I Can Defend The Character Ladybird
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- Опубликовано: 26 окт 2023
- i dont care i dont care idont care i will defend her everyday as long as i live i was born to defend her!
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I dont know how but it makes me nostalgic for Sacremento, Ive never been to Sacremento.
as someone who lives in sacramento. i don’t even *like* it here and it makes me nostalgic for sacramento
this movie hit even more for me because my mom grew up in sacramento, she grew up with an abusive mom and this movie always makes me think about the traumas that my mom went through too. we've had a complicated and difficult relationship at times but this movie really makes me empathize with her
“but do you like me?” rewired my brain chemistry. truly a devastating line
Ditto, it's sad that while we certainly love our family members, we don't always like them very much, perhaps due to clashing personalities.
THIS. I realized this with my family.@@trinaq
I'm not a girl, but I've had this same exact conversation with my mother like three times and all of them she has given out exactly the same response as Lady Bird's mom
Like I my brain grew 2 sizes that day
I also really like how Marion tries to answer it, that she wants LB to be the best version of herself that she can be. And when LB asks, "what if this is the best version of me?" Marion doesn't respond.
And when Lucas Hedges reveals to Marion that LB is on the waitlist for the New York university, which is something that rewards the best version of Lady Bird, Marion doesn't respond to LB until the car trip to the airport.
Julie was honestly so real in this movie like
1. Never kissed anyone before
2. Bought a prom dress in hopes of being asked but instead stays home and cries
3. Can’t imagine herself getting out of her small town
Like she’s serving realness and I appreciate it
Would love to watch a movie about her experiences they’re so much like mine
No bc fr i always thought I was ladybird and i now realize I was a Julie all along, which I think is in character for Julie too, she thinks she’s just like ladybird and they’re just the same until she makes new friends then prom and she eventually moves away to college and the diff btw them is clear
@@nayaabshah1155I would say the novel Eileen is a darker, more disturbing look into the perspective of the “side character” girly. She rarely does anything and it eats her alive
shes so me
i think that's why Ladybird never learns when her mother makes valid points. The mother ends every good lesson with an insult, and thats all Ladybird will think about later. None of the actually good points her mother made.
This was an unique coming of age movie, told from both the teenager and the parent's perspectives. Marion may seem as overally demanding, but her behaviour makes more sense when she mentions that her mother was an abusive alcoholic. While it doesn't excuse how she treats Ladybird, her face in the car after Ladybird leaves for college shows that Marion realised that she was unintentionally repeating the same things her mother had said back at her own daughter.
I think a lot of Marion’s actions in the movie can be attributed to the trauma that she faced during her childhood. When LB reads Marion’s unfinished letters that Larry snuck in her suitcase, Larry explained that Marion didn’t want to show them because she didn’t want LB to criticize her spelling.
But knowing that Larry himself was suffering from something similar, it’s probably just code for “I’m scared that if I pour my heart out to you, you will reject me and rub it in my face”. And confession is a hard thing to do, especially with abuse victims like Marion. I think it says a lot that Lady Bird succeeds so much at pouring her heart out to other people, while her mom just couldn’t do the same because of her trauma.
Ladybird jumping out of the car is my intrusive thoughts
No literally. NO. LIT TER RAL LY
I feel like this and if you are pro-choice, that comment she made about abortion is probably also an intrusive thought lol
“Often father and daughter look down on mother (woman) together. They exchange meaningful glances when she misses a point. They agree that she is not bright as they are, cannot reason as they do. This collusion does not save the daughter from the mother’s fate” this quote by Bonnie Burstow is exactly what Trin said at the end of the video about how often (especially in movies) the father and daughter bond through mocking the mother and it breaks my heart.
I don’t know if anyone else did. But during one of my rewatches I paused during the letter scene and tried to read them. They’re not all shown. But her mom basically talks about how she wishes they could be friends and she doesn’t know when their relationship took a turn. She also talks about the day Lady Bird was born and when she named her Christine and how she loved her before she even knew her. Then Lady Bird goes to the party and introduces herself as Christine. It made me sob and made me love the movie even more.
There's also the part where Marion actually had LB when she was 42 (which is hard to do), and before that, adopted Miguel. It made me think that Marion and Larry found it hard to conceive a baby, and even had miscarriages or stillbirths before adopting Miguel and conceiving Baby Bird.
