Dealing with a self harmer - What NOT to do 2

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  • Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024

Комментарии • 53

  • @katelynmason9179
    @katelynmason9179 4 года назад +49

    Throwing away my tools by myself was the biggest part of healing for me

  • @lavender_mjc
    @lavender_mjc 3 года назад +31

    My dad took away my tools yesterday, and I’ve been abnormally anxious all day- So I agree, taking away the tools is just working against the recovery process

  • @Ruiluvsmakeup
    @Ruiluvsmakeup 5 лет назад +89

    Whenever i self harmed and needed stiches or tride suicide my mom would refuse to take me to a hospital because she said it was my problem

  • @alix5764
    @alix5764 2 года назад +8

    The thing is I don't understand the people that have self harmed themselves acting like it's something that you can fix overnight. Like they clearly don't remember how it was like for them.

  • @Listenclearly1979
    @Listenclearly1979 3 года назад +19

    Taking away tools( personally speaking) causes anxiety, frustration and anger.
    Has anyone else experienced this?

    • @spicy.waffles13
      @spicy.waffles13 3 года назад +5

      even when i’m clean i just feel ‘safer’ with them around.

  • @michaelaforce2303
    @michaelaforce2303 4 года назад +24

    When I told my sister that I was self harming she found this video. Thank you

  • @katelynmason9179
    @katelynmason9179 4 года назад +61

    For me the biggest trigger was my mom bringing it up every day and asking to see my arms.

  • @idonthaveanameyet6454
    @idonthaveanameyet6454 3 года назад +15

    My therapist forced my mom to come into my room and force me to give my tool to her so she could throw it away. Since then I have been lying because I don’t want them to take away my tools again😕

  • @kadyncornell3280
    @kadyncornell3280 5 лет назад +36

    I self harm. My parents know I used to and they have never done body checks or taken me to a doctor which always makes me think they don't care

    • @insertmeme1531
      @insertmeme1531 5 лет назад +17

      Kadyn Cornell Same issue, I just told them that "I will never do it again" and they don't really cared after that. I even told one of my friend that I self-harm, he told me that he already knew and didn't even tried to help me or anything. So I feel you buddy.

    • @kadyncornell3280
      @kadyncornell3280 5 лет назад +8

      @@insertmeme1531 yea whenever they do do body checks they only check my wrist and only like a couple days after it happened then never again until they find out again then the cycle repeats

    • @junexxmoon1985
      @junexxmoon1985 3 года назад +6

      My parents don't do body checks or check for tools or anything. But not because they don't care, they don't do it because they care. I'm not ready to show my wounds/scars to them yet and they respect that. They sometimes ask if I self-harmed that week, if I feel the urge to self-harm at that moment or if my wounds are so bad that they have to be stitched or something, but they don't ask 24/7. I am mostly answering honestly.
      I often just want to deal with it alone, so my parents don't force me to anything. But I do know they care really much and of course they make sure I get treatment so that I'll stop one day.

    • @ithinkimtrying3322
      @ithinkimtrying3322 3 года назад +5

      when my mom found out the second time (she thought i stopped after the first time she found out) all she did was threaten to take me to a therapist

    • @bigfat6172
      @bigfat6172 2 года назад +2

      I personally hate body checks, yet it still feels like they don't care because they won't let me see a professional

  • @izabellaspeed9055
    @izabellaspeed9055 5 лет назад +35

    its nice to have someone who understands... thank you

  • @theextrovertedintrovert1295
    @theextrovertedintrovert1295 3 года назад +21

    When I was in 8th grade, I had a friend that self harmed. She got the help she needed because I told my mom and my mom got the right people involved. It's been five years, and I no longer know that friend anymore. I often wonder where she must be now, and if her home situation has gotten better.
    I never understood why she did it, or how anyone could do that to themselves. Not until I began doing it too. Finding your channel has helped me greatly. Thank you! I always work to clarify my emotions and my thoughts within myself, but since I began cutting, I haven't been able to understand it to my liking. So thank you for answering all the right questions!

  • @emme9606
    @emme9606 3 года назад +14

    Thank you for clarifying that not all forms of authority are the right people to tell. Sometimes parents are not who you go to first!!
    I think some people assume telling their parents or a teacher is the right way to go, when in reality just like with any other fragile and personal situation, it is best to tell someone who you know will come into the situation to do nothing but help.

  • @XxSad_boiUwUxX
    @XxSad_boiUwUxX 2 года назад +6

    I’m 3 years late, but PERSONALLY speaking, this is my take.
    1. I disagree with that somewhat. I disagree only in the sense that if someone is not in immediate danger of serious injury and seriously it would frick them up to have their parents know, then you shouldn’t tell. Personally, I think it would be really bad if my parents found out at the time being. The same can be said for other minors in environments where they can’t open up. However, someone who is in serious need of help or in a safe environment somehow, definitely speak up.
    2. I completely agree with everything said. Completely. But to add, tell someone that is they need to get away from the tools as they recover, they will be safe with you.
    3. I agree with this entirely. The yelling and anger and stress was so much to deal with that I couldn’t handle it.
    4. This is something I also agree with entirely and really hits on a personal level.

