I love how open minded and reflective you are. You ask yourself the hard questions and are empathetic. It's so good to be cognitive. As a person who identifies with LGBTQ, I appreciate anyone who can be open minded. We all keep learning.
I think gay guys should have straight friends like you. You can't catch gay by being in the same room with someone (or more) who is gay. It's not like the flu. 😄 You handled it well.
hah, now I'm imagining all those doctor's notes: Please excuse Billy for being absent because caught the straightness cooties." "Please excuse Billy for being out with the gay cooties." "Please excuse Billy. He's been very confused lately, what with the gay cooties and the straight cooties. We are just glad he's stopped humping the furniture!"
I think you handled it really well, but why do straight dudes usually think that gay dudes will come on to them. It's almost like an insult. gay dudes have self control and discipline too they don't try to get with every guy in sight
Yeah that's cool I respect that. Love your attitude about it though because that guy could've had a roommate that handled it terribly. I actually ship in Apr and your videos have helped me a lot on what to expect. Thanks a lot bro
@@brandonjablasone7544 If the “straight” guy gave into the gay act… trust it wasn’t forced he wanted to try it! You don’t do stuff unwillingly w/ outa gun to yo head
@@brandonjablasone7544 Its not force, more give the straight dudes the opportunity, to play with a dude. Who would want the same strawberry sandwich for a lifetime. gay sax is literally twice a manly.
As a closeted gay guy (not even my family know so it’s just y’all) I think you handled the situation extremely well. It doesn’t make you a bad person that you felt uncomfortable, it’s understandable cause you weren’t used to it.
In that situation, ask yourself "What would I want my roommate to do if he came in unexpectedly while I was sleeping with my girlfriend?" The answer would likely be to say nothing, mind his own business, and simply go to sleep in his own bed, which is exactly what you did. So, you did the right thing. Good for you! Being gay, he was sleeping with the right gender for him; being straight, you would be sleeping with the right gender for you. Win - win, for both of you.
I would have not been okay with that especially with two gay guys your roomate was not respecting you knowing you would be back what goes on behind d closed door is one thing but for it to be okay for him to stay there all night fuck that I woukd have hoped he got discharged after that
@@kx250braap oh what would you expect them to do seeing as they weren't expecting someone to arrive at 1am. Would you have woken them both up and ask your room mates boyfriend/date to get dressed and leave? I think he acted well within the situation and the term, 'Discretion is the better part of valour' comes to mind.
@@kx250braap just wondering here...so if the gay roommate walked in on the straight sailor in the exact same circumstance, does the straight guy get discharged? In either case it seems a little more discretion might be in order, but discharge?
@@mauroflores9820 would rather not share a room with a gay guy becuase i feel like if he sexually harrasses you (slaps your butt, complements your area) its just seen as brotherly love or dicking around from your chain of commands view, and nothing would be done, but thats just me...
Im gay myself and I think you handled that situation really well! And its obviously going to be normal for any hetersexual guy to feel a little bit uncomfortable seeing two guys together as its not what they are used too, so dont feel bad! Anyway nice video! :)
U grew from this experience and came out a better person by addressing ingrained prejudices society's bigotry has placed on all of us. Nice story, nice outcome.
lol I'd have basically done the same thing, but honestly my best friend of almost 11 years now turned out to be gay, so really I've gotten used to it. last month I stayed with him and his boyfriend for a month for the holidays so it doesn't effect me much anymore.
good points brought up , I think if I knew the person was gay before moving in , there wouldn't be a shocked reaction to him laying with another guy . I'm with you as long as they don't try to make moves on me , or have sex while im there ,I think I would be opened minded about it. Kudos to you for acknowledging the double standard for straight and gay people
I just saw this . And I want to say thank you . You handled it really well. I also respect the fact that you asked yourself why you were uncomfortable and what you would have done if it was a female in his bed. Very compassionate and honest . Awesome 👏🏼!
I'm gay and I had issues with so called straight guys hitting on me many times. One time I was at a friends house and he had a roommate. the roommate heard i was gay and he asked if i was gay so i told him yeah i was. another time I visited my friend was like I'll be back in a little bit i have to go do this. Well as he is away his roommate jumps in the shower and then I hear him calling my name saying he needed help with something. I walk upstairs to find him on his bed with his legs in the air saying he wanted to see what it feels like. I turned around and walked right back down stairs. All I could think was, I'm gay not desperate. He totally wasn't my type. He got dressed and came back down stairs and didn't say a word about it. His roommate came back and I never said a word to his roommate ether. It wasn't the first time I had so called straight guys hit on me. Like the one time i was at a bar and this guy complemented me on my eyes. we went outside then i saw the child seat in the back of his car and I stopped in my tracks. no way i was going to mess around with a guy who has a woman and a child. Then a few months after that I saw him up at wal-mart with his woman and child. He turned ghost white and I never did say anything to his woman.
What an amazingly mature perspective from someone so young. There’s all kinds of people out there and learning to live with and appreciate them will go great lengths to your own enjoyment in life and theirs
How accepting you are really warms my heart and I’m glad there’s people like you in the military. I’m a gay woman and I think it’s totally okay and really awesome of you to contemplate your feeling s/thoughts on the situation. I think it’s normal for people to be uncomfortable with things they aren’t totally familiar with like gay people, trans people, other religions etc... but if we can all try to educate others and ourselves and be respectful of all beliefs/life styles that aren’t out to hurt anyone.
Very well handled! As part of the LGBTQ+ community, and aspiring to be a sailor after high school, I totally think you handled this well! The fact you didn’t know how to think is fine! Most people who have never been in a situation like that don’t know how to handle it, and that’s perfectly fine! There’s a first for every situation! I can’t wait to get out of high school and become a sailor:)
You know you're a good person because you thought about it, you processed it, and you did the right thing even though it was uncomfortable. Kudos to you man!