To me, I think Marion had this idea (and NOT that I blame her!) that Lady Bird would be this particular child that would love Sacramento with all her heart and stay there, because that's the kid she wanted for so many years since she thought of having a baby, but she wasn't. And that's okay.
Also, I love the part where Marion says that she's sorry for being too hard on Lady Bird, for wanting her to be "too much of an idea of Lady Bird Marion wanted to be", I thought it was a nice callback to Lady Bird being sorry "for wanting more" instead of "too much".
@@mackielunkey2205 Also, Marion (LB's mom) mentioned in the movie that she grew up with an alcoholic parent who was, at the least, emotionally abusive to her (and probably worse, IMO)--and when you realize that, Marion's behavior makes some sense (not that it's justified in any way, IMO)...
i cannot dislike her because she is me
Same. Literally
scary
“Nothing more devastating then the theatre boy you like being gay” is the quote of the decade actually
The way the father physically deflates when he sees them fighting gets to me. No wonder he's depressed; he feels like a worthless human being, unable to save his own household from ruin. He only shows happiness when he has a chance to help someone.
No, Ladybird's mother is abusive. There's no discussion to be had about that. Ladybird is annoying and entitled, but what teenager isn't? The mother takes every opportunity to insult her daughter and acts like its Ladybird's fault that she was born instead of taking accountability for her own miscalculation and possible regret over having a second child. None of that is Ladybird's fault, yet she is being made to take all of the blame.
Sing it sister, I’ve seen people call Ladybird “selfish” for wanting to leave and go to a good college
What always sticks out to me is lady bird immediately coming defend her mom whenever danny calls her scary or mean. It’s like ya, she isn’t the warmest but you’re not allowed to call her cold! It represent their mother daughter relationship so well!
Ladybird and her dad's relationship really gives me positive joy. While Marion and Ladybird don't always see eye to eye, it's great that she has an ally in Larry, who goes out of his way to help her with her dream school, while grappling with his own depression.
Ladybird truly is one of the best coming of age movies, the way they portray a mother daughter relationship realistically like no movie has ever done before. Also I never really thought about the fact that Ladybird and her dad never talk badly about their mother, but it's interesting that you pointed it out, I truly do think this shows the way Ladybird actually does care deeply about her mother, the same way she always defends her mom when she talks to friends
To me that also had the air of “I can badmouth my family but goddamn it no one else can”
actually, Trin, I did like seeing that guy dancing on a dance academy, thank you very much
Something I have learned in therapy after growing up with my own version of Marion, it is that people like that only know to connect through criticism. In a very messed up way, it is a way of “caring” without making yourself vulnerable. The fact that Marion was nicer to everyone but Ladybird hit so close to home. I spend years thinking I was the problem, but in fact, it is more about dysfunctional family dynamics.
To connect to Lady Bird, I think what Good Will Hunting does really really well is understand how abuse victims have these toxic behaviors and are stuck in despair because they spend years or decades as kids and teens being jaded by the abuse happening through parenting styles or situations that no kid should ever be in, and the key is to understand that it was horrible whether you grew from it or not. For example, Will was scared of opening up because he's used to thinking that he can only pick punishments instead of rewards when he was a kid, and Sean was stuck in a depression because of how his wife's death reopened a wound that was long present from the trauma he had developed when trying to parent his mom and brother when his father was an abusive alcoholic, much like Marion's mother, towards them.
For Marion in Lady Bird, she couldn't properly develop the skills to help her understand that what happened to her in her childhood was horrible, and that it had no purpose. Larry was stuck with his own issues, so he didn't have all the skills to help Marion help herself. So, what Lady Bird gets is a pessimistic parent that criticizes her a ton because she wasn't able to learn to cut herself some slack.
You are NOT a problem.
