@meiko Here's a kicker for you. I am a heterosexual man who is married. I am not gay nor do I feel anything for the same sex. However, I found myself watching your videos simply because I was interested in why someone would make the moves you have made. All I know is you are a brave and courageous young man who fights for his right to exist and I really believe you are a hero to a lot of lost kids who need to find themselves. Thank you for sharing your life and keep up the good work. cdlmagic
I was a butch Lesbian all my life. But I never felt like a "masculine woman." I felt like a MAN. Now I am starting my transition into being a man.and will call myself a straight man because I like women.
@Popeslave EXACTLY what I've been thinking. I'm actually thankful this happened, in a way, bc of the response that is taking place. The way we are working together & discussing these things & opening up important dialogues around these issues is so encouraging & powerful & it makes me feel... blessed, connected to something so much bigger than myself, a true part of this community.... The hurt/anger I felt to see YOUR picture in her blog for ex. made me realize how much I consider you a friend.
You exude so much intelligence and thoughtfulness for someone not only your age, but any age. If the majority of this country was willing to put so much thought and eagerness to be challenged as a means of learning into their daily lives, what a different country we would have... And I don't even mean simply on the subject of being trans or other, I mean just in everything we come across daily. You sir, are quite the human being.
Gosh, what a tough topic...You raise a lot of topics here that have been floating around a LOT in lesbian and transman communities. Thanks for dispelling several myths, and for speaking what's real for you. I'll think about this more too and will include it in a future post. Thanks Meiko.
just yesterday i read that quote you put at the end and loved it so much i wrote it down, and here you just happened to put that same quote! craziness. but anyway, thank you so much for your grounded and peaceful message.
Hi Meiko. Your comments here in response were far more gracious than the ridiculous blogger deserved, and I'm glad you chose to speak out. Trans and butch lesbian are very definitely not the same thing, although the latter is sometimes a waypoint preceeding the former.
Meiko, I'm Gay and one of my best friends is Trans. I have been his friend for over 20 years. Your video expressed the SAME feelings he has had for all these years. Thank you for your honest, open and spot on video! I have subscribed to your page for quite a while and always thought your were so handsome and sexy. But after this video, I see there is so much more to you than I could have ever imagined! You are totally awesome! Love ya so much and I'm very proud to be a friend! :)
I just wanted to share. As a transman, as a gay man, I have been on the brunt end of discrimination in the GLBT community. I am a "fake" man to the gay men, I am a "traitor" to the lesbians. I am nor have I ever been a lesbian so do not see how I could be a traitor to them. I also do not see how being born genitally different, would make me a "fake" man. It is a shame that one cannot be accepted for who and what they are.
Love your videos. One thing I want to question though is the idea that dating women/desiring women's company, etc is somehow evidence that a person doesn't hate women. It's not. Many men "love" women, want to have women around AND want to dominate them AND look down at them. I think the real evidence that you don't hate women is being a good feminist, educating yourself, checking yourself, and doing the hard work it takes to treat women like people in a society that doesn't.
thank you for making that video and this one, it's something that has actually helped me in my process of transition and it was good to hear somebody be honest about their feelings with testosterone. i do not want to go on hormones and i want top surgery. that is enough for me and i have come to peace with my decision to do this. just wanted to say thank you and let you know that video actually really helped me.
After years of being married to a man (and thereby somewhat alienated from queer communities), I'm just coming into this discussion of butch women vs. transmen. I am still unsure of my own position on the issue, and not really certain that I should have a position as a woman-identified cis-female. But I have to say that this video touched me, challenged me, and made me uncomfortable, which is good. Because that discomfort means my point of view is broadening. Thank you.
What gets me is that those that seek equality and acceptance would be so judgemental towards others that seek the same. We are all entitled to be who we are, the planet is big enough for all, jeolousy and hatred is such a wasted energy. One should not have to explain where in the GLBT alphabet we feel most comfortable in. Live and let live has always been my motto. Good video
As always Meiko, enlightening and insightful. Nobody can compartmentalize anyone else's lives, sexulaity or experiences. Dang I hate to say it, but can't we all just get along :)
@skeskali Hey there, thanks for being part of the discussion and keeping an open mind. I know it's a loaded topic and impacts different people in different ways. So thanks!