Fairly certain your parents are very glad to have raised a reasoning and present human. Life is one moment after another and none of us have them all figured out. Its good to have the tools to move through new and surprising moments with some decency and grace.
Considering the situation and circumstances, I personally think, as a person with autism, you handled the entire situation extremely well with flying colors. You weren't used to it, but you addressed your momentary discomfort and asked yourself some very difficult questions and did some personal reflection. More people need to do this. I am glad that you can
You handled perfectly fine the situation! What I think is absolutely awesome is that the glasses guy had the courage to expose his hidden gayness to you!!
So thank you for being honest about your feelings. I'm gay, and was in the military; it's fine that you felt uncomfortable, you were in a situation you had not encountered before. Yes it really should be the same as if it was a girl. But now that happened, how would you feel if it happened again? Would you be more comfortable? The etiquette is if they are gonna cuddle or sleep, that's OK you'll adjust to it. It's rude to actually have sex when your roommate is there (assuming you know he's there).
Honestly, you were completely justified to feel uncomfortable. Hypothetically speaking, if you were a female and had a male roommate and you walked in too see your male roommate with a female it'd make you uncomfortable. It's no difference due to the fact he was male. It's just an uncomfortable situation.
I'm gay, and I wouldn't feel comfortable being in the room while my roommate slept with a person of either gender. I just feel like this should be a private thing.
When I was 17, I joined the Marine Corps and we seemed to always get a Corpsman (Navy) that happened to be gay, they would never say it but we knew it. Some guys made fun of them and they paid the price, when their shot cards were lost and they had to take all their shots over. Times were different back then, at the very least someone like your room mate would have to "Stand before the man", "Office Hours." Aside from that, I was hit on by a Corpsman when he was drunk. All I said was, "This is not my thing guy" . He was so ashamed the next day when he sobered up that he asked for a transfer. He came to me and told me he was very drunk and sorry and begged me not to tell anyone. I never did tell anyone, we became good friends and when ever anyone made fun of him, I stepped in and stuck up for him. During my tour in Vietnam with 1/9 Marines I kept him close to me, I wanted to come home alive. I never needed his help, but others did and he was there for them. Listening to this story is a joke to me. Try looking at this my way: ruclips.net/video/7pqudpkA7RA/видео.html War is HELL, but some of us survive. David is alive today and lives in Alabama and has a family. His grandson joined The Marine Corps because of the stories he told his family about his friend (Me) so I was told by his Grandson. I often wonder what he told them about me, but I've never asked him. He must have changed a lot. The times have changed, the rules have changed, but I never did.
True friendship is putting aside your personal discomfort to consider what's best for the other person. Glad you came around. Also, the other person could have been experimenting!? I would have imagined that to be awkward.
hey, first of all you look like a great person and you open kindness is really great. i wish more people were like you. it was still a tittle not respectful of your roommate to have sex in that room but he wanted to do it when you were gone so it wasn't his fault. i don't think is a big deal. and im gay and christian btw
I would recommend watching Flags of our Fathers. Discrimination comes in all shapes and sizes. I knew of a gentleman who was one of the troops who invaded Iwo Jima but I did not know what branch he was in. This was back when the movie came out and his friend saw the movie. Jack told me through his friend's discussion of the movie that the death and carnage was not as great as it appeared in the movie due to the large number of troops who were involved in the operation. Still, I think around 15,000 troops lost their lives. Anyway, we talked about the 4 Marines who put up the flag and then the reenactment. One of the Marines was a native. Another was black and they were treated like shit back in the US and the native Marine turned to liquor and was found dead lying face down in the mud of a pig pen in New Mexico back in the late 60s. Jack told me, that was not the reason why we went there. Some friends and I watched the movie and for some odd reason we were sitting down calmly at the end of the movie when the credits were rolling. And then they started to show some photos and letter captions from some of the Marines, Soldiers and Sailors involved in the invasion. Most of the people already left the movie theater. A few remaining who were leaving sat back down. It was actually the best part of the movie. Very moving and very sad as it captured the sense of how it is like with war buddies and war bonds. These guys risked their lives and some of them died, but they did not do it for racist biggots. If you really want to have an open mind, go visit one of the death camps in Germany. Over sixty million people died in WWII. Freedom means acceptance. Very well discussed video.
It speaks volumes to the person that you are that you took the time to run that scenario through your mind and in the end asked "What if my roommate was in bed with a girl, what would I do?". That is exactly how the situation should have been handled. As long as neither of them is doing anything to harm you, etc., what difference does it make. And thank you for respecting the other sailor's privacy when he returned for his glasses and you realized who he was. You are a Class Act.
You’re awesome. Glad I kept watching. I’m the same, I always find myself working out the details. And thank you universe for giving youtube the gift of guys like this 🐾
I was in the Navy from '66 to "70. I'm a gay Swift Boat veteran. I have much respect for you because of the way you handled this situation. I wish you had been one of my shipmates and would love to meet you.
Right off impression. You two are sharing a room. So you both have a responsibility to respect each other. Even though your roommate new at the time you were scheduled to be out until 8am, he should have given you a heads up. I'm having a friend over or whatever. Maybe he was embarrassed & didn't want to make you uncomfortable? You're reaction is commendable. You had know idea & I think did the right thing. To your point it really wouldn't have mattered if it was a guy or girl. Great discussion, thanks for sharing.
Lmao I would’ve made obvious gay jokes if they were awake after taking a shower. I would’ve been like “You guys keeping it tight?” or “You guys got room for one more?” or “You guys just love packing each other’s fudge?” or “It smells like Tom Cruise in here!” 😂
I would've took this situation the same as you did. I wish more people were like you. Not so judgmental about others, but open minded to situations like this one you have been talking about in this video. You didn't even think about switching barracks or whatever else. You thought of it in a different situation; seeing a boy or girl or boy and boy. I like how you were so open minded. By the way I just started watching your videos. I'm looking into going in the Navy. I have been for about two years now. I am 19 and just graduated high school. But my parents are not that supportive. How will I handle that situation? The videos you post inspire not just myself, but many people, so thank you!!
