What He Really Means: Decoding Texts
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- Sometimes texting isn’t the best way to communicate. Thank goodness Steve is here to help figure things out.
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“ If he loves you, you’ll know ; if he doesn’t, you’ll be confused ”
I love this
Very very very TRUE! FACTS!
Mhmmm, this is good!!
Tyy
This here is so real
Instead of shaming her.... Let's thank her for publicly talking about this... allot of women and men go through situations like this
SarahJM who is shaming her? Nobody. This is what happened when you put your personal life out there it’s plenty of room for opinions but it’s not shaming.
@@feliciacat88 indeed room for opinions this is my opinion
It's not shame, it's a dose of reality
I'm going through that now
I don't think I'm shaming her, but I don't get how she's confused. He straight says "we're just friends with a bit on top". How can he make his intentions any plainer???? It seemed like she was barely getting it when Steve was explaining it. She was clapping with the audience. 🤦
"If you're confused, he's not the one" wish I had a dad to explain things like that to me. Thank you Steve !
I have a dad, I was never taught this through him. I just read his book and learned so much I never knew. I was never taught a lot of what he said. I'd have been a lot better off if I knew this stuff back when I was 13/14 not when I was 23
Never let a man tell you twice he don’t want you.
YES GIRL!
Thank you
Learned that lesson
He tells you once that's enough
My husband be telling me this. Wen i try to move on, he pulls me back in. Repeat
Never let a man tell you that you are friends with a "little bit on top".
Why
@@popedizzled_mywizzle Go n ask your parents.
Yeah never known a guy 2 say that unless they're not interested...Women do the same thing
Unless you both agree to a Friend with Benefits and one ends up catching feelings for the other person and when he/she reminds he/she about what they agreed upon, they tend to forget. I'm a Fwb type, don't got time or years to waste.
I have never heard that expression before...
Awwww she seems like such a lovely person. It’s so horrible that the good people in life always hurt or mistreated 💔
Sweetheart it's the same thing with me. I was in a situation where I really liked a guy but he had other things in mind. But the difference with me is that I didn't even give him the chance to go further. I used my favorite 2 part formula
block+delete=bye
Lol
Misty Blue ohhhh girllll I can relateee! I liked this guy and he made it seem so much more than what it is. He would show me feelings on and off. I don’t know how to handle dating now, I mean I wanna date but how do I know I’m not just gonna get hurt again?
shame on you if you fool me once, shame on me if you fool me twice ;-)
Chocolate Cookie
It's called "Red flags" u been through hurt situation meaning u should recognize it ... NEVER underestimate ur intuition
Msjawanda I’m listening 😩 x
Friends with a little bit on top??? What kind of nonsense is that? He's trying to finesse you and ghost you! Girl, block that number and move on.
soulstrenth crusader lol
Sounds like he already finessed her many times.. 👀
soulstrenth crusader He’s not even trying to hide the FACT that he’s not really into her. She’s the one settling for crumbs. Women have to get smarter about these things and understand that men are being honest and aren’t happy until they make a man lie. Smh
Listen! I had to pause on that. "A little on top"???? Nope. And after you gone say 10pm? Week night??? Double No.
trying to?! he's been finessing her ass for 8 months
Not only was she a booty call, but she was a RESCHEDULED booty call. Smh. This is why fathers are needed, to teach their daughters the game. Personally, I don't respond to night time invitations from men, but that's just me.
Gina H 🤣🤣😂not RESCHEDULED!!! RUclips comments are the best.
Gina H me too
My father didn't teach me the game...he was just a great example of what a good man should be.
brittany marsh That's another form of teaching, by showing you how a man is supposed to treat you. If you get good treatment from a man all your life you will come to expect it and be less likely to accept less.
shojogrl it's true! She was so far down his list that he moved guaranteed sex to a different day!
She knew this all along.. In my opinion, she was just in-denial or liked him so much that "no" wasn't an option.
I agree.
Clearly, that's why Steve broke it down for her. We saw the light 'go on' when she got it.
@@lisax119 😒...
@@lisax119 Nope. She's too dumb to know. She allow herself to be ignorant over a fool.
Mmm...
The hurt, pain is apparent all in her facial expression. She's in denial, and just needed Uncle Steve to confirm what she already knows. Truth is that she's a lovely young lady who deserves much better. I truly hope she moved on to focus on things and people that benefit her.
Steve is doing this young lady a great favor. He's telling her what reality is before she well and truly gets her heart broken. It is better to know now than later.
