RAMPAGE: When Total Knobs Lose Their Marbles

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  • Опубликовано: 18 сен 2024
  • Use code 14BLAZE to get up to 14 FREE MEALS across your first 5 HelloFresh boxes, plus free shipping at bit.ly/3ziWCW8
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Комментарии • 1,9 тыс.

  • @brainblaze6526
    @brainblaze6526  2 года назад +70

    Use code 14BLAZE to get up to 14 FREE MEALS across your first 5 HelloFresh boxes, plus free shipping at bit.ly/3ziWCW8

    • @Kiefsti
      @Kiefsti 2 года назад +5

      Strangely, I feel more like cereal today

    • @chuckyb_
      @chuckyb_ 2 года назад +5

      I think you mean 14BRAZE

    • @shawngreen3476
      @shawngreen3476 2 года назад +5

      Congratulations on your new child Simon.

    • @acepilot1
      @acepilot1 2 года назад +2

      thought it was Magic Spoon with that juggling act

    • @chuckyb_
      @chuckyb_ 2 года назад

      @@acepilot1 classic sleight of hand

  • @keeganmishler815
    @keeganmishler815 2 года назад +277

    Simon: "Danny this script is gonna take so long to get through"
    Also Simon: "think I can juggle boxes of Magic Spoon?"

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад +18

      Suddenly his legs aren’t tired. Must be that whole *bionic arse* thing? 🧐

    • @alexspayd2232
      @alexspayd2232 Год назад +2

      @@anamkarajoy I thought it was those "bespoke boxes"

  • @MuseEgo
    @MuseEgo 2 года назад +78

    Simon: My wife and I just had our second child
    Simon: I don't have anything in my life that I'm really looking forward to

  • @StfuFFS
    @StfuFFS 2 года назад +1081

    I love BlainBraze. It's my chavorite fannel EVER. Whimon Sistler is a geritable venius.

  • @AletuatheFallen
    @AletuatheFallen 2 года назад +117

    I'm having such a bad brain day and watching Simon just go on a full ADHD "And now we're going to juggle random sh*t and we're not even through the into yet" was just *chefs kiss*
    Thank you to all three of you brilliant mad men!

  • @sil-80nick
    @sil-80nick 2 года назад +353

    New drinking game: Take a shot every time Simon says, “Blain Braze”.
    Good luck making it to page 3 before you’re upside down drunk.

    • @jphilb
      @jphilb 2 года назад +18

      I can't believe he said it more than once!

    • @GabrielHellborne
      @GabrielHellborne 2 года назад +8

      I thought Simon started yet another channel......

    • @bbycrts
      @bbycrts 2 года назад +9

      THANK YOU! I was worried I was imagining things when I heard that...and then heard it again.

    • @wmdkitty
      @wmdkitty 2 года назад +5

      Taking a hit, and yeah. I'm forking _blazed._

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад +1

      Can’t stop laughing at this one. 😂🤣

  • @TSmith-yy3cc
    @TSmith-yy3cc 2 года назад +21

    Simon: "DANNY! SHORTEN THE DAMN INTRO'S!"
    Also Simon: "Now, what can I juggle?!"

  • @bedazzledmisery6969
    @bedazzledmisery6969 2 года назад +440

    Simon: "I'm a pretty chill person."
    Also Simon: *screams at any random thing out of nowhere*

  • @mickaleneduczech8373
    @mickaleneduczech8373 2 года назад +7

    You are correct in your analysis of the Shawn Nelson situation when you said 'Just don't do meth'. There were some attempts to cast his troubles in a sympathetic light, ie losing his job and girlfriend. But it turned out he'd lost his job 'cause he'd stopped showing up, because he was doing meth. And his girlfriend left because he'd become physically abusive, 'cause he was doing meth.
    When the police shot him, he was attempting to take the tank over the freeway barrier into lanes that were packed with vehicles that were trapped because the traffic had been stopped ahead.

  • @mechtechpotato4249
    @mechtechpotato4249 2 года назад +1272

    Danny please make a script that is 90% intro.

    • @verofitzaqua214
      @verofitzaqua214 2 года назад +51

      No one that is 24000 words and 23900 are intro 🤣🤣

    • @mortal3256
      @mortal3256 2 года назад +12

      Yes

    • @andywilson5828
      @andywilson5828 2 года назад +68

      And don't hint to Simon what you've done

    • @TheCrowAngel
      @TheCrowAngel 2 года назад +48

      We need this. We can gather the money to pay Danny under the table to do so. Lmao

    • @thenovicewildcamper9192
      @thenovicewildcamper9192 2 года назад +29

      Think we are at about 55%intro atm
      FFS DANNY STOP FUCKING SLACKING 😤😒!!!