I didn't realize that the first time I watched Ladybird it would be so relatable. And it sucks to say that me and my mom's relationship is EXACTLY like this movie, point for point. The arguments they have are so familiar to me, esPECIALLY when they are arguing and suddenly find something they both enjoy like in the thrift store, and suddenly everything is okay and they are reset. I rewatched this on a plane recently and sobbed
Yes. I felt this. This movie is so accurate
I watched this for the first time on a plane and also cried lol. The scene where they’re in the change room, or when they’re going to open houses. I teared up again watching that scene in this RUclips video 💀💀 how did Greta capture the mother daughter relationship so accurately.
it was lady bird shouting "talk to meeee!!!" at her silent mom for me -__- that part hit wayyy too close to home
It's such a strong message about how hard it is to break generational trauma, and how easy it is to pass it along to the next gen, even if someone knows they don't want to be like their own parents.
I love ladybird the character, but I find myself feeling sympathy for the mom a lot as well which confuses me. I’m a daughter but I think the “having a hard time showing love” really got me. Specifically toward the end of the movie. I find them both insufferable and also lovely people. My added point is that I want to hear more people talk about the mom outside of the family and how her job caring for people mirrors ladybird’s care for people as well.
ladybird defender till the day i DIE 🗣️‼️
the crying at any scene which is even slightly emotional is so real 😭
Ladybird reaffirmed my love for coming of age stories. and it was my introduction to the queen Greta Gerwig.
Trin mentioning Jordan Rodriguez and Dance Academy is SOOO REALLL
This movie RIPS my heart out because it is almost exactly the same experience I had as a teenager. Growing up poor, dad losing his job, wanting more/wanting out, and the mother daughter dynamic is the exact same as my own. We even had some of those same fights & discussions. I love this movie so much
Ladybird was literally a cultural reset for me. 14 year old me never related more tk this random yt girl
I thought you meant RUclips I was so confused lol
Nah fr damn my Mexican ass here like……
I avoided this film like the plague for so long, I haven’t spoken to my mom in 10 years and the other day I got an email asking if I wanted to come over for Christmas. I said no. And I haven’t heard back from her.
I like this film but I can’t look at it directly. It’s to raw.
YOU MENTIONING THE BROTHER WAS IN DANCE ACADEMY MADE ME SO HAPPY OH MY GOD no one ever knows that show😭
this movie makes me cry every time i watch it. it reminds me of my relationship with my mom a lot. when i lived in sacramento i would sometimes remember the scene of ladybird’s mom crying in the car at the end and i’d start crying, driving on that same bridge. 😂
timothee does a really good job of playing unlikable characters lmao. i think this is the first movie i saw him in and i’ve stanned since. your reactions are mine too lol
Also just watched the silent treatment part of the video and god the reality of it sucks. I dont understand how my mom is able to do it to me, I would never do that to my kid. It's just such a crazy thing to do as a human to another human begging for socialization or a response or just anything in return
the reaction to kyle is so valid I'm screaming. but on a serious note ladybird broke me the first time and its a movie i can never really watch properly again because its just too real to me.
This is the movie that made me discover timotheè and I remember that feeling of, “im gonna google him later” 😂
lol same
I think my perspective of this movie is that nobody who decides to become a mother really understands both sides . Lemme explain
Daughters, all they know is how to be a daughter. They don’t have a motherly instinct yet or the struggles of being a mom, whether it’s a working mom or stay at home mom or whatever type of mom. They don’t know.
But mothers. Mothers were once daughters, they still are. They’re a daughter to someone. But I think the moment they see the two lines on a test, that all goes out the window. They become mothers, they are having a child and there world becomes about that child. Going to doctor’s appointments, preparing for birth, ensuring their baby is healthy and watching them grow. They forget what being a daughter is truly like because their mindset has shifted to take care of their child. That’s not a bad thing at all but they’re caring for another human that that becomes more important.
Both sides can’t really understand each other which is why this movie can be biased depending on the persons perspective and a mother might agree more with the mother and a daughter with the daughter. There is no bad guy, there is no good guy. Just people. And I think a message I’ve taken from it, is that we forget we are just people. Moms are just people. Daughters are just people. Sons, fathers, step parents, siblings, neighbours, strangers, they’re just people. We all bleed red
As a mother whos kid was bad af growing up, (theyre actually turning 20 tomorrow..they old) there has never been a day that has gone by nor ever will go by, even on the worst and even most unapreciated days, where that kid would never not know love from me.
“He would be okay with a bed bug epidemic” HELP???