"BELIEVE A MAN WHEN HE TELLS YOU SOMETHING" I tell my daughter that all the time. What proceeds out of your mouth is in your heart. You better believe it!! That's true
"I don't have time for foolishness"
Uhh, baby girl, that's 8 months too late now.
The shade😂😂😂
😁
Oh be quiet.
Toooooo late.
Am I working in the back does my clothes matter
She looks like a lovely person, I pray for the right man will find her soon. #GodBlessHer
🌸 when a man leaves a woman confused, then he’s not that into you
He’s seeing other women.....run! run like hell !
When you're dating, until u actually COMMIT both parties should be seeing other people.
If that was me I would have blocked his number and stopped talking to him the first time he said "10:30PM"
Hauls, & crafts
She was settling 4 sure...
Yup.. what an idiot telling her something on top
@@MsJP we've all been there sis... wanting to be with someone so bad despite all the red flags...hopefully uncle Steve opened her eyes
Mrembo Mweusi
I hope so...I don't miss those naive days...like the old folks say "When U Know Better U Do Better "
Hauls, & crafts sound like a booty call
8 months?! This shouldn't went on 8 days.
Or 8 minutes
@@archyleonardodd838 "or 8 minutes"...... #Yessir
Well what do u know.
@@archyleonardodd838 or the second "can I meet U late at night?"
Steve is a wise man. He’s speaking the truth. Now I look back at it ..makes all the sense in the world . Believe me ladies it’s not worth it. Take care of yourself.
Anna L the fact she couldn’t tell what he meant though has me worried
Some dudes get their jollies out of stringing along multiple attractive women, never being committed to one (even just in dating). This girl is VERY cute and she's right in that she deserves better. Don't put up with being strung along. She's the catch here, not this texter dude. Throw him to the curb, girl, you definitely deserve way better.
John D still the fact she had to come on the show and needed Steve to spell out what he meant, which I mean anyone who can read knows what the dude meant
+Imersiion Humans, and I mean you, me and everyone, all have a tendency to be blind to things that we really care about, are strongly attracted to, or have strong emotional investment. She really liked this guy, maybe even developed love for him, and that will naturally make her gloss over the guy's faults. You can tell because she says the "revelation" (which seems obvious to you, me and the audience) actually "breaks her heart." For guys, being "p-whipped" is much the same... we can ignore a ton of things wrong with women who treat us badly when we develop strong feelings. Our biology can make relationships intense and wonderful when feelings are mutual, but when it's one-sided our biology can be our own worst enemy.
Urgh I cant stand what texting has done to courtship... it's one thing if you're texting to organize daytime dates
I once had a friend who's only relationship with a guy was via text and they were yet to meet in person or go out for a date smh
@@johnd5574 Well that's the sad truth. Most people aren't as hardend or oblivious as they claim to be. Sometimes it's better to have some tell you, it could very well free you from confusion. Overthinking is like indecision, Terrible.
💯💯💯
2:30 she almost cried. Really liked the guy
James Smith yh I know poor girl she’s beautiful I’m sure she will find a good man she just needs to get some standards and boundaries
I would’ve said “k”when he said something kinda came up 😂
Boss Bebe That’s right. Sometimes you have to play along. Can’t be to serious.
colita duncan exactly!
Followed by ....lose my number✌🏾
Say that!
Lmao same here.
The advice that has helped me out the most is if you’re confused with what he wants, probably not the one to be with. But if he gives you reassurance often, probably one you can be with. There are times even in the reassurance that he might have you confused BUT his actions will back up the reassurance or the confusion.
Yeah imma just f off next time. I thought I *should* trust ppl but I guess I shouldn't have, should've just trusted my gut feeling.
Steve is the dad I never had. Thank you ❤️
Set your boundaries from the get go of your initial seeing each other stages. Don’t give your body away unless it is openly confirmed by both parties that you are both in a relationship with each other.
She’s brave for putting this on TV. It’s a learning curve for her & all women watching
This was way too simple idk how she didn't see it 😂 Poor girl tho she looks sweet
It was😂😂😂😂
When someone shows you who they are, believe it. Ladies& gentlemen please don't go around with blinders on and ignore the blinking red flags .
Yeah don't believe in words. A guy who likes U needs to "show" it otherwise just f off.
"Wasting my time on foolishness, have no time..." yes girl and I love your hair
Poor chic. I had my share of dirt bags and finally woke up. Am married now and could not be happier ! She deserves better and I hope she finds the right guy that will love and honor her and respect her time ...
