).
I just wanna jump through the screen and hug the first woman. What she went through is horrific. I’ve dealt with abuse unfortunately many times but I’ve never been beaten to that point. I can only imagine how she feels. Much love girl. You will get through this and find the one who loves you, which is you!
Me too 😢
The puppy wimpering made me want to cry 😭
same
Really heartbreaking.
same
Robby Singer Bitch why? The woman was getting abused. Not the puppy. You should feel bad for the poor woman...
LillyPad they didn't say they felt bad for the puppy, they just said it made them want to cry. It is sad. The dog knows what's going on ain't right either.
As a child I was picked up from the phone box at the bottom of my street after calling the police to come and “ please help my mummy “ almost every weekend a fear that never left me. My mother is dead now because of domestic violence and I vowed never to let it happen to me or put my kids through what I went through and stayed true to that. I have witnessed 1st hand that fear and It truly is like no other. This kind of abuse robbed me of my mum and her of her future which has basically destroyed me anyway. This doc had me sobbing from the start
I’m praying for u this is truly sad as a victim myself I’m blessed I made it out alive he would stalk me even finding ways to find me in homeless shelters and I had to be moved 5 times until trial then when he was finally caught I had to beg my mom to let me come back home because she was scared he would find me there and he did he beat me so bad and kept me locked away when I escaped he was caught a week later hiding in our attic he went to jail for 3 out of his 5 years I divorced him while he was in jail then I got remarried fast out of fear he would come back for me he remarried and violated his probation for beating her then he went back and he won’t get out of jail till my daughter is 35 she’s 13 now I’m thankful and blessed he’s away but my other husband I married after him showed signs and it took one time to hit me he also got my daughter in the process she was 6 at the time I left him never looked back took time to be alone and work on me and in the process 5 years later I finally met a man who is so wonderful to me and my kids we been married now for 4 months and I feel so blessed I wanted to share my story with u I never posted this before but u touched me with your comment and I hope this can help u and others I don’t know u but I love u and u are in my prayers
I really hope you've been able to heal.
Bless you hope you can get some solace going forward 💜🌹💜
Devastating, so sorry to hear 😢
Sorry to hear what you experienced. I pray God will give you peace in your heart, and healing for your soul, amen. From Alv, Norway.
I remember leaving my abusive ex and it was the saddest I had ever felt. Now I look back and think of why I felt sad. So bizarre
Yes, it is bizarre, the confused emotions!
It’s not love … It’s Co- Dependency … Heal Your Heart … Empower Your Life … 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
this is what Trauma does to people. To connect a bad feeling to a good thing, and a good feeling to a bad thing. This is manipulation. Trauma is used to manipulate others.
That guy crying bc he found out that his actions had consequences was pure comedy. He been beating on others for so long without any repercussions that he was in complete and total shock and sadness when he realized that beating someone near to death bc they don’t want you is far from normal.
He deserves an Oscar!
I can't get over how lenient judges are on these people. I just can't.
There men ! Little empathy until it happens close to home !
Literally could get more time for getting in a fair fight at the bar! Wtf
Why did only one guy get a seven year sentence. ....?
@@jahmalachi1 we know why 🫠
Probably ex public school, beaten etc by their prefects. Also they presumably are reflecting the law, which needs to be changed to more severe sentences.
Paul and Lawrence. I'm looking for you. Lawrence our meeting will be brief! Paul, ours will be 6 hrs. see you soon.
😂😂😂
Loved this post. :)
i hope you bring a gun for lawrence lol unless your 6'2 and whatever
I do wish people like you actually existed. Beating these monsters to a pulp would be terribly rewarding.
lekkki1. I found one!
I was a toddler when I first saw my mum beaten up. I went on to see that several times growing up. I could not think about anything but my mum when I was away from her. I was scared, frightened, worried everytime I was at home or school. I thought of nothing except my mum being hurt. It altered me and messed up my whole life and I am terrified of men when they get angry. I hope these women will move away and live their lives happily.