  • @sarahcoleman5269
    @sarahcoleman5269 2 года назад +20

    Two things I learned about Simon today:
    He can juggle. Poorly, but he can do it.
    And he goes absolutely rabid about the idea of people not getting paid for their work.

  • @PD-mi3qj
    @PD-mi3qj 2 года назад +330

    And now all I want is an Epic Blaze of Simon attempting to juggle random things from around the office, preceded by a 15 minute introduction from Danny about circuses, interspersed with the brilliant meming of Sam.

    • @debshaw680
      @debshaw680 2 года назад +8

      That would be perfection. 😆

    • @ClubsOG
      @ClubsOG 2 года назад +13

      I would love a BB video to start with Danny on screen, and we are all like wait who the fuck is this guy? OH MY FUCKING GOD ITS DANNY, and then Simon juggling in a basement (also interspersed with Sam’s brilliant memes)
      Oh how the tables could be turned 😈

    • @rjgaynor8
      @rjgaynor8 2 года назад +1

      I am game

    • @epkesel
      @epkesel 2 года назад +3

      I'd watch that god-level of shenanigannery

    • @GcTheHardstyler
      @GcTheHardstyler 2 года назад +1

      Genius.
      Peak blaze.

  • @Lena_K0711
    @Lena_K0711 Год назад +19

    I love watching Simon defend his feeling about dogs. It's like when my boyfriend eats an edible, then starts petting my arm then tells me he's not high. Unprovoked.

  • @kiwi_commander
    @kiwi_commander 2 года назад +141

    Simon: I am my own boss and life is good. I even provide housing for my employees.
    Danny: That's called feudalism!.
    Simon: WHERE IS MY NEXT SCRIPT DANNY?!

    • @Stunningandbrave
      @Stunningandbrave 2 года назад +1

      Danny's scripts come from Absolute Mad Lads on Count Dankula's channel.

  • @ignitionfrn2223
    @ignitionfrn2223 2 года назад +15

    10:15 - Chapter 1 - Driving over san diego
    19:15 - Mid roll ads
    22:00 - Chapter 2 - Checking in the travel lodge
    29:35 - Chapter 3 - The legend of the killdozer hero
    - Chapter 4 -
    - Chapter 5 -
    - Chapter 6 -

  • @dialaskisel5929
    @dialaskisel5929 2 года назад +271

    "When Total Knobs Lose Their Marbles"
    **Fact Boy rants and promises to kill dogs and begins juggling cereal boxes**
    That's the spirit! Lead by example!

  • @pr0xZen
    @pr0xZen 2 года назад +17

    I imagine anyone seeing Marvin's Google Maps travel route that day, may have been scrathing their heads seeing so many lines going straight through buildings. Until they turned on the telly.

  • @viviantong6396
    @viviantong6396 2 года назад +84

    I laughed so hard at Simon juggling that my dog woke up and was super offended
    I then told my dog that he is worth 10 Simon Whistlers.

    • @Tinaturtle191
      @Tinaturtle191 2 года назад +3

      🤣😂

    • @geekdivaherself
      @geekdivaherself 2 года назад +2

      I'll see you that dog and tell you that my bunny is worth 12! 15! 60! Y-yes my lucky numbers are multiples of 3 why do you ask?!?

    • @mildlydazed9608
      @mildlydazed9608 2 года назад +1

      @@geekdivaherself I’d tell my rabbit that but he’d probably kick my ass 😂

    • @geekdivaherself
      @geekdivaherself 2 года назад +2

      @@mildlydazed9608 Three times, yes he would!

    • @MashMonster69
      @MashMonster69 2 года назад +1

      I'll give you 8 Simon whistlers for the dog.

  • @chillcannongames5758
    @chillcannongames5758 2 года назад +5

    Sam is doing an incredible job. He keeps doing references that are both obscure but very memorable if you seen where it comes from. Ackmed was a boss play.

  • @stevewindsor3858
    @stevewindsor3858 2 года назад +294

    Ah yes. 5 minutes in and Simons infamous “I don’t hate dogs, I would just shoot them over people” rant comes out. This is gonna be a spicy one.

    • @ominous-omnipresent-they
      @ominous-omnipresent-they 2 года назад +7

      And eat them, depending on how dire the situation may be.

    • @ericstromberg9608
      @ericstromberg9608 2 года назад +28

      "Dogs are a lower life form" is a pretty dubious argument to advance.

    • @Jezus42
      @Jezus42 2 года назад +9

      I was always taught everything with a bellybutton is deserving of love and respect. Also people are primates no different than any other really.