THANK YOU! I get so frustrated when people defend LB's mother when they just don't get how very flawed the mother is
This video is for the lady bird type of girls (i'm one of them)
Really curious to see a mom's take on this movie, especially an Asian/African one that grew up with their own generational trauma related to parenting in their culture
What i hate the most about movies that claim to have a 'complicated' mother-daughter relationship is that theyre too afraid to say abusive. I dont care how relateable or traumatized or sad ladybird's mom is, because she's still abusive at the end of the day. Those things can all be true at the same time. You can feel empathy and pity and relate to her and still recognize that she was often emotionally abusive towards her daughter. And the way that ladybird treats her mom is called 'reactive abuse.' Because how else is she supposed to act in the face of such a painful situation. She's the child in this family unit and her mother should be held accountable for how horribly she treats her kid even if she 'cant help it'
I hated the ending, if you couldn't tell. They both need therapy, not another reset that doesnt change the cycle at all.Greta gerwig's films always end up having to do with motherhood in a way that really bothers me. Even in barbie, the concept of womanhood was so tangled up with motherhood that i couldnt fully enjoy the end of it. Women dont have to be mothers to fully be women and mothers dont have to 'stop to watch how far their daughters go' or whatever. They should walk together. They should trust each other on top of loving each other. Gods it's so frustrating
Yes, yes to alllll of this
Thank you!!!
I have a very abusive mother, I'm 20 and it still affects me but I must say that there are a lot of grey areas. I love how greta portrays it because irl there can't be a simple solution to this problem. And as much as I'd like to work it out with my mom, I can't
This!!!! I think the movies Greta Gerwig directs also depict womanhood in a very white and binary kinda way that can make it isolating for people who dont fit in those categories. Personally as a nonbinary person i also feel like a strange spectator over looking the films occasionally connecting with some things but most of the time just in the outside looking in.
as a non white viewer ( im sorry if this seems rude) but the "whataboutism" is so real with your comment. not everyone is meant to relate to everything and thats okay. the fact is she is going to write from that pov because she is a white woman. we have to get out of the mindset that everything needs to be relatable, its just unrealistic and frankly immature. its time to realize that the world isn't made to cater to your wants and needs, and not everything is going to include you, or be relatable to you and that is okay. @@crakandra9672
I always liked Ladybird's character. She reminds me a bit of myself. I'm not ashamed of where I come from, but just wanting to recreate myself and figure out who I am and elope away from family and just be myself.
Also, when she rolled out the car and broke her arm, I've had those intrusive thoughts before. Never did it, but I've had those thoughts. Yes, my mom was in the driver's seat.
I think also, when movies become really popular online, a lot of the story gets erased in favor of aesthetics or a few key screencaps. so I do think it's important to keep talking about them in a fuller sense, and appreciate it for the writing and acting, not just the vibes and aesthetic
I relate to lady bird in so many ways, like the mommy issues, but the scene where she's yelling at timothee's character and then asks if they're still going to prom hits me so much. I was SA'd and pressured by a guy into having sex and after the date I had told him not to do that again the next time we hung out. Luckily he stopped talking to me otherwise i would have kept talking to him because I was so desperate for love. Even if it wasn't real
I've never related more to this movie more than when I recently moved out of my childhood home into my own apartment. The separation truly puts things into perspective that is difficult to see or handle when still in the same environment as the mother.
The relationship Ladybird has with her mom is the same relationship I have with my dad. It's just really hard for him to accept that his way to do things is not the only way and I need to carve my own path.
tbh i wanted to LOVE this movie but i just can't. it really truly seems to attempt to have us sympathize with the mother, equally as much as ladybird, which just makes me feel gaslit in the way that emotionally immature parents do (hehe). i want to love this movie because i relate SO MUCH even through all of the differences between my life and ladybird's. but it just made me so upset that they couldn't, or wouldn't, make ladybird as realistically flawed as she was without ruining it all by painting things as if her and her mother were equally 'wrong' or 'right'. like she is a TEENAGE GIRL. all the stuff she does is developmentally normal for her situation and the way she has experienced the world. the mother had a shitty childhood, too, but she is an adult and volunteered to have her own kids, and instead of breaking the cycle of pain from mother to daughter, she continues it by using her own mother's abuse and neglect to justify everything she does wrong. she is not behaving the way she should as an adult nor as a mother. she has responsibility to be respectful, because she chose to be a mother of two children. meanwhile, ladybird has NO responsibility that she asked for, and if she is disrespectful or disobedient there are consequences, some fair, some unfair. that is the difference, and people should never look at a mother and daughter and believe that, because they are both equally emotionally mature or immature, that they are both equally wrong to be that way towards each other. that's like saying its ok for your math tutor to get paid by the hour when they have no idea what they're doing and they know it but won't admit to it, just because you don't know the math either. rant over lmao
This is a movie I'm afraid to watch with my mom 😅 Also, love the little edits you include at the beginning of your A24 film reviews! The car scene always gets me even though it's played off sort of comedically. I know someone who was fighting with their mom in the car and she hopped out of the vehicle...and her mom took off and left her there ...in the middle of nowhere. Like.....