❤❤
When I was younger I was seeing this fella for a few weeks, one evening out of the blue he struck me, I managed to get him to leave my flat, never again, no matter how much he tried to get back through the door. Please ladies be strong, you are wonderful as you are 😅
That poor dog is terrified. Even he/she needs therapy. Should be charged with attempted murder. All you have to do is look at her to see that he could have just as easily killed her!!!
He got 2years & talking about waiting for him!
He wanted to kill her!
The dog whining just broke my heart. Poor little thing is petrified. 😥😥
Luckily she called the police and threw it under the bed or else she would turn up to be a skeleton by now. Six hours of beating I wonder the strength she had the endurance and still she wants to hug and kiss him. Sheesh 😬
He ll probably have gotten that in US , in Europe they don’t care , you can kill someone take 15 years be out in 5 … ridiculous.
“ the dealer did it “ omg ! What a coward.
‘Only to cuddle her’ so sadistic and a pathological liar!
That's part of the psychology of abusers. It wasn't me. I am her protector. How dare you accused me! Nothing happened. She's lying, crazy. She's the abuser. These are the things they say.
@@katerineella274 yes ! Indeed ! These types come with red flags sadly even I chose to ignore for 5 years, he loves me he’s just jealous, it’s the drugs etc etc get far far away straight away never let your heart be pulled in for abuse. I hope u , that lady and everyone is ok.
Exactly he’s convinced himself even grrr
I was just thinking that lol
My ex-husband, a doctor and alcoholic tried to kill me at 14 weeks pregnant. The police removed him from the family home. The next morning, my mother came round, not to support me, yet to pass on a message from my father. Hed told her to tell me, " You're married, you've made your bed, now lie in it!"
I wouldn't expect anything other than that comment from my father. Given, I'd watch him beat my mother all my life. He's dead now, Leukaemia got him.
Someone else made a comment (I can't find it now) that these men come from a certain class, uneducated etc, I hope they see your comment and understand that abusers come from all walks of life. I'm sorry you had to suffer and withness abuse.
@@Saintsand_sinnersyep, my dad runs a group for anger management and it runs all the way from doctors and lawyers down to people who have never had a good job or done anything for a job.
I had a mental breakdown due to this, hospitalised in a psychiatric hospital. They were amazing. Rebuilding your life after takes forever. I have never had a relationship since, never will. I’m not old, i can’t actually finish watching this. Any women experiencing this please please run, even if it’s with only the clothes in your back. Try , try, try to get away❤️
I hope ur safe& feel better& staying strong.
The judges need to be sacked for their leniency.
Maybe the judges are also bullies!!!!!
The laws need to be amended so that judges can't wiggle out of appropriate sentencing.
@@sarahjanegrobler4396 Probably mysogynists and such themselves.
it's the UK. lol they are not tough on any crime really
@@YouAreMySunshine2 Seriously? Wow. I would have expected more from the countries leadership and laws. Not that I can do anything as an American, so I hope those that are British/of the UK, can make the changes necessary.
I went through this for 32 years. I finally got free in 2009. It ruined me. I refuse to date anyone, I just do not trust a man not to hit me.
Be strong and make a comfortable, safe life for yourself. You will see then how happy you can be. I am 67 and have been in several abusive relationships. Don't wait as long as I did. I have finally learned what it feels like to live in peace. Please. You can live better alone, with animals or a female friend than with a man. I know "not all men are abusers", but why risk it? These guys can sense it when you've been abused in the past.
You do not need a man for your life to be full. Take care of yourself.
Please be safe even if that means being by yourself
ME TOO JUST COMPLETELY DONE AND GENUINELY HAPPY LOVING ALL AREAS ME!!!!!😍❤ ANY VICTIMS PLEASE PLEASE BE SAFE AND I PRAY DAILY FOR THE VICTIMS WHO JUST ARRIVED HERE AND THE SURVIVORS💛💙💜💚❤💗
I agree especially after watching this.