Thanks for posting this, I've had a lot of questions about the lesbian/transman dynamic and this helps. When I was in college times were different and even bi women felt a lot of pressure to conform to certain lesbian-separatist ideals and were in the closet about sex with men if you believe it, banging a guy was a betrayal of fellow wymmin and not politically correct.. "becoming" a guy (physically) just blows the lid right off... I've noticed something's been changing and very curious about it.
"Total butchness"- what a concept. This whole thing seems so crazy to me. Just as there is no one way to be trans, there's no one way to be a lesbian. There's no one way to be a butch lesbian. However, I totally hear you on the competitive feeling that you felt. But, isn't it crazy that we would ever feel that way in the first place? It blows my mind that there can be so much hatred within the LGBTQ, etc community. Thanks for your honesty Meiko, standing up and speaking out.
Hey Meiko, i totally get everything you were trying to say in this vid. I've been telling the same thing myself to people as well. There's a wide spectrum of labels and identities in lesbian community and i've always believe that none is better than the other. It's just all about being who you are and how you live your life with what you have. Yea. Stay strong man. =)
Great video, good to hear more opinion and your views on this subject. Equality is the ultimate goal of all, or should be and if we can build some cohesiveness and/or solidarity between us we would be so much more powerful as a combined grouping! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!!!
There is a strong, beautiful, rising movement of folks trying to bring creative, positive & educational energy in response to this hateful blog. This video is an excellent contribution. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Glad you made this I reported the blog it's just amazing the mess that's said by those that seek to insight fear. This is why we have a lot of the issues we do. Miseducation is taken for fact and it's really sad. Positivity breeds change loved this response she's looming for hatred but were not like that.
I guess this is why I am watching these videos, even as a cisgendered straight girl, I like to learn more about other people, and why you all identify they way you do. I try to be as open-minded as possible.
Wonderful video, I completely agree, we are all individual, different expressions that as you beautifully say "compliment each other". Thank you so much for sharing.
@MeikoEliasXavier Sure. I just think it's important we differentiate between what somebody's doing that's hateful and trying to psychoanalyze them. This woman is applying a hostile feminist framework to transitioning that doesn't fit many transpeople, and by applying a transpolitical framework to her, we're doing the same thing. But I know you know that. Respect.
Your identity is yours,no=one else's.Most humans just seem to need to hate something/someone.You're obviously very bright & have an idea of who/what you want to be,if that's fluid,well fluid is better evolution :)what throws me is that if you identify as male,then you're male,not a gay woman so why are women feeling threatened by you(gay/straight/other).l wish people would stop being so stupid,Maybe there's hate because you've gone out & done something brave,Being courageous is hard!!Well done.
I have a question..and im not sure how to ask it lol but please know that im not judging you in any way..and i dont mean this to be rude AT ALL...but..does one of the things about being a transman mean that you will get surgery to have male parts instead of female parts? and if not..then doesnt having female parts still make you female?
@Popeslave Agreed. I just wish someday she will find peace and will not be filled with so much anger and hate. By the way, one of your pictures is on her site I saw. Just so you are aware.
I also noticed that a lot of transwomen stick together (at least the crowd I see) and that I hardly see the same camaraderie among transmen in my area. I'd like to see a united front for trans indiv's because as we fight for gender identity protections, we need BOTH transmen and transwomen visible. Just a thought
The only thing with trans/butch is that sometimes I can't tell if someone if trans or just really butch. I think it's weird asking someone if they're a transman or just really butch. I just don't want to offend anyone.
i have that same zen calligraphy calendar. i love it!!! i can see the shame that this woman made you question yourself, in your eyes about putting yourself in the public eye. nevertheless i think you are a great example of someone doing what is right for themselves in terms of transitioning. you pay attention to your mental and physical states, therefore you know what is best for you in your own life... nevermind her hateful & derrogatory depiction of us trans-men. fuck all the hate!