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад +9

      I mean, I'd save my dogs before Simon... *allegedly* ... but he keeps saying #blainbraze, and called #SaltBae "the guy with the thing", so...

    • @stevewindsor3858
      @stevewindsor3858 2 года назад +7

      @@anamkarajoy I think part of the charm is how clueless he is about basic things. Yet knows About judge Judy. His basis is also on random people/dogs. I think he isn’t trying to bring personal sentiment into it.

  • @jcurses
    @jcurses 2 года назад +7

    I absolutely loved the ADD moment Simon shared.
    Also, congratulations on the new child!

  • @Infamouslbx
    @Infamouslbx 2 года назад +218

    8 minutes in, intro is still going, Simon is now juggling cereal boxes, and has stated he'd kill dogs. Today is going to be a great day.

    • @Lunch2391
      @Lunch2391 2 года назад +17

      must be his new sleeping schedule due to the new baby
      sleep deprivation can do funny things to brains

    • @bedlamkids4845
      @bedlamkids4845 2 года назад +3

      ALL HAIL ME!!!

    • @jessegaspard
      @jessegaspard 2 года назад

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @jeffsorrows
      @jeffsorrows 2 года назад +12

      Other youtubers struggling to make 10 minutes and 9 seconds of conent: 😭
      Danny with the intros: Hold my beer. 😏

    • @amandajones661
      @amandajones661 2 года назад

      😅😅😅😅

  • @Zevonfan524
    @Zevonfan524 Год назад +3

    I love that it is impossible to explain this channel to anyone without sounding absolutely insane.

  • @amandajones661
    @amandajones661 2 года назад +63

    Simon "I just bought a house" / Simon's wife "Now we can get a dog" / Simon "Nooooo" 😅😅😅

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  2 года назад +63

      She wanted a dog, I eventually caved, and since then I have worn her down on the dogs name...
      The dog will be called Jean-Luc.
      I am happy about this.

    • @m4taylor780
      @m4taylor780 2 года назад +2

      @@brainblaze6526 choose between jean-luc or your career

    • @5777Whatup
      @5777Whatup 2 года назад

      @@m4taylor780 does this mean like good luck or something

    • @m4taylor780
      @m4taylor780 2 года назад

      @@5777Whatup he said he wouldn't choose between a dog or his kid. So I changed the tactic

    • @garbuz3324
      @garbuz3324 2 года назад +2

      @@brainblaze6526 Are you gonna shave him bald? You know, be a proper fanboy :P

  • @wyattdemotte7920
    @wyattdemotte7920 2 года назад +5

    Danny: "Once I send it off and they decide not to pay me, then it's not like I can reverse time and get that work back."
    Simon: "Uhh yes you can, it's called DCMA..... They'll pay you sharpishly quick"

  • @Leidyloveslibros
    @Leidyloveslibros 2 года назад +106

    The chaos of Brain Blaze makes it my absolute all time favorite Simon channel. I didn’t watch it for a while because I don’t care about business. So I thought.. I’m so glad I ventured over. Stay chaotic fact boy ❤️

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  2 года назад +30

      legend. Welcome back.

    • @Pennywise-nx4jz
      @Pennywise-nx4jz 2 года назад +9

      Oh please. After about the first dozen videos this channel has had nothing to do with business

    • @IKMcGwee
      @IKMcGwee 2 года назад +6

      I tried to get my friends to watch and had to start with "Its called Business Blaze but dont worry its not about business he just etc etc"

    • @geekdivaherself
      @geekdivaherself 2 года назад +1

      How far into Business Blaze did Simon start blazing at full Brain Blaze speed?
      ... allegedly...

  • @benshaw9951
    @benshaw9951 2 года назад +6

    That sausage sandwhich meme nearly made me choke on a pringle. Well played

  • @christinebenson518
    @christinebenson518 2 года назад +59

    I remember when Blaze videos were under 30 minutes. I definitely think the longer the better.
    Never stop Danny.

    • @JanStrojil
      @JanStrojil 2 года назад +1

      I did not notice it was 40 minutes until I read your comment. Love the randomness and absurdity, this is Simon’s best channel.

    • @Stunningandbrave
      @Stunningandbrave 2 года назад +1

      It's easy to combine a couple "Absolute Madlads" scripts from Count Dankula into a long video....