Now she's gonna think she's worthless and she'll think his treatment towards her has got to do with her value. You have to understand, men are not supposed to behave like this. As if women were sexual objects to gratify their sexual desires. Just like those same men wouldn't want other men treat their daughters like that. A men of God treat women as if they were their sisters and pursue her in a godly way. As precious stones.
Only true Kings and Queens of divine spirit & integrity will understand this factual statement. Hopefully someday they will all understand this & finally feel what true prospering love & partnership taste like 👑😏
amen to that
But women need to stand up, stop sleeping with a guy without a commitment, and have the courage to stop it if there's no long term in sight.
Men arent supposed to behave any sort of way. Stop assigning roles to us. Why do women take rejection so damn hard. Why do women get told 100% honest things from guys and still think it has some hidden meaning. If a guy says he only wants things casual then thats all he wants. Youre welcome to keep seeing him if you want, you never know maybe he will change his mind. I wouldnt hold out hope though
Thank you Steve for enlightening this girl! She was never a part of his real day...
"you hate him now, dont you? lol
Did she really need Steve to figure this one out? #reallySusan🤔
Yes. Because women are delusional when it comes to these sorts of things.
I thought the exact same thing.... I don't get it. He has another woman....duh sweetie!
Christy Bloo that’s what I thought. As soon as I seen the canceling and then able to meet up later that night. Clear what he wanted lol
Well, it's called being human. In a dude we'd call this being "p-whipped" where we let awful women use and abuse us. Our biology can be our own worst enemy and make us blind to all sorts of bad things when we have strong feelings. Not her fault, she's human.
Deep down she knew... she just needed some1 to tell her
As a man, I can vouch for what Steve says. He knows the deal and he's honest in his assessments.
My humble opinion. Level up in your mind and heart first and know that you deserve better and don’t waiver
Bless her heart. She look so cute but sad at the same time.
That's a setup for the bootycall. Steve helped her tho. It's understandable, every young woman isn't up on game like that.
Bruh..
Man O War word
yeah how are we supposed to know?
In all honesty its quite easy for us as the third party to clearly see how this guy played her but if you were in her shoes you wouldn’t get the picture at all
Oh i def would have. You would think at a certain age youll know but i guess sone still clueless
exactly
So truee. Even this foolishness I went through it but I could sense when it's about others relationships
@@gracee2grace yeah because you so want them to be honest and genuine
Right .... Y'all remember too that she's young(25) ... Being on the outside looking in we can say this n that about her or what we would/wouldn't do ... But, think back, at some point we've all played the Fool, falling for a guy who was FOS! ... That's how we've learned the things we know now, bcos we've been in her shoes, once ... At one time or another everybody's played the Fool; Its a hard knocks life, but she'll learn.
Mannn.. I'm 23 and I've been there AND I'M NOT GOING BACK!!! . My heart isnt something to be played with and I CAN'T BE WASTING my time with guys who just wants to live in the moment becuz they are so fixed with the mentally that "oh, we are young" That's selfish; Especially, if a girl would give u the whole damn world. So yeah, it's better to be single. That was a huge Red flag and an ABORT mission sign. The sad thing about it is that she probably missed some of the signs becuz she got caught up.😔😔 I feel yuh Girl.
Most people understand when they are not the one, but they end up listening to their heart instead of their brain.
Wow...I was there a few times. I had to learn the hard way that guys are very easy to figure out. It was clear that he wasn't interested when he canceled via text.
Friends with a little bit on top??
Girl, he only wants your cookie! There's nothing serious about him on this. Spend your time finding the right guy, dont'waste it with these kind of people. 😘
Cmon ladies, that is such a clear sign. If y’all don’t know how to decipher texts like that, then these men will play you like a puppet and waste your youth
She seems desperate. Like she's doing nothing else with her time or life except waiting for him to respond to her.
Rose J she just have a lot of feelings and he’s making her wait by playing games. Hope she realize she’s worth more than what he makes her feel.
Someone has knocked the self respect, self awareness and self confidence out of this beautiful young woman. She has no idea of her selfworth or how to set a boundary to stay safe and get the respect she deserves. I sure hope she learns, stays in school and powers up her self esteem to know a winner in the future. Poor kid.
He married.......LOL!
That's exactly what I said when he told her only at night!🤦🏽♀️
I can't agree more. 😂
Either married or in a relationship.
Exactly
Yup. That’s my diagnosis.
When someone show you who they are....please believe them!!!
We've all been there and Steve was spot on
Steve looks awesome with the beard
syndi301 yess
Yes, he is funny man.