@MoonBlythe I don't know why you mean by "your mind filters." In answer to your question, I don't feel I am in the right or wrong anatomy. It's not something I question as right or wrong. I am not coming from a "right or wrong" perspective.
@Popeslave right, but that's kinda off topic. I don't recall seeing anyone say she is probably trans and I didn't tell her myself. it was something I said as a comment on this video. it was my personal opinion. that's all.
I guess this topic never gets old. This is all ego stuff and it is a major reason why I do not even bother anymore. We have major issues in the world and people get so hung up on issues that have little to no bearing on the world at large. Who cares what your gender issues are? Are you a caring, decent person who gives a rats ass about anything real that is happening outside of our microcosm? Like the fact that a transgendered woman was burned a lived and dumped on the side of the road? sad....
@MeikoEliasXavier This is exactly what I don't get... since nature loves variation, then why not accept that one of the variations is to have a mindset that is different from that of how other females may perceive themselves? It seems that would be more similar to being gay than what you are saying. The issue of "knowing your gay" has to do with choosing to act on feelings you would have for the same sex because the opposite sex doesn't ignite your sexuality or emotions. very different issues.
what i've never understood is this: how can you know that you don't identify with the body you were biologically born with, when you have not yet existed in the body of the other sex, before transitioning? More importantly, why do I seem to be attacked as someone "transphobic" simply for asking these questions? along the same lines, how do you know that the inability to identify within one's biological body is not a psychiatric condition that can be overcome? Again,sincere questions, not hateful
@assdoooouuutttt Also please consider that there is no room in life for assumptions. If you have never heard her voice then you have no authority to speak of her voice. As a community, we are upset because she is speaking falsely about us and our individual experiences. Making assumptions about her, or generalizing about butch lesbians provides "them" with the ammunition they need to retaliate back and keep this cycle of misunderstanding going, which is the last thing we need.
@lilkush909 So you're saying people shouldn't live in the way they are most comfortable because of some strange notion of preserving an identity? Maybe we should bring in some policies like they do with old buildings - The butch lesbian preservation act: you are no longer allowed to make changes or add any kinds of extentions to masculine female bodied people as they are part of our herritage and must be preserved in their original condition...
@sneetchinflux I think I know what blog he's talking about and it's absolutely disgusting. what's even worse (imo) is the owner of the blog tries her hardest to look like a man. personally, I think she's itching to come out as trans, but can't for whatever reason. I wish he had posted the link to the blog so I could confirm whether or not we're talking about the same one. I also wish I could remember the name of the blog I was talking about.
@AnonyMouseification I have actually read a LOT about this, in addition to knowing many trans people, and I still have not really had my questions addressed. Instead, I get assumptions of ignorance or phobia, as your comments to me have implied.
@Hyena400 oh, well in that case, the way she looks and acts does belong to men. she is wearing clothing that is made to fit a man's body. it's just science. she doesn't just try, but having never heard her voice, I can only assume she succeeds. when transmen decide to transition (I assume) they don't continue to dress in women's clothing.
I hate the fact that people have to find some reason to bring more hate into the world. Trans people are people to aren't we? Coming from a fellow transman, I have no problem with butch lesbians. But I will admit I do get that jealous feeling that you got when you were younger...then again I get that with biomales as well. So it is just an insecurity on my part, and I know this. But I have no problem with them, just wish I could be more masculine.
@assdoooouuutttt I think a lot of people are speculating why this person is spewing so much hate, suggesting she's really trans but can't admit it. With all best intentions I have to say doing so is a waste of time. It doesn't matter! No one can say whether someone else is "really trans" and on the other hand she might hate trans men so much because people keep telling her she *is* one & she's not. She identifies as a butch lesbian. I identify as a gay trans man. I hope we can co-exist someday!
@moldingMe I know, thanks. :) Nothing I can do about it though except continue trying to educate others about my true experience, not one that someone who doesn't know me makes assumptions about.
@Hyena400 that's not what I said at all. I didn't say anything about all butch lesbians and I didn't even mention effeminate men.... I was speaking about ONE person who clearly tries their best to look act and be seen as a man, but thinks she has the right to tell transmen they'll never be men. don't put words into my mouth.