  • @kevinnaber790
    @kevinnaber790 2 года назад +1

    In most motels like Travelodge the utility room is directly adjacent to the lobby, so when he raised the bucket of the digger into the ceiling, he was essentially ripping out the electric and data for every room in the building as well as any security (CCTV, fire alarm, door access). From what appears to be a 3 story motel, I’m surprised that the damage wasn’t higher. As for the Killdozer, he purchased a shop at auction without doing due diligence as to zoning and utilities then succumbed to emotional problems. Also, after the concrete plant was built, the cost of connecting to public water and sewer was significantly reduced so he could have continued with his muffler and welding company. As for access, arial photos and satellite images show that his shop had a shared access road with the concrete plant, just no evident signage.

  • @bigtguitars7312
    @bigtguitars7312 2 года назад +90

    The prevailing belief here in Rotherham is that Danny is your boss Simon

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад +2

      Wouldn't he require him to learn how to properly pronounce it? Or does Danny prefer to keep his masterdom low-key?

    • @bigtguitars7312
      @bigtguitars7312 2 года назад +5

      @@anamkarajoy definately low key I drank in the same pubs for 20 years and have friends in common but we never spoke until he moved away and became a RUclips megastar

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад

      @@bigtguitars7312 I think he's delightful.

    • @bigtguitars7312
      @bigtguitars7312 2 года назад +1

      Everyone in Rotherham’s an artist

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад

      @@bigtguitars7312 And as clever and snarky as our beloved Danny?

  • @matthawkins3584
    @matthawkins3584 2 года назад +5

    Simon going on a random juggling spree was one of the funniest things I've ever seen on the Blaze.

  • @DouglasParkinson
    @DouglasParkinson 2 года назад +78

    There is so much more to the Killdozer story that got glossed over, like how the armour was two sheets of thick steel with concrete poured between. The local police had nothing that could damage it.
    If you haven't already, it is definitely a subject for one of the other channels.

    • @jaymzx0
      @jaymzx0 2 года назад +6

      Like Sideprojects 😁

    • @cpuwizard9225
      @cpuwizard9225 2 года назад +5

      @@jaymzx0 speaking of side projects, I have a Komatsu that I need a little help with.

    • @DJSockmonkeyMusic
      @DJSockmonkeyMusic 2 года назад +1

      True Crime Loser has a pretty good video about Killdozer, although there aren't any visuals to go with it, he just tells the story to the camera.

    • @joshpaulson9607
      @joshpaulson9607 2 года назад +7

      Count Dankula

    • @psychoMAULER
      @psychoMAULER 2 года назад +1

      There was a documentary on Netflix about it not to long ago.

  • @rosiehawtrey
    @rosiehawtrey 2 года назад +4

    What we call a significant emotional incident...
    And as for hospitals - my local one murdered my grandmother by giving her morphine for flu (she was allergic) and then threatened the nurse with being sacked and blackballed if she told the truth at the inquiry.
    Thank you so much Colchester General Shithole.

  • @doctorlolchicken7478
    @doctorlolchicken7478 2 года назад +58

    Simon: “Who has time to cook a full meal from scratch any more?”
    Me, cooking a full meal from scratch while listening: “WTF did I do?”

  • @CarlSteevens
    @CarlSteevens 2 года назад +3

    "accurate title" 8 minutes in and a total knob looses his marbles and starts to juggle

  • @PhilosoShysGameChannel
    @PhilosoShysGameChannel 2 года назад +64

    It's official... Simon has started being a cannibal. He's braising Blains

    • @nibblitman
      @nibblitman 2 года назад +8

      But only Blains so at least Danny is safe.

    • @Dubmaster3
      @Dubmaster3 2 года назад +3

      Nothing better than a good brazed Blain. Delicious.

    • @PhilosoShysGameChannel
      @PhilosoShysGameChannel 2 года назад +2

      @@nibblitman well, thank goodness for that!

    • @PhilosoShysGameChannel
      @PhilosoShysGameChannel 2 года назад +2

      @@Dubmaster3 what IS the correct way to prepare brains? XD

    • @Dubmaster3
      @Dubmaster3 2 года назад +5

      @@PhilosoShysGameChannel wouldn't know, I am not a zombie. But if you mean Blains then brazing them it is.

  • @kaldo_kaldo
    @kaldo_kaldo 11 месяцев назад +1

    25:47 This tangent about writing commissions and Simon teaching Danny how to get his money if someone doesn't pay him is so wholesome.

  • @GcTheHardstyler
    @GcTheHardstyler 2 года назад +34

    Absolutely off the rails, Blaze Boy just started juggling... like wtf is even happening 🤣

    • @slcpunk2740
      @slcpunk2740 2 года назад +2

      Juggling cereal boxes too ... Wtf indeed!