I think it was funny that was somebody you knew but you didn't know was gay I commend you on not being bent out of shape because of it like you said what if it was a girl you just went on with life cheers to you buddy I was also in the army and I'm gay and when my roommate wasn't there or had something to do I had somebody over every time that would have been messed huh if you would have came back I would have been a little bit embarrassed and had some explaining to do but that never happened anyway you seem like an awesome guy. Take care
I appreciate that you thought about the situation and evaluated your own reaction. You positively resolved your feelings. The thing that I often hear straight guys say is something like, "I don't want this gay guy looking at me dressed or undressed." When a guy says this, he assumes that the gay guy finds him attractive and wants to have some sort of sex with him. Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but the gay guy might be thinking, "I would never want to touch that guy. He is not my type." Like not every straight guy wants to have sex with every woman he sees, and not every woman who sees him thinks he is sexy and would like to hook up with him. Don't be so proud of yourself. Just think about it. I am writing this in December 2023. I trust you are still doing well.
I am gay and in the Navy. I was in Japan 2009-2022. Have been with my Japanese husband for 14 years (legally married for 10 years). Japan was tough dating, especially in Don't Ask Don't Tell. I lived through it all.
I enjoyed your telling about the experience. I laughed my ass off. You are a good personand we could use more guys like you in the world. I had a similar experience long ago and the outcome was tragic. I am happy to see that we have come a long way.
i would have just went to bed. Put my headphones in my ears and chill. Who cares!!?? like you said its 2015 be more accepting of homosexuals. The situation shouldn't be a Situation if your accepting with homosexuals. Thats apart of homosexuals and what they do. BRUSH IT OFF, think about something else
I think you took the long way around but at the end of the day I wish more people thought like you and at least asked yourself those questions .. the other thing I’d say is now stop and put yourself in his place and understand how much he has to worry about and hide from others and how shitty that must be .. thanks for being a chill cat being your friend would be fun .. THANK YOU for your service 🫶🫶
I’m used to situations like this. My 16 year old brother is gay, 17 year old brother is now my sister and in college my roommate and suite mates were all gay. Honestly the greatest people I ever met as well as the cleanest
Michael Campbell Its not an issue, its just something hes uncomfortable with it. He doesnt hold any ill will against gays, he just doesnt feel comfortable with putting his own sexuality in a situation like this. Im bisexual, and I totally understand if a straight male would be uncomfortable with homosexuality. The reason why hes uncomfortable is because hes never experienced this before. I assure you, if he had grown up experiencing homosexuality, like his best friend is gay, or his father comes out gay, then the topic would have simpky been normal to him. Its no different than a child walking in in his parents having sex for the first time. He hasn't experienced this before, so hes uncomfortable. Its not a bad thing to be uncomfortable with another persons sexuality. I get uncomfortable at furries and fat people. Big whoop.
3:49 - He acknowledges the issue. He's an adult with a point of reference and life experiences which ultimately allowed him to handle it by just going to sleep in his bed instead of doing something irrational. I never said what he did or how he handled it was bad; he asked what I thought and I referenced his own words.
The fact that you were even willing to ask yourself that is more than most people can say, so while it’s not up to me to determine if you’re prejudiced, I can say that you’re at least considerate.
i think its good that u looked at it from different perspective. you cant be biased bout him being with a girl and not a boy. they were asleep. not bothering you. if they were having sex and like being inappropriate. then thats different. they also did scheduled it when u weren't there. so he was being considerate. you did good job. kudos.
This a beautiful story and u are very educated and good hearted well done if only many heterosexual men taught the same Also it’s shows there is nothing wrong with one night stands with the same sex even if he is straight there was no women around so the straight guy was obviously needing it! Ur a lovely guy and whatever girl u find will be very lucky
Ironically, I've been in this situation, and the reverse of this situation, with my and my former roommates' respective hookups. This is the best way to handle it.
Wow, the Navy's really changed and a lot different than how I imagined. Having another guy in bed in the Navy. Certainly way different from the old days. And to think at one point the military thought having openly gay guys would hurt morale.