Ladybird is one of my comfort movies, most because it reminds me of me and my mom, we dont have a great relationship at all and its currently very strained. Every conversation ladybird has had i have had with my mother. My dad on the other hand, me and him have basically the same relationship ladybird and her dad have, he also just lost his job and we are struggling with money, while im still in school and trying to work hard to get into my dream school i might not because money is tight. Ladybird is one of the best movies ive watched, the scenery is so beautiful but so is the story, while its also sad.
i hope it works out for youu going to your dream school!!
Your reaction and this movie made me emotional too. My father was abused physically and mentally by his own father. He had me when he was 18 and abused me too. I grew up most of my life wanting my father to see me for who I was. To find that acceptance but it never came.
the "i guess we're going for the same job".. sobbing crying every time
I watched Ladybird for the first time with my sister this year and she instantly became one of our favourite characters. I was shook at how much we resonated with her and I also enjoyed recognizing so many people in the movie lmao
Lady Bird is literally just one of the best masterpieces that A24 has to offer. I said what i said
Have you ever considered watching/doing commentary on Gilmore girls? I am beyond interested in hearing your takes on the Gilmores and the Dean vs. Jess vs. Tristan debate
She’s also the mother of Andy in Toy Story
Your voice is unique it's so relaxing
I cried all the way with you Trin!!!!
Sacramento being the capital of California makes him not knowing what it is is soooo much funnier to me
I haven’t seen Lady Bird yet, but after watching your video I think I literally have to for my own healing. The mother-daughter relationship is way too relatable
Everyone has flaws, I’m glad this movie didn’t make her “perfect” like many young adult stories. However, she’s very much the type of person that I could not be around.
i can't even THINK about ladybird without spbbing oml T__T that movie ruined me. its so special in my heart. one of the most heartbreaking things that ever happened to me was watching that movie with my mum, and her conclusion was simply that ladybird should have been nicer to her mum, and i remember how much in that moment it hurt :( never seen any media that represented the deep complicated mother daughter relationship like this movie
We can all defend Lady Bird she’s literally so relatable, she’s all of us! She’s a star!
I did in fact love watching "miguel" dance around in dance academy... christian was one of my first tv crushes so I'm always delighted when he's in stuff
girl i haven’t seen the movie and the scenes u showed made me cry
I'm not a mom but I can see the mother's point of view a lot maybe because I see my mom in her a lot. I think once your'e not a teenager anymore you can look back on how you treat your parents with some empathy towards them and as a parent you can't always remember what it's like to been a teenager and can be harsh on them. I think Lady Birds mom just wants what's best for her and she thinks that pushing her to prove her wrong will be the way to get results from her
nah why am i crying at the letter scene ahhhh
Watching this with my own mother was a Time. It didnt really click with me the first time but its grown on me since ive rewatched it
Literally watched Lady Bird like last week and I honestly didn't think I would like it much at first but by the end of the movie I was completely moved and it was such a beautiful and touching movie. Especially with me also having a complicated relationship with my parents and being fresh out of highschool it just felt like the perfect film that I needed to see.