@assdoooouuutttt Fair enough. Several people have said those words (about her) to me since I learned about the website and I'm just saying I disagree with making assumptions about someone as a counter reaction to them making assumptions about me.
@assdoooouuutttt Being a butch lesbian doesn't necessarily mean you're itching to transition. There's a big world beyond binary gender so please, let's not start suggesting butch women and effeminate men are people who simply haven't come out as trans yet or that they're somehow unrepresentative of their sex. If we support gender freedom for ourselves we need to support it for everyone, including those who unfortunately can't do the same for us.
@assdoooouuutttt I'm not trying to silence you, but I need to disagree with you. There is little about clothing that is "science". Women wear clothing marketed towards men & men wear clothing marketed towards women & often find that things fit just fine. Likewise, many women try on clothing "designed" to fit their body & find that it doesn't. Marketing & advertising are not science & yet M & A are most responsible for what clothes end up in which sections & which body types are most represented.
@assdoooouuutttt by saying she "tries (her) best to look act and be seen as a man" you're again implying the way she looks and acts belongs to men, not women, along binary lines. i was trying to respectfully point out that this way of looking at the world comes from a very similar place to hers, not to put words into your mouth.
So to clarify - you feel more like butch lesbian (trans) than like a man? I know that this is never black or white but you know what I mean. And related question - your partner is calling you her boyfriend or girlfriend? I know that you like when people are calling you "sir" but on the other side you are talking a lot about butch, so I just wondering:)
@gadsdensnake That sounds horrible and I think it's despicable that you have to deal with such small-mindedness on a daily basis. But with all due respect, I don't think transitioning is the way to deal with the harassment of which you speak. Transitioning doesn't make things easier and less complicated.
@AnonyMouseification You seem to like to tell me what I believe and what I understand, rather than asking me for clarification. So far you have been dead wrong and totally off base in trying to climb into my mind. Therefore I'm done attempting to communicate with you. You have NOT described my line of thinking. You think you understand where I am coming from but you absolutely do not.
@Queeractivist Sorry, but I couldn't disagree more with you. This person is spewing hate - Not quite sure how you missed that... Pretty much everyone here would agree with me on that. Also, I know plenty of lesbian identified women who would/have/will date a male identified person if the energy was right and they loved them. Sexual orientation is different for everyone. Nothing is "across the board" or applies to everyone.
@meiko Here's a kicker for you. I am a heterosexual man who is married. I am not gay nor do I feel anything for the same sex. However, I found myself watching your videos simply because I was interested in why someone would make the moves you have made. All I know is you are a brave and courageous young man who fights for his right to exist and I really believe you are a hero to a lot of lost kids who need to find themselves. Thank you for sharing your life and keep up the good work. cdlmagic
I was a butch Lesbian all my life. But I never felt like a "masculine woman." I felt like a MAN. Now I am starting my transition into being a man.and will call myself a straight man because I like women.
@Popeslave EXACTLY what I've been thinking. I'm actually thankful this happened, in a way, bc of the response that is taking place. The way we are working together & discussing these things & opening up important dialogues around these issues is so encouraging & powerful & it makes me feel... blessed, connected to something so much bigger than myself, a true part of this community.... The hurt/anger I felt to see YOUR picture in her blog for ex. made me realize how much I consider you a friend.
You exude so much intelligence and thoughtfulness for someone not only your age, but any age. If the majority of this country was willing to put so much thought and eagerness to be challenged as a means of learning into their daily lives, what a different country we would have... And I don't even mean simply on the subject of being trans or other, I mean just in everything we come across daily. You sir, are quite the human being.
Gosh, what a tough topic...You raise a lot of topics here that have been floating around a LOT in lesbian and transman communities. Thanks for dispelling several myths, and for speaking what's real for you. I'll think about this more too and will include it in a future post. Thanks Meiko.
just yesterday i read that quote you put at the end and loved it so much i wrote it down, and here you just happened to put that same quote! craziness. but anyway, thank you so much for your grounded and peaceful message.