you handled it very maturely and it made you a better person for it. your right, gay people are just as normal as straight people, so it best to treat each other respectfully. the world needs less homophobic , transphobic and racist people in it , its 2022, after all
Being uncomfortable in a situation you've never been in before is OK. Being vulgar or violent to the roommate's guest or the roommate would not be OK. -- It is understandable that you'd feel uncomfortable. But it's good you could ask yourself if you were being prejudiced and why, and then treat it civilly. -- If it was a straight guy who had a girl over, it would be awkward too, right? And that's because it's an intrusion on each other's privacy, yours and his and the guest's. A guy would not expect another guy's girlfriend / guest for the night to get interested in him, but he might feel uncomfortable with her there, knowing the two of them were being intimate. -- Now if it's a gay guy with a guy, well, the guy who's the boyfriend/guest is allo not likely to be interested in the roommate (you). Straight guys might worry about that, but generally, not gonna happen. (Not a good relationship sign in most cases if the guy guest did get interested.) But that's not something to worry about, for the straight guys who get worried about it. Gay guys do not like every guy they see, straight or gay, and fairly quickly learn that liking a straight guy is not gonna work, because (duh) he doesn't like it. Sure, a gay guy might like how another guy looks. But just like with straight guys, he's gonna know the difference between just looking versus trying anything. So quit worrying, straight guys. -- Note: Yeah, a gay guy might feel uncomfortable too, either because he's never had much experience around other gay guys or around other straight guys. So he may feel insecure around his straight roommate or his gay roommate, or if a roommate brings over a girlfriend or boyfriend. But it's natural to feel awkward, because you don't want to intrude on your roommate or their guest, and you don't want them intruding on your privacy either. There's basic primitive instincts going there too: both sides recognize the other might be a rival or might be a friend, so they're prepared instinctively in case the situation turns bad. On the other hand, since they know each other (the roommates) they also don't want it to turn bad, they want to remain rriendly. So it stresses things. Hmm, I suppose on an instinctual level, one ape-man might not be too bothered by another ape-man with his mate/date, just cautious in case it got hairy. (Haha.) -- And back when I was college age, oh yeah, I felt awkward around my roommates, because I hadn't been around other guys 24/7 enough to be comfortable with them, and that was in terms of basic guy stuff, plus sexuality besides that. It's something you just have to work out for yourself. But don't worry, guys. The gay guy is probably just as concerned about not getting jumped (or humped) as you are, and he's not looking to jump (or hump) any other guys, until and unless he knows someone likes him and wants to do it with him, and then, only if they both like each other. Which is just the same as how the boy-girl straight couple works it out. The straight guy is not gonna want every girl in sight. Only a few are going to appeal to him as girlfriends, and of those girls he likes, only a few are going to like him back, and of those few, hey, that's why they call it getting lucky, because it doesn't always happen that the two like each other and want to do that. So this is, believe it or not, how it works for most gay guys too. There is such a thing as self-control and being civilized and knowing boundaries, and not messing with someone who does not want to be messed with. If the other guy (or girl) doesn't like it, then it's not gonna be much of any fun, so don't bother. Same for the gay guys as the straight guys.
Seriously, you were shipshape and Bristol fashion. Man, we all work for our country and we all do it (most do) honorably and in line. You're gonna freak about some cuddling shit, I don't want you on my crew under GQ. Bravo Zulu to you shipmate (yeah, I shipmated you).
I'm a gay man, and I think Navy sailors are so cute. I sometimes see the recruits around here (must be attending Great Lakes naval training) in their uniforms and love them 😍.
Hi Hun! You’ve appeared in 2024. You’ve handled it really well. I thought NAVY branch of the forces would have a high population of gay members. My only concern, is going to the shower. Could be misconstrued as an invitation. Consider what you wanted from your room mate? maybe go to bed and leave it? Might be time to chat about signals. Like placing a “red square” ducted tape to the door is room mate signal for company is over. Hoping you are well.
The fact that you questioned your actions shows you are are growing as a person. The you are emotionally and socially growing and that cool. Yes its the first you faced it you started nrgative but you thought about it. You roomate was trying to noot put you in that situation by only having his partner over ehilst you where away but that messed up. Once you compared to heterosexual situation you saw that you reaction was wrong. That was a big step forward. You should congratulate yourself maybe you should give this talk to new recruits to enlighten them. Keep up your good work
So basically he was a normal sailor?
Typical sailor.
I love how open minded and reflective you are. You ask yourself the hard questions and are empathetic. It's so good to be cognitive. As a person who identifies with LGBTQ, I appreciate anyone who can be open minded. We all keep learning.
I think gay guys should have straight friends like you. You can't catch gay by being in the same room with someone (or more) who is gay. It's not like the flu. 😄
You handled it well.
Yeah, being gay isnt toxic
hah, now I'm imagining all those doctor's notes: Please excuse Billy for being absent because caught the straightness cooties." "Please excuse Billy for being out with the gay cooties." "Please excuse Billy. He's been very confused lately, what with the gay cooties and the straight cooties. We are just glad he's stopped humping the furniture!"
You can get AIDS from fucking each other in the ass, no condom. Statistic facts
I beg a differ
Depends on the guy. Lol!
i love how open minded and non judgemental you are!! there needs to be more people like you.
I think you handled it really well, but why do straight dudes usually think that gay dudes will come on to them. It's almost like an insult. gay dudes have self control and discipline too they don't try to get with every guy in sight
+Richie T. idk man ,,, for me i was raised strict catholic so too me a while to develop my own opinion etc ..
Yeah that's cool I respect that. Love your attitude about it though because that guy could've had a roommate that handled it terribly. I actually ship in Apr and your videos have helped me a lot on what to expect. Thanks a lot bro
cool man have fun out there
Richie T. Because straight guys try to get with every girl
lol'd
I think you did exactly the right thing. You went to bed and slept. Kudos to you for turning this into a learning and teaching moment!
The gays know other gays, even if they are closeted lmao. It's called gaydar hahaha. It's almost like an intuition.
Your lying that an excuse for y’all to force y’all self on straight people
@@brandonjablasone7544 If the “straight” guy gave into the gay act… trust it wasn’t forced he wanted to try it! You don’t do stuff unwillingly w/ outa gun to yo head
Lamest shit I ever heard u fucked it up in the middle part
@@keenenwoods3391amen
@@brandonjablasone7544 Its not force, more give the straight dudes the opportunity, to play with a dude. Who would want the same strawberry sandwich for a lifetime. gay sax is literally twice a manly.
As a closeted gay guy (not even my family know so it’s just y’all) I think you handled the situation extremely well. It doesn’t make you a bad person that you felt uncomfortable, it’s understandable cause you weren’t used to it.
"I don't mind if you're trans, gay or yellow"
Spongebob was my roommate once..
Homer Simpson was mine
"i see two heads.." like human heads" hahahahhahahahahaha
benjie lacey 😂
Lmao probably 2 dik heads!!! Hahaha
He had to make sure nobody is thinking the two heads he saw were dick heads. 😂😂😂
No, it’s because the word for restroom is also “head” & is very widely used in navy lingo so he had to reiterate that it was a human “head”
In that situation, ask yourself "What would I want my roommate to do if he came in unexpectedly while I was sleeping with my girlfriend?" The answer would likely be to say nothing, mind his own business, and simply go to sleep in his own bed, which is exactly what you did. So, you did the right thing. Good for you! Being gay, he was sleeping with the right gender for him; being straight, you would be sleeping with the right gender for you. Win - win, for both of you.