Yep narcissistic abuse is not just physical-psychological abuse is so insidious you don’t realise what’s happening until you’re so far into it
Or when you break free & get away from being under their spell!
Such a compelling documentary. I shared this on my socials. As a man I can't comprehend treating women this way. My heart goes out to them and their children. Thank you for being so brave to be in this film. I am certain it has helped and will help a lot of people.
As a criminology student, I can tell all of you that the justice system in the UK is broken. In court, it's not about truth. It's about twisting a story to make someone come out looking the best. It's a despicable system that prioritises winning over justice. These men will continue to do harm as long as this system is in place
yep. it's about winning the case.
Because it's run by psychopats who are just as bad as the abusers
...broken and overwhelmingly obvious. it's as if the government approves of batterers. in my nation, USA , the Brits are overwhelmingly controlling the court system here and like England the Brits controlling our systems seem to enjoy this.
The jail time some of these men got is a complete joke! A proverbial slap in the faces of the victims. 😔
d.They put people avoiding paying taxes.They give ridiculous lower or none atall. I Guess its
As a man you cannot but hang you head in shame when you have monsters like this who also call themselves "men"...I shed a tear for each of those ladies and for the million others who have suffered at the hands of a man!
Thank you. You’re a rarity.
thankyou
thank you 🥺
Thank you from my heart.
These are not men. A true man would never do this to a woman. These are monsters. Sad excuses for a human being.
I've been there I had him charged he got a month in prison served two weeks bloody disgrace. He went on to abuse next victim and was charged strait away thank God I got the ball rolling. Thank God for the police the were brilliant they did save my life.
I am so proud of all these women ,I don't have a sister today through domestic violence.
Women should stand up to their abusers.
@@helenjanes1953 you're welcome
Dear God, how do you even survive being beaten for SIX HOURS!! I can't even wrap my head around being beaten for one hour let alone six! I hope she's doing better now and has found someone who truly loves her.
Yet she ”loves” him 🤨
@@eden19966 victim mentality....thats the problem
@@inasyal6311 That´s why I have such a hard time to sympatize with those women. I simply can´t.
@@eden19966 Then you don’t understand the problem. These women have a co-dependency with their agressors and need therapy to overcome it. One of them said it clearly: ‘it’s like a drug’. Drug addicts usually face great difficulty if they try to stop using drugs, as we all know.
@@DulceN A co dependence I despise and have no respect for. Therefor I find it hard to sympathize with these women.
All these dudes like "women hit men too!" Yep and it's still wrong. It's not a damn competition. If you have an abusive partner, GET HELP.
Right right!
Exactly!
Damn right
The reason some of us keep saying "women hitting men too" is because there is so much denial of that simple fact. We have thirty years of good quality survey data that shows that a significant minority of domestic violence victims are men, and still it's deny, deny, deny that men are victims. There are no services to support male victims.
Onion Potato Ive never met a person that denied domestic abuse on men.
This is as heart breaking as it is infuriating.
It’s takes loads of courage to come forward and make a statement against your attacker especially when you still have feelings for them. I’ve been in these kind of relationships and remember how hopeless, alone and trapped I felt. If I told the police the truth things would often get worse. If I kept quiet it went back to the normal cycle of making up, slowly reverting back and then huge blowout often each time getting worse. It’s sad that the women that find the strength to testify and make statements to the police are often not believed, treated unfairly and rarely see justice for what has been done to them. The abuser gets a slap on the wrist and is free again. This gives them the opportunity to attack again and emotionally manipulate everyone in the victims lives into thinking that she made it all up, she’s the one abusing/crazy/on drugs whatever they can say to try to smear her name and further hurt the victim. While things have come a long way from how it was for our mothers/grandmothers it’s still a huge problem and many barriers to these women getting help and safety from their abusers.
They should be judge for attempt of murder and not "domestic violence"
Was just thinking the same
I agree also, know a victim for a few months, when we parted she had just service a horrid beating and was leaving with her abuser to try again. Her sister has heard nothing from her since then.