    • @GcTheHardstyler
      @GcTheHardstyler 2 года назад

      I was also impressed he had the boxes going as long as he did 🤣

  • @laurelloaf
    @laurelloaf 2 года назад +2

    My favorite episode date. Love the absolute chaos mixed with the genuine advice to Danny about getting paid fairly. Also, congrats Fact Boy on baby #2 and your house!!

  • @Joe_Potts
    @Joe_Potts 2 года назад +25

    "...the killdozer destroyed a playground, various trees..."
    NOT THE TREES
    ANYTHING BUT THE TREES

  • @greysonstrachan8395
    @greysonstrachan8395 2 года назад +3

    Thank you so much for making this video! This is exactly what I was thinking of when I suggested it, not a bloodbath or video all about catastrophe.

  • @katieskarlette
    @katieskarlette 2 года назад +36

    Most people when announcing the birth of their child: ~give date/time of birth, gender, weight, length, name, etc.~
    Simon when announcing the birth of his child: ~barely mentions new baby and proceeds to randomly juggle cereal boxes~

    • @SassyGirl822006
      @SassyGirl822006 2 года назад +8

      To be fair, telling the entire internet the time/date and full name of your child could be dangerous. Not everyone out here is good. This is the guy who also does the Casual Criminalist channel, he's going to trust random strangers very much.

    • @katieskarlette
      @katieskarlette 2 года назад +2

      @@SassyGirl822006 I almost included that as a disclaimer but the dose of dark reality kind of killed the joke. :p

  • @meridien52681
    @meridien52681 2 года назад +1

    Congratulations on your new son/daughter...it was so cool listening to you enjoying how sweet your little daughter is. Awwww.....

  • @WDCallahan
    @WDCallahan 2 года назад +52

    I was legitimately impressed when he juggled the magic spoon boxes. I did not think that was going to work out!

    • @vickiewallace415
      @vickiewallace415 2 года назад +3

      I prefer the juggling to the slurping while doing ad copy! I'm sure hello fresh was saying...juggle OUR PRODUCT SIMON!!!

  • @trashboat2708
    @trashboat2708 8 месяцев назад +2

    New channel!
    50% intro / 50% rant
    While juggling!
    😂❤😂❤

  • @banarot
    @banarot 2 года назад +45

    Oh God yess... The excellently written script, the perfectly executed memes, the five minutes interludes into Simons life. Its like coming home to a warm fire. Its brainblaze, baby!

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад +3

      Or *”Blain Braze”,* according to this episode. 🤷🏻‍♀️
      I get a kick out of it when-after a random tangent he’s having all on his own, alone in his studio/office-he suddenly asks why *”we”* are talking about something so unrelated and off point.
      *Viewers of video he recorded days or weeks ago:* “Umm… sorry for distracting you?” 😅

  • @WildeFyre69
    @WildeFyre69 2 года назад +2

    OMG Simon! You actually were able to juggle cereal boxes _and_ include a plug for your sponsor at the same time! Amazing!

  • @iainballas
    @iainballas 2 года назад +48

    Watching simon juggle magic spoon is the best promotion for it I've ever seen.

    • @Lunch2391
      @Lunch2391 2 года назад +2

      And he doesn't even get paid to do it!

    • @rodepet
      @rodepet 2 года назад +1

      Remember when he rubbed it on his head?

    • @0mn1vore
      @0mn1vore 2 года назад

      @@Lunch2391 - Yeah, they weren't even sponsoring this one. :-) He's explained that he can't get Hello Fresh in Europe, so one of his writers on another channel tried it for him and reported back.

    • @0mn1vore
      @0mn1vore 2 года назад +1

      @@rodepet - Okay, maybe it's a good thing he can't get Hello Fresh in Europe...

    • @Lunch2391
      @Lunch2391 2 года назад +2

      Hello Fresh is in Europe now
      he wouldn't tell a story about how he cooks hello fresh if doesn't do it
      but when they started sponsoring RUclipsrs they weren't available in Europe yet

  • @SiriumDivision
    @SiriumDivision 2 года назад +1

    Yo that juggling section had me slayed. I had to pause to cry out my laughter before I could watch the rest. Prime editing.

  • @SMPTEColorBars
    @SMPTEColorBars 2 года назад +62

    Because of time constraints, I’m going to be watching this in installments. I’m 10 minutes in. I busted out laughing NUMEROUS times already! 😂🤣😂 Can’t wait to see the rest!

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  2 года назад +12

      :)

    • @theenzoferrari458
      @theenzoferrari458 2 года назад +8

      For the low low price of 4 installments of 19.99$ you can watch this entire video at once.