Eddie Gardner Thank you!
Love this comment
I would have not been okay with that especially with two gay guys your roomate was not respecting you knowing you would be back what goes on behind d closed door is one thing but for it to be okay for him to stay there all night fuck that I woukd have hoped he got discharged after that
@@kx250braap oh what would you expect them to do seeing as they weren't expecting someone to arrive at 1am. Would you have woken them both up and ask your room mates boyfriend/date to get dressed and leave? I think he acted well within the situation and the term, 'Discretion is the better part of valour' comes to mind.
@@kx250braap just wondering here...so if the gay roommate walked in on the straight sailor in the exact same circumstance, does the straight guy get discharged? In either case it seems a little more discretion might be in order, but discharge?
I wanted to say that was a very amazing reaction to the situation you were put in. I have a lot of respect for you dude.
I wish more straight men would think the same way. Thank you for this.
4jimmycurtis why straight men specifically? Why not all people in general?
476 Anno Domini because I feel like it’s quicker for guys to judge
@@mauroflores9820 would rather not share a room with a gay guy becuase i feel like if he sexually harrasses you (slaps your butt, complements your area) its just seen as brotherly love or dicking around from your chain of commands view, and nothing would be done, but thats just me...
Meme Boi that’s a personal most gay men don’t do that shit so don’t be stereotypical and stop being ignorant. Asshole
@@mauroflores9820 lmao stop being ignorant its the truth
Im gay myself and I think you handled that situation really well! And its obviously going to be normal for any hetersexual guy to feel a little bit uncomfortable seeing two guys together as its not what they are used too, so dont feel bad!
Anyway nice video! :)
Scott Lilburn my thoughts exactly Scott.
Scott Lilburn -- Sounds like he was feeling the heat, Scott Assburn!
😏😏
Gaaayyyyyy
Scott Lilburn well there something wrong with your brain
U grew from this experience and came out a better person by addressing ingrained prejudices society's bigotry has placed on all of us. Nice story, nice outcome.
I think you handled it well. how you feel about it is your issue, but that was well handled
+Charles Winstead appreciate it
this isnt a gay issue...this is a privacy issue...rules and boundriesnshould have been set before hand.
Imagine if you didn't know he was gay and that's how you found out lmao
Major props to you man. So open-minded and most importantly self-aware.
lol I'd have basically done the same thing, but honestly my best friend of almost 11 years now turned out to be gay, so really I've gotten used to it. last month I stayed with him and his boyfriend for a month for the holidays so it doesn't effect me much anymore.
good points brought up , I think if I knew the person was gay before moving in , there wouldn't be a shocked reaction to him laying with another guy . I'm with you as long as they don't try to make moves on me , or have sex while im there ,I think I would be opened minded about it. Kudos to you for acknowledging the double standard for straight and gay people
Andrew Alvarado appreciate it man thanks
Andrew Alvarado straight men are so foolish and narrow minded sometimes.
That's a very good way to put it.
I just saw this . And I want to say thank you . You handled it really well. I also respect the fact that you asked yourself why you were uncomfortable and what you would have done if it was a female in his bed. Very compassionate and honest . Awesome 👏🏼!
I'm gay and I had issues with so called straight guys hitting on me many times. One time I was at a friends house and he had a roommate. the roommate heard i was gay and he asked if i was gay so i told him yeah i was. another time I visited my friend was like I'll be back in a little bit i have to go do this. Well as he is away his roommate jumps in the shower and then I hear him calling my name saying he needed help with something. I walk upstairs to find him on his bed with his legs in the air saying he wanted to see what it feels like. I turned around and walked right back down stairs. All I could think was, I'm gay not desperate. He totally wasn't my type. He got dressed and came back down stairs and didn't say a word about it. His roommate came back and I never said a word to his roommate ether. It wasn't the first time I had so called straight guys hit on me. Like the one time i was at a bar and this guy complemented me on my eyes. we went outside then i saw the child seat in the back of his car and I stopped in my tracks. no way i was going to mess around with a guy who has a woman and a child. Then a few months after that I saw him up at wal-mart with his woman and child. He turned ghost white and I never did say anything to his woman.
What an amazingly mature perspective from someone so young. There’s all kinds of people out there and learning to live with and appreciate them will go great lengths to your own enjoyment in life and theirs
How accepting you are really warms my heart and I’m glad there’s people like you in the military. I’m a gay woman and I think it’s totally okay and really awesome of you to contemplate your feeling s/thoughts on the situation. I think it’s normal for people to be uncomfortable with things they aren’t totally familiar with like gay people, trans people, other religions etc... but if we can all try to educate others and ourselves and be respectful of all beliefs/life styles that aren’t out to hurt anyone.
in the navy
Very well handled! As part of the LGBTQ+ community, and aspiring to be a sailor after high school, I totally think you handled this well! The fact you didn’t know how to think is fine! Most people who have never been in a situation like that don’t know how to handle it, and that’s perfectly fine! There’s a first for every situation! I can’t wait to get out of high school and become a sailor:)
You know you're a good person because you thought about it, you processed it, and you did the right thing even though it was uncomfortable. Kudos to you man!
Fairly certain your parents are very glad to have raised a reasoning and present human. Life is one moment after another and none of us have them all figured out. Its good to have the tools to move through new and surprising moments with some decency and grace.
Considering the situation and circumstances, I personally think, as a person with autism, you handled the entire situation extremely well with flying colors. You weren't used to it, but you addressed your momentary discomfort and asked yourself some very difficult questions and did some personal reflection. More people need to do this. I am glad that you can
You handled perfectly fine the situation! What I think is absolutely awesome is that the glasses guy had the courage to expose his hidden gayness to you!!