Hi Meiko. Your comments here in response were far more gracious than the ridiculous blogger deserved, and I'm glad you chose to speak out. Trans and butch lesbian are very definitely not the same thing, although the latter is sometimes a waypoint preceeding the former.
Meiko, I'm Gay and one of my best friends is Trans. I have been his friend for over 20 years. Your video expressed the SAME feelings he has had for all these years. Thank you for your honest, open and spot on video! I have subscribed to your page for quite a while and always thought your were so handsome and sexy. But after this video, I see there is so much more to you than I could have ever imagined! You are totally awesome! Love ya so much and I'm very proud to be a friend! :)
I just wanted to share. As a transman, as a gay man, I have been on the brunt end of discrimination in the GLBT community. I am a "fake" man to the gay men, I am a "traitor" to the lesbians. I am nor have I ever been a lesbian so do not see how I could be a traitor to them. I also do not see how being born genitally different, would make me a "fake" man. It is a shame that one cannot be accepted for who and what they are.
Love your videos. One thing I want to question though is the idea that dating women/desiring women's company, etc is somehow evidence that a person doesn't hate women. It's not. Many men "love" women, want to have women around AND want to dominate them AND look down at them. I think the real evidence that you don't hate women is being a good feminist, educating yourself, checking yourself, and doing the hard work it takes to treat women like people in a society that doesn't.
thank you for making that video and this one, it's something that has actually helped me in my process of transition and it was good to hear somebody be honest about their feelings with testosterone. i do not want to go on hormones and i want top surgery. that is enough for me and i have come to peace with my decision to do this. just wanted to say thank you and let you know that video actually really helped me.
After years of being married to a man (and thereby somewhat alienated from queer communities), I'm just coming into this discussion of butch women vs. transmen. I am still unsure of my own position on the issue, and not really certain that I should have a position as a woman-identified cis-female.
But I have to say that this video touched me, challenged me, and made me uncomfortable, which is good. Because that discomfort means my point of view is broadening.
Thank you.
What gets me is that those that seek equality and acceptance would be so judgemental towards others that seek the same. We are all entitled to be who we are, the planet is big enough for all, jeolousy and hatred is such a wasted energy. One should not have to explain where in the GLBT alphabet we feel most comfortable in. Live and let live has always been my motto.
Good video
As always Meiko, enlightening and insightful. Nobody can compartmentalize anyone else's lives, sexulaity or experiences. Dang I hate to say it, but can't we all just get along :)
@skeskali Hey there, thanks for being part of the discussion and keeping an open mind. I know it's a loaded topic and impacts different people in different ways. So thanks!
"meant to compliment, not take away from each other" - perfect!
I enjoyed the video, what is the card behind you saying. I was interested in the calming appreince of your background.
Thanks for posting this, I've had a lot of questions about the lesbian/transman dynamic and this helps. When I was in college times were different and even bi women felt a lot of pressure to conform to certain lesbian-separatist ideals and were in the closet about sex with men if you believe it, banging a guy was a betrayal of fellow wymmin and not politically correct.. "becoming" a guy (physically) just blows the lid right off... I've noticed something's been changing and very curious about it.
"The fun of life is learning about things that you didn't know before." Love you Meiko!
"Total butchness"- what a concept. This whole thing seems so crazy to me. Just as there is no one way to be trans, there's no one way to be a lesbian. There's no one way to be a butch lesbian. However, I totally hear you on the competitive feeling that you felt. But, isn't it crazy that we would ever feel that way in the first place? It blows my mind that there can be so much hatred within the LGBTQ, etc community. Thanks for your honesty Meiko, standing up and speaking out.
you're really well spoken ... and some stuff really resonating ... keep up the vids ... i can guarantee that you're helping a lot of people ...
Great way to address the issue. You're so right...we're all trying to evolve...into better people...well some of us are. Peace.
hey meiko, i just wanted to tell you know that i really appreciate your videos. Thanks for your perspective.