Phone the police🤦
Some of them, absolutely, I could not agree more. My father attempted to strangle my mother when I was 14, pled down to some nonsense like "simple harassment" and was, appallingly, able to return to the home. Choking like that is attempted murder, period.
I was a school teacher and one morning a parent asked me to step outside for a moment. When she lifted her head I was so shocked. Her face was completely battered. I told her to please go to her doctor and to the police. And to get pictures! She wouldn’t because she was too frightened. Why? Because the police do nothing to help, and she had to go back to the person who beat her. More should be done. Also men are abused, let’s not forget them. I would just like to say it isn’t love it is fear.
The Dad is absolutely right. The judge and the whole damn system put his daughter in Danger. This is DISGUSTING. It is this kind of justice that gets women killed.
Yes I was let down ,! That ruined my son & my relationship ! He tried to kill me ✝️& He WALKED with a 1.5 years on UBH 👊🏻PROBATION
@Peb Kit very well said.
men who are abused are usually piler of their community hide behind a mask they are charming manipulative. But it's sad society blames the women and there is no accountability for the man
@@stacitowery4461 yeah it's called fear most of these women are not protected because when they do speak out they are killed
@@Maz-zb9uf ???
I got hit once by a bloke.
Once. Never gave him another chance, and i can spot them a mile away now, abusers. I fear the current economic situation will make it worse. Stay safe. You are worth more than this ladies.
People not understanding why Helen would meet up with him and just chock it up to an emotional attachment is so sad. When you know a monster is lurking in the shadows, many times, it’s safer to know where they are and what they’re up to, than it is to wonder where they’re hiding. It’s a safety measure that survivors might not even understand why they do it.
Great comment...there are a lot of holes in the legal handling of these issues, so those affected are trying to keep tabs and stay safest at all times, which makes sense. They need to account for the holes in the legal system when making decisions...unfortunately, it can be safer to back down and go back or back down and keep tabs many times. While legal systems can and should get better at protecting and bringing offenders to justice, those affected should not be stigmatized or blamed for making the decisions they find safer as they progress away from an active abuser.
This is insane..these women are fighting for their lives..It doesnt seem like the courts are taking these beatings seriously at all... That Paul who blamed her beating on a drug dealer is a total sociopath. He lies so easily. I hope these women have found happiness away from these monsters. Excellent documentary
La
What are you talking about . They had a whole room full of people who come together to help these people. They can only do so much.
Violent assault is criminal and no one alive not one person is responcible for a violent assailant thought or action , because a whole person doesnt behave with criminal i difference to another. Misogynism is a freak show of male developemental deficiencies.
In Britain, you can get "life" for cold-blooded murder, which will be 20 years. You'd serve 15. So it doesn't seem surprising that violent abusers keep getting released.
society protects bullies. when are we going to make bullies scared to bully?
My heart aches for these poor women! And that poor little dog!
why? They can leave,...the poor dog can't. I feel more for the dog
@@mollyhorse because I have a heart!!! (And women can't always leave!!)
@@mollyhorse Did you watch the doc properly? Do you understand the psychology ? And I’m guessing you’re a woman...how can you say that? I hardly ever respond to people on any kind of social media but you have completely disgusted me . Nasty.
The dog breaks me up. The women need to stop taking these bastards back.
The three of you are my Heroines!
You are absolutely amazing and such an inspiration to other people!
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being so incredible brave!
You girls deserve the world!
The dog knows , my dogs did when my husband was in his anger mode. They were just as terrified as I was and just as happy when we escaped and ran 1000 miles away from him.
That POOR LITTLE DOG just cries and cries....the dog is traumatized too for real.....
😔
The staffy?. I think the staffy was originally crying because it was shut in the kitchen and then it cried out because she was restraining it when it wanted a free roam. Staffies are lovely dogs, but some can be a bit overly affectionate and it was probably to stop them from distracting the police or the people interviewing her.