Great job! You should be commended as the world can always use more people who stop & think before simply reacting.
with that pompadour and the earrings, I honestly thought YOU were the "gay navy roommate"...you M. Night Shyamalan'ed me...WHAT A TWIST!
Amazing video, hope there's more accepting people like you still in the navy! Keep it up!
So thank you for being honest about your feelings. I'm gay, and was in the military; it's fine that you felt uncomfortable, you were in a situation you had not encountered before. Yes it really should be the same as if it was a girl. But now that happened, how would you feel if it happened again? Would you be more comfortable?
The etiquette is if they are gonna cuddle or sleep, that's OK you'll adjust to it. It's rude to actually have sex when your roommate is there (assuming you know he's there).
Honestly, you were completely justified to feel uncomfortable. Hypothetically speaking, if you were a female and had a male roommate and you walked in too see your male roommate with a female it'd make you uncomfortable. It's no difference due to the fact he was male. It's just an uncomfortable situation.
At the end of the day, everyone's sexuality is different. U handled the situation with respect :) I hope my roomate in the navy is as cool as JT!
I'm gay, and I wouldn't feel comfortable being in the room while my roommate slept with a person of either gender. I just feel like this should be a private thing.
It really wouldn't bother me too much
+Daniel Keating well thats good i guess
When I was 17, I joined the Marine Corps and we seemed to always get a Corpsman (Navy) that happened to be gay, they would never say it but we knew it. Some guys made fun of them and they paid the price, when their shot cards were lost and they had to take all their shots over. Times were different back then, at the very least someone like your room mate would have to "Stand before the man", "Office Hours." Aside from that, I was hit on by a Corpsman when he was drunk. All I said was, "This is not my thing guy" . He was so ashamed the next day when he sobered up that he asked for a transfer. He came to me and told me he was very drunk and sorry and begged me not to tell anyone. I never did tell anyone, we became good friends and when ever anyone made fun of him, I stepped in and stuck up for him. During my tour in Vietnam with 1/9 Marines I kept him close to me, I wanted to come home alive. I never needed his help, but others did and he was there for them. Listening to this story is a joke to me. Try looking at this my way: ruclips.net/video/7pqudpkA7RA/видео.html War is HELL, but some of us survive. David is alive today and lives in Alabama and has a family. His grandson joined The Marine Corps because of the stories he told his family about his friend (Me) so I was told by his Grandson. I often wonder what he told them about me, but I've never asked him. He must have changed a lot.
The times have changed, the rules have changed, but I never did.
Glad you learned that true friendship means putting your personal discomfort aside to think about what's best for them.
I think you should have joined them lol. Seriously you really handle it like a very mature adult. Thank you for serving and be safe.
anyone here from JTs recent?
Me lmao !
Me lol😭
I’m from today! Lol his episode sent me here
low key love the self discovery and bettering himself
True friendship is putting aside your personal discomfort to consider what's best for the other person. Glad you came around.
Also, the other person could have been experimenting!?
I would have imagined that to be awkward.
hey, first of all you look like a great person and you open kindness is really great. i wish more people were like you. it was still a tittle not respectful of your roommate to have sex in that room but he wanted to do it when you were gone so it wasn't his fault. i don't think is a big deal. and im gay and christian btw
+tachy m thank you for your kind comment mi amigo :)
have a great day !
I would recommend watching Flags of our Fathers. Discrimination comes in all shapes and sizes. I knew of a gentleman who was one of the troops who invaded Iwo Jima but I did not know what branch he was in. This was back when the movie came out and his friend saw the movie. Jack told me through his friend's discussion of the movie that the death and carnage was not as great as it appeared in the movie due to the large number of troops who were involved in the operation. Still, I think around 15,000 troops lost their lives. Anyway, we talked about the 4 Marines who put up the flag and then the reenactment. One of the Marines was a native. Another was black and they were treated like shit back in the US and the native Marine turned to liquor and was found dead lying face down in the mud of a pig pen in New Mexico back in the late 60s. Jack told me, that was not the reason why we went there.
Some friends and I watched the movie and for some odd reason we were sitting down calmly at the end of the movie when the credits were rolling. And then they started to show some photos and letter captions from some of the Marines, Soldiers and Sailors involved in the invasion. Most of the people already left the movie theater. A few remaining who were leaving sat back down. It was actually the best part of the movie. Very moving and very sad as it captured the sense of how it is like with war buddies and war bonds. These guys risked their lives and some of them died, but they did not do it for racist biggots.
If you really want to have an open mind, go visit one of the death camps in Germany. Over sixty million people died in WWII. Freedom means acceptance. Very well discussed video.
One of your best videos.
Gabriel Valentin Thank you my friend !
In my Navy days you were not allowed to have overnight guests.
It speaks volumes to the person that you are that you took the time to run that scenario through your mind and in the end asked "What if my roommate was in bed with a girl, what would I do?". That is exactly how the situation should have been handled. As long as neither of them is doing anything to harm you, etc., what difference does it make. And thank you for respecting the other sailor's privacy when he returned for his glasses and you realized who he was. You are a Class Act.
You’re awesome. Glad I kept watching. I’m the same, I always find myself working out the details. And thank you universe for giving youtube the gift of guys like this 🐾
I was in the Navy from '66 to "70. I'm a gay Swift Boat veteran. I have much respect for you because of the way you handled this situation. I wish you had been one of my shipmates and would love to meet you.
Thank you for your service.
@mikedodson7719 thanks for your support
I think it's a shame that more people don't think things over like this. I dig the maturity of it.
Just like your chest tattoo says, you are comfortable with your own self & thus treating others with respect❣️
Good work, you took it like a champ. You got hit by real life and acted like a grownup rational guy.