Hey Meiko, i totally get everything you were trying to say in this vid. I've been telling the same thing myself to people as well. There's a wide spectrum of labels and identities in lesbian community and i've always believe that none is better than the other. It's just all about being who you are and how you live your life with what you have. Yea. Stay strong man. =)
Great video, good to hear more opinion and your views on this subject. Equality is the ultimate goal of all, or should be and if we can build some cohesiveness and/or solidarity between us we would be so much more powerful as a combined grouping! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!!!
There is a strong, beautiful, rising movement of folks trying to bring creative, positive & educational energy in response to this hateful blog. This video is an excellent contribution. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Glad you made this I reported the blog it's just amazing the mess that's said by those that seek to insight fear. This is why we have a lot of the issues we do. Miseducation is taken for fact and it's really sad. Positivity breeds change loved this response she's looming for hatred but were not like that.
I guess this is why I am watching these videos, even as a cisgendered straight girl, I like to learn more about other people, and why you all identify they way you do. I try to be as open-minded as possible.
You are so smart and such a beautiful person. You didnt turn into a misogynist once you transitioned... that is great.
That was great Meiko. You really Rock!
@Hyena400 Well said! We have to fight butch-phobia just as much as trans-phobia. Our similarities are just as beautiful & powerful as our differences.
Wonderful video, I completely agree, we are all individual, different expressions that as you beautifully say "compliment each other". Thank you so much for sharing.
.... We need to accept and support each other....
@MeikoEliasXavier
Sure. I just think it's important we differentiate between what somebody's doing that's hateful and trying to psychoanalyze them. This woman is applying a hostile feminist framework to transitioning that doesn't fit many transpeople, and by applying a transpolitical framework to her, we're doing the same thing. But I know you know that. Respect.
Your identity is yours,no=one else's.Most humans just seem to need to hate something/someone.You're obviously very bright & have an idea of who/what you want to be,if that's fluid,well fluid is better evolution :)what throws me is that if you identify as male,then you're male,not a gay woman so why are women feeling threatened by you(gay/straight/other).l wish people would stop being so stupid,Maybe there's hate because you've gone out & done something brave,Being courageous is hard!!Well done.
I have a question..and im not sure how to ask it lol but please know that im not judging you in any way..and i dont mean this to be rude AT ALL...but..does one of the things about being a transman mean that you will get surgery to have male parts instead of female parts? and if not..then doesnt having female parts still make you female?
@Popeslave Agreed. I just wish someday she will find peace and will not be filled with so much anger and hate. By the way, one of your pictures is on her site I saw. Just so you are aware.
I also noticed that a lot of transwomen stick together (at least the crowd I see) and that I hardly see the same camaraderie among transmen in my area. I'd like to see a united front for trans indiv's because as we fight for gender identity protections, we need BOTH transmen and transwomen visible. Just a thought
The only thing with trans/butch is that sometimes I can't tell if someone if trans or just really butch. I think it's weird asking someone if they're a transman or just really butch. I just don't want to offend anyone.
i have that same zen calligraphy calendar. i love it!!! i can see the shame that this woman made you question yourself, in your eyes about putting yourself in the public eye. nevertheless i think you are a great example of someone doing what is right for themselves in terms of transitioning. you pay attention to your mental and physical states, therefore you know what is best for you in your own life... nevermind her hateful & derrogatory depiction of us trans-men. fuck all the hate!
@MoonBlythe I don't know why you mean by "your mind filters." In answer to your question, I don't feel I am in the right or wrong anatomy. It's not something I question as right or wrong. I am not coming from a "right or wrong" perspective.
@Popeslave right, but that's kinda off topic. I don't recall seeing anyone say she is probably trans and I didn't tell her myself. it was something I said as a comment on this video. it was my personal opinion. that's all.
great video and conversation!! i love your insights!
Great vid Meiko
Great vid. Five stars for spreading some knowledge to RUclips.
I guess this topic never gets old. This is all ego stuff and it is a major reason why I do not even bother anymore. We have major issues in the world and people get so hung up on issues that have little to no bearing on the world at large. Who cares what your gender issues are? Are you a caring, decent person who gives a rats ass about anything real that is happening outside of our microcosm? Like the fact that a transgendered woman was burned a lived and dumped on the side of the road? sad....