@@upward94 Yes
Someone worthy of you will capture your heart and will appreciate you
I love this kind of love & life advice from Steve. It’s like getting advice from a father figure I never had.
“Boy byyye!” Girl, you are worth it!!
Ladies! Quit being desperate. If you're a lady, be a lady. Let him pursue you. ( I didn't say 'chase', I said 'pursue'). God BlessYall💚💛PeaceNLove
Amen to that! There's nothing wrong a man chasing either....as long as she'll be right for him.
The man the God has for you will purse you! "He who finds a wife, finds a good thing".
@@TheJanayWellsShow amen!💚
Dazzling Jewel it’s sad how so so many don’t see this and it’s the conditioning of society we just have to wake up
its possible for ladies to pursue men too...
He is a player or married
Love that. Direct & to the point, not meant to hurt but to educate. Thanks, Steve. I've learned so much from you. You make so much sense.
“My time is valuable and you’re not in control of my time” yep! Amen! With anyone and anything and especially in dating. Hallelujah!!
"I have no time for foolishness". Yet here she is having been dealing with this foolishness for 8 months!
Steve, you the man.
As soon as he said something came up - I said, “He means another woman!“
Thank you Steve. No beating around the bush.
That's why I'm pretty much done with dating. I'll continue achieving my goals and dreams and naturally without desperation perhaps might come. That means NO benefits before marriage. It means delayed gratification.
Worked for me :) I found a wonderful man who values me for who I am. Definitely worth the wait! I hope you find (or have found) the right person for you.
Thank you Steve for being a great big brother by helping us ladies to recognize when men are running game.
Lemme leave this here🙂
Advice is what we seek when we don’t wanna accept the truth, y’all stay safe♥️
She said she doesn't have time for foolishness yet she's the fool! Girl, move on!!!
She's trying to act stronger than she is
wait, are you perfect?
She sounds desperate to go out with him. He stood me up there wouldn't be a next time. Alot of women seem so eager to get any man.
I love steve harveys suit! Sharp!
I also think this girl knew what the text meant. She just needed confirmation. I mean, come on now. That message was clear as day.
When a woman is really into a man they will make up their on excuse for his behaviors. If that was her girlfriend and not her she would have gave that same advice.
What kind of man sends a text like that? You are just a friend with a little on top.
A dog
Booty call
Steve is a relationship expert. He knows a lot about playing around.
People are so mean towards this young lady on the comments. We have one way of showing genuine interest in somebody as women. It's a challenge for anybody to see clearly obvious signs/being baited when they like someone. And Steve was the necessary help, like any other external person would in a similar situation . So just chill. Mxxm
Ora Mahura Thank you for this comment because I’m reading like so many people have some many negative things to say but nobody in this world is perfect but sounds like so many people got it together and always had it together but I know that’s not the truth. The world is so cruel with how they treat and talk about people!!
In 8 months that can't be the first time he's made comments like that. Maybe she really thought it was gonna be more than what it was but 9/10 it ain't. I just find it difficult to believe that she didn't get the picture before now
Uncle Steve filled in the blanks perfectly “don’t think I can’t cancel at any time because now you know”....kick rocks male waste of time!
Don't text, talk.instead.
I dont mind texts if hes setting up actual dates and staying in touch in the beginning.. But when a man actually calls its very attractive:)
Exactly. I don't get these millennials always texting for dumb reason. When it comes to a serious conversation, you pick up the phone and call to talk......no text
That what said talk to me I hate texting
Matthew Burroughs this is so true, I can’t tell you the amount of things I found out about man just by talking to them on the phone instead of texting it really has saved me a lot of time of going on crazy dates with these man just by talking to them on the phone. Texting is so fake these man pretend to be your “Mr Perfect” on text but their true colours come out once they are on the phone. Trust me ladies it works!
Just like the movie "He's Just Not That Into You"
Tell this woman denial is not a river in Egypt.
If you can't see me in the daytime like normal people do, then you DAMN sho ain't coming to the house during MY after hours! I got things to do so I would be like boy bye!!! I have seen and heard it all before. You may fall for it a time or two but you wake up after awhile
O'nella is a really unique name tbh good thing she found out now.
"Here's what he really means" ??!?!
He straight out SAID IT!