Right off impression. You two are sharing a room. So you both have a responsibility to respect each other. Even though your roommate new at the time you were scheduled to be out until 8am, he should have given you a heads up. I'm having a friend over or whatever. Maybe he was embarrassed & didn't want to make you uncomfortable? You're reaction is commendable. You had know idea & I think did the right thing. To your point it really wouldn't have mattered if it was a guy or girl. Great discussion, thanks for sharing.
you did good on that.
You r great to talk about your feelings. They r fantastic!
I'd be like hey handsome when he comes back for his glasses. U look like a snack 😋
Lmao I would’ve made obvious gay jokes if they were awake after taking a shower. I would’ve been like “You guys keeping it tight?” or “You guys got room for one more?” or “You guys just love packing each other’s fudge?” or “It smells like Tom Cruise in here!” 😂
I would've took this situation the same as you did. I wish more people were like you. Not so judgmental about others, but open minded to situations like this one you have been talking about in this video. You didn't even think about switching barracks or whatever else. You thought of it in a different situation; seeing a boy or girl or boy and boy. I like how you were so open minded.
By the way I just started watching your videos. I'm looking into going in the Navy. I have been for about two years now. I am 19 and just graduated high school. But my parents are not that supportive. How will I handle that situation? The videos you post inspire not just myself, but many people, so thank you!!
Right, you were the gay roommate.
Lmao
I think it was funny that was somebody you knew but you didn't know was gay I commend you on not being bent out of shape because of it like you said what if it was a girl you just went on with life cheers to you buddy I was also in the army and I'm gay and when my roommate wasn't there or had something to do I had somebody over every time that would have been messed huh if you would have came back I would have been a little bit embarrassed and had some explaining to do but that never happened anyway you seem like an awesome guy. Take care
I appreciate that you thought about the situation and evaluated your own reaction. You positively resolved your feelings. The thing that I often hear straight guys say is something like, "I don't want this gay guy looking at me dressed or undressed." When a guy says this, he assumes that the gay guy finds him attractive and wants to have some sort of sex with him. Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but the gay guy might be thinking, "I would never want to touch that guy. He is not my type." Like not every straight guy wants to have sex with every woman he sees, and not every woman who sees him thinks he is sexy and would like to hook up with him. Don't be so proud of yourself. Just think about it. I am writing this in December 2023. I trust you are still doing well.
I am gay and in the Navy. I was in Japan 2009-2022. Have been with my Japanese husband for 14 years (legally married for 10 years). Japan was tough dating, especially in Don't Ask Don't Tell. I lived through it all.
I enjoyed your telling about the experience. I laughed my ass off. You are a good personand we could use more guys like you in the world. I had a similar experience long ago and the outcome was tragic. I am happy to see that we have come a long way.
Whether a girl or a guy, no chaca, chaca in the army.
You addressed your implicit biases...good job!!
i would have just went to bed. Put my headphones in my ears and chill. Who cares!!?? like you said its 2015 be more accepting of homosexuals. The situation shouldn't be a Situation if your accepting with homosexuals. Thats apart of homosexuals and what they do. BRUSH IT OFF, think about something else
Elijah Hunt if the guy feels uncomfortable, then that's his own opinion.
I bet your room looked FABULOUS!
I think you took the long way around but at the end of the day I wish more people thought like you and at least asked yourself those questions .. the other thing I’d say is now stop and put yourself in his place and understand how much he has to worry about and hide from others and how shitty that must be .. thanks for being a chill cat being your friend would be fun .. THANK YOU for your service 🫶🫶
I’m used to situations like this. My 16 year old brother is gay, 17 year old brother is now my sister and in college my roommate and suite mates were all gay. Honestly the greatest people I ever met as well as the cleanest
Yeah, you answered it yourself...you have the issue. If it was a chick , there would have been no problem.
Michael Campbell Its not an issue, its just something hes uncomfortable with it. He doesnt hold any ill will against gays, he just doesnt feel comfortable with putting his own sexuality in a situation like this.
Im bisexual, and I totally understand if a straight male would be uncomfortable with homosexuality. The reason why hes uncomfortable is because hes never experienced this before. I assure you, if he had grown up experiencing homosexuality, like his best friend is gay, or his father comes out gay, then the topic would have simpky been normal to him. Its no different than a child walking in in his parents having sex for the first time. He hasn't experienced this before, so hes uncomfortable.
Its not a bad thing to be uncomfortable with another persons sexuality. I get uncomfortable at furries and fat people. Big whoop.
3:49 - He acknowledges the issue. He's an adult with a point of reference and life experiences which ultimately allowed him to handle it by just going to sleep in his bed instead of doing something irrational. I never said what he did or how he handled it was bad; he asked what I thought and I referenced his own words.
Michael Campbell i just wouldnt call it an issue
Michael Campbell I’d actually have looked for a different place to crash. To give them privacy
The fact that you were even willing to ask yourself that is more than most people can say, so while it’s not up to me to determine if you’re prejudiced, I can say that you’re at least considerate.
You're an E-5?! You look like you're 21! Lol
i think its good that u looked at it from different perspective. you cant be biased bout him being with a girl and not a boy. they were asleep. not bothering you. if they were having sex and like being inappropriate. then thats different. they also did scheduled it when u weren't there. so he was being considerate. you did good job. kudos.
Omg. You you saw two guys asleep in a bed. Lol
"do you like, also.... anyway guys" uhhhhh, no thanks Justin xD
This a beautiful story and u are very educated and good hearted well done if only many heterosexual men taught the same
Also it’s shows there is nothing wrong with one night stands with the same sex even if he is straight there was no women around so the straight guy was obviously needing it! Ur a lovely guy and whatever girl u find will be very lucky
Lol Nahh it ain't discriminatory or prejudice. It's just a double standard between sexual orientation. Sex is Sex. No 50 shades of grey in between.