If you are a trans man, you are not butch. You are not butch, because you are no longer a woman, you are a MAN...
I just wanted to say that you're such a beautiful person and I really enjoy watching your videos!
I know of butch-as-hell lesbians who have nothing on this dude. (smiles, humor, nyuck-nyuck ?get it)
@MeikoEliasXavier This is exactly what I don't get... since nature loves variation, then why not accept that one of the variations is to have a mindset that is different from that of how other females may perceive themselves? It seems that would be more similar to being gay than what you are saying. The issue of "knowing your gay" has to do with choosing to act on feelings you would have for the same sex because the opposite sex doesn't ignite your sexuality or emotions. very different issues.
what i've never understood is this: how can you know that you don't identify with the body you were biologically born with, when you have not yet existed in the body of the other sex, before transitioning? More importantly, why do I seem to be attacked as someone "transphobic" simply for asking these questions? along the same lines, how do you know that the inability to identify within one's biological body is not a psychiatric condition that can be overcome? Again,sincere questions, not hateful
@assdoooouuutttt Also please consider that there is no room in life for assumptions. If you have never heard her voice then you have no authority to speak of her voice. As a community, we are upset because she is speaking falsely about us and our individual experiences. Making assumptions about her, or generalizing about butch lesbians provides "them" with the ammunition they need to retaliate back and keep this cycle of misunderstanding going, which is the last thing we need.
This is one great video. Thanks for making this.
Do you know of any good books on gender identity issues?
@lilkush909 So you're saying people shouldn't live in the way they are most comfortable because of some strange notion of preserving an identity? Maybe we should bring in some policies like they do with old buildings - The butch lesbian preservation act: you are no longer allowed to make changes or add any kinds of extentions to masculine female bodied people as they are part of our herritage and must be preserved in their original condition...
could someone please post a link to this other blog? thanks!
Your surgeon did a superb job. You look great.
I'm just curious... How much did the surgery cost?
i like this vlog. it answered some questions 4 me. thank you!
@sneetchinflux I think I know what blog he's talking about and it's absolutely disgusting. what's even worse (imo) is the owner of the blog tries her hardest to look like a man. personally, I think she's itching to come out as trans, but can't for whatever reason.
I wish he had posted the link to the blog so I could confirm whether or not we're talking about the same one. I also wish I could remember the name of the blog I was talking about.
@AnonyMouseification I have actually read a LOT about this, in addition to knowing many trans people, and I still have not really had my questions addressed. Instead, I get assumptions of ignorance or phobia, as your comments to me have implied.
@Hyena400 oh, well in that case, the way she looks and acts does belong to men. she is wearing clothing that is made to fit a man's body. it's just science.
she doesn't just try, but having never heard her voice, I can only assume she succeeds.
when transmen decide to transition (I assume) they don't continue to dress in women's clothing.
I hate the fact that people have to find some reason to bring more hate into the world. Trans people are people to aren't we? Coming from a fellow transman, I have no problem with butch lesbians. But I will admit I do get that jealous feeling that you got when you were younger...then again I get that with biomales as well. So it is just an insecurity on my part, and I know this. But I have no problem with them, just wish I could be more masculine.
@assdoooouuutttt I think a lot of people are speculating why this person is spewing so much hate, suggesting she's really trans but can't admit it. With all best intentions I have to say doing so is a waste of time. It doesn't matter! No one can say whether someone else is "really trans" and on the other hand she might hate trans men so much because people keep telling her she *is* one & she's not. She identifies as a butch lesbian. I identify as a gay trans man. I hope we can co-exist someday!
Damn your voice is deeper than mine!
Inspiring video! Keep up the good work dear sir!
@moldingMe I know, thanks. :) Nothing I can do about it though except continue trying to educate others about my true experience, not one that someone who doesn't know me makes assumptions about.
HEY DUDE. ARE YOU CANADIAN?
Interesting. Too bad we can't have too many drinks and argue about all this. Lovingly, of course.