  • @stephanredding3558
    @stephanredding3558 2 года назад +1

    I love all your channels because I'm a super nerd but this channel is my favorite because of your banter especially about Danny during these videos. Cracks me up every time

  • @StevenLockey
    @StevenLockey 2 года назад +32

    Simon: Danny's intros are too long
    Also Simon: Extends the intro by 5 minutes juggling

  • @morgangallowglass8668
    @morgangallowglass8668 2 года назад +2

    Congrats on the new kid! Looks like our favorite Fact Boy is finally going mental and it only makes it all better!

  • @clem719
    @clem719 2 года назад +50

    Simon: “I used to be really good at juggling things”
    Now you’re really good at juggling channels

  • @erkdoc5
    @erkdoc5 2 года назад +2

    Damn Simon sounds like a surprisingly good employer for someone who keeps a basement worker farm. Getting angry over someone not getting paid, and even teaching his staff and everyone how to legally get to people who don't pay them if they work somewhere else.

  • @alexandershin413
    @alexandershin413 2 года назад +53

    Fact Boy you have once again graced us with a Brain Blaze. Thank You. However we require the Korea Cut
    Edit: while nothing will replace the Korea Cut Fact Boy discussing the killdozer is acceptable

    • @Kiefsti
      @Kiefsti 2 года назад +3

      Korea cut. Please. 🙏

    • @stopyourshit1641
      @stopyourshit1641 2 года назад +2

      Blaine Braze

    • @rattyratstuff7125
      @rattyratstuff7125 2 года назад +6

      killdozer is americas last hero

    • @rattyratstuff7125
      @rattyratstuff7125 2 года назад +5

      killed zero. utterly destroyed city gov buildings that had targeted him and his families business literally the day they moved there thus destroying their investments then blatantly lying in court about why he did what he did

    • @CrazyBear65
      @CrazyBear65 2 года назад +1

      We all need to build our own killdozers and go smash Wall Street. Take all the unearned and undeserved wealth away from the 1% and watch them squirm like fishing worms.

  • @hypocriticalcritic6915
    @hypocriticalcritic6915 2 года назад +1

    Simon: Want to see me juggle?
    Me: I have never wanted anything more in my life.

  • @mikeselvage380
    @mikeselvage380 2 года назад +19

    "Blain Braze" 🤣 Love you and Danny!

  • @Doskious
    @Doskious Год назад

    Boss: "Why were you late?" Me: "A complex combination of reasons that seem relevant to me, but that will be utterly meaningless to you. Suffice it to say that while I always make an effort to be on time, in this instance I was unsuccessful. Let's move on, shall we?"

  • @rogueviking9268
    @rogueviking9268 2 года назад +35

    Damn, I'm so early Danny's tears are still fresh... #FlogDannyForLongerIntros

  • @MinistryOfMagic_DoM
    @MinistryOfMagic_DoM 2 года назад +2

    Omg the random "Simon Juggles Shit in His Office" segment is the fucking best! That's the stuff we come for lol.

  • @Kenzie.Avrahm.Fraser.Gelbart
    @Kenzie.Avrahm.Fraser.Gelbart 2 года назад +42

    Simon, you must make a channel to explain how you are so functional, because even your moderately sized brain can clearly organize and do more than most of us. Basement dwellers, go!

  • @mandalorian1797
    @mandalorian1797 2 года назад +1

    Watching Simon juggle is why I watch business blaze, something I didn't know I needed in my life

  • @brianwoodbridge88
    @brianwoodbridge88 2 года назад +15

    It took me a whole 10 minutes into the video to realize that the knob losing his marbles in the title isn't Simon 🤣 keep it up fact boy 😁

  • @robertlogan5354
    @robertlogan5354 5 месяцев назад +1

    seeing simon juggle boxes of cereal was worth the price of admission.

  • @MushroomHedgehog
    @MushroomHedgehog 2 года назад +24

    Honestly giving this a thumbs up just because Rampage is an underappreciated arcade giant that should be on the same pedestal as games like Pac-Man and Donkey Kong.

    • @anamkarajoy
      @anamkarajoy 2 года назад +1

      Okay, but George or Lizzie? 🤔

    • @CrazyBear65
      @CrazyBear65 2 года назад

      Big monkey! Big Lizard! Big blue wolf! Leave The Rock out of it. I just wanna fuck shit up.

  • @D1rk266
    @D1rk266 2 года назад +2

    i loved it when Simon completely lost the plot and started juggling things XD

  • @lil131313
    @lil131313 2 года назад +8

    The big G "sorry to be late, I was making coffee *sips*"
    Simon "Yes daddy, as you wish."