No, it's just feeling uncomfortable
Ironically, I've been in this situation, and the reverse of this situation, with my and my former roommates' respective hookups. This is the best way to handle it.
Those guys sure had fun in the boot camp showers
Wrong. Boot camp is exhausting, and the LAST thing you think about is sex.
im gay... going to navy.
Benjamin Pineda navy strong
Stupid answer idiot
Like the village people song from the 70s.
Thanks for the Video, I will be including it in a research paper for college. Btw, Corpsman here.
Wait... aren’t all sailors gay? Jk it’s a joke don’t get butthurt. Ha
🤣🤣🤣
Wow, the Navy's really changed and a lot different than how I imagined.
Having another guy in bed in the Navy.
Certainly way different from the old days.
And to think at one point the military thought having openly gay guys would hurt morale.
you handled it very maturely and it made you a better person for it. your right, gay people are just as normal as straight people, so it best to treat each other respectfully. the world needs less homophobic , transphobic and racist people in it , its 2022, after all
Now they do it to where they ask you on paperwork before MEPS: "what sex were you born?" "Which sex do you prefer to go by"
Being uncomfortable in a situation you've never been in before is OK. Being vulgar or violent to the roommate's guest or the roommate would not be OK. -- It is understandable that you'd feel uncomfortable. But it's good you could ask yourself if you were being prejudiced and why, and then treat it civilly. -- If it was a straight guy who had a girl over, it would be awkward too, right? And that's because it's an intrusion on each other's privacy, yours and his and the guest's. A guy would not expect another guy's girlfriend / guest for the night to get interested in him, but he might feel uncomfortable with her there, knowing the two of them were being intimate. -- Now if it's a gay guy with a guy, well, the guy who's the boyfriend/guest is allo not likely to be interested in the roommate (you). Straight guys might worry about that, but generally, not gonna happen. (Not a good relationship sign in most cases if the guy guest did get interested.) But that's not something to worry about, for the straight guys who get worried about it. Gay guys do not like every guy they see, straight or gay, and fairly quickly learn that liking a straight guy is not gonna work, because (duh) he doesn't like it. Sure, a gay guy might like how another guy looks. But just like with straight guys, he's gonna know the difference between just looking versus trying anything. So quit worrying, straight guys. -- Note: Yeah, a gay guy might feel uncomfortable too, either because he's never had much experience around other gay guys or around other straight guys. So he may feel insecure around his straight roommate or his gay roommate, or if a roommate brings over a girlfriend or boyfriend. But it's natural to feel awkward, because you don't want to intrude on your roommate or their guest, and you don't want them intruding on your privacy either. There's basic primitive instincts going there too: both sides recognize the other might be a rival or might be a friend, so they're prepared instinctively in case the situation turns bad. On the other hand, since they know each other (the roommates) they also don't want it to turn bad, they want to remain rriendly. So it stresses things. Hmm, I suppose on an instinctual level, one ape-man might not be too bothered by another ape-man with his mate/date, just cautious in case it got hairy. (Haha.) -- And back when I was college age, oh yeah, I felt awkward around my roommates, because I hadn't been around other guys 24/7 enough to be comfortable with them, and that was in terms of basic guy stuff, plus sexuality besides that. It's something you just have to work out for yourself. But don't worry, guys. The gay guy is probably just as concerned about not getting jumped (or humped) as you are, and he's not looking to jump (or hump) any other guys, until and unless he knows someone likes him and wants to do it with him, and then, only if they both like each other. Which is just the same as how the boy-girl straight couple works it out. The straight guy is not gonna want every girl in sight. Only a few are going to appeal to him as girlfriends, and of those girls he likes, only a few are going to like him back, and of those few, hey, that's why they call it getting lucky, because it doesn't always happen that the two like each other and want to do that. So this is, believe it or not, how it works for most gay guys too. There is such a thing as self-control and being civilized and knowing boundaries, and not messing with someone who does not want to be messed with. If the other guy (or girl) doesn't like it, then it's not gonna be much of any fun, so don't bother. Same for the gay guys as the straight guys.
Well done realising that it should not matter whether your roommate (or anyone) was sharing his bed with a man or a woman.
You are human. You did a great job processing it.
Thank you, such a small event made you changed ❤️into a better person, I wish I had friends like you
1st of all - Thank You for your service! ❤️ -
I just wanted to say that a male is a male and a girl is a girl -
Period
This is coming a gay man 😘
There's nothing you can do in that situation... That's the best thing to do.
Seriously, you were shipshape and Bristol fashion. Man, we all work for our country and we all do it (most do) honorably and in line. You're gonna freak about some cuddling shit, I don't want you on my crew under GQ. Bravo Zulu to you shipmate (yeah, I shipmated you).
I'm a gay man, and I think Navy sailors are so cute. I sometimes see the recruits around here (must be attending Great Lakes naval training) in their uniforms and love them 😍.
Hi Hun! You’ve appeared in 2024. You’ve handled it really well. I thought NAVY branch of the forces would have a high population of gay members. My only concern, is going to the shower. Could be misconstrued as an invitation. Consider what you wanted from your room mate? maybe go to bed and leave it? Might be time to chat about signals. Like placing a “red square” ducted tape to the door is room mate signal for company is over. Hoping you are well.
The fact that you questioned your actions shows you are are growing as a person. The you are emotionally and socially growing and that cool. Yes its the first you faced it you started nrgative but you thought about it. You roomate was trying to noot put you in that situation by only having his partner over ehilst you where away but that messed up. Once you compared to heterosexual situation you saw that you reaction was wrong. That was a big step forward.
You should congratulate yourself maybe you should give this talk to new recruits to enlighten them.
Keep up your good work
I was in the navy from 1985 to 1995. Aviation like you, an AMS. Myself i just would have been to uncomfortable in my own space in that situation.
This was very helpful and entertaining