That was bugging me too 😔
Protect your poor little dog 🥲
It broke my heart hearing the poor dog so traumatised. And it makes me so angry that children and animals have to witness everything that's happening
I am a man and my heart aches for these - and all women - who are abused. It's particularly abhorrent because these are men they loved and trusted. For shame.
HAPPENED TO ME ALOT,BEEN RAPED BEATEN,THING IS DONT SCREAM,THERE GOES YOUR VOCAL CORDS.I DONT KNOW HOW I SURVIVED.RIGHT NOW I HAVE A GUY OBEST WITH ME THAT WONT LEAVE ME ALONE
🙏
Thank you for saying that sir. My heart ached when one of the women said "All I ever did was love him".
Its unbelievable
Wow a man that empathises with the woman most men blames the victim and defends the man
I also feel heartbroken for the poor innocent dog crying at the beginning of this video. He/she will have being absolutely terrified, plus, it’s possible he’s abused the dog, if he can do that to his partner. Hope the dog was seized & placed in a happy peaceful home.
It is over fifty years since I suffered physica and mental abuse, as well as my children. To this day, I always keep my doors locked night and day.
My dad was so abusive and never got sent to prison…years later he stabbed his new wife 4 times and now he’s doing 18 years…they need to put them in prison!!
when you were a kid did you wish someone would just knock on the door and take him away? i wish people would think of the kids instead of being to feeling sorry for bullies
@@jantelopez5626 yeh, to be honest he used to ring the police a lot and say he was ‘concerned for our well-being’ after he beat up my mum so I always thought he was…a evil villain that never goes away, it was strange for him not to be terrorising us and I still almost miss him…sick…parents should definitely be quicker to leave, we should be taught about different forms or abuse and who to talk to in school
@@jordannikita4483 yeah i mean you miss what you know right? everyone misses being a kid a bit .. and it helps us to think of having a place you can go if anything doesnt work out. i honestly think society can provide that place if we reframe what we are trying to achieve .. i.e emotionally stable motivated considerate people
@@jordannikita4483 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16🥰
@@oliviagrace6914 don't get what thats got to do with stopping people murdering and abusing their families in this life .. lots of people preaching these days .. hasnt made a dent in the prevalence of child abuse
"The first time he hits you, is the last time he sees you." Mom and grandma always told me and my sister that.. I've been lucky so far, my heart bleeds for anyone who suffers this.
I was that kid and the anxiety and fear of men has never left me
I work with DV victims in the United States. This documentary was fascinating. I learned that police and victim advocates face all of the same challenges and difficulties in the U.K. as we do in the U.S. Abusers use the same kinds of tactics, no matter where in the world they live!
Julia worked with my mum and my family on our domestic violence case against my dad and she was amazing! This touched my heart so much because this documentary was in my area in the same court I appeared in and the same officer that worked on our case 💜 I hope all the victims are well now 💜
It was mentioned in the documentary that people seam to think that there is no help for domestic violence and that they cannot protect you but it simply is not true.
It is taken very seriously and victims are kept safe ( if the authorities actually find out about it and the victims co-operate )
@@mrx2586the help is certainly out there its the laws that are a joke how can you beat someone pretty much half to death and only receive 2 years? I know tbis was ages ago but the law is still no better today
💕💕💕💕💕
🫂
@@danielcunningham6727 The problem is that convicting someone requires proof beyond all reasonable doubt, this is a very high threshold to reach in any case but DA is particularly bad because a lot of it happens behind closed doors.
If a persons claims they have been beaten half to death by their partner.
and they clearly have lots of injuries that are consistent with this.
but the partner claims it was someone else who did it.
then they have to prove beyond all reasonable doubt that the alleged victims story is true and the aledge perpetrators claim is not true.
if upon proving that the perpetrators claim is not true they then come up with another excuses that has to be proved untrue as well.
nothing that the perpetrator claims has to be proved, everything that the victim claims has to be proved, any excuses the perpetrator comes up with has to be disproved.
The same is true is the perpetrator makes no claims at all.
This high burden of proof cannot be removed because it exists for a very good reason. without it anyone could be thrown in jail on nothing more than the whim of a person in authority or who decides to make a false accusation.