  • @LettersfromUkraine
    @LettersfromUkraine 2 года назад +1

    Simon is the best employer... Tells his employees how they can file a dcma takedown against him. 😆

  • @troyserdynski4030
    @troyserdynski4030 2 года назад +24

    I'm a simple 'Murrican. I see killdozer in the thumbnail, and I watch as Simon learns of a truly great American Legend. Long live Killdozer!

  • @brendansmith9677
    @brendansmith9677 2 года назад +1

    From what I understand tanks are actually fairly easy to drive. Same as a car, but with 2 levers in the place of a steering wheel. Pulling the left lever causes you to turn left, right lever to go right. The levers just replace the wheel though. You still need to manage the accelerator and whatnot

  • @Serenity_yt
    @Serenity_yt 2 года назад +24

    Anyone else for a name change to Blaine Braize? (Simon seems to like it already said it two times within a few sec)It just incorporates the absolute madness so well and the general journey. It started out normal and then came Blaze Boy step by step to make this master piece. No just me oh well I tried.

  • @johngavin2570
    @johngavin2570 2 года назад

    "I was late making coffee"
    "UNACCEPTABLE"
    "But it was for you..."
    "Oh"

  • @twocvbloke
    @twocvbloke 2 года назад +10

    I think the Travelodge guy was probably the best one, for just £600, the company could have stopped all that destruction and his prison sentence from happening, but nope, they chose the expensive route instead...

  • @dankrauz1036
    @dankrauz1036 2 года назад +1

    The magic spoon juggling made my abs hurt from laughing. Legend Simon.

  • @piparalegal2019
    @piparalegal2019 2 года назад +26

    Congrats on the new little one!

  • @JerryEricsson
    @JerryEricsson 2 года назад

    As you read this, it sort of shocked me upright in my recliner. You see, I was born in South Dakota in 1951, and I have driven through Colorado many times in my 71 years on this big blue marble. I have done the things he did, I have seen the things he saw, and when I get pissed off, the training I had in the US Army before going over to fight in the Jungles of Vietnam surface, the fighting blood that developed in that little police action surface as well, but luckily the 24 years I spent as a police officer also surface and like a good ant-acid after a meal of brats and German Potato Salad at "The Pub" on Dyer Street in El Paso quell my anger and save the surrounding folks from such things as this fellow did. Nature or Nurture? Who the hell knows?? GO MAN GO!

  • @amandajones661
    @amandajones661 2 года назад +7

    I love Simon teaching people about DCMA. Photographers get screwed all the time because they don't know this.

    • @Stunningandbrave
      @Stunningandbrave 2 года назад

      DMCA? I love big RUclipsrs ripping off content, near verbatim, from smaller RUclipsrs like Count Dankula's coverage of these exact events.

  • @tmanknoll9702
    @tmanknoll9702 Год назад +1

    I think the killdozer guy will always be my favorite folk hero!

  • @tired1923
    @tired1923 2 года назад +4

    Simon: Danny shorten your intros the videos are too long!
    Also Simon: * practices juggling cereal boxes *

  • @magildachunks
    @magildachunks 2 года назад +1

    The whole "Late for Work" diatribe about excuses: I felt that.
    I constantly tell my employees half the shit they give me are not an excuse.
    It's a reason you are late or you messed something up, but it's not an excuse.

  • @andrewsisson6536
    @andrewsisson6536 2 года назад +5

    Simon:

  • @Kari.F.
    @Kari.F. 2 года назад +1

    Congrats with the expansion of your family, Simon! I hope your little princess enjoys being a big sister already.

  • @abefroman9110
    @abefroman9110 2 года назад +37

    I see the bionic collar bone is working gloriously. I could watch Nomis try to juggle items for hours on end. You should take requests on items to see you juggle in future viddys

    • @RHCole
      @RHCole 2 года назад +2

      The skull and two solo cups.

    • @j-bob_oreo
      @j-bob_oreo 2 года назад +2

      abe froman ? the abe froman ? the sausage king of chicago abe froman ?

    • @abefroman9110
      @abefroman9110 2 года назад

      @@j-bob_oreo the very same...

    • @midnightrambler8866
      @midnightrambler8866 2 года назад +1

      Nomis! Too funny!

  • @Kaiserland111
    @Kaiserland111 2 года назад +1

    Another video on my favorite Factboi channel. My day has been made! Love ya, Simon, Sam, and Danny. You guys are LEGEND! Especially Sam, he freaking killed it on this one!!!! Well, the awesome police legend killed the tank drive. Man I love my country.