She young. These women need mother friends sisters & life to teach them. Number one rule see what a man says and actually does. Number 2 rule even if he seems to commit & you've been together for about a year + doesn't necessarily mean he ain't crazy, possessive, has serious issues so, u need put yourself in a situation where you can securely choose to detach If crazy comes out. This man flat out said we are just friends with benefits. & When he said he was available at 10/10:30 (pm presumably)she should have flat out said No. these type of women are just putty in the hands of these players, these thirsty dudes. She is still in the Dummy Institute not graduated yet
It's good to know what men really think. Men have a slick way of saying things and think we don't know what's really going on.
Momma always said if he only can visit after 8 everytime he is somewhere else early. 🤗
Girl, Honey....you are so beautiful....Hair on point, skin, smile, eyes, on point, fashion/style on point..sweet personality...gentle/compassionate demeanor and that's just the beginning cause I don't even know you as a person....YOU ARE WAY TOO GOOD FOR THIS GUY's BREAD CRUMBS...Keep it moving Susan- you will find better
He can keep his little bit in his pants...and keep them buttoned all the way to the top. I knew when he said 10 or 10:30 that she was just a booty call...the only thing open after 9 during the week is 7/11 and the emergency room
ryan tabb Stupid!
ryan tabb LOL so true
hehe :)
ryan tabb and legs
Lol....girl you had me laughing so hard...7/11 and emergency room.
Awesome advice!!! And incredibly brave to go in front of the world with questions all we women need the answers to! Thank you!
She needed Steve to decode those messages?? 😑
👀 right
Imma put this on every video I watch. I ♥️ Steve - he's kind, funny and straightforward! We need you Steve!!
I was thinking the same thing y O'Nella text back then added @ the end "lol"...Well she young
“Set it up for us” Steve is so naturally smooth
He gone text her tonight at 10/10:30 like 'wyd' and she gone respond like 'omw!'
Ari guilty 🤣🤣🤣🤣😱😱😱done that before 🤦🏾♂️
Exactly... she done put into too much time so when he ready, she will be too smh. Definitely been there, done that
Sad case but true. She seem like a weak minded lady. I mean to seriously get advice
The way she responded and handled was perfectly! That 'lol' is perfect too, she's being playful AND setting up her boundary!
And you can't blame the guy too much, he was honest and it wasn't that confusing to read either. The girl was trying to make it something she wanted to see instead. She wanted to deny the situation. She knew she need to let him go, she just didn't want to. She was the one fooling herself :/
When he said 10pm?
Run lady.
Why you giving him anything for free. This guy is going to give you dieseas.
I love Steve but alot of the stuff he says is COMMON SENSE. I'm not meeting up with no guy after 9 during the work week. She's settling. Smh.
That's you but she was in denial. She's 25 and desperate. She wanted to see what she wanted to see.
It's absolutely common sense
Smh.
@@bjishername It's still common sense. 25 years old is old enough to know better. A teeneager can recognize that for what it was.
Common sense is not that common... bcuz we wouldn't b going through what we ALL go through n this world ups & down
@@user-zx5xw4yw2e you didn't see her facial expression when Steve told her the truth. Watch her facial expression.
I’m a college student with 2 majors and 2 jobs. Booty call hours during the week are 8-10pm and 10-12 on weekends. No time for foolishness 🙅🏽♀️🙅🏽♀️🙅🏽♀️
See that's the thing,we don't know his work or school hours etc.On that particular day,10:30 might be the only time he is free
You’re never good enough for the wrong person
He’s in a relationship clearly!
That hit real deep. I heard Mr Harvey loud and clear. Nice one Mr Harvey. You make a difference man!
I truly thank Marjorie for liking Steve's gray beard it looks amazing on him! Fits him better than the black beard honestly
WOW!!!!!
Mr. Steve Harvey looks GREAT!
This hits WAY TOO CLOSE TO HOME. Just found out this afternoon, the guy I've been seeing for 5 weeks is back on OKCupid. yes...I was checking.Why can't men just be honest?
Cheryl Mills if you were seeing someone why you checking up on a dating site?
Cheryl Mills
did u meet him on that site... & was checking 2 see if he was still on there ❓have u both been on a date yet ❓
So what if he was on there?
You might be seeing him but is he? Unless you've had that conversation of being exclusive you should still have your profile up
5 weeks!! Girrl keep your post up and see other people. You should be having one date a week with different men.
Just don't be 💋 n thangs.
Just have fun.
I'm not mad at the guy... He is being upfront. He told her exactly how he feels about her. I respect that more than being lied to and going through (possibly) years of a bad relationship.
It's her fault for sticking around if that isn't what she is looking for.
Felt sorry 4 her😿
Straight up truth. The guy was a red flag from the first text. This young woman is beautiful, I hope she managed to find the right guy for her ✨