That's why violence against women must be liable to prosecution by the state, instead of by the victim initiative. Those women are terrified and with zero self-esteem, beyond women are socialized to go through lots of pain and discomfort in the "name of love". That's why so many battered women remain with violent men. It's a very complex state of mind, it's not only a thing to say: "separate! or leave him!", there's much much more behind.
That's exactly what should happen , basically a law that states emotional and physical trauma has caused the victim to become compromised due to a rational fear of past events against them by said individual up to and including current case .if worded right but said for both genders it would have to be plausible .maybe get the feminist activists on it because they would be quite diligent of the topic or start a spark on Twitter social media, lots of people out there with agendas get a persistent lot onto this topic and an amendment change could make so much of a difference your comment is how legislation should be thinking.you have to be clever to catch these fuckers and when your blood boils it's a normal reaction but it don't stop atrocities.these are heartless cold scumbags they know how to manipulate they are more than abusers they have a touch of con artist about them .
pincel64 I did separate I left my abuser a year ago this is Patricia 1980.
Here in Sweden it changed into being liable to prosecution by the state, and that was a change for the better of course, but the problem is that it's still difficult to get a conviction if the victim doesn't "want" to cooperate. The quotation marks are there because of the manipulation and fear involved.
pincel64 lol haha
In New Zealand the police can continue with charges even if the victim wants to drop the charges
I tried watching this but it brought back to many bad memories. I know God loves me, and has saved me. I will gladly stay alone for the rest of my life, because I am never alone with God.
You are soo right.I myself have been on my own for 31 years. Now raising my grand child by myself. ❤❤❤ yourself hun. Your not alone 😊❤
omgosh the first lady and her very scared dog God bless you and your lilttle baby cling to eachother and remember you are strong and you don't deserve this you deserve love and NO physical , mental and emotional violence!!!!
this goe's to all women and men in this situation!!
Thank you to the women who were brave enough to stand up and be included in this documentary 🙏🏻 Know your worth, and know you will be able to make it on your own 🤍 Love is not any kind of abuse, ever.
❤
💜
I have no sympathy for Helen. She gets brutally battered by her boyfriend and then makes her son sit down and have dinner with him after she takes him back. I only feel sorry for him.
@@GhastlyCretin85 I do...feel for her. Her boyfriend was a narcissist and a bully and for her part she truly believed she could help him change. A lot of women feel this unfortunately. Watching this documentary kind of puts me off either dating men or meeting someone I have spoken to online because the truth is we never know who we are going to end up with because they always show their best side, charming us and drawing us in until we realise it is too late and they hit us...and not for the last time either! First time a man/boy hits me will be the last because I am leaving! I did too...a guy I was in a very short relationship with tried to strangle me! I said 'f' that and I walked away...I was one of the lucky ones I guess. Sisters we need to look out for each other and boost each others confidence! Don't let the bastards grind you down! 'Men' who hit or abuse women are not 'real' men! They have no respect for women!
@@sandrafisherhayes3219 I'm a man who was mostly raised by a single mother. If any of my mother's boyfriends ever abused her (my mother would never have put up with it) it would have been psychological torture to ever have to be civil to them again. Let alone sit down for dinner with them. She really shouldn't put her kid in that position. It's so selfish that I find it hard to sympathise with her.
I have been there too. Difference is that I called the police straight after when I escaped and he's been arrested. I am a single mother of two for a year a half now but I would never regret this decition. No one will ever hurt me again.
I was in a situation where I was being threatened. I decided to fight back and got out. It was that very crucial moment when I made a decision I am so happy I made.
I’ve never experienced abuse but feel blessed for that. My love and support for these poor women 💔💔
I have cried through the entire episode. No words to express the amount of compassion for these women and their bravery
Man I realize how lucky I am to have non-abusive parents/spouse. These people are strong. They are heroes. That phone call gave me goose bumps. These abusive people deserve prison for life. Just my opinion.