you don’t need to apologize for feeling emotional!! i am sooo the same way and i think it’s relatable and appreciate the vulnerability ❤️ this movie always hits me to my core. i also watched it for the first time when i was at my college orientation, my first night away at school, and i still think about that time specifically whenever i watch or hear about ladybird
Trim mentioning dance academy is my Roman Empire
this was for the girls and the gays and we thank you for your service xoxo
i watched ladybird in quarantine in freshmen year of college and i loved the dynamic they showed between both the mom and the daughter, i thought the movie was hilarious, nuanced and encompassed a lot of complicated mother and daughter relationships. also i rewatched it a second time around my second year and i was going to college in sacramento where this film was filmed which the first time around i didnt take notice of it but only did the second time. and it was mainly because i chose to do a movie analysis on the film for my class. it felt so nostalgic and now i hold such a deep connection to this film whenever i think about my four years in sacramento :')
“Oh My GoD! ShE iS sO SeLfIsH fOr WaNtInG a BeTtER LiFe!!” I’ve literally seen people agree with the mom and say that she’s “completely” right, how is wanting to go to a good school and get a better future “selfish”? I can understand Marion and that she obviously has a lot of her own trauma, but that doesn’t mean holding your kids away from their potential or guilt them into doing whatever they think is best
The mom wasnt perfect but she wasn't definetly not mean. Ladybird wasn't innocent either but she did get mistreated by her mother
I can’t WAITTT when Priscilla comes out. A24 is gunna eat this one up I fear..
ur editing is always top notch ✨ it always makes the video even more enjoyable and hilarious :))
YESSSSS i’ve been waiting for this one
IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE
saw this title and went "ppl actually don't like ladybird???"
My favorite movie! Thanks Trin!
This is a good movie!
I was hoping it would win Best Picture, but Guillermo Del Toro's Shape Of Water took home the Oscar!
Also my birthday is Monday, I'll be 33 this year!
It's been a minute since I watched Lady Bird and I loved it both times but didn't know why exactly. I had newfound appreciation for my mom after knowing that she wasn't like this but hearing your analysis made me wonder if my parents really did like me at times- not all the time, but it was when expressing certain interests that I felt like the odd one out. I know I made the right decisions and got through school successfully but I don't think I put any work into getting to know myself because I wanted them to like me and I feel like if I were to just express any flaws at all(or just express teen adolescence/experimentation in general) then they would be ashamed of me, and your analysis made me realize that I was worried about being liked so much that I embody trying to be unproblematic as possible to the point that I hate when I accidentally mess up and don't know how to fix it whenever I do bc I try my hardest to not mess up.
I love this movie and seeing you review it is so exciting!!
I remember first watching this with my mom and side eyeing to see if we were crying then at the end gave eachother a hug
Loved this video but Omg I can’t believe I never noticed the “my best friend is a vampire” picture on your wall. I absolutely love that film
What if I told y'all that I saw this in theaters WITH MY MOM
:D
my roman empire
this film always makes me homesick :,)
I LOVE this movie! Also i loved another Soarise movie called Brooklyn. It’s beautiful
I had a breakdown while watching this. I love rewatching movies but I love myself too much to rewatch Lady Bird again
great video, made me appreciate this movie more. i miss my mom so much
oh i am SO excited for this
YAYy trin posted
Im not joking when I say, watching Lady Bird and seeing all the dudes ive dated in Kyle, finally made me find them disgusting and immature. Ive always been a sucker for the artsy depresso dude but after watching the movie i got like an objective POV of dudes like that and i do NOT find them attractive anymore. Like WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!
Everything you said is valid. This film is perfect and terrible and heart wrenching… and a little bit toooo real. I will always hold a special place in my heart for this movie no matter how difficult it can be to watch.
Dude not me crying with you and I've not even seen this movie
All I could think of is my son asking me to like him and I'm bawling
i love this movie so much because this is exactly what my relationship with my mother looks like
5:34 yeah, I had my own version of this with my mom. I saw where the conversation of judgement and projected shame was going to and I said, I need to go to bed can we talk about this tomorrow. And then it went into my mom yelling at me, talking about her upbringing and childhood as if to compare, no emotional support, just invalidation.. i cried myself to sleep that night. It's just so draining 🙄🙄😒
Ladybird is one of the best movies to come out in recent years. Greta is such brilliant story teller, in her writing and directing alike. I hope we get a million more movies from her.
This movie is so relatable to me omg i get so teary eyed
Three minutes in and you already pointed it 😂
19:52 thats cinema! the perfect tear me thinks
trin please do a commentary on a walk to remember 😭😭 i’m begging you