You FUCKING RULE!! Thanks For sharing what I feel too and don't know how to say it! Imma Transguy too BTW.I agree with what u said.
great vid, so wierd that people are so hateful :S feel u on the butch lesbian thing.
@Hyena400 that's not what I said at all. I didn't say anything about all butch lesbians and I didn't even mention effeminate men....
I was speaking about ONE person who clearly tries their best to look act and be seen as a man, but thinks she has the right to tell transmen they'll never be men.
don't put words into my mouth.
Oh my god you are really good looking. Congratulations by the way, epic change.
@assdoooouuutttt Fair enough. Several people have said those words (about her) to me since I learned about the website and I'm just saying I disagree with making assumptions about someone as a counter reaction to them making assumptions about me.
Excellent and knowledgeable video
@fournya He's my doppelganger! Love him, thank you!
What's there to not understand? Transmen are men [mentally], butches are women :S
@Hyena400 regardless, I am still speaking of ONE person that I have had experience with. (I left a couple comments on her blog) so... yeah.
@assdoooouuutttt
Being a butch lesbian doesn't necessarily mean you're itching to transition. There's a big world beyond binary gender so please, let's not start suggesting butch women and effeminate men are people who simply haven't come out as trans yet or that they're somehow unrepresentative of their sex. If we support gender freedom for ourselves we need to support it for everyone, including those who unfortunately can't do the same for us.
Do you ever think that you still feel like a girl emotionally
This is what I call unique and Gorgeous :)
@assdoooouuutttt I'm not trying to silence you, but I need to disagree with you. There is little about clothing that is "science". Women wear clothing marketed towards men & men wear clothing marketed towards women & often find that things fit just fine. Likewise, many women try on clothing "designed" to fit their body & find that it doesn't. Marketing & advertising are not science & yet M & A are most responsible for what clothes end up in which sections & which body types are most represented.
That video was epic, you're cute, and I loved how you addressed a gamut of questions.
@assdoooouuutttt
by saying she "tries (her) best to look act and be seen as a man" you're again implying the way she looks and acts belongs to men, not women, along binary lines. i was trying to respectfully point out that this way of looking at the world comes from a very similar place to hers, not to put words into your mouth.
So to clarify - you feel more like butch lesbian (trans) than like a man? I know that this is never black or white but you know what I mean. And related question - your partner is calling you her boyfriend or girlfriend? I know that you like when people are calling you "sir" but on the other side you are talking a lot about butch, so I just wondering:)
@AnonyMouseification It seems you really missed the essence of my questions
@MoonBlythe I actually created the video...
@sneetchinflux you would think, but your learn something new everyday. and we wonder why we are always at war?
YES. thank you for this video.
You're so handsome... *swoon*
@gadsdensnake That sounds horrible and I think it's despicable that you have to deal with such small-mindedness on a daily basis. But with all due respect, I don't think transitioning is the way to deal with the harassment of which you speak. Transitioning doesn't make things easier and less complicated.
Very handsome man! I'm heading in the opposite direction.
@AnonyMouseification You seem to like to tell me what I believe and what I understand, rather than asking me for clarification. So far you have been dead wrong and totally off base in trying to climb into my mind. Therefore I'm done attempting to communicate with you. You have NOT described my line of thinking. You think you understand where I am coming from but you absolutely do not.
@Queeractivist Sorry, but I couldn't disagree more with you. This person is spewing hate - Not quite sure how you missed that... Pretty much everyone here would agree with me on that. Also, I know plenty of lesbian identified women who would/have/will date a male identified person if the energy was right and they loved them. Sexual orientation is different for everyone. Nothing is "across the board" or applies to everyone.
In fact "butch" was originally a term that was usually used to refer to straight men that were very masculine long before lesbians were using it.
@munkeebrayne why thank you :o)
dude. oh my god. you are fucking hoooooooooooot. you're awesome.
@MeikoEliasXavier u seem like a nice guy. thts why i asked. have sum canadian friends n they are really nice ppl.
gawdd yer hot.
and identity politics is such a head ache.
One small question- are you a gay transman? I am just hoping you are, so that I can atleast comfortably fantasize once that you are in my arms.