Amen
I agree.
Faith in humanity restored!
put him to prison...i put my ex husband to prison for 10 years, last year
read my story above, god bless you
I just saw this tonight. I was absolutely moved. Gut wrenching and eye opening to see Sabrina so soon after the incident. I hope she’s doing okay today. Also interesting to see Lawrence’s behaviour escalating the more times he got reported but mind boggling to hear that the consequences didn’t change.
I’m happy to see these women getting counselling and other support as building up their own strength and self worth is the only way they will find the courage to leave for good. After being beat down and treated like dirt for so long you start to believe your worthless or like you don’t deserve a good living partner. If anyone else is in this situation right now I can tell you from experience with the right support and self love you can survive without them. It will be so hard in the beginning but it gets so much better. There’s life after abuse. You deserve so much more ❤
That dog's crying is killing me.
Gosh me too. I can't imagine all that dog had seen and the fear and helplessness it felt.
@@TheElectroFaith yeah for sure. Poor thing was probably in the corner somewhere scared shitless.
SAME!! He no doubt abused that poor pup too. Most animals that live in domestic abuse, are often a target and do not live long. These monsters attack anything they feel they can control and that is weakwr than they are. This includes pets. soooooo saaadddd
@@keepdreamin1 they’re babies in grown bodies. People who can control their emotions but strong enough to hurt people. Every single one of them are sad because they think they’ve been wronged. Crazy
Me too
These poor children who grow up in this environment. Breaks my heart.
What sort of "mother" stays in an environment like this with a child? Sorry...I have no sympathy at all.
A very scared mother stays..most have no where to go..or no $$...or has and hes frightened her to return..so many scenarios...
@@mollyhorse Yeah and these women will choose man after man like these abusers....Whu
@@mollyhorse As we saw in the documentary, they're told how he will find her and the children if she does leave, and as we saw, can find her over and over again. Many women stay to protect their kids, if the abuser threatens them, or threatens to have them taken away, to find them at school and hurt them if she leaves.
Attitudes like yours make women feel unable to come forward for fear their friends and families will have the same response. They've survived years of complex, manipulative abuse and are fearing for their lives, the very last thing they need is someone who behaves as though it's her fault and calling her a bad mother for suffering the abuse she survived.
@@mjturner6291 What crap! I have been in an abusive situation...the minute my abuser hit my child I LEFT!!! And told him I was going to the Police if he ever approached me again. Its women like you who makle excuses for women as to why they shouldn't leave. You should be ashamed of your attitude.
These stories are terribly heartbreaking, yet incredibly empowering, at the same time. The courage it has taken for these women to come forward, and publicly share their stories, is spreading invaluable awareness. Furthermore, it is so wonderful to see the extent of the proactive role that the police are taking. Their extensive understanding of recognizing the signs of, and handling domestic violence situations, really shines. It's truly a great, and lifesaving measure. I hope the United States will implement this same level of training and dedication to these types of crimes, because it is desperately needed, here. As someone who suffered through 8 years of crippling, physical and emotional domestic abuse, I fully understand how important it is that we work to advocate for victims, and reduce the numbers of these crimes through early intervention, and methods of victim support.❤
May we all take a moment to say a huge thank you for the dedication and support, of all the agencies involved who support the victims of domestic abuse.
Also not forgetting all the children who have witness domestic abuse, and the impact that it has on their little shoulders that they carry for the rest of their lives. But the abusers still walk free, where is the Justice for this crime?
that dog is a witness considering how distressed it is. That is brutal what that women went through.
I’m assuming the dog has been beaten, too.😢
Lone Wolf an animal can only watch and try to help but sometimes they don’t know how so they cry and bark and yes dogs can cry with tears
Christina Felger and there are people on some RUclips shows in the comments saying that dogs don’t have souls. But I know the difference Animals do have souls.
I've never seen anyone beaten like that. That man should be locked up forever he is capable of killing someone.
That dog should be trained into a protective dog or get a protective dog.