  • @simplymoonvideoedits1570
    @simplymoonvideoedits1570 5 лет назад +57

    ive suffered with self harm for nilly 4 years now and my mum still dose most of nots

  • @bobbel3474
    @bobbel3474 4 года назад +12

    I have selfharmed in the past and once i was at a the doctor to check My bloodsugar, but he accedentally saw my scars and told my mom straight away. After that i GOT so much Worse and IT fucked up the relasionship betjene me and My mom. I just wish he would have talked to me first instead for just telling My mom

  • @rosellastar468
    @rosellastar468 3 года назад +8

    Definitely agree with number 2. When my sister did this I felt all freedom and choice taken away I felt no longer in control and ended finding harsher ways because things were so hard to deal with that because I was no longer in control. This I know is really bad and it’s better to work with them since compared to recently on my birthday when I wanted to make a day without I worked with my friends I felt in safe hands and in control and made it and so far have made a week clean

  • @kadyncornell3280
    @kadyncornell3280 5 лет назад +42

    Whenever my "friend" sees my scars she always slapped them and one time she did it so hard she opened some and I had to wait 30 min till class ended it was terrible

    • @ur_loved_xx2103
      @ur_loved_xx2103 3 года назад +13

      Why would they do that?? Its awful! I'm so sorry for you both...

    • @-chiakinanami-3903
      @-chiakinanami-3903 3 года назад +5

      Wtf- why? That sounds painful I can’t even put bactine on mine with out it hurting like hell

    • @junexxmoon1985
      @junexxmoon1985 3 года назад +8

      Why would someone slap someone's SH scars/wounds? That's terrible and wrong, don't let anyone do that to you!

    • @lisamessenger3713
      @lisamessenger3713 Год назад

      That's a frenemy

  • @swaggyghoulies2690
    @swaggyghoulies2690 5 лет назад +34

    i LOVE your accent

  • @awildroappears9830
    @awildroappears9830 3 года назад +12

    "when you're encountering a self-harmer" (pokemon wild battle theme starts playing)

  • @SrtaWoods-fy9eq
    @SrtaWoods-fy9eq 5 лет назад +40

    i love the fact that you're french, it makes this video easier to understand because i'm Spanish and even tho i'm a fluent speaker its hard xD thank you for all of your videos

  • @cosmicfelinesas5191
    @cosmicfelinesas5191 5 лет назад +20

    I suffered and my mum kept taking my tools and it got that bad and she had taken things that I started with a pencil sharpener blade

  • @-chiakinanami-3903
    @-chiakinanami-3903 3 года назад +7

    I bought sensory toys so instead of self harm I can fidget with those and I hope it will help but idk since they aren’t here yet

  • @victoriageren5513
    @victoriageren5513 3 года назад +3

    I have a hard time with the threatening, my boyfriend knows I used to self harm and have just started really recovering well and he has threatened to break up with me if I relapse. To be honest it makes it harder to avoid it because when it crosses my mind I worry about it more because I'm scared to lose him

  • @octopusfood5643
    @octopusfood5643 5 лет назад +10

    Your accent is beautiful! X

  • @kirap4476
    @kirap4476 3 года назад +2

    That was a really cute introduction!!! Love your accent 😍

  • @Cole-kw4dm
    @Cole-kw4dm 3 года назад +5

    I know this is an old video, but it seems like a good one to ask this question. I self-harm, but I have not been suicidal since maybe September (It is currently January as I’m writing this). I am in a long-distance relationship with my girlfriend, who has also been my best friend for four years. I don’t want to over share her story, that’s not my place, but I really think she needs help right now, telling her parents is not an option, and since she’s far away I can’t tell any other adults who can help, and I don’t know how to help her right now. Does anyone have advice? I know I’m not gonna magically fix her problems, but I want to do what I can.

  • @dulcietorrans
    @dulcietorrans 5 лет назад +20

    apropos ich lieb dieses Video - viel danke!!!1

  • @frnkieroandthechemicalroma9370
    @frnkieroandthechemicalroma9370 3 года назад +3

    your accent is beautiful

  • @manonbonnot8606
    @manonbonnot8606 5 лет назад +8

    Fait une vidéo en français stp

  • @dulcietorrans
    @dulcietorrans 5 лет назад +10

    sprichst du Deutsch, oder Französisch?

  • @devilhorndoodles9487
    @devilhorndoodles9487 4 года назад +14

    Nobody knows and it's so hot.

    • @emilyuwuowo2131
      @emilyuwuowo2131 4 года назад +7

      Wdym it’s hot silly 😂

    • @Jeff-fp8qx
      @Jeff-fp8qx 3 года назад +8

      In summer it gets hot when we need to cover the cuts QwQ