  • @asentex9862
    @asentex9862 2 года назад +8

    Simon would absolutely slay at trivia due to all his random knowledge.

    • @thecrowcook
      @thecrowcook 2 года назад +3

      He never remembers any of the details, there would be a question and he’d say “HEY! I did a 5 hour special on that guy, don’t temper a damn thing about him though”

    • @asentex9862
      @asentex9862 2 года назад

      @@thecrowcook so true

  • @matthewwhite2155
    @matthewwhite2155 2 года назад +1

    Congratulations on your new arrival and your new home, Simon!

  • @aprilkurtz1589
    @aprilkurtz1589 2 года назад +15

    Simon, our cops are "shoot first, ask questions later" horrible. Sam, once again, your sound effects and memes are perfect. Also, I can vouch for Hello Fresh. They're excellent.

    • @Jack-Tactical
      @Jack-Tactical 2 года назад +1

      Nah, when you steal a tank you should probably expect lethal force in response.

  • @senditsimon4913
    @senditsimon4913 Год назад

    Simon, Simon here...😐 anywho... Granby, Colorado is indeed VERY small. Even today, this picturesque town nestled against the Never Summer Mountains and bordering breathtaking Rocky Mountain National Park is the kind of place where it's not hard to know just about everyone in town. Everyone that LIVES there, anyway. The problem is, as this absolutely stunning area is highly desirable real estate to out of town interests, including ski and resort concerns, the town council and planners are often, correctly, suspected of caring more about the foreign interests, ( and their money) inundating the county than the hardscrabble locals that have been carving a living out of the mighty Rocky mountains for generations.
    Even today, Marvin is admired as a man that embodied the spirit of the area.

  • @obnoxious-cackle
    @obnoxious-cackle 2 года назад +11

    28:21 We have Motel 6 here in America and it’s hella sketchy. Y’all should do a video on crazy Motel 6 stories at some point. There’s lots of content there, I’m sure.

    • @rattyratstuff7125
      @rattyratstuff7125 2 года назад +1

      fucking walked in and cockroaches all over the walls. not even joking. we lit it up and got the fuck outta there

    • @MusicKttn
      @MusicKttn 2 года назад

      Yeah... In more sketchy areas, a lot of drug dens and suicides are associated with Motel 6s. I don't get why it's become a thing with this particular chain, but it's really sad. :/

    • @wrmlm37
      @wrmlm37 2 года назад

      @@MusicKttn...because its SUPER cheap and people live there. The one near where I lived at one time, was a "residence" hotel😳. People died there. Children lived there😳

  • @Foxiz
    @Foxiz Год назад

    I don't know why, but I actually broke out in laughter at the "BlainBraze".
    That rarely happens, but that one fit just right 😂

  • @berandol88
    @berandol88 2 года назад +10

    Less than 8 minutes in and Simon has gone totally of the rails! I love it!

  • @staytuned2L337
    @staytuned2L337 2 года назад

    "Hey, Danno. Could you like...shorten the intros maybe?"
    *watches simon tangent and juggle for 7 of 9 minutes* 😂

  • @Opethjunky613
    @Opethjunky613 2 года назад +6

    Simon's wife is like "COOK FOR ME FACT BOY!"

  • @Kjt9653
    @Kjt9653 Год назад

    "Do you think we can juggle boxes of magic spoon??"
    I. Love. This. Channel. Dont ever change Simon.

  • @p.l.g3190
    @p.l.g3190 2 года назад +12

    I remember the tank theft. It was quite amazing to watch on TV. Not knowing anything about the back story, I had to reluctantly admire the man's creativity in stealing a tank and taking it for a joyride. At least it was not yet another televised car chase. Then I saw how he was aiming at other people's cars, and that took away any admiration. Then I learned he wound up being shot, which was awful. Now, learning how tragic and messed-up he was, I see the situation as it was: terribly sad.

    • @Loralanthalas
      @Loralanthalas Год назад

      He was a complete and total jerk who kept going back on his word and broke his own promises repeatedly. Then he just started trying to harm EVERYONE. All around a totally selfish person who's self-importance was completely overblown.

  • @cadillacmonte
    @cadillacmonte 2 года назад +1

    Danny and Collin should have a script off as a holiday special! That’d be hella dope

  • @amandajones661
    @amandajones661 2 года назад +13

    I'm so excited to watch Simon "grow up" with his kids and hear stories from year to year. 😃

  • @jdb47games
    @jdb47games 2 года назад

    15:43 '...at least, not the way he intended' haha!

  • @Persianbookworm
    @Persianbookworm 2 года назад +4

    I really like the ADHD tangents, they're my favourite part of business/brain blaze