The dog broke my heart. Her dog clearly loves her so much. He/she was so nervous and scared. If only dogs could speak. Dog is a sweetheart
These Poor lady’s, the dog crying is so heart breaking 💔
The dogs reaction is everything. So so sorry 💔
that puppy is so scared. hes so worried for his momma.
I lived like this for 12 years until he went to jail. I've been free and single for almost 6 years.
Don't go back!! Move on and stay single and happy!!! Maybe one day you will find a man who would love you and never beat you. But focus on yourself first and make yourself happy. Don't ever let a man beat you or harm you in any shape or form....
@Keith Steward You realize that people can’t just leave their abusers? The abuse usually isn’t only physical. It’s emotional and mental as well. The abuser can manipulate the victim and the victim feels like the abuser still loves them because there could be instances of love bombing or gifts. There’s also financial limitations. The abuser could take all the money or the victim just doesn’t have the money or family to go to. They may also fear that the abuse would get worse if any attention is brought to it. Not all justice systems work well enough to bring justice to abuse victims so the abuser could have been suspected, ignored, then goes back to doing what they do but this time worse in order to punish the victim for asking for help. It’s a much more complicated thing to deal with. No one can just leave no matter if it’s abuse from family or abuse from a partner
@@Nada-zy4xp sorry sis. U did the right thing.
@Keith Steward Women aren't about to go taking lectures from men on this subject.
If you watched this documentary you'll see even if someone does try and get away, the abused likely won't be arrested straight away, they won't be thrown in prison and they can get back to the person they abused.
My friend was abused by her husband for years and everytime the police came out, he'd hit himself in the face and tell them it was a fight, and the police would leave. When we got her away and hid her from him, he'd threaten her family and friends and she'd go back to keep them safe. We set up cameras in bed home to secretly record him but the police would release him on bail and he'd get back to her and tell her to drop it or he'd have his friends murder her parents.
No one wants to be terrified in their own home or hurt by the person who they love. If they could get away they would. You're no better than these men are to put the blame on these women.
Good for you. I hope you are well, Safe and Happy now.
My father beat our mother to a pulp when he was drinking.....he was a animal,but such a different man sober. It really does affect the kids...us....the pain and fear that comes with this kind of abuse for my mum and myself my siblings......I'm 64 years old and it still stays with me.. it makes you feel so worthless and scared 🤐
I'm sorry. No one deserves that. Not your mom, not you
I left 30 years ago, I went to the shop with my 2 children, 2 bags of clothes, make up and hairdryer, I never went back, I just left
❤
These men need to be put on an international register. I was attacked by a man who I'd known, and had daily contact with for five years. Ten days after I allowed him to move in with me, he attacked me, demolished my home. He was picked up and spent one night in jail. Only much later did I find out that he has done this before to other women.
I lived through this as a child,the violence I saw every night of the week was truly awful.
Why.....I did ask my mother why she stayed...her reply was...she stayed for my sister and myself....That answer still does not make any sense
Because the alternative can sometimes also be grim. She might have struggled to feed you. I’m really sorry for what you went through
The unknown is scary to I think.
It's happening to me too. I just can't. I want my mum to be away. And all she says is it's for me and my little bro. All it makes me is guilty bout not being able to do anything. Being powerless. This feeling just is the worst.
happen to me as well my dad was very violent between my 3 to 5 y.o
its effected me alot and my mom needed medacation afterwards
i asked him a few years ago why he did it
he said he was young and stupid
she might of being irritating but she didnt deserve that dad
same to you brother
she was also somewhat abusive and it was a strain to be around her
in the end i threatened her and stopped being her carer
psychotic i went got help, moved out and am rebuilding my life
This might sound rude, but it's not, I hope you're never in a position to understand her decisions. It's the most awful thing and you cannot know until you're in that position
I have been there I was in abusive releationship. For many years I walked away with one suitcase and a two year old daughter I have never looked back my daughter is doing well and so am I 😢😢
Helen is Trauma bonded 😢 Anyone involved in